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... Send TELLULAH a private message | | | TELLULAH's profile:Hi, I have been through loads in my life. Marriage break up, boyfriend break ups, and been a single parent. I have been treated really bad sometimes, but i think this is all to do with life. I dont hold grudges, and have a good sence of humour. I just love all my friends and family, and have loads of support from them. So i thought i could share that with a few of you. I have asked for advice a few times. You dont always want to hear it, but there are some smart people out there.
I have now found, after a lot of searching, my soul mate. But lifes not all a bed of roses for us. But he keeps me smiling, well most of the time anyway. |
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How do I build a wall between me and this colleague...?
Q. I had sex with my colleague, whom I have fancied for a long time, (I never hinted that I liked him though), he has been having fantasies about me as well. So, we did it but spoke first that there won't be feelings involved, as he has a girlfriend ...
A. 22 September 2009: Your both adults, and you took a risk. I dont believe that either of you really love your partners otherwise this would not have happened. Perhaps its time to move on and find a man that you can stay faithfull to.... (read in full...)
I'm not sure I'm brave enough to break up with him
Q. I am in a dilemma. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 4 years now...long time! I do love him and most of the time everything is perfect...however every few weeks we have arguments about random things and I get so many doubts about our ...
A. 18 August 2009: Hi,
As you get older your priority's change. What's important to you now, may not be in 10 years time. All I am saying is that you should trust you heart.
Because I had a wonderfull B/F when I was at school, and we stayed together for almost 7... (read in full...)
I'm not sure I'm brave enough to break up with him
Q. I am in a dilemma. I have been with my boyfriend for nearly 4 years now...long time! I do love him and most of the time everything is perfect...however every few weeks we have arguments about random things and I get so many doubts about our ...
A. 18 August 2009: Go with your heart..if you feel you are missing out, then find out. But dont leave your B/F for another guy, because it will only cloud your judgement. Have some time on your own, and have some fun with your mates.
A word of warning though "The gras... (read in full...)
He seems insensitive - should I dump him?
Q. Hi - I have been with my boyfriend 3 years but I am worrying we are just not compatible because every now and then he says the most insensitive things. Just one example which plays on my mind and still upsets me was before Xmas my 92 year old ...
A. 18 August 2009: Hi again,
What a complete heartless bastard. He is trying to make you feel bad for HIS horrible remarks. Dump him honey, you dont need a man like that in your life.
XXX... (read in full...)
Will using a vibrator make it harder for me to orgasm during sex?
Q. okay so i use a back masager or idk but it just vibrates but anyways i use that to have orgasms i put it right on my clit i dont move it around or anything i jus set it there..im just wondering can that make it harder for me to hav an orgasm during ...
A. 18 August 2009: Oh! your post said 13-15 I assumed you were around 13. Which was a bit of a shock LOL.... (read in full...)
Why do I burn after sex?
Q. I'm 16 and ii been haveing sex with my boyfriend WITHOUT a condom and we have sex 10 times a day so i was wondering why my pravit part burns after we finish ???...
A. 18 August 2009: Your wondering why your private parts hurt so much?
"10 times a day" would be the answer honey. Your body cannot take it, and you could also have given yourself thrush. ... (read in full...)
Am I out of order for not wanting him to be around these strippers all the time?
Q. So, My boyfriend owns a strip club. It may sound sleazy but he actually took it over after his brother that owned it died and it does make a lot of money so I would not want to ask him not to give that up. and I actually met him working as a ...
A. 18 August 2009: Hi,
You came from this world, so you know the downfalls. You like the money but you dont like the life anymore?
It doesnt sound like he wants to move on and drop the old lifestyle, so you either "put up, or shut up" I'm affraid.
Or you could le... (read in full...)
Will using a vibrator make it harder for me to orgasm during sex?
Q. okay so i use a back masager or idk but it just vibrates but anyways i use that to have orgasms i put it right on my clit i dont move it around or anything i jus set it there..im just wondering can that make it harder for me to hav an orgasm during ...
A. 18 August 2009: God almighty! When I was 13 all I could think of doing, was being able to jump the big brook in the park. Times have changed obviously!... (read in full...)
Should I continue to confide in my sister?
Q. I think my sister has seriously thought about killing my husband. My husband is not a good person, and the more i confide in her, i think it just makes her angerier, and if he was gone it really would be better for me and the children. He isn't ...
A. 18 August 2009: If you seriously think she would kill him, then perhaps you shouldnt tell her. He sounds awfull, so make plans to get away as soon as you can. Your sister wont be much help to you in prison will she?
