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... Send *tina a private message | | | *tina's profile:Hi, I'm Stina! I've been an agony aunt here on Dear Cupid since July 2006 and became a site moderator the following November. I've not been able to be on here as much as I used to be, but that's because I've just started a new job. Hopefully I'll be able to be on here much more in the future. But for now, it's office work for me during the day!
Anyway, I grew up being very independent and because of that have always been able to work out problems in my life pretty well. My friends have often times come to me to help sort out what they should do in tough situations, as well. Hopefully I'll be able to help you out if you ever need advice, too! ^_^
As for who I "really" am - I'm 26, an atheist, and married. I live in beautiful Charm City, Murderland with my husband, our three hairless chinese crested pups (Ivy, Zoey, and Duncan), one smooshy floofhead dwarf hamster (Budgie; RIP Dr. Sushi T_T) and one huffy hedgehog (Nacho). I'm a quality assurance engineer and a graphic designer. My artwork has been shown all over the world including the US, France, Algeria, Australia and more. ^_^
I'm also addicted to cute animals, japanese pop culture, reggaeton, 80's hip hop and breakdancing (can't do it!, love to watch it!), experimental and avant garde films, food and tattoos (self designed).
If anyone cares to see a "real" picture of me, you can see one here: http://sushi-and-pears.livejournal.com/profile (Check out my uber-cool snob nose! haha) I'm posting this in hopes that other aunts/uncles will post their pictures. I'm always interested to see what all of us actually looks like! ^_^
I have a myspace and a livejournal, so if you want to know anymore about me for some reason I'll post the links. (If you'd like to add me as a friend on either of these, please just message me here or on either site! I've made my accounts private to keep out the weirdos.)
Livejournal: http://sushi-and-pears.livejournal.com |
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Is there life after death? Is there hell and heaven? Is there reincarnation? Do we wake-up, and find out we're all aliens?
Q. hey this is a very wide question but hopefully itll mean i get more peoples opinions on it!! what you think happens when people die, is there life after death? my dad died recently and i cant help thinking whats happened to him so i'd like to know...
A. 28 February 2007: Actually - I just changed my mind...if you want to visit the discussion and debate sites, by all means I think you should do that. It might help you to come to a decision in what you are as far as religion/nonreligion/philosophies are concerned. ... (read in full...)
Is there life after death? Is there hell and heaven? Is there reincarnation? Do we wake-up, and find out we're all aliens?
Q. hey this is a very wide question but hopefully itll mean i get more peoples opinions on it!! what you think happens when people die, is there life after death? my dad died recently and i cant help thinking whats happened to him so i'd like to know...
A. 28 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
It shouldn't matter what anyone else thinks when it comes to something as personal as what you believe as far as religion (and all the things that go with it) are concerned. What matters is that you have researched and found an... (read in full...)
Is it okay to give a gift card to someone instead of an actual gift?
Q. Hi..I wanted to ask if giving a gift card instead of an actual gift is considered good form. Because, in my opinion, it is very impersonal and shows that you couldn't be bothered enough to take the time to put some thought into getting the person ...
A. 28 February 2007: You're welcome ^_^ I've actually wondered what others thought about this, too, but never thought to actually ask. heh... (read in full...)
Do I cut his cell phone off or let him keep paying for it?
Q. when me and my ex boyfriend were together-i added him a cell phone line to my account.we broke up 2 months later.he pays his part of the bill on time every month still like he sussposed to. the thing is i just found out that he cheated on me with ...
A. 28 February 2007: Hello Anon,
I personally think that if you two aren't together then he shouldn't be listed as part of your plan regardless of if he cheated or not.
Because - like dragonette said - if he refuses to pay his portion of the bill at some point, t... (read in full...)
Is these advice sites for real?
Q. NEED ASSURANCE FROM AGONY AUNTS.. I came across some material that said that some of the information or questions that are posted on sites like this (dearcupid.org) are made up so as to make them popular. Also the information displayed is not...
A. 28 February 2007: Hey Anonymous, Well, I'm sure that some questions aren't real that are posted here. But it's impossible for moderators to always know which questions are fake, and we don't want anyone to not receive advice if they really need it. So while so... (read in full...)
Is it okay to give a gift card to someone instead of an actual gift?
Q. Hi..I wanted to ask if giving a gift card instead of an actual gift is considered good form. Because, in my opinion, it is very impersonal and shows that you couldn't be bothered enough to take the time to put some thought into getting the person ...
