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... Send *ELLULAH a private message | | | *ELLULAH's profile:Hi, I have been through loads in my life. Marriage break up, boyfriend break ups, and been a single parent. I have been treated really bad sometimes, but i think this is all to do with life. I dont hold grudges, and have a good sence of humour. I just love all my friends and family, and have loads of support from them. So i thought i could share that with a few of you. I have asked for advice a few times. You dont always want to hear it, but there are some smart people out there.
I have now found, after a lot of searching, my soul mate. But lifes not all a bed of roses for us. But he keeps me smiling, well most of the time anyway. |
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Ex husband suggested reconciliacion, when I agreed he said it was too late as he found another - now he tells people it was me who wanted to get back, making me look like a fool! How do I get past this?
Q. why did my ex husband say he wanted to get back with me,after a year then i said give me abit of time to think,and i said ok lets give it ago and he said its to late he has found someone else and wants to be with her.the new women told me she was no ...
A. 24 October 2007: Listen Honey,
You are certainly not a fool. And I presume this idiot you were married too was around the same age as you. He should grow up a bit dont you think?.
Just because you didnt jump to a decision straight away, he imediatly finds someone ... (read in full...)
I feel she is inconsiderate to me as concerns her relation with her ex, and others have noticed too she's putting me in an incomfortable position. Am I being unreasonable/jealous?
Q. I met a great girl 8 months ago. We get on fantastic. But a little problem is starting to put tension and barriers between us. we have run into her ex b/f on a number of occasions. On the first occasion at her local pub she chatted with him...
A. 24 October 2007: NO YOUR NOT BEING UNREASONABLE. She is clearly loving every moment of all this attention, and as you say she cant take it if she see's a picture of your ex. That's a double standard if ever I heard of one. Maybe she is telling the truth, and he me... (read in full...)
I'm a proffessional hacker, but I don't like what I've found. What shall I do?
Q. I'm 30 years old and have been with my boyfriend for 7 months. I've known him for 6-7 years. We were friends before anything. I moved from one coast to have. But I am highly insecure which causes me to snoop. I ama professional in Computer spyware ...
A. 19 October 2007: Hi Honey,
He has got to be the most stupid man on earth, knowing that you can find out so easy. Although normally I think that snooping is totally wrong. If you didnt feel the insecurity that you do, you probably wouldnt find the need to do it in t... (read in full...)
What do you get a man you fancy for christmas, something that might be a small hint? And do you think he likes me back?
Q. Just a quick question: what do you get a man you fancy for christmas, something that might be a small hint? He seems to know me very well and vice versa (he messaged me some songs that he thought I'd enjoy and I LOVED them, which is amazing as ...
A. 17 October 2007: Hi,
How about some cinema tickets. Get two and then he may ask you to go with him. You could decide between you what you want to see.
XX... (read in full...)
How do I deal with b/f BO?
Q. my boyfriend has a bit of a B.O problem. i mean ont get me wrong he baths daily, uses aftershave and keeps clean but he doesnt use anti-persprint under his arms and tey get sweaty and you can smell it. he comes over to me and he leans over gives me ...
A. 17 October 2007: Hi,
Yes it could be his age, and he doesnt realise how bad he smells.
But he is your boyfriend, and do you want people to take the mickey out of him, because they will. Tell him as nicely as you can that he needs to not only wash, but to use an a... (read in full...)
Pregnant to a married man
Q. I was in a relationship with a married man as we found out I was pregnant I was taking precautions I have seen him for a ywar and now that this has happened he wants to end it all and have nothing at all to do with baby....
A. 17 October 2007: Hi Honey,
Sorry, but what did you expect. He has shown his real colours and although you have the ball in your court I would think twice about using it.
You could cause him major trouble by telling his poor wife, but this would only hurt her. And... (read in full...)
Everythings great, except he's lazy!
Q. hi My fiance and i have been together a little over a year .We were quite happy together about 7 months ago we moved in together and now it seems im always getting upset with him about things like picking up after himself or just helping me with ...
A. 17 October 2007: Hi,
Either ask him nicely to help, or live with the fact he is lazy and you will have to do it all, and get rid of him.
I am afraid there are a lot of men out there like this, I am lucky enough to be the owner of one myself.L.O.L.
I cant stand t... (read in full...)
