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*annieseds agony aunt

*annieseds

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*annieseds's profile:

I'm a fun-lovin 24 year old chick from the bottom of the world - New Zealand.

I recently celebrated 5 beautiful years with my boy, and of course nothing is smooth sailing but we have come out on top and are looking sooo forward to waking up for morning cuddles together for the rest of our days.

If anyone wants advice on how we survived 2 years long-distance across 16,000 miles, please message me and I'll give you any advice I can!

"Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it without knowing what is going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity."

123456Next > [6 pages, 188 answers]

I've got loads of horrid stretch marks. How did they come and how can I get rid of them?

Q.   I've got loads of horrid stretch marks. How did they come and how can I get rid of them? they're on most parts of my body like my arms and legs and i can't wear sleeve-less t-shirts because they will show :( it's really embarassing! please tell me...

A.   10 May 2007: Hey sweet pea... Take a look at this website http://www.bio-oil.info/en/home - you can't get rid of them completely, but you can make them almost invisible by using Bio Oil. xxx... (read in full...)

We talk about marriage all the time but still no proposal after 7 years together!

Q.   7 years into a relationship and no proposal... I don't know what to do. up until last year I have had no real urge to get married but since hitting 34 I just feel a need to settle. My boyfriend and I get on brilliantly. We've travelled a lot ...

A.   8 May 2007: Hi there, I also think you need to sit down and write a list of WHY marriage is important to you. You want to go away for a weekend and show your BF how serious you are about wanting to get married? What is the desired effect you want from him... (read in full...)

Should we stay together when he goes to university or just break up?

Q.   Hey, I was hoping if someone could give me advice. I dont really know what to do. My boyfriend is going off to uni in about 4-5 months. We've been going out for quite a while, and we've been discussing what to do whether to: stay together when he ...

A.   6 May 2007: Hi there. Long distance relationships DO work! You just have to have a very stable and trusting foundation before you can even consider it. You are very young to be thinking about long-distance because it is one of the hardest things to do if ... (read in full...)

I BF just broke up with me after telling me for the last 7 months how much he wants to marry me!

Q.   Hello, I need some subjective advice from people who don't know me or my situation. My boyfriend broke up with me yesterday morning, a few minutes before I had to go off to a work shift. I got to work and burst into tears and had to go home, wh...

A.   5 May 2007: Hi there you poor soul.. Something awry is going on with him. This seems very odd if he has been telling you and showing you the complete opposite for the past 7 months. Do you think something could have happened at his work? With his family? ... (read in full...)

I heard that one can get pregnant without even having intercourse! What about grinding?

Q.   I have heard from some that you can actully get pregnant, without even having intercourse, just by example: grinding at a party...is this truley true cause it is making me nervous around my bf now cause im not sure. Thanks...

A.   19 April 2007: Hmm. Okay. So is this a 'special' party? Do you all grind without your clothes on? If you do then, um, random but each to their own. Or if you are actually thinking you can get pregnant without taking your clothes off, then wouldn't everyone get ... (read in full...)

I can't orgasm and I know it bothers him! I'm frustrated..what is wrong with me?

Q.   dear cupid, i have bin with my amazing boyfriend for 11 months now. we are very much in love.we trust each other 1000% we have done pretty much everything other than actual sex becuase we decided to wait until i was on the pill and there are ...

A.   19 April 2007: Hey sweetness.. As the saying goes, good things take time. But when you just wanna feel the ultimate pleasure of an orgasm you have only heard about, I understand that quote is just bullshit! So what to do. Okay, so how do you feel each time you... (read in full...)

I have just found out my boyfriend of 5 years has been looking at pictures of naked girls.

Q.   I found out my boyfriend of 5 years is looking at pictures of naked girls does that mean he is cheating. does he still love me....

A.   3 April 2007: Hey there, I would only be worried if he has just started doing this. You have been together 5 years, has he always looked @ pictures like this? Or is it a more recent thing? If it is more recent, then I think you do need to question him. Wh... (read in full...)

SITE NEWS: Had DearCupid changed your life in a positive way? I want to hear your stories...

