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| | DoubleM's profile:DoubleM currently resides in Fort Worth Texas, but has lived in southern California (Hollywood), Hawaii, Europe and North Africa as well as Texas. Attended the University of Texas. Now single forever after three marriages, one of 20 years. Mainly tries to help with sexual issues. Views and opinions are very permissive. |
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Should I come clean and tell him the truth?
Q. Ok, I need some general help here, I am really into this guy, who says he's into me but nothing too heavy, I didn't want a FWB but it's what we have, all we have done is kissed and some oral, he now wants sex but I have told him I am not ready yet ...
A. 20 November 2009: The truth is always best, and 27 is very young. Yes, the guy would be thrilled.... (read in full...)
How can I explain this to him so we end on good terms?
Q. I met my ex boyfriend through work although i didn't want to start anything in the beginning because i had just broken up with someone and he lived a very long way away from me. After around 6-9 months we started talking every day on the phone, ...
A. 20 November 2009: As usual, I must agree with "satindesire," a young but very wise advisor here. Sometimes, it is best to let some relationships dissolve. Put this in your past and chalk it up to experience. You have a future, which hopefully will include a loving ... (read in full...)
He just wont touch, kiss or hold me...and we've only been married 46 days!
Q. Hi. I've been married for just under 2 months, been with him 5 years. We're both 25. Lived together for 3 years. In the past 2 years, our sex life has diminished drastically. Mind you, in the past two years, he's been in University doing a ...
A. 20 November 2009: Yes, it is a long read, but I tried to assimilate most of it. An answer to the question you finally ask is difficult. Your dissertation only raises the primary question, which is, "Why did you marry this guy?" ... (read in full...)
Sexually frustrated new mom... help!
Q. My husband and I are very young. We have been together for two + years, I got married when i was 18 and my husband was my first sex partner! I just a few weeks ago had a baby, our first. I am very sexually frustrated, (you can't have sex for at ...
A. 20 November 2009: Wow, The anonymous female reader seems to bolster the primary point that I've tried to make. That is, if you assume the role of doing all or most of the giving, then it is so easy for the other to begin accepting without reciprocation. Every ... (read in full...)
Do nice guys finish last? Help me get a gf!
Q. I'm a 25 year old virgin and I've never been in a relationship I feel at this point it's almost hopeless, the bad part is, is that, I'm almost ready to accept the fact that I will live out my life being alone and never understanding wh...
A. 20 November 2009: Hey, it's never too late. You are just a young whipper snapper, as often said in Texas. lol
I know that the the word "confidence" may be hard for you to grasp and exude, but please believe me, it is important. Be confident that you truly ARE a nice... (read in full...)
Bf has 11 inch penis... how can we make sex more comfortable for me?
Q. Please take this seriously. Me and my boyfriend have been trying to have sex for a while, we have been going out for 5 years and trying for the last few months. It is really hurting me, and it is becoming unpleasant, we just end up arguing....
A. 20 November 2009: To be honest with you, I'm glad that I'm a man of good size but nothing close to 11 inches. That is almost ridiculous. I think that he should simply use about half of his size rather than plunging most or all of it - if he cares about your comfort.... (read in full...)
How can I make sex more fun?
Q. I am thick and i am a little shy at times so my main question is how to ignore shyness and just let loose when having sex with my boyfriend? I also want to know how to make our sex relationship more fun. What can i do to show the real me because i ...
A. 20 November 2009: If you are "very freaky" and love sex, then we must presume that you have also been fairly adventurous. But without knowing what kinds of activities you are comfortable doing, how can we possibly suggest what you can "do to show the real" you? ... (read in full...)
Does this mean his still likes me?
Q. Okay, a week ago me and my bf ended it. I did. Today I texted him telling him I wanted to talk. He said sure. After class, he asked how was my week without him. I said good and asked him how his week was. He said um good. Does that mean he like me ...
A. 20 November 2009: Sounds to me that you are still hooked on the dude, and he knows it.... (read in full...)
Is there a problem with falling in love with a girl who is older than you?
Q. Hi cupid, i have serious question about my relationship with a girl who i met on the internet. am 22 and she's 23. she senior me with a year. she knows that. we have dated about two months now and we also shared pictures and web cam.she's very happy ...
A. 20 November 2009: Not a problem.... (read in full...)
Ex still wants sexual favors... WHY?
Q. my bf and I live together but have just recently broken up. He asks me for hand-jobs, why? We are broken up but he asks me for hand jobs and also asked me if I still want something from him. I said I don't want anything sexual from him because we ...
A. 20 November 2009: Why? Because he still thinks that he can have the fun without commitment, as long as you are willing to provide it.... (read in full...)
Sexually frustrated new mom... help!
Q. My husband and I are very young. We have been together for two + years, I got married when i was 18 and my husband was my first sex partner! I just a few weeks ago had a baby, our first. I am very sexually frustrated, (you can't have sex for at ...
