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... Send *tina a private message | | | *tina's profile:Hi, I'm Stina! I've been an agony aunt here on Dear Cupid since July 2006 and became a site moderator the following November. I've not been able to be on here as much as I used to be, but that's because I've just started a new job. Hopefully I'll be able to be on here much more in the future. But for now, it's office work for me during the day!
Anyway, I grew up being very independent and because of that have always been able to work out problems in my life pretty well. My friends have often times come to me to help sort out what they should do in tough situations, as well. Hopefully I'll be able to help you out if you ever need advice, too! ^_^
As for who I "really" am - I'm 26, an atheist, and married. I live in beautiful Charm City, Murderland with my husband, our three hairless chinese crested pups (Ivy, Zoey, and Duncan), one smooshy floofhead dwarf hamster (Budgie; RIP Dr. Sushi T_T) and one huffy hedgehog (Nacho). I'm a quality assurance engineer and a graphic designer. My artwork has been shown all over the world including the US, France, Algeria, Australia and more. ^_^
I'm also addicted to cute animals, japanese pop culture, reggaeton, 80's hip hop and breakdancing (can't do it!, love to watch it!), experimental and avant garde films, food and tattoos (self designed).
If anyone cares to see a "real" picture of me, you can see one here: http://sushi-and-pears.livejournal.com/profile (Check out my uber-cool snob nose! haha) I'm posting this in hopes that other aunts/uncles will post their pictures. I'm always interested to see what all of us actually looks like! ^_^
I have a myspace and a livejournal, so if you want to know anymore about me for some reason I'll post the links. (If you'd like to add me as a friend on either of these, please just message me here or on either site! I've made my accounts private to keep out the weirdos.)
Livejournal: http://sushi-and-pears.livejournal.com |
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How can a 20 y/o guy make his nipples more firm?
Q. Hi. This is a bit odd I know, but anyway here goes! I am a guy in my early 20s. My nipples are really soft and just about never firm. Sometimes they are si soft they are just about flat. Does anyone know what this means or how I can make them ...
A. 16 November 2006: Hey man,
What's the problem? You sound pretty normal to me. I think it would be more of a problem (and actually quite weird) if you had nips poking out of your shirt all the time, don't you? heh... (read in full...)
Ive put on weight and am seeing my boyfriend soon ..help
Q. hi, hope you can help my boyfriend works away and is coming home next thursday the only problem is i have put weight on i dont want him to come back and not fancy me so i was wondering and i no it is stupid but need to if you have any quick diets ...
A. 16 November 2006: Hi Anon,
If you have small meals throughout the day, then it will help you lose weight. I know that a lot of women go on cabbage soup diets to lose weight starting about a week before their weddings so they look slim in their gowns. Cabbage ... (read in full...)
Everyone thinks I'm lying about my bra size!
Q. I have a 30F chest, however it only looks about a 32C, the other day, my friends were going round asking what bra size we all were, and I told one of them she didn't believe me at all. And although i told her not to tell anyone, i think she told ...
A. 15 November 2006: Hi again Anon,
Not to annoy you or anything, but over at the Victoria's Secret that I shop at they have professionals on staff to accurately measure chest size. Maybe a lingerie store by you has the same help available. You could try calling ... (read in full...)
He fingered me with sperm on his hand - now my period is late and I feel bloated!
Q. my boyfriend fingered me about two months ago and he may have had sperm on his finger whilst doing it. i havent had my period since and its never usually late and my tummy is bloated. could i be pregnant?...
A. 15 November 2006: Just so that there is no confusion and so you don't get the facts wrong from the anon poster below, here is a thread on an ob/gyn websites discussing the very thing you are talking about. There are several doctors that state it is possible to ... (read in full...)
He fingered me with sperm on his hand - now my period is late and I feel bloated!
Q. my boyfriend fingered me about two months ago and he may have had sperm on his finger whilst doing it. i havent had my period since and its never usually late and my tummy is bloated. could i be pregnant?...
A. 15 November 2006: Hi Anon,
If he fingered you and sperm was on his finger, then yes, you could be pregnant. (But don't worry yet - you might not be. Sometimes stress can cause late periods and you could feel bloated b/c of pms, etc.)
You should go to you... (read in full...)
I have feelings for my partners brother!
Q. ok here goes!!! My partner and I are very happy but recently have been getting feeling for my partner's brother :( We flirt all the time and have such laughs. He has also admitted his feelings and this is just an awful space to be in. What can I ...
