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| | LazyGuy's profile:I am 37 year old dutch male who used to think he was the mythical "nice guy" but realized that he really was just to lazy to be bad.
Worked a lot of different jobs, going where-ever the money happens to be and traveled a bit. |
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| Latest articles: Men can't read women
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 March 2008: Slashdot is a geek site focussing mostly on tech. Relationship advice is not something you will find there, but this story just has to be mentioned. http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/03/30/0028211 http://www.livescience.co...
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He got caught masturbating in a shopping centre!!
Q. My b/f often masturbates to porn, i'm o.k with this and sometimes we watch it together. Anyhow last week he got caught masterbating in a shopping centre, now i think maybe i shouldn't have encouraged him. What do you think?...
A. 9 May 2008: Right because masturbating in your own home is the same as jerking off in a shopping center.
Be careful, if you had sex with him, you might encourage him to rape someone...
This is silly, you are not to blame. If all men who watch porn mastu... (read in full...)
I'm undecided - should I give in to my brother's urges and have sex with him?
Q. My brother trying to seduce me. He's been trying for a long time, from time to time he was making a move on me, but now I think he's serious. When we were in early teens (13-15) we already had a kind of sexual relationship with him - we've been tou...
A. 8 May 2008: Freedom, it is a difficult thing to believe in. If you believe people should be free then taboos like incest can't really exist. After all, who has the right to tell two adults what they can or cannot do privately?
Incest is a complex issue, f... (read in full...)
Do internet porn sites charge you without warning and if so will they be itemised on Dad's bill?-help!
Q. Help me!! I know this sounds really pathetic but I'm really concerned. I'm 21 and recently discovered that porn really does it for me. I have been visiting porn sites for the last month. However it only dawned on me this evening that maybe Will it ...
A. 7 May 2008: It sounds like you got "cable" this means the internet comes over the same wire as your television signal, easy to check by looking where the wire goes into the wall.
If it is cable, you got nothing to worry about.
Wireless is the same, basica... (read in full...)
What is the strangest place to have sex?
Q. Sorry for all the questions on here but I enjoy hearing everyone's comments on things, it makes you look at everything so much differently. The world is so diverse it is amazing. But as for my question. Where is the wierdest place any of you...
A. 6 May 2008: In her sisters bed... don't ask.... (read in full...)
Do internet porn sites charge you without warning and if so will they be itemised on Dad's bill?-help!
Q. Help me!! I know this sounds really pathetic but I'm really concerned. I'm 21 and recently discovered that porn really does it for me. I have been visiting porn sites for the last month. However it only dawned on me this evening that maybe Will it ...
A. 6 May 2008: You are still on dial-up in 2008?
As a geek, that sounds like a far more serious problem then anything else.
If you are using ADSL or Cable then there is no way for a dialer to work which is what I think you are worried about.
There ... (read in full...)
I invited my father to my house to support him through his recovery, only I just discovered he watches child porn! What should my next steps be??
Q. Where to start... My father had a heart attack nearly a year ago, as he was living on his own I demanded he moved in with me, my partner and our young daughter, until he made a complete recovery. He moved in, retired from his job, moved out his r...
A. 6 May 2008: First off, be sure they files in question are indeed real media files and not just names.
P2P (file sharing) applications often contain fake files and this includes child porn. Just a bunch of file names isn't proof.
If they are child porn y... (read in full...)
I'm too embarrassed to buy a dildo so what do I do?
Q. ok to tell you the truth i masturbate regularly but now its starting to not feel good and im not getting any pleasure from it im too embarrassed and shy to buy a dildo what should i do?...
A. 6 May 2008: Look around, there are places that aren't as seedy as a porn store that sell them, or get them over the internet.
If that is not an option, a substitute might be the Gilette razor for men with battery. It has a smallish round handle. It is water... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says there are hotter girls than me. How can I feel better about myself now?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been going through a rough patch lately... I asked him if he was still with me just because of the sex (because it seems it's the time he enjoys the most when he's with me), so he said: "Look, there are hotter girls tha...
A. 6 May 2008: He thought he was being nice but thinking is not something men do well especially when it comes to what to say to a woman.
He meant it as a declaration of love, that he is not just with your for your body and the use of it, but for you, the pers... (read in full...)
Older men always buy me drinks or ask me out but people my age don't seem that fussed. What's the deal?
Q. Whenever people are interested in me, they are always at least 10 years older than me. I can never get anybody who is the same age as me. I look quite young too, everyone thinks I'm about 18 when I'm 23. I was just wondering what men my age are ...
A. 6 May 2008: Well two things might be happening. First, are you hanging out in the wrong areas? I a 15 years older then you and most certainly would not be hanging around in the same places as men your age. In short, how could an old man like me buy you a drink ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my mom what my dad is really like?
