Should I Leave or am I to blame?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 3 years. I had insecurities in the beginning but I worked on them and haven't has issues like that for at least 2 years. He first became extremely angry (name calling and violence) in the beginning and said that I had ...
A. 7 January 2021: He really is the perfect boyfriend most of the time?. So in between the bouts of anger, violence and making you feel like shit he is the perfect guy.
By your own admission he is angry, shouts, name calls, and is violent. These are major red flag... (read in full...)
Why did my ex lie?
Q. My ex fiancé and I were going to get married long story short . He moved and three years later he showed me the paper work with al my info which he said he shredded. He ended the relationship he was military and moved away to another county. He t...
A. 7 January 2021: If you have been with your new partner for a year why are still thinking about why your ex lied.
I don't know what the paper work was, but i assume that is was things like banking details, and other personal information. I assume that you would ha... (read in full...)
Would it be disrespectful to my dads new wife if I had a photo of my Mother and Father together in a photo frame on display in my house?
Q. Hi Dear cupid. The question I would like to ask is: Would it be disrespectful to my dads new wife if I had a photo of my Mother and Father together in a photo frame on display in my house? (when I move) My mother sadly passed away two year...
A. 5 January 2021: I'm sorry for your loss.
With regards to the picture I don't see it being a problem putting a picture of your parents up. It's going to be your house.
Your dads new wife is surely mature enough to realise that they are your parents, and of ... (read in full...)
Was I selfish for breaking up with him or was it for the best?
Q. Hi everyone! So 6 months ago, I broke up with my boyfriend of 6 years and I’ve been plagued with guilt since. 2 years ago my bf witnessed/went through something extremely traumatic and was diagnosed with PTSD, during the early days of his diagnosi...
A. 5 January 2021: I don't think that you have done anything wrong, and you was in no way selfish, and yes I think it was for the best.
You was there for him in his time of need, when he was at rock bottom. You were there for him helping him through it and not givi... (read in full...)
My LDR girlfriend's moodiness is getting to me
Q. Hi So I have been with a lady about 1 year. We live in different states and due to covid we havent seen one another in along time. I do still keep in contact when I can. I work full time and she is on disability. She finds things to compl...
A. 4 January 2021: Long distance relationships are not easy at the best of time's, even when your getting on and things are good an LDR is still a huge hurdle.
It's clear the there are difficulties in this relationship, and is coming across as rather one sided. ... (read in full...)
Gf of 2.5 years abruptly moved out - unclear whether I should give up or try to work things out
Q. I am at a loss for what to do with this one. I dated a girl who was 7 years younger than me for over 2.5 years and we lived together for about 7 months. Aside from an issue I have with snoring, things seemed to be going well. 9 days before she moved ...
A. 3 January 2021: I'm sorry to say OP that it sounds like this relationship is over, so i see no point in reaching out to her, and yes i think this is something you have to let go.
All seems a bit random to me, getting home from work and all her bags are packed. ... (read in full...)
Should I keep fighting for us and the man I love or simply let go of him?
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend of 5 years back in July, as for the last 2 years I felt extremely neglected. He had all the time in the world for everyone else apart from me, he put everyone’s needs and emotions first before mine. I tired to ...
A. 3 January 2021: I don't see the point in fighting for your ex, as there is simply nothing to fight for.
He does not sound like a very nice person to me, and will pick you up, put you down and say hurtful things to you, is this really someone you want in your lif... (read in full...)
Do I reach out to my ex when I know he's having a hard time?
Q. I recently discovered that my childhood sweetheart is having a pretty hard time due to losing his job and his relationship breaking down due to all the pressure of the pandemic. Now I’m happily engaged to be married next year, but I am worried...
A. 30 December 2020: He is now someone from your past who is currently having a bad time. I know it sounds harsh but I think you should keep the past in the past where it belongs and put your energies in to your current relationship, and your wedding next year.
I fee... (read in full...)
