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*anniepeg agony aunt

*anniepeg

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*anniepeg's profile:

I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.

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Am I just in love with the idea of being loved?

Q.   Has anyOdy else experience what I am experiencing now? Although She is an attractive woman I have never had any feelings for her in the past. By accident I found out that she finds me physically attractive. I never realised that fancied my type. ...

A.   15 August 2018: I can talk from the other side as a woman because me and some guy have been having mutual crushes. He is not someone I would consider attractive at first, but I always notice him staring at me. It was his serious work ethic that turned me on. Then ... (read in full...)

I'm already cheating on my new boyfriend with an old FWB. How do I stop?

Q.   Hey everyone. I'm about to admit to something bad so please don't be too harsh with me here. I have recently got into a new relationship with a man my age. We have been together for just over a month and were dating for about a month before that. I ...

A.   15 August 2018: Your new boyfriend is the same age so that implies the fwbs and you have an age gap. Those nasty greasy old farts, right? Preying on young girls and can't maintain relationships with women their same age. Mid life crisis, whatever. You may thin... (read in full...)

How do I not get too attached to the new guy I'm seeing?

Q.   How do I not get too attached to the new guy I'm seeing? We like all the same things to a spooky degree and we have a lot of chemistry. The only thing is his ex might be pregnant and she won't go to the drs because she is religious. Which I don't ...

A.   15 August 2018: The fact that he could go back to her means he's not ready for any new relationship. People stay in abusive relationships for their own reasons. He can use the abuse as reasons to leave her but also use the baby as reason to stay with her. They have ... (read in full...)

How do I handle my girlfriend's ex without punching him in the face?

Q.   Hey people, I never usually ask questions like this online but I don't really know how to talk to anyone else about this. So sorry if this is all over the place. Anyway, I have been in a relationship with an amazing girl for the last 8 months an...

A.   8 August 2018: She is not all weak and needing protection. She has a choice to cut off friendships and build new ones with you. If her ex gets you to punch him, he wins while you make an embarrassment out of yourself. She blocked him on social media, then agre... (read in full...)

I'm dating someone who says he is speaking to others. How do I take that?

Q.   Dear Cupid readers I have went a date with someone recently, he said that's he's speaking to other woman. How do I take this? ...

A.   8 August 2018: It is distasteful because he has no reasons for telling you this. What he does in his private time is his own business, up until you two decide to be official. I would take that he's only telling you this to appear that he has options, so he is not ... (read in full...)

I told my touchy-feely autistic friend that I’m in love with him!

Q.   He is autistic, he is very touchy feely with me, but when he asked me if I was attracted to him I said yes, he said he has a girlfriend. I know who his gf is. I am in love with him and I said this to gim- after I said this he invited me out t...

A.   3 August 2018: Autistic people still cheat. They are not immune to outside temptations. He is inviting you on a date. Don't pretend to go out with him as a friend because you know what this is leading to. You should get away from him because he is using you as a ... (read in full...)

I don’t like defending my online friend to my boyfriend!

Q.   Hi everyone, This is kind of a weird situation. I have this online friend, who I've been talking to for about 13 years now. We have never met but I talk to him almost everyday. I consider him one of my best friends. We are very close and t...

A.   3 August 2018: As long as your friend is not taking too much time away from your relationship, I don't see the problem. Sorry I don't like your friend either because I don't believe in open relationships. Doesn't matter what your sexual orientation is. It doesn't ... (read in full...)

My wife is 35 but needs to grow up. I don't know how to get through to her

Q.   So my wife and I have been married 8 years. I love my wife and we have a 4 year old together. Currently we are trying to buy a home. Most things are pretty good. She is someone who craves people to talk to and she gets that with a few friends from ...

A.   31 July 2018: If she does not have a crush on her friend's husband, it could mean she is having so much fun with them she otherwise wouldn't have if she stayed home with you and her daughter. Even if she came home at 5, she still has to make time with you and ... (read in full...)

Girlfriend & I had our first real argument. She doesn't want to let it go. How do I approach this?

