How do I become ok with just one man who is good to me? How do I go about finding one?
Q. Me again with another question. I have become friends with a married man. We met online and he did not say he was married until after we met and realized we were attracted to each other. We have had a relationship for over a year now. Some sex, m...
A. 11 March 2011: Oh WOW! Thanks for the amazing advice! I so appreciate hearing it and knowing that I am selling myself short. I want to be self-empowered. I know I can get there by being on this site and seeing what others have to say.
THANK YOU THANK YOU ... (read in full...)
I never meant to hurt her, she left but I want her back!
Q. dear cupid. I will be as honest as possible . I met a girl online. We started chatting everyday. Soon afterwards, we exchanged numbers and we immediately began making voice calls. We decided to hook up for coffee . The first time I lay my eyes ont...
A. 13 December 2010: What were you two fighting about if you seemed so happy. Fighting so fiercely that you LEFT her and after the next argument SHE left you at the club?
Do you have mutual friends who are mostly singles or couples?
Good luck - I agree - but I wo... (read in full...)
Surely you wouldn't carry on sleeping with an ex if you didn't still love them?
Q. Ok here goes..... ready to be confused..... I was with a guy for just over 6 years, he ended the relationship just over a year ago as he said he didnt love me anymore, But a year on where still doing things a normal couple would do, we go to the...
A. 13 December 2010: Yes, men will do whatever you will allow them to. AND he is enjoying you both. Time to move on and tell him he doesnt even make a good friend now.
I know I have been there - wasted time on a man who is now seeing someone else and cheating on her a... (read in full...)
Why are the worst men attracted to me?
Q. ok so i have started to notice this trend lately that has been happening ? iv noticed that the worst men are attracted to me like im not being rude but im talking drug dealers and drug addicts themselves, the are really attracted to me an upfront ...
A. 13 December 2010: Babsbunny69 I think you hit it right on! I had a BF like that and now I see what the attraction to each other was...Of course I finally got out of it cause I couldnt stand how he treated me and others. So self-centered, a real weasel - men like that ... (read in full...)
Can anyone explain my bad luck with attracting women?
Q. Hi there, just wandering where i'm going wrong trying to attract the opposite sex. Its all been going wrong in so many ways pretty much all through my life online dating -Tried this and the girls seem sooo picky on there, even the average look...
A. 13 December 2010: U are trying too hard and looking in the wrong places. When you are happy with just being with you or being in the moment with helping others or with friends, U will instantly look confident and attractive.
Don't waste another minute on those on... (read in full...)
My bf's wandering eye, flirting, and internet cheating.
Q. dear cupid...im a female in a monoginus relationhip with my boyfriend..most things we have in common that make it so wonderful are, our health and keep our selves becoming over weight, our kids, our physical, our wonderful sexual relationship, our ...
A. 26 October 2010: I think you should check into more info about what he does. Is he on any dating sites online?
I had a man who was similar to all you have said, but yes, then I found out the kind of sites he was going on - I didnt mind the porn but the dating s... (read in full...)
I'm desperate and want to run away from my husband, please advise!
Q. I'm an indian.I got married in 2007(traditionally arranged marriage).my hubby and me never got along well rite from the beginning.I grew up as an independent girl, did all my work myself since 12 old(I've no mother, my dad's got a family of his ...
A. 21 August 2010: I am sorry that you are going thru this but I feel it is almost impossible that he will change. Look at this also, your own family thinks that it is unacceptable to b away from him.
If for some reason the husband can force you back to him legally ... (read in full...)
Am I being too uptight about this?
Q. I need some advice. My husbands parents go to these bike rallies where all the women walk around completely naked and you can see ppl getting blow jobs and having sex and stuff. Anything you can think of goes on at this place. Well they keep asking ...
A. 20 August 2010: I would be concerned as to why his parents didnt invite you too? I dont think that he should go without you and that you should have blind trust - no that sounds like and invite waiting to happen AND his parents may not be watching him - they may ... (read in full...)
Help! First date in two years... but is he already playing games with me?