Is it worth another go? Soo confused!
Q. Dear Cupid, I wrote to you previously about my boyfriend, now my X who I seperated with due to the arguing and the fact that i felt as though i was always there for him and he wasnt there for me and afew lies that he told, soo the trust went too. ...
A. 17 October 2007: Hi,
I think!!! you would be mad to bother.
You know you dont trust him, and you think he is going to use you just so he has a girlfriend. So whats to go back for really.
I know its dis-heartening when you feel like you will never meet the right on... (read in full...)
I know better but I want him
Q. am 26 years old,am in love with a 46 year old man who is a real player,for the first 6months he was all i ever dream t off,later i found out that he was involved with many other women but keeps on denying it.he insists that they are just good ...
A. 17 October 2007: Why oh Why, are you chasing him. Are you mental? L.O.L. You are 26, he is 46. Christ girl! he should be chasing you and you should be telling him to get lost. I dont believe that an age gap cant work, but this guy sounds like more hard work than he ... (read in full...)
Is there any way to speed up labour??
Q. I'm just over nine months pregant. 2 days ago i had a small amount of clear fluid run down my leg, it's the 3rd time it's happened. I was wondering if theres anyway to speed up labour? People have suggested driving fast over a hill, and one lady ...
A. 17 October 2007: Hi, My best friend is also pregnant and in the last couple of weeks of it. Its been really horrble for her, and she has had a really bad pregnancy. So she cant wait for the labour pains to begin. My heart goes out to you, waiting 9 months sucks. Bu... (read in full...)
My husband wants me to get rid of the dog, we fight about it, but I can't do it!
Q. I am 26, my husband is 32. We've been married a short time and have a 6 mo. old and another on the way. I stay home, he works. We rescued a puppy last feb. he was 10 weeks old. My husband has grown increasingly annoyed with the dog, and now is ...
A. 17 October 2007: Hi,
I have owned a English Bull terrier, and a Staffordshire Bull terrier, both from pups. They were wonderfull dogs and lovely company.
However!! I have also been bitten by the Bull terrier, totally not her fault. We were playing frisbee and I we... (read in full...)
He's always bringing up anal sex. I never plan to do it. What should I tell him?
Q. hi, I've been in a relationship with this guy for almost 2 months. He treats me really well and all that. The thing is that he's always bringing up anal sex. A lot of the time he brings it up in a joking way, but I know he's just testing the ...
A. 16 October 2007: Hi,
I would tell him that if he takes it up the bum first, and manages not to pooh, you might think about it. That should put him off, and if it doesnt and he likes the idea, I would run for the hills. L.O.L... (read in full...)
My love is getting divorced, getting back with her husband, taking a break... It keeps changing and I am heartbroken and lost
Q. OK here goes i am 26 and she is 26 ,i am about to spill my heart out for advice ,everything i am about to mention is the truth , some things have not been mentioned to protect the people involved however this is only about half of the things i would ...
A. 15 October 2007: Hi,
What a pickle your both in. She is obviously torn because of her child, and this is normal. The thing I dont get is why the child didnt come with her as well, then maybe she wouldnt have gone back.
The only advice I can offer is to give her... (read in full...)
His life is wonderful and exciting, mine is the pits. How can we work?
Q. i am in major need of some help please. I need to know if my relationship is destroyed. I am very insecure. I have been with my bf for 5 months and love him so so much. I have talked to him about my insecurities and he says said that he will stick ...
A. 15 October 2007: Hi,
Its not that your life is bad, but you are living a lie. No one likes a liar and eventually you will get found out. Your guilt is probably making you misserable.
Right!! so your first course of action should be to get on top of things again. F... (read in full...)
Turns out I was the other woman, so I broke it off with him, but now I regret it.
Q. i found out the man i was seeing had another woman and i finished wish him because he wouldn't leave her again (he already left her for someone who then dumped him, twice, then got back with the first woman who he is now with still). I miss him so ...
A. 15 October 2007: Hi,
Blimey no wonder he looked tired shagging all those different women. I am sorry but the guy is a dog, and I can only feel pity for the poor cow that is shacked up with him at the moment.
I dont want to come accross as uncaring, but the best thi... (read in full...)
I read his emails and now feel more insecure than ever!