Q.   Hi Guys, I’ll keep this as short as possible. Basically had a bit of a disagreement with my GF of almost a year yesterday. We went to a supermarket to grab some things and she asked if we should swing by a McDonald’s on the way back. I sa...

A.   31 July 2018: I am the most soft spoken person ever, and I find a lot of people to be irritating. I find it's impossible to change people, so have to convince myself that it's the way they talk, and they mean no harm. You have been with her for a year. Was that... (read in full...)

Not sure what to do as I am in a long term relationship but developed feelings for another!

Q.   Hey Dear Cupid, I am confused and conflicted. I am in a long term relationship and have developed feelings for a work colleague. This is my first crush in a long time and this colleague is definitely my type, introverted, intelligent and ...

A.   29 July 2018: I think you have outgrown your relationship, or you just don't believe in long term relationships. People who are committed to the right person would not entertain thoughts of other people. They would be able to act professional and courteous at ... (read in full...)

I had sex with my best friend now I want to be his girlfriend!

Q.   So I have been best friends with an American man for about 12.5 years now, we met online and started as penpals , we have emailed nearly every day for 12 years and always ring each other and there for each other if we were going through a tough ...

A.   29 July 2018: All this would be cleared up if you just talk about practical things like one of you moving to US or Ireland, permanently, not just as long as it's still romantic. People who conduct long distance relationships are in it for the thrill because they ... (read in full...)

My relationship was perfect for 4 years, now its constant drama? I blame TV. What should I do?

Q.   I feel like Im a very simple creature. I just want sex, food, affection, and some nice things said to me every once in a while. My gf, she's more complicated. I literally don't know what she wants. One moment she's happy, the next she's sad, and ...

A.   29 July 2018: You should break up with her. If you broke up with her when everything was perfect, there will be more reasons to break up or to divorce when you got married. I don't think even a marriage certificate would mend her broken heart. She is on a mission ... (read in full...)

Are cheaters ever unhappy? They seem to be winning it all...a wife at home and a mistress outside!

Q.   Are cheaters ever unhappy? I work in the entertainment industry and work long hours - lately my video editor and I have been working on an editing project and during lunch hours he basically confided that he has had an External affair with another ...

A.   28 July 2018: This material based world is created so that the ones who exploit others win, on the outside. While innocent people suffer. Spiritual fulfillment does not depend on financial success or how many lovers you have. If you believe in heaven and hell, ... (read in full...)

I feel the need to have a child but I want it to be my lover's not my husband's

Q.   DO NOT JUDGE I am female, 34 years..i am married to a man-boy kinda of husband (45 years) who has no clue how to raise children..we have two..one mine and the first one is his...his past time is drinking....but he come through with finances......

A.   27 July 2018: It feels like you want to have another child with another man to spite your husband, for dumping responsibility on you while he goes drinking. So it makes no sense to take care of another when you have this resentment you are feeling. It's true that ... (read in full...)

We've been online dating for 9 months and he just now knows I'm a virgin. Is he upset to not know sooner?

Q.   i have been dating this man for 9 months online. he has recently, within the last week, been so shocked to hear that i am a virgin. i sense that he is angry at me for revealing this piece of info now- not months ago. lack of trust maybe i d...

A.   27 July 2018: He's not upset in the sense that you did something wrong or withheld important information. He's guilty that he led you on because being a virgin means you are saving it for someone special, because it's something real and substantial. Now he has to ... (read in full...)

What does it mean when a guy tilts his head while he's smiling you?

Q.   My guy friend and I were sitting together in a room by ourselves and we were facing each other. After he was done talking to me, we both became silent and stared into each other's eyes. He was staring at me for about 10 seconds and I was starting to ...

A.   25 July 2018: In your case, he has a girlfriend and it's inappropriate for him to stare at you, or at another girl for 10 seconds. For some men who are not able to devote to a relationship, being tied to one person is a sacrifice for not being able to get on with ... (read in full...)

I'm too shy to tell my boyfriend that some dominant sex acts are painful to me

Q.   My boyfriend have always been into dominant sex. Recently, he was asking me to slap him during sex, i found it really odd but i did anyways. We do love each other, however, his dominance in bed is sometimes painful. Im too shy to tell him to calm ...