Q. I met someone last weekend and he asked me out on a date via text on Monday past, i agreed and when he asked me how old i was and i responded (we are both in our 30's) also asking him when will i get to talk to him because i prefer that (especially ...
A. 20 August 2010: I wouldnt even bother to pick up the phone if he does call about the date - I would just txt back to him and say that you are not interested - sorry.
There is no excuse for anyone of any age to have this type of behavior if they want to get to k... (read in full...)
Break off the engagement?
Q. I have been engaged for about 9 months now n decided to postpone the wedding for another year. Now I am not sure if I even want to marry him, here's why: I had a long term relationship of 5 yrs that I ended bc it was somewhat emotionally abusive. He ...
A. 20 August 2010: Oh Sweetie - read back what you wrote out loud to yourself and the answer will be obvious.
Even the last sentence says it all - And I still think of my X constantly! But dont head back to him!
There is some time frame to re-adjust after ... (read in full...)
Is she avoiding sex just to get gifts?
Q. Hi Girls, I am with my girlfriend for the last few weeks and we have known each other for the last 6months. I am doing evry thing I can to woo her even at this point by giving her expensive gifts, flowers every week, expensive dinners etc.. T...
A. 20 August 2010: I DID tell you what to do - RUN RUN from this woman! There is nothing to fix - it doesnt matter what your sexual tastes were in the past - she is pulling some nasty stuff on you -
And Rough sex can be from day one or whenever - its what the two ... (read in full...)
Pregnant preteen
Q. Okay I'm 13 turning 14 in 6 mos anyway I have been dating since I'm 11. I only had sex 9 times. 7 times were with boys my age and the other times were with girls. Anyway I just found out I'm pregnant and further along then I thought how should I ...
A. 19 August 2010: If you are only 13 why does your post say that you are 30-35?
Anyway, consider your options, talk to your parents, you may want to do adoption, maybe even within extended family.
Not to judge but did you ever consider the consequences of ... (read in full...)
Married and need to feel the connection again
Q. I need some guidance, I've always considered myself a self sorter/independant/get on with it kind of girl but my current sitation has left me flumaxed! Im late 30s and been in a relationship with my husband for 15 years..married for 5 years...2 ...
A. 18 August 2010: There is a book out there called The 7 Stages of Marriage. Maybe what you are going thru - I don't know I divorced my hubby over other issues - but you may want to look for the book and see what is listed in there - you may find where you are right ... (read in full...)
I booked a 3-month trip to Jamaica while I was single. Now I'm in a relationship and I need advice. Help!
Q. I'll try to keep this short. Basically, thanks to America's lovely financial aid system loopholes I was able to spend my spring '10 semester--my 2nd semester of college--in Africa at no cost to me. In fact, I came back with $1500 more than what I ...
A. 18 August 2010: I don't know how long you have been seeing him but I think it is best you let him know now that you plan to go to Jamaica.
Talk it over and see where it goes - you may both decide to end it now - or wait then be 'apart' doing your own things. ... (read in full...)
My married man doesn't want to go on holiday together now!
Q. I have been together with a married man for over 4yrs.We have bad and good times.People have told his wife and always problems but then it sorts out.I love him very very very much.We were to go on holidays but people have again made problems for us ...
A. 15 August 2010: Are you serious? Why would you be with a married man for four years if he didnt leave his wife to commit to you so then he could cheat on you?
And wow! 'People' are making problems for the two of you and have told his wife? What does she possible... (read in full...)
She gave him a hand job but said it wasn't cheating
Q. I have been married for eight years now, recently my wife found this guy at work, she felt sorry for him, so she moves him into our apartment, so he can heal from an operation on his shoulder. Well let me back up, before he moved in he was stay...
A. 15 August 2010: This is CHEATING! And now she has moved him into your apartment?
Do you and your wife have sex? Are things ok with your relationship?
Do you find this upsetting to you or are you willing to share her? I mean I guess there are some couples who... (read in full...)
