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*V1 agony aunt

*V1

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*V1's profile:

Hi! My name is Devin, but my friends call me DV1. I currently live in Pennsylvania, USA. I'm currently in a serious relationship, and I've found that special someone... I've been in and out of relationships for many years. I've been lied to, cheated on, and lost friendships over relationships. I've found that I've taken many lessons from my experiences, and I want to use those experiences to help others. I'm just your average, run-of-the-mill guy, who sees himself as a hopeless romantic of sorts. I'm just lucky that I've found that special someone who doesn't get involved in drama, and just wants me for me. I want to help others find someone, or stay with someone who makes them feel appreciated. If I can cause at least one person on this planet to find or hold onto happiness, then my job here is done.

Best wishes,

DV1

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My wife got pregnant by her lover and had a secret abortion!

Q.   This is difficult but I will just say it. My wife had an affair with a person I considered my friend and got pregnant. She made arrangements with her lover (also married) and had a secret abortion one year ago. We have been married for 6 years and ...

A.   21 August 2013: Do right by your husband and give him the divorce that he deserves. Let him find happiness. There's going to be someone out there who respects and values him. That person isn't, and can never be, you. ... (read in full...)

Can a man who is willing to cheat on his wife ever be faithful?

Q.   Please help me. I have been married for 12 years. I love my husband like a dear friend, but I have never been in love with him. We have been to counseling and I have even told him that when we married I was in a bad place and I am not sure I ...

A.   21 August 2013: He can't be faithful, and neither can you. You both sound perfect for each other, because you'll both cheat on each other. The best thing would be to let you husband find an amazing woman who isn't you first. He definitely deserves that for having ... (read in full...)

MY girlfriend lied to me, we broke up and now everything is a mess

Q.   Hi in need of help I have been going out with my girlfriend for 3 and a half years. 10 days ago I had found out she had been lying to me. She had been going out with another guy and hiding it from me. It started out one day when I logged into Fac...

A.   21 August 2013: She's trash. Move on to someone better.... (read in full...)

What is the problem with me dating two or three ladies at the same time?

Q.   I would like to know from fellow Cupid reader As a man is there any problem when I get married to two or three wife, what about dating two or three ladies is there any problem. Please help, I need to understand this better ...

A.   21 August 2013: It's perfectly acceptable. Dating doesn't mean exclusivity... ... (read in full...)

My married man is too busy for me but I don't want to let him go!

Q.   Im in love with a married guy, 6years older than me. He lives about a 5hour drive away from me and he comes once or twice a month to oversee his projects (he's a building contractor). Last weekend was a long weekend and we chilled from thurs to ...

A.   21 August 2013: Step 1) Go Home. Step 2) Look in the mirror Step 3) Watch sappy movie about two people in love Step 4) Take a sledgehammer to a tv Step 5) Realize that's what you're doing to two people's marriage. Step 6) Move on and get help with your probl... (read in full...)

Cheated on my boyfriend last night and feel so guilty! Should I tell him?

Q.   I went out last night and got really drunk. A guy grabbed me and started kissing me and feeling me up and without thinking I started kissing him back. Then he said he would help to get me home safely but he got out the taxi too and we ended up ...

A.   21 August 2013: I'm going to keep this short and sweet. You are a liar. Period. You do not love your boyfriend, or you wouldn't have done what you did, nor would you have accepted what he brought home. He sounds like a good person. Let him go be happy with s... (read in full...)

My daughter was cheating on her fiance with her best friend's father. How do I contain this situation?

Q.   My 27 yr old daughter has recently admitted to me she's been cheating on her fiance with her best friend's dad, and she's thinking about ditching her fiance and marrying her best friend's dad. She admitted she was discreet about the affair. I am...

A.   21 August 2013: I wouldn't worry about it. Your daughter is fine with destroying lives, so you have to let the destruction play out.You do have the right to distance yourself from her after the dust has settled... Your daughter has become a monster that could ... (read in full...)

Ex initiated contact. I thought I'm over him, but now I can't stick to my guns.

Q.   This is my last post. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-do-i-still-feel-sad-miss-him.html So the last time I talked to my ex, he said he will marry me if I fly to him tomorrow. He said he's not over me. I asked why he didn't wish me happy bir...

A.   21 August 2013: It sounds like you guys definitely aren't made for each other. ... (read in full...)

I cheated with my ex. How do I make it up to my b/f?

Q.   I cheated on my boyfriend yesterday with one of my ex. I love my current boyfriend and i couldn't get away with it. I know it sounds bitchy and i know cheating is voluntary and all that shit, but i truely feel guilty and regretted. I wanna make up ...

