| Latest articles: For all women
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 November 2010: Recently, I found this poem by Maya Angelou. I think it pretty well summarizes how women should feel about themselves. Here it is, in case it benefits anyone. PHENOMENAL WOMAN by Maya Angelou Pretty women wonder where my secret lies I'm n...
Just some fun!
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 December 2008: Something one of my aunts sent me: When I was born, the doctor went to the waiting room and told my father: "We did all we could, but he was born alive". My mom didn't know whether she should keep me or the placenta. Since I was born before ...
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Why my girlfriend said she needed a space?
Q. I have been in a relationship with girl who lives in a different city we meet like three times. Most the time we would talk on phone.Last year we had break and then had patch up after three months. Now after six months, she suddenly came up tell me ...
A. 14 July 2010: Maybe she didn't find someone else but apparently she does find that you can't keep her as she wishes. Well, you can't change that, and if you could you shouldn't.
The simple advice is "move on". I know this is difficult. But you can do it.... (read in full...)
Girlfriend or potential, lucrative job?
Q. I love my girlfriend of 1-1/2 years to death (though we've known each other for 11 years), and can't wait to propose to her someday. My girlfriend is extremely attached to me, and whenever I have been away for a few weeks, she gets upset. I...
A. 14 July 2010: You shouldn't have to choose between work and love. In real life you need real jobs to pay very real bills. No one should question that. I suppose your girlfriend is about your age. I am sure she is old enough to understand.
She is graduati... (read in full...)
How far can Christians go sexually without violating our faith?
Q. I'm 17 years old and have been with my bf 6 months. I am a Christian and am unsure how far sexually it is ok to go. He has fingered me and I've given him a handjob but have began to think this is wrong and so my question is, how far, as a Christian, ...
A. 10 July 2010: Christians have an easier time knowing how far they can go without sinning: they can't do anything but kissing and dating. The rest is forbidden, and you know it.
Sorry to say this, but what you're trying to do is stretch the definition of what ... (read in full...)
Do guys ever put women in "the friend zone"?
Q. I'm concerned I've been putting in some male form of the friend zone but don't know. I have been friends with this guy for 2 years. We talk everyday on the phone, he has told me very personal things he doesn't tell anyone else, he has rearrange...
A. 10 July 2010: Disclaimer: I'm good friends with Ask Oldersister and often find her posts very, very good.
I think Oldersister has told you the bare truth. Yes, there are some people we like as friends. It seems to me he wants you for friendship only.
... (read in full...)
Is it okay to have a secret affair, as the sex situation is beyond repair?
Q. I am in a sexless Marriage (for over 3 years of no sex), and believe me I've tried to resolve it. But my wife remains uninterested in sex, and it just seems like we share a house as barely friends. I in the meantime have a very high sex drive, ...
A. 9 July 2010: I fully agree with SillyB, who isn't silly as her name claims.... (read in full...)
My husband is interested in shemales, what can I do?
Q. My husband and I have so much love for each other almost 9 yrs. We are a very loving couple in other people's eyes. However, I found out he is interested in shemale two months ago. Not only spending thousands of money to chat with them and even ...
A. 9 July 2010: I'm sorry to say it this bluntly, but I can't think of a man who takes pills to have erections and is not having sex. Sometimes things are not what they seem to be, but I'm afraid that this time it is pretty much clear.
Since he hasn't been hav... (read in full...)
What should I say to his Mom?
Q. Okay so i dont really know how to ask this question so ill just explain! :)My boyfriend is working offshore right now and he likes to give me money from his check every week maybe like 300 just so i can have money, but i dont have his bank ...
A. 9 July 2010: Difficult situation, from different angles.
At least where I live, if a woman takes my money, a) she's mine, or b) she's someone else's and I'm very stupid. Maybe Mommy wonders whether her dear son is A), B), or C) None of the Above, but Son shou... (read in full...)
Did us cuddling soberly scare him off?
Q. Hello, I'm a twenty one year old in college and I've been having a hard time reading a guy that I'm really into and I'm hoping someone will give me good advice on what I should do next. I'm confused on whether or not this guy has feelings for me or ...
A. 9 July 2010: Question: You say you two had someone else when you met. You broke up with your guy when you realized to what extent you liked Mr. I-will-probably-end-up-there-at-some-point. Does Mr. I-will.... know that? Did he break up with Ms. I-will...? If ... (read in full...)
I really like the comfort of having him around but I just can't handle sleeping next him.
Q. Hello everyone. I've been in my current relationship for about 10 months. We're up to that stage where we're just getting really comfortable with each other and each other's places. The problem is I can't sleep in the same bed with him. When I wa...