Why do I end up being the side chick
Q. I am 26 years old and I know there is nothing wrong with me ,but for some reason men who are in a relationship always find there away to me . It’s not that I look desperate or something I am no longer doing online dating etc or looking for a ...
A. 30 December 2020: I think that you have just had a run of bad luck with guys.
I know its hard, makes you feel like you want to give up dating all together. But don't be disheartened, yes you have been messed around, been lied too. But you have to be strong, ... (read in full...)
Do I chose between 2 men that don't have all the qualities I want or wait for the whole package?
Q. Okay, so I am knee deep into online dating right now apart from the matrimonial search my parents are on. Until now I have either fallen in love in accidental ways or intensely dated one person at a time. I don't have enough experience to ob...
A. 30 December 2020: All dating is really a leaning curve. I think you would be better trusting your heart feelings.
Don't be influenced by feelings of lust as this is impermanent and does not last forever.
The first guy is someone who fits what you are looking ... (read in full...)
I’m trapped in a love affair!
Q. What to do if you are trapped in a relationship 3 Well I meat a guy online on a dating side went on a date etc Hit it off pretty well I asked him about his past relationship to make sure that he is really single, and how long he has been single ...
A. 29 December 2020: I agree with Honeypie & youcannotbeserious. This guy is absolutely no good and you should ditch him.
The first thing is he has betrayed your trust and lied to you. If you continue with him do you think you could trust him. I would say certainl... (read in full...)
We broke up and now I'm not invited to the wedding where my daughter is to be the bridesmaid
Q. Hi I broke up with my partner in June and moved out as he wouldn’t we are still on speaking terms and get on better now than we did we have 3 children it was my birthday last week and his family didn’t even get me a birthday card I still get on ...
A. 26 December 2020: I think that you are going to have to be accepting of the fact that you are not in his family circle anymore. The fact that the did not get you a birthday card is irrelevant, you are not with their Son any longer so they really don't have to.
... (read in full...)
Why does My Mum’s boyfriend blatantly lie all the time?
Q. My Mum’s new boyfriend talks so much BS I can’t tell if he’s just joking around or being deadly serious about it. Anyone who is familiar with the Inbetweeners, he’s basically Jay but in his early fifties. He reckons he’s done so much in his life or ...
A. 26 December 2020: He seems harmless enough, some people just want to be the center of attention. If you have done something, he sounds like one of those people who has also done that, but better than you did it.
You Mum seems to be happy with him, by your own admi... (read in full...)
Should I feel like a slut?
Q. Should I feel like a slut?? Ok backstory, I (16/F) I met this guy (16/M) that was attractive and I wanted to get to know him. For a good week we would see each other every day and play basketball and exchange glances. At one point it was night and...
A. 26 December 2020: The good thing about life is as we grow and mature we have the benefit of hindsight. We have all done silly things when we were young, but with hindsight we can look back, recognise that we made a mistake, learn from these mistakes and know not to ... (read in full...)
How to rebuild our friendship? She misunderstood concern for being pesky
Q. Hello I am writing to get your help to resurrect my friendship with a work colleague who works for me. Basically we got to know each other since she had some problems at work and I helped her resolve it. She also had some issues with her present...
A. 26 December 2020: She may very well have told you that you caring and considerate, but when you repeatedly called recieving no response, then texting you have now in her eyes violated her privacy and come across as stalkerish.
If i call someone, a friend, colleagu... (read in full...)
Why does my girlfriend need to talk to this older guy?
Q. My girlfriend talks to this older guy. She is 24 and he is late 40s. When I found out, she said I don’t need to know what i don’t need to worry about - she is very loyal to me. I did not like the fact she spoke to him daily. I became increasingly ...
A. 26 December 2020: So she is talking to a guy considerable older than herself that she met through gaming.
All sounds a bit dodgy to me, as to why a man in his late 40's want to correspond with a 24 year old girl via gaming. They have obviously exchanged details ... (read in full...)