A.   28 July 2013: Let him go be happy with someone else. You don't respect him at all, and aren't ready to be in a relationship. That's the best way for him to deal with it. You see, if he forgave you, in your subconscious, you'd lose respect for him as a man, more ... (read in full...)

How to win a mind game( push/pull game) at work place?

Q.   Hi. I am wondering if someone could tell me how to win a mind game ( push/ pull game) a coworker guy is playing on me? Is there really any way to win this game as a girl. Thanks for all the help. ...

A.   13 July 2013: You're a little old to be playing high school games, aren't you? ... (read in full...)

Does this message mean I'm dumped? Help!

Q.   Me and my bf have been arguing ALOT and we had a huge row because he has no time too see me this morning he said 'Right now I am screaming at my phone because I can't put into text what I want to say in retaliation and so it doesn't ruin your day, I ...

A.   12 July 2013: You don't say anything. Just go about your business and live your life. Don't stop your life for anyone ... (read in full...)

For the men who use porn, why don't you think of your girlfriend when masturbating?

Q.   I'm not sure if this has been asked before but here goes those men who use porn when they have a girlfriend, why don't you think of your girlfriend when masturbating? Surely you find them the most attractive so what's it all about, we need this ...

A.   12 July 2013: Because we sometimes need to have a fantasy life. It's normal. It also teaches us techniques to use with our partners.... (read in full...)

My ex dumped me and hasn't been in touch since, but I miss him and want to contact him

Q.   I was with my ex for four years. He dumped me two months ago. I was mad and hated him the first month, but I started missing him like crazy recently. He never contacted me after the break up, never asked what I'm up to or how I am. I don't have the ...

A.   12 July 2013: Silence is golden. ... (read in full...)

In a relationship with a married man for 7 years .... Is it true love or am I kidding myself?

Q.   I am in love with a married man and his wife knew about us. His son knows too but did not believe it is true. My relationship with this married man is still on going till this date and we could not stop this relationship. We have been together...

A.   12 July 2013: Honest answer? You're kidding yourself. Move on. ... (read in full...)

Do I keep fighting for love or pull back?

Q.   My 9 year relationship with my boyfriend just ended 6 weeks ago. The first 5 years were great. The last 4, not so great. I gained a lot of weight and pushed him away. Wouldn't have sex with him. Wouldn't even let him touch me. I was mean to him. I ...

A.   12 July 2013: I can't believe the responses to this are so long. You guys are now officially friends with benefits, he doesn't respect you, and you're never winning him back. Period. Don't give the girl false hope. It's over. There, I said it. ... (read in full...)

LDR ex dumped me without an explanation and it really bothers me

Q.   My ex of 5 years dumped me without any explanation. We were in a long distance relationship. He still said he loved me and missed me a month before he broke up with me. I have no idea why he would change so st. He never contacted me after the ...

A.   12 July 2013: I did an LDR. It was killer hard. I don't recommend it. ... (read in full...)

My online guy is giving me the silent treatment

Q.   Hi, Guy’s I hope you can help. I met a guy online. We have been talking for two months now. He asked me if we could become exclusive since we got along so well. I said yes. We haven’t met yet because he lives long distance. I have asked hi...

A.   12 July 2013: He's crazy. Moving on... ... (read in full...)

My ex and I spent a night together and now he says he doesn't want to get back together

Q.   My ex split up with me 3months ago and I've found it really hard to get over it! I have tried to get in touch with him a few times and he hasn't got back in touch with me. A few days ago and he finally spoke to me. I asked if we could meet up as ...

A.   12 July 2013: You don't understand why he acted like that? Really, please say that you're not serious. He wanted to get in your pants. You were a one night stand, and he had you wrapped around his finger. He told you what you wanted to hear, and you bought it, ... (read in full...)

Can a married man love his wife and mistress at the same time?

Q.   Can a married man love his wife and mistress at the same time?...

A.   12 July 2013: It's possible to love two people. What's sad is that both women are with a person who's really selfish and really ugly inside.... (read in full...)

Why do I care what my terrible ex does?

Q.   my ex boyfriend was horrible and a complete psycho who.locked me in rooms and constantly accused me of cheating. He was mean and a little bit horrible about my children. I split up with him and I dont understand why I look at his facebook account, ...

A.   12 July 2013: Because she has what you didn't -- his trust. Not saying that you did anything wrong, but regardless, that's your answer. ... (read in full...)

He just doesn't understand what I'm going through.

Q.   Hello, Me and my boyfriend were together for nearly two years. We broke up for about a month and are now thinking of giving it another go. I found out a few days ago that he has been sleeping with another girl since we broke up. It broke my h...

A.   12 July 2013: Let me get this straight: 1)You say that you know that what he does when he is single is his business. 2)Then you say that he's supposed to feel inclined to help you get over the fact that he's sleeping with someone else while you two aren't e... (read in full...)

