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*oneypie

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Her depression is getting in the way of our love!

Q.   I've been with my girlfriend for 9 years, and we are both in love with each others. We shared alot of great times together and i can't imagine my life without her. I was her first boyfriend, and she never dated anyone because she doesn't trust men, ...

A.   16 July 2018: I think you should tell her she NEEDS to seek help. 9 years together is a long time and I would presume it also means you two know each other well and care for each other. But... I think she is stagnating in her own misery. Medication is... (read in full...)

Everyone tells us moving in together after 2 months of dating is too soon!

Q.   What's the consensus for knowing when you're ready to move in with someone? My boyfriend and I have only been dating for a little over 2 months, but we see each other every day (we work at the same company), spend hours/weekends at a time togeth...

A.   16 July 2018: It might work for you two, it might not. However WHERE is the fire? 2 months is really nothing. You don't know him all that well and he doesn't know you. Even if you have already spend a lot of time together, you are BOTH on your best behavi... (read in full...)

My best friend is dating my younger sister!

Q.   my best freind has started going out with my little sister (20) and im realy jelouse about it. some back story, me and my best freind we'll call him Tim, we're both 27 and have been mates for about 26 years. anyway about six months back my l...

A.   16 July 2018: OP, I know this is not what you want to hear but Tim doesn't feel romantic about you. He has known you long enough that IF HE DID he would have acted on it. YOU are a FRIEND with a capital F. No more, no less. He DOES however feel romanticall... (read in full...)

How do I move on and am I to blame?

Q.   I'm just in despair right now. I absolutely love this site and it's helped me in times of need for so long now, so here goes. I've recently broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years. We lived together for two years in his family house (his famil...

A.   16 July 2018: I'm sorry it didn't work out for you two. But it happens. I think you BOTH ignored "each other issues" in the beginning and thought you either would get used to them or it would change over time. But most of all, I think your (now) ex is just... (read in full...)

This confusing guy is sending mixed signals!

Q.   So I met this guy off a gay dating app. We had tremendously good sex. As he left my house he told me he "really wanted" to see me again. He lives in a different city and for a hook up from an app, it was brave of him to say that. I asked him when he ...

A.   15 July 2018: Also... OP, if you guy didn't use condom - go get a STD panel. Not because you two are gay but because he seems to be having a lot of partners. And there is a rise in STD's in the UK. Don't be a statistic. Meeting up before a hook up... well... (read in full...)

What does he want? Is there something here or just a sexual relationship?

Q.   Going back about 4-5 months ago, I met a guy one night out at a bar. We are 5 years age difference, I'm 22 and he's 27. We immediately slept together that night. We kind of clicked quite well and he got my number, stayed in contact with me and we ...

A.   15 July 2018: Why not ask him? If you would LIKE more, tell him. Then he can either AGREE and you two move forward or... he can reject the idea and you can stop wasting your time, energy and emotions on a guy who doesn't WANT to date you. As for how much... (read in full...)

Shall I stop being a gentlemen and be a man?

Q.   Just wondering what you guys would think what’s on this girls mind. She is married with 2 kids. She is few years older than me, we work together. She is quiet person, well respected and often hates guys advancing. For example a friend of mine will ...

A.   15 July 2018: Baby steps, OP You just broke up after being with someone for 6 years. Of course that hurts and makes you feel numb. Whether your ex was "right" on being worried about the finances doesn't matter right now. What matter is that you get back on ... (read in full...)

Why doesn’t he answer his phone when he’s with me?

Q.   I have been dating a guy for 5 wks we have had a great 5 wks (I know it's only 5 wks) but one thing that bugs me is when we are together he won't answer his phone if a message comes through and often put it on silent. . Why is this ?? He says he ...

A.   15 July 2018: I would honestly presume he is telling the truth. I think it's pretty RUDE to hang out with someone or be out to dinner and be busy on the phone. He is still on his best behavior when seeing you so putting the phone on silence seems polite t... (read in full...)

Shall I stop being a gentlemen and be a man?