A. 15 November 2006: Hi Anon,
I think that you really need to stop where the relationship is going with your partner's brother. Can you really picture yourself in a relationship with him in the future? Can you imagine how your partner would feel? Would you be able ... (read in full...)
Why the heck are so many people cheating all the time?!
Q. Why do people cheat all the time now? All of the sudden Dear Cupid is flooded with I cheated, or I want to cheat, or affairs from all people, men and women. I used to believe that only guys cheated, but then came across here. What's up with ...
A. 15 November 2006: Hey Anon,
You know, I used to wonder the same thing. But honestly there are so many different situations that sometimes people don't really care about morals. For instance, if someone is in an abusive relationship and is scared into staying,... (read in full...)
I like my partner's friend. How do I tell if she likes me and what do I do?
Q. hi well im in a relationship and been with my partner for a bout 4 or more years,I no longer feel anything for her, but her freind is nother matter, I relly fancy her mate who comes round all the time,The thing is I really cant tell if shes ...
A. 15 November 2006: Hello Mac,
Before you do anything with your partner's friend, I really think that you should either try to figure out what went wrong in your relationship with her and try to fix it, or at least break it off with her before seriously consider... (read in full...)
Everyone thinks I'm lying about my bra size!
Q. I have a 30F chest, however it only looks about a 32C, the other day, my friends were going round asking what bra size we all were, and I told one of them she didn't believe me at all. And although i told her not to tell anyone, i think she told ...
A. 14 November 2006: Hi Anon,
Easy solution: show them one of your bras - the tag will say it all.
Take care.... (read in full...)
I might be pregnant but I am a heavy drinker and regularly do drugs! I don't know what to do!!
Q. Im 17 and I usually only have my period for 5 days but for over two weeks now I have had it. This time I got my period 2 months late. But it is barely there and i only have spotting when i use the washroom or a little through out the day. However I ...
A. 14 November 2006: Here is a really helpful website with tons of info about almost everything pregnancy related. It also has messageboards strickly for pregnancy talk, too, and might have some more info you want to read over:
http:... (read in full...)
I might be pregnant but I am a heavy drinker and regularly do drugs! I don't know what to do!!
Q. Im 17 and I usually only have my period for 5 days but for over two weeks now I have had it. This time I got my period 2 months late. But it is barely there and i only have spotting when i use the washroom or a little through out the day. However I ...
A. 14 November 2006: Hi Anon,
You should really go to your doctor to find out if you're pregnant or not. (The home tests are very accurate, too, if you want to do that first and then have it confirmed by your doctor.) If it turns out that you are pregnant, then you... (read in full...)
Can my hymen be broken since I use tampons?
Q. hey im 18 and iv been using tampons for 3 years now! and i regulaly take part in sports, i was woundring is it possible for my hymen to be broken already?...
A. 8 November 2006: Hello Anon,
I asked my doctor this question a long time ago and she said no, inserting a tampon will not break the hymen. I've also just done some research online and found that most people say that it is possible, but it's very rare (also du... (read in full...)
Would it be wise for me to move in with my bf and his friend?
Q. My boyfriend is refusing to ask his friend to leave the house they share. He has said that i can move in with them. Is this wise?...
A. 3 November 2006: I should add that I wrote the last part thinking you two were on the young side. If you're not, then living all together might not be such a "fun" idea. In that case, I would maybe rethink the idea of moving in together. Maybe you could plan to ... (read in full...)
Would it be wise for me to move in with my bf and his friend?
Q. My boyfriend is refusing to ask his friend to leave the house they share. He has said that i can move in with them. Is this wise?...
A. 3 November 2006: Hi Anon,
Everyone has different experiences when it comes to roommates. In my past experience, I lived with my bf and our best friend. Long story short, after 4 months we were no longer friend with the roommate b/c of personal differen... (read in full...)
I like this guy in college. Is it ok for a girl to ask a guy out?
Q. theres a guy i like on my college course who is several months older than me. I do not want to rush into anything with him, I want to get to know him better first, but I want to do it without making myself look desperare. I like him a lot but i ...
A. 2 November 2006: Hi Anon,
Of course it's okay for a girl to ask a guy out! Why don't you talk about something and see what comes up - like a movie that you two have been wanting to see - then you could see if he wants to go together. Or maybe a band that you... (read in full...)
A friend told him stuff about me and he doesn't want me! I love him..what can I do??
