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*anniepeg agony aunt

*anniepeg

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*anniepeg's profile:

I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.

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Is my ex girlfriend crazy and a hypocrite?

Q.   My ex girlfriend broke up with me a few days ago. Literally the day after my bday actually. On my actual bday she was giving me the cold shoulder all day. She was more concerned with watching shows on her laptop then spending time with me. We were ...

A.   15 April 2017: As much as people want to say there is equality of sexes in the career department, there is still a bit of double standard when it comes to a man being able to provide financially for women. Maybe it's because it's easier for an incomeless woman to ... (read in full...)

I overthink and cannot just let things be in the moment.

Q.   Dear aunts and uncles, I often do overthink stuff and I feel like I am in this situation too. All I am asking here if for you guys to hear me out and give me your views and comments. Sorry if this post gets too long. Thank you in advance to al...

A.   24 March 2017: It's normal to feel the way you do. You've only been with each other for a short time. When he mentioned long term plans, it was reassuring but at the same time you begin to build expectations such that if he doesn't text you back, you worry about ... (read in full...)

Her past bothers me, though I do like our sex life!

Q.   Hey guys, I've been dating a girl for a few months and it's going really great, but her past has come up more than a few times (mainly by me) her lifestyle bothers me a bit she's 22 and loves to club. Has had 12 sexual partners her last dude wa...

A.   24 March 2017: You don't need a virgin as a girlfriend, and you don't need someone with a wild past in order to have a satisfying sex life. Just someone in between or someone who doesn't party that much. I guess the majority of people fall in the middle, the happy ... (read in full...)

Am I a sex addict? 101

Q.   I just turned 31. I think about sex atleast every 30 minutes. I mentally undress every woman i See or imagine them having sex although im actually not interested in women sexually. My partner count is about 73 men and 2 women. To me a man has to ...

A.   22 March 2017: It won't be a problem if you simply be a free spirit, meet a lot of people and enjoy what they have to offer. But you don't seem happy because there's guilt and you refer yourself as damaged goods. That's not a healthy attitude to have. Although ... (read in full...)

Is this a normal change for me to consider? Don't want to spend my birthday with family

Q.   Hi, in a few days I'll turn 35, but unlike the other years - when I used to get together with family members, this time I don't feel like celebrating or focusing on it at all. Is this normal? Thanks.....

A.   19 March 2017: Actually my whole family is like that. I can go celebrate to make my family happy but when I turned 36 last year I got sick that day that I couldn't even eat a cake so there was no celebration. There are more people who are fine with no celebration ... (read in full...)

Is my hubby just starting his mid-life crisis?

Q.   Dear aunts and Uncles, is my hubby just starting his mid-life crisis? He was always athletic and eat well so I can't say that all of a sudden he changed his life style, but he seems more interested in these areas. He picked up a new hob...

A.   19 March 2017: His problem is that he can't get an erection unless there is variety and novelty each time. As an effort to improve the marriage, he stopped porn. Unfortunately that did not reignite his desire for you. What he is saying is that you are not getting ... (read in full...)

I said "I love you" but he's not at that point and now I'm hurt/confused and wondering if I should break things off

Q.   About two weeks ago, I found myself (regrettably) drunk after a super fun night out with a group of friends and my boyfriend, who I have been seeing for nearly 6 moths. The BF very sweetly took care of getting me to my house, getting me into my ...

A.   16 March 2017: I don't think you should break things off. I think you should get used to the idea that love can be peaceful, quiet, and does not require constant reassurance about what level you are each at. To say he is not at "that point" can be inaccurate ... (read in full...)

We still like each other but I don't know how to make a move

Q.   I fell for a guy at a walking group a few years ago. There was a mutual attraction but people in the walking group did everything they could to make sure we did not date. At the time I thought these people were friends and were trying to protect me. ...

A.   11 March 2017: I would try to find out how important this walking group is, for him. If I were to date him I would be ready to quit the walking group if a relationship is more rewarding. Then I would suggest to meet outside of the walking group. ... (read in full...)

