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*lassyKirsty agony aunt


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*lassyKirsty's profile:

Hello :) I am currently a student studying in the scientific field area, and i take passion in what I study, and i intend to fulfill my aspirations which lie ahead of me :)

I am here to help other people with their complex life dilemmas, i strongly believe in the theory that a problem shared is a problem halved :)

I am a straightforward, direct kind of person as well as easy going and funloving :) Unfortunately, i still do struggle with my love life so i feel i can relate to other people on this site that are :)I got to admit, i am impatient, I tend to rush things forward which is why ive been told to slow down so many times haha! :)

Enjoy life as it comes, take care everyone :) xxx

How can I deal with this? I feel left out on facebook, cant help it! my siblings talk to each other and not me!

Q.   My brother and sister and sister in law and I are all adults over 30 with our own lives, we all live in different places. They are younger than me, are quite close and will often comment/like or post things on each other facebook walls. ...

A.   14 March 2014: Reality check for you :) People are very co-dependent/reliant on social media nowadays, and will be for a very long time. Ok, they are using Facebook as a leverage to maintain their relationship with each other but so can you :). I understa... (read in full...)

Broke up with my girlfriend of 2 years, was it the wrong thing to do?

Q.   Hi, I'm in dire need of help. I've been dating my girlfriend for almost 2 years now, long distance as of right now, we see each other once every 2 months for a few days or so. I love her, I know I do, but about 5 months ago I broke up with her beca...

A.   14 March 2014: If you are not ready to be monogamous, then I would leave this girl alone so you can leave her free to be with someone who will be an everlasting love, but she only dropped the "i like somebody else that is much closer to me" bombshell because you ... (read in full...)

Should I interfere?

Q.   I have two older sisters and, unfortunately there is a fall out with the eldest one and she has been off the scene for a year and a half. I learned she was dating someone older and she visited our mother at Christmas with him. Right enough, he is ni...

A.   21 February 2014: There is a idiom which applies to this situation which is let sleeping dogs lie :) but however there is a distinction between intervening and giving wisdom and solicited guidance to your older sister. I would not disclose to anyone that you did your ... (read in full...)

Is it normal for female friends to tease their male friends with their breasts?

Q.   Is it normal for female friends to tease their male friends with their breasts? Since I met them in college, my two female friends tend to mess with me. They know I can be a bit, what's the word...embarrassed when I see their cleavage or something. ...

A.   21 February 2014: It sounds to me like these 2 girls used and flaunted their best assets to their own advantage just to entice you to pay instead of splitting the bill and paying their own fair share. What a snide manipulative way to wriggle out of something scott ... (read in full...)

I'm infatuated with one of my girlfriend's co-workers!

Q.   So, I have a crush on one of my girlfriend's co-workers. They are indeed friends as well. When my GF first introduced us, I felt a weird vibe like she was kind of into me. Of course I was playing everything off. Nevertheless, I feel almost consumed...

A.   12 September 2013: I will cut to the chase and say cut your losses and focus all of your energy on your current partner :) or IF lusting after other women besides your girlfriend develops into a habit, tap into your inner self and ask why before it gets out of ... (read in full...)

Cougar needs advice - does he like me?

Q.   Hi everyone. I am a 32 year old mother of 2 children. But I am stuck in a loveless marriage with an uncaring husband. However I have recently fallen for another man who is intelligent, has many of the same qualities as me, and ohh so gorgeous ...

A.   15 August 2013: Hi there It would help if you took a step back and shed some light on this.One of the reasons you desire this younger man is due to u feel ur marriage is breaking down due to lack of chemistry, attraction, compatability and this other man is provi... (read in full...)

Can you have sex without feelings?

Q.   I am super confused, please help me figure this one out! If a guy said he never had relationships with a girl, he only used her for sex, how in the name of everything that's good can it carry on for 2-3 months and no feelings whatsoever developed? ...

A.   25 March 2013: Majority of men do have the ability to compartmentalize but then the same applies to alot of promiscuous girls who r seeking out a no strings attached relationship. If there r no substantial feelings behind sex then inhibitions, consideration and ... (read in full...)

Should I tell my friend about a drunken fumble with her boyfriend?

Q.   I recently went on a weekend away with my boyfriend, two of my friends and their boyfriends. We always go out as a group and all get along really well. One night we was playing drinking games and everyone ended up naked. This is the first time ...

A.   25 March 2013: Honesty is the best policy yes, and u do not need to have a guilty conscience because you did not intend for this to happen. It was him that betrayed ur friend and not u. This is just going to play on ur mind and memories will come flooding back ... (read in full...)

How can I be happy again?

Q.   i just got out of a breakup, about a month ago, and im crying every day since, not being able to smile or laugh or have fun, i cant even remember what makes me happy. hes going out with girls, takin gpictures with them who post them on ...

