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I am on here to listen to your problems, guide you and give you my advice. Some may like what I say, and some may not, but I am not here to make friends. I am simply here because I care about people who need some help with life.

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Where's the sex gone?

Q.   My girlfriend and I have no sexual chemistry. None at all. Every time I bring up anything sexual it’s, ‘we don’t have the time’ or she acts like it’s vulgar and what I’m saying is disgusting - we went to New York recently on our first holiday ...

A.   23 September 2017: What do you do? Well you talk to her. Maybe you are both not sexually compatible. You do need to speak about it and see what is wrong with her, off course intimacy is important in a relationship and if their is no chemistry maybe you are both not ... (read in full...)

Difficult LDR, I feel I'm becoming close to my ex. Should I isolate myself from all girls so I don't find myself slipping?

Q.   Greetings Agony Aunts and Uncles, To give you a bit of background Im in a LDR with mg GF for about a month now and the separation is killing us. We met in college and our both living near our families in different states. Unless one of us is willi...

A.   23 September 2017: 1. No it is not wrong to feel the way that you do, and also you are just comforted because you miss your girlfriend, I have no doubt that you wouldn't cheat and you should feel the same. Have more faith in yourself. 2. No if use have no plans to... (read in full...)

He was still receiving photos from his ex!

Q.   So I found out that my boyfriend of 9 months still received pictures from his ex. He knew that it bothers me everytime she send texts, call or send selfie pictures. However, I do understand that my bf has no control of what his ex is sending him. ...

A.   23 September 2017: Off course you are not being shallow their is more to this than just a picture, if he is saving them then he is still thinking about her, and if she is sending pictures like that asking him questions then she is still in to him and wants to keep ... (read in full...)

Is the guy I'm dating being a jerk?

Q.   I started dating this guy about a month ago and we've been on four dates so far.. We haven't gone all the way yet but have done some stuff in bed, as well as the usual things like cinema etc. TBF to him he does have his good points like he pays for ...

A.   22 September 2017: From what you have wrote my guess is that is just his personality, I doubt he is being a Jerk or that he is being nasty, my guess is he is trying to be funny and humor you. If you are not feeling a connection then it is best to end things now. ... (read in full...)

He was still receiving photos from his ex!

Q.   So I found out that my boyfriend of 9 months still received pictures from his ex. He knew that it bothers me everytime she send texts, call or send selfie pictures. However, I do understand that my bf has no control of what his ex is sending him. ...

A.   22 September 2017: No you are not acting immature at all. I would be devastated if my husband was receiving pictures from an ex and saving them on to his email, why does he feel the need to keep then, obviously he still thinks off her and looks at them. You have every ... (read in full...)

I desperately want to reconcile with my ex husband. He had sex with me after he had broken up with his girlfriend but hasn't contacted me since

Q.   This is a long story and I apologize but I really need some advice from some neutral parties here. I am wanting to reconcile with my ex-husband. We were married for 4 years. He was and still is the love of my life but he left me for another ...

A.   22 September 2017: My guess is that it was rebound. He said he loved you, but he cheated on you, and not only that but never apologized for leaving you for another woman until last night? That is shocking. I understand you love him but surely you deserve better than ... (read in full...)

I didn't bleed so is my hymen still intact after having sex lots of times?

Q.   hello, well my problem is i had sexual intercourse several times but i did not bleed in any of them, so i'm wondering is it possible that my hymen is still intact??...

A.   22 September 2017: Not everyone bleeds when they loose their virginity. Completely normal so no need to worry. ... (read in full...)

I am unhappy at home, and flirting with my ex boyfriend

Q.   I am married for nearly 4 years and lived together for 5 years . Since having my son last year , everything has changed . We both very good with looking after our son but My partner seems to be on the phone so much , which has been locked fo...

A.   22 September 2017: It seems to me that you are bored with this marriage. Honestly it will need the both off you to work on it to save it. All I can say is do not stay with him just so he gets a visa, you only have one life and you should live it. Firstly maybe you ... (read in full...)

We were such good friends, now she wont even talk to me

Q.   Slightly off topic of love and relationships but wondering if someone can shine some light over a situation with a close friend. I'm broken, torn, lost and really struggling to come to terms with the loss of my best friend, for the simple reaso...

A.   22 September 2017: Honestly it sounds like she is selfish and only used you. I know that is difficult to hear, but a true friend would be there for you and not lash out at you. A true friend will share problems but also listen to your problems. Honestly I know it is ... (read in full...)

I want more, he leads me on but in the end wants just sex. It's he just a player?

Q.   Hello! I have been friends with this guy since sophomore year of college and I graduated last year. He's 25 so yeah we are still young, but I feel like we have a good vibe going with one another. We used to hang out and talk about everything and ...

