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Is it wrong to end things with a good person when they are not your type?

Q.   Is it wrong to end things with someone cause they are not your type? they treat you wonderful,they come on really strong,you wish your ex would of treated you this way. the one who treated you bad you fell for,now I have someone who would do ...

A.   21 April 2017: No one will *ever* be your type as long as you're not over your ex. I don't think you realize how serious this is for you AND for any woman you hurt from here on out that you choose to date while NOT being over your ex. Any time you start th... (read in full...)

I stumbled across hidden videos in my girlfriends computer of her having sex with her ex

Q.   I am engaged to my dream girl and our relationship is perfect. We've been together for 2 years now and We are the perfect couple... or so I thought.. Things changed when I found some things on her lap top. I needed to finish up a report but forgo...

A.   19 April 2017: Ahh, now THIS one is complicated. I like the complicated questions on here! Everything was all straightforward - you were upset about her keeping old sex videos either inadvertently or deliberately, but the real complication was that watching... (read in full...)

I had to cancel my wedding because of my boyfriend's attitude, I'm still trying to make it work but he has nothing to offer to the relationship and wants me to justify why I want to get married!

Q.   I've been in a relationship with my partner for six, almost seven years. We got together in our early 30's and are now in our late 30's. I've always been very vocal about what I want from our relationship - a long term commitment with marriage an...

A.   18 April 2017: I don't think you're with him because you love him. You could separate him for any warm willing male person willing to go through with a marriage. You are not pushing him out of any sense of love. You're pushing him because YOU want to be ... (read in full...)

I thought my fiance didn't love his ex wife but his old Facebook post seemed to imply otherwise

Q.   I am so disappointed please tell me if I'm over reacting. I found an old post from 6 years ago on my Fiancé face book on his marriage anniversary stating how lucky he was to have her and he hit a jackpot and hope this happiness never ends! I know ...

A.   18 April 2017: I have a couple of points to make to you, one directly answering your question, and the other one I need to make to you, or else something similar to this WILL come up again. First point - you ask us how he can make posts like this while at the s... (read in full...)

Is it all in my head or do I have something to be worried about?

Q.   So to be completely honest I'm 16 and I'm worried my boyfriend came in me about 3-4 weeks ago.. it's really been messing with me.. I took the morning after pill as soon as I could which was the third day but a little bit after 72 hours. I asked him ...

A.   16 April 2017: First of all, your boyfriend doesn't know if he CAME?? REALLY?! I'd say that's a big YES. Second of all, stress and hormone fluctuations can also cause changes in your menstruation, and with a double dose of morning-after pill plus the NUVA rin... (read in full...)

Am I selfish and bad to be feeling so disappointed that he reneged on his original decision to aim to propose to me soon?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have talked about getting married for a while, and a few months back he told me when he'd hope to propose. I was getting very excited. That time-frame hasn't happened yet, however now he is saying he simply cannot afford the ring...

A.   16 April 2017: Damn those stupid jewelry companies for even coming up with the idea of an engagement ring in the first damn place!! De Beers started it with the "A Diamond is Forever" slogan in the Great Depression of all times to get people to spend ridiculous ... (read in full...)

Is my ex girlfriend crazy and a hypocrite?

Q.   My ex girlfriend broke up with me a few days ago. Literally the day after my bday actually. On my actual bday she was giving me the cold shoulder all day. She was more concerned with watching shows on her laptop then spending time with me. We were ...

A.   16 April 2017: You were together and fell in love after only 2 months?? No, this has nothing to do with accepting some good guy. I noticed that you said this: "Her best friend pays for my ex's cell phone bill and pays for anything else she needs." You a... (read in full...)

Am I asking too much of my fiance?

Q.   my fiance in the past has been drugged while at a club, drives 1.5 hrs from clubs after drinking.. all i ask when out on girls night out or on our dates is that i get texte,called or snapchatted to know she is home safe . i get: i fell asleep,phone ...

A.   16 April 2017: When was she drugged while at a club?? Who drugged her, and what happened to her when it happened?? Her driving drunk and putting people at risk, or staying out and clubbing until all hours of the night is not good fiance material. If you ... (read in full...)

