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My husband is interested in shemales, what can I do?

Tagged as: Cheating, Marriage problems, Sex, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (9 July 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 10 July 2010)
A female United States age 51-59, anonymous writes:

My husband and I have so much love for each other almost 9 yrs. We are a very loving couple in other people's eyes. However, I found out he is interested in shemale two months ago. Not only spending thousands of money to chat with them and even writing to each other in personal email. He told me that is his fantasy which he keeps long before he know me. I was so scarced what happened to him and wonderif he is still interested in me? Another problem between us is: we don't have sex for a year. What his excuse is he's too tired from work or whatever.......I surely not very happy about that cos I am only 39 and he is 59, how come he doesn't want to make love to his loved one? I don't know if this is the reason or what but another scary thing I found was: I found a full pack of tablets in his drawer and he took 30 at least. I was very curious what are those pills for as he is not a pill taking guy. I check their name on the web and what a shock that is for helping "erection". I can't believe what I read??? I wasn't with him for 2 months as I was back to my hometown take care of my sick mom, then why did he take those pills for? With whom? Or he took it when he was watching the shemale porn star doing the private show? I was almost collapse, what happen to my wonderful marriage, what kind of guy I have been living with all these years? I asked him stop doing that to hurt me and he promised he won't do that again but I know they are still emailing each other. He said they are only friends, nothing else but I insist he shouldn't go further with them anymore. I really scare he might want to have sex with them someday. He keeps asking me let it go, it's nothing like what I think and we should back to our loving normal life. I don't know, I am so confuse about his love for me. I don't know how many lies he keeps and I can't take that anymore. I start low self esteem cos he spent that much of money watching them doing live show but he didn't want to make love to a real woman who lives with him? Who am I to him and I can't see our future. Someone please help me!

View related questions: his ex, money, porn, self esteem, shemale, transexual porn

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A female reader, biggatecrab United States +, writes (10 July 2010):

Well, I talked with him last night and he said he loves me so much, he doesn't want to lose me. Therefore, he emailed them to tell them no more writing, I hope it's ture.

I did write to one of his "friends" asked "her" not to write to my husband anymore but "she" replied me, "I love your husband very very much" That is very disgusting and hurt me so bad. It is not only sexual attraction? It is involve love? What kind of love? My God! I know "she" is still writing to my husband, I really really hope my husband will stop this weired relationship or attraction to them if he cherishs our marriage.

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A male reader, Danielepew Mexico +, writes (9 July 2010):

Danielepew agony auntI'm sorry to say it this bluntly, but I can't think of a man who takes pills to have erections and is not having sex. Sometimes things are not what they seem to be, but I'm afraid that this time it is pretty much clear.

Since he hasn't been having sex with you, I guess he's having sex with someone else. I don't and I can't know for sure, but I would suspect that.

I don't want to sound judgmental but, at least where I live, real men are not into shemales. If he's interested in the "she" part, then he has that in you. The "male" part is what you can't give him. And I have a gut feeling that he just wouldn't be friends with someone he didn't personally meet, in the course of his normal life, when that someone happens to have the sexual characteristics he confesses to have had years-old fantasies for.

You need to do some serious thinking and you need to talk long and hard with him. You need to know where you stand. In this situation, I think you would need to draw a line in the sand. You want him to be your man, and not share him with anyone else, shemale or she or male or whatever; can he give you that?

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