Q. please help me ppl!!i know its really wrong of me but my boyfriend left his emails open wen he went to uni today. I have recently failed my first year here, and am now looking for a full time job. We have been through a bit of a rough patch latley ...
A. 15 October 2007: Hi,
If he hasnt really done anything yet, why are you worried?. He might have been asking the friends advice over something, but cant tell you or you will hit the roof.
Of course their are hot girls at Uni, he is only spelling out the obvious,... (read in full...)
I am cheating on my guy and not sure what to do!
Q. I'm a 19 year old young mum with a daughter whos nearly 2, ive been with her dad for around 3 years now. We have had our ups and downs which consist of both of us being unfaithful and him being violent etc. It has got to the point where i have ...
A. 15 October 2007: Hi,
I understand you are unhappy honey, but putting yourself into more trouble before you get out of the one your in now, is not the answer.
You need to get away from the guy you are with, as soon as you can. If you are both being un-faith... (read in full...)
I'm 18 and like a guy who's 41. Love has no restrictions........right?
Q. What should I do? Im 18 and there is this guy I like who is 42. Im a big believer in age aint nothin but a number. Ive always been attracted to older guys (and country guys but thats another story). I would definitely say I am mature for my age. My ...
A. 15 October 2007: Anon's girlfriend must have just left him.
There is part truth in what he say's, but you are over the age of consent, and its up to you what you do.
As for the saying "I am mature for my age", I dont think thats Crap at all. I have two young sa... (read in full...)
I'm tri-sexual - why do I do what I do?
Q. I'm a Trisexual Transvestite. First trisexual means I love women, men, and pretty passable male to female pre-op transsexuals. I'm a transvestite because I dress up in womens lingerie and dresses for sexual reasons. I also feel very submissive ...
A. 12 October 2007: Have you ever thought of having a cup of tea and a bit of cake. It works for Boy George.
XX sorry dont mean to take the mickey, but you like group sex and sound like you are doing OK. Whats to understand?.... (read in full...)
I promised myself that I won't see him again. How can I keep to it?
Q. I decided not to call him again after he said to me that he didn't want to marry me or see me often. However, i don't know if i can keep this decision for ever. I think that i will change my mind as i am feeling that i miss him. However i don't want ...
A. 12 October 2007: Hi,
Everytime that you feel lonely and are weakening on your decision, just remember that this guy does not want a future with you. He would just be using you until someone comes along that he does want to marry and will leave you broken hear... (read in full...)
I'm teetotal. Will his friends still like me when they know this?
Q. Ive made the decision to never drink and I think ive made a good decision for myself, however I feel that so many poeple look down upon me for it, or think m weird. Im about to meet my bfs friends for the first time and my bf even says they are he...
A. 12 October 2007: Hi,
I dont know why anyone should look at you different because of that, its just stupid. So what if you dont drink, you enjoy yourself dont you?. Do you drive by any chance, because if you do I would think you are a great girlfriend to have. My b... (read in full...)
I have a smelly discharge. What can I do?
Q. Hi i have a problem of bad odour discharge which comes some times and it is bringing trouble when with my partner during sex. what can i do? i feel very uncomfortable about this....
A. 11 October 2007: Hi,
It sounds like thrush, and you will both need to be treated. Dont worry though its nothing to worry about, and your doctor can soon sort it out for you.
If you have taken anti-biotics recently, that could be the cause. Unfotunatly it will kee... (read in full...)
Anyone had A.D.D. as a kid?
Q. My sister insist that my child has A.D.D. Whenever I tell her he doesn't seem to be based on the signs which I've Googled. She says I just don't want him to be. I don't want to get him tested,because there are no real test. I think a huge part of ...
A. 11 October 2007: Hi,
Just wanted to add, that I know it can be a misserable time coping with this. I worked for 5 years in a playgroup, and there wre a few kids that came through with this.
Diet can also make lots of diference. All the adatives in food nowdays ... (read in full...)
I called my gf to vent about someone - and she took his side and hung up on me! Did I overreact? Did she overreact? Opinions, please!
Q. Hi all, I have a dilemma I hope I can get answers to and would appreciate any help I can get. My gf of 4 months and I had an argument last night over the phone. It generally began when I had a tiff with my housemates about one of them pul...
A. 11 October 2007: Hi,
It depends on how you started the conversation. For instance, if you started talking agresively about your mate straight away. Maybe she thought sticking up for them a bit was going to defuse the situation, and calm you down. Obviously this back... (read in full...)