I waited 3 years to tell my LDR boyfriend that I have 2 children and now he's unsure of how he feels

Q.   I've been in a 3 year long distance relationship with my boyfriend. I'll admit I've been wrong in never disclosing to him that I've been married, divorced, and have two teenage children. I'm also 42 yrs old while he's only 33 yrs old. I've trav...

A.   16 April 2017: There is no excuse whatsoever for catfishing a guy for 3 years. You lied about who you were, you hid your age and you hid that you're a single mom for 3 years and had been married and divorced. Your "reason" is also a lie. You withheld your age ... (read in full...)

I have my ex husband's last name. My current boyfriend wants me to change back to my maiden name. Should I?

Q.   My boyfriend does not like that I have kept the surname of my ex husband. It is just easier as my child's last name would be the same as mine. My boyfriend said it does not matter if my child's last name is different from his mother. I ...

A.   15 April 2017: The problem is in his (and your) thinking. Don't think of this last name in terms of "my ex-husband's last name". Think of it in terms of "my child's last name". Your boyfriend is suffering a bit of retroactive jealousy, but it's your child th... (read in full...)

Was sending that message to my BF the best option? Or did I just stoke the fire more?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 months and have been friends for years before that. One thing I know about him is that when he gets upset he doesn't want to talk right away so when I know he's upset I'll just leave him alone until he's ...

A.   14 April 2017: PS - I'm not trying to be harsh on you! I'm angry at your d-bag of a boyfriend. I'm guessing this has been a pattern he's put on you, and people who behave like that who intentionally hurt and stress their partners pisses me off nearly as bad as ... (read in full...)

Was sending that message to my BF the best option? Or did I just stoke the fire more?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 months and have been friends for years before that. One thing I know about him is that when he gets upset he doesn't want to talk right away so when I know he's upset I'll just leave him alone until he's ...

A.   14 April 2017: I think you should have chucked the entire idea of an email. I would never be with a guy who forces people to walk on eggshells until he feels like talking. And your email didn't make your point at all, because you didn't say what you REALLY ... (read in full...)

Why is it a sought after fantasy, that satisfies so many men, to want to watch women hurt and degraded during a porn film?

Q.   With the proliferation and popularity these days of extreme hardcore porn much of which depicts violence towards women , do men still see women as worthwhile individuals or are we just sexual objects for their gratification? Although I understand p...

A.   14 April 2017: In many people who watch porn regularly and have become addicted to it, as with many other drugs like heroin, cocaine, or meth, the more the drug is used, the more desensitized the addict is, so it takes more and more and stronger drugs to try and ... (read in full...)

Is it possible for a man to have a friend with benefits he isn't attracted to?

Q.   I met a fellow on a dating site a few months ago with the mutually-agreed-on purpose of only having sex. Since then, we've continued to hook up, but it's been happening less and less - from several times a week to once every 1-2 weeks - although he ...

A.   12 April 2017: Listen, you picked the WRONG type of relationship to test your insecurities on, because by its very nature, FWB rejects a permanent or emotional connection in favor of no-strings-attached sex. Nearly all relationships start out with tons of sex b... (read in full...)

My Gf is 14 and I'm 17. Once I turn 18 and she turns 15 will it still be ok to date her? Can't find an answer anywhere

Q.   Hello, I am currently in a relationship with an absolutely amazing girl for 4 months and we are going to the same school, and we live in Washington state but at the end of this school year she has to move to the other side of this same state but I ...

A.   12 April 2017: You're from Washington State?? You're *REALLY* lucky you're in that state, because the age of consent plus exceptions based on age and circumstance varies wildly and greatly from state to state. I'll spell it out for you here as well, but here... (read in full...)

I'm a teen and I'm feeling insecure about the size of my penis. Am I normal, in size?

Q.   Hey guys. I'm 15. First question - is my dick size good. It's around 6.7-6.8in. or so in length fully erect. I'm that's a good size, yet I still constantly feel like it's small. It could be the girth. I have a problem with. I don't really have a ...