Q. I'll try and be brief and to the point. My parents separated when I was nearly 8, after that I'd go to my dad's every other weekend for visits. To give some idea of this man, he was an alcoholic, he was psychotic, paranoid, extremely pessim...
A. 6 May 2008: There really is not nice way to say it, but your mother sounds insane and you are asking how to tell her something even sane people would have a hard time dealing with?
How would I tell you a very serious piece of news like say your husband ... (read in full...)
I told my man I love him, and now he doesn't want me
Q. Things started going wrong when i told my man i love him.......he now says he doesn't want to be with me anymore and I'm left wondering why and what to do. Can you help me understand this please....
A. 6 May 2008: I presume you mean man as in boyfriend not husband?
It would seem he wanted a casual relationship, friends with sex if you like.
By confessing your love you made it too deep for him and he wants out for fear of commitment.
As for what to ... (read in full...)
She says I'm all that she is looking for in a guy but that she still doesn't like me "in that way", why?
Q. ok, this is actualy a really odd situation im an incredibley feminine teenager infact im bisewxual (i know that doesnt necessarily make you feminine, i just happen to be) i only actualy have 2 friends in the whole world, and i have had incredibl...
A. 6 May 2008: It is simple, there is a difference between what she thinks she wants and what she really wants.
Nice guys finish last or women want bad boys. A bit simplistic. It could really be as simple as knowing you got to stop smoking because it is bad for ... (read in full...)
Are guys put off dating a woman who's a virgin?
Q. This is a question for the guys. I'm in my early twenties and I'm a virgin. I'm saving myself for the right person. Do men prefer experienced women? Are guys put off dating a woman who's a virgin. What are your views please? thanks alot...
A. 3 May 2008: No.... (read in full...)
She wants to break up because she needs more sex experience..!
Q. HI. Ive been with my girlfriend for over 5 1/2 years. Im only the third person she has slept with. I love her with all my heart but last month she decided to tell me she wanted to spilt up. Apparently she been thinking about it for 3 months but has ...
A. 3 May 2008: Frankly it sounds like she wants out or I am just to old for all this bullshit.
So why the trial seperation? Well that is a bit like saying, "I think I can do better then you but just in case I can't do you mind sticking around".
Tell her she ... (read in full...)
Why couldn't he get it to stay up?
Q. I'm with someone new. I like him, its not all about sex, so this isn't all that important. We tried to have sex the other morning and he couldn't get it to stay up. He said it's not me, but then what is it? ...
A. 3 May 2008: Was it morning wood? That isn't caused by sexual excitement and just goes down on its own. ... (read in full...)
He isn't one to think himself highly enough to pursue a girl?!!
Q. Ok i like this guy and i was talking to his friend and i told him that i liked his friend and that i gave him my number. Well i havent heard from him and been almost a month and we still email each another on myspace when hes on which is veryly ...
A. 3 May 2008: It means he lacks confidence, it takes a lot to approach a girl especially if you been shot down a couple of times. If you never even once had the courage to ask, then it gets even worse over the years.
You gain confidence by dating but to date ... (read in full...)
I get self-conscious about being loud during sex. Is that wierd?
Q. I am not in a relationship right now but a question has been bugging me since my last boyfriend. Everytime we had sex it's like I tried not to be loud. I guess I was self concious about it. Also I didn't want him to see me pleasuring him. I had to ...
A. 3 May 2008: Have you been raised to think that sex is dirty, sinful or that women shouldn't enjoy it?
It sounds like you are ashamed. There isn't any need to, but it is hard to shake our upbringing.
If you been raised this way you have to just keep tellin... (read in full...)
Is it so weird for a girl to date a guy if he's shorter than her?
Q. I want people's opinion on this. Is it weird to like someone who is shorter than me? I'm a girl, he's boy, we're both 15. Some people think it's weird for a girl to be taller then a guy in a relationship. What do you think? (I may date him soon too...
A. 3 May 2008: My relationship is "based" on that. I am short for my country/race (the dutch are the tallest people in the world) and she is tall for race. Together, we fit precisely.
So yeah, I am one of those people who got a hang-up about a girl being ta... (read in full...)
All guys adore me and find me the hottest, but would not approach me...are they totally crazy?!
Q. Well i am 19 years old and i am studying in this highly prestigious university in the United Kingdom. I am the most popular girl in class and my classmates think that i am a stuck up, attitude carrying show off. All this is said behind my back. ...
A. 3 May 2008: As so often, the answer would be obvious if you look at your own question from a different angle, say this question was posted by a guy, would that guy be attractive to you?
For that matter would you believe his description of himself? A walking ... (read in full...)
How can one use somebody for sex and NOT feel guilty??