I get the feeling he doesn't love me
Q. ok..this guy say s that he loves me..like really crazy about me..but i dont understand..he never does nething to make me feel tht he likes me other than saying so... He goes on calling me on the phone non-stop..with out really being concerne...
A. 15 August 2010: I dont think this guy loves you or likes you - I think he loves himself only!
Read what your wrote out loud to yourself. He doesnt respect your time he makes calls all the time, he says he loves you like crazy but does not show it in ANY way.
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says its normal for men to cheat
Q. I always caught my boyfriend of 7 years cheating on me. I think he cheated on me 6 times or more. We already have a baby and I thought that he would change. Every time he is caught cheating he always says sorry and promises that he won't do it ...
A. 15 August 2010: If you dont't have trust you don't have anything. There is NOTHING for you to fix up. Seems he is the one who is BROKEN. He may have an addiction to attention or some problem with commitment or intimacy ( sharing his feelings )
Either way - you de... (read in full...)
Some tips for entertaining a married older man
Q. I'm 18, and have been seeing a 42 year old man. He is married with kids. It all started when I spent the whole night working with him on his truck that broke down. He's a mechanic witch is what I would like to be when I'm finnished highschool. A...
A. 15 August 2010: What to do and not do with a much older married man? DO NOTHING with him!
The fact that he is interested and touching you has NOTHING to do with what he is getting at home. He will get what he can when he can get it. You are young and naive an... (read in full...)
My wife is very abusive towards me - please help.
Q. [OP original title] Someone please give me some advice... I have been living in an abusive relationship for nearly 15 months. I am not sure where to start because so much has happened during this time. But at the same time I am not sure how to s...
A. 15 August 2010: Pack your things and GET OUT of the house - Do not let her know where you are. Tell your work she is not to contact you there. Watch your back while going to and returning to your safe place.
Get an attorney and get things started for a divorce.... (read in full...)
Realised my bf has lost interest in me after our holiday together
Q. [OP original title] I've just returned from my second holiday with my bf of 4 yrs. this might not seem as important to u guys but it kinda started bothering me that we weren't having sex all the time. The thing is, at home before we went, he woul...
A. 15 August 2010: The fact that you initiated all that at holiday not just the sex - which I am sure was a good start but then YOU realized you wanted intimacy!
Yeh, I went thru that with my bf of 4yrs - guess what? We are not together anymore! When we had gone... (read in full...)
Is she avoiding sex just to get gifts?
Q. Hi Girls, I am with my girlfriend for the last few weeks and we have known each other for the last 6months. I am doing evry thing I can to woo her even at this point by giving her expensive gifts, flowers every week, expensive dinners etc.. T...
A. 15 August 2010: Wait! I just read your follow-up and you said you have had sex with her and now she is playing with her boobs and teasing you?
Wtf? Run Run from this woman - Its bad enough to take you for your gifts if she is not interested - but she HAS had sex ... (read in full...)
Is she avoiding sex just to get gifts?
Q. Hi Girls, I am with my girlfriend for the last few weeks and we have known each other for the last 6months. I am doing evry thing I can to woo her even at this point by giving her expensive gifts, flowers every week, expensive dinners etc.. T...
A. 14 August 2010: Are you sure she is your GIRLFRIEND? A girlfriend would want to kiss you and sit next to you gift or not. I dont think this gal cares about you at all other than the gifts she is getting - and even at that - she is not a very nice person to only ... (read in full...)
Does my g/f have a borderline personality disorder?
Q. Dose my girlfriend have borderline personality disorder . Here are some of the reasons I'm asking. Getting remarried to the same man twice, being married 4 times, having two children with two different people, spending them selves into large debt,...
A. 14 August 2010: Do you know what BDP is? Has she been to a psychiatrist? From what I have read of the symptoms some seem to make sense - but it is a complicated issue. Could be many other things causing her behavior.
U are concerned about a 'label' for her beha... (read in full...)
She's on her 3rd boyfriend but I want her!
Q. I go around saying that the only thing worse than failure is regret. Now I regret messing up. I did't realize how much I liked this girl, now she is on her 3rd boyfriend and its killing me. I have to do something to get this under control. I ...