A. 20 November 2009: This makes me feel very sad for you, because obviously you have married extremely young, and to a young man who is quite immature. I sincerely hope that your husband will soon understand his selfishness.
Please allow me to offer some possible answ... (read in full...)
Why wont he make the first move when we have sex?
Q. Okay, so I am wondering. Why is it that I ALWAYS have to get it going? In order to have sex, why can't he ever do it? And how can I make it more comfortable to give him a bj? I mean I used to swallow but one day it was just so much that I gagg...
A. 20 November 2009: In regard to gagging on large ejaculations, I agree that position can possibly make a difference. The anon male reader's advice may be one way (kneeling), and another is similar to the doggie position reversed.
I'll try to describe. The female assu... (read in full...)
Is oral sex on a woman better than intercourse for them?
Q. Is oral sex on a woman better than intercourse? I'm better at sex when I'm tipsy, I come out of my shell. Is that normal??...
A. 20 November 2009: Not much information provided, and I'm not sure whether the poster is heterosexual or lesbian, but I basically agree with "strontiumdog," "satindesire and "Roadster73." It depends on the woman, and even more on the skill and experience of the ... (read in full...)
Do girls like macho or caring guys?
Q. Hi There Everybody...I'm 18 Years Old And I Just Wanted to Know If Girls Like It If A Guy is Macho Or Just Kind,Caring And Fun Loving...Cos I Am Not macho...But I Do Like Having Fun And just being normal...And Watching Anime!!!...And I Dont Wanna ...
A. 19 November 2009: Women like men who are confident and caring, and I agree with "eyeswideopen," do not capitalize most every word you write.... (read in full...)
Advice please... How can I make it up to my girlfriend and also to karma?
Q. Hi, I fell in love with my best friend's girl but somehow knew it was wrong the first time (The hardest thing I have ever done and the most pain ive ever felt) and was frightened of the fact it might blow up in my face so I went after someone el...
A. 19 November 2009: What God would punish love?... (read in full...)
He cant cum when I give him a blowjob because of the big "mental' component to it! What am I doing wrong?
Q. Hi Guys, I've been going out with a friend of mine for about a month now, and although we're both VERY different we get along great. However, the other night I decided to give him a blowjob, which he thoroughly appreciated (OK, who wouldn't), but a...
A. 19 November 2009: Some guys have an aversion to cumming in a girl's mouth because of ingrained beliefs that sex is essentially dirty and nasty. Often, such thoughts are instilled by religion or other societal pressures. In some cases, a guy may feel that the girl ... (read in full...)
How to approach the subject of giving and receiving oral?
Q. Hi i need some information on how to approach a girl whilst in foreplay and to either give or recieve oral?? Because im too shy to ask for a blowjob and im scared to pull her pants down and give her orar due to she might freak out and run off or hit ...
A. 19 November 2009: Well I understand that the age of consent to sexual activity is 16 in the Isles, so I'll try to advise. Foreplay, as you say, usually includes a lot of kissing, fondling and that sort of thing, but may advance to such activities as sucking breasts ... (read in full...)
Any tips on giving my boyfriend oral? And was my experience last night normal?
Q. Hi, just a couple of questions. My boyfriend fingered me last night and got a different 'spot' to normal. It normally feels really good, but is over in a few seconds, this felt ok but my legs were shaking the whole time, is this normal? Also, I w...
A. 19 November 2009: The shaking is probably normal. Just wait until you climax, then you'll REALLY feel a lot of shaking going on.
In regard to giving oral, there is really no bad way to go about that except to remember one thing: Keep your teeth out of it (off of it).... (read in full...)
I feel so stupid because I fooled around with this guy at work!
Q. I need some help, I feel so stupid. This is long - sorry. Me and a guy at work have been flirting for a long time I have always said never to a work thing but one day we were both working late and one thing let to another and we kissed, a bit la...
A. 19 November 2009: Well, I'll take a slightly different slant than some of the other responders. If your age range is properly stated, then you are certainly entitled in the Western World to enjoy some indulgence. As you stated, "I thought well I might as well have ... (read in full...)
She reaches climax too soon!
Q. hey this is my first time asking for help...anyway.... I'm 19 and I love my girlfriend so much,but I'm having problems with her in bed. What I mean is that she cums really really fast. 5 minutes fast. This is frustrating caus it takes me about 45 ...
A. 19 November 2009: If your girlfriend is willing, consider oral stimulation. Specifically, she may be able to accelerate your pleasure with fellatio (blow jobs), whether to completion or at least to heighten your arousal to near ejaculation. However, it is surprisi... (read in full...)
21 and still a virgin, but lead a busy life! What can I do?