XXXX... (read in full...)
He seems insensitive - should I dump him?
Q. Hi - I have been with my boyfriend 3 years but I am worrying we are just not compatible because every now and then he says the most insensitive things. Just one example which plays on my mind and still upsets me was before Xmas my 92 year old ...
A. 18 August 2009: YES...He is showing his true colours, and that he thinks more of his life and himself. I wouldnt give him the time of day, because he almost wished your Grandmother dead because it didnt fit in with his plans.
My guess is though, that you wont ditc... (read in full...)
My friends make fun of me and call me fat...but I'M NOT FAT!
Q. ok so. Pretty much all of my friends are non stop making fun of me for being fat. BUT IM NOT FAT! When im not there they talk about how fat i am and draw pictures of how fat i am. dont say theyre jealous cus theyre all skinnier than me. but im still ...
A. 9 July 2009: They dont sound like friends to me, I would ditch them right away.
And NO your not fat.
XX... (read in full...)
Gaga for Lady Gaga!
Q. My husband has become completely obsessed with Lady GaGa. I mean obsessed!! On the computer are hundreds of pictures and files about her, and even emails arranging to meet with her! We barely have sex anymore, because he feels I'm not enough ...
A. 9 July 2009: Oh well that's constructive!!! Idiot.... (read in full...)
How can I help my best friend?
Q. Ok my Best friend in the whole wide world i knew her since 2nd grade she is 2 months odlder than me and he is into drugs and sex she has pretty big boobs(double d) and that is why alot of the guys she dates (wich most of them are 17-20)like her and ...
A. 9 July 2009: Hi,
She sounds like she has gone on a self destruct mission. There will always be a problem at the back of this somewhere, it could be her parents.
Telling her she will die, and all the other stuff you are saying wont help, believe me I know. It... (read in full...)
Gaga for Lady Gaga!
Q. My husband has become completely obsessed with Lady GaGa. I mean obsessed!! On the computer are hundreds of pictures and files about her, and even emails arranging to meet with her! We barely have sex anymore, because he feels I'm not enough ...
A. 9 July 2009: Hi,
I think the only one thats Ga-Ga is your husband. Has he lost the plot?
I thought this was quite funny, but if you are serious it must be very distressing for you. You know he obviously must be lying dont you?
I really dont know what to tell... (read in full...)
Would-be 2 year anniversary coming up with my ex and I'm not coping!
Q. What would have been my two year anniversary with my ex is this sunday and Ive been so upset all week. We broke up for good in February after going back and forth for a while. We cut all contact four days after my birthday and I havent spoken t...
A. 19 May 2009: Honey!! some things are just not meant to be. No matter how badly we want them.
The best thing you can do is to stop sitting waiting for him to change his mind, because he probably wont. I know its hard for you, but you have to move on. If it was ... (read in full...)
I'm not gay but I like the idea of it!
Q. hi ppl, im straight and have a gf, but i like this show i watch and its kinda guy on guy relationship show aimed at teenage girls. i like it cuz its funny and interesting, but when this 1 scene in the first episode where the 2 guys kiss, i just wish ...
A. 1 May 2009: Its hard not to worry about what people will think, but its even harder to live a lie. Its only as complex as you make it, you dont have to choose either one if you dont want to. Life is all about choices, and as long as you dont hurt your G/F by ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend complains I don't tell him enough how I feel about him
Q. I've only been with him for 4 months but he's complaining that he doesn't know if I like him or not and that I don't compliment him or tell him how much I like him. I just got out of a long term relationship and started this one shortly after. I ...
A. 30 April 2009: There is nothing wrong with you, you just want to wait till your sure. He sounds totally insecure with himself, and it will damage your relationship if he carries on. Kelly gave a good answer, saying little things would help and make him feel less ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend broke up with me after I told my mum he is bi-sexual and now I am pregnant!
Q. hi all :) long and complitcated story so bear with me okies i have been with my bf for 7 months and i recently found out he is bi-sexual.he hasnt told any of his family about it but i have told my mum and she said that she was going to tell hi...
A. 30 April 2009: What exactlly has it got to do with your Mum if he is BI or not. And how could you have betrayed him like that. I have to say I'm not surprised he finished it honey. What were you thinking??
Of course you should tell him about the baby, he is the ... (read in full...)
Would-be 2 year anniversary coming up with my ex and I'm not coping!
Q. What would have been my two year anniversary with my ex is this sunday and Ive been so upset all week. We broke up for good in February after going back and forth for a while. We cut all contact four days after my birthday and I havent spoken t...