A. 9 July 2010: All the help you really need is letting him now why you had to sleep on the couch. That's it. He will understand.... (read in full...)
What are we supposed to do in the Missionary position?
Q. Hello! Just a quick question. How does a woman perform during sex? I know there are various sex positions where the woman is in control for example, when she is on top. However, I am referring to the traditional position of 'Missionary' - I know...
A. 9 July 2010: Janniepeg is right.... (read in full...)
Is this how most guys work after a first date?
Q. Hi, hope you can help me out! A guy I'd been talking to for a few weeks via Facebook asked me on a date which took place last week. We got on really well! I've never experienced a date like it in my life, I felt so relaxed and comfortable in h...
A. 9 July 2010: He could be busy, or he might be trying not to look desperate, or both.
Question, with q: Did you let him see you liked him? If he somewhat got the feeling that you, er, didn't really want to see him again, he may be thinking he should NOT cont... (read in full...)
How do I ignore her tattoo?
Q. Ok, well i have a really strong dislike about tatoos. And my girlfriend agrees with me that they are disrespectful. Well she asked me if it's alright if she gets a tatoo, im am in no way a controlling person. I told her it's fine ill just ignore it. ...
A. 9 July 2010: Just don't focus on it.... (read in full...)
My husband won't go to anger management, is it time to divorce?
Q. My husband gave me an ultimatum last week which was I needed to return home by Thursday otherwise he was going to his scheduled appointment with his attorney to end our marriage. I really need him to go to anger management or something since his ...
A. 8 July 2010: Sounds like it would be a terrible mistake to go back there. Don't do it. It's very sad, but that's how it is.
What guarantee do you have that he will not be violent once you're in the same home again?... (read in full...)
What does his sperm count mean?
Q. me and my partner are both in our mid 20s are trying for a baby but hes been told hes got a border line to low sperm count does this mean we cant have children or do we need to try a bit harder plz plz help ...
A. 6 July 2010: It means it will be more difficult, but not impossible. I actually met a man who didn't use contraception because his sperm count was low, and guess what? One of the willful boys did become a boy.... (read in full...)
Is it better to live on your own or with a friend?
Q. Hi guys, my apologies for this not being a question of love, rather a life matter, but I would really appreciate your advice. I currently live with my sister who just recently got a job and is moving to another country. I now have to decide to ...
A. 6 July 2010: I say, on your own.... (read in full...)
I just want to know what to think....does he care?
Q. This Question is regarding an affair i am having with a married man,no judgements please.This affair has gone on for over 10yrs,we are both in our 60's now all children are grown up and married. What i am trying to work out is does this man have any...
A. 6 July 2010: Perhaps he does care, but I have the feeling that the real question you'd like to ask is whether he will move in with you. It seems he won't. I fail to see why he would stay with his wife. Has he ever told you why he's still with her?... (read in full...)
How to attract men that are not involved?
Q. Hello .... My question is how do you attract a man who is not involved in a relationship? And how do you let one you like but is involved go? We haven't slept together but we've kissed ... I don't want to be the other girl! He keeps approaching me ...
A. 6 July 2010: You might not stop the feeling but you can avoid doing something that will surely cause harm to someone. Most probably, you.... (read in full...)
Met a guy overseas, we've kept in touch, but is he serious?
Q. Sorry if this is a bit long-- So I was studying abroad in Italy this past semester (where most of my family is from, and I am fluent in Italian) and met an Italian man through mutual friends a few weeks before I was due to go home. I actually ended ...
A. 2 July 2010: We can't know if he's serious. He has stayed in touch, but that could mean either thing.
You won't know if he's serious unless you really ask him and spend some more time talking to him and et cetera.... (read in full...)
The only thing that arouses him is thinking about threesomes!
Q. i have been together with my husband for 8 years, married for 2. we have 2 children, 1 from a previous relationship. in the first years of our relationship he suggested a threesome so i tried it, part of me enjoyed it part of me didnt, i used to ...
A. 2 July 2010: So he gets aroused if there is another man, but not another woman. I have bad feelings about it. Maybe it's only me.... (read in full...)
I know that men look at porn so why does he claim not to? I'm not the jealous type.
Q. Why do guys lie about watching porn? My boyfriend and I have been together for several years and at the beginning of our relationship would look at it together quite a lot, usually just for fun (i.e. trying to find the weirdest stuff we could) but ...
A. 29 June 2010: I'm with Celia. If you have no problem with his viewing porn, why is it an issue at all?... (read in full...)
I know that men look at porn so why does he claim not to? I'm not the jealous type.
