The Guy Who Likes Me Abused His Ex Girlfriend, how didn't I spot it?
Q. I'm in complete shock rn, I went through a breakup recently and there's another guy who likes me a lot (he's told me). He's good looking, a few years older, has a reputation for being a player and a few of my other friends know him. He comes off as ...
A. 7 April 2021: Yes these are huge red flags OP, and your totally right to steer well clear.
Its good that you have friends that have told you this information, other wise you might have unsuspectingly entered into a relationship with him and gone through ... (read in full...)
After one date he starts asking about sexy pictures. I like him but the vibe has changed
Q. Happy Easter fellow agony aunts! So, I am in need of some advice of this guy that I have been speaking/ seeing... so here we go! I have been speaking to this guy for pushing on 4 weeks now, we met on “tinder” and if I’m being honest, at first...
A. 6 April 2021: I think that you know in your heart of hearts what this guy is, as all the other Aunts have told you, he is a player.
He made you feel comfortable on that first date being kind pleasant and nice, but this was just to lure you in.
If i honestly... (read in full...)
MY boyfriend's new job leaves no time for us. I'm worried our relationship won't last
Q. Recently my boyfriend got a new job driving lorries and it seems like hes constantly working and i never see him anymore. He works mon to fri has to be up at 4am then works til 5pm but often til 9pm. Weekends hes on call midnight saturda...
A. 6 April 2021: What would you prefer, him working hard earning decent money, or no job at all sitting on the sofa all day playing video games.
He has only just started the job, so obviously trying to make a good impression. These hours won't last forever,... (read in full...)
I want to move on but I know it will forever change the relationship between my ex and I
Q. Hello, I realise that people will think these concerns are crazy, but here I go... I’ve been separated for 2.5 years, I’ve had 2 dates within that time and I really had to build myself up to go on them. Both were fine dates but I always find an ...
A. 5 April 2021: I think that if you want to move on and get to know someone else then you have to got to stop worrying what your ex thinks.
Did he think about your feelings when he got with someone else?, someone he has been with for nearly two years. No, you ... (read in full...)
Is it asking too much for my girlfriend to notice when I make changes in myself?
Q. Am I asking for too much for my gf to notice my hair. I have not been looking after myself, as depressed and lockdown. I went and got major makeover and she has not mentioned it even once. I am so tempted to take pics and send to others and I will ...
A. 5 April 2021: As you say in the end of your post you barely talk, so maybe you have indeed missed the signs.
You know your relationship better than we do here at DC, but i would say a couple that have stopped complimenting each other, and have also stopped ... (read in full...)
What to do in regards to an ex friend and her repeatedly calling my land line phone?
Q. Hi and thank you to everyone who takes the time to respond to my question. A couple of months back I posted on here about a so called " friend' with whom I had a falling out. She sent me a text that she had contacted the school board that I am ...
A. 5 April 2021: She sounds like she has got a problem, and i don't think you should go down the line of tit for tat as tempting as it may be. I think if you do it will be like trying to extinguish a fire using paraffin.
I think your best option would be too get ... (read in full...)
How do we get in touch with women in 2021
Q. Hello all :-) Asking you guys again since you were so helpful to me last time I needed advice and someone to talk to. (See: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/do-i-leave-a-10-year-relationship-or.html) Basically, I'm trying to return to the ...
A. 5 April 2021: Not sure of what country you are in, but getting out and meeting someone in the conventional way has been rather difficult for the best part of a year now due to COVID restrictions and implementations impeding us from getting out.
For this rea... (read in full...)
My married boyfriend says he wants his future to be with me but he is buying another house with his wife
Q. My married boyfriend is vowing that he no longer wants to stay married to his wife. She does not know this though. He tells me he is working on their marriage for her benefit and to appease her, although it is not what he wants. He is going through ...
A. 5 April 2021: OP this is a classic case of you being the mistress, seeing a married guy who say's he will leave his wife but never will.
I think you words you need to drum into yourself here are HE NEVER WILL leave his wife for you.
We see these situations... (read in full...)
