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... Send *ELLULAH a private message | | | *ELLULAH's profile:Hi, I have been through loads in my life. Marriage break up, boyfriend break ups, and been a single parent. I have been treated really bad sometimes, but i think this is all to do with life. I dont hold grudges, and have a good sence of humour. I just love all my friends and family, and have loads of support from them. So i thought i could share that with a few of you. I have asked for advice a few times. You dont always want to hear it, but there are some smart people out there.
I have now found, after a lot of searching, my soul mate. But lifes not all a bed of roses for us. But he keeps me smiling, well most of the time anyway. |
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He's moving out of our mother's finally but he's just replacing her with a girlfriend
Q. My 37 yr old brother has yet to cut the cord with our mom. Now he tells me he wants to do just that and finally move out. But his plan is to move into his wealthy girlfriends furnished house in florida. How can I make him see he's replacing one ...
A. 4 July 2007: Hi,
Whats wrong with hiim moving into his girlfreinds house. So what if it goes wrong he will learn from this, and maybe it wont. He might be the luckiest guy in town.
By the way, Guys never cut the apron strings with their mum's, just like gir... (read in full...)
If women cheat on a man, could it be that something is missing in what he is able to give a relationship?
Q. If a man has had two women who he loved who cheated on him would you assume something is missing in what he is able to give to a relationship? This guy seems so emotionally detached....
A. 3 July 2007: Hi,
He could have just been unlucky i guess.
But if he seems un-emotional with you, I would use caution in your relationship with him. You dont want to fall for this guy and then find out he is a robot emotionally do you.
Take care XX
... (read in full...)
Gonna dress up in heels and fishnets and show up at his door
Q. Just had a relationship breakup. Thinking of showing up at his place in heels and fishnet tights and showing him a side he never saw. Sex between us was almost nonexistent and now I just want to dominate him in a sexual way. He has never seen this ...
A. 3 July 2007: Dont do it your going to humiliate yourself.
There is a reason that you broke up, so find a new guy to flaunt this side of you.
And lets face it you will have the last laugh wont you, your new man is going to see a side of you that no-one else has... (read in full...)
How do you overcome a deep obsession with an ex?
Q. HOW DO YOU OVERCOME A DEEP OBSSESSION WITH AN EX??? Please dont tell me to move on; thats the point, I want and need to so desperately but cant seem to do it. How do I stop spying on him and his new girlfriend via myspace, looking at all her ...
A. 3 July 2007: Hi,
You will do it naturally in time. Its probably that you havnt met someone else yet.
Dont expect miracles, there is nothing wrong with the way you feel.
My Husband left me 20 years ago, and I still look out for him, or word of him. I dont sit c... (read in full...)
My boyfriend broke up with me...how do I not hurt him now?
Q. My boyfriend of six months just broke up with me. I'm heartbroken. This stupid part of me still loves him, and I'm actually so much more worried about his broken heart than mine (He still loves me too). What should I do to ease the pain for bot...
A. 2 July 2007: Hi,
Sorry i agree with Dr Pete, it really does sound like you are in denial.
If this guy really loved you why would he finnish it, it makes no sence. Unless there is another reason that you have not mentioned, I cannot understand why you are so w... (read in full...)
I help people as much as I can, but I am not happy--any advice?
Q. I have been in a relationship for 7 months tomorrow and I don't feel happy at all! Since I have been going out with my girlfriend she has cheated on me 3 times and I even caught her giving one of my "friends" a blowjob in a toilet of a discotech. ...
A. 2 July 2007: Hi,
Couldnt agree with others more, you need to get out of that relationship. And giving a blow-*** in a night club (class).
Its no good doing things for people and expecting it back, you are setting yourself up for disapointment. Only do what you... (read in full...)
He says he wants to marry me, but he's always on the phone with someone else--help!
Q. Hi, I have been in a relationship for 9 months. My boyfriend is much older than me and it was with much effort that we are where we are. I have never cheated on him but I suspect that he is having telephonic communication with a girl that was from ...
A. 2 July 2007: Hi,
Tell him to stop this, or you are off. Dont let him do this to you, or he will always think he can get away with it.
If this guy wants to marry you, then I am guessing he loves you very much. So he shouldnt do anything that would upset you or m... (read in full...)