A.   22 September 2017: Aw Sweetie it is obvious that he is playing you. Don't allow him to do that, because you will never be able to move on and will continue to hurt. He doesn't have the answers for you, which means he sees you as a friend and enjoys the sex. Him ... (read in full...)

Is this a genuine concern or is he blowing me off?

Q.   My bf and I have been together for a couple months. He treats me really well and is different from the other guys that I dated. One thing though that has really started to worry me, is him trying to drop me off at home early in the day. He works ...

A.   22 September 2017: If you are feeling neglected then talk to him and tell him how you are feeling, it is the only way it will be resolved. ... (read in full...)

I want to marry this woman and find it hard to let her go! Please help!

Q.   Help help help. In a previous column I told everyone about how my x dumped me after 3 1/2 years by text. I also found that she had a dating profile. We talked on the phone. She says she feels like a horrible person for what she did and we had long ...

A.   22 September 2017: The thing is OP its not about her past, if she has lied about that, then what else is she lying to you about? How can you trust a liar? I know I couldn't. I understand that you are hurting at the moment. But do you really want to live your life with... (read in full...)

I had an affair with my ex husband's cousin and don't know what to do with the feelings I have

Q.   I am married, my husband is my best friend and I really don't deserve him. This is my second marriage to the same man, we married,divorced cos he left me for someone else and we were both very young first time anyway. We got back together and were...

A.   21 September 2017: Your husband was honest with you and now you need to be honest to him. This marriage will never work unless you tell him the truth. Your feelings are making you ill, but what about the guilt that you have? Surely you cannot live the rest off your ... (read in full...)

How can I last longer the first time?

Q.   I just got into a relationship, its been quite a few months in. We are about to hit 3rd base and this is my first time someone will give me a handjob or even a blowjob. I don't think I can last for more than 30 seconds. Any tips on how to last ...

A.   21 September 2017: No tips just go with the flow, you will get more comfortable and last longer as time goes on. It is quite normal for men starting out to orgasm quick, nothing to be worried about. Just make sure you give your girlfriend plenty off attention as well.... (read in full...)

What are your thoughts on surprising someone that hates surprises & is worried about money?

Q.   we've been Trying to conceive for over a year and a half now and both of us are self employed and super stressed out. So I decided that for my husbands birthday I would surprise him with a trip to the Netherlands to see this band that he loves! but ...

A.   21 September 2017: Personally if this was my husband and he had money worries and hated surprises then I wouldn't surprise him. It might take the fun out off it for both off you if you keep it quiet. I honestly think the best thing to do in this situation is to sit ... (read in full...)

She's asked me for advice-Can I be honest and tell her she's in a bad relationship?

Q.   Dear Aunts and Uncles, I need some advice on should I say what I think or... be polite and lie. I have 2 cousins who are like sisters to me. One of them is having problems with her papers. She's been living in a foreign country for the past 7 y...

A.   21 September 2017: Truthfully if she is like a sister then you should be honest with her, but do it in a personal message or phone call, not where everyone else can read it. If I was close enough to someone as a sister then I would be honest. Yes she might get upset ... (read in full...)

He's rejected me but is open to having sex. I'm upset but tempted to, since I'll be bored and alone in his city.

Q.   I apologize in advance...this is a long one! I met a guy on Tinder back in March of this year. I was going to be in San Francisco for a few days and wanted to meet people while there so I changed my location to SF and started talking to him. ...

A.   21 September 2017: I honestly don't know how you can allow a man to treat you like this. Me personally it would really affect my confidence if I knew a man wanted a girlfriend but only used me for sex. He has told you so many times, yet you are not truly accepting it ... (read in full...)

I'm Open-Minded but His Porn Habit & Denials are Alienating Me!

Q.   my husband who is 10 years older than me is watching porn on a daily basis and playing virtual reality porn games,I know because he,s not very clever at deleting his history.He shows no interest in me even though I go out of my way to look nice and ...

A.   21 September 2017: If you feel you cannot talk to him and he is continuing to lie to you then maybe you need to show him how serious you are. Instead off bringing up the porn talk about your intimate life. If he cannot talk to you about that then I suggest you go to ... (read in full...)

How do I get this woman out of my life without hurting feelings or jeopardising the other relationship with the mutual friend?

Q.   I was on here a year or two back about a friend I have had for a while who was always putting me down, trying to be smart and reminding me in her jokey way of any 'blunders' I may have made in years gone by. She is friends with another mutual f...

A.   20 September 2017: It is okay to invite the friend you like to occasions and ask her not to invite the other women. If she annoys you then stop hanging out with her. Sometimes in life we have to be cruel to be kind. If she is being hurtful to you then stop meeting up ... (read in full...)

Is this something I can fix by correcting a few actions in our relationship? Do I give her space and trust that she will end up with me? What do I do?