Q.   Has DearCupid changed your life in a positive way? If so, please let me know. Either post here (anon if you prefer) or send me a private mail. Sometimes when I'm coding at midnight or tinkering with an errant database, or wondering wh...

A.   2 March 2007: Andrew - you are awesome! The very simple fact that you had the idea to start a site like this shows what an awesomely, caring, onto-it guy you are, and the fact that it has sky-rocketed to where it is today really leaves me speechless. The l... (read in full...)

Wanted: Your feedback and ideas for DearCupid... !

Q.   Hi I'm looking for your feedback and ideas for DearCupid. Either reply to this thread or send me a private mail :-) Got an idea for a new feature? Want to tell me what works well? What's not up to scratch? If you're in the UK hope you're n...

A.   15 February 2007: Oh sorry, another thing... Is it possible to add a function (right word?) that allows us to see the age group of the question asker when we moderate the question? I think that would be really useful. :o)... (read in full...)

Wanted: Your feedback and ideas for DearCupid... !

Q.   Hi I'm looking for your feedback and ideas for DearCupid. Either reply to this thread or send me a private mail :-) Got an idea for a new feature? Want to tell me what works well? What's not up to scratch? If you're in the UK hope you're n...

A.   15 February 2007: Hey Andy... How about under our personal pages we could have a blog? I know how many blog websites are out there now, but perhaps this could be something that is specifically related to relationship advice we feel strongly about or know a lot ab... (read in full...)

I flirted with someone, felt him and he rubbed my breasts, is this classed as cheating?

Q.   Hi I need your help, I love my boyfriend to bits, I would do anything for him. Last year I flirted with a guy I knew, my boyfriend is ok with me flirting, but I let him touch my breasts and I rubbed him. I NEVER kissed him or had sexual intercour...

A.   14 February 2007: Actually, I wanted to clarify something. This kind of behaviour isn't acceptable in ANY kind of relationship, loving or on the brink of breaking-up. Even if you aren't happy in your relationship, you don't cheat on someone! You break up with ... (read in full...)

I flirted with someone, felt him and he rubbed my breasts, is this classed as cheating?

Q.   Hi I need your help, I love my boyfriend to bits, I would do anything for him. Last year I flirted with a guy I knew, my boyfriend is ok with me flirting, but I let him touch my breasts and I rubbed him. I NEVER kissed him or had sexual intercour...

A.   14 February 2007: Yup, I completely agree with Eddie here - I am taken aback by the other answers too! You are not single, so this kind of behaviour is NOT acceptable when you are in a loving relationship! ... (read in full...)

Why doesn't my new husband ever want to have sex with me?

Q.   My husband and I are young (22-24) and newly married (just over 1yr) and it seems like he doesn't want to have sex. No kids, We cuddle, lay in bed naked every night, go out on date nights, talk all the time, and do the massages often. I've even ...

A.   14 February 2007: Hey sweetie, Congrats on your marriage by the way. So you are doing nothing wrong and everything right to try and get him in the mood it seems. Good on you for trying so many different things and for wanting to keep the passion alive. But it i... (read in full...)

I flirted with someone, felt him and he rubbed my breasts, is this classed as cheating?

Q.   Hi I need your help, I love my boyfriend to bits, I would do anything for him. Last year I flirted with a guy I knew, my boyfriend is ok with me flirting, but I let him touch my breasts and I rubbed him. I NEVER kissed him or had sexual intercour...

A.   14 February 2007: Hi there, CD206 is right, we are not the ones to tell you, you have to work it out for yourself. All we can do is give you our opinions. My opinion - you cheated. Flirting and sexually touching anyone else is cheating, it doesn't matter i... (read in full...)

My BF of 5 years just can't compromise and I think I want to end it!

Q.   Should I finish with my boyfriend? I planned with my boyfriend to do something this weekend for our 5 year anniversary. But then he got invited to a stag-do weekend, so we cancelled it. I thought at least we can spend valentines together, but th...

