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*lower girl agony aunt

*lower girl

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Hi everyone,

Oh my god over a year on since i first joined this site (where has the time gone) and i'm still loving it.

I got alot of help from all of the fantastic aunts and uncles when i needed it most, it was great getting everyone else's views on my situation at the time and it's great to see that those same people are still here doing the same fantastic job.

Due to what i have been through and the advise i have recieved off of here i am a much stronger person now and have so much more confidence in myself.

I am turning thirty this year i have a wonderful husband, yeah we have had our problems but thats life, and two fantastic children and i really believe my life is starting now and i cant wait for the rest of it.

Take care.xx.

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Very confusing behavior from him

Q.   Okay, theres this guy and I'm not sure if he likes me or not. He's very confusing. He sits near me in class, finds ways to talk to me about random things, and he even playfully teases me about other guys(that are my friends) A.K.A liking me. He even ...

A.   19 December 2008: Sounds to me as though he likes you and the flirting with others in front of you is his way of trying to make you jealous, one of you needs to make the first move and if one of you does not want it then you both know where you stand. Take care xx... (read in full...)

Ladies please answer: He's 19 years younger is it ok to bring sex into the relationship?

Q.   I have a good relationship with a younger man who is 19 years younger than I am. It is ok to consider sex in our relationship? The age thing won’t get in the way? Ladies please respond. Should an older woman have sex with a younger man? Any...

A.   19 December 2008: My thoughts are, why not if you are sexually attracted to each other and its legal then go for it the age thing is only an issue if you make it one. Take care xx... (read in full...)

Am I just going through a natural period of confusion?

Q.   After a short and mostly rocky marriage, my husband and I seperated about three months ago. About two weeks after I left, he began pleading with me to reconcile, saying he has been going to counseling and made a huge mistake in asking me to leave. ...

A.   19 December 2008: Hi, You need to talk to him and let him know that it is not a decision that can be made by one person. I think alot of people go through this situation at some point in their marriage i have recently been through the same thing. He has had his ... (read in full...)

Should I tell my future fiance I kissed another girl??

Q.   I am doing long distance with my girlfriend for 2 years. I am about to propose to her and move in together, but for the next month we will still be apart. Last week, I kissed another girl. There was absolutely no emotional connection. Should I ...

A.   1 December 2007: Only tell her about it, if you are not 100% sure that it will not get back to her from someone else, as if she is going to haer it it would at least be better if coming from you. Otherwise i would keep quiet about it, as we all make mistakes, i just... (read in full...)

Why doesn't he come to see me?

Q.   My boyfriend and I we have been dating for over 6 years, he lives in the UK and he is married, I am living in France and I am single. We do care about each other and we do trust each other. We get on well even though we are far from each other. ...

A.   23 November 2007: Sorry got to agree with the others, i have been on the other side of an affair and it's bloody hell, just think how it would effect you if he was your husband doing it to you. There's plenty of unattached guys out there. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

I have some lumps near my vagina. Could it be an STD?

Q.   Hi, god this is so hard to write i'm so embarrassed! I found some like lumps on the outside on the lips of my vagina, i dunno they don't itch or anything they're just there not painful but of course i jump to conclusion that i ave warts or somethi...

A.   20 November 2007: I used to be the same as you and worry about going to see my doctor about anything to do with that area, if you have a male doctor talk to the surgery and ask if you could see a women doctor if you would feel more comfortable with it. It 100% need... (read in full...)

Can a man get sick from having sex while the girl is menstruating?

Q.   i've been trying to have a baby with my partner of eight years.we've been trying to make a baby since last year and nothing has happened so far.i decided that we try having sex when i'm menstruating too but my partner is afraid of this because he ...

A.   20 November 2007: Well i can't say i have ever heard of anyone getting six through intercourse whilst menstruating, especially if you are both free from stds, and as for getting pregnant you can get pregnant at any time of the month. So summing up i guess if you are ... (read in full...)

Is it too soon to move in with him?

Q.   I have been dating a guy for 3 months and I have 2 kids is it too soon to move in with him...

A.   20 November 2007: This is just my personal opinion but i would say with the relationship still being in the very early stages and the fact you have children it's too early as it would be a major upheval for all of you and if it does not work out it may effect the ... (read in full...)

Should I wait for him to make up his mind or move on?