A. 24 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
I think that most people would think getting a gift card wouldn't be as nice as getting a regular gift. I know that my husband hates gift cards. Like you, he thinks they're really impersonal. But I, on the other hand, absolute... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to go with a prostitute to make yourself feel better?
Q. Is it wrong to go to a prostitute to make yourself feel better?...
A. 23 February 2007: Hi again Anonymous,
In that case, I don't think it'd be a good decision to go to a prostitute. If you want to feel better, perhaps you should try to talk to someone about the pain you're going through and get everything out in the open. Talking ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to go with a prostitute to make yourself feel better?
Q. Is it wrong to go to a prostitute to make yourself feel better?...
A. 23 February 2007: Hi Anon,
Feel better in what way? If it's purely sexual, then I don't see a problem with it. You two would be consenting adults and therefore there should be no problem.
If it's to feel better on an emotional level, I don't think this is a ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to become pregnant when you're on your period?
Q. At the risk of sounding really stupid is it possible to become pregnant when you are on your period? i have always thought it was the same as when your not but my bf says it isnt. is the chance less likely? am i wrong? or is he? xxx...
A. 22 February 2007: Hello Katz,
Like it has already been stated, there is less of a chance that you will get pregnant during your period, but it can ***DEFINITLY*** still happen.
Since you aren't happy with any of the answers you're getting here, I suggest callin... (read in full...)
Can a born again christian and an aethiest marry? I'm really wondering whether this would work or just cause problems.
Q. Can an Born again christian and an Atheist marry? I've been with my girlfriend for near 10 months now and we have very strong feelings for each other. I am an atheist but I hide under the title of a catholic. I don't believe in Satan, I simply ...
A. 21 February 2007: (my link for "The End of Faith" book won't stay posted for some reason and I've tried a couple of times. Oh, well. I guess you can just look it up on amazon. heh)... (read in full...)
Can a born again christian and an aethiest marry? I'm really wondering whether this would work or just cause problems.
Q. Can an Born again christian and an Atheist marry? I've been with my girlfriend for near 10 months now and we have very strong feelings for each other. I am an atheist but I hide under the title of a catholic. I don't believe in Satan, I simply ...
A. 21 February 2007: Hi again J, (You sound a lot like me! I grew up Catholic and stopped going to my confirmation classes because my parents decided they'd leave it up to me. I didn't start reading up on other religions, atheism, etc until about 6 years ago, thoug... (read in full...)
My ex and her new bf are always kissing in my face! What do I do??
Q. ok so, my Ex girl-friend has a new lad. They're always kissing etc. which sounds ok, but they always do it in my face. What do I do? any ideas?...
A. 21 February 2007: Hi Stu,
I think the more you ignore her, the more she'll get bored with the ridiculous game she's trying to play. Of course it's going to bother you until she stops, you're human! Just try not to let her know her actions are getting to you. Wa... (read in full...)
Can a born again christian and an aethiest marry? I'm really wondering whether this would work or just cause problems.
Q. Can an Born again christian and an Atheist marry? I've been with my girlfriend for near 10 months now and we have very strong feelings for each other. I am an atheist but I hide under the title of a catholic. I don't believe in Satan, I simply ...
A. 21 February 2007: To the anonymous poster below:
"Ummm ok, why is there a website on people who don't believe in God??"
To be informative on various topics of atheism. duh. lol
"If they don't beleive in God and have to assert themselves over people w... (read in full...)
Can a born again christian and an aethiest marry? I'm really wondering whether this would work or just cause problems.
Q. Can an Born again christian and an Atheist marry? I've been with my girlfriend for near 10 months now and we have very strong feelings for each other. I am an atheist but I hide under the title of a catholic. I don't believe in Satan, I simply ...
A. 21 February 2007: Hi there Uncle J, I totally understand where you're coming from - I'm also an atheist. I agree with dragonette. I think that your girlfriend needs to respect your beliefs as you respect her's. It doesn't seem like that is happening (proba... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is moving in with me but she hates my ex's cats so has said either they go or she does!
Q. I am going through the final stage of a divorce. When we were together i bought 2 cats for my wife. When we split up and she left she couldn't take them with her and so they have remained with me. I now have a new partner who i have been with f...