A.   14 February 2007: Hi there, I agree with the first poster. You didn't say you weren't happy with all of this! You HAVE to communicate your feelings with him! You said you planned to do something special on your 5-year anniversary, but if he had known how importan... (read in full...)

What should I write in his Valentine's card? Any sugesstions?

Q.   I don't know what to write in the valentines card I got for my boyfriend.Because he has already given me mine,and he had written a long sweet note plus a poem on the inside. I dont want to write a note that sounds stupid but i want to get the point ...

A.   14 February 2007: Hi there... There are just so many ways to express love, here are a few ideas... "I never thought I could feel this way about anyone. You are the most amazing, charsismatic person I have ever met and I am so blessed to have you in my life". ... (read in full...)

In a fit of anger I slapped him! I regret it so much and I apologised but now he is distant. How can I put things right again?

Q.   I am in a complicated situation at present. Two years ago I had a beautiful baby boy. The situation with my little boy's biological father hasn't been good, nor was the ending of our relationship while I was pregnant(he cheated). I started dating ...

A.   14 February 2007: Hey girl, The 13th February last year I did worse than you - I punched my boyfriend repeately in the face ( I was drunk and provoked ) and I thought he would never forgive me. But he did. You slapping him isn't nearly as bad as that and I know e... (read in full...)

In a fit of anger I slapped him! I regret it so much and I apologised but now he is distant. How can I put things right again?

Q.   I am in a complicated situation at present. Two years ago I had a beautiful baby boy. The situation with my little boy's biological father hasn't been good, nor was the ending of our relationship while I was pregnant(he cheated). I started dating ...

A.   14 February 2007: Hey girl, The 13th February last year I did worse than you - I punched my boyfriend repeately in the face ( I was drunk and provoked ) and I thought he would never forgive me. But he did. You slapping him isn't nearly as bad as that and I know e... (read in full...)

Are there guys out there, that don't look at other pretty women when they are with me?

Q.   my ex really did not care to look at other females- I know this because every time we were together and even when females in bikinis passed by he really only concentrated on me and didn't care to look.... he wasnt interested at all... my new ...

A.   12 February 2007: Hey there, I think very similar to you - the love of our life should have eyes only for us and no one else. I have battled with this concept for many years now and right up until late last year I was adament that if I caught my boyfriend of 6 yea... (read in full...)

Should I be worried about his porn viewing? We're getting married next year...

Q.   My partner looks at porn every day.When I confronted him about it, he showed no emotion at all and just replied;it doesn't mean anything. Its you I want to be with. I'm pretty relaxed about things but feel odd about him spending so much time lookin...

A.   8 February 2007: No Martini, this is what this site is for really. Debating is healthy right? This person has asked the question and has gotten 2 complete sides of the coin answers, which, I think, will help her make her mind up what to do about her situation more ... (read in full...)

Why does he have pics of this scantily-clad woman, he has never even met?

Q.   I looked in my bf's phone (i know it was wrong, and i admit that), but he had pics of a scantily dressed woman, who he labeled and saved the pics. he had pics before of her, when we first started the relationship, and i know its the same woman due ...

A.   6 February 2007: Hey there, I agree with you, if he is happy and content with his relationship with you, then there is no need for him to have these pictures in his phone. I don't think he has been completely honest with you. He needs to open up and tell... (read in full...)

He dumped me but still wants to be friends! Why?

Q.   Why would a guy who dumped you want to remain friends? My ex was my best friend but not long after we went out together, and particularly after we had sex, he lost all interest in me and became quite mean, but now he has been saying he wants to be ...

A.   17 January 2007: Hey there... I think the reason is because he doesn't want to lose what you had BEFORE you slept together. Maybe he was hoping for fireworks and everything when you tried dating, and some friendships can turn into that, but some don't either. ... (read in full...)

After his amputation he uses cannibis several times a night and I hate it!

Q.   my husband and i have been together for 6 years, been married for 7 months, have a 4 year old son and a baby due in 3 weeks. we have had hard years, my husband was in an accident and wasnt able to work for a year due to amputation, i have stuck by ...