Q.   I have been with my fiance for four years, we have two beautiful baby boys together, i thought things were coming together until about a month ago he started acting some type of way, hiding his phone, rushing me out of his house, arguments starting ...

A.   20 November 2007: The only way you will find out for sure is if you give him that ultimatum and then stick to it, now i understand you have children together so you would have to have contact because of them but if he choses her then you need to walk away from him ... (read in full...)

Should I date as many girls as I can or just try to find that one perfect girl for me?

Q.   Hello Aunts. I've been thinking; I'm 18 years old, and I want somebody to spend my life with. Someone I can wake up to in the morning and cuddle up to at night, somebody I can talk to about anything. Basically somebody I can share my life with. ...

A.   20 November 2007: Hey, If you hunt you will not find, just go out and have fun and don't put so much pressure on yourself to find the right person for you, they will turn up when you are least expecting it. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

My ex husband won't leave me alone even though it has been 3 years since the divorce and he is living with another woman, what can I do??

Q.   My ex husband and i am divorced. We have been apart for three years now. but he won't leave me alone. I did or probably dolove him so much that i have been unable to let him go. To be blunt he is living with another woman but sometimes sees me 3 ...

A.   19 November 2007: Ok i totally understand where you are coming from, i think it is pretty clear you still love him and that is why you have been seeing him like you have. Do you want him back, do you think he will ever come back? You need to try and talk to him and ... (read in full...)

I have a gut feeling she tries to hide things about her past from me. Should I say something to her or just let it go?

Q.   hey people just wanted to know wot to do...ive been with my gf for about a year now we do hava good relationship..but theres a few things that bother me and im worried it may effect our relationship..we gave our vrginity to each other.. I...

A.   19 November 2007: It really depends on how much she means to you, if it was something that happened before you were together why should it matter, sometimes people have things in their past they just don't want to remember or talk about. You should not have any reas... (read in full...)

He cheated on me, help me get this out of my head?

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for over three years. He ended up cheatin on me wen he had to move back home earlier this year. i haven't forgiven him as such but i am givin him a second chance. i can't stop thinkin that he is lyin to me i know i'm ...

A.   19 November 2007: Everyone makes mistakes babe, moreso i think at that age, unfortunately there are no guarantees in a relationship and sometimes i think something like that needs to happen in a relationship to make people realise what they have got. Maybe he real... (read in full...)

I regret letting her go but it might be too late anyway

Q.   Well, here it is. I've been such an idiot. I have been in a relationship for 8 years and my girlfriend broke up with me a few months back. She was always head over heels about me and I took this for granted. We have spoken several times but it ...

A.   19 November 2007: Hey good to hear an update. I would say that most people would not buy a present for an ex, so i still think there is hope there. Some people may say that you are being strung along but these will generally be people that have been hurt and just... (read in full...)

Should I change myself to suit him? I can sit down and enjoy the peace with him at home but he can't go out and enjoy a night out with me in the pub, which I'm used to.

Q.   I am 42 just divorced. I met this man 18 years older than me and we get on well. He helps me to get through my divorce when I was totally lost. I know I need someone there to ease my pain. I cant think of anything else at that time but stick to ...

A.   17 November 2007: Hi, It sounds very much as though since your divorce you have not had any time to yourself, which i think is what you need just so you can find yourself again. You have been in a marriage for however many years and you are used to doing things i... (read in full...)

Is he having an emotional affair??

Q.   My husband of eighteen years has moved out a few weeks ago. We had a huge row about something very serious and now, were barely speaking. He has suggested divorce. A few months ago, he was contacted by a woman whom he'd dated in high school a...

A.   17 November 2007: Oh my god i really feel for you as this is mirror image of my marriage over a year ago, me and my husband were going through financial difficulties, had his brother living with us and things just seemed to drive a wedge between us, my husband ... (read in full...)

How do you have... an interesting personality? What puts off women on a date?

Q.   i have often wondered what it s that puts off women when i want to go on a date with them. I realise now that it is because i am boring. what do i have to do to have an interesting personality?...

A.   15 November 2007: God if we all liked each other it would be a nightmare, i'm sure you have plenty of friends who like you for who you are, you do not need to change yourself for anyone, if someone does not like you for who you are you are not right for them thats ... (read in full...)

What about how I say how good I was?

