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... Send *anniepeg a private message | | | *anniepeg's profile:I am 34, married a second time. My son is 9 years old and 2 cats. He keeps me busy. My hobbies are movies, recreational games like xbox games, darts, badminton and dear cupid of course. I used to play the piano but stopped. I have been here for 6 years. Every year I see myself change. Every day is a surprise, an opportunity for growth while some days are just coasting along wondering what the point is. My relationship views are a mix of traditional values and modern, open minded ones. I still believe in long term monogamy as it feels right to me. Other than that I feel there are too many rules in a relationship that I would like to get rid of. Dearcupid is a source of my learning about relationships. I am too young to form a conclusion of what love is. I guess I will grow old with this site.
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Should I stop talking to her altogether and if I see her should I ask for any explanation re the bar incident?
Q. Never been in this situation before so I thought I'd ask for the insight of those perhaps more experienced than myself. So, I've been texting this girl I met met at a bar for about a month. So on the 15th we had drinks, made out, etc. So I hit ...
A. 25 October 2015: I think you can act like as if you don't know her either if you see her out. She didn't want her new date to be awkward although She's obviously not looking for anything serious. You might think shoving her tongue in your throat means strong ... (read in full...)
Our sex drives are not aligned. Is there any way I can lower my sex drive?
Q. My husband and I have been together since high school and we have a great relationship all Expect for one thing. Our sex drives are not at the same level. I'm not worried he is getting it any where else or anything like that. I know he loves me and ...
A. 21 October 2015: Uhm, lowering your sex drive. Go on birth control if you haven't already. Have babies. There's nothing more libido killing thAn taking care of children. Just kidding. Go to the gym instead. Become a vegetarian. You still need to research and test ... (read in full...)
I caught my girlfriend lying twice about where she spent the night
Q. Hello everyone, so i am currently on a break with my gf because she lied to me twice in a row. However, with all this halloweens parties coming up that we had planned to go together it seems like added pressure to end the break faster. What ha...
A. 20 October 2015: I don't think there's anything embarrassing to tell a boyfriend that she's going to have a sleepovers at her girlfriends. That's assuming it's just girls there. The problem started when she's going out too much when you wished to spend more time ... (read in full...)
Do I have reasons to be frustrated with my boyfriend?
Q. Im currently frustrated with my boyfriend. Can you please let me know if I have reason to be frustrated or I'm just totally pms-ing? My boyfriend's friend got into an accident and needed to bring his car to get fixed at the autobody shop. My boyfr...
A. 20 October 2015: If it's his money then yes he's babying him too much. Otherwise I think helping is what friends are for when they are in need. Depends on how injured he is. If you have reasons to believe his friend is trying to occupy too much of his time then your ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of one year is pushing to get married and I'm not ready for it!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year. I am 32 and he is 37. Neither of us have been married or have children.We live about 40 mins from one another. Here is the problem. He has been putting the pressure on me very heavy the last 4-5 ...
A. 20 October 2015: You tell him to stop this high school bullshit of relying on others for transportation, of rushing into things prematurely and see what he says. Maybe he's still living with parents and have a DUI with thousands owing in his license.... (read in full...)
My piano teacher and I are close, but is it too close?
Q. My teacher and I are very close. He always tells me I'm his favorite student and we always joke and have interesting sometimes inappropriate conversations. He told me I'm beautiful, he always gets upset when other people hit on me. And he has hugged ...
A. 20 October 2015: I took piano lessons for more than 15 years. One of them was making hints that he would marry a younger woman (my age) one day. One of them I had a crush on and we kept our flirtations minimal and subtle. What your teacher is doing is way out of ... (read in full...)
Why did my ex give up on me? Why does he do things with his fiance that he refused to do with me?
Q. We dated for three years. He went through some tough times and I was always by his side, helping him and never leaving him. We went through a bad patch, argued every day. He said we needed a short break. He said he will always love me and be there...
A. 20 October 2015: Here's another opinion. It's correct that constant arguments is a sign of incompatibility and it takes two to argue. However arguments don't come out of nowhere unless one of you had been provoking them on purpose. To make you conform, to test your ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has been in his cave for too long! Help!
Q. I've been in a 'relationship' with my long distance boyfriend for only 4 weeks. He is great; smart, funny, sexy, interesting and we both feel a definite connection. The first 2 weeks, although long distance, over the phone chatting were amazing. I ...
A. 19 October 2015: I don't think you had a relationship. Maybe he looked for someone to chat and got carried away. It's easy to say things and be whoever you want to be online. Even if it's a real long distance relationship, he doesn't need a man cave from you and ... (read in full...)
Having sex with him was so unsexy I felt like a was doing a shft at work!
Q. I have recently started dating again and have been seeing this one guy in particular for a couple of months now. Last night things progressed further than they have and we moved to the bedroom, however it was a bit of a disaster in my eyes. He s...
A. 19 October 2015: He decided early on that vaginal sex won't work for him. He settled for having sex with a hand. You have to be honest and tell him. Or you wait until you are fed up with one more week of this and get angry with him. If he doesn't change his sex ... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend look in porn for women who look like his ex?
Q. Why did he tell me he always looked for porn of women who looked like his ex yet when I asked him if he ever did that with me whilst we are apart ( LDR) he said he did only once . It makes me feel very unattractive to him when we can't be together ...