Q. hey...sorry i didnt finish my problem ok ive been with him 6 times and we kept it a secret once and it worked out fine. it was only when i over reacted about something really really small that it fell apart (well we agreed friendship was b...
A. 2 November 2006: Hi SF,
Have you tried talking to him about what was said? Was it lies that your friend told or was it the truth.
If it was lies, then you really need to talk to your friend and get this whole mess straightened out. Talk to her first and fi... (read in full...)
Am I misreading his signals?
Q. I was convinced that my ex still loved me (and so were people on this site) as there were so many signs that pointed that way, but I've found out he's broken up with his girlfriend now. Why has he not got in contact with me? I know he's been ...
A. 2 November 2006: Hi Anon,
I'm wondering if maybe he was confused about his feelings. Maybe he's just taking a break and having some time to himself to figure out what exactly he wants. If he dated this other girl, then he clearly had feelings for her. But sinc... (read in full...)
We broke up and now I think she's going for my best mate!
Q. me n my girlfriend of more then 5 months broke up the other month. she and MY best mate well one of them are really close, but they have been mates longer then i have with him, but i know they even RING eachother, tlak on msn all the time, and a BOY ...
A. 2 November 2006: Hello Anonymous,
Girls and guys can definitly be friends. And if they were friends before, then they should be able to be friends now. If you're worried that they might start dating each other, then you could try talking to your friend and tell... (read in full...)
Does this guy like me?
Q. i cant tell if this guy likes me. these are the signs that people say he does, but i cant be sure. he says he thinks about me during the day randomly and tries to stop but he cant, that he wants to know everything about me, that we are a good ...
A. 2 November 2006: Hi Anon,
I definitly think he likes you...very much! As for where to go from here, I say just see where things take you. Just keep doing things together and having fun with one another and things will sort themselves out. :)
Take care.... (read in full...)
My abusive ex may have changed and told my daughter he's getting married! Was I wrong to move on and to think he didn't change??
Q. ok here goes....I posted a few months ago on how my abusive ex had a new gf and they were soooo in love. Now he has asked our daughter if it's ok if they get married. I am just a mess!!! I am feeling like I missed out cus maybe he did change ...
A. 2 November 2006: Hi Molli,
I don't think what you did was wrong, necessarily - it was just something that you had to do for yourself. I agree with Ponun - he is probably going to be abusive to his new wife. How can someone change in three months with no counseli... (read in full...)
How should I act with this shy guy?
Q. HELP NEEDED ASAP. I am going on a 2nd date tonight with a guy who i like. He says he's interested in me but it doesnt seem like that when we are together. reason for this is he seems withdrawn, shy and doesn't seem to ask me any questions about ...
A. 1 November 2006: Hey again :) Well, from reading your last response, I think the best thing to do is to wait and see if he suggests going out again and what to do. If you guys do decide to go out during the day, then maybe you wouldn't run out of things to talk ... (read in full...)
She was with her new guy and wouldn't even say hi when she passed me...why would she do this?
Q. Hi everyone.. i seen my ex girl friend today after weeks not seeing her. she parks her car at a different car park from me now, but when i seen her today she was with this guy. i was cool about it all, but when she was approaching past me with her ...
A. 1 November 2006: Hi Anonymous,
People deal with breaking up differently. Perhaps your girlfriend can't handle having you in her life at all anymore for some reason. Since I don't know your situation, I can only guess that she was either really hurt over the brea... (read in full...)
My problems overwhelmed my bf and he ended our relationship. I still love him ..what should I do?
Q. My boyfriend told me last night that he couldn't 'put up' with me anymore and wanted our relationship over. He said he believed I had too many problems and was always moaning all the time. I have suffered from agoraphobia for a couple of years ...
A. 1 November 2006: Hi Anon,
If your boyfriend said that you were "moaning all the time," I have to ask you - do YOU think you were moaning all the time? If you are still having a problem with agoraphobia, then perhaps you should see a therapist (or continue... (read in full...)
HAd sex with a guy who went too deep. Two months later sex with another guy hurt like hell! Did I get damaged?
Q. please help!! i had sex with this guy one time and when we did he shoved hard, deep, and fast in me. i was sore for a week. 2 months later i had intercourse with someone else, he was gentle but when he went deep it really really hurt. did the first ...
A. 1 November 2006: Hey Anon,
Like the other aunts, I have to say I think you should see your doctor. Try to make the appointment soon - see if there are any cancelations from anyone else for anytime soon - preferably today. The sooner you see the doctor, the soon... (read in full...)