A.   17 January 2007: Hey there, Firstly, I'm sorry to hear of your husbands accident. That must have been really hard but shows what a supportive and loving person you are to stand by him the way you have. Good on you for sticking by your marriage vows when a lot of... (read in full...)

SITE NEWS: Two new features - country flags and similar questions!

Q.   Hi everyone Two updates: 1. COUNTRY FLAGS! You can now set where you are writing from and get a flag appear next to your answers and your column! Click on the your account link when logged in and select "set your country". All new users ...

A.   15 January 2007: Awesome Andrew! Those flags are soooo cute! And amazingly wonderful that you included New Zealand in the 'top 6' !!! I feel spesh as! hehehee. ... (read in full...)

I like to please myself because I don't have a boyfriend. Am I normal?

Q.   dear cupid i dont have a boyfriend so i like 2 masterbate. Am i normal? I feel weird afterwards but it makes me feel better about myself. wat shud i do? shud i stop masterbating? please help me xoxoxo...

A.   11 January 2007: Hey there, Do you feel weird because you think you're doing something wrong? You most certainly aren't! Enjoy yourself and push those doubting thoughts from your mind...I bet if you do that the next time you 'have a play' you will find it will ... (read in full...)

What is the point to relationships if they always end in tragedy?

Q.   I'm 20 and might be starting to date women. You'll probably notice the "might be". The reason why is that I would like to have a relationship with a women, yet everywhere I look it just ends in catastrophe. People getting divorces, people having ...

A.   10 January 2007: You have to live and learn. How can anyone possibly live their life without risk? Every single thing you do in life entails the risk of a bad outcome, but how will you know, the outcome could be more than you ever hope for, if you don't try? ... (read in full...)

He clams up when I try to talk to him about our issues!

Q.   Wheneva my boyfriend and i argue, it never gets resolved. We Just carry on like normal. I always try to discuss why we argued etc, tell him he hurt me, but he wont talk about anything. refuses. tells me 'whatever' and gets really annoyed, and then ...

A.   19 December 2006: Hey girl, If he loves you he will WANT to work things out with you. It could just be that he doesn't have the tools to know how to deal with situations like this. Perhaps a little cliched but the "Men are from mars, women are from venus" ... (read in full...)

Does taking a 'break' from relationship help?

Q.   hi everyone, just wondering.. do you think taking a break from a relationship helps ? ...

A.   12 December 2006: I agree with Dr Pete on this one. It sucks big time that your relationship reaches a point where one of you puts out the 'lets take a break' idea out there, but if you love each other that much, then yes, it can be the best thing for the relation... (read in full...)

I'm glad my boyfriend is out of prison... but drinking makes him more paranoid than ever!

Q.   Hi, I guess I'm just really confused at the moment and would like an impartial view on things! I've posted on here before and had some really kind words and useful advice. Basically... (here goes!)... My boyfriend has been in prison for the l...

A.   7 December 2006: Hi there, You poor soul. I know what it is like to be on the receiving end of drunken abuse and it ain't pretty, especially when you have done nothing to warrant that abuse! This is entirely his problem, you do understand that right? Basi... (read in full...)

Could this be her christmas present?

Q.   there's a christmas ball in 1week at my school. i want to go with my friend. she hasn't got the money but she is dyin to go. i am willing to pay for her ticket and dress. but she will never let me. so i've already paid for the tickets for her and ...

A.   5 December 2006: Awwww....I like your style! Any girl would be over the moon to have a guy like you wanting to make them feel as special as you want this girl to feel! If she doesn't really want to accept only because she feels bad it is your money, then you ... (read in full...)

I just want to be single, experience dating

Q.   I have got a big problem. I have been married for just a year... but together for 5 years. We have gone through alot of ups and downs, emotionally, financially, mentally... but have always managed to come out stronger. I love this man, and he...

A.   5 December 2006: Hey love, I have been in a relationship for 5.5 years and I know exactly how you feel. You have given your everything - heart, soul, being - to this man and he has done the same to you. Sometimes I get scared that I'll fuck it up too. Okay...... (read in full...)

My BF hit me across the face when all I was doing was joking around - will he do it again?

