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I suck my thumb in private and my dad said I look stupid! I don't see why I should stop, though - any opinions?

Tagged as: Family, Health, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 June 2007) 16 Answers - (Newest, 17 April 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, *itizenerased writes:

This isn't really loved based but I need people's points of view. I'm 17 and I suck my thumb, only in private, I can't give up and I don't want to really as I don't see anything wrong with it. Lately, my dad has been telling me off for it and says he doesn't want to see me do it because I look stupid. He's never expressed a problem with it ever before, I haven't had any warnings that he's had a problem with it and now all of a sudden he goes crazy at me for it! I'm really stressed at the moment anyway and am not having a good time, this really doesn't help me. I suppose my question is: is it really that bad?! If I only do it in the privacy of my own home, I could try to give up again in a week or so when my exams are over but I personally don't feel I need to.

Any opinions would be appreciated.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2010):

I think you should keep on doing it. I also suck my thumb and it's the best! If your dad doesn't like it he doesn't have to look. Don't stop!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2007):

I am 19 and I suck my thumb too. It's crazy how common it really is, but how it is so embarassing to people.

Perhaps you should tell your dad that thumbsucking is very comforting to you and be honest. I say continue what makes you feel good and either ignore the comments or do it where your dad can't see you.

I've managed to hide the fact that I still suck my thumb rather well...or at least, I think I have. My mother has never caught and confronted me, but...I'm sure I've slipped a few times.

I don't know what it is, but the relaxation and such that comes from thumbsucking is unmatched by anything else.

I hope it works out for you...it's just a thumb, not the end of the world, people really need to care less about small things like that.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2007):

Thumbsucking, among adults, is probably the most popular, if stealthy, habit unknown. The reasons are usually simply a matter of habit, nothing more. Unfortunately, most people who don't know this assume that the adult or older thumbsucker has a problem with maturity but, in reality, thumbsucking usually means that the habitual behavior is just a matter of association; you associate certain conditions with the comfortably feeling that sucking your thumb gives you.

For an amazing, detailed website on the subject go to: www.thumbsuckingadults.com

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2007):

Don't worry about it, there's nothing wrong with it. I've had a couple of girlfriends that did it ... my current into her 50's and i think it's very endearing. I taught in a school a few years back and the 17-year-old lad who all the girls fancied, was happy to suck his thumb in class from time to time. All three said it helped them think ... now is your dad against thinking?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2007):

Hey don't worry, there's nothing wrong in sucking your thumb. I find it very hard to sleep without my comforter (waterproof trouser) and I like to suck my thumb from time to time for extra comfort. Just ignore your dad and carry on if you want to.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2007):

There really isnt anything wrong with it but sometimes with others they just dont like it when in public but when at home who cares. Scientificly im a doubtful of teh whole su cking thumb can make your teeth crooked but when my friend got her braces off she was given something in her mouth to stop her from doing it...but she still does. Just try to tone it down but no need to stop if it helps you thats fine

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A female reader, TELLULAH United Kingdom +, writes (6 June 2007):

TELLULAH agony auntMy son is 20, and we have only just stoped from doing this, in public. I know he still does it when he is asleep, or stressed out though. The thing is I never sucked my thumb when I was younger, I had a manky Bear with a funny little coat, that went everywhere with me. I lost the bear and couldnt sleep for a week, I was so upset. Since then, if I am stressed I wake up sucking my thumb. I am 47 by the way, and I dont see why thumb suckers are given such a hard time. I think its kind of sweet.

XX

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A female reader, yasmin_x  +, writes (6 June 2007):

yasmin_x agony auntHey, do not worry about it! Im 19 still suck my thumb when in bed and believe it or not my dad says EXACTLY the same thing, just ignor it!. I have been doing it since I was 2 and I love the feeling, however I do suppose that in the long term, your dad is thinking about you. It does alter your teeth and I do have a slight gap between my bottom and top teeth, which, at sometimes I wish I didn't have, So, do what makes you feel good but do bear in mind it may slighty change your look, and even the colour of your thumb too!

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A female reader, itsME United States +, writes (6 June 2007):

itsME agony auntThere is nothing wrong with sucking your thunb if it helps comfort you and deal with stress... but you should just try to avoid doing it around your dad if he gets so upset about it!!! then eery thing will work out!!! ;-)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2007):

hey hun....there is nothing at all wrong with you having your own way to find comfort. i myself(20 yrs old) still have a blanket and i assured my bf that i intend to keep it forever. its nothing to be ashamed about, but the only thing i might be concerned with is a)germs and b)ur teeth...ive heard that sucking your thumb can cause your teeth to eventually move out of place and become crooked over time

other than that...do what makes you feel the best

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A reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2007):

If people judg you on it. It is their problem not yours. Everyone is entitled to comforts and ways of dealing with stress( hey its better than smoking/overeating!!!) Good luck!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 June 2007):

I confess I have a really bad thumbsucking problem, well it is more of a thumb chewing problem and the more stressed I am, the more I do it. I only ever do it when I am on the computer so nobody sees. I don't think it is a problem, I can think of FAR worse ways of dealing with stress!! PS you might want to watch a movie called "Thumbsucker" admittedly, it's crap. But it is about thumbsucking, :)

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (5 June 2007):

kenny agony auntI do not think you have anything to worry about here, its a comfort thing, you do it in private, its not like you walk round the supermarket doing it.

I still go to bed with this furry blanket cover i have had since i was three, and i can't sleep without it. If sucking your thumb works for you keep doing it.

Good luck x

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A male reader, Jamer70 United Kingdom +, writes (5 June 2007):

Jamer70 agony auntHello There

Stina is complety right, some people have their comforts, like blankets.I have mine and there bad, sucking your thumb is no where near as bad. The only problem is germs that you have from touching things before you suck your thumb. Maybe you should refrain sucking your thumb in front of your dad, then he has no ammo to say these things.

Do what you want

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A male reader, DV1 United States +, writes (5 June 2007):

DV1 agony auntI actually have the whole blanket problem... I always have it with me when I sleep. Don't feel bad. Stina's right-it's your dad.

DV1

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A female reader, stina United States +, writes (5 June 2007):

stina agony auntHello there citizen,

Apart from your thumb maybe having germs on it, I don't see what the big deal is. Everyone has some kind of "quirk" and sucking your thumb is just your's. I know a girl who is 27 that still cannot sleep without her blankie. She works for an insurance company and is extremely successful for her age. Her blankie didn't hold her back, and I don't think your thumb sucking will hold you back, either.

I think your father has some sort of problem, not you. Maybe just refrain from doing it around him, though, at least until you're in your own place. There's no sense in egging him on, even if it does seem and is unfair to you.

Take care.

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