I have always liked a girl who is now pregnant--should I chase her?
Q. Ok I'm new to this site but I was looking to see what people thought about this situation that has me trippin'. I met this one girl and I always liked her, but we never talked. I never tryed getting with her because she's my friend's little s...
A. 2 July 2007: Ah,
I think you are wonderfull to even consider doing this. There are nice men out there after all.
I would take Flower Girls comments into consideration though. Are you able to take this baby on, if things got a little serious. Why dont you let ... (read in full...)
He was very generous financially to his ex wife but doesn't help me with our bills
Q. Hi all and hope your well. I need some advice from the ladies really. I have kept my boyfriend for the past 18 months, while he was sorting out finances with his ex wife. Its all sorted now, they sold their house, and he brought her a new one so...
A. 2 July 2007: Thanks for all your advice,
Have spoken about the money issue now and he
will be helping out in the future. He said I only had to ask him, but my responce was that i didnt think I should have to. You cant go and live somewhere for free, no matter h... (read in full...)
I like a new lad... but still have feelings for my ex?
Q. I havn't been going out with my ex now for three months, a girl split us up becaus my ex still had feelings for her whilst we were going out but insisted they were just mates. I knew about this so I was paranoid and jelous and we argued a lot. W...
A. 2 July 2007: Hi,
As you are not with either, as a girlfreind, I dont think you need to explain anything to anyone of them. Its hard letting go because you are used to your ex, and you dont know what lays ahead of it all.
I really believe you should cut off from... (read in full...)
My girlfriend never wants to have sex anymore!
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for about a year and a half. When we first got together it was without a doubt the happiest that I have ever been in my life. But now things have changed and I don´t know what to do. She doesn´t want to have sex with ...
A. 28 June 2007: Hi,
I have the same problem with my partner sometimes. He has gone right off sex, and says there is no problem. I think to him there's not, but the more I badger him the more he shy's away.
The best thing to do is leave them alone for a few week... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wont buy my car, but I think she should
Q. I recently suggested to my girlfriend that she could buy my car off me in about a year or so when she has passed her test. She hasn't even started learning yet. The car itself is in perfect condition and everyone who sees it wished they had a car ...
A. 28 June 2007: Sorry, how are you helping her out.
You did say you were selling it to her and not giving it away. Well if she has to buy her own car maybe she wants one that she really likes and she feels looks good.
Why do you think women wear massive high hee... (read in full...)
I'm going to the doctor about depression, anybody have any help or advice on the subject?
Q. my mum thinks i have depression because lately ive felt really low and ive lost my appetite and im finding it harder and harder to sleep. On monday ive got to go see a doctor which im quite nervous about (even though i want to get help with this) i ...
A. 28 June 2007: Hi Darling,
That's a horrible thing to have to suffer. I used to suffer from depression, and was on all types of tablets. And I am not saying that they didnt help, but there not a long term fix.
I have a friend who gets severly depressed if the w... (read in full...)
She went away for 4 months and I missed her terribly. Now she's dumped me. What can I do?
Q. Hi iv been going out with my girlfriend for 5 years. She went traveling with one of her girl mate for 4 months. We where still in contact with each other on e-mail and she would phone me once a week. She just came back from traveling and me met up 1...
A. 28 June 2007: Hi,
I really feel for you, but if thats how she feels there is not a lot you can do about it. You cant make someone love you, no matter how hard you try. In fact trying to hard and begging can only make it worse.
Leave her alone for a while, a... (read in full...)
She told me her sexual history and she believes that she will only be loved if she gives a man what they want - sex. I can't stop thinking about it!
Q. Well I just recently started dating this girl. We've hit it off ridiculously well and I really have never felt this before in any of my past relationships. This morning she has told me about her sexual history. I figured that she had had sex before ...
A. 28 June 2007: Hi,
Well for psychology major, you are over-looking one thing. Its the past.
Just because she has acted this way in the past does not mean that she looks at you in the same way. You could be the person that will turn her life around, but not if y... (read in full...)
I'm tempted to have sex with him, but I know I'm too young. Any advice?
Q. My boyfriend and i have been together for a month and 6 days. He's very sweet and caring but all of a sudden he asked me if we can have sex. He said it's okay if i don't want to. I'm 14 and his going to be 15 on July 14th. I said Yes, its okay. But ...