Q. well,i dont know from where to start.im 21years old and im still a virgin.sometimes is quite embarrassing for me.i dont know but in any relationship i have failed..this is giving me a some depression.i mean,i wanted to to with somebody spe...
A. 18 November 2009: Most of the replies so far have been from sympathetic virgins. That's good, but perhaps you might appreciate some input from a much older man who was sexually active at a relatively young (14) age.
My observation would be that it does not much matt... (read in full...)
Getting it up (first time)
Q. Hi people, I have a concern I'd like to get input on. I'm 18-22 and a virgin; I was about to have sex several times after making out but every time I couldn't get a full erection, or of I did, it fell off quickly..I just didn't seem to be that ...
A. 18 November 2009: It may be more complex than we can advise here, based on the unverified response, but certainly too much pornography could possibly screw anybody up in regard to having normal heterosexual relations.... (read in full...)
I've got a boyfriend now so how can I stop this urge?
Q. I'm 18 and i have a problem and i need help. well in the past i had this one guy that i gave blow jobs to and now that im in a relationship i have nothing else to give because i love the person im with. so one day they asked me to come over but i ...
A. 18 November 2009: Your writing is hard to follow and understand. Please forgive, but the English language can be written clearly. It is difficult for me to tell with whom you are, or have been giving the blow jobs, but if your new boyfriend wants oral and knows that ... (read in full...)
Getting it up (first time)
Q. Hi people, I have a concern I'd like to get input on. I'm 18-22 and a virgin; I was about to have sex several times after making out but every time I couldn't get a full erection, or of I did, it fell off quickly..I just didn't seem to be that ...
A. 18 November 2009: Well, that's a bit unusual at your age. Could be nerves, in other words, you may be so uptight about it, especially after several failed or unsatisfactory attempts, that you are obsessed with this so-called erection problem.
Honestly, assuming that... (read in full...)
Make up sex! Is this normal?
Q. Why is it that every single time that me and my fiance have a falling out we always end up having make-up sex? I've told him before that I think he chooses to bring up an argument a lot of times is just so we can have sex. And sometimes this makes ...
A. 18 November 2009: Well, I've heard about this kind of thing since forever. In my opinion, it is kind of a makeup resolution that never really gets at the root issues that are causing ongoing conflict. But since I have never applied such a strategy, I don't really ... (read in full...)
I am a virgin. Should I sleep with my boyfriend of 5 weeks?
Q. ok, im a virgin, my boyfriend of 5 weeks is not, he wants sex (he's 17). I want it so bad, when im around him i feel safe and happy. (i come from a background with alot of abuse and so does he but he has been drinking and smoking since he was in ...
A. 18 November 2009: As you say, he is "really good at getting girls and playing with them for awhile and then leaving." You are next.... (read in full...)
Can I get herpes from giving him a hand job?
Q. I met a 46 year old man the other night and I am 23.... We ended up making out and things started to go further and he told me he has herpes on his genitals. He said it was over for me to give him a hand job but not oral. So I did. He was not ...
A. 18 November 2009: Probably not from the hand job, but kissing can also transmit oral herpes, with which many carriers also may infected. I have no personal experience, but I think that kissing someone with cold sores at the corners of the mouth may be quite risky. ... (read in full...)
I get overly excited with my bf...and it's embarrassing! Is this normal?
Q. Um, so, this is very embarassing. But I can't ask for advice anywhere else but on the internet, because, well, it IS way too embarassing. So, to get straight to the point, I've been dating a guy for 2 months. We've grown really close together, ...
A. 18 November 2009: Perfectly normal. It is nature's way (hormones) of telling you that you are physically quite ready for you know what. But you have to decide for yourself whether it would be right for you at this time, and with this young man, considering that you ... (read in full...)
A bad experience in bed!
Q. I had an experience in bed the other night and I am not sure how I should react to it. I was having sex with my boyfriend, I was lying on my stomach and he was on top of me. We were both very drunk. Then he stuck it my bum. I dont know whethe...
A. 18 November 2009: Must pretty much agree with the female anon. You are apparently of legal age in Aussie land, and was naked in bed with a boyfriend with whom you have a sexual relationship. And admittedly intoxicated. He was certainly inappropriate to physically ... (read in full...)
He goes "soft" and I don't know what to do???
Q. How do you fix a guy's problem... I mean like me and the guy I like a lot!, where in the middle of doing it and he just went soft. I looked it up on webmd and it said that it cause be caused by too much drinking which he does drink a bit too much ...
A. 17 November 2009: You cannot "fix" a guy's drinking problem, and I agree with "ffogalily" that too much alcohol is the likely cause. HE has to address the problem.... (read in full...)
My wife masturbates in bed after she thinks I fall asleep...
Q. Ladies (guys you might want to read as well in case you want to do a little "sleuthing"), I am a 36 year old happily married man and need input if anyone is willing to share. My wife and I have been together since 2001 and about a year ago I ...