A. 30 April 2009: Hi Honey,
Sorry to hear you are feeling this bad. If I were you, I would suround myself with my friends and go do something fun that you dont normally do. Yes you will be sad, but you will cope so much better with people round you.
Dont give him... (read in full...)
I'm not gay but I like the idea of it!
Q. hi ppl, im straight and have a gf, but i like this show i watch and its kinda guy on guy relationship show aimed at teenage girls. i like it cuz its funny and interesting, but when this 1 scene in the first episode where the 2 guys kiss, i just wish ...
A. 30 April 2009: Mmm I was going to say NO till I read the last part.
Dont know if your actually gay, but you could definatly be BI. Watching a film does not make you gay, but if it goes further and you act on your feelings, then you will have to decide is your G/F ... (read in full...)
Should I call or let it be?
Q. I have been with this guy for a few months. He knows that I wont do anything with him unless I get some kind of commitment but he still can't call himself my b/f because he isn't ready and doesn't want to make promises he can't keep. He did, ...
A. 30 April 2009: Hi Honey,
To expect a guy to commit to you after only a few months, just for sex is a bit unrealistic.
What if he had said to you "Yes I love you! Yes I want to marry you" then you had sex and he didnt call again.
He is trying to be honest, wher... (read in full...)
Husband wants a threesome with me acting as a lesbian..I don't want it1
Q. My Husband wants to experience threesome..... My husband is been forcing me or convincing me to go for threesome with him. His fantasy is to see with with a girl. He wants me to be lesbian and make out with a any girl. I am not just not comfort...
A. 20 April 2009: Oh, blah! blah! blah!, (not you, your husband)
Why do men want this so much? Do us lady's dream of seeing our men done up the pooh box by another man.
Tell him to sod off, and you dont want to do it. Or you will, if you can do a threesome with ano... (read in full...)
Why is my husband stingy with me?
Q. I am married in about a year already. I am in a totaly new place and have known only a couple of friends. I had a job before but I quit when I got married and relocate to my husbands place. I had no jog for almost 8 mos, and now I just started a ...
A. 20 April 2009: OK, right well I have another veiw on this.
You are 29 and he is in his 50's! is it at all possible that he thinks you married him for his money, and that you just want to lay around all day and not work? (I am not saying this is true by the way)... (read in full...)
Very interested in casual sex...what to do?
Q. Iam in love with a woman who seems to be interested in. Since Iam much interested in casual sex, not sure what to do ? every time I touched she didnot say anything nor objected but still Iam afraid to express my feelings Iam in confusion is there ...
A. 20 April 2009: Hi,
Do you mean that you cant have a relationship with this lady? How can you love her but just want casual sex?.
If its just sex you want then tell her thats all you want, but dont tell her you love her. Lady's see sex as meaning somethin... (read in full...)
I live with my boyfriend and every single day I cry!
Q. I live with my boyfriend who I have been with for a year now and every single day I cry. He makes me feel so lonely and unwanted. He never wants to spend any time with me at all, he's always busy on the computer or with his mates and he reckons ...
A. 20 April 2009: Oh my god! cut your loses and RUN. I put up with a man like that for 10 years, thinking all my mates were wrong and that he would get better over time.
Do not waste another moment on this selfish man. He will never change.
XX... (read in full...)
Loving a cheater
Q. Dear Cupid im pregnant and love my boyfriend very much but the thing is he is cheating on me, when i ask him about it he always want to put the blame on other people, for instance he would blame me accusing me of listening to my brother's girlfr...
A. 20 April 2009: If you are sure he cheated, then you need time out. He needs to tell you the truth, to put your mind at ease.
You must think about yourself and your baby, dont you deserve a man you can trust? Also if he can cheat on you now, it does not look good... (read in full...)
Curious 14 year old girl ....
Q. hi i'm 14 and have done basically everything sexual. i was just wondering what age people have done different things eg. oral, lost virginity, anal, fantasies etc....
A. 20 April 2009: Maybe its me, but I cant see what it was that Eyes said that upset you so much. I would believe that she meant she thought this was a hoax, which I also thought myself.
You are very aggresive in your reply's, but lets face it you are 14 and aske... (read in full...)
Curious 14 year old girl ....
Q. hi i'm 14 and have done basically everything sexual. i was just wondering what age people have done different things eg. oral, lost virginity, anal, fantasies etc....
A. 14 April 2009: If you really have done all of this already, I am shocked. What are girls going to be like in another 20 years??
... (read in full...)
Mom & boyfriend get along really well..I don't like it!