Girlfriend hiding messages
Q. Hey! So my girlfriend have been hiding texts from me. She doesnt mind responding to peoples snaps when Im sitting next to her, but with this one guy, she is waiting until I stand to go do something. I confronted her and she said that she hadnt sp...
A. 5 April 2021: Trust in one of the most important contributing factors that bind a relationship together. If there is no trust in a relationship than in all honesty it does not stand a chance.
The fact that you are on here asking the question is a strong c... (read in full...)
I fear my husband will cheat on my while overseas
Q. My husband of 10 years is currently residing in Spain because of his work. His tenure is 4 months and he is returning in May. I have been suffering extreme anxiety worrying if he is having his sexual needs met there without me. 4 months is a long t...
A. 29 March 2021: I think that when he cheated on you early on in the marriage, you say you worked through it, which he was probably very happy about because most people would have given him his marching orders. The working through it was of a benefit to him, but I ... (read in full...)
I want to become a nurse but my husband isn't supportive
Q. I think my relationship is dying but I don’t know how to save it. My partner and I have been having relationship issues for almost 18 months and it’s not helping my mental health as I have PND (being in a pandemic with several lockdowns also h...
A. 29 March 2021: It sounds like from what you say that this relationship has run its course, and has been like this for some time.
I'm not going to delve in to who is right and who is wrong, but I think you need to be accepting of the fact that it's over and does... (read in full...)
My girlfriend refuses to get treatment for mental illness and her behaviour and attitude is really getting to me
Q. Hi and thanks My gf and I have been together over a year. She is very moody which is getting to me. She will be sweet and loving, then aloof and rude. She does suffer from mental illness and chooses not to be treated. I try ot encourage...
A. 29 March 2021: You have advised her to seek help, and she is choosing not to.
You can offer support, you can offer advice, but at the end of the day the only person that help her get over that first step is her.
Now her unwillingness to seek help is now... (read in full...)
My husband wants a professional sexologist watch us have sex s that she could give us pointers on how to improve our sex life!
Q. My husband wants to bring a third party into our relationship, but no, this isn't what you think. It's not about a threesome; he wants to bring a professional sexologist to watch us having sex and give pointers on how to improve our sex life, he...
A. 29 March 2021: I can't actually say I have ever heard of anything like this before so this is a new one for me.
I think that a couples sex life is something that you work on together as a couple, experimenting, trying new positions, exploring each other li... (read in full...)
My partner has a problem with me keeping a single, small picture of my late husband in my apartment
Q. Dear cupid and everyone, i just wanna ask something. Is it really that bad to honor your late husband with just one Single little picture of him in your own apartment just for a respect? Beside you and your new Partner are not living in your a...
A. 29 March 2021: I don't think there is anything wring with this, and he needs to get over this and stop being so narrow minded.
The small picture of your late husband is in an apartment that neither of you even reside at, but you only go there a couple of times... (read in full...)
Why does my husband look at other women?
Q. when I was on holiday with my husband last year I noticed him looking over at a table where two couples were sitting having a meal. it was our last night on holiday and he said he was looking at the food one of the women were having as she was ...
A. 28 March 2021: Its not ideal, and it is wrong the way he is looking at women, especially in front of you.
I think communication is key here, you need to sit down and have a chat and tell him how uncomfortable it makes you feel the way he looks at other woman.
... (read in full...)
How often does the average married couple have sex?
Q. This is a pretty simple question I guess. How often does the average married couple have sex? ...
A. 26 March 2021: Its a pretty impossible question to answer, there are many factors to consider to get even close to obtaining an answer, such as age, health, feelings towards one another, chemistry etc.
A young couple been married five minutes might be at it li... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant with my stepbrother's baby. How do we tell our parents?
Q. Dear cupid, I am in desperate need of some advice. My boyfriend and I are pregnant. Now here's the problem. My boyfriend is my step brother. Even worse we live directly above our parents. Its a separate apartment. Now we've had feelings...
A. 26 March 2021: You are both of an age now where you are not youngsters anymore, and your parents are more advanced in years also.
I think honesty is the best policy, and the best thing that you can do is tell them you are pregnant, and I would do this sooner r... (read in full...)
