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... Send *tina a private message | | | *tina's profile:Hi, I'm Stina! I've been an agony aunt here on Dear Cupid since July 2006 and became a site moderator the following November. I've not been able to be on here as much as I used to be, but that's because I've just started a new job. Hopefully I'll be able to be on here much more in the future. But for now, it's office work for me during the day!
Anyway, I grew up being very independent and because of that have always been able to work out problems in my life pretty well. My friends have often times come to me to help sort out what they should do in tough situations, as well. Hopefully I'll be able to help you out if you ever need advice, too! ^_^
As for who I "really" am - I'm 26, an atheist, and married. I live in beautiful Charm City, Murderland with my husband, our three hairless chinese crested pups (Ivy, Zoey, and Duncan), one smooshy floofhead dwarf hamster (Budgie; RIP Dr. Sushi T_T) and one huffy hedgehog (Nacho). I'm a quality assurance engineer and a graphic designer. My artwork has been shown all over the world including the US, France, Algeria, Australia and more. ^_^
I'm also addicted to cute animals, japanese pop culture, reggaeton, 80's hip hop and breakdancing (can't do it!, love to watch it!), experimental and avant garde films, food and tattoos (self designed).
If anyone cares to see a "real" picture of me, you can see one here: http://sushi-and-pears.livejournal.com/profile (Check out my uber-cool snob nose! haha) I'm posting this in hopes that other aunts/uncles will post their pictures. I'm always interested to see what all of us actually looks like! ^_^
I have a myspace and a livejournal, so if you want to know anymore about me for some reason I'll post the links. (If you'd like to add me as a friend on either of these, please just message me here or on either site! I've made my accounts private to keep out the weirdos.)
Livejournal: http://sushi-and-pears.livejournal.com |
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What should I do: Stay with my boyfriend and my crappy job... or join the Army and have a great time?
Q. ive been with my boyfriend for 6 months, and we love each other greatly, his the most imporant thing in my life. when we got together, we thought we'd only be together for a month because i was going to go into the army. but i feel in love with him ...
A. 31 January 2007: (BTW - about my last post -- I'm sorry if I sound pushy, it's just that I am genuinely worried about people who think the army is a great escape from a mundane life. I hope I didn't offend you.)... (read in full...)
What should I do: Stay with my boyfriend and my crappy job... or join the Army and have a great time?
Q. ive been with my boyfriend for 6 months, and we love each other greatly, his the most imporant thing in my life. when we got together, we thought we'd only be together for a month because i was going to go into the army. but i feel in love with him ...
A. 31 January 2007: Hi anon,
I would really, really, REALLY (!!!) reconsider joining the army. I don't know how it works over in the UK, but over in the US they pretty much screw you over every chance they get. I speak from experience and also hearing my family a... (read in full...)
Is he trying to tell me something?
Q. My boyfriend in the last 3 months has stopped e-mailing me regularly, using the excuse that he's in a remote area with no signal or his e-mail expired---10 days to have it validated,and he doesn't seem to want to answer much of what I ask, what ...
A. 30 January 2007: Hi Zena,
Before jumping to any conclusions, maybe just trust what he says. Where is he and what is he doing there? Does he have a job that requires him to travel to remote areas? I have coworkers who sometimes have trouble keeping in contact ... (read in full...)
How do I know if she's also from the isle of lesbos?
Q. I am married. However I am attracted to women also. My husband knows about this. Of course it "turns" him on. I have a new friend that I just met who is also married. I would like to do something sexual with her but I don't know if she likes women ...
A. 30 January 2007: Okay, maybe it's just me being sensitive or something, but this title is rather offensive - "lesbo" is used as a deragatory term, you know... It's not like the term "queer" which has been embraced by the gay community.
Anyway, hi anonymou... (read in full...)
He wants to take a ski holiday on his own with another female! Should I allow this?
Q. Okay here is my problem my bf is 24 and im 31 he is a teacher. He wants to go on a skiing holiday FOR A WEEK in spring break with a female teacher who is 27 just the two of them to do see if the venue is suitable and it will not cost anything. She ...
A. 29 January 2007: Hey Anon,
I agree with eyes, as well. And I wouldn't worry about not knowing how to ski. Tell your guy that you want him to teach you! It would probably be fun for the both of you - if he didn't have any other ideas in his head. Who wouldn't... (read in full...)
Is the pill free? Is it okay to stop taking it for a while and then start up again?
Q. Do you have to pay for the pill? And is it ok to say, take it for a while, stop for a month and then start taking it again? ...