I don't know whether to keep seeing this man or not

Q.   I started dating a guy a few weeks ago, but a few things are worrying me. He knows a few gay men. One of these men kept asking me and this man what was going on between us. He pestered us for ages. This man jokingly blew the gay man a kiss. Another ...

A.   8 March 2017: He only said he isn't gay so you won't turn him down. A straight man won't say "he's not my type," because that implies he does have a type. It's also weird that he would blow a kiss to a guy who he later wanted to punch. Sounds like he wanted to ... (read in full...)

We went from sex twice a day to maybe once a week. I can't live without sex!

Q.   Hey here's the problem my boyfriend and I used to have sex twice a day morning and night we've been together just over 2 years he moved in after being together a year the past few months we hardly ever have sex maybe once a week I asked him if he ...

A.   7 March 2017: Maybe you feel like you can't live without sex but a lot of us, single by choice or not, are still living happy active lives. Maybe what you are seeking is not really the sessions that lead to a minute long tingling sensation, but rather the ... (read in full...)

My 22 year old daughter has sent nude photos to her boyfriend. How do I address this?

Q.   I recently discovered that my 22 year old daughter who is doing her post graduation has clicked and sent her nude pictures to her boyfriend. am concerned that its morally incorrect and also usually such pictures land up circulating. Its very...

A.   7 March 2017: I don't think nude photos usually get circulated. It's only in rare cases when there's a break up and there's a vindictive ex, or girls got involved with players only interested in collecting girls as a game. Or some creep who wants to post free ... (read in full...)

Is she being very friendly or flirting with some motive?

Q.   I shall try to make this short. I met a girl on a taxi when i was going to work. We chat and walk till i reach my work place. She ask my contact no. And we exchange our number. We didn't meet for the next 2 weeks. One day we happen to meet again on ...

A.   7 March 2017: She doesn't have the guts to just break up with his boyfriend so she is testing you to see if you can snatch you away from him. Her friendship with you is not innocent. Her boyfriend doesn't seem invested in the relationship either but neither of ... (read in full...)

I don't know whether to keep seeing this man or not

Q.   I started dating a guy a few weeks ago, but a few things are worrying me. He knows a few gay men. One of these men kept asking me and this man what was going on between us. He pestered us for ages. This man jokingly blew the gay man a kiss. Another ...

A.   7 March 2017: I see two concerns you have here. One is that he is bisexual and you worry whether he has the ability to concentrate on one person once he's in a relationship. Being bisexual absolutely does not mean one can't be faithful. You two have to build ... (read in full...)

Is it my fault I got put into the FWB category?

Q.   I've always been a woman that holds myself with dignity and believe that I have a lot to offer a man in a relationship. I am in no way saying this to brag or boast myself but my personality has always shined and others have told me so as well. ...

A.   19 January 2017: If you hold yourself with dignity, it means that whatever men do in your life, you don't take it personally or find fault in yourself. Honestly, I think this reflects on him, rather than on you. He was two timing you. Who would be able to trust him ... (read in full...)

Uncertain about my forthcoming marriage

Q.   im confuse with what i really feel and what should i do with my fiance. i doubt my thought and perception about him. sometimes i feel hes the right man for my life and future family. the other time i cant stand when we are together because we often ...

A.   5 December 2016: It seems like your fiancé is doing everything he can to reassure you but it's still not enough. There is no guarantees in life, even with a piece of marriage certificate. He's almost sexually pure, yet his history of a bj given by a prostitute could ... (read in full...)

He acted as though he liked me but then he went cold

Q.   In the begining of October this guy I havent seen since I graduated high school saw me out and spoke to me. Then a few days later he sent me a friend request and we talked for a few weeks on Facebook and he asked me for my number. We went out he ...

A.   4 December 2016: I feel you, and I want to say that somehow he needs to know that flirting then disappearing is not good manners. On the other hand, the practical side of me wants to caution you that flirting and kissing can't mean much if it's not backed up by ... (read in full...)

Why do I have crushes on women who are off limits?

Q.   Hello. I think that I'm experiencing my 3rd lifetime crush. I can only like girls who are older than me. I'm in my early twenties and all three girls I've had strong feelings for, were in their early thirties or so. And the worst part of it is th...