Q.   Just wondering what you guys would think what’s on this girls mind. She is married with 2 kids. She is few years older than me, we work together. She is quiet person, well respected and often hates guys advancing. For example a friend of mine will ...

A.   15 July 2018: She is married, OP What in the world would you get out of this mess? Other than MAYBE some attention, fantasy and some affair? And I agree - define - gentleman and man... Kind of curious.... (read in full...)

In a financial crisis, who do you give your last dollar to?

Q.   At the age of 16 years old I knew I never wanted a man with a child. When I met my husband, he had no children which was a plus. Of course we started off as friends but before we actually got into a serious relationship, he slept with one of his ...

A.   13 July 2018: Your priority are YOUR children. What I would suggest you do, is make a budget and stick to it. Have savings for a rainy day. Rent-to-own (or out to hire) is such a bad way to buy items for you house as you usually end up paying many time... (read in full...)

After years of neglect, my teeth need dental care! Is this how I go about it?

Q.   Hi guys... I think this is more for support as well as advice. I've been on before about this topic but a new angle this time. So I've now got a boyfriend and one major issue I had was I hate my teeth. It's because of years of neglect ...

A.   13 July 2018: Just do it. Make sure you tell your dentist that you have neglected your dental care out of fear but that you want to improve. If your dentist spends time scolding you. Don't use that dentist again. The dentist will have seen worse. And if yo... (read in full...)

This confusing guy is sending mixed signals!

Q.   So I met this guy off a gay dating app. We had tremendously good sex. As he left my house he told me he "really wanted" to see me again. He lives in a different city and for a hook up from an app, it was brave of him to say that. I asked him when he ...

A.   13 July 2018: No, he doesn't have a real interest in you. Having occasionally casual sex perhaps but not really anything where he has to INVEST anything. Sending you a couple of minimal effort texts doesn't mean he is interested. Just that he wants you to b... (read in full...)

Is my way of orgasming normal? And was it normal to start so young?

Q.   When i was 8 years old, I've literally been having an orgasm and i didn't even knew what orgasm is. I would get it when ever i squeeze my legs together, and i would feel pleasure and relaxed feeling, i also feel pressure down there when i do it. ...

A.   12 July 2018: I don't know if it's normal for 8 year old's to orgasm. I DO think it sounds normal that you had no idea of what it was - just that it felt nice. Like some one scratching your back. Orgasm is just a bodily reaction. It is not ALWAYS sexual. ... (read in full...)

Why couldn’t he understand that I needed his emotional support that day?

Q.   Monday was a sad day for me. I lost my job and broke up with my boyfriend of 4 yrs. Although I'm not too worried about being able to find another job, it still is not a happy event to be let go... I called my boyfriend and he sounded shocked ...

A.   12 July 2018: Sorry about the job thing, OP I hope you find a MUCH better job next. As for your BF or rather ex-Bf - maybe... breaking up was for the best? in the long run? If he can't SUPPORT you and FIND an hour, sit down and TALK to you, when he otherwis... (read in full...)

Are we all THAT replaceable?

Q.   Dear friends, I hope you are all well! I would like to have your advice today on a sensitive situation I am facing. I broke up with my ex of 6 months. She was a beautiful girl and it is clear she has and had lots of success. For some rea...

A.   12 July 2018: In the basic sense of the word, yes we are replaceable. In relationship and in the workplace. However, that doesn't mean that you have no worth or that an ex who is seeing someone new, gets one who is of equal value to you. To your family and ... (read in full...)

Please help me with my questions on infertility..

Q.   This question is for anyone who has struggled with infertility. How was your relationship (marriage or otherwise) affected by it? Did you undergo fertility treatments (successful or otherwise), adopt, or just choose to remain child-free? Also, for ...

A.   11 July 2018: I think your "best bet" for getting the information you are seeking, to find a infertility forum/board. You will get a MUCH larger group of people who have gone through and going through this, than you will here on DC. ... (read in full...)

Advice on changing appearance and health please!