A. 21 February 2007: (or I guess I should have said - "at least until she learns to treat your feelings the same as you've treated hers. You're considering giving away you pets for her, for crying out loud! I think you are a very caring and considerate person - just ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is moving in with me but she hates my ex's cats so has said either they go or she does!
Q. I am going through the final stage of a divorce. When we were together i bought 2 cats for my wife. When we split up and she left she couldn't take them with her and so they have remained with me. I now have a new partner who i have been with f...
A. 21 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
I agree 100% with Tellulah. Your girlfriend is being completely unreasonable. She doesn't like your ex, so she wants you to give away your kitties? Because since your ex gave them back to you since she couldn't keep them, they are... (read in full...)
Want to ask my wife's sister out for supper...how do I go about this?
Q. Dear Cupid, My sister in law is currently living with me and my wife, well over 5.5 years. I am 34, the SIL is 45, and the wife is 42. My sister in law is very sweet. Soon, my wife is taking a trip to London the last Tuesday of next month,...
A. 15 February 2007: Hey again Superfly,
Just had another thought. If you're really concerned that your sil isn't with anyone right now, why don't you or your wife invite one of your single guy friends over for dinner. Then maybe your friend and sister in law coul... (read in full...)
Want to ask my wife's sister out for supper...how do I go about this?
Q. Dear Cupid, My sister in law is currently living with me and my wife, well over 5.5 years. I am 34, the SIL is 45, and the wife is 42. My sister in law is very sweet. Soon, my wife is taking a trip to London the last Tuesday of next month,...
A. 15 February 2007: Hello Superfly,
You said, "One of my main concerns to get her out is to kind of question her desires about dating, men, etc., b/c I would like to know why hasn't she, a 45 y/o women hasn't been out on a single date with any guy since she's be... (read in full...)
I got my cousin pregnant - we're both 17 and don't know what to do! Help!
Q. My cousin and i recently were both at a party. After the party she came back to my house to sleepover as both our parents were away for the night. As you can already guess one thing led to another and we ended up sleeping together, the only problem ...
A. 13 February 2007: Holy crap, people. Way to judge jazza and his cousin. Awesome. I congratulate some of you on being such sensitive agony aunts and uncles. Jazza came here to get help, not to be bashed by others and their morals. What isn't accepted by you, ... (read in full...)
Should I lighten up or is he picking on me??
Q. I have been with my b/f for 2 years. I love him but he isnt the best at expressing himself..he will say i love you but i had to tell him i need to hear it more often. He doesnt compliment me..BUT his actions are pretty good. The thing is i dont ...
A. 13 February 2007: Hey Anonymous,
I don't think you're being too sensitive...because your guy is saying it all the time and he knows that it makes you feel angry and bad. I think it's a very good move on your part that you told him that his comments are starting... (read in full...)
Why do I hate the taste of toothpaste? Is their something wrong?
Q. I brush my teeth twice a day, but for the last couple of months it has been weird. Every brand of toothpaste I use starts to taste disgusting. This happens with toothpaste I have used for years. It tastes like I am brushing my teeth with handsoap...
A. 12 February 2007: Hey again Anonymous,
Okay - this is going to sound really stupid, but did you happen to get any soap in your mouth recently? LOL I know when I was a kid, I got lazy and didn't feel like going "all the way upstairs" to get a new tube of toothpas... (read in full...)
Why do I hate the taste of toothpaste? Is their something wrong?
Q. I brush my teeth twice a day, but for the last couple of months it has been weird. Every brand of toothpaste I use starts to taste disgusting. This happens with toothpaste I have used for years. It tastes like I am brushing my teeth with handsoap...
A. 12 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Hvae you changed your diet recently? Maybe it's just your tastebuds changing as you age - people's tastes can change after a certain amount of time so that things they used to really enjoy taste horrible, or vice versa. Same thi... (read in full...)
Our text messaging got him into trouble with his gf! I feel guilty-what should I do?
Q. hi i really need some advice and im hoping someone out there can help me,i work with a guy and he was being really friendly..i thought that he was flirting with me and he gave me his number and i began to start texting him, last night my friend told ...
A. 12 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
This is just a case of a misunderstanding. You told him how you felt and he let you know that it wasn't flirting. He didn't cheat on his wife with you; apparently this is just what sort of person he is - overly friendly. I would ... (read in full...)
My gf and her friend talk like little girls to each other and have shared a bed together!!
Q. I just need too know if this is normal. First off my girlfriend and her friend hardely ever see each other now since they left school and they saw each other for the first time since last october. They generally talk too each other like young little ...