A.   3 December 2016: Crushes are most often not acted upon and they rarely develop into anything more. This does not invalidate your feelings and admiration towards that person. Nor is it wasting your time if you can decide to embrace it rather than feel embarrassed or ... (read in full...)

How do I accept compliments with confidence?

Q.   Dear cupids, This is a little embarrassing for me to admit. I head a team of three people at work and I am a bit of a shy and awkward kind of person. Whenever we mess up I know to behave like I'm sorry. I just take it on the chin, accept responsib...

A.   27 November 2016: The best way to respond to compliments is to thank the management for training and acknowledge hard work among your team, that you can't do it without them. Lastly is to say that you would keep up with the good work as there's is always room for ... (read in full...)

I've lost my best friend because of his jealous girlfriend

Q.   So I've been best friends with a guy since grade school. I haven't seen a lot of him this last year because I've been really busy studying for important exams, but we always kept in regular contact. In that time, he got a girlfriend. I bumped into ...

A.   8 October 2016: His girlfriend is a bully and has no class. Your so called best friend betrayed your friendship. They belong together. It's not that he's not seeing sense. He decides that his relationship with his girlfriend is more important. I am not sure if y... (read in full...)

Do you think he is selfish? Why does he have double standards over intimacy? Or am I overthinking?

Q.   Sorry English is not my first language. I am dating my boyfriend from last 1 year. My problem is related to our intimacy. When the first time we got intimate he asked me will you please give me a blow job i want to go down on you but you are havi...

A.   5 October 2016: Well, I will just tell him I can't give him blow jobs to protect his health, since he's the only healthy one and the dirty, corrupt world is all against him (sarcasm). Even if you are a virgin, if you have cold sores he could contract herpes down ... (read in full...)

What challenges can I expect in dating this woman?

Q.   Hey, I am looking for some advice I met a wonderful woman a few months back who is a single mother. We are both 28 years old. I have never been married, she is divorced with 2 boys ages 3 and 9. I really enjoy being with her...more than any...

A.   5 October 2016: I would first assume that she is looking for something serious, like you do. You might find it hard to find alone time with her. At the first few months, she may be trying to impress you so she would try her hardest to find babysitting so she can ... (read in full...)

Is it possible for your BF to have a tryst in an hour?

Q.   Likely or unlikely? Possible or not possible? Your boyfriend goes to the Home Depot and is gone for exactly one hour. Is it possible for him to leave his car in the Home Depot parking lot, have another woman pick him up, take him somewhere ...

A.   2 October 2016: I think anything is possible but you won't know for sure unless you put the gps tracker in his ass. Although I think this is too much hassle just to cheat. A desperate teenager might try something like that but for a guy who's mid age? Sex is just ... (read in full...)

I miss my ex sometimes but am afraid to tell my girlfriend

Q.   I miss my ex from time to time. We were together for 4 years. I have a gf and we are honest about everything. I feel bad for not telling her. We have been dating for 5 years. I never use to understand why people kept secrets between someone the...

A.   2 October 2016: If you want to tell her for the purpose of building trust and connection, saying missing your ex isn't going to do that. It would do the opposite. If you are hoping for understanding, empathy like a platonic friend would do, that's not going to ... (read in full...)

Criticized, humiliated and not loved and not appreciated. What do I need to do to get over this loveless marriage? I've put on weight and eventually my health will be affected.

Q.   I know I should be thankful for my marriage, home and trying to build up to a good life. But I have just woken up this morning and feel like maybe my marriage is just too hard to keep going. Mainly because our communication is terrible. I had ...

A.   2 October 2016: If she's willing to have a baby with you and not with anyone else, it means she doesn't care about love and marriage, as long as she gets to check off items in her to do list in life. You are someone who sponsors her citizenship, and probably her ... (read in full...)

LDR has it cooled, he finds it boring or...???

Q.   I would really appreciate some advice and your opinion. I've been in a LDR for a little over a month. We were together for a week before he had to leave and go back home (another continent!). We've been texting and talked over the phone a bit (I'...