Will men in general settle for having average, lacklustre or even bad sex over NO sex at all?
Q. I know this is a generalization. But would you say it is reasonable to assume that many or most or at least some men would take average, mediocre or even bad sex over having no sex at all? For example, if they are on a business trip or away from ...
A. 25 March 2021: Your asking would a guy in a committed relationship, if they were away on a business trip, away from their wives, girlfriends, would they have a fling with someone else just to get any sex at all?.
You could come up with all sorts of relation... (read in full...)
I'm hopelessly in love with my teacher
Q. I have a slight problem...I really like my teacher! I know there are lots of these questions about but I really need an answer! Well ever since I've known him I've had feelings for him. It started off just a small crush but over the past three y...
A. 25 March 2021: I think its good that you are mature enough to understand that nothing will ever happen between the two of you, and that you don't want to risk him losing his job or his family.
If you told him these are the sorts of scenarios that could possibly... (read in full...)
Girlfriend texting guy she never mentioned before
Q. Hey there. So my girlfriend and I have been together for 8 months now, and I need some advise. She is texting some guy on a regular basis (I see the snaps coming in on her phone when we're together sometimes), and that in it self doesn't bother m...
A. 25 March 2021: This was not just the odd text, but frequent texting on a regular basis.
I think for me the fact that she is texting an old FWB she was seeing before she met you is a huge red flag.
She never divulged this information until asked, and then ... (read in full...)
I'm unsure what to do about a female stalking me. The cops won't do anything!
Q. I'm a delivery driver, and been doing the job for 14 years now, got it at the end of the last recession, but it's a stable job. I've got a problem which is causing me a lot of stress; a female nurse is stalking me, and the cops won't do a thing...
A. 23 March 2021: Well technically she has not done anything wrong apart from flirting with you in the car park, and sending you some nice gifts.
Sure there are lot of guys who would not mind being in your position, a nurse, still in her scrubs flirting with you... (read in full...)
Casual Nudity with Mother In Law
Q. This past summer, my wife, kids, and I went on vacation with my in-laws. We shared a lovely condo on the beach. Since we were at the beach, I went shirtless most of the time and typically just wore my swim shorts or athletic shorts with no underwear ...
A. 23 March 2021: I think if i was at that condo and i was going to get a drink of water knowing that a female family member was still up, it would just be an instant reaction to put on a robe, or a pair of pants or boxer shorts at the very least.
I think you enjo... (read in full...)
My uncle stepped in after my father passed away. Would it be appropriate to ask him to walk me down the aisle when I marry?
Q. When I was 10 years old, my father passed away. My uncle (my dad's brother) stepped up to the plate and helped my mom, my brother and I out. My uncle was single with no kids of his own and he always spent time with my brother and I, even before my ...
A. 23 March 2021: I think that is a lovely thing to do, and totally appropriate.
I bet you uncle would be absolutely made up that he will be walking you down the aisle.
So go ahead and ask him, and good luck. ... (read in full...)
Did the tarot reader tap into a spirit?
Q. Hi all, a bit of a strange question but I have my own tarot cards and split with my boyfriend a few weeks ago, I've taken to asking the cards the present and future and I keep picking negative cards. So I asked a friend what she thought of Tarot...
A. 23 March 2021: I think you are going to have to take this with a pinch of salt.
I'm sure that there some genuine mediums out there that do indeed communicate with the spirit world. Unfortunately lurking amongst all the genuine one's are a lot of fakes that cla... (read in full...)
Girlfriend texting guy she never mentioned before
Q. Hey there. So my girlfriend and I have been together for 8 months now, and I need some advise. She is texting some guy on a regular basis (I see the snaps coming in on her phone when we're together sometimes), and that in it self doesn't bother m...
A. 23 March 2021: You have not asked her, so it could very well be one of her other guy friends, in which case is all good.
Communication is key here, just ask her who that is she keeps texting and see what her response is, thats all you can do really. ... (read in full...)
I'm not sure whether to end this relationship or keep dating or what!
Q. For over a year, I have been "dating" a woman who I met at a folk dancing club, the only time I have met anyone in open play, although that was the goal of attending Her life has been a ripping yarn, indeed she has written 3 unpublished nove...