My always broke boyfriend asked for money and when I offered him some he said it wasn't nearly enough
Q. Hello So I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years and hes always broke. Always some scenario happening. I have grown tired of it. His most recent request is hes broke can I help him. I offered 80.00 and he declined. He said it's not enoug...
A. 23 December 2020: I don't think that he is miraculously going to change and start being good with money.
You offered him £80, he rudely and ungratefully declined this offer, saying he needs £500. This is a lot of money OP, and this should serve as a major red flag... (read in full...)
My boyfriend loves to travel but I don't. How do we get past this?
Q. My boyfriend has a longtime passion for travel. He has flown to many places all over the world before we met. I, on the other hand, don't need to travel to be happy. And I don't share his passion. I am also terrified of flying. He is now planning ...
A. 23 December 2020: Its seems like you are both looking for different things from this relationship.
Your not keen an travelling and he is, yes i agree its going to be a hurdle in your relationship.
I think if you changed what you wanted to suit him and went on ... (read in full...)
Is it ok for her to act like this when she has a partner?
Q. My partner and I are both 40. We’ve been together for about 5 months. She’s a fairly recent divorcee who I was friends with for 10 years before we got together. I adore her, but she flirts with other men and it does my head in. She was abused...
A. 22 December 2020: I think there is a big disparity between some harmless banter and flirting and having no intention of taking things further, to purposely flirting around guys with the intention of being unfaithful.
I think you need to elaborate further as to he... (read in full...)
I'm not interested in having my husband's baby. He won't accept no as an answer
Q. Hello all happy holidays I just got engaged and now my husband to be is talking babies already.I did mention I don't have the desire of becoming pregnant again even for him.Im feeling like he is not trying to hear anything I say he wants to adopt ...
A. 21 December 2020: I think you need to think long and hard as to whether getting married is the right decision, or postpone it to give yourself some more thinking space.
You both want completely different things out of life, he wants more kids and you don't. I... (read in full...)
I feel like I lost a lover even though we never met in person
Q. Hello I've matched with a guy on tinder and asked for his WhatsApp number and we started chatting we both agreed on first getting to know each other better, we have a few things in common both introverted and both the boring type eg.dont have a ...
A. 21 December 2020: I know its not the advice that you want to hear, but this guy was pulling your chain all along.
There were red flags very early on in your correspondence with him that would have made most people walk away at that point.
You asked him questi... (read in full...)
I'm unsure of who is the father due to the doctor's calculations
Q. I had sex with my ex boyfriend in August cut off ties right after. Took time to myself and in October began seeing someone. October 13, I had 4 days of heavy cramping and then a heavy period for couple days. Right after that, the new guy I was ...
A. 20 December 2020: Well done for making a stand and having the strenth to be your abusive drug addict ex.
The math does steer toward your ex being the baby's father which is going to present some difficulties if you don't step up and be honest.
I think if your as... (read in full...)
In this relationship, is talking - and maybe flirting - with other men cheating?
Q. have an ethical dilema......is it cheating if I am in a relationship that is more like a friendship( he sleeps in one room, I sleep in the other, he has no intention to marry me because I won't give him kids, I cook for him and take care of him ...
A. 20 December 2020: This does not sound like much of a relationship to me, more a friendship bordering on being together for convenience.
I think you both need to sit down and have a talk about what your relationship status actually is.
Sounds like to me it wo... (read in full...)
Why am I so fixated on him?
Q. I need help. I am a 35 year old woman who has a ridiculous crush on someone who is totally uninterested in me and I cannot for the life of me stop thinking about him. We met over a year ago and had a bit of friendly banter. A few months later he ...
A. 18 December 2020: You can't stop thinking all the time because you have not met anyone else to take your mind off of him.
I know its hard to meet people at the moment due to the current pandemic situation, but even if you started chatting to someone new with the... (read in full...)
I believe he is a scammer. Your opinion?