A. 29 January 2007: Hi Anon,
If you go to a free clinic, the pill can be free (or cost very little).
Like CD said, it has to be taken continuously to work. Even missing one day could mean a greater risk of pregnancy.
I suggest trying to find a free clinic in... (read in full...)
My bf smells-it is not normal "BO"body odor and it's horrible. What is it and how can I tell him?
Q. My bfriend smells- it is not body odor. He showers everyday and the smell is not normal BO- I can't place my finger on it but it is horrible. He does not wear cologne or any bodyspray so it is not that. Even after he showers I still smell it- it ...
A. 29 January 2007: Hi Sky,
It might be his diet. I know that many times once people start eating healthier or have a substantial intake of water, smells seem to clear out of the system. I actually know of one person who tried everything to smell better, that her... (read in full...)
Update on the neck cyst! Doctors were not helpful and told me it was just a fatness of some sort. Antyadvice?
Q. this is an up-date to the cyst problem. i have found out its not a cyst, the doctor said its something to do with muscles, but i dnt know what he means as it does not look like muscles, but some sort of fatness on my one side of the neck. th...
A. 29 January 2007: Perhaps you should consider visiting a plastic/cosmetic surgeon since all it is is something cosmetic that you'd like to have changed. Try asking your doctor if he/she knows of a good one or else try doing a search online and see if there are any ... (read in full...)
How do I get him to quit thinking of me just his little sis's best friend?
Q. So I have this friend, we'll call her Jackie. She has an older brother who's best friend I have a bit of a crush on. We'll call him Greg. Well I don't know Greg that well, and I'd like to get to know him more without seeming like I'm interested ...
A. 29 January 2007: Hi Anonymous,
Well the only way that you're going to get past this guy thinking you're another one of the annoying friends is by letting him get to know you. Have you told your friend about your crush? Maybe you all can go out to a movie to... (read in full...)
Is there any way to get rid of neck cysts?
Q. dear cupid i would like to know is their any other way to get rid of a cyst in one part of the neck to even out both necks. i am self concious and do not know how the cyst happened, but when i ask my family they say their is nothing there. e...
A. 29 January 2007: Hi Anon,
Like Willy said, you need to make an appointment with your doctor. Only he/she will be able to tell you what needs and can be done for your specific problem.
Take care.... (read in full...)
I'm embarrassed by my gf's crass comments to other people. How do I deal with this?
Q. My girlfriend is quite eccentric and very over the top and I cringe so much when she speaks now. Before I could cope with it but now I cringe too much when she speaks. For example when she speaks with her friends she calls them stuff like 'Whor...
A. 29 January 2007: Hey Anon,
Well, I don't really see a problem with it if her friends are okay with her doing this. I think it would be a problem if she was just saying this sort of thing to random people while walking down the street. lol
It looks like you j... (read in full...)
When is it okay to give a guy, a call?
Q. When is it okay to call a guy?...
A. 29 January 2007: Hi Anon,
I think that depends on the guy. I think most times any guy would be flattered that you call him. But there are those who are old fashioned and like to call girls first (I don't think there are very many of them like this, though).... (read in full...)
Is this guy just playing games??
Q. I am talking to this guy that i think is perfect but my family and friends think otherwise.Yesterday i was invited to the movies by my best friend so i decided to invite the guy that am talking to so that way we could finally meet. He said that he ...
A. 29 January 2007: Hi HappyBunny,
Is this the only time that he's stood you up? Because honestly he really may have been turned off by the fact that so many people were going. What kind of guy is he? Maybe he just doesn't like going places with crowds of people. ... (read in full...)
Should I let my fiancee invite all his ex gf's to our wedding?
Q. Ok, so I am getting married in a few months and I obviously don't want to invite any of my ex-boyfriends because I think it would make my fiance feel uncomfortable. He on the other hand wants to invite almost all his ex-girlfriends. He claims they ...
A. 29 January 2007: Well, I think India had a great answer!
Just remember that it's a big day for the BOTH of you. If he wants to invite some of this friends, then I think that's fine. A bit strange (if he doesn't really talk to them that much; but then again I'... (read in full...)
I'm 18 and pregnant. Worried I may miscarriage again..how can I prevent that from happening?
Q. I am an 18 year old female who just found out today that i am pregnant.5 months ago i had a miscarriage and I am very frightened it might happen again.Do u have any advice for me far as how to prevent the miscarriage? I know miscarriages happen, but ...
A. 29 January 2007: Hi there anon,
Tell your ob/gyn immediatly as he/she could put you on pills that help to prevent miscarriages.