A. 22 March 2021: Wow op, you really do know a lot about her life. Is this what she has divulged to you since you have known her. Or has she just done an unpublished autobiography that you have just finished reading.
I don't know her, but I would not necessar... (read in full...)
Should I just bite the bullet and invite an old friend out for coffee and see how it goes?
Q. Hi, I'm in my mid forties and have had a crush on a childhood boy/ man now, for years. We've never had a full conversation before besides saying "hi". From what I've observed, he seemed to be the quiet type when it comes to girls/ ladies. Our ...
A. 21 March 2021: She probably never knew that you had a crush on her son, neither was she playing match maker. You are a close friend of the family as she was more than likely just being polite.
I would not really read to much into him friend requesting you on f... (read in full...)
My fiance and I are considering become a throuple with her ex girlfriend
Q. I've been with my fiancee Becky for 8 years, we got engaged in 2018 and are getting married in 2022; it was planned for 2020 but got cancelled, first due to our work schedules from January to March, and now the coronavirus pandemic. I'm 38, my wif...
A. 20 March 2021: Its never a good idea bringing a third person in to the bedroom, and more often than not end with the end of a marriage/relationship.
Have a scroll through previous threesome posts and try to find one that had a happy ending.
I think that this ... (read in full...)
I was brave and told a co-worker how I felt but he's sort of left me hanging
Q. I have recently bravely declared my feelings to a colleague *R whom has recently left the supermarket Morrisons company a week ago to train for a new working from home job. Me and R shared banter and bonded well. I told him one to one privatel...
A. 20 March 2021: I feel the relationship between the pair of you was just banter and bonding, and he saw it as nothing more.
He has left the company that you both worked for, this would have been his opportunity to take things up with you and declare his feelings... (read in full...)
My ex lover wants me to send back the vibrator he gave me as a present
Q. This is a pretty bizarre and embarrassing question, but I need someone to tell me what I should do. I dated a guy for just over a couple of months, and it was pretty intense fairly fast (this was when the pubs and bars were still open). He got me...
A. 18 March 2021: This is a very weird request, not sure what his motives are. Can't be of a financial nature of he would have wanted other items back.
As you say this is a personal item, and he is being really creepy.
I would not send it back to him, neither ... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my ex and my fiance being in a relationship
Q. I've become concerned about my fiance Simon; he's been spending a lot of time with my ex-boyfriend John, and now rumours in the neighbourhood are that they're in a sexual relationship together. I broke up with John in 2013 and got with Steve in Ma...
A. 18 March 2021: I think this has all got a bit close to home and needs to be sorted out sooner rather than later.
Did John ever show any signs of being gay in the time you was with him?.
So Simon and John and obviously been seen innocently out together. How ha... (read in full...)
I am declining to go to a wedding. What is an appropriate response if asked why I can't attend
Q. I have a "friend" that I known my whole life because our dads work for the same company. We went to the same high school and hung out often. As an adult, I can't stand him. He always wants to go places but wants other people to pick up his tab....
A. 17 March 2021: He is a friend that has been in your life, and now isen't, like you say you no longer do anything with him.
He is obviously not a friend you want in your life, so it stands to reason you would not want to attend the wedding.
Just send the... (read in full...)
My ex boyfriend said that he does not know what will become of us. What does this mean?
Q. Hi everyone. I am in need of some advice on how to move forward in my situation. I have been with my partner for 9 years. We split up two months ago because over the past year we have been in lockdown together (both working from home) and over t...
A. 15 March 2021: I agree with Code warrior, i think you need to chill out about this whole thing.
Your hanging off of his every word, and clinging onto the fact that you are going to get back together and all with will be rosy and good again.
Yes a lot of ... (read in full...)
Why would my new boyfriend still be talking to his old girlfriend?
Q. Hey y'all. My boyfriend of 6 weeks and I have run into some interference from his ex girlfriend of 8 years. He moved to my country and we started dating after he broke up with her. She was not in touch with him at all during those 6 weeks and then ...
A. 15 March 2021: While i don't condone snooping through someones phone while they are otherwise engaged, in this particular case it has revealed some very worrying facts regarding his commitment and feelings towards you.