My online guy wants to meet me...I don't know what to do.
Q. i have been talking to a guy on MSN for about 2 weeks now..online we seem to really connect and he says he can't get me out of his head and he really likes me, he also has hinted about meeting in person but hasn't put any pressure on me..im 16 and ...
A. 1 November 2006: Hi Crazy-Green,
There are a lot of weirdos on the internet. Before you meet up with this person, I suggest finding out more about him. But that's assuming he's telling you the truth about himself - his name, age, etc. Personally, I wouldn't... (read in full...)
Hours before my Mother's funeral the man I love, is texting another woman tell her 'she is hot!"! What should I do?
Q. hi i dont really know if you could call this a problem, i suppose its quite obvious what i should do but i really just need someone to say it! Ok, so i'm 21 and everything has been great with my boyfriend lately, we've had our arguements in the past ...
A. 1 November 2006: Hi Anon,
Please accept my deepest sympathy for the passing of your mother. Your boyfriend should have said something similar instead of trying to keep your emotions away from him by not asking how you were feeling. I'm sorry for that, too. Yo... (read in full...)
Why do girls say yes to a date but they also say "don't tell anyone" What's up with that, girls?
Q. I don't get it. Does it just happen to me or do other guys get it too. Whenever I ask out a girl she says yes... but dont tell any one. Any girls here that can explain why?...
A. 1 November 2006: I meant to write "Hey *IWLI*,"
sorry!) :)... (read in full...)
Why do girls say yes to a date but they also say "don't tell anyone" What's up with that, girls?
Q. I don't get it. Does it just happen to me or do other guys get it too. Whenever I ask out a girl she says yes... but dont tell any one. Any girls here that can explain why?...
A. 1 November 2006: Hey ISLI,
If a girl says don't tell anyone about going on a date with her, then I would seriously reconsider going out with someone who sounds so shallow. I would NEVER say that to anyone that I cared enough about to go on a date with! That's a... (read in full...)
How do I find out if he's gay
Q. I'm an in-the-closet gay guy. I met this guy that I REALLY REALLY like (perhaps love at first sight?). He's gorgeous, smart, etc. but the only problem is I don't know if he's gay. How do I find out if he's gay \ bi without scaring him away?...
A. 1 November 2006: Oh, I'm sorry that my advice wasn't helpful to you. But perhaps if you maintain a relationship with him then you'll be able to find out. I understand how frustrated you might feel - I've been in that position, too. But at least if you keep ... (read in full...)
Tomorrow I lose my virginity.
Q. on thursday, november 2nd, i will be losing my virginity to my ex girlfriend, and I am nervous, but in an extremely good way, because i know it is right for both of us. is there anything i can do to stop the nervousness? i smoke cigarettes, so maybe ...
A. 1 November 2006: Hi Anon,
I have to agree with the others - why are you going to have sex with your ex girlfriend? If it were really "right for both of us" then why isn't she *still* your girlfriend? I hope you don't think that having sex with her will make you... (read in full...)
Update! He's still work obsessed! This is still stressing me out. More advice?
Q. Hi, my name is Natasha and I'm 25 from Birmingham, West Midlands, UK, I originally wrote: ----------------------------------------------------- My name's Natasha, I'm 25 and my husband is 28. Recently he's become obsessed with work, refusing to s...
A. 31 October 2006: Hi Natasha,
Well, it *is* your business that he is spending all of his time at work because it's putting a strain on your relationship. He needs to realize that, and since he's obviously in denial maybe it's time that you two seek couples ... (read in full...)
What does it mean when a girl ......
Q. Ladies. what does it mean when a girl smiles at you and sits next to you even if there are other seats...
A. 31 October 2006: Hey Anon,
It probably means that she likes you. :)... (read in full...)
He is coming to stay with me for the weekend but is seeing some other girl
Q. Ok, The guy of my dreams is coming to stay at my house for the weekend. Neither of us are into flings, and he has told me he likes me, and i like him a lot.. he has made a move on me a few times before, and i have always said no, thinking i was his ...
A. 31 October 2006: Hi Anon,
Instead of trying any moves on him when he visits, why don't you try telling him what you posted? Knowing your feelings about him might speak volumes more than anything else. My guess is that if he is seeing someone else and doesn't ... (read in full...)