A.   25 July 2018: Pleasure and pain release powerful chemicals in the brain. Some people associate pain with love because they grew up in dysfunctional homes where they thought even negative attention was love. If anger is passion, then calmness and peacefulness is ... (read in full...)

I no longer love my husband. How do I tell him?

Q.   How do i tell my husband that i stopped loving him? We have been married for 4 years and it has been rocky from the start. I those 4 years, i was determined to make it work...i did all the work solely as he provided the fiances... As i worke...

A.   23 July 2018: You've been with him for 4 years. That's enough time to figure out if his depression is caused by life events, or just an excuse to drink because of his alcoholism. Alcoholics are very good at denying and postponing the problem. They are selfish at ... (read in full...)

How do I tell my long-term girlfriend that I'm secretly gay and have had affairs with men?

Q.   Hi everyone.. Im looking for some genuine advice, if anyone would be so kind.. How do i come out and tell my long term girlfriend that I've had an affairs with men? I know its wrong, and i shouldn't have lied to myself and her, but i fou...

A.   22 July 2018: It doesn't matter what gender you are or what sexual orientation you are, people who are emotionally attracted to one kind while sexually attracted to another kind are bound to cheat, unless they do open relationships, become celibate, or focus ... (read in full...)

Am I overthinking his binge drinking?

Q.   I'm the kind of girl who likes the occasional night out to celebrate something. However my boyfriend is a party animal and it seems he would binge drink into the early hours quite often. Does this say something about his personality/values or am I ...

A.   4 July 2018: Party animals and serious relationships are not compatible. We only have 24 hours a day. He has very little time for you, sober or not. I would not bear it. Binge drinking affects the liver and the brain, and can have long term consequences and ... (read in full...)

My ex has I have slept together too many times!

Q.   My ex and I go to the same college. We see each other a lot considering we have many of the same friends. We broke up two months ago because I was stressed out a lot, and he was too about school and things happening with his family. But rece...

A.   4 July 2018: If all you get together to do is sex, it's because that's the only thing you or only him enjoy doing together. I would venture to say it's all him. He doesn't want to spend money on dates. If he has free time after studying he would spend it on his ... (read in full...)

Everything was perfect... until he lost his nan!

Q.   Hello everyone. My boyfriend and I had been together almost five months but have been friends for about a year. We had the most amazing relationship. We both had said that we had a stronger bond than we'd ever had with anyone else. We tackled any ...

A.   30 June 2018: He is grieving, and he can't think logically. He lost someone dear to him and while you can go on with life happily, he thinks he simply can't give you what you need. Life is not perfect, and to think that relationships can only go on when two ... (read in full...)

To have sex or not ever have sex?

Q.   Mod note: combined posts Why are people hypocrites when it comes to sex? And by that I mean, I am a 26 year old virgin and my friends tell me to wait and how my virginity is such a great gift. They will tell me I am lucky to be virgin, that sex ...

A.   29 June 2018: Your friends told you sex was overrated to make you feel good about keeping your virginity. Then they brag about their sexual conquests to console themselves that they are not having the best relationships, or not capable of having real ... (read in full...)

I want to let the past go and move forward from this dead relationship, thinking about it has been holding me back!

Q.   I'm in a bit of slump, again. Been with this guy for awhile now. He told me upfront that he was depressed from the start but i went straight to it without knowing what i've gotten myself into. I was 17 back then. He gave me a sweet memory at ...

A.   24 June 2018: Are you saying you want to date others, and pauses because you think the what ifs with your ex? He's an addiction for you. Normally he's someone that girls would try hardest to avoid but for you, you have trouble leaving him behind because he had ... (read in full...)

How do I make my girlfriend feel special and loved?

Q.   Hi guys, Thanks in advance for taking the time to read my post. Basically, my GF of almost one year has told me that she feels more like my best friend than girlfriend. I really need help in fixing things as I care about her a great deal and ...

A.   24 June 2018: I think she is used to insecure guys and you sound like a level headed person. A clingy boyfriend is easier to control, and is less likely to leave her. A normal boyfriend makes it unpredictable and creates insecurity in her mind. Honestly I don't ... (read in full...)