Q.   I love my boyfriend so much but the other day he hit me across the face when i was pretending to pull his pants down. It was suposed to be a joke. I ran of crying after that shocked and hurt. He has apologised so much but should i be worried he ...

A.   16 November 2006: Hey there, I disagree with the advice below, mainly because I think we need more information from you before we can give ANY advice at all. I'm not saying I condone violence, but we need more info. How long have you been together? H... (read in full...)

I am so scared this beautiful love we share will eventually end!

Q.   I've been seeing my bf (23) since the end of January. We both said i love you to each other, he said it first, i did it 2 weeks later in August. I feel like i fall more in love with him everyday, and I find it heartbreaking sometimes when we have ...

A.   8 November 2006: Hey there, What you are experiencing is completely normal when you find that one person whom you can see spending the rest of your days with and growing old with. Your heart feels like it it bursting and then all of a sudden you get very scared t... (read in full...)

We made a plan but he never called or showed up!

Q.   I have been dating someone for a few weeks. He asked me to be exclusive. I called him to ask him if we still had planned for that night. He said yes he wanted to go eat and dancing. He would call me after he ate and got a shower. He never called or ...

A.   8 November 2006: Hi there, How can we, strangers from around the world, possibly know why you're BF didn't show up? Only HE can answer that. Maybe something happened/came up suddenly. ALWAYS give those you care about the benefit of the doubt before jum... (read in full...)

I get homesick very easily. What can be done about this?

Q.   im 15 and when i stay out i get homesick its so embarassing what can i do to put an end 2 this ive tried ringin my parents at night and a photo but it just makes me worse or doesnt change it at all...

A.   2 November 2006: Hey girl, I went through exactly the same thing when I was your age, honest! I used to love the idea of staying over at my friends places, but as the night went on, I used to get so anxious and want nothing but my mum! I used to call them in ... (read in full...)

Are very long distance relationships possible? I'd like to hear some success stories from people!

Q.   Just wondering, how many people here have success stories regarding HUGE distances (like different countries)? Is it even possible?...

A.   2 November 2006: Hi again, Thank you for the congratulations! We, of course like any couple, go through our ups and downs, but we always take it back into perspective and think how long we waited for each other at the beginning of our relationship. The fact tha... (read in full...)

Brotherly love

Q.   I have been involved in a sexual relationship with my younger brother for nearly twenty years now. We first had sex when he was twelve and I sixteen. I became pregnant with his child and gave birth to a healthy baby boy. Unsure as to what I should ...

A.   2 November 2006: There are most certainly NOT moves in my country to make this kind of thing legal! I just wanted to clarify that.... (read in full...)

Are very long distance relationships possible? I'd like to hear some success stories from people!

Q.   Just wondering, how many people here have success stories regarding HUGE distances (like different countries)? Is it even possible?...

A.   2 November 2006: Hi there, It most certainly IS possible! You just have to find a person who is as committed to you as you are to them, have the same or similar values, believes in your love enough to wait for however long until you return and has a spare am... (read in full...)

Is there any way I can convince my gf to try anal sex? I want to see how it feels!

Q.   My girlfriend and i have been going out a while. She told me that she would never have anal sex. Is there anything i can do to convice her to try it? I just want to experience it and see how it feels. I just don't know how to make her want to ...

A.   30 October 2006: Hi there, I was in the same position as you, except my boyfriend was the one who didn't want to try it and swore he never ever would! I didn't pressure him, but casually dropped into a sexual conversation we were having oneday that I would li... (read in full...)

Do guys enjoy giving a girl oral and whats the best way to go, shaved or not?

Q.   Hi, my boyfriend tried to give me oral but i just wasnt ready so we didnt go through w/ it. Well actually the thing is we've been together a year and we have an awesome relationship but that is one thing that i've never done so i dont know what to ...

A.   5 October 2006: Hey girl, Pleased to hear that you have waited until you are completely ready before you went ahead and let your BF do this! Credit to you for that! Trimmed up real nice is the best way to go, in my opinion. Make sure you have a shower be... (read in full...)

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