Q.   I really want to change myself , I don't mean drastically I just mean in terms of appearance and they way I am . I like my hair but ive always had the same hairstyle really and want ideas of what sort of hairstyle to get or how to just not overthink ...

A.   11 July 2018: People RARELY do it, but GO SEE your doctor and discuss HEALTHY weight-loss and fitness. You can also consult with your doctor and get a referral to a dietician. IF you actually need to lose weight. I would have my glucose levels checked. Eating "... (read in full...)

I overheard my wife saying that her ex was the best sex she'd ever had and now my ego is shattered!

Q.   So my ego has been devastated and I really don’t know how to handle this. Turns out I’m not the best sex my wife has ever had. Any advice is appreciated. About a week ago my wife had one of her friends at our house for some drinks. After ha...

A.   11 July 2018: I do understand that it wasn't a nice thing to hear. I absolutely get that. I think if she had overheard you saying that she wasn't as good in bed as your ex, she would feel hurt too. The thing is it wasn't the only thing she said and you ove... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is going away on vacation for two weeks!

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 8 months and we have an amazing relationship. In a few weeks he’s going away with his family to his family’s house in Europe for 2 weeks. I know this sounds pathetic, but I’m genuinely upset that he’s ...

A.   11 July 2018: Awww honey :) 2 weeks might seem like a LONG time but it really isn't. If you keep busy it will be over before you know it and you will BOTH have SO much to talk about when he gets back! Enjoy your little time away from each other, it's GOOD... (read in full...)

What would you do in my situation? Travel first or settle down now, travel in retirement?

Q.   I have been in a relationship with a man for a year. I'm pretty happy with this guy. We've had ups and downs, but overall things are good between us. We love each other. We have a holiday booked together and are planning to move in together. Howeve...

A.   10 July 2018: My parents (who did travel a lot with us in tow (me and my brother)) planned to travel more in their retirement. Then my mom feel ill. Even travelling the 10 hour car ride to see me, my husband and (at the time) first child was hard on her. It took ... (read in full...)

I'm married he's married why can't I just walk away?

Q.   I am married and have been with a married man for 4 and a half years. He has continually asked me to marry him, sent me houses online and tells me that we are ‘one’ and meant to be . I have asked him to leave and be with me and he says he is not ...

A.   9 July 2018: Why not look at your own actions, OP? Why have you not left YOUR husband yet? You obviously don't love your husband enough to be faithful, so why stay? As for why you can't stay away from this married man, well because you CHOSE not to. Yo... (read in full...)

Not sure I feel the same as my ex he wants to try again

Q.   An ex recently got back in touch with me after 7 months. He wanted to see me so i agreed and went to his . We talked about stuff and they way he was saying things and what he was saying is he wants to start again . When we were in a relationship ...

A.   9 July 2018: I agree with N91 and Cindy, Move on, wish him well and just DO NOT go there. To me it seems like dipping back in the shallow pool of exes is RARELY if ever a good idea. While he SAYS he understand the harsh words spoken when you two brok... (read in full...)

I think I'm a great catch so why don't more guys go after me?

Q.   I’m in my early 20’s and I’ve been single for a few months now, and I’m having a hard time figuring out why guys don’t really approach me when I go out nor message me. Even on dating apps like Tinder, I don’t have as many guys as I’d like try to ...

A.   9 July 2018: Are you just looking for hook ups or something more substantial? As for "not having as many guys as I like" messaging you first.. It happens, even to attractive people. You are but ONE out of many. Having MANY guys "lust" after you or int... (read in full...)

Why do I have a strong gut feeling that there's something going on between my boyfriend and his ex?

Q.   During the first 2 years of being with my BF, he was still in touch with his ex stringing her along, not telling her that he was in a relationship with me. When I found out how he lied about not being in contact with her, I was very upset. Since ...

A.   7 July 2018: Well, I don't think you can make any presumptions or accusations without any proof. It makes you seem like an insecure nut. EVEN if you have HISTORY with him being shady in the past. The thing is YOU chose to stay with a guy who for 2 (TWO!!... (read in full...)

