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I hate my course and I am homesick, but my family have invested a lot of money into this! What should I do?

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Question - (30 March 2011) 6 Answers - (Newest, 21 April 2011)
A female Canada age 36-40, *aina writes:

i came to new zealand for my higher studies. My aim was to study while doing a part time job so that i can find next year's tuition fee. Yet things are worse than i thought than it would be. I could not find a job yet. goods are very costly here and i have to pay a rental too. my family cannot afford this any longer. In the meantime I have a terrible homesickness too. furthermore, the course is much more different than i expected. I chose graphic design, but i am compelled to write essays, do research etc. which i hate. I really hate this course now. My father took a loan to send me here as i insisted him. he has spent a lot of money. I feel like going home back.it will at least save next year's course fee. what should i do? please help me

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A female reader, taina Canada +, writes (21 April 2011):

taina is verified as being by the original poster of the question

hmmmmm..........i still have the same problem. i could not find a job to earn my next year's tuition fee. i feel like going home whatever would be the next. everything has gone wrong for me. i am frustrated. day by day my bank account is getting empty. shall i go back home??

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A female reader, taina Canada +, writes (1 April 2011):

taina is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you very much for your help. I think I should be more responsible than this. i will need your help even later on. Thanks again.

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A female reader, jonas Singapore +, writes (30 March 2011):

jonas agony auntIf I'm you, I would take whatever shit it is, bear with it and remember why I wanted to be there in the first place and time will pass soon. When you graduate, your parents will be proud of you and you won't let them down. Also you have achieved something for yourself.

You can do it. If you think you can.

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A female reader, jonas Singapore +, writes (30 March 2011):

jonas agony auntYou're not young honestly and you didn't even bother to do your homework. I'm sorry if I sound harsh but to get your parents to get a loan to put you here, and now you want to tell him that you want out because it wasn't what you wanted.

Everywhere you go, every job you undertake and every course you study, there's bound to be things you have to do but you don't enjoy doing them. Does it mean that you should just quit, leave it to someone else or sit on it? Learning more, doing more tasks won't kill. I find it strange for a 30 something that you have a mentality of a teenager or an early 20s because at your age, you still need your parents to finance you a loan for your studies and now you're saying your parents can't afford your expenses and livelihood. Don't you know that when you study abroad, you gotta pay for rental, food and utilities or else you save cost by sharing with friends (if you have) and take turns to cook? Didn't you have things figured out?

You could still do part time job when you're studying, I'm sure. Even if you have to wait on tables to provide for your own expenses, remember it was you who wanted to be there in the first place and your parents helped you out but you can't possibly expect them to pay for you all the pay. Pls be responsible for yourself, I believe your parents are of a certain age and they have their own family to support since you're studying and not contributing to the expenses of the family.

If I'm you, I would take whatever shit it is, rememb

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (30 March 2011):

TELLULAH agony auntHi,

It sounds like your father has made a great sacrifice to send you there.

Is there no way you could talk to your tutor and explain how hard you are finding this? Maybe they can suggest some other options, rather than giving up and letting your parents down.

I understand how difficult it is, but it’s a small amount of time from your life, that could benefit you massively in the future.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

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A male reader, jayokayo Ireland +, writes (30 March 2011):

jayokayo agony auntstick with the course, even though you hate it now but at the end of the course you will have achieved a skill and qualification that in turn will give you a much better chance at getting a job in graphic design and you can then progress to becoming a fairly decently paid graphics designer. but remember if you finish the course you will also be rewarding your farther by doing so. sometimes we have to sail through rough waters to get to where we are going.

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