You ask what is going on here?. He is on th... (read in full...)
My wife suddenly wants an open marriage and wants me to date her friend but she doesn't want anyone else
Q. My wife Katherine wants us to have an open marriage and her reasoning for it is "most guys want another woman on the side and you'll probably have one anyway; I don't want another man on the side at all, you're the only man for me." She wants me t...
A. 15 March 2021: I think that she has carried her insecurities of being cheated on in the last relationship, and is thinking that your going to do the same.
Although you may have no intentions of being unfaithful to her, in her mind she actually believes you will... (read in full...)
Should I tell his wife? I found out I was dating a married man
Q. I dated this guy who has a 13-year-old daughter for the past 18 months, he told me he was separated, thought nothing of it; his daughter likes me. Then I later find out a week ago he's still legally married to his wife; his wife's a nurse and she ...
A. 15 March 2021: I don't think you should tell the wife, what good will do to turn her life upside down.
I know its hard, its never easy to go through something like this. I feel all you can do is walk away with your head up high, and think things could have bee... (read in full...)
Boyfriend and I fought and haven't spoken in a week. His bday is coming what should I do?
Q. I quarreled with my boyfriend a week ago He asked me to call him late at night, but I couldn't because my sister was asleep So he was upset and made it a reason not to speak to me for so long.His birthday these days I don't know what to do, w...
A. 15 March 2021: I don't know how serious the argument was, but it sounds like the relationship has come to an end.
Maybe you could have made the phone call away from where your sister was sleeping, or gone outside.
You chose not to make the call, and now I ... (read in full...)
I'm 44 he's 25. He wants to meet in real life. Thoughts??
Q. I'm 44 and he's 25.....we met on fb this past summer after he sent me a request:) My initial impression of him was that he was a good looking guy but a bit insecure and perhaps a bit full of himself( bc of al the selfies and muscle pics on h...
A. 13 March 2021: Way to much drama, i'm sure you don't really need all of this going on at your time of life.
Block him, and the mother and move on with your life. ... (read in full...)
S it wrong that I sometimes get jealous, bitter and resentful towards teen couples and early 20s couples, couples in their 20s? because I was single for most of those years
Q. I was single for all of my teens and most of my 20s, i didn't really start dating until i was 29, i lost my virginity at 25, it was a fling, casual sex, so no emotional connection, but my sex life has been non-existant for most of my life, just a ...
A. 11 March 2021: I'm sure you sent a post almost identical to this one a while back, and you received some good advice. Apologies if this was not you.
I think as with anything in life it's important to look forward and not back.
You could put a positive spin ... (read in full...)
My husband has been receiving weird things in the mail. We don't know why or what to do about it
Q. I've had to change names in this for anonymity reasons. My husband is worried about opening the mail after receiving mail addressed to him that he didn't order; not one, but three. He received a package last Monday; he was expecting it...
A. 10 March 2021: It does not sound like a scam to me, scammer's normally want to extract personal information from you in order to take money from you.
Its rather strange to me that he has received some quite extravagant gifts, being sports gear, and a substant... (read in full...)
MMF With wife to explore Bi side
Q. Married for 8 years with 2 kids. Wife comes from a conservative background and did not have much sexual experience when we met. Neither did I but I had more than her. We have both grown sexually together and have what I would define as a good sex ...
A. 10 March 2021: We get a lot of people writing posts on DC regarding wanting to live out the fantasy of bringing a third party into the bedroom, and some have already indulged in it.
The results are always the same, which is the people in question have run into... (read in full...)
I'm 44 he's 25. He wants to meet in real life. Thoughts??
Q. I'm 44 and he's 25.....we met on fb this past summer after he sent me a request:) My initial impression of him was that he was a good looking guy but a bit insecure and perhaps a bit full of himself( bc of al the selfies and muscle pics on h...
A. 12 November 2020: You have not even met yet, so you only know him through online chat and some sexting.
I would not read to much in to it, infact i would be inclined to take it all with a pinch of salt.
He is at a different stage in life to where your at, a... (read in full...)
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