Q.   My boyfriend gave me oral the other day in the back seat of my car. He had tried a few weeks before but didnt like it so he didnt do it til the other night. After that he decided he really REALLY liked doing it. The next day he did it again and it ...

A.   15 November 2007: Everyone loves compliments, and you letting your boyfriend know just how much you like him doing things like tht will just boost his confindence even more. So i personally would say there is absolutely nothing wrong with it at all. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Why do I never orgasm when I'm with him?

Q.   I'm seeing this guy at the moment? When we have sex I never orgasm, he does. Last time we were togerther he tried really hard and we tried a few different positions but still nothing. I really need some help and advice as I am really inexperie...

A.   13 November 2007: Hey don't worry about it, alot of women don't orgasm through intercourse alone, just keep on trying more different positions you may find you get there you might not, if you don't just make sure you get it another way. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

I like him a lot but I don't have any feelings towards him.

Q.   I'm seeing this guy at the moment and weve been togerther for a month and a half. when I met him I was a virgin and I'm not now I like him a lot but I don't have any feelings towards him. Everyone I tell says I should see how it goes and giv...

A.   13 November 2007: You can't force feelings babe they are either there or they are not, it's up to you what you do but it might be fairer on both of you if you move on, as you could stay with him waiting for these feelings to develope and they just don't by which time ... (read in full...)

How do I move on after being together for 2 and a half years?

Q.   Today my girlfriend broke up with me after 2 and 1/2 years, she had some issues about a month ago but she said that we had sorted them out. I went to see her today and she said we should break up, I dont know what to do it was out of nowhere. I ...

A.   13 November 2007: You have to just take each day as it comes, you are going to feel numb you have been together a long time, so it's not like you are going to wake up tomorrow and have forgotten about her. My best advice to you at this time would be to surround your... (read in full...)

I want to move out and let my children see in the longrun it was the right thing to do.

Q.   Sigh... I started out young, I have a 11 year old son and 7 year old daughter, like late teens. I thought I was doing the right thing by getting married and well, things didn't get much better. So I thought, you know, maybe if I move us all into our ...

A.   9 November 2007: We all make mistakes and i would have to agree that we all need to be happy and there is not alot of point staying in a relationship if you are not both happy. Most children, although it is hard for them to deal with do get used to things in time... (read in full...)

Are there any people out here that are in a marriage an have been cheated on or have cheated themselves?

Q.   Are there any people out here that are in a marriage an have been cheated on or have cheated themselves. If you are, would you please tell me or share if after a while it will ever get better and happiness will return? If you cheated (male only) did ...

A.   9 November 2007: Hi My husband chaeted on me and then left and moved in with his girlfriend, he was suffering with depression at the time and he was just not right. After eight months of being away, i cant say i had moved on, but things were getting slightly... (read in full...)

How do you win back a lost love?

Q.   I would like to open a topic of conversation for anyone with knowledge about what it takes to win back a lost love. Especially one who seems to still be interested but trying to act cool so it isn't showing or at least he doens't think it is. Cause ...

A.   7 November 2007: Thats great news, all you need to do now is take it day by day. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

My heart cries out for her. What am I supposed to do?

Q.   I broke up with my ex-girlfriend about four months ago after a five year on-off relationship. I always wanted to be with her, we could communicate naturally and easily, we wanted the same things out of life and I felt so comfortable with her. She ...

A.   1 November 2007: You heart will still cry out for her, you were together a long time and the split is still raw. You just carry on what you are doing moving on and it will get easier, it in some ways is like a greiving process you have been round someone along time... (read in full...)

I'm dating a girl who lives with her boyfriend. Can you help me?

Q.   Hi I met a girl though the internet 7 months ago. She lives with her boyfriend who she has been with for 9 years, 6 of them living together. I new this from the start but just thught it would be a sexual relationship. We struck up a real good ...

A.   29 October 2007: Hey hey... It's a bloody good start, you have scared her enough to make her realize you are not going to put up with her messing you around, fingers crossed she leaves him for good now. Well done you for sticking up for yourself. All the best, let... (read in full...)

Should I quit my job to get away from the married co-worker I'm having an affair with? Tried to end it many times, but cannot.

Q.   I have been having an affair with a Married co-worker (Man) for the past 3 years. I have tried several times to end, but can not. Should I just quit my job all together to get away from the urges??...