A.   10 April 2017: You're totally fine!! And yes, you're a "grower", or as I like to say - your penis is a lightsaber. Your measurements are perfect, and you have no reason whatsoever to be embarrassed by your equipment. If I may give you a small piece of advic... (read in full...)

Why show the picture, to show me she looked like that porn star?

Q.   Why would my guy show me a picture of a porn star and say, "before I knew you, a woman who looked exactly like this asked me out" ? Is he trying to make me feel insecure or point out that, "hey look I can get a woman sexier than you" ? What's hi...

A.   9 April 2017: Oh my lord. He actually showed you a picture of a porn star and said that??? HAHAHA! The sense of humor in me would be SOOOO tempted to go find a really raunchy porno on the internet, find the one with a musclebound guy with the biggest,... (read in full...)

Can intercourse make a woman tighter?

Q.   Ok my wife is usually is avrage tigjt like not too tight but no loose. We has sex this morning and she was tight. She has cheated in the past amd she a lier for sure. If u have sex with someone can it cause ur vigina to be tighter ...

A.   9 April 2017: The answer is NO, it can't cause your vagina to be tighter. I think your imagination is running away with you, but if she has cheated in the past, and she has been lying to you, then this is not about her vagina, and it's ALL about the fact that ... (read in full...)

30 year age difference and she's starting to talk about having kids. I do not want to lose her but just can't go back to raising another family

Q.   I am a single 54 year old man who has been dating a 24 year old woman now for the last 5 years. I was 49 and she was 19 when we met. It started as friends with benefits but now I am afraid she has gotten closer and started to say I love you. W...

A.   8 April 2017: Anon Reader - I didn't infer a single thing that the OP didn't say himself. And you know as well as I do that at his age of 49 at the start of this relationship means he's been around the block, and at her age of 19, she has NOT. Barely out of ... (read in full...)

30 year age difference and she's starting to talk about having kids. I do not want to lose her but just can't go back to raising another family

Q.   I am a single 54 year old man who has been dating a 24 year old woman now for the last 5 years. I was 49 and she was 19 when we met. It started as friends with benefits but now I am afraid she has gotten closer and started to say I love you. W...

A.   8 April 2017: I'm sorry, but you need to do the right thing and end it now. The problem is the fact that this isn't merely an age difference issue. You're using her for sex, and she's fallen for you. It's immoral for you to keep using her, taking advantag... (read in full...)

I caught my partner in a lie. Now he's verbally abusive and constantly puts me down

Q.   My partner is so different since I caught him out with a lie. We aren't young (both in our 40's) and there should be no grey areas within our relationship. He has lied to me several times about minor things, lied to at least 5 times about bigger ...

A.   7 April 2017: Can you be specific? What does he lie about? And what do you mean when you say "there should be no gray areas". What exactly happened with this girl on Facebook??... (read in full...)

My Bf is annoying me with his alarm setting each day. How can I get him to stop this?

Q.   my bf drives me crazy with his alarms in the morning - he sets them 40 minutes before i wake up for work on two different devices - each device goes off once every minute for forty minutes so 80 annoying alarms!!! i wake up in a bad mood as i have...

A.   7 April 2017: I agree with Honeypie! My husband is also one of those "hour long snooze hitters". He's lucky that I can sleep through anything short of a nuclear airstrike, but the one time he did it on a weekend, and I had the flu that day, he hit the snooze, ... (read in full...)

I prefer staying home to attending his family gatherings! Is this going to be a problem?

Q.   Dear all, I am married to a wonderful guy and yet I've always been a bit of a loner. We always joke that we love being loners together. He comes from a large happy family and they meet every now and then for a huge meal. I have no issues with his ...

A.   6 April 2017: Holidays like Easter and Christmas are one of those times you SHOW UP. NOBODY likes the big family productions. I have one next Saturday myself I'd love to get out of, but you sign up for that sort of thing when you get married and join into a ... (read in full...)

Coping strategies would be appreciated for bad office situation!

Q.   Not a relationship problem but hoped you guys could give me a bit of advice. I work in a small company of just over 20 staff, most of us working in a large open plan office. One of the women, who is in her 30s, has taken to wearing short SH...