Q.   My gf of 1.5 years recently told me that she likes a guy from work as as more than friends but is unsure about what to do. She said she loves me and she doesn't love him because it is too early to tell. She said she recognizes that it is unfair to ...

A.   20 September 2017: Honestly I couldn't stand their while my partner told me he liked someone else and is going to keep seeing them to see what happens. She might be to honest for her good but I couldn't sit and wait. If it was me I would be away. She doesn't have much ... (read in full...)

Do gay men get asked about oral sex by straight men often?

Q.   Been with my new girlfriend for eight months,she gets off a couple times in a half hour, myself she wishes I would,but I don't get off that easy, the sex is real good, I've try to last a lot longer all my life , a quickly is a half hour or so, if I ...

A.   20 September 2017: I assume that if you are wanting this to be a reality then you must be leaning towards being bisexual. While that is perfectly fine it is still considered cheating wanting to perform a sex act on someone. Plus that person might not be interested in ... (read in full...)

I thought things were progressing well so why does she seemed to have slowed down?

Q.   A few days ago I was on cloud nine. I had finally gone out with a great girl after a couple weeks of chatting on Facebook since we were both moving back to our hometown. We clicked really well while we were chatting, she was very responsive and f...

A.   20 September 2017: It sounds like she is slowly backing away from you whatever her reasons might be. Take a back seat and see how she reacts. ... (read in full...)

I was drunk and slapped my boyfriend across the face!

Q.   I feel really bad admitting this but i have been with my partner five months and i think the world of him. But the other evening we was drinking and to the point where i literally don't remember what was said. But he went into the kitchen and when i ...

A.   20 September 2017: You won't do it again if you give up drinking. If drink allows you to behave like this, you might be much happier in life without it. It is the only solution that I can see for this anyway.... (read in full...)

Should I give my old teacher this small gift?

Q.   Last month I went on holidays to do a language course in another country. I told that to a teacher of my uni and she recommended me a shop which of course I visited and liked a lot. I bought some presents for my family and friends and also something ...

A.   20 September 2017: I think its a lovely idea. I get presents at the end off most school years from the children and it is so special. ... (read in full...)

Heart says carry on, head says we are now toxic! Advice needed!

Q.   Hi. So my 8 year relationship seems to be at its end and I've been given an ultimatum. We split up or we stay together and try to make it work. Some background, we are a young couple, we have been together from a young age and have been through ...

A.   20 September 2017: You need to put yourself first. I understand he loves you, but if he is stressed it might be because you both are just not getting on. Living like this is not healthy for either off you. ... (read in full...)

Why do people bad mouth their significant others?

Q.   Why do guys complain about their gf/wives but then not leave? I have a coworker that always complains about his wife - I never bring her up but somehow he will say something about her nagging or sound so dis interested in any event that they ...

A.   20 September 2017: I don't think this is a man thing, I have heard plenty of women give out about there partners as well. I would imagine its not as bad as they make it out to be and that they have issues with themselves as well as their home life. ... (read in full...)

Is this a genuine concern or is he blowing me off?

Q.   My bf and I have been together for a couple months. He treats me really well and is different from the other guys that I dated. One thing though that has really started to worry me, is him trying to drop me off at home early in the day. He works ...

A.   20 September 2017: It sounds to me like he is just not that interested in a serious relationship, if he was he would be making more off an effort. Do you guys ever go out as a couple? Go for meals? Or is it always just you going to his place?... (read in full...)

How do I get him to understand my loneliness?

Q.   Hi everyone. I'm just looking for a bit of advice. I am married to my partner who I've known since we were kids. I've been feeling so lonely recently as I feel like I've lost connection with my friends. I work and sit at home waiting for my husba...

A.   20 September 2017: This sounds like me and my husband, but the only difference is I enjoy my own space when we are both relaxing after work. He plays his playstation and I watch my soaps. Why not agree to one date night a week, no distractions, cook a nice meal, light ... (read in full...)

I want to marry this woman and find it hard to let her go! Please help!

Q.   Help help help. In a previous column I told everyone about how my x dumped me after 3 1/2 years by text. I also found that she had a dating profile. We talked on the phone. She says she feels like a horrible person for what she did and we had long ...

A.   20 September 2017: In your last post you explained that people said she slept around even though she told you she only had a few partners, and now you want to marry her? What has changed from calling er a slut and a liar? Honestly do you think you could trust this ... (read in full...)

I want to marry my cousin's grand daughter.

Q.   My aunt has a son.That would make him and I first cousins. My first cousin has 3 daughters. Lets say the oldest girl is named Tasha.Lets go a bit further and say Tasha has 2 daughters.One name Mary and the other one named Sue.Is it wrong for me to ...

A.   20 September 2017: I find this strange, what have you in common with a 25 year old? Does she even know that you are interested in her like that?... (read in full...)