A.   27 October 2007: Do you honestly think that leaving you current place of employment will actually stop what is going on? ... (read in full...)

Do I tell him I'm a virgin or not?

Q.   Hello, I was wondering if anybody could help me? I am 20 (almost 21) years old and at university. I am still a virgin, mainly because I am very shy around guys and have always got cold feet whenever I got close to getting intimate with a guy. But ...

A.   26 October 2007: I think that most men would find the fact you are still a virgin a very attractive quality, so please don't be put off by the last guy's responce. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Do I wait for her?

Q.   Dear all will it be worth waiting for a women that I still love and she love aswell but she need to be alone we are both thinking about each other every second of the day and dont now how it will end? Take care Marco...

A.   26 October 2007: Wait as long as you are prepared to wait but don't put your life on hold, if you are meant to be she will be with you when she has had her time. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Is it natural to think that your girlfriend is the sexiest person in the world?

Q.   Is it natural to think that your girlfriend is the sexiest person in the world? I ask because it feels like I've lost the most gorgeous woman I'll ever meet. She split with me some months back after 3 years together, and now I don't think I'm ...

A.   26 October 2007: I think we all feel like that about our first love babe. I have not found anyone that even comes close to my husband and i don't think i ever will. Take care.x.... (read in full...)

How can you become a better girlfriend?

Q.   How to be the Perfect Girlfriend? what is it? They dont want us to nag, they want sex, they are intterest in being with us...how do you know if they care. How do you be a better girlfriend that he will love instead of being nagging or over ...

A.   26 October 2007: Babe you should be loved for you, you don't need to change for anyone and if your other half is not happy with certain things about you he is not the right person for you. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

I'm 20 she's 17, will we have enough in common or am I too old for her?

Q.   I am 20 and mid way through my junior year of college. I'm trying to decide if I want to start a relationship with a 17 year old high school senior girl that lives back home. I'm worried about a few things, (1) is age a problem, (2) where we are at ...

A.   25 October 2007: I was 16 and my husband was 20 when we met and thirteen years later we are still together, if you like each other it will work just don't listen to other people puttng the relationship down. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Quick masturbation - increasing the risk of premature ejaculation? Any techniques to prolong climax?

Q.   If you masturbate too quickly (i.e. before 10 minutes) does that mean I will experience premature ejaculation more frequently than most guys? If so can anyone give any techniques to prolong climax?...

A.   25 October 2007: Hey i'm not a guy so don't take everything i say as gospel, but if you try and hold off when you feel you are at the point when you are going to climax, wait a couple of mins it will last longer. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Why is my ex still calling if he dumped me?

Q.   i was with my ex-bf for 6 years and he broke up with me because of our constant fighting. i think he just didnt love me. since our break up, 1 year ago, he still calls every 2 weeks, why? i asked him not to call if he was seeing anyone. when i p...

A.   25 October 2007: There might still be some feelings there, but it sounds to me as though he is looking for a reaction from you as he has no reason to tell you what he has been up to with other people. If you have no feelings for him tell him you want no further cont... (read in full...)

Is it normal for a guy to say that to his true lover during oral? Makes me feel uncomfortable.

Q.   is it normal that my guy says "f_cker" while we were doing oral sex? i feel very uncomfortable to hear that. its sounds like im a prostitute..so i wonder is it normal to a guy say that to his true lover?? thanks for help!!...

A.   25 October 2007: Tell him that you feel uncomfortable with him saying this, it is possible that he means nothing by it. If you are really comfortable with someone in the bedroom you often say what you really want he may not realise it actually affends you. Take ... (read in full...)

I think she's falling for me. How do I let her down gently?

Q.   Okay well im 16 atm, and theres this girl 14. I have known her since the day she was born, and we have always been soo close. See tells me everything, and can even help me out when im down. but recently she has broken up with her bf, and im worried ...

A.   24 October 2007: If you are that close then you know deep down where this could lead to if she had her way, so the only way you can sort this is to have a chat with her and let her know exactly where the line is when it comes to your friendship, and hey she may well ... (read in full...)

I got married 3 months ago and feel trapped!

Q.   I ive been in a relationship for the past 5 years and we have a 4 year old boy. I have a great home and dont want for anything materialistic but feel very trapped. I got married 3 months ago. Months before the wedding day I was having second ...