A. 14 August 2010: What did you do to 'mess' up? How long were you together? How long have you been apart? Does she have any contact with you now? Need more info to give an opinion. Thanks... (read in full...)
Fiance broke things off. Cold feet?
Q. Me and my fiance had been together for nearly 4 years. 2 weeks ago she asked for a break, then 7 days later broke up with me. No sign of loveloss from her though. There was no discussion about our relationship and no real problems before this, ...
A. 14 August 2010: How long had you been seeing each other before you became engaged? And had you started making plans for the wedding and set a date or were you 'drifting' along?
The relationship may have lost momentum and she may have really started to question... (read in full...)
His stubborn streak
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months. We do not live together. Just last week, he did something that would potentially irritate my neighbors. I like being considerate to my neighbors so I asked him to stop what he was doing and he got ...
A. 14 August 2010: He is INCONSIDERATE - there ya go - the salt thing sounds petty but it isnt! And see he treats others like that too.
If it is bothering you now - think how much worse it will get when he sees you are accepting it!
Good luck - but I say RUN - ... (read in full...)
I'm ready to throw in the towel. Should I leave?
Q. I'm ready to throw in the towel. Should I leave? Our house is in foreclosure for the 2nd time. Our Gas (hot water) was disconnected for the 3rd time. Not to mention the other times that our water, trash, electric, phone and cable services have bee...
A. 13 August 2010: Get the hell out of there with your kids! This man has no respect or love for you or them!
You will probably get more for a short time on social services to get things evened out!
Please get some help at your local women's shelter. They ha... (read in full...)
Huusband cheated on me with 2 women from a dating site..should I tell his parents?
Q. A year ago I discovered my husband of 10 years had been joining internet dating sites and has in fact had sex with at least 2 of the women he met on these sites. I have been to marriage counselling and on anti-depressants and trying my best t...
A. 13 August 2010: More info please. Do you have children together? Is he in marriage counseling also with you? Do you each see individual therapists? What do you hope to gain by telling his parents if they have shown that they are aware of him being 'naughty' but ... (read in full...)
Live in partner has been looking at porn!
Q. The other day I was going into my history because I was searching for a holiday and forgot the website I found one on. My partner and I share the laptop and while I was in the history I was shocked and disgusted to see a free pornographic website ...
A. 13 August 2010: I dont think there is anything bad about looking at porn and maybe you should let him know you came across it and actually you may want to try some of it with him - whatever is in your realm of course.
When it gets sad and dangerous and really s... (read in full...)
His stubborn streak
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months. We do not live together. Just last week, he did something that would potentially irritate my neighbors. I like being considerate to my neighbors so I asked him to stop what he was doing and he got ...
A. 13 August 2010: This is a big red flag! Not only does he not respect the neighborhood but you are right - he does not respect you!
Pretty serious issue I would say. In fact a deal-breaker for me.
How does he treat people when you are out together? Waiter... (read in full...)
In love with a married man. Know it's wrong but don't know what to do?
Q. Oh help me! I met a man online in January. We hit it off right away. We can talk easily, we laugh, etc... A couple of weeks into it I guessed he was married. He said he couldnt lie and that he was - unhappily. He tells me they only have sex on...
A. 13 August 2010: Wow! Thanks for even more Hard Core advice! I needed to see and read it and I know I deserve better and that it has to end now.
I generally trust most people but I am beginning to see men really do lie to get what they want - attention or sex.
... (read in full...)
In love with a married man. Know it's wrong but don't know what to do?
Q. Oh help me! I met a man online in January. We hit it off right away. We can talk easily, we laugh, etc... A couple of weeks into it I guessed he was married. He said he couldnt lie and that he was - unhappily. He tells me they only have sex on...
A. 11 August 2010: Ok he says he can never afford to be divorced. And that he is trying to resist temptation from me. He is the one who had advertised himself as single on the internet! He did apologize for that but now - I am already hurt.
So where to meet intellig... (read in full...)