A.   8 September 2012: Hi there :) I am going to reserve any judgement because I have been there done that and got the T shirt so i can empathize with u there :/ Ur friends are right in giving u advice such as delete him and to cut all lines of communication because ... (read in full...)

Why does my boyfriend's mother speak through her son to me?

Q.   My boyfriends mother speaks through my boyfriend to me whenever he and I are in the same room together. But when he is not there, she will talk to me directly. A few weeks ago they ran out of hot water. His mum came in and first asked my boyfrie...

A.   7 August 2012: I think she just feels that if she speaks to her son on ur behalf, she will get a more accurate answer rather than making u feel that she is interrogating u directly to ur face, and is perhaps decreasing some of the pressure by focusing on him to do ... (read in full...)

He verbally abuses me, we had a fist fight, I don't trust him but I love him!

Q.   Hello Agonies. Let me get straight to it..I seem to can't let go and move on from my bf, no matter what he ever did or said to me, whom has cheated on me 5x's, he's very disrespectful, he wants to act like a stray dog and do what he wants to do. ...

A.   7 August 2012: Hello there :) I understand that when u r genuinely in love with someone regardless of their flaws, u get emotionally attached to them. My theory is if u dont let go of the wrong person, it minimizes ur chances of meeting the right one. He has cros... (read in full...)

Am I reading too much into things?

Q.   How do you ever know if a guy likes you (but is too afraid to tell you) or just cares for you as a friend? I have a guy friend whom I've known for two years. He's helped me a lot and been through a lot with me. One day he suddenly texted "I like you ...

A.   31 July 2012: Just directly ask him the context in which he meant it in such as do u like me more than just a friend or only platonic? That seemed to me a little out of the blue for him to be saying I like you very much because most friends would not have to tell... (read in full...)

I'm awkward around people. Is this a problem I can fix? How?

Q.   It's the weirdest thing. I'm just not comfortable around people, even my friends. I mean, I just started really hanging out with them alone, and I find I'm struggling for thing to say and I'm worrying about what they think. Then whenever I do come ...

A.   19 April 2012: Hi there :) The relationship with old friends being diminished is a natural phase of life im afraid as some people come and go in life whereas others stay permanently in ur life :)if u make the decision to actively engage and branch out in a new so... (read in full...)

Am I pregnant or is it my diet?

Q.   I need help. I'm turning 21 soon and yes I am sexually active. We use condoms and I just had my period a week or two ago. Now, I don't think I'm pregnant but I'm reading articles about morning bloating and they all say it's an early sign of ...

A.   10 March 2012: Do not react prematurely to this, the bloating may be a post symptom of after having ur period, but it seems from ur case after a time interval of 2-3 weeks, so i suggest trying to vary ur diet with more fruit and vegetables, more fiber rich ... (read in full...)

Is it too early to be discussing marriage and children?

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years, we are 23 and have discussed moving in, but he says hes not ready yet and mayb in a year or 2. Also he says at the minute he doesnt want kids or marriage in the future. It is something i would probably ...

A.   12 February 2012: Marriage and children are a big commitment, and it is not a light hearted decision. not that i have children myself, but my next door neighbour has a baby, and her feedback is that they r time consuming, hard work, pretty expensive and they r ... (read in full...)

He is so wrapped in his own world he can't see I like him!

Q.   I have a crush on this guy in my class in college. He is very laid back, down to earth, kind, sensitive but he is very much too laid back if ya know what I mean. He's always wrapped up in his own sort of world and doesn't notice the fact that som...

A.   15 January 2012: This guy seems to be overly comfortable in his *own bubble*, which can be referred to as his comfort zone, which he may be reluctant to leave. If he is content in the way in which things in his life are looking e.g academic and social reasons, ... (read in full...)

Mixed signals from him. Do I ignore them?

Q.   i like this guy. i have known him since 7th grade and i liked him then, but i never had the guts to tell him. then he went out with my best friend. then i moved in 8th grade. then i saw him again at the church my sister goes to in 10th grade. ...

A.   30 December 2011: He seems oblivious to the fact that you like him, i would take a risk and break the ice with him :) if u dont risk anything, the the response is always no, take this from my past experience :) Seeing as he didnt get the green light from ur best frie... (read in full...)

I'm married and now my lover is also married I'm struggling to accept she is physical with another man....I don't want to share her!

Q.   I am married and had a relationship with collegaue in office. We got along for couple of years well including physically and now she got married to a guy. She says she wants to continue being physical with me but I am finding it hard to accept now ...

A.   15 November 2011: It sounds to me like you are in a serious love triangle here, you are up for commitment whereas she is a commitment phobe. She is just having her cake and eating it, savouring the best of both worlds whereas this leaves you wound up hurt. Marria... (read in full...)

Is this culture shock?