A. 28 June 2007: Honey, be honest and tell him how you feel.
He may sulk a bit for a while, but he will have so much more respect for you if you dont do this. Ok he wont show this at the time, but in a year or so if you are still together, he and you will be prou... (read in full...)
My fiance treats his sister the same as he treats me! I doubt anyone would be able to tell who he is actually in a relationship with!!
Q. My fiancee has a very close relationship with his sister if we are all together no one would be able to tell who is the sister and who is the girlfriend. I get very jealous as eveything he does with me he does with her and 9 out of 10 times when we ...
A. 27 June 2007: Yes you are being really silly.
You should be proud that your boyfriend loves his sister, and they are good mates.
I had a very close relationship with my brother when we were younger. His girlfriend at the time did not get this at all. She actu... (read in full...)
I don't want to be tied down, but I feel an urge to have a baby!
Q. This is really weird. I'm nearly 16 and I've had sex twice with my boy-friend. My cousin is 18 and has a daughter and has just moved in with her boyfriend. My mum is a child minder so I see a few babies around the house sometimes. Recently I rea...
A. 27 June 2007: Hi,
It could be that you feel somthing is missing in your life, and that a baby to love and need you would fill this gap.
Its a funny age between 15-18, your not young anymore, but your not an adult and thinking rationally. It dosnt seem as daunt... (read in full...)
I feel nothing when having sex!
Q. why can't i feel noting when i have sex? does this mean im never going to have an orgasm?...
A. 27 June 2007: Hi,
What do you mean, you feel nothing?
Are you saying physically you cant feel anything or emotionally. If its physical, it could be that your partner is a bit small or that you could be a bit loose. Although at your age I would doubt that cou... (read in full...)
I believe he's after just one thing... and I want it too, but will I get hurt?
Q. theres a guy i like, and we flirt and regually send each other bad messages, pictures etc. however i believe he is just after one thing. but because im so attracted to him it doesnt bother me. his asked how far i would go with him and iv said all ...
A. 27 June 2007: Hi,
My advice would be not to go there. For one thing even though you are nearly 18, you dont sound ready for this. I am a bit of a romantic, and I do believe the first time with a guy, should be special and not something you regret later. I am not ... (read in full...)
She used me then started meeting up w/ her ex and lying about it! I split w/ her, but want her to realize the pain she put me through.
Q. My "ex" gf doesn't always log out of her yahoo email account properly so I checked her email after she uses the PC. I have been doing this for a little while now without her knowing and realise she has been meeting up with her ex. I told her tha...
A. 27 June 2007: Hi,
Although you are a snoop, and believe me when I say nothing good ever comes of this.
But you do find out the truth, and somtimes its the only way you will find out. And it can hurt really bad, and it makes you doubt that you are a nice per... (read in full...)
I like a new lad... but still have feelings for my ex?
Q. I havn't been going out with my ex now for three months, a girl split us up becaus my ex still had feelings for her whilst we were going out but insisted they were just mates. I knew about this so I was paranoid and jelous and we argued a lot. W...
A. 27 June 2007: Hi,
I think you should go for a drink with him.
You dont have to go down the same line as your ex, and sleep with the guy. But you do need to stop waiting around for your ex, to decide who's heart he will break. And dont forget, I bet you anything... (read in full...)
He abuses me all the time, especially when I don't respond to the names he calls me. I don't know what to do. Any advice?
Q. I fell for one of my close friends a while ago and he realised this and forced me to admit it to him (which i did). Before he knew for sure, we used to joke and have fun. Since then so much has changed and he abuses me all the time. I'm not sure ...
A. 18 June 2007: Hi,
Its always really sad to hear that someone is going through this. But the truth is the only person that can change this is YOU.
You need to drop him and not look back. Just think if it were one of your mates, what advice would you give them. I ... (read in full...)
Social services is charging my baby's father - my boyfriend - with sexual assault!! Can we get the charges dropped??
Q. i been with my boyfriend for 3 years now we just had a baby in february 07. social services are charging him with sexual assault because he is 29 years old and i'm 17 years old. do i have a chance to drop that charge? ...