Q. Hi guys,i need some advice. My mum and my boyfriend get on really well...i know its a good thing but at the same time it irritates the hell out of me! They jokingly gang up on me,taking the p*ss of things that know bother me. What makes it w...
A. 14 April 2009: Hun! Your Mum is the one with the problem, she sounds jelous of her own daughter.
If you want her to stop then stop rising top the bait, its as simple as that. And tell you B/F not to get involved in arguments between you and your Mum or you will... (read in full...)
Curious 14 year old girl ....
Q. hi i'm 14 and have done basically everything sexual. i was just wondering what age people have done different things eg. oral, lost virginity, anal, fantasies etc....
A. 14 April 2009: Erm!! this girl is 14 for god's sake. Or hoax....... (read in full...)
Will the age gap matter, or could it work for us?
Q. hmmm well i feel i had no where else to go so my frustation is here wow where to start , im an older guy and have a much younger girlfriend ,we have been seeing each other for a little over a year, my problem is that im 20years older then her , i ...
A. 14 April 2009: Hey!!!
We all make mistakes. She could have been like that if she had been 30 or 40, its just that you took the chance and unfotunatly it was the wrong decision. Its hard to get over a relationship when it all goes wrong, but you just have to keep... (read in full...)
I can't stop thinking about either of these men
Q. i don't know what to do, sorry if i ramble a bit i think all this detail is important i am single and have really only had two significant boyfriends and i can't seem to move on and be happy. i met Boyfriend 1 in 1995 and went out with him for abo...
A. 7 April 2009: Hi Honey,
Well you said it yourself, your past is a noose around your neck.
You have done so well, and moved on in very positive ways. Trouble is! emotionally, you are still hankering on to what could have been. And here lies the problem.... (read in full...)
My lover is seeing someone else. Should I be worried? Am I being silly giving him grief over this?
Q. My husband has alzheimers. I love him deeply, and I love and care for him. The illness has changed my life forever. I am a young 55 so in the end I met another man and we are lovers. I know it is wrong but I have some happiness here this way. I ...
A. 6 April 2009: Honey! you are in charge of the situation not him. If you really dont want to see him anymore then DONT.
My guess is though that you do want to, and thats why you are not letting go. Its a no way situation, so take your own advice and walk away head... (read in full...)
It's tempting to leave home right now. I can (just about) wait. Have I got it all wrong?
Q. Hello, I'm a 17 year old girl. I live with my parents in a nice house in a small town in England. We have a cat and a goldfish pond. And to be totally honest, I'm gonna go insane if I stay here too much longer. Don't get me wrong - I apprecia...
A. 6 April 2009: Because sweetie!
Most people pay their way in life, by paying rent, mortgages, council tax and all the other stuff that squaters get away with.
Just imagine if you worked hard to buy a house, and while you are away a load of squaters moved in... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 6 April 2009: Glad to hear that, I'm really pleased for you honey. Take care and enjoy your new life...you certainly deserve it.
XXXX... (read in full...)
Not sure what to think
Q. I started seeing a guy about 5 months ago. He is 49 and I am 42. After about 4 months of dating, we decided to move in together. We really seem to communicate and get along very well. We have alot of fun together.Our sex life is very good. The ot...
A. 25 February 2009: Hi there,
Although I can see your point, I do feel that you are getting this way out of proportion.
Ok so most of us go through life knowing that we only like the oposite sex, but thats not always the case (as we all know). As you grow up and go t... (read in full...)
How can I stop getting so angry at him when I'm out drinking with friends?
Q. I have a problem that's really starting to get to me. I'm 19 years old and been with my boyfriend (22) for 7 months now. We have a great relationship, very caring, loving, trusting etc, however our only problem is when I go out drinking... If I'm...
A. 18 February 2009: This is a common problem, and I would bet that most arguements start when people get drunk (especially when your young). Well I say that, but actually when your drunk it doesnt really matter how old you are, you can still act like an idiot.
I woul... (read in full...)
I snogged him and am now worried in case I have HIV!
Q. I am a virgin and worry and stress about things in general, also Stds, I recently met a guy and snogged him loads, I never had sex or anything but now I'm worried I've got HIV cause he isn't a virgin. ...
A. 18 February 2009: I can understand your fears, but if Aids were as easy to catch as you think, most of us would have it.
So dont worry, you are safe. But if you do start to have sex, then make sure that you use precutions (condom's) until you know that you are both... (read in full...)
I've just had sex with my TEACHER!