My ex treats his present girlfriend so much better than he ever treated me!

Q.   I dated a guy on and off for 3 years. I’m pretty sure he is a Narcissist by everything I’ve read and researched. I’m really trying to get over him and move on. I’m really hurt by how he is treating his new girlfriend. It’s seems like she is ...

A.   7 July 2018: Why cares, OP? He is your ex and you really should stop stalking his Facebook. It only rubs salt in your wound and you won't move forward when you are so busy "analyzing" and stalking your ex. He didn't treat you right and it ended so you NEE... (read in full...)

Sex hurts!!

Q.   Okay so I started dating this guy a while back and recently we decided to have sex. The first time it was bad, it didn't want to go in, when it went in it didn't go in all the way and it hurt really bad and I ended up bleeding. So we waited a while ...

A.   7 July 2018: Go get a Gyno check up, OP It can be your friend is right that you are not aroused enough, thus not wet enough for him to enter easily. Or you are tensing up so much that it hurts when trying to have sex. Or you are having an infection "below... (read in full...)

My annoying girlfriend makes me want to bang my head against the wall!

Q.   My girlfriend frustrates me, I have been working hard all week, I haven’t even bothered trying to be close to her as when she sees me she remembers to take me to get replacement fan, than it’s food shopping, than it’s some other chore. This week...

A.   7 July 2018: The whole world isn't having fun - just look at the news. I understand that losing your job is a BIG deal for you, it's SCARY! but that doesn't mean yon can take it out on your GF. I think she WAS trying to cheer you up with random things li... (read in full...)

My ex is poisoning my children against me and interfering in my visitation with them!

Q.   Just a quick question about my ex and my children. I had to take my ex to court in order to see my children. I have a good arrangement now and I love having my children. However I always set up really good weekends when I have them, prope...

A.   6 July 2018: Definitely, look into a mediator (court appointed) maybe what you need is to re-hash the visitation arrangement. It does (from what you write) sound like she does this to create drama and lash out at you. Why she does it is. however, irreleva... (read in full...)

He’s ignoring me all of a sudden! How do I react?

Q.   I’m 27 from UK and recently reconnected with my ex from 7 years ago who I broke up with. We had an amazing couple of days together rekindling and we’ve been very romantic since. Awkward part - he lives in America right now for work. He has men...

A.   6 July 2018: I agree with Code Warrior. There is a lot of confusion going on here. Because it seems like you think a "first" date with someone is a big step when normally it's not. I would have though spending a couple of "amazing" days being romantic was a mu... (read in full...)

Why won't my boyfriend tell people about me ?

Q.   My boyfriend won't take me around the people he plays sports with or tell his co workers or family about me. What should I do ? I asked him why he won't tell anyone about me or take me to a soccer game that he plays in coed soccer leauge because I ...

A.   6 July 2018: I think it's sad that he rather quit a sport than deal with introducing you. And I think you are being pushy. And not in a good way. Now while I feel 6-7 months is a good time to introduce someone to friends and family, for me at least, it sho... (read in full...)

Online dating isn't working for me

Q.   I have a question regarding online dating. Why is it that I am getting stood up so much? I have been on a few dating apps for 6 months and have only successfully been on one date. I find a common pattern when I get a conversation started. I get her ...

A.   6 July 2018: Maybe they go through the dating experience differently than you. It can be the women that you DO get a date with decides whether they can see a future with you on the first date, or not. And if they don't... they move on asap to not waste th... (read in full...)

I'm wasting the prime of my life. What should I do?

Q.   Hello all, I've been in a rut for 8 years now and can't shift it. I'm alive but not living I guess. I have no drive or ambition. I can't remember the last time I thought yes I really wanna do this. Problem is I don't know what I want nothing ...

A.   6 July 2018: Start with a full physical, OP The GF can wait. Get the physical, get your hormonal levels checked (this goes for men as well as women). The start working out. I'm not saying TRY to become Arnold Schwarzenegger or that you MUST have a 5 p... (read in full...)