A. 6 June 2007: It would depend on the Law of consent where you live. If you were in britain I dont think he would be charged. You need to get some legal advice, as to what your right's are.
But looking at the background of your question, you say you have been... (read in full...)
Are tattoos a turn-on or a turn-off for women?
Q. are tattoos a turnoff for most women? i have one tattoo at the moment, girls don't seem to mind that, but im looking at getting another one on my back, legs and my forearm.... do you think this would be enough to make some girls lose interest...
A. 6 June 2007: Hi,
Thought I would add my opinion.
My son-inlaw has a lot of tattoo's. Some are really good and other's are horrid. To my mind I agree with Stina, It doesn't look so hot if they are all spread about and with no meaning in them. My daughter... (read in full...)
I suck my thumb in private and my dad said I look stupid! I don't see why I should stop, though - any opinions?
Q. This isn't really loved based but I need people's points of view. I'm 17 and I suck my thumb, only in private, I can't give up and I don't want to really as I don't see anything wrong with it. Lately, my dad has been telling me off for it and says ...
A. 6 June 2007: My son is 20, and we have only just stoped from doing this, in public. I know he still does it when he is asleep, or stressed out though. The thing is I never sucked my thumb when I was younger, I had a manky Bear with a funny little coat, that went ... (read in full...)
Anyone who doesn't grovel at my feet is not worth my time. How do I get over my ego??
Q. I find it joyful to see someone beg down to me and ask for mercy so that I can then decide as to what I should do with that person. Basically I can only relate with someone who can surrender to my ego. If they don't, I just ignore them or can't ...
A. 4 June 2007: Get a really large ladder, are you for real. What kind of person says that sort of thing in the first place. Would be great to know the girl who will knock you down to size one day.... (read in full...)
She called me weak and said I grovelled. Then she said she was joking! I broke up w/ her - is this what she really wanted?
Q. Sorry for posting this again but I'd hoped to get a better response. I'm struggling to get over this and maybe someone out there can help me out. I need to know if I was wrong here. I went out with a girl for 6 months, during the first 3-4, s...
A. 1 June 2007: Hi,
I think she sounds like she is so used to dealing with men that are hard work, she is using the sarcasm as a defence method. This is wrong of course, but you can kind of understand she must feel pretty low about herself, and thats why she acte... (read in full...)
What is scat??
Q. I lost my virginity to my current boyfriend a few weeks ago. That's all well and fine, but now he's telling me that he has a fetish, "scat" I feel very embarrassed to ask him what this is. What is it?...
A. 24 May 2007: I thought it was a sleevless catsuit. God I hope he is into catsuits, and not the POO thing. YUK. Lol... (read in full...)
How do I drop a hint to my married co-worker, that I really him?
Q. I work with a manager who is about 48 yrs old. I like him a lot for his maturity, confidence, and sincere pride in his job and life. I'm a 20 yr old girl, but feel like he is someone I could get along really well with. I don't know if he likes me ...
A. 24 May 2007: You have a crush thats all. Have you thought how devestating this would be for his family.
And really, what will you have in common with him, he is nearly 30 years older for goodness sake.
Have you thought about this seriously, when you are 40 h... (read in full...)
I am experiencing negative emotions about my married guy. Will this destroy what we have?
Q. I have a boyfriend. He's married man and i love him very much. The problem is i understand there's nothing he could do that would be like dating a normal single guy. but i cannot live without him and i believe he loves me too. We have been togeth...
A. 24 May 2007: Hi,
Have been reading the answers from the other aunts, and as I told you, they would be mostly unsypathetic to your situation. And they are right, to give you this advice. But you cannot help who you fall in love with.
I agree that even if he do... (read in full...)
Why do men change when they have been with you for a few years?.
Q. Hi all, Would like your thoughts on this subject. Why do men change when they have been with you for a few years?. I remember when we first used to kiss and cuddle and it was like melting in his arms. The sex was the best ever, and we couldnt lea...
A. 24 May 2007: Hi,
Thanks you lot, your great.
Although I do try to surprise him, and I always try to dress nice for him. He has definatly got used to me fawning over him. And there lies the problem.
I need to make him realise, I am worth the effort he sh... (read in full...)
I am experiencing negative emotions about my married guy. Will this destroy what we have?