Should I confess to my husband that I once had an affair during our marriage?
Q. Hi. Is it good to confess to my husband that I once had an affair with another man during our married life? Or should I just forget it? I stopped it, anyway....
A. 11 October 2007: Very hard, but I think you should tell him. Even though you finished with the other guy, it could come back to haunt you. If your husband finds out in the future, wont that be worse?.
Sorry honey but your damned if you do or dont tell him! You just... (read in full...)
Have been in a relationship for 6 1/2 yrs, we have a good sex life and are very close. However I just discovered he's been emailing girls a lot, requesting contact, dirty talk and discrete relationships. What to do?
Q. I'm 25 and have been in a relationship for 6 1/2 years. At the moment we are happy and have been for a while. We have a good sex life and are very close, or so I though. I have discovered that he has been joining matchmaker forums and st...
A. 11 October 2007: Hi, It may be that he is just looking for a bit of a buzz. Either way this is just plain wrong, and I agree with Uncle Phil you need to confront him with it to see why he feels the need to cheat on you.
I must say you are very patient with him. I th... (read in full...)
Is there somethint he's not telling me, or is it me?
Q. Someone give me some good advice, PLEASE! I`m 31 and a mother of three and also three months pregnant and live with my partner, he is a great dad and great partner but the thing is three years ago i thought and accused my partner of having an affai...
A. 11 October 2007: Hi,
Your not going crazy honey your pregnant. Let me tell you, I have a friend thats pregnant at the moment, nearly 8 months. She is like a sister more than a mate. We have been in many stuations together and always been there to support one-... (read in full...)
I'm 18 and like a guy who's 41. Love has no restrictions........right?
Q. What should I do? Im 18 and there is this guy I like who is 42. Im a big believer in age aint nothin but a number. Ive always been attracted to older guys (and country guys but thats another story). I would definitely say I am mature for my age. My ...
A. 11 October 2007: Hi,
Couldnt agree with rcn more. Men love food and funnily enough most like 18 year old girls so your onto a winner really. LOL
XXX... (read in full...)
What was she thinking 20 years ago?
Q. Had a follow up question and wanted to provide an update. BTW I appeciate all the help and I apologize to anyone Ive offended here. I'm fairly emotional right now and know people sometimes see things very differently. My wife and I are working ...
A. 11 October 2007: Hi,
I have to say that at one point I was getting pretty angry at your attitude towards your wife. It seemed that the only thing you cared about was the fact she had been to scared to tell the truth.
But I have been following what we have all said... (read in full...)
What was she thinking 20 years ago?
Q. Had a follow up question and wanted to provide an update. BTW I appeciate all the help and I apologize to anyone Ive offended here. I'm fairly emotional right now and know people sometimes see things very differently. My wife and I are working ...
A. 10 October 2007: Houston,
Have you never done anything that you are ashamed of. Hand on heart can you honstly say you have never ever made a mistake. Because I know I have, and It took me an awfull lot of years to reveal the truth, 26 actually. The person invo... (read in full...)
I thought I'd found the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and until recently I though he felt the same!
Q. I thought i had found the man i wanted to spend the rest of my life with and until a few weeks ago i though he felt the same. He said he shared the same as aspirations as me, marriage and kids in our future. He even took me to see a site he was ...
A. 10 October 2007: Hi,
Its a hard fact of life to except that he is placing a job over you. This can only mean that he no longer feels the same about your relationship. What has caused this, only he knows the truth. If he says its the job, then maybe it was. But I ca... (read in full...)
Are there any pointers anyone can give me with striking up a conversation to at least get talking to her?
Q. I'm 19, I've never had a girlfriend and don't really find any attraction in very many women (apart from sexually) which really depresses me. What I mean is that I can't see myself with these people in my future and that's what really bothers me. ...
A. 10 October 2007: Hi,
I am sure if you went up to her and said "Hello I remember you from school, how are you". She would answer back. If you pluck up the courage to just start like that, it will be fine.
I think maybe your problem is you are looking at women as... (read in full...)
I found emails he sent to another woman before we got back together and I feel betrayed...
Q. Hello all, I hope someone can give me some advice about how I should react to following situation: My fiance and I have been together for two years now. We broke up in March this year as I wanted to take our relationship one step further, get ma...