A. 17 November 2009: Both men and women frequently or sometimes masturbate. Which is normal. So . . . what's the problem? ... (read in full...)
I'm a virgin and desperate to have sex?
Q. i am a guy of 18yrs old am still a virgin and i have a girl-friend i keep telling her about sex but she ignores me and i need it desperately what can i do to have sex?...
A. 17 November 2009: If you are of legal age and all that desperate, then my only advice is to find a girl of legal age who will . . . ... (read in full...)
Guys only - circumcision advice needed!
Q. ok this is a strictly GUYS ONLY question, so please i suggest that girls, dont read this. i developed a urinary tract infection, so my doc said that it is best if i get a circumcision done, as it will prevent further infections.so th...
A. 17 November 2009: Circumcision was performed on me as a baby, so I do not quite qualify to answer your questions except to say that urinary tract infections are very rare to a circumcised male. For what it's worth, girls seem to prefer the look and good hygiene is ... (read in full...)
His penis smells of sex!!!
Q. i have been with my boyfriend for 7 months now, i love him so much and he always tells me he loves me... but on 2 occasions, i went down on him and his penis smelt like sex, now im paranoid hes been sleeping with another girl then coming back to me. ...
A. 17 November 2009: That can be a sign of sexual activity. If his area smelled of another woman, then you should be concerned, but if it is cum-smelling, he simply may be masturbating. ... (read in full...)
An unlucky guy looking to have sex, what do I do?
Q. Well, I'm 18 and I really want to have sex. "Saving it" for someone special stopped meaning something to me a bit ago, I just simply want to do it. I haven't had any luck with girls and the last girl I was seeing just flat out stopped speaking to ...
A. 16 November 2009: Dude, there are also lonely girls out there. If you are not the most handsome, no problem, but always do your best and be willing to consider the girls who are also not the hottest around. And go wherever they are. ... (read in full...)
How do I get the sexual hunger back in our relationship?
Q. I am worried about our sex life! B/f of 4 yrs.we've always had a good sexual relationship. Lately he's never in the mood. Has had to increase his blood pressure meds to get his BP under control, which he says affects his libido. But also I don't de...
A. 16 November 2009: Indeed, some medications, notably beta blockers like Atenolol, affect a man's sex life, but there are blood pressure medications that do not cause erectile dysfunction. ... (read in full...)
How do I silence my squelching fanny?
Q. when i am having sex with my bf my fanny makes a squelching noise. how can i stop this? help...
A. 16 November 2009: It is probably caused by air trapped in your vagina, not your fanny, unless fanny refers to something different across the pond. A variety of positions may help but the sounds are quite normal with sexual intercourse. ... (read in full...)
He said he wanted nothing to do with me. Did he just use me for sex?
Q. i really need help...i started talkin 2 diz amazing boy nd i started fallin in love wit him the only problems was dat we werent going together...we started having sex and everything was fine until i stayed at his house he started trying 2 make me ...
A. 16 November 2009: Duh, yes, you were used.... (read in full...)
I seem to be missing out in the orgasm department big time!
Q. I'm 24 in a stable relationship with a man who i am very much in love with and feel totally comfortable around him. i have been sexually active since i was sixteen and had my first orgasm at about 8. my problem is that i seem to be missing out in ...
A. 15 November 2009: Many women have never experienced orgasm much more than you describe, according to renown research and reality, but it is possible to achieve for most any woman. If you have never "felt the earth move with your man," perhaps he is inexperienced or ... (read in full...)
How can I maintain a healthy relationship?
Q. So me and my ex girlfriend have been together for 3 years now. We split up recently because our relationship went downhill, mainly because of me. At first, our relationship was perfect, about halfway, I started letting things that happened in my ...
A. 15 November 2009: We did not suggest that you "stay away completely." Nobody said that. You may be someone who overreacts to suggestions. Just cool it a bit, okay? ... (read in full...)
How can I maintain a healthy relationship?
Q. So me and my ex girlfriend have been together for 3 years now. We split up recently because our relationship went downhill, mainly because of me. At first, our relationship was perfect, about halfway, I started letting things that happened in my ...
A. 13 November 2009: Well, we are not there , don't know her or you. My advice is as stated. Stay as close as she will allow and never be pushy or even jealous. That will not be easy, but she is in charge now. ... (read in full...)
How can I maintain a healthy relationship?
Q. So me and my ex girlfriend have been together for 3 years now. We split up recently because our relationship went downhill, mainly because of me. At first, our relationship was perfect, about halfway, I started letting things that happened in my ...
A. 12 November 2009: Well, it seems that you have learned a great deal about life and relationships. For that, you are to be commended. But apparently, there are wounds that are difficult to heal. It has been said that time heals all wounds. It can, but time takes time. ... (read in full...)
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