A.   6 April 2017: Welcome to the 21st century, where calling someone out is a one-way ticket to violent defensiveness. Just go on Youtube and look up confrontations involving people who aren't disabled illegally parked in designated handicapped parking spots. Even ... (read in full...)

I still think of my ex all the time. Does that suggest that I should break up with the new lady, who I am currently dating?

Q.   Am seeing some one new, for the last couple months, so my question is, what does it mean when I say, ''I wish my ex would of treated me this good''. Does it mean I should break up with the new one? I still think of my ex all the time, over a year ...

A.   5 April 2017: You know, years ago I read on a message board where someone similar to yourself was talking about her ex along the same lines as you, and she made the remark "Hate is love set on fire" to which a very humorous person responded with "Divorce is ... (read in full...)

Extremely close to my female best friend, slept together once... Now she's falling for me even though we agreed not to have "those" feelings

Q.   I have this female best friend. We ar very close so close we know everything obout eachother ther is no secrets between us we tell eachother things no one else knows. We hang out every chance we get. We are so close that we have even slept together ...

A.   4 April 2017: So it's YOU with the feelings too, and now you feel vulnerable, right?? If you have feelings for her, and she said this to you: "she says that im the greates guy she has ever met and no one respects her like i do. And im the only guy she tru... (read in full...)

Extremely close to my female best friend, slept together once... Now she's falling for me even though we agreed not to have "those" feelings

Q.   I have this female best friend. We ar very close so close we know everything obout eachother ther is no secrets between us we tell eachother things no one else knows. We hang out every chance we get. We are so close that we have even slept together ...

A.   3 April 2017: Agreements not to have "those" feelings is like agreeing for water not to be wet. It's a law of nature, and if feelings develop, you'd have better luck trying to hold back a rainstorm rather than continue with some "Friend with benefits" situation ... (read in full...)

I'm very happy in my relationship but why do I suddenly want to contact my abusive ex to tell him how awful he was to me?

Q.   When I was 16-18 I dated an emotionally and physically abusive man who was a little older than me. My first time was with him and it wasn't something I wanted, but we were somehow together for a couple years. When it ended, it didn't properly end. . ...

A.   31 March 2017: First of all, if a guy was physically abusive towards you, you shouldn't want to be in the same COUNTY, let alone in the same room as he is. Second, you're healing from the ordeal. Your life is on the upswing, and your ego wants to confront... (read in full...)

My mother has blocked contact can I get visitation rights to see my sisters?

Q.   Well, idk how to start. Recently about a month ago my Mothers husband and I got into a disagreement because he yelled at my sister which is not his daughter and as always I defended . well my mom took his side and blocked me on Facebook and forced ...

A.   30 March 2017: Ahh, this is a question for a family lawyer, and there are many who work pro-bono to help people like you. I do not know which state you hail from, as states have different laws for family issues, but many states will mandate sibling visitati... (read in full...)

Her parents insist we don't talk for 5 years! They disapprove of our relationship!

Q.   I had been in in relationship with my girlfriend for 7 months. She's 18 and I'm 17.We just so in love with each other. We chatted all day, we share our everyday life ,topics and stories. We greet each other good morning and first thing in the ...

A.   30 March 2017: Her parents can SAY that all they want. The bottom line is that she is an adult according to the laws of Malaysia. This means that while her parents can insist on some 5-year thing, which really means that they're trying to get her to forget you, ... (read in full...)

I'm in a sexless marriage due to my wife's depression and now menopause. What do I do?

Q.   My wife had 10 months off work with work related depression now the menopause has struck We have not had sex for nearly 2 years and even sleep in different rooms at times as she is in bed by 9pm most nights due to the medication. I am now becoming ...

A.   30 March 2017: Ahh, so this is a medical issue. Her medication destroys her sexual drive and response capacity. Many depression medications have the unfortunate side effect of virtual chemical castration in guys, and rendering a girl's sex drive into an asexual ... (read in full...)

Does my boyfriend have commitment issues? He won't change his address

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been living together for almost a year, but he hasn't changed his address with the post office. He is still picking up mail at his parents house. We moved in together June 2016. Last weekend I mentioned it and he said, "t...