Something is holding me back from having sex with my boyfriend

Q.   I keep stopping myself from having sex with my boyfriend. I'm still a virgin and my boyfriend knows this. The last two times we have spent the night together, he has tried to initiate sex which I have no problem with. I feel i want to have sex...

A.   20 September 2017: You are scared off the unknown it is pretty normal. Your body is probably turned on but your mind is holding you back. If he is being rough then tell him. He might not know any better. Try using lots of lube and don't forget protection.... (read in full...)

She has bruises and I think she's cheating with the Baby Daddy

Q.   My lady gets mad couse I pointed out two bruises on her back she didn't have before last time we had sex was 5 days ago she takes of one morning to school with baby Dady for conference metting regarding son school I find her on find I phone she ...

A.   20 September 2017: I bruise all the time. You are the one with the issues here, why has she cheated before and now you are paranoid? It is obvious you don't trust her and you need to work out why. It is not normal to track someones phone.... (read in full...)

My girlfriend wanted an open relationship but I can't cope with it.

Q.   I'm struggling with the pain and shock involved in starting an open relationship. I've been dating my girlfriend for about 6 months. Recently we agreed to open the relationship and allow each other to have sex with other people. She's the one wh...

A.   20 September 2017: There is no other way to get over that pain accept acknowledge the truth and talk to her about how you feel. You need to be honest with her, and if she is not prepared to give up other men then the best thing that you can do is walk away.... (read in full...)

My girlfriend wont cut ties with her ex!

Q.   This might be a bit long. After a few relationships, i decided to try and get together with a girl recommended to me by my friend's girlfriend. I'll call her Agnes. This happened great, especially the first 3/4 months - we had our issues to ir...

A.   20 September 2017: Please don't ever push a woman to the ground again. Now on to your issue, it is clear she still loves her ex and she is going as far as to lie to you so she can keep in contact with him. Can you honestly trust her after this? I wouldn't be able to.... (read in full...)

My ex came back into my life only to leave again!

Q.   He reached out to me after about 6 months of not speaking, during that time he was dating someone else. We ended up meeting up to talk, and we had great conversation. He apologized for things that wet wrong with us and opened up to me that "he just ...

A.   20 September 2017: He went back to you because you where familiar to him and someone who he knew he would probably get sex with. I am sorry that he done this to you. Don't blame yourself or feel that you are old enough to know better we all make mistakes when we love ... (read in full...)

How should I handle one of my biggest regrets and the depression it is causing me?

Q.   When I was in high school, I was so afraid of being bullied that I became a bully myself. I was a immature kid and the way I was thinking was completely wrong. About a year after I graduated, one of the kids that I bullied, Zach, died from ...

A.   20 September 2017: If I am being honest I am struggling to have any sympathy for you, simply because I had a horrific time at national and secondary school getting bullied, and it has messed up my life. Kids can be so cruel and you will never no the damage that you ... (read in full...)

The sex is just not working out. What are we doing wrong?

Q.   My boyfriend often complains that we don't have enough sex. But he doesn't initiate ot, or try to turn me on. The other day we were hugging in bed then he rolled over, saying that he had to because he was horny ... like, sex could've happened if he ...

A.   20 September 2017: Because it is funny to joke about rape? Honestly some people have an odd sense of humor. From reading your update it looks like their is a lot wrong with this relationship and if he is clingy and needy then he is not going to change. By all means ... (read in full...)

Uh Oh .... this guy I really like is brother to my ex!

Q.   I met this guy and happen to fall deeply in love with him though am not sure he knows about it but just when I was about summoning the courage to tell him how I feel....it all turned out he is a brother to my ex. I really don't know what to do and ...

A.   20 September 2017: Had you not met his brother and family when you where dating? Was it serious between you and the brother? I think it is best to avoid him as this can cause a lot off upset in his family. ... (read in full...)

Should I stay .... or maybe I should go

Q.   Hi dear Cupid, so I'll break this down in for form.. Myself (24) partner (23) - together three years Before I met him - I saved $13,000. Dating him - started going halves in things cause I thought it was a great idea. In three years - partner ...

A.   19 September 2017: You might love him, but he does not love you. I will say again what I have said to you in the past. Move out and move on with your life. Don't allow him to bully you in to giving him any more money. Also no your half off the bond should go to you. ... (read in full...)

I love my boyfriend but am looking elsewhere

Q.   My situation.. I met my boyfriend a year ago while while I was living overseas, he is from that country. We ended up getting into a relationship quite fast. Our parents met each other and everything was great. A week later or so, he had to g...

A.   19 September 2017: I will say the same again, it sounds like this guy wants to hook up with you, he doesn't seem to be very mature when he is telling you to look for him when you get bored off your boyfriend. I am assuming that you are younger than stated as your post ... (read in full...)

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