Q. Why do guys lie about watching porn? My boyfriend and I have been together for several years and at the beginning of our relationship would look at it together quite a lot, usually just for fun (i.e. trying to find the weirdest stuff we could) but ...
A. 28 June 2010: Women are usually sensitive to the fact that their men could watch porn while being in a relationship with them. So he hides it, or so he thinks. Like my sister when she smoked in the bathroom and came out chewing mints. No one knew she smoked, ... (read in full...)
Will breaking up force the issue?
Q. If I break up with my FWB will I stand a better chance of getting him to committ? ...
A. 28 June 2010: Sorry, but most likely the answer is no.
If he really cares about you and breaking up with you would be a huge loss, then he might. But he would resent your forcing him to do it.
If he was comfortable as he was and didn't want anything beyond ... (read in full...)
The only thing that arouses him is thinking about threesomes!
Q. i have been together with my husband for 8 years, married for 2. we have 2 children, 1 from a previous relationship. in the first years of our relationship he suggested a threesome so i tried it, part of me enjoyed it part of me didnt, i used to ...
A. 28 June 2010: Was the threesome with another woman, or with another man? Sorry to ask this question. But I don't need an answer, really. If it was with another man, then he's a closet gay. If it was with another woman, then he wants someone else in his bed, ... (read in full...)
How do guys treat their close female friends over a romantic interest?
Q. Dilema!!! I have a great guy friend and as of late I've been thinking we may be more.....He's bought me gifts, we text A LOT and even until recently he never hugged me when we said goodbye, but the last few times I left he either made the first ...
A. 26 June 2010: It seems to me that he's interested.... (read in full...)
Going commando?
Q. Hey, 25 y.o. straight male here... A strange question really. Hope you can help! Over the years I have found that going commando (wearing no underwear) in jeans is a real turn-on, for both myself and in women. I love the thought that tha...
A. 25 June 2010: I haven't overcome this, because I have never gone commando. The simple thought of hurting the family's Jewels and Hope for The Future with that zipper keeps me from doing it. Have you considered that possibility? I hear it really hurts.... (read in full...)
Amnesia stole four years of my life and what I am learning of my boyfriend now, is not promising.
Q. right this is quite complicated and long so please bear with me i need advice. In April of this year i ended up in hospital having had a seizure, it turned out i had a small blood clot on my brain. the main side effect was that i got retro grade ...
A. 25 June 2010: Staying in a loveless relationship is not right for the baby, or you, or Boyfriend.
I'm trying to think what I would have to do if I had a girlfriend, sister, or whatever who had had amnesia. I think the very first requirement would be to be ho... (read in full...)
I do not want to play second fiddle!
Q. Hello - i am new here, i am going through a very complicated situation and i need advice. I know this seems so wrong but i really need constructive comments. We met four years ago and we always get along very well but as we do not live in the same...
A. 25 June 2010: What you say makes a lot of sense.
I think you should finish your current relationship, since it's as good as dead anyways. And then, take your chances with him. It's early, yes, but your staying with Boyfriend N° 1 sends the message that you... (read in full...)
Amnesia stole four years of my life and what I am learning of my boyfriend now, is not promising.
Q. right this is quite complicated and long so please bear with me i need advice. In April of this year i ended up in hospital having had a seizure, it turned out i had a small blood clot on my brain. the main side effect was that i got retro grade ...
A. 24 June 2010: This is a very difficult question indeed. I'll try to do my best.
Amnesia is an awful thing in itself, but, in this particular case, it is worse because it has taken away the criteria you would have to decide whether you should stay with the boyf... (read in full...)
I do not want to play second fiddle!
Q. Hello - i am new here, i am going through a very complicated situation and i need advice. I know this seems so wrong but i really need constructive comments. We met four years ago and we always get along very well but as we do not live in the same...
A. 24 June 2010: As in another post Caring Guy (hiya!) also happened to give an answer to, I believe circumstances are very important here.
First, your relationship with this man would be more difficult than usual because you live in different countries. He must ... (read in full...)
At 18 his father took them to a prostitute, I can't seem to get over that??
Q. Im not looking so much for an answer as advice from people who have maybe been in a similar situation. My bf and i have been together almost a year now, in that time i found out he had slept with a prostitute, before he was with me. I find this ...
A. 24 June 2010: He can't change who he slept with. Either you take him, or dump him. To say otherwise would be to deceive you.... (read in full...)
I want to have oral sex, she doesn't, what can I do?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been dating for about 5 months now. We have a very good sex life and I've always been (and still am) extremely attracted to her. The only problem is, she won't EVER let me go down on her. I have been trying since the day ...