My boyfriends brothers girlfriend won't stop flirting with my boyfriend

Q.   I caught My boyfriends brothers girlfriend seducing my boyfriend I confronted him we got into a whole fight over it. He denied it months passed before running into each other and now my boyfriend seems to be the one who seems like he is going an ...

A.   12 July 2013: I'd have a sitdown with everyone at this point... ... (read in full...)

How to win a mind game( push/pull game) at work place?

Q.   Hi. I am wondering if someone could tell me how to win a mind game ( push/ pull game) a coworker guy is playing on me? Is there really any way to win this game as a girl. Thanks for all the help. ...

A.   12 July 2013: I wouldn't even get involved in games. You're in a professional environment, and all you're going to do is make yourself look like an ass in front of your boss, i.e. the guy signing your paychecks... Forget about the other guy.... (read in full...)

If your partner has an emergency and you share a lease, would you charge them for rent?

Q.   My live in boyfriend and me got an apartment in march I paid the first month and him the deposit, a month into the lease I had to leave town because of a medical emergency where my sister's heart condition became worse and she needed surgery. Since ...

A.   12 July 2013: Maybe you guys just aren't right for each other. If he's as controlling as you say, that should be enough for you to walk away... ... (read in full...)

Does guy from work want something to happen between us all?

Q.   Well I seem to have got myself into an interesting situation to say the least. Last year I met a guy at work,I'll call him Sam, well we became friends chatting to each other at work but no contact outside if it, he flirted often with me and one day ...

A.   11 July 2013: I would go out to a public place, and bring your partner in tow.... (read in full...)

How can I get my son's father to see him more often??

Q.   I've been practically begging my son's father to see him more often/call/anything-to no avail. He treats me like I'm nagging and then accuses me of making it sound like he doesn't love or care about his son. He sees him about twice a month. We...

A.   11 July 2013: Ok, now it's truth time ladies and gentleman: Your question, reworded in basic terms: Q: How can I make a guy do something. A: You can't. ... (read in full...)

Why is my fiancé suddenly looking at porn?

Q.   I have just found out that my fiance has been on a porn site. I am worried he is getting fed up of me. He has always said that he hasn't looked at porn since he has been with me (3 years now) so why now all of a sudden? Any advice please?...

A.   11 July 2013: You're being extremely insecure. He's probably learning stuff that he can take into your relationship. If anything, it's going to make your sex life better. Plus, it's a way that he can get variety without cheating. Sometimes guys have to have a ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend gives me butterflies, but I'm not crazy about what he's wearing... how can I focus on the less superficial stuff?

Q.   Hey everyone, I know I would be judged for this and be called superficial but I really need some input/advise on my situation.. I am seeing this guy for a little over 3 months, he is head over heels in love with me,compliments me a lot, he is very ...

A.   11 July 2013: You're not in love with him. You're not even attracted to him. You're attracted to the idea of being in a relationship with someone. Let him go be happy.... (read in full...)

Are they my real friends? I can't even trust to tell them my relationship which I am so happy in?

Q.   My friends hurt me sometimes but i'm afraid to let go because I dont know are they my friends? Are they my real friends? What is your opinion.? So I am in this group of 6 girls. I'm 18 and they are 16 and 17 year olds. I started school late and ...

A.   11 July 2013: You can't let people define who you are. If you're happy with your family and your boyfriend, who are they to ruin that? If they're actually your friends, they'd be happy with whatever you want to do with your life.... (read in full...)

I don`t want to cheat but I`d like some affection from my friend

Q.   Ok heres the dilema, I'm married and have 2 kids. Years ago I met a guy who totally blew my world away, we only saw each other for a short time and were never intimate sexually. I had to break it off because my ex wanted me back in my life and ...

A.   11 July 2013: You're already emotionally cheating. Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, your husband is grumpy because you don't respect him? P.S. Your concept of what you think is cheating is entirely skewed... ... (read in full...)

Is there really such thing as a psychic?

Q.   Is there really such thing as a psychic? Ok, strange question, but please read. I'm 26 and a mother of one. I have a degree in genetics and I'm a secondary (high) school science teacher, so I'm slightly skeptical of all the supernatura...

A.   11 July 2013: Is there such thing as a psychic? Nobody on this planet has that answer. Only time will tell. ... (read in full...)

How to help my depressed boyfriend and our sex life?

Q.   My boyfriend of 8 months has depression and erectile dysfunction. He had problems with erectile dysfunction that was quite mild our whole relationship but we still had a good sex life. But now that hes depressed as well, he never wants to have sex ...

A.   11 July 2013: It sounds like he's really in love with you, but at the same time, doesn't feel like he deserves you. It means that he respects the hell out of you, a lot more than the other girls that he's been with, and that he's really scared of screwing ... (read in full...)