My ex is poisoning my children against me and interfering in my visitation with them!

Q.   Just a quick question about my ex and my children. I had to take my ex to court in order to see my children. I have a good arrangement now and I love having my children. However I always set up really good weekends when I have them, prope...

A.   6 July 2018: I would seek legal advice here, OP This is not OK. While you CAN NOT control what she does and says, you CAN control whether you GET your time with the kids or not. It does mean you might have to take her to court. Or find a mediator to sort... (read in full...)

She only wants to be friends but acts like we are more?

Q.   This is a complicated issue that has really affected me mentally. I've been friends with this girl since secondary school and we have always been pretty close, we got closer as we moved up to college and since becoming close friends and spen...

A.   6 July 2018: Since all she ever want is friendship you HAVE to accept that or cut the contact. I think she really is not "getting it" or she is a little dense in her actions. YOU see everything she does as slightly romantic - the touching and closenes... (read in full...)

My husband is super clingy!

Q.   Hello I have been married for 27 years. In those years I have left my husband twice. My husband is super clingy. If I enter a room in the house, he is behind me. If I want to take a bath, he comes into the washroom to talk. I don't seem t...

A.   5 July 2018: Put him to work. If he comes in the kitchen and tries to tell you what to do, step back and tell him - go ahead cook the meal. Or ask him to set the table, take out the trash, make a salad... something. Idle hand, OP My husband did the sa... (read in full...)

I need to get time off but how should I go about it?

Q.   (Not a relationship question, but I need some advice on a work issue.) Ok here goes. I’ve been at this company (hospital) for 10 months now. I work night shift, have rotating weekends, and work most-if not all- holidays. The job itself is good, I ...

A.   5 July 2018: Your paid time off should be in your contract. In many places you do not get paid time until you have been there 6-12 months (depending on country and place you work) - but all that SHOULD be in your contract. If you need time off, put in the pape... (read in full...)

I'm 8 weeks pregnant and questioning my relationship with my partner because I just found out that he's slept with numerous prostitutes before we met.

Q.   Hello. I am 8 weeks pregnant , was so happy with everything and looking forward to the future but now I’m seriously re thinking the whole thing. I have been with my partner a while and we were just discussing the blood tests I am getting for...

A.   5 July 2018:  Yes, you can vaccinate against hepatitis A and B ( I believe it is) but there are hepatitis C - D and E that you can not, so he can still have hepatitis. Just saying. The UK is in the TOP 5! when it comes to STD's like HPV - Chlamydia, hepa... (read in full...)

Is it ok to fall in love with your cousin?

Q.   My whole family went to Minnesota to visit my aunt and cousins! My cousin is a boy, 16 Years old and I’m 15 Years old and a girl. When I first saw him it was like love at first sight....sometimes he would roll his tounge at me just to be funny or...

A.   4 July 2018: Ahhh OP, It's not love. It's a crush or infatuation, nothing more. Don't tell him, that will just make everything awkward. I'ts OK that you like him as a person but be realistic here, this isn't going to go any where. A relationship yo... (read in full...)

Am I overthinking his binge drinking?

Q.   I'm the kind of girl who likes the occasional night out to celebrate something. However my boyfriend is a party animal and it seems he would binge drink into the early hours quite often. Does this say something about his personality/values or am I ...

A.   4 July 2018: Do you WANT to date an alcoholic? Someone who seems to lack control when it comes to drinking? How often is "quite often" ? How bad is "binge drinking"? Personally, I would find anyone who drinks (or do drugs) in excess someone not com... (read in full...)

Should I move away and start a new life close to my daughter?

Q.   I split up with a long term ex (17 years) because he treated me so badly that it ruined my self esteem and this impacted on my career and relationship with my daughter. I realise now I put up with his behaviour because I grew up in a dysfunctional ...

A.   4 July 2018: I think you should move closer to your daughter and away from this guy. THERE is no point in holding onto him or the past. I would also URGE you to see a therapist (once you move) and work on yourself. If you stay 17 years in this crappy rela... (read in full...)

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