In love with a married man. Know it's wrong but don't know what to do?
Q. Oh help me! I met a man online in January. We hit it off right away. We can talk easily, we laugh, etc... A couple of weeks into it I guessed he was married. He said he couldnt lie and that he was - unhappily. He tells me they only have sex on...
A. 11 August 2010: Thanks for the advice so far. Let me add she will not go to counseling with him and relegates him to the spare room because she says he snores. Much more going on than just no sex between them.
Yes I know it is for them to work out. You all gave... (read in full...)
Is he thinking about marriage or is he just all talk?
Q. I am just writing because I am somewhat confused by my boyfriend's behavior lately. Things seem to be going well for us - his family and friends love me and seem to think I'm a keeper, and I think he is too. We were at a mutual friend's wedding ...
A. 10 August 2010: I gotta second what OhGetReal said - Keep your options open - even wanting you to move in soon is a red flag. Just like the comment "We are not even married yet, and you do what I say" Yikes! RED FLAG there - kidding or not.
Be sure to balance ... (read in full...)
Is he thinking about marriage or is he just all talk?
Q. I am just writing because I am somewhat confused by my boyfriend's behavior lately. Things seem to be going well for us - his family and friends love me and seem to think I'm a keeper, and I think he is too. We were at a mutual friend's wedding ...
A. 10 August 2010: I gotta second what OhGetReal said - Keep your options open - even wanting you to move in soon is a red flag. Just like the comment "We are not even married yet, and you do what I say" Yikes! RED FLAG there - kidding or not.
Be sure to balance ... (read in full...)
Is he thinking about marriage or is he just all talk?
Q. I am just writing because I am somewhat confused by my boyfriend's behavior lately. Things seem to be going well for us - his family and friends love me and seem to think I'm a keeper, and I think he is too. We were at a mutual friend's wedding ...
A. 9 August 2010: Be very careful with your heart in this one. I was dating a guy for four years and all the same wonderful things were happening and said - THEN I found out he was on some NASTY web sites and was probably meeting gals on there - He is a truck driver ... (read in full...)
Married and need to feel the connection again
Q. I need some guidance, I've always considered myself a self sorter/independant/get on with it kind of girl but my current sitation has left me flumaxed! Im late 30s and been in a relationship with my husband for 15 years..married for 5 years...2 ...
A. 9 August 2010: If you don't talk and try to work this out - believe me there are plenty of women out there that are gonna see this in him and initiate contact! Co-worker, friend, etc...
Please realize what you have is so special - you can re-create that spark!
... (read in full...)
My wifes was not a virgin how do I get even?
Q. hai, ok my wifes sexual past haunts me. Married 6 years and i am recently just finding out about her.i was a virgin when i married her and when we talked during our dating years she implied that she was pure. I came acros her diary and yes sorry i ...
A. 25 July 2010: You spent time for assaulting a female and now you want to GET EVEN with the wife? You know what? Please get a divorce and leave her be - before you blow up and hurt her out of repressed rage.
That, or get some serious counseling. This is not a li... (read in full...)
My wife slept with my best friend on our annniversary!
Q. my wife slept with my bestfriend, on our 10th year anniversary. We have being married 13 years. She just told me after i found an email from my bestfriend asking her if they could have sex again. I asked her about it and she told me i was not paying ...
A. 24 July 2010: If you dont want it to happen again you better adjust your priorities - Who says the family wants what YOU didnt have growing up? Maybe they just want YOU to be with them more.
There is nothing sadder than to see a woman wither or lay in the arms... (read in full...)
My wife slept with my best friend on our annniversary!
Q. my wife slept with my bestfriend, on our 10th year anniversary. We have being married 13 years. She just told me after i found an email from my bestfriend asking her if they could have sex again. I asked her about it and she told me i was not paying ...
A. 24 July 2010: If you dont want it to happen again you better adjust your priorities - Who says the family wants what YOU didnt have growing up? Maybe they just want YOU to be with them more.
There is nothing sadder than to see a woman wither or lay in the arms... (read in full...)
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