Q. Hello and thank you ! A man contacted me on Instagram. We've been chatting a couple of months. Seems nice and sweet but I've been very cautious. We're from different countries, different cultures and an age gap. He says he works but whe...
A. 18 December 2020: Yes a scammer for sure, asking to come over to marry him, asking for rent money, these are all major red flags.
Delete him and move on. ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend still in touch with ex her friend with benefits
Q. Hey there. So I have been seeing this girl for 7 months now (in a relationship for 4 months). Around 2 months into seeing her she mentioned she had a Friend with Benefits that she stopped seeing when we started dating. Im completely fine with tha...
A. 14 December 2020: This is someone she has been intimate with, and has a past of a sexual nature.
You were led to believe that contact was cut when you started dating, but you somehow find out that she is still in contact with him. She writes to him, so whether ... (read in full...)
I cringe when my boyfriend touches me
Q. Me and my bf have been together for 7 years. I'd say 3 of those have been really happy. The last four years have been trying due to family problems on my side. It's been very stressful. I ended up having panic attacks and severe anxiety. I went to ...
A. 13 December 2020: You are either attracted to someone or you aren't. It should flow naturally, and not be forced.
You can't make yourself feel attracted to him again. From what you have said in your post some of his actions have been some major red flags.
He d... (read in full...)
Is he just taking it slow?
Q. I met a guy from a dating site a year ago. I am still on the dating site and so is he and he sent a messsge to say that we tried before but I got nasty with him. I told him I could not remember why and I just thought he wasn’t interested in me. He ...
A. 13 December 2020: I can't see that anything will be different a second time around, and a whole year on.
He said you got nasty with him, but you can't remember why?. sounds like a random thing to come out with to me.
The fact he wants to meet straight away ra... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to say I am straight?
Q. I am a man and I do not consider myself bi or gay but I do like an occassional get together with another man from time to time I like to give him oral nothing in return I prefer to give oral to a straight married man My question is is it wrong to ...
A. 7 December 2020: I think if you were in a relationship withy a woman declaring your straight, then she finds out you have performed oral sex on a man she is not going to think that you are straight.
As Honeypie say's there is no law or authority to tell you what... (read in full...)
Dating a married woman now she suddenly becomes distant, what should I do?
Q. hi, been dating a married woman for a month, but chatted for few years before meeting, know everything about each other, even her husband her family and her husbands family kept hassling her and asking about me (because they keep seeing me ...
A. 7 December 2020: Your correct when you say that the marriage is the hurdle here, and its a big hurdle to climb over as well.
You have received some advice from friends, she's a narccisist, got multiple guys's on the go. The fact is no one really knows do they.
... (read in full...)
Why do I think about her sometimes even though it was over 10 years ago.
Q. Hi all! I hope you are all keeping safe and staying healthy. Anyways... Just thinking about in my life. I've been through so much in life. Not just in crushes, but life in general. Just thinking about my high school crush over 10 years ago. She g...
A. 7 December 2020: Is it normal to be still be thinking about a high school crush a decade on?. I would say this is not normal.
Yes we all have fond memories of school/college and people that we dated, or people that we crushed on but feelings were not reciproc... (read in full...)
Is his behaviour is acceptable or controlling in anyway?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for a few months and it has been good for the most part however we fight whenever I wear a shirt that is low cut, something that shows my bra (even the smallest amount) or a skirt, which I wear shorts under. I ...
A. 7 December 2020: I would say that he is showing signs of controlling behaviour.
You have only been together for a few months and already he is wanting to control who you talk to, and what you wear.
If its like this now, then what is it going to be like a few... (read in full...)
Is our relationship going to work if she can never trust me?
Q. My girlfriend keeps checking my phone on the sly, almost every other day. I've lost count of the amount of times I've caught her snooping and her looking all embarrassed about it. She says she can't help herself if I leave it lying around, which I ...
A. 7 December 2020: I think that she has entered into a new relationship to soon and is clearly not healed from the last one.