A. 12 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Lol, I don't think you have anything to worry about. ^_^ Sometimes this is just how girls are with one another. Unless you have reason to believe that she would actually get sexual with her friend and cheat on you, then I would ho... (read in full...)
I enjoy reading about murders--is there something wrong with me?
Q. i know this isnt the kind of question normally asked on here and some people may find it disturbing in some way but i really need some advice. the thing is, i love reading/researching/watching things about murders, like i love researching the ...
A. 12 February 2007: Hey,
Nothingis wrong with you. I LOVE reading about murders, too!! Albert Fish is my "favorite" serial killer. I suggest reading a bio or two about him. I even worked as a forensic photographer because I found it to be so interesting. Don't w... (read in full...)
Wanted: Your feedback and ideas for DearCupid... !
Q. Hi I'm looking for your feedback and ideas for DearCupid. Either reply to this thread or send me a private mail :-) Got an idea for a new feature? Want to tell me what works well? What's not up to scratch? If you're in the UK hope you're n...
A. 9 February 2007: I'm bored, so I hope you don't mind if I answer Pam, Andrew.
Pam, if you want to see newest answers to any question there is a link in the top menu (next to "New Questions," there is an answer link, too): http://w... (read in full...)
Wanted: Your feedback and ideas for DearCupid... !
Q. Hi I'm looking for your feedback and ideas for DearCupid. Either reply to this thread or send me a private mail :-) Got an idea for a new feature? Want to tell me what works well? What's not up to scratch? If you're in the UK hope you're n...
A. 9 February 2007: Hey Andrew,
The only thing I would like is that the name of the country pop up on the flag in the area where the poster has asked a question. The only time I can see the country is when I go to the profile page for people. But that's not real... (read in full...)
Should I ask him to be my valentine?
Q. should i ask him to be my valentine? for the past 2 years i've spent valentines day alone then i met the most AMAZING man in the summer and we started a relationship. unfortunatly he broke it off, but we are trying to maintain a friendship. i'm ...
A. 9 February 2007: Hello Anonymous,
If all he wants to be is friends, then by asking him to be your valentine it might push him away from you. I know if I just wanted to be friends with someone who was in love with me, I would not want to spend a romantic holiday ... (read in full...)
Who should I go with?
Q. hi, i just want to ask some question. whom would you prefer to go with in the church, your bestfriend or your boyfriend? ...
A. 9 February 2007: Anon,
Did you try to include yourself in their conversations? If you felt left out, you should talk with your girlfriend. Maybe next time she can try to include you in the conversation if all they did was talk about inside jokes and stuff. ... (read in full...)
Who should I go with?
Q. hi, i just want to ask some question. whom would you prefer to go with in the church, your bestfriend or your boyfriend? ...
A. 9 February 2007: Hi Anon,
Why can't you go with both of them?... (read in full...)
I can't stand anyone else being with my mum
Q. how can i tell my mum i no longer love her and i want to move out? im 13 and hate my mum to bits, people say its impossible to hate ur mum, but i really do, she has really hurt me ((not in a abusive way)) and shes been with this man a year and ...
A. 8 February 2007: Hello Anonymous, I'm very sorry to hear about the loss of your father. I don't think it's true that you don't love your mother. I think you love her very much and you're just feeling like this because you don't want to think of anyone "replaci... (read in full...)
What's the best gift to buy my boyfriend?
Q. HI..I didn't get my boyfriend anything for his b'day which was in December, and I've been trying to decide what to get him for Valentine's, so I was wondering if the 60GB PS3 might be good as a gift, since I didn't get him anything for his b'day ...
A. 8 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
If you're going to get him a PS3 then the 60GB one is the one to get. If you decide you don't want to spend that much money, I suggest buying something else as opposed to downgrading to the 20GB one (you can't upgrade it, etc).
... (read in full...)
Should I just ignore it as a viscious prank?
Q. My Husband got a Valentines Card from someone implying they are sleeping with him. Hi, I just want a little advice really. I have been with my husband for 9 years and we got married 5 months ago. Yesterday he got a Valentines card through the...
A. 8 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Until you have further proof of your husband cheating, I would not let this worry you. It seems like the both of you have a very solid relationship by the way you wrote your post. Some people are just jerks. And you don't want to ... (read in full...)
My husband had an affair...should I stay or go??