How do I find out if he's gay
Q. I'm an in-the-closet gay guy. I met this guy that I REALLY REALLY like (perhaps love at first sight?). He's gorgeous, smart, etc. but the only problem is I don't know if he's gay. How do I find out if he's gay \ bi without scaring him away?...
A. 31 October 2006: Hi Geqo,
Since you don't want to ask him yourself, I suggest seeing if he has a personal website, like a myspace. Lots of times people write their sexual orientation on their page. There's also the option of asking a mutual friend (if you guys... (read in full...)
How should I act with this shy guy?
Q. HELP NEEDED ASAP. I am going on a 2nd date tonight with a guy who i like. He says he's interested in me but it doesnt seem like that when we are together. reason for this is he seems withdrawn, shy and doesn't seem to ask me any questions about ...
A. 31 October 2006: Hi X - If you don't want to keep doing the same things over and over, maybe you guys could see what else there is to do in your area. Maybe go out during the day to like lunch and a museum or go to a park (or whatever else you guys might be ... (read in full...)
How should I act with this shy guy?
Q. HELP NEEDED ASAP. I am going on a 2nd date tonight with a guy who i like. He says he's interested in me but it doesnt seem like that when we are together. reason for this is he seems withdrawn, shy and doesn't seem to ask me any questions about ...
A. 31 October 2006: Hi X - If you don't want to keep doing the same things over and over, maybe you guys could see what else there is to do in your area. Maybe go out during the day to like lunch and a museum or go to a park (or whatever else you guys might be ... (read in full...)
Do I tell her or wait or wait for an exs cousin to tell her??
Q. My mother had my ex boyfriend arrested when I was 16. He was 20. He was mad at me for a little while for her finding out. I live with my grandmother nad I still sneak around just to see him. My birthday is in 12 days and I won't have to worry about ...
A. 31 October 2006: Hey Red,
Are you sure you really have feelings for this guy, or is it because you like the thrill of being with a guy who is already taken? I really think you ought to walk away from this guy.
If you really want to have him, though, then I w... (read in full...)
My bf doesn't like my pubic hair! How do I go baout shaving it off?
Q. I am a 17 year old girl and i am afraid to shave my pubic hair. My boyfriend doesn't like it and i find it embarrassing but im afraid in case i cut myself or it hurts. How do i go about it?...
A. 31 October 2006: Hey Anon,
Adding on to what Lemonpixie suggested:
If you're comfortable getting it waxed, then you could go have the hair removed by a professional (check the locals salons by your house). It will sting at first, but it stays smooth an averag... (read in full...)
Last year...I liked him but he didn't like me. Now he likes me...should I like him again?
Q. i used to like this guy last year but he didnt really like me then. so i stopped liking him,but now hes telling me that he likes me. should i start liking him again?...
A. 31 October 2006: Hi Anonymous,
If you like him, then I say that's great. But I don't think it would be a wise decision to "force" yourself to like him. If you do that, it might cause a heap of problems in the future like resentment, etc.
My suggestion is to... (read in full...)
I lost my virginity and found out sex with my bf doesn't do it for me. Is this normal?
Q. I lost my virginity, to my boyfriend a couple of weeks ago, we've had sex twice since then. He enjoys it but it doesn't do anything for me, is this normal? ...
A. 30 October 2006: Hi Anon,
For many girls, having sex the first few times is more uncomfortable than it is pleasureable. The more you keep having sex, the better it will feel.
You should also talk to your boyfriend about how you two are having sex. Maybe the ... (read in full...)
How should I act with this shy guy?
Q. HELP NEEDED ASAP. I am going on a 2nd date tonight with a guy who i like. He says he's interested in me but it doesnt seem like that when we are together. reason for this is he seems withdrawn, shy and doesn't seem to ask me any questions about ...
A. 30 October 2006: Hi Anon,
Glad to hear things went well! If he hasn't called you or anything since that night, it wouldn't be out of line to call him up. If you really like him and he likes you, then he would probably be happy to hear from you. You also say... (read in full...)
How should I act with this shy guy?
Q. HELP NEEDED ASAP. I am going on a 2nd date tonight with a guy who i like. He says he's interested in me but it doesnt seem like that when we are together. reason for this is he seems withdrawn, shy and doesn't seem to ask me any questions about ...
A. 26 October 2006: Hi Anon,
When he answers the questions about himself, you could use that as a lead into something about you. That might make him want to ask more questions.
Maybe he doesn't know if he should be asking you something - he might not want to scar... (read in full...)
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