A. 24 June 2010: I'm not a lady, but I can tell you what you can do. You can watch TV, check your Facebook, read a good book, mow the lawn... The world is so full of wonderful activities! A creative mind will unearth them all! But, you can't have oral sex. She ... (read in full...)
Do I have to tell the new guy about the other guy?
Q. I guess you could say that I'm talking to this new guy I met a couple weeks ago. He's really sweet and fun but he also lives 6 hours away (driving). He's really into me but we've talked about taking it slow and deciding if we actually do want to be ...
A. 24 June 2010: "I wouldn't want to give the old guy up if this thing with the new guy goes nowhere."
There's your answer.... (read in full...)
Should I worry about him watching youtube's big ghetto booty shaking??
Q. Ive been with my bf 10yrs....we were supposed to get married this year. He lives in San Diego. ..they just moved like1 yrs ago. .they bought a business as a family. ...n in Nov I went to India. N during my vacation. ..he was busy taking care of his ...
A. 24 June 2010: Don't worry about your booty.... (read in full...)
How do I accept that I am just not "girlfriend material"?
Q. After my last "almost-relationship" (see the question "He's with another woman, but still comes to me to talk about sex!"), a big heartache and working through it and analysing my life and relationships with guys I do realise that I am "just not ...
A. 24 June 2010: I wouldn't be that negative about yourself. Maybe it's me, but in your post I don't find any clues as to what can be the matter with you, if there is any, that is. I wonder if your analysis of the situation is the right one.
I do like the fact... (read in full...)
How can I get him to stop looking at adult websites?
Q. Hi, sisters..We married last year after six month dating. He is a wonderful man who is hard worker and caring his family. But one thing is bothering me very much is he's sexual behavior. He having pantyhose addiction and want sex all the time. Many ...
A. 24 June 2010: Hey! We're aunts here!
I agree with the Reader Anonymous and a bit with the Wise Woman of the Forest. You want him to stop looking at porn; the rest is fine with you. Try to keep what you have and see what you can do about the rest.... (read in full...)
Do I have to tell the new guy about the other guy?
Q. I guess you could say that I'm talking to this new guy I met a couple weeks ago. He's really sweet and fun but he also lives 6 hours away (driving). He's really into me but we've talked about taking it slow and deciding if we actually do want to be ...
A. 24 June 2010: I'm with Sincerely. The easy way to know what to do is ask yourself what you would feel if he were sleeping with another woman, and you weren't sleeping with another man.... (read in full...)
Is hugging another woman after making a fidelity promise immoral?
Q. Is seeing and hugging a soul mate woman immoral when a husband made a fidelity promise to God?...
A. 24 June 2010: Did you see her with lust in your heart, and hugged her with even more lust in your heart? In that case, and from a religious perspective, the answer is yes.
If you're married, from a non-religious perspective, you aren't supposed to "stare" ... (read in full...)
Radical Right-Wing Romeo Drives Juliet Crazy! Help!
Q. My boyfriend is a Christian. We've been together 1 and 1/2 years. I consider myself a lapsed-catholic. He feels very strongly about his beliefs, namely he's totally against abortion and homosexuality. My sister is transgendered and in the process of ...
A. 23 June 2010: Well, the sad answer is, you have to choose.
I believe you are right in what you think about his character. You know, when a person feels he or she owns absolute truth, then whatever doesn't suit that absolute truth has to be discarded or chang... (read in full...)
Did I shave myself incorrectly?
Q. Please please help me! It's stupid but everyone said they shave their vagina, so I decided I had to try it. I look under other questions on this web and used the answers eg use a razor and the lips the hardest part .. So I've done it now, and I ...
A. 23 June 2010: All I can say on the matter is Ouch!... (read in full...)
I need help in helping a friend move on!
Q. Hello Dears, I'm not necessarily new here, as I have been anonymously answering and asking questions for about a month now. But anyway... I have a problem - well not my problem but it's a friend's problem and I have taken it on as my problem becau...
A. 22 June 2010: If this is really a question about your friend, then I have to say that you can't help someone move on. You move on when you make a decision to. You might provide the person with a point of view, but you can't make them move on.... (read in full...)
His ex has a new and improved face!!
Q. Guys, here's a question for you. My boyfriend's ex, with whom he was in a 4 year relationship with, has had major plastic surgery on her face since they broke up nearly 3 years ago. She has a new chin, and most recently, a new nose, a la Micha...
A. 22 June 2010: Your question about plastic surgery is too general. "Plastic surgery" can mean "what you do to help a person with severe burns". I am saying this just for the sake of clarification, and I'm not that stupid not to notice that you mean "Plastic ... (read in full...)
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