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Does this message mean I'm dumped? Help!

Tagged as: Breaking up, Teenage, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (7 July 2013) 16 Answers - (Newest, 12 July 2013)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, anonymous writes:

Me and my bf have been arguing ALOT and we had a huge row because he has no time too see me this morning he said 'Right now I am screaming at my phone because I can't put into text what I want to say in retaliation and so it doesn't ruin your day, I am sparing you this and you can't even think about me or my feelings I have had a rough few months so just fucking leave me alone and I'm turning off my phone so contact is futile' I had sent him a lot of texts because he hadn't replied does that mean I am dumped?

we have been together a year last week and now I hate the thought that I have lost him, Usually he says things out of anger just so he can cool off or does this mean he literally dumped me, I don't know what to do, other than just leave it and wait... he has never reacted like this before and its all my fault...

hellppp!! what did that message mean?!?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

ok thanks, but he has completely turned his phone off not just cutting contact with me but his mates too, a couple of his mates asked why he isn't replying... I said I dunno he isn't replying to me either,his messages (he doesn't have facebook or any other social networking type other than his phone) also there is a gig thing tomorrow and everyone I know is going, my mates and his mates kinda mix but I have no idea if he is gonna come or not, So I don't know if I might bump into him tomorrow...

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A male reader, DV1 United States +, writes (12 July 2013):

DV1 agony auntYou don't say anything. Just go about your business and live your life. Don't stop your life for anyone

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A reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I have stopped but I don't know what I am meant to say when we get back to school

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (10 July 2013):

So_Very_Confused agony auntstop texting him

and consider some counseling since it's not about being needy or crazy.

I think it should be mandatory for all teens to have a therapist or counselor at least once a month for all teen years...

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

That message you told me to send him was exactly what I said in the previous message just before he totally flew off the handle and that was his reply to it! I said this but in more detail... I'm sorry about everything I really don't want to argue anymore, I love you but for this to work you need to tell me how you feel about things instead of bottling it up just tell me your decision on if we should stay together or not (he has problems with opening up to people and I'm the only person he really talks to about things at school (other than his family) he tells me more than he tells his mates but he's in a difficult place I tried to be understanding but he took it the wrong way!!

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2013):

firstly i think you should text him ONCE, apologize, for all the messages AND whatever you were fighting over (it seems you are at fault here) tell him you love him, (if you do) and explain to him that you understand he needs his space now, And that you will be waiting for him when he decides he is ready. you need to put his feelings first here, no matter how much it hurts you. after that, take your phone and duct tape it somewhere you cant get at it, until it goes off, meaning he is ready now. best of luck

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A reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

okay... when I say I can't yeh i'm in control of what i'm doing and I think saying I need counselling is over dramatic... you really don't know me so you can't exactly judge me! I just want to talk to him:( not rant and make a big drama, just sort things out and work through it like we both do with our arguments...

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A female reader, Tisha-1 United States +, writes (8 July 2013):

Tisha-1 agony auntYou need to call on one of your friends to be your go-to person when you feel you have to text him.

It's part of getting control of your actions. You may not be able to control how you feel but you certainly can control how you act. Part of growing up. There are women and men in their middle age who haven't learned that yet and who still let the drama control them.

You are creating your own drama. When you realize this, and watch yourself doing it, you will be on your way to one of life's major lessons.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

ITS HARD I CAN'T!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2013):

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sorry didn't finish my last answer but I sent him a text saying I have free lunches if he wants to talk so now I have to wait but would anyone know how long it may be before he cools down?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2013):

It means he wants you to stop contacting himf or a while till he coools down.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2013):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I know I act clingy ad stuff that's my downfall I can't ever let things go an I appreciate the answers saying he needs alot of space he is really upset with me I know that and btw we are both 15 years old but I know I have to leave him alone now! But I have to go on a trip for two weeks an this week and

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2013):

It mean you are overbearing and that he is extremely upset with you, but is tryibg hard to be a gentleman and not curse you out.

Saying that he wants to be left alone means that...sending him tons of texts because he does not respond is clingy and desperate. Leave him alone and let him be. If he wants tk calm down , let him come to you.

YOur attitude is driving him away. Cease contact, if he is iinterested he will turb around.

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A female reader, adviceneeded01 United Kingdom +, writes (7 July 2013):

I disagree with these guys, I dont think that means you are dumped, I think he just needs time too cool off, you said you messaged him repeatedly , that will drive him insane, and you cus he wasnt replying. give him time to cool off, and if he doesnt contact you, contact him and apologise, sometimes we have to bruise our own ego just to make peace..

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (7 July 2013):

Honeypie agony auntI would just assume he DID dump you, anyways do you really think it's OK for a guy to talk to his GF that way?

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A male reader, DV1 United States +, writes (7 July 2013):

DV1 agony auntYes, it means you guys are done. Moving on...

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