Q. I have a boyfriend. He's married man and i love him very much. The problem is i understand there's nothing he could do that would be like dating a normal single guy. but i cannot live without him and i believe he loves me too. We have been togeth...
A. 23 May 2007: Hi,
You will get a few nasty answers on this one I'm affraid, but not from me.
I understand completly how you feel, and its extremly hard. But this Guy is not showing you the life you deserve.
You can blame yourself, as I did, but he is to blame.... (read in full...)
I'm his first serious relationship, he wants to be with me but wants to date others for a bit!!!!!
Q. I have been dating this male who I am very close with and we are both serious. Im 22 and he is 20. He sees me as his soul mate and we are both in love and he cares for me. We have good communication and I trust him. One day he told me that he wants ...
A. 23 May 2007: Hi,
Yes I agree, he sounds like he needs to get more experience. But if you are his soul mate, is he prepared for the fact you may meet someone else and fall in love, and he could lose you, while he is getting this experience.
You are young, a... (read in full...)
Anything I can do to stop my hair thinning!?
Q. My hair used to be really really thick but over the past year has thinned out enormously and I fear baldness will be not far away. Is there anything I can do? Thanks....
A. 23 May 2007: There are quite a few different products you can use now, that will help slow down the thining of your hair. But maybe not stop this altogether.
Is there a reason for this happening?. Like stress or a medical problem. You should see your doct... (read in full...)
He's treating me the same awful way he treated his ex! Is he cheating on me too?
Q. Before me and my boyfreind were together he would call me every day, txt me goodnite, send me sweet messages, compliment me, talk to me all the time. he has changed a lot since we have been officially together, he hardly ever calls me or does those ...
A. 23 May 2007: Thats just not true.....Once a cheater always a cheater. Ok so you made a mistake by going with him before he left his last relationship. That wasnt very nice, but then it takes two, and if he had been happy he wouldnt have given you the time of day ... (read in full...)
How do I move on from my ex love?
Q. Please help me. My boyfriend, who I loved dearly, broke up with me almost five months ago. I heard he had met someone else ( we were long distance and he lives in another country) and was seeing her. I was so devastated. We had been trying t...
A. 22 May 2007: Hi,
Believe it or not, you will move on, because you have to.
Its really hard, and extremely painfull, but not impossible. Give yourself time, and try to keep busy with your friends.
You cannot do anything about the way he is choosing to live his ... (read in full...)
SITE NEWS: Video introduction to the site from Andrew, site founder!
Q. Message from Andrew, site founder: (let me know your comments!)...
A. 18 May 2007: Hi,
Oh my god, you look so different to what I expected. I have to say, I love this website. It's a fantastic idea, I am not surprised its so popular. Well done Andrew, top marks. XXX... (read in full...)
What can I do to earn some money???
Q. i want to buy new clothes because my wardrobe isnt up to date, and im not a snobby person, i just like to look pretty. but i never have any money! and i dont no how to earn it. i cant work because i go to saturday school and on a sunday i do cors...
A. 16 May 2007: Hi Honey,
Firstly, you cannot buy style. You would be amazed at some of the great stuff you can get in charity shops and even some of the cheap markets. My advice would be to get everything you have got in you wardrobe and look at it real care... (read in full...)
Can anyone tell me what male sperm tastes like when he comes during oral and can it do harm of swallowed?
Q. Can anyone tell me what male sperm tastes like when he comes during oral and can it do harm of swallowed?...
A. 15 May 2007: Hi
I agree with loretta, it tastes like salty snot. Not the best thing to have in your mouth, but if you love the guy, its not to bad.
And the taste does change slightly if you eat strong foods. Best thing to do if your going to do this deed, is... (read in full...)
Will I ever be free of depression?
Q. can anyone tell me if you can eva truley get over depression? i started dating my now husband when i was 14,i had been sexually active b4 i got with him but was cheated on by every one of them. After trying for 5yrs to get pregnant (i have polycyst...
A. 15 May 2007: Oh you poor thing,
You have had an awfull lot to deal with, no wonder you are depressed.
The good news. yes you can get over depression, but it takes lots of will from you, which at the moment you may not be able to deal with.
I never suggest that... (read in full...)
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