A.   19 September 2016: His behavior does not suggest that you are in a relationship, more like a holiday fling but I guess he agreed it was, so that when he left, he felt good there would be someone missing him and welcoming him back next time you see him. But after he ... (read in full...)

What to do? I'm dating a woman aged 30 and I can't handle her "sleeping around" in the past.

Q.   I'm in my early 20s, not perfect but I met a woman who's 30 recently and we really hit it off. However shes has a LOT of bad things in her past. I'm not misogynist and I have obviously slept with girlfriends but she did a load of crazy stuff when...

A.   19 September 2016: Having sex at 16 in front of a crowd and taking drugs can not be considered fun. It's attention seeking when there's not enough love at home. At lot of wealthy families look perfect on the outside but inside there's no connection and people are ... (read in full...)

If I'm a good kisser, how likely is it that I'll also be a good lover?

Q.   I've made out with 5-6 girls and I think I'm a good kisser because I know women hate men who slober over them and I try to figure out what does it for them and try to make them feel good. I honestly think I get more enjoyment thinking I'm g...

A.   19 September 2016: I think a lot of women would like a pleaser, meaning that you think of their pleasure as priority. However, some women like dominant men who instruct them what to do. Some women want to skip foreplay and just go straight into long sessions. So there ... (read in full...)

I'm besotted with a female colleague

Q.   Hi, I'm currently married with children, happily I must add. Intimacy has been an issue between us for a longtime and not just sex but otherwise we are very happy and good together. About a week ago through the course of work I met another woman wh...

A.   19 September 2016: I don't think you are happy if you are feeling this way. You tell yourself to be happy, keep up a smile, to convince yourself so that you won't leave. Has your wife always been that way or did her sex drive dry up after having children? If not ... (read in full...)

Do I assume he's not intereted?

Q.   I'm feeling very confused about a guy at work!! I've like him for quite a while and we always have fun sort of banter, and went on a group holiday where we just got on really well and I sort of thought he might like me. anyway, a couple of weeks ago ...

A.   18 September 2016: It sounds like he has unfinished business with his ex an he went ahead of himself. If they were really over ages ago they would not be hanging around all the time. He would not bring in conversations of ex so much. You just won't hear about her. He ... (read in full...)

Dating has gotten me confused about what I want!

Q.   Dating and making decisions... Need advice! I am on a dating site. I agreed to meet two men on there. One I have been writing to for a few days, and we share the same goals in life, he is very handsome, and I can see a future with a man like him. He ...

A.   18 September 2016: I think you should wait for a new batch of guys, even if that takes time. If at age 30 you are not sure if you want the whole package of house and kids, then maybe you shouldn't pressure yourself to have them because it may make you settle for ... (read in full...)

Unexpected break-up. Can anyone give me any advice? Advice from guys would be much appreciated.

Q.   Me and my boyfriend were together for nine months and I was so happy. Suddenly, he broke up with me on Monday and I don’t understand why. He said he thinks we’re not suited and have different life experiences but I don’t understand how this can...

A.   18 September 2016: Whenever break up reasons sound bullshit, they usually are. Long distance relationships, long, short, going nowhere, are sometimes a cover up for the real reason that it can't be serious. It's easier to lie and to put up a front when most of your ... (read in full...)

He runs hot or cold. Should I continue to pursue him, or not?

Q.   Hello agony aunts and uncles, I am a 26 year old gay man in the need of advice. My story begins with a man that messaged me from afar on a dating app. In the beginning, I thought it was just going to be a long distance kind of thing that would fa...

A.   17 September 2016: People wouldn't usually look for serious relationships from others who live 4 hours away. I remember when I dabbled with dating sites and saw men who lived more than 2 hours away contact me, I would be wondering why bother, and just ignored them. I ... (read in full...)

I'm alarmed at my LDR boyfriend's interest in a receptionist

Q.   I'm in a long distance relationship. We only see each other about once a month. We've been together over 3 years. My boyfriend enjoys buying old cars from auctions, fixing them up, then reselling them. He has always brought his cars to a friend's...