And in addition to this, stop doing any drugs (over the counter, etc), drinking alcoholic beverages, and smoking.
I also sugge... (read in full...)
Will being on birth control give you a 'false' pregnancy reading?
Q. Will being on birth control give you a 'false' pregnancy reading? I was just wondering, (uh, yea, lol) if when you are on birth control pills and you take a pregnancy test, will the reading be positive because of the hormones? What about if yo...
A. 26 January 2007: Hi there anon,
No - being on the pill *should not* result in getting a false pregnancy test. The hormone HCG is only apparent in the female body when she has become pregnant. (The only time I've heard of someone having a false pregnancy reading ... (read in full...)
How can I leave my abusive bf w/out sparking his temper and threats?
Q. My boyfriend of 16 months has a very bad temper. He never HITS me but does shove and pull me around sometimes. Whenever I want to leave him he cries and begs and threatens suicide. I don't want to risk him really doing it so i stay. I really do love ...
A. 25 January 2007: Hi Anon,
If you two live together, then I suggest moving out when he is out - possibly at work or has just left to go out with some friends. Make sure that you have some friends with you so you can pack up your things and get out of there fa... (read in full...)
Girls! What foundation could I use to cover up my pimples? It's so embarrassing!
Q. i get big spots around my chin and find them really embarasing. When i try to cover them up with foundation as it just seems to look worse, does anyone know any amazing makeup that would look like i have no spots at all or anything that would get ...
A. 25 January 2007: Oh, I forgot to mention - make sure that the make-up you are using either says "noncomedogenic" or "will not clog pores" on the bottle. If it doesn't, then something in the make-up might be causing you to break out. And make sure you drink a good ... (read in full...)
Girls! What foundation could I use to cover up my pimples? It's so embarrassing!
Q. i get big spots around my chin and find them really embarasing. When i try to cover them up with foundation as it just seems to look worse, does anyone know any amazing makeup that would look like i have no spots at all or anything that would get ...
A. 25 January 2007: Hi there,
There have been other questions like the one you've posted, so you might want to take a minute and see what the other responses have been. Here's one link, but if you use the search bar, you can find more:
http://www.de... (read in full...)
What can I do to get rid of the acne scarring left behind on my face?
Q. I have acne scarring and want to do something about it. It's not bumpy or anything, they're just red marks where serious spots were on my cheeks. Does anyone know of any treatments that work for this kind of scar? Thanks...
A. 24 January 2007: Hi Anon,
I suggest talking to your doctor about a medicated lotion called "Sulfacet-R." My m-i-l used it and it got rid of all of her scarring (it also keeps break outs from happening). Here's a link with some information:
http://www.dr... (read in full...)
Has anyone ever had an out of body experience?
Q. i know this has nothing to do with love..but Has anyone had an out of the body expierenced??...
A. 24 January 2007: Hi Nena,
I have night terrors, which you might have, too. It's not an "out of body experience," but it might seem like it is. What happens during night terrors with me:
- I am sleeping
- I can still open my eyes and look around the room
- I... (read in full...)
My mom and I are taking care of my depressed bf. I'm sick of his baggage and want to move. What should I do??
Q. Sorry this is soo long.....But you need the details. I met my boyfriend online in August of 2005. He moved from Baton Rouge, Louisiana to live with me in Maryland in March 2006. (He was living with his mom and hated it.) He has a degree in cri...
A. 24 January 2007: Hi again Yogi,
I'm glad that you were able to find my advice helpful. :)
That's very good news about your guy possibly becoming a police officer in NC. After he is settled into that position for a while, he might change his attitude and be ... (read in full...)
I used fake pics on myspace and met a guy. He knows the truth, but loves me for my personality. But now, he wants nothing to do with me.
Q. I recently met a fantastic man over the net (myspace) but i made the stupid mistake of using someone elses pics as im a little insecure on how i look! we chatted over the phone for 4 months and hes just found out about me lying over the ...
A. 24 January 2007: Hi Anon,
I really think you should stick to what you say when you tell him you will not contact him again. I'm not sure why he's responding to you after you say that - maybe it's guilt, maybe he still *wants* to care about you, maybe he *does* c... (read in full...)
I think my friend has mental problems!
Q. Dear Everyone, i have a friend who is going to get engaged but i dont think he is mentally stable to do that. first of all he says he is agnostic then he says he is spirtual but not religous. i dont know does he really know what he is sayin...