A. 17 October 2015: I don't think so many women just coincidentally look like his ex. He is either still hung up on his ex or he says things to make you insecure. The best kind of boyfriend would stop looking at porn, because they have no need. There are better things ... (read in full...)
Is he just playing around with me while waiting for someone else?
Q. I haven't had a relationship in four years, and my last one started very fast, so I think I'm a little lost with my current situation and would love some help. Around mid June, I met this guy online. We exchanged a few messages and met in pers...
A. 17 October 2015: I think I believe him when he says he wasn't seeing anyone else, but one thing for sure is that he doesn't want a full on relationship. A guy who is serious would not ask questions to test you and wait to see what happens. He would make sure to date ... (read in full...)
I've met a new girl but still have feelings for the other girl, and I don't want to be that guy. Advice on how to decide who to pursue?
Q. I was seeing this girl recently and we've slept together and kissed etc but the we sort of said lets just be friends cause we were arguing. so we did just that and then a girl started talking to me and we were getting along so we exchanged numbers ...
A. 14 October 2015: "Let's be friends" is probably the dead end statement you could have with someone. You can't backtrack it and if you did it would only create confusion and drama. It's hard to be friends also. I am afraid she's going to create more damsel in ... (read in full...)
Is there any way around his refusal to sign these documents? It's stopping me from travelling with her.
Q. Is there any way around getting my daughter a passport when her father is refusing to sign for it or let me borrow any of the legal documents needed. He isn't apart of her life and never has been but when she was born, he came to the hospital...
A. 14 October 2015: I don't know about UK laws. My son's dad had no contact with him since 2008. I got divorced in 2011 and got full custody. I went to apply for his passport and was able to have it approved. The father section was totally blank. The immigration ... (read in full...)
He goes too deep, how can I make it easier?
Q. I hope someone can help. My husband and I have hot sessions in the bed room department but my main issue is getting him to come. He prefers to be mega deep penetrating but I find it really uncomfortable. Does anyone have any advice on how to ...
A. 13 October 2015: No you should not do anything you are uncomfortable with. Cumming should not be a struggle for either of you. If there is a reason why people prefer virgins, this is it. They don't want to do anything their exes did or their view of sex influenced ... (read in full...)
I can't stay hard when my girl gives me a BJ, help me please
Q. hey guys i'm new here and i don't know where else to go to. i need some advice. i've been in an amazing relationship with this girl and she is the jewel of my life. i have a vast sexual history, however she does not. she is so new to the whole sex ...
A. 13 October 2015: She's a virgin so she is not expected to know the basics. You are at different levels. While you had exes to compare, she is just exploring. You know, for my first time, the penis is like a big snake, pumping with blood, full of life. My hand shook ... (read in full...)
Is sexting ok when you are in a relationship?
Q. It was a two month relationship. I found him sexting other women and I lost it,cried the whole night etc,didn't let him sleep but the lies he told the other woman was devastating. I have learnt my lesson to leave if anything like this happens ...
A. 12 October 2015: I don't think you had a relationship. Don't count this as your first. What he did was not a reflection of you. Although I would feel sad for him. I would not deprive my husband of friends but when it comes to sex it's only us and no one else. Your ... (read in full...)
Why would he contact me in the first place, offering himself as a friend or whatever, and then never call and ignore my message?
Q. I'm totally confused and need some advice. I dated a guy a few months back. We were incredibly close. We were emotionally, physically and intellectually intimate. Long story short - he fell in love with someone else and now they're together. Living ...
A. 12 October 2015: He kept you in the waiting list in case he goes through a drought period, or he got bored with his girlfriend or they have arguments. However contact would be on his terms so it would be no strings, no fuss, and causes no inconvenience in his life. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't respond in kind when I say "I love you". The last 2 times he said "Pardon???"
Q. I've been seeing my boyfriend now for almost 3 months and I really love him. I've felt like I love him for sometime but suppressed telling him because it wasn't quite the right time and it didn't feel like the right time. Then last weekend we were ...
A. 12 October 2015: I think he could't believe you said it and wanted to make sure he wasn't dreaming. From your last posts I learned he was shy, socially awkward, can't perform well in bed and probably overweight and not fit. So he could have a low confidence and ... (read in full...)
Five years together. Am I just staying with him because I'm scared to be alone? Or are my doubts due to the other guy's crush on me?
Q. Hi, it's been a while. I have been with the same guy for going on five years now... In those five years we have split up (once) for a period of about three months. We have been back together since last October, so for about a year now... That b...
A. 12 October 2015: You know, old flames/crushes always turn up in your life to test your strength of your relationship. Your three month separation made you reflect and at the end you chose him again. That alone says something. In order for the future to work you have ... (read in full...)
How can I be in love with a monster?
Q. Please help me aunts and uncles. I'm stuck in love with an absolute monster who stepped out on me at the beginning of the year, and has been gone since. We were so great together, we planned for a baby, we had it all. Fast forward, I move in with ...
A. 11 October 2015: I think you love the illusion you call love. Abusers seem to love passionately and possessively. It made you hang onto the good side of him and believe it's your fault when that side of him left. People have love addictions also get stuck in ... (read in full...)
Why did he even bother defending himself and bother setting up a time to call me if he wasn't interested?
Q. I was casually dating a guy for a few months but then he started pulling back a little and giving confusing, mixed messages. He ended up disappearing for 2 weeks before I was going