Q.   Hello! Well...I am a latin woman (south american) who likes and enjoy going out. I love dance and have fun with people. I am living in US for almost 4 years now. Last weekend I went out with a friend of mine. She is american and we went to a very ...

A.   31 October 2011: In regards to your friend who attended the nightclub with u, i would say that it is partially a different culture shock, but the other side of the coin is that she was most probably envious of the male attention that you were attracting, but she was ... (read in full...)

I don't think I'm imagining this-my teacher constantly stares at me!

Q.   My teacher always stares at me ? I'm a 17 year old female and I've noticed that a male teacher who I haven't had as a teacher constantly stares at me in the hall ways as well as sometimes when he pops into my other classes. It started last year and...

A.   18 October 2011: As he is in a professional position/member of authority, he is NOT entitled to make you feel intimidated or uneasy in any way. He can potentially lose his job and trust if he is caught red handed. You are tackling this in an appropriate manner by n... (read in full...)

I'm tired of people having a go at me over my relationship!

Q.   Dear agony aunts I really need some advice as my prob is upsetting me so much and I don't know how to handle it. I am with a really amazing guy. He loves me and is loyal, kind and honest. I feel so lucky to have him. However, he has chi...

A.   10 October 2011: Your current spouse sounds like he is a good practical man, decent, strong willed, faithful and a devoted family man which are admirable traits. His ex, well... its a different story for her, she is the polar opposite :( If your partner has got some... (read in full...)

My manager changed his attitude towards me when he found out I had a boyfriend, but we broke up and his attitude still hasn't changed! What should I do?

Q.   hello. I hope that i can get deep analysis of my situation help me find an answer of what shall i do? i had a boy friend for 5 years and during my friendship to him i started working in a company. At company, i met a deputy manager and we u...

A.   10 October 2011: I do not comprehend why ur deputy manager would develop a vendetta against u for having a partner :S my only suggestions to offer you are (a) either he got insanely jealous for u being attahced to someone else and he desired that off you or (b) u... (read in full...)

How do I deal with moving away from my boyfriend?

Q.   So I am moving away from my boyfriend permanently and he ignores me a lot and gets mad easily. I understand that he is upset about it, but he will not communicate how he feels. I ask him how he feels about the situation and he says that he loves me ...

A.   7 October 2011: If you are moving away permanatly, he and you both know that the relationship will be very difficult to maintain. He is refusing to communicate or express how he feels due to the fact that this is equally as hard for him as it is for u. He may feel ... (read in full...)

I have never been pursued by a guy.

Q.   Through out high school, and now in college, I have watched my friends have guys coming up to them, flirting with them and getting their numbers. This has never happened to me and makes me feel extremely sad, unwanted and lonely. The only two guys I ...

A.   2 October 2011: I have endured exactly the same thing when i was in my high school days, i can recall just how atrocious that felt when my friends would get their selection of guys :( it really does rub salt into the wound when only you feel that this reinforces ... (read in full...)

Is he ready to call it quits? And can't tell me yet? should I continue down the same path and give him space?

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for 8 months now and I just can't figure out where our relationship is going and what it is that he wants. When we first started dating, things were so wonderful that I cannot even explain. We have so many things i...

A.   30 September 2011: At the first stage of the relationship, the romance is at it's highest optimum peak, but as it proceeds, it does naturally tend to lose some of the novelty, only SOME. It is blatantly obvious that you both initially had some fantastic chemistry, but ... (read in full...)

Is it weird that the only thing I'm really concerned about is what my body will look like postpartum?

Q.   My fiance and I are both 21, been together for three years, we're both continuing our educations, and we're 2.5 months pregnant. I know we'll survive financially because we already have a few thousand saved up from working so much the last three ...

A.   28 September 2011: Your physical appearance is the initial worry that the majority of pregnant women in their early stages. If you are pretty adamant that you will survive financially, then money matters will obviously be the last thing on your mind :) I do not want... (read in full...)

Do these crazy dreams mean we are meant to have one more child?

Q.   i had a dream my ex got me pregnant and then another night had another dream that I GOT HIM PREGNANT ... what does this mean? and we have an 8 month old together does it mean we are meant to have 1 more child?...

A.   28 September 2011: Dreams can usually be symbolic, but they can also represent and protray your deepest desires. But the cons of dreams are that they can be related to passing thoughts and activities which have been conjured up in your imagination throughout the day, ... (read in full...)

I'm not over her. How do I get over her so that we can just be good friends?.

Q.   i like this girl a lot and i have been into her for the past year and she knew i liked her all along.... she then said that she didn't like me and that i was just a friend to her. Our friendship deteriorated because of the awkwardness and she wasn...

A.   28 September 2011: I personally think that it was good of you to take the initiative and to reveal your feelings for her, which i must admit takes quite alot of courage due to a common fear of rejection :) It took a blow to the heart naturally because she didnt reci... (read in full...)

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