A.   30 March 2017: OH!! BE CAREFUL with this one. You live in the US, so there's absolutely no hassle with address changes. It's free, and when done online, the mail starts at the new location within 1 day. There's only one reason why he's hiding his mail ... (read in full...)

We booked a weekend away to save our relationship and he wants to play soccer! Am I selfish? Am I not a priority to him?

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been having fighting almost non-stop for the last 3 weeks with things being hard since the new year. Every time we make up and promise not to fight, we do it again. We have been together almost 2 years and been through ...

A.   30 March 2017: I want to address something NOT addressed by the other aunts: Your parents' divorce. I know of a church that had existed for 25 years under the same pastor and his wife. Then, the shocker - they separate and eventually divorced each ot... (read in full...)

Do you think I have the right be upset since technically he is still married?

Q.   I moved to a new town and got a job as a server at a local restaurant. One of my co workers is very cute and a lot of the girls like him. They are always going out as groups and hanging out with each other outside of work. We became really ...

A.   22 March 2017: Ahh, you're young. This is a lesson then. I'm sorry you had to learn it the hard way that many married men are straight up dogs even with their own co-workers. You'd think they'd know not to S*** where they eat, but some men are just jerks that ... (read in full...)

Whose last name do I give to my baby?

Q.   My mom thinks I should give the baby the fathers last name but I don't think I should because I'm not married to him and he isn't in the picture. Won't that be an issue at school for my son and wherever I take him, if we have different last nam...

A.   22 March 2017: If the father is not in the picture, your son's name should be yours, not his. That's what I believe anyways. I understand your mom's line of thinking, but two things are driving that, both being antiquated lineage record-keeping related.... (read in full...)

Do you think I have the right be upset since technically he is still married?

Q.   I moved to a new town and got a job as a server at a local restaurant. One of my co workers is very cute and a lot of the girls like him. They are always going out as groups and hanging out with each other outside of work. We became really ...

A.   21 March 2017: I'd be upset, but not at a co-worker. HE should have said something before his lips were on yours, and YOU should have asked him "are you single" before your lips were on his. He's a married man. Being separated for a month is still married, only ... (read in full...)

I feel so insecure because he hasn't said the "L" word.

Q.   I've seen this type of post a few times on here, but I wanted to share my personal situation and get your input. Thanks in advance! My BF and I are 24. We've been officially dating for 5 months. These months have been extremely happy. He is so ...

A.   21 March 2017: Five months is too soon! Feeling infatuation is different than declaring love. You should be sitting back and enjoying spending time with him rather than analyzing who's saying what and when. Do NOT say it first, especially since you recognize ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend says he doesn't care about things!

Q.   My boyfriend lives with me and I mean, we've had our arguments, but I find that he pays no attention to me. He goes to work, the gym, then he comes home and plays video games until we go to bed and pays more attention to the dog even. I've asked him ...

A.   21 March 2017: You're asking the wrong questions, to be honest. The question "What's wrong?" shouldn't be asked of HIM because the "what's wrong" is the information YOU should be sharing. He is fine with his life, work, gym, video games, and you're the one who ... (read in full...)

Roomies are all going in different directions so how do we divide the stuff we bought together?

Q.   It's coming to the end of our lease and I [26,M] just found out I need some major dental work that's going to cost me a TON of money. So to save up again I'm moving back in with my ex-girlfriend, Lana,[22,F] I won't have to pay anything so I should...

A.   19 March 2017: What the hell??? This ex Lana is paying for your needs while you save up for dental work, and you're quibbling over a toaster oven?? I think that belongs to Lana, not you. You say that she gets "power over you". What kind of a man ARE you?? ... (read in full...)

He has not told his ex about me yet. Is is reasonable for me to feel so hurt? Am I over-reacting?

Q.   I've been going out with my partner for one year. We both have kids from previous relationships. Being a mother and full time parent i have included him in my two kids lives. We both have teenage daughters. He spent christmas with his ex and stay...

A.   19 March 2017: Telling the ex and telling the children I see are two separate issues. I am inclined to agree with Honeypie in this instance - I'd be questioning whether or not they're divorced or merely separated and still married. That happens much more than ... (read in full...)

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