Should we go seek counseling or it just makes no sense ? I found out he was cheating while I was pregnant

Q.   how to deal with this situation ...had a baby for the man that i love dearly on October 1st of last year we were going through alot of problems which i had already made up my mind to deal with whatever problems we may encounter during our life ...

A.   11 July 2013: He cheated, and is probably lying about a lot more than that. Just sayin'. Time to dump his ass. ... (read in full...)

Which path to follow.....your head or your heart?

Q.   How do you know whether to follow your head or your heart? I'm a 23 year old gal, I like this girl I met a few weeks ago she seems cool, don't know much about her but my head tells me she seems nice, we joke together and flirt a bit and she's ho...

A.   11 July 2013: Why not just go out on a few dates to figure out what you're really looking for? Maybe take some you time and figure out what you want out of your life, and what kind of girl will by your side while you try and get there... ... (read in full...)

He's too hairy for me! How do I tell him without hurting his feelings?

Q.   dear cupid, i had just went on a first date with this guy hes really sweet and really funny we get along great. he says hes very uncomfortable with his body, i told him he has a great body type and he asks me " are you sure?" and i said yes we start ...

A.   11 July 2013: Guys are generally cool about stuff like that. We're generally willing to compromise on the hair thing, as long as it's in normal places... ... (read in full...)

One night he got up and left and I never saw it coming, how do I get over him when we work together at the weekend?

Q.   I need help! Just over a month ago my boyfriend who I had been with for ten months one night just got up and left! He came back the next day saying how sorry he was we spent the day together we slept together and then the next day... He had gone ...

A.   11 July 2013: Basically, in short and in truth, it's over. In geek terms: "You've got to take a shot to the face" and move on. ... (read in full...)

If your partner has an emergency and you share a lease, would you charge them for rent?

Q.   My live in boyfriend and me got an apartment in march I paid the first month and him the deposit, a month into the lease I had to leave town because of a medical emergency where my sister's heart condition became worse and she needed surgery. Since ...

A.   11 July 2013: I think that it's ridiculous to say that she can't count on him in an emergency. Different emergencies exist. Why would you be so idiotic as to sign a lease for an apartment, then go away and expect not to hold up the contract that YOU signed. ... (read in full...)

He's my first, I'm not his. I find myself wishing I'd done more before I met him

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend now for 6 months. Prior to getting closer, he explained early on that he's had 2 sexual encounters. One was oral (received/given) and the other was actual sex. He doesn't count it as real sex because the girl got on top ...

A.   11 July 2013: You're not being selfish. You're just obsessing over something incredibly ridiculous. Why not just enjoy the relationship that you're in and the experiences that you're having together. You both have a different past, but what should count is the ... (read in full...)

In love with my brother's girlfriend! every hug is agony for me

Q.   Well, I thank I'm falling in love with my brother's Girl friend or do I just to much about her. I don't know why this is happening because, well she has hanged out more with my little brother, and my older brother more then we have hung out before ...

A.   11 July 2013: Find someone else. It's your brother's girl. ... (read in full...)

Why does my long distance girlfriend still have and know my phone number?!?

Q.   Just wondering why my ex ldr still has my phone number I mean she does not respond back to me and ect just wondering why she would still have it even though she wanted to move on and changed her phone number 5 or 6 times all ready but I still have ...

A.   11 July 2013: I'm not sure how to answer this one except to say: "Move on".... (read in full...)

One night he got up and left and I never saw it coming, how do I get over him when we work together at the weekend?

Q.   I need help! Just over a month ago my boyfriend who I had been with for ten months one night just got up and left! He came back the next day saying how sorry he was we spent the day together we slept together and then the next day... He had gone ...

A.   10 July 2013: You forget him and move on. It gets easier with each passing day. ... (read in full...)

One night he got up and left and I never saw it coming, how do I get over him when we work together at the weekend?

Q.   I need help! Just over a month ago my boyfriend who I had been with for ten months one night just got up and left! He came back the next day saying how sorry he was we spent the day together we slept together and then the next day... He had gone ...

A.   9 July 2013: He's a flake. A lot of people tend to be like that nowadays. A lot of people just seem to not know what they want. Be cordial and/or professional and don't acknowledge anything personal. If it gets out of hand, talk to your boss. End of story. ... (read in full...)

Does this message mean I'm dumped? Help!

Q.   Me and my bf have been arguing ALOT and we had a huge row because he has no time too see me this morning he said 'Right now I am screaming at my phone because I can't put into text what I want to say in retaliation and so it doesn't ruin your day, I ...

A.   7 July 2013: Yes, it means you guys are done. Moving on... ... (read in full...)

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