Should I give both of us another chance? Or not bother?

Q.   Hi everyone. I have this ex who i was with 2 years ago. We met and everything was great so much that we moved together in 3 months so we could be closer, he lived in another city. From that moment on he gradually changed and was becoming cold, ...

A.   15 June 2018: Even if by luck or chance that a person changed, you still see the former shadow. You would always wonder if old habits come back. If he really changed, let him impress another woman who does not have old issues to deal with, like you. My guess is, ... (read in full...)

Is this normal?? Am I stupid to love a man who does not respect the institution of marriage??

Q.   Dear Agony Aunt I am married for 20 years to a narcissistic surgeon with roving eyes yet I've stayed with him thinking that we love each other. He had been unfaithful to me and my young children once in the past and after leaving home he returned...

A.   15 June 2018: Never mind cancer. If I live in South Africa I would not touch anyone who hired prostitutes being that I am scared of contracting AIDS. Narcissistic people cannot love. Your husband loves the fact that you probably worked for him for free. He used ... (read in full...)

How do I stop being so insecure about my boyfriend’s last relationship?

Q.   Hello all.. So I’ll get right to it. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 months now, officially 3 months. I actually met him a year ago at my job. I sold cars and he was a customer of mine but he ended up buying a car from a competitor. But ...

A.   9 June 2018: He is going to have a new baby and that would be his new full time job. Any time, money and energy spent on you, that's time stolen from the baby. For that fact alone I would not want to date him. Even for married couples, their romance takes a back ... (read in full...)

Is he fighting with himself about his feelings for me?

Q.   I started college and started dealing with this guy on and off for like 8 months we were never in a relationship because we both decided that the timing was off since he would be leaving to go out of state for grad school. We decided on being ...

A.   9 June 2018: Even if you came over to his place and it wouldn't lead to sex, you shouldn't because you have feelings for each other. You can't be 100% confident that there won't be sex. I've heard so many stories of people who've had this tension building up and ... (read in full...)

Love triangle without an end

Q.   So this is what happened. I started dating this girl one year ago. She is 30, I am 35. At the beginning, it was exciting, she was classy, elegant, fun, spicy, etc. In the first months we had great sex and she was seeing the whole thing as fuck ...

A.   9 June 2018: I won't put myself in this situation, so yes I won't understand. Like you can debate if an alcoholic has a free will to purchase another case of beer, or to kick the habit. I would hope to see that the excitement will lessen each time but it ... (read in full...)

How should I handle finding these texts?

Q.   Some back story: My boyfriend and I have been together a little over a year. Aside from a few normal bumps and turns in the road, our relationship has been quite a breeze. We started off in a very unconventional way, though. I actually had a fling ...

A.   8 June 2018: I meant low value, not love value.... (read in full...)

How should I handle finding these texts?

Q.   Some back story: My boyfriend and I have been together a little over a year. Aside from a few normal bumps and turns in the road, our relationship has been quite a breeze. We started off in a very unconventional way, though. I actually had a fling ...

A.   8 June 2018: This is not just guy talk. These two guys are like bros before hoes. His friend is always trying to lure him back to the single lifestyle. To go along with it, your boyfriend bad talks you instead of standing up for you. Maybe their philosophy is ... (read in full...)

Love triangle without an end

Q.   So this is what happened. I started dating this girl one year ago. She is 30, I am 35. At the beginning, it was exciting, she was classy, elegant, fun, spicy, etc. In the first months we had great sex and she was seeing the whole thing as fuck ...

A.   8 June 2018: It sounds like you are the other man and her boyfriend does not know about you. I am guessing he's older, lives a distance away but gives her money. She is playing you both and reaping the maximum benefits. You don't have to feel so helpless about ... (read in full...)

Help for an "avoidant attachment style"

Q.   Dear Friends,Dear Community, I would like to have your advice today on a situation I am in. I am having feelings for a girl but the relationship is difficult because I have what is called an "avoidant attachment style". Which means I...