Q. How do guys (or girls) who use someone for sex, sleep at night? I mean honestly I just dont understand how they can use someone for sex and not feel guilty at all. What makes them think its OK to use someone like that? What goes on in there mind? ...
A. 2 May 2008: Simple, the same way people can rob other people, hurt them etc etc. Some people just don't care about others.
The trick for the rest of us is to learn to spot these people and stay away from them. It ain't that hard, just listen to those around a... (read in full...)
I don't feel like a woman because I have a small chest!
Q. I am 28 years old and am 4'10" and weigh about 95 lbs and my chest is rather small....is that a big deal for men? My husband says he doesn't care and that I'm perfect, but is he telling the truth? He's always told me that he is a "butt" man and I ...
A. 2 May 2008: You know this comes up a lot and just as I went home I was thinking about the question and how the media shows us woman are supposed to be big breasted as small breasted women often claim.
So I looked at mannequins, the puppet kind in shop win... (read in full...)
Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 2 May 2008: There really is no easy answer to this.
The weekend thing is odd but many a convention is held over a weekend so it all depends on what kind of business trip we are talking about.
Her excuse of her going to be busy sounds reasonable BUT t... (read in full...)
Do you like going down on your girl?
Q. One for the guys.. Do you like going down on your girl? I ask because you hear of girls' opinions on fellatio a lot more than you hear of guys' opinions on cunnilingus. So guys, how much do you enjoy performing oral on your girl?...
A. 2 May 2008: What is not to like about making a woman loose it completely?
As for taste, my experience is limited but it really doesn't have that strong a taste. Most women take good care of their hygiene in any case and will not even allow oral if they are... (read in full...)
Anal sex question...any advice?
Q. This is pretty embarassing for me, but..., I want to have anal sex with my bf but I have hemhroids--is it possible to still have a good time? I've been waiting for them to go away but they've been around on and off for about 7 mo. I know, I should c...
A. 2 May 2008: Oh geez. Do you enjoy pain or something?
Ask your doctor to explain what exactly has happened in your ass. Blood vessels have bassicly exploded outwards and are now open and exposed. Do you really think it is a good idea to then shove somethin... (read in full...)
Will anyone want to date this 20 year old virgin?, I'm beginning to think not
Q. I'm nearly 21 years old and I've never been in a relationship with a guy. I've never even been kissed and it's getting thoroughly embarrassing. I feel like I'm missing out on key life experiences. I know 20 is still young, but the thing is I have no ...
A. 2 May 2008: Just enjoy life and try not to become obsessed with this. We all move at different paces and some of us just ain't the type to instantly fall in love or mess around.
On the whole being a virgin is not a bad thing for a woman. What are you missing ... (read in full...)
Has anyone heard of linkng?
Q. What does linking mean? Recently, boys having asking me and my friends to link them and none of us know what they mean? At first, we thought it meant to snog but we are now unsure and we are really confused. Is there anybody who could actual...
A. 1 May 2008: Tsk, must be getting old. Used to mean "send me a link (as in website) to what you are talking about".
... (read in full...)
Am I a slut? I need to know if this is normal for teenagers to do.
Q. when i was 16 years old i dated my brothers friend,i dint like him that much cause he wasnt that gorgeous and i dint like his nature either..he wanted to have sex with me but i dint agree as i said i dint like him..i did not kiss or make out with ...
A. 1 May 2008: So you are a virgin?
Odd way to be a slut.... (read in full...)
He says he really likes me and insists that I do not forget him... but he is in a relationship already!...
Q. there is this guy i really like and he likes me to and was afraid to tell me so and i was supposed to be his girlfriend but this girl ask him to be her boyfriend and he told her yes.. even if he is with her he often told me that he loves me and he ...
A. 1 May 2008: You know what to do. "i told him i will have to stop talkin to him to get him out of my mind and move on with my life"
Your own words, listen to them.
Of course he likes you. To stick around and be his toy. He is either a player and wants... (read in full...)
I found out my boyfriend joined a sex dating site. I don't know what to do.
Q. Hey all, where do i start, well im new to this but just so confused ,feel like i could talk to someone better, if they dont know me, than friends who give advice, not saying that we wont become friends on this site but you'll understand when i say ...
A. 1 May 2008: Since you logged in on the site, find out when he signed up. Most such sites have a way to check the activity of a user, like for instance this site allows you to see all the answers a person posted.
It may be it all happened a long time ago and ... (read in full...)
Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 1 May 2008: Your story certainly would raise a huge red flag for me.
What type of business trip takes 5 days anyway and if she is making a holiday out of it, why doesn't she want you along.
Is she the type to cheat? The flirting might just be the way ... (read in full...)
I don't know if I will ever love. Please help.