A. 10 October 2007: Hi,
Maybe a little over reaction. Although its perfectly understandable that you feel this way towards him. But this man loves you, cant you see that?. If she had meant anything at all to him, why would he have wanted you so badly?.
I think wh... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Big milestone..... over 300,000 unique visitors over the past month :-)
Q. Cool... Over the past month, from Sept 8th to Oct 9th we had over 300,000 unique visitors to the site! According to google analytics we had 302,516 visitors. It doesn't seem that long ago I was posting when we had passed 250,000 visitors/month. ...
A. 10 October 2007: Hi Andrew,
Just goes to show how many mixed up people have been helped. I know i have enjoyed every minute I have been on here. And also feel like I made a couple of friends on the way.
Tellulah XXX... (read in full...)
What was she thinking 20 years ago?
Q. Had a follow up question and wanted to provide an update. BTW I appeciate all the help and I apologize to anyone Ive offended here. I'm fairly emotional right now and know people sometimes see things very differently. My wife and I are working ...
A. 10 October 2007: Anon, Which is no doubt why you stay ANON. Yes we can read, and if you really think it is perfectly normal to hold a grudge after 20 years, you know some strange people.... (read in full...)
I want a threesome, she's reluctant. What do I do now?
Q. Ok here's the story, I hooked up with this chick I met a little while ago and we get along famously. We speak often, have a good time when we go out, great sex albeit a little infrequently due to distance constraints. It hasn't been going long ...
A. 9 October 2007: I think its a great idea!!! You, her and another man. What more can a girl ask for. I must admit my partner would never let me shag another guy in front of him. All I can say is she is a lucky, lucky! girl.
What on earth is she complaining abou... (read in full...)
What was she thinking 20 years ago?
Q. Had a follow up question and wanted to provide an update. BTW I appeciate all the help and I apologize to anyone Ive offended here. I'm fairly emotional right now and know people sometimes see things very differently. My wife and I are working ...
A. 9 October 2007: Really!! what do you want from her, BLOOD. She made a mistake 20 years ago, and it does read like it was 3 weeks before you got to-gether. Which would make it none of your buisness anyway. But if she was with you and she did it!! it was 20 years ... (read in full...)
All we seem to do when we're together is argue! Should I stick with or move on?
Q. My boyfrind has very demanding job which means he has to travel alot. when we r together all we seem to do is argue. I want to know if its work that is our problem or if its something deeper. we had an arguemnt the other day that culminated in the ...
A. 9 October 2007: Hi,
All relationships have thier problems, and with the added work load your B/F is probably feeling the presure.
You dont seem very suportive of him in your post, although its hard to tell because you dont give many details. i.e: is it permanan... (read in full...)
I'm always playing Gooseberry - how can I trust a man again?
Q. Hi I need help! i feel so lonely and down! All my friends have BFs and im constantly playing goosebery! I try to make excuses not to go out with my friends everyweek because they all bring along ther fellas which i think is great coz we al...
A. 8 October 2007: Hi,
What would you do if this was one of your friends. Put yourself in that position, and think about it again. Would you want them to come out with you and your B/F. If you are any kind of friend of course you would.
I understand that its hard bei... (read in full...)
We like to have sex anywhere that could be fun, bus shelters etc; my bf is 17 and I'm 15, could this be wrong?
Q. is what im doing ok?? i like to be very passionate in the bedroom. i prefer to use handcuffs or belocked to a bed while a guy takes full advantage of me. i like to have sex in the back of a car, morrisons carpark, in bus shelters. on park benched or ...
A. 5 October 2007: Well they do say in the Morrisons advert, that everything is really fresh. I didnt think they meant the car park as well though. LOL.
Seriously though, you do need to be a bit carefull. Your not going to have a very nice name if anyone finds out ... (read in full...)
He stopped texting, but I've caught him looking at me! I've also seen his buddy giving me strange stares. What's this mean?
Q. i'm 16 and there's this guy who texted me everyday for a period of time. but now he has stopped, but i've caught him looking at me several times already. either that or i've caught his good buddy staring strangely at me. what does this mean?...
A. 5 October 2007: It means, you must be stunning and everyone fancies you. Or they cant make up their minds who should go for it.... (read in full...)
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