A. 23 January 2007: Hi Anon, It is possible that someone can be agnostic and spiritual, but not religious. Of course, there are other definitions of these words, but basically this is what they all mean -- Agnostic: the belief that there can be no proo... (read in full...)
My mom and I are taking care of my depressed bf. I'm sick of his baggage and want to move. What should I do??
Q. Sorry this is soo long.....But you need the details. I met my boyfriend online in August of 2005. He moved from Baton Rouge, Louisiana to live with me in Maryland in March 2006. (He was living with his mom and hated it.) He has a degree in cri...
A. 22 January 2007: Hi there Yogi,
If there are no positions open in the specific field he is looking for, then maybe you could suggest he find out about open positions at police departments. This might get his foot in the door - networking and such. He could fi... (read in full...)
How can I stop biting my lips, fingers and insides of my cheeks?
Q. I have a really big problem with biting my lips, the skin around my fingers, the inside of my cheek. I am usually making it bleed or hurt really bad. Does anyone have any idea why I do this all the time, even without noticing? And how can I stop? ...
A. 22 January 2007: Hi Anon,
I used to have a bad problem biting my thumbs, so I know how irritating and embarassing your problem can be!
What I did for my problem was put band-aids on my thumbs w/ like neosporin or bacetracin on them. First of all, if you have... (read in full...)
My bf cussed out the guy I have a crush on! What should I do?
Q. I have a problem with my boy-friend being to overprotective. He just cussed out the guy i have a crush on, in front of me!!..and he knows that i don't like that, but what can i do because now he's asking me to set the up to fight..and the only thing ...
A. 20 January 2007: Am I missing something? I don't see anywhere where it says she actually told her boyfriend that she has a crush on this other guy. From what I read, it just looks like this guy has a problem with the guy she's crushing on, but not necessarily b/c ... (read in full...)
My bf cussed out the guy I have a crush on! What should I do?
Q. I have a problem with my boy-friend being to overprotective. He just cussed out the guy i have a crush on, in front of me!!..and he knows that i don't like that, but what can i do because now he's asking me to set the up to fight..and the only thing ...
A. 19 January 2007: Hi Useless,
What should you do?
1. Dump your boyfriend - he has major issues; he's threatening you and this other guy with violence; you have a cruch on someone else already
2. Tell someone what he plans on doing - first thing I would ment... (read in full...)
How comes no one has replied to my question? What's goin on?
Q. Hi. Last week I posted few questions on the website’s other option of “just post my question without registering”. By now I still have not receive any reply. Again here are my questions. Whether registered or not and when posting questions, can ...
A. 18 January 2007: Hi there,
I remember reading your question, and actually there were responses:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/questions-about-dearcupid.html
I'm not sure why you didn't see them, as they were posted the same day. Did you check the site, ... (read in full...)
2 month's rent!? How can anyone's love be so cheap?
Q. It is possible for someone real feelings and love to change for money? My girlfriends who we have been together for 2 years and recently separated, telling me if you want to prove your love to me please pay for past two months rent (which I haven’t ...
A. 18 January 2007: Hi Anon,
The first thing that came to mind was wondering whether or not she's struggling to make ends meet. If this is the case, and you have the extra money to spare so she could get back on her feet, I can sort of understand where she's co... (read in full...)
He's asking me to chip in when I get a full time job... feel slightly put-out by this, but should I?
Q. I have been with my b/f for almost 2 years. He has paid for mostly everything. I pay for things here and there but its mostly him who pays if we go to a movie or to dinner or to a bar or for take out. I work part time b/c i am a full time student. ...
A. 17 January 2007: Hi Anonymous, I don't even know where to start with this - I agree with everyone else. Why should he be expected to still almost always foot the bill? My husband and I (even when we were dating) always split things evenly. For example - one ni... (read in full...)
I find my husband-to-be an irritating little nerd... give me a wake-up call
Q. I find my bloke an irritating little nerd! Honestly, we are getting married in 8 weeks time and he gets on my nerves. He picks at my son (aged 15). States all the jobs he is 'going to do' and nothing gets done. He works shifts and sometimes we don't ...
A. 17 January 2007: Hi Anon,
You really shouldn't go into a marriage with all sorts of problems. These aren't the typical sort of everyday relationship problems, either. How dare *he* pick at *your* son?? The nerve! He could at least talk to you about whatever... (read in full...)
Would my man be embarrassed to receive roses at work?
Q. I want to send the man I love a bunch of roses, just cos im a bit of a soppy romantic and want to suprise him. However he is at work all day and so if I sent them to his home he wouldnt get them. Do you think it would be too embarrassing for him to ...