Q. hi everyone! i really need your help and i would appreciate it so much if you would answer me!!! first i want to apologize for my language mistakes as i am not a native speaker. i just turned 19 and i'm female. here's my story: i have never been ...
A. 1 May 2008: With 'save' I mean that you can be in love with them without actually having to risk being with them for real.
Your update on your family life makes it pretty clear you are suffering from the effects of an abusive upbringing. No that doesn't ... (read in full...)
Boys and Men...what do you think about teenage lesbians?
Q. Older men..do you think 'Oh she's just a teenager, it's just a phase..she doesn't really know what she wants'? We had to talk about it in class today and it seemed that most boys thought it 'hot'. I know some guys think that, but what do the othe...
A. 1 May 2008: What do you care if you are a lesbian? Men are kinda out of the picture for lesbians, same as gay men don't have to care one bit what women think of them.... (read in full...)
It's the same old routine every time. I need more foreplay.
Q. Whenever i have sex with my bf its always the same routine. i toss him off he fingers me i give him head FOR ages! then he jumps on me and we have sex. And ive tried everything i can but i just cant come straight out with it, i just cant ...
A. 1 May 2008: What exactly is "tossing him off"?
Also, you seem to do it in the wrong order. Blowjob THEN intercourse? Not a recipe for lasting a decent amount of time in my experience.
Turn it around, let him stimulate you right before intercourse , wa... (read in full...)
How do I make ordinary friends without sexual tension getting in the way?
Q. I've never been good at making friends. Naturally I am a bit of a loner and I probably am a bit anti-social but I still do enjoy being social, and would still like to have friends. I have trouble relating well to other females, I am not sure what...
A. 1 May 2008: Could it be you are a tomboy? My own girlfriend is one and I recognize your husbands description.
If this is the case, then I am not surprised you are having some difficulty with friendships because in many ways you are sending the wrong signals.... (read in full...)
I don't know if I will ever love. Please help.
Q. hi everyone! i really need your help and i would appreciate it so much if you would answer me!!! first i want to apologize for my language mistakes as i am not a native speaker. i just turned 19 and i'm female. here's my story: i have never been ...
A. 1 May 2008: A suspicion I got reading your story is confirmed almost as an afterthought at the end. "the fact that i am not close with my dad probably has something to do with the fact i like older men".
What exactly was the relationship with your father. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend comes from an abusive background. Should I be worried if he abuses our cat?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating over a year now and I couldn't be happier with him. But, he comes from an abusive background and that worries me. We have a cat that we bought together. He likes to put her inside the bath tub or shower because he ...
A. 1 May 2008: Not all cats are afraid of water. Turkish van's are famous for liking water and mine for instance enjoys swimming and will do it any chance he has of his own accord.
But yeah, most cats hate water and should be bathed only rarely and even then onl... (read in full...)
The body mass indicator always says I'm overweight. Are they kidding?!?
Q. I have lost quite a bit of weight, but my problem is my body mass index..i'm 5 feet 8 inches and weigh 180 lbs, and really i'm doing good, i don't have that much fat on my body AT ALL. My weight loss goal is 175, so i'm only 5lbs away from my ...
A. 1 May 2008: BMI is not an absolute, it doesn't take into account your build. It is designed to be simple to use, not accurate for everyone.
If they made it accurate for everyone, nobody but medically trained people could use it, defeating its purpose.... (read in full...)
It's really bothered me that he didn't send me even a card on my birthday.
Q. I have been in a long distance relationship for about 4 years now. My question is: Should I expect a B-day gift or something from my b/f? My b-day was on sunday and I was hoping my b/f will send me flowers or a b-day card, but he didn't. This is my ...
A. 1 May 2008: It depends, how is he about his own birthday? If he prefers to keep it quiet or even ignores it altogether then it ain't a big deal.
If he expect a big party and lots of attention for himself but doesn't give any to you then yes, it is a big deal... (read in full...)
What does he really mean when he tells me I'm a good girl?
Q. What's implied when a guy says good girl? He treats me well, we get along and talk alot, but sometimes i get a hint of chauvinism from him. Sometimes he calls me a ''good girl''(eg after or during sex, the 1st time i made a comment that the anal se...
A. 30 April 2008: Eh, how does he say that. Good girl as in your decent/proper/nice or something like that.
Or good girl as in good dog and he pats you on your head and gives you a biscuit?
The way you say it it almost seems like the last way and that should ... (read in full...)
How can I stop my Husband beating me?
Q. How do I stop my husband from beating me all the time? ...
A. 30 April 2008: By not being there.
Nigeria? No idea if it has support for battered wives but in the west I would advice you to seek shelter and inform the police.
Get out of the house and out of the marriage if you can.
If you really can't your only h... (read in full...)
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