She should have never embarked on a new relationship until she was 100% over the last one. She needed to work on herself and get into a b... (read in full...)
She said she misses me more but has not responded to my last msg , what should I do?
Q. hi guys, been a long time since i posted here ! Just wanted some quick advice Been chatting to a girl online for about a year now, we finally met up a month ago and sparks flew, we were both a little bit shocked that we got along so wel...
A. 7 December 2020: Although you have been chatting for a year, you have only been on two days, so in that respect its still early days.
I don't think you will be doing yourself any favours if you go chasing her and bombarding her with texts and calls.
I think... (read in full...)
What does it mean that I'm thinking about this colleague?
Q. I have a co-worker who is flirty at work. I told him to stop as I'm in a relationship which he mostly has. But I still see him staring at times and he makes little jokes like "if you aren't texting me you shouldn't be on your phone". I laugh it...
A. 30 November 2020: I guess its just a fantasy, and that's precisely where is should remain, an fantasy.
We all have thoughts that pop into our heads, your only human at the end of the day.
When thoughts of this nature do come into our mind, we all have the abi... (read in full...)
Why doesn’t he seem to want to talk on the phone or meet up?
Q. Been talking to this guy for three weeks. Met on a dating app. He canceled our first meet up do to covid but says he wants to see me and we will meet soon. I told him I want to hear his voice but we have yet to talk on the phone and video chat. We ...
A. 30 November 2020: I think that this guy seems rather flaky to me, so on that basis I think that you should continue with your dating search.
You asked to hear his voice, and you got nothing, and you don't get definite answers.
He is holding back, and being ... (read in full...)
He dumped me for no reason and now won't talk to me. Help me fix it.
Q. We dated for 3 weeks. Everything was amazing. We spent a lot of time together and talked for 7 to 8 hours a day about everything. When we were together it was like we has known each other our entire lives. He told his family, friends and son about ...
A. 24 November 2020: He seemed like he was making all the right noises, and from what you have said he did seem into you.
Personally if i was not into someone i would not tell my family, friends or son about them.
I think this is a problem around his son, it just... (read in full...)
I'm feeling guilty for ending a relationship
Q. So I was in a relationship with someone until Friday. After thinking about everything between us I choose to end it after just under one year. I felt in a lot of ways wee weren't really compatible and tbh wee would be better as friends. I tried ex...
A. 23 November 2020: I agree with your friends and family, you did the right thing by ending things.
You felt like you was not compatible, and felt you were better of as friends. So you did the mature thing of being honest with him and ending the relation... (read in full...)
Husband wants sex less and less. How do I help?
Q. For the past few weeks my husband's been wanting sex less and less, but unlike some questions, I know the reason why... my problem is how to help him. I'm 34, and he's 36. He's admitted to me to spending HOURS downloading "big dick porn" and ...
A. 23 November 2020: I do have to question the authenticity of some of the questions that make it through to here.
He clearly has got to stop looking a porn and making himself feel inadequate, then he needs to give his wife some more attention.
I would say for ce... (read in full...)
I have a boyfriend but can't help being intrigued by a Secret Admirer
Q. Cupids I need help! OK so about a month ago I got a random email from a man who claimed to have known me in the past, telling me that he 'had to get off his chest' that he really fancied me and was crazy about me and that even YEARS later sinc...
A. 23 November 2020: I feel this is a really strange thing to do, and rather creepy if i'm honest.
The fact he is hiding his identity, using a fake email address say's to me that this is a scam. Like he has just found someone at random, collated as much informat... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants me to undress her
Q. My girlfriend really wants me to undress her, i thought for a moment and then agreed to doing it next time we're at her house. We're going to take turns undressing each other but how fast should I undress her, what do I take off first, and what ...
A. 23 November 2020: I very much doubt that this post is genuine.
If by a slim chance it is, given your age bracket it would be inappropriate for any aunt on here to answer this question in the detail that you require. ... (read in full...)
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