A.   7 June 2018: You do have a need for intimacy, but only when you have time and energy. I am guessing you put in 70% for work, 20% for recharging, and for the remaining 10% you are not sure how much time you can shell out for your girlfriend. Realistically you ... (read in full...)

Have you ever felt perplexed by a person's disinterest towards you?

Q.   To keep it short, I've been having sex with this guy for almost 2 years. I'm fine that it's not a relationship. Things have been good, but there is one thing that's been on my mind. Firstly, yes, we always talk before sex, he'll sometimes tak...

A.   7 June 2018: If you want to ask how to stop caring, the best person to ask is your FWB. Do you know enough of his life, his past which causes him to be disinterested? It's possible he is not interested in anything, and he doesn't care how he is coming across. Or ... (read in full...)

I think she thinks we are in a full-blown relationship!

Q.   DearCupid, I've been good friends with this girl for 2 years. We hang out on a pretty regular basis with our group of friends. One night she told me she liked me over text messages. I told her I liked her too. We talked about setting up a dat...

A.   6 June 2018: I can just imagine your stern, confused face when you were with her. I think she was rushing this a little bit. A connection has to be felt mutual. Just because you spent a day together doesn't mean you are in a full blown relationship. She's using ... (read in full...)

How can I handle the monotony and boredom of everyday life?

Q.   How can I handle the monotony and boredom of everyday life.:? Days off have no purpose, but I go to gym, I get a coffee, I see a movie.. Me alone and counting the hours til bedtime.....

A.   5 June 2018: That sounds like what people do on their days off. Nothing wrong. Life is not like a Bollywood parade everyday. If you have boredom inside you, then you bring boredom to everything you do and everyone you meet. You can change your mindset to think ... (read in full...)

Do I tell my wife about my bisexuality?

Q.   Hi everyone, I'm a male in my mid-30's and married, but I want to be able to admit to myself that I may be bi-sexual. I'm attracted to men like I am to women, but I love watching gay anal and shemale porn as well as straight porn. I have also had ...

A.   5 June 2018: You could tell her anything up to "I'd love to have sex with him again." Telling her about your bisexuality is going to cause her to be insecure, like she's not enough for you. Using porn to masturbate is not as bad as fantasizing on a real person, ... (read in full...)

She wants to meet up, what will she expect? Am I overthinking this?

Q.   Hey I have been talking to this girl online for roughly 3 weeks. We matched on dating app. I’m 27 and she is 36. First time I have flirted with someone few years older and it has been a pleasant surprise. We have been talking a lot, common ...

A.   3 June 2018: Yes I would consider someone younger. Many older women are past the age where their world would be over when a romance is finished. They are aware that younger men would want children one day even if the women don't. The men might one day move on to ... (read in full...)

Is it really a big deal that I didn't call?

Q.   I’ve been dating this guy (no official relationship) for a few months. We were old friends who got really close and started a romance. He did the chasing and I finally caught feelings after a while. We would hang out all the time. He would call me ...

A.   3 June 2018: Men with emotional issues start relationships, they come on strong and their reasons often do not have anything to actually wanting one. Their reasons could be, they are lonely. They stalked on ex's facebook pages and saw something that made them ... (read in full...)

Is it really a big deal that I didn't call?

Q.   I’ve been dating this guy (no official relationship) for a few months. We were old friends who got really close and started a romance. He did the chasing and I finally caught feelings after a while. We would hang out all the time. He would call me ...

A.   3 June 2018: I think the key lies in the fact that you weren't interested at first but developed feelings after persistent chasing. He resents the fact that he had to do this. From the start you probably sensed that something wasn't right but you gave him a ... (read in full...)

Is it really a big deal that I didn't call?

Q.   I’ve been dating this guy (no official relationship) for a few months. We were old friends who got really close and started a romance. He did the chasing and I finally caught feelings after a while. We would hang out all the time. He would call me ...

A.   2 June 2018: I was in the same experience 4 years ago. The only difference was that the guy had no children. It wasn't Disneyland but some local amusement theme park. It was so noisy there that it wouldn't have made sense to call. The day went by quickly and I ... (read in full...)

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