Q. I've had sex with my teacher last week and I don't know what to do. I can't look him in the eyes any more, I feel ashamed and bad. Can somebody give me an advice what to do?...
A. 16 February 2009: You should not feel ashamed or guilty. Your Teacher should have known better.
Did you do this willingly? or was it forced upon you?
There is a great deal of difference, because if you were willing although he would probably still get struck o... (read in full...)
Online dating!
Q. Has anyone had any good outcomes from online dating? I started online dating in September 2008 and met someone in November, it didn't work out and shes put me off for life :(. She was very insecure and has major ex boyfriend issues, I didn't find ...
A. 16 February 2009: Hi,
One of my dearest friends ended his marriage, it was drawn out and turned very nasty. He then met a local girl that seemed to be OK but it didnt work out for them.
Then he decided to go on-line dating. We all laughed and gave him a hard tim... (read in full...)
My lover is seeing someone else. Should I be worried? Am I being silly giving him grief over this?
Q. My husband has alzheimers. I love him deeply, and I love and care for him. The illness has changed my life forever. I am a young 55 so in the end I met another man and we are lovers. I know it is wrong but I have some happiness here this way. I ...
A. 23 July 2008: God almighty darling! you know how to bring grief into your life dont you?
Sweetheart I understand that you need someone to show you efection, because it must be hell having to care for someone so seriously ill. But dont you have enough trouble with... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 17 July 2008: Sarcy, its only expensive because you both made it that way. I totally understand how upset and bitter you were, but you cannot stop this man from seeing his child, no matter how you feel about it. Because its totally un-fair on your son. You are ... (read in full...)
It's tempting to leave home right now. I can (just about) wait. Have I got it all wrong?
Q. Hello, I'm a 17 year old girl. I live with my parents in a nice house in a small town in England. We have a cat and a goldfish pond. And to be totally honest, I'm gonna go insane if I stay here too much longer. Don't get me wrong - I apprecia...
A. 9 July 2008: Be carefull what you wish for, because not only are you wrong to want to go and live in a squat in the first place, but you are also putting your life in danger even if you cant see it. You say that you love your B/F to bits, imagine if he just ... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 2 May 2008: Uncle Phil is right babe!! dont hang it out anymore than you have to. Except he is gone and have a good cry, but for goodness sake dont let those solicitors have any more of your money. Even if they get him to admit he is the biggest ar**hole in the ... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 1 May 2008: Honey!! I cant believe that you called him. Its so obvious that he doesnt want anything to do with you, why keep hurting yourself. You know deep down that the only reason you called him was to get him to respond to you!! I dont know why you bother? ... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 14 April 2008: I kind of agree with the last poster. Solicitors will do anything to earn some more out of the poor sod going through this pain.
Really it doesnt matter what you divorce him for, its not as if he will have lying cheating sh** across his head. No b... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 10 March 2008: I wish I could give you a hug, I knew you would get there in the end.
Hip Hip Horah XXXXXX... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 5 March 2008: Thank God!!! you are actually staring to fight this man back. I can also tell you why he cant look you in the face, it's guilt nothing else. For whatever reason he has for his actions, does not mean you have to take it laying down.
Go for what... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 1 March 2008: Hi Honey,
Reading your post, I can see that you have still got extremely strong feelings for this man. I know that its hard to let go of any hope, but I think that your husband has proved over and over again that you have no option. He has move... (read in full...)
Will the age gap matter, or could it work for us?
Q. hmmm well i feel i had no where else to go so my frustation is here wow where to start , im an older guy and have a much younger girlfriend ,we have been seeing each other for a little over a year, my problem is that im 20years older then her , i ...
A. 4 February 2008: Hi,
You already know that you will have trouble, and of course people will make asumptions and stare a bit, probably out of jealousy mostly from the men.
But when it comes down to it! why should you care about what people think. If you love eac... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 13 November 2007: Hiya!
I am so pleased for you, your sounding so much better, and a hell of a lot more positive. Good for you.
Its so nice when you try and help someone and they feel like there is no light at the end of the tunnel, and then they begin to see that... (read in full...)
My husband is with another woman but I want him back! What can I do to leave him alone and calm down? Help!
Q. Hi there, I wonder if anyone out there can give me some helpful advice. I have been married for 14 years and we have one son aged 10. My husband has always been a bit moody but has a City job and always worked very long hours. Since November...
A. 20 September 2007: Hi,
I have been sitting reading what has happened to you with a lump in my throat. Its so sad when you are in love with someone who falls for someone else. I should know this has happened to me.
But surely by now you can see that the only time he ... (read in full...)
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