A.   17 September 2016: You can ask your boyfriend if he knows she's single and if she knows of your relationship. Is there a plan that you would close this distance and get married, and if yes is he excited about it? Just from your post there isn't enough going on to ... (read in full...)

Dating has gotten me confused about what I want!

Q.   Dating and making decisions... Need advice! I am on a dating site. I agreed to meet two men on there. One I have been writing to for a few days, and we share the same goals in life, he is very handsome, and I can see a future with a man like him. He ...

A.   15 September 2016: Tell guy no. 2 that he has to quit smoking if he wants to keep seeing you (which I doubt he would do) and that he would need to take allergy medicine because you are not going to just hang out as his place all the time. If he takes the allergy ... (read in full...)

My best friends dad has turned his back on her

Q.   Dear Cupid My best friend needs support!! She was in hospital as of late last year for the health of her mind. She was having paranoid delusions such as believing that someone was out to harm her; they were psychotic episodes. Through ...

A.   15 September 2016: Just from hearing her side, it would seem like it's a story of an abusive dad causing her mental problems. Although it's also possible that from the beginning she was a difficult child to take care of and when she grew up she kept on giving her dad ... (read in full...)

Why am I jealous of this one girl who now means nothing to him?

Q.   So basically I have been with my BF 10 months today and things have been beyond perfect, few fights, no girl issues just pure love as we live about 2 hours away from Eachother (depending on traffic) he comes To see me every week and stays ove...

A.   14 September 2016: Love can be quite greedy. Your present is almost perfect because you only get to see each other once a week. You also want the future, and his past. What that girl had that you don't was the raw emotions and the painful unrequited love that he felt ... (read in full...)

I'm extremely insecure about my boyfriend's lesbian friend who seems so accomplished compared to me

Q.   My partner of 3 years and I are engaged, I am feeling so down about myself and insecure over something I have noticed ever since I first got with him. He tells me he loves me very much and wants to spend the rest of his life with me and everyone ...

A.   14 September 2016: Yeah, your fiancé sounds very braggy and he's feeing his obsession on his crush online. It's possible that during the 3 year relationship, he's telling her about dating you the first time, how in love he is, how now he's so happy to have found the ... (read in full...)

I am married to a lovely man but still pine for my ex but I don't want to feel that way!

Q.   im married to a guy who has been seen by my family. i was in relationship with a guy for 4 years before my wedding but he left me for another girl. so in that anger i just accepted for this wedding. my husband is really a nice person. he knows my ...

A.   13 September 2016: It sounds like this marriage was arranged and it was not built by solid commitment and connection. You married him in a desperate state and not out of love. When your husband went away it was like out of sight, out of mind. The closest thing you ... (read in full...)

How do you balance being true to your own vision with implementing advice from others?

Q.   How do we figure out the importance of being true to your own vision versus what is actually best for you. The only way I feel I have grown as a person is by listening selectively to people to see how they think I can improve also combined wi...

A.   13 September 2016: You should have said, "I think short hair suits you better" and stopped there instead of attributing his failure in dates to his long hair, which is outside your judgment. You don't know for sure his long hair is a turn off for other guys, or that ... (read in full...)

Crushing on someone 31 years older. But how can we have a future?

Q.   I am crushing very hard on a 57 year old man and he doesn't know. He's told me that he feels a "connection" to me is attracted to me and cares for me. We went out as friends and ended up talking for almost four hours in a restaurant. He was ...

A.   13 September 2016: I understand what the last answer was saying. So what is the danger in falling in love with a charming guy you may ask? The moment he withdraws affections (purposefully, you can it love bombing and love starving) is the moment you are tempted to win ... (read in full...)

Crushing on someone 31 years older. But how can we have a future?

Q.   I am crushing very hard on a 57 year old man and he doesn't know. He's told me that he feels a "connection" to me is attracted to me and cares for me. We went out as friends and ended up talking for almost four hours in a restaurant. He was ...

A.   12 September 2016: There will be a divide in the outcome, depends on how you look at this. If your mindset is to get married and have kids in 5 years, have someone you can show off to your family, he won't be a good choice. If you see artistic or spiritual value in ... (read in full...)

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