Q. I've been married for 22 years and just founded out husband had an affair for 4 years that he broke off 2 years ago. Should I stay in this marriage and move on?...
A. 8 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Should you stay in your marriage? Well, I guess it depends really on if you can trust your husband and also if you can forgive him and feel like you can move on.
Twenty two years of being together is a long time, and obviously he... (read in full...)
Some other guy is with the girl I like. I want to put on a mask and beat him up! What should I do?
Q. Hi i really really really like this girl and she said she liked me but now shes goin out wif this other guy and i actually hate him. i want to beat him up and im on the verge of putting on a mask and absolutly kicking his face in. but i know i s...
A. 2 February 2007: Hi Mullen
Beat him up while wearing a mask?! LOL!! A ski mask (weird) or like a Batman mask? I think you need to just calm down a bit, okay?
I think right now all of these feeling that you have are just so fresh that you aren't quite sur... (read in full...)
I had a terrible cramp and discovered I was covered in blood! I'm not on my period!! Help!!
Q. Ok I'm freaked out about this!! Last Monday morning I was walking from the car to work when I suddenly got this terrible cramp in my stomach, when I got to work I went to the ladies where I discovered that my jeans and under clothes were cov...
A. 2 February 2007: Hi Anonymous,
I agree with David Lewis - you may have had a miscarriage. And like all of the aunts/uncles have suggested, I think you need to be seen by a doctor.
If you did have a miscarriage, then you might need to have your system cleaned o... (read in full...)
Would he always see me as the ugly duckling?
Q. Ok so I used to like this guy in highschool- and unfortuantely the word got out and he found out.. I havent seen him in a few years.. I look entirely different and now have emotional intelligence and experience here in college... But..If I happen to ...
A. 2 February 2007: Hi Anon,
What do you mean by "stalker?" Did you really stalk him - find out his personal information (social security number, house address, phone numbers, medical history, etc), figure out where he lived/worked/hung out, etc? If he really t... (read in full...)
Mum said because "he cant give me anything" I can't marry him! What can I do?
Q. I'm 19 and my bf is 21 we were engaged and parents were OK about it. now,my mum has stopped me from talking to him and has said the wedding is off, he is looking for a job mum said because "he cant give me anything" i can't marry him.i am currently ...
A. 2 February 2007: Hi again Kee,
If your mother and father are really concerned about *you*, then I highly doubt that they would stop talking to you after you moved out. (And if they did stop talking to you, then that only means they have their own issues to resol... (read in full...)
Mum said because "he cant give me anything" I can't marry him! What can I do?
Q. I'm 19 and my bf is 21 we were engaged and parents were OK about it. now,my mum has stopped me from talking to him and has said the wedding is off, he is looking for a job mum said because "he cant give me anything" i can't marry him.i am currently ...
A. 1 February 2007: Hi Kee,
You are 19 - how can either of your parents forbid you to talk with *anyone*? Are you attending university, as well? Or are you just trying to find a job? Is your relationship with your boyfriend good other than your parents saying t... (read in full...)
What do I get a 31 year old man for Valentine's Day?
Q. What kind of things would a 31 year old man like for valentines day?? any help would be appreachiated xxx...
A. 31 January 2007: Hi Anon,
What about something fun - like getting tix for both of you to go to a comedy club.
You could make little "tickets" that he could trade in for a free massage from you, you go to whatever movie he wants to go see, etc.
What abo... (read in full...)
What should I do: Stay with my boyfriend and my crappy job... or join the Army and have a great time?
Q. ive been with my boyfriend for 6 months, and we love each other greatly, his the most imporant thing in my life. when we got together, we thought we'd only be together for a month because i was going to go into the army. but i feel in love with him ...
A. 31 January 2007: (BTW - about my last post -- I'm sorry if I sound pushy, it's just that I am genuinely worried about people who think the army is a great escape from a mundane life. I hope I didn't offend you.)... (read in full...)
What should I do: Stay with my boyfriend and my crappy job... or join the Army and have a great time?
Q. ive been with my boyfriend for 6 months, and we love each other greatly, his the most imporant thing in my life. when we got together, we thought we'd only be together for a month because i was going to go into the army. but i feel in love with him ...
A. 31 January 2007: Hi anon,
I would really, really, REALLY (!!!) reconsider joining the army. I don't know how it works over in the UK, but over in the US they pretty much screw you over every chance they get. I speak from experience and also hearing my family a... (read in full...)
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