A.   24 October 2007: You can't worry about what friends and family will think of you if you left him, anyway i think you will be surprised at the support you will recieve from friends and family if they know the situation. If you are really not happy and he has no inte... (read in full...)

I'm dating a girl who lives with her boyfriend. Can you help me?

Q.   Hi I met a girl though the internet 7 months ago. She lives with her boyfriend who she has been with for 9 years, 6 of them living together. I new this from the start but just thught it would be a sexual relationship. We struck up a real good ...

A.   24 October 2007: Cake and eat it springs to mind, she has you for the relationship she wants and the sex but she is being selfish, she does not want to give up the other guy because he is paying her rent, so she has money tied up in the business, big deal that can ... (read in full...)

How can I see this differently so that it doesn't hurt as much?

Q.   My girlfriend is in her mid 20s and I am three and a half years younger. She is everything I ever wished in a woman that I want to be with. She shares all of my interests, sense of humor, and perspective on life. I never thought that I'd meet ...

A.   24 October 2007: I struggled with it too, when i met my husband he was three years older than me, i was just out of school and so much less experienced than him, after a year of my jealousy and insecurities he had enough and ended it and it took that for me to ... (read in full...)

I want to end it but I can't. What should I do?

Q.   hi, heres my problem. im with this guy who is also with someone else and i thought i would be ok with it but now his other girlfriend has announced she is pregnant.the bad thing is that i want to end it with him but ive fallen in love with him and ...

A.   24 October 2007: Don't you think you are worth more than what he is offering you? He is quite happy to be with the two of you, so clearly has no respect for either of you and that in itself should be enough to make you want to end it, that is if you have any self... (read in full...)

How can I see this differently so that it doesn't hurt as much?

Q.   My girlfriend is in her mid 20s and I am three and a half years younger. She is everything I ever wished in a woman that I want to be with. She shares all of my interests, sense of humor, and perspective on life. I never thought that I'd meet ...

A.   24 October 2007: You need to try and look at it as a good thing and realise that if you let things like this worry you, you will never have a decent relationship. We all have pasts and even those with pasts don't neccassarily like to remember them, she is with you ... (read in full...)

How do you win back a lost love?

Q.   I would like to open a topic of conversation for anyone with knowledge about what it takes to win back a lost love. Especially one who seems to still be interested but trying to act cool so it isn't showing or at least he doens't think it is. Cause ...

A.   21 October 2007: If they think there is a possibility of you seeing someone else that can sometimes speed up their thinking. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

I regret letting her go but it might be too late anyway

Q.   Well, here it is. I've been such an idiot. I have been in a relationship for 8 years and my girlfriend broke up with me a few months back. She was always head over heels about me and I took this for granted. We have spoken several times but it ...

A.   18 October 2007: Don't give up yet, all the signs are good i think and she has been honest with you and told you how she feels at the moment, so i think you would be making a mistake giving up. Give her her space and don't blow it by getting too heavy she knows how ... (read in full...)

How do you win back a lost love?

Q.   I would like to open a topic of conversation for anyone with knowledge about what it takes to win back a lost love. Especially one who seems to still be interested but trying to act cool so it isn't showing or at least he doens't think it is. Cause ...

A.   18 October 2007: Let them know how much you love them and then leave them to it, my husband left me sept 06 and i fought for him all i could never leaving him alone and constantly phoning him trying to find out what had gone wrong because even though he was seeing ... (read in full...)

I regret letting her go but it might be too late anyway

Q.   Well, here it is. I've been such an idiot. I have been in a relationship for 8 years and my girlfriend broke up with me a few months back. She was always head over heels about me and I took this for granted. We have spoken several times but it ...

A.   13 October 2007: Eight years she has waited for you to say that you want to marry her, up until you told her that when it was possibly too late, i'm sure in her eyes she has had nothing but knock backs from the man she thought loved her, maybe she distanced herself ... (read in full...)

I regret letting her go but it might be too late anyway

Q.   Well, here it is. I've been such an idiot. I have been in a relationship for 8 years and my girlfriend broke up with me a few months back. She was always head over heels about me and I took this for granted. We have spoken several times but it ...

A.   13 October 2007: She has told you she needs time and until you give it to her her head will be all over the place, so tell her once more exactly how you feel and give her that space that she needs. You can set yourself a time limit if you want, what you think woul... (read in full...)

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