A. 17 January 2007: Hi there,
I agree with Eyes. I don't think you should do it. While it's a romantic gesture, I'm sure he'd never hear the end of it from his friends.
What about having something else delivered to his place of work? Eyes mentioned going ... (read in full...)
Was I wrong to confide my relationship problems in a friend? My bf thinks so!
Q. My bf and I are having problems in our relationship. I have tried talking to him about it but he doesn't want to discuss it. A girlfriend called me and asked why I was so down so I told her. My bf found out that I had told her about us, and was very ...
A. 16 January 2007: Hi there,
Well I always think it's best to talk to my partner about things without involving anyone else - 1) because I don't want whoever it is to get a bad impression of my guy and 2) because I would feel strange knowing one of my guy's friends ... (read in full...)
My bf gave me a black eye! He says he'll change. I don't know what to do.
Q. Hello,im 21 and i have been in a relationship with an amazing guy for 4 months. We planned to get engaged this year and i really know i love this man. But just over a week ago we had a row, to which he hit me in the face and i still have (a week ...
A. 16 January 2007: Hello Racy,
I think it's time that you leave the relationship. There are way too many problems after dating him for only 4 months. Is staying with someone who beats his girlfriend worth it? What's the say he wouldn't do it again? He "claims"... (read in full...)
My best friend said he's in love with me and it's a dream come true! He hasn't made much contact recently - what should I do?
Q. my best friend (male) admitted to haven falling in love with me and it's a dream come true! The thing is before when we were just friends i would always be the one keeping us in touch but now things have changed and i want to play hard to get. It ...
A. 15 January 2007: Anonymous,
If you're playing hard to get after he told you his feelings, then maybe he thinks you're weirded out! I suggest you don't play games with someone who obviously has such deep feelings for you. If you care about him, call him up and m... (read in full...)
My ex is taking the split with his new girl harder than he took the split with me... why?
Q. My boyfriend and I broke up about a year ago. I was hurt at how quickly he met someone else and moved in with her. I have a good job and am responsible...I think he was bored with me. His next girlfriend was more compatible with him..willing to go ...
A. 15 January 2007: Hi Anon,
Well, maybe it was thrilling for him to be with someone "wild." Maybe she had knocked down his self confidence so losing her has hit him harder than with someone who left him with some dignity. I don't know - there are numerous reasons ... (read in full...)
What forms of contraception (other than condoms) are good for a migraine sufferer?
Q. Hey everyone Was wondering if anyone has any advice about contraception as my bf and i wanna stop using condoms (we have been together a long time) but i suffer with migrains so it limits what i can use Have looked on the net but due to the...
A. 15 January 2007: Hi there Anon,
What works for some might not work for you. Just as the nuvaring was good for the anonymous poster below, I found that in the first few months of using it, I had more headaches/migraines than I typically do (I, too, suffer from mig... (read in full...)
I have this urge to send my ex bf a nasty e-mail! Why do I want to hurt him?
Q. Hi All, Recently, I just got out of a relationship, but I seem to think of my ex 24/7. The problem is that I do not have any loving thoughts of my ex. The breakup was disasterous, as the both of us threw insults at each other and he asked me not ...
A. 15 January 2007: Hi Serene,
If I were you, I would not send him any kind of nasty email. Any sort of nasty email, letter, etc where it's written out can come back to haunt you. You don't want to potentially make problems for yourself in the future, right? ... (read in full...)
My ex emailed me to ask if I'm "better about things with us now." What should I say?
Q. Okay, please please help. Boyfrend has recently dumped me, I begged him to change his mind but he wouldnt. Cried loads and everything but he said it wasnt right, he was almost convinced that we dont have a long term future together. He then said we ...
A. 15 January 2007: Hi there anon,
If I were in your position, I would just tell him not to worry about it. While he might still care about you because you're his ex, it's not really any of his business how you're doing at this point.
If you were doing great and ... (read in full...)
He feels guilty for using me, but I said don't worry. Now he hardly talks to me!
Q. Why is he being funny with me? I met him last week,and he seemed really keen. He is 29 and im 18 but im fine with this and so is he.. but on saturday i ended up at his house and i gave him oral i felt a bit guilty because i told him i was gonna make ...
A. 15 January 2007: Hi there Kez,
Since you've only known this guy a week, are you sure that what he told you is true? Do you really think he feels bad that he "used" you? I'm wondering if he's okay about what's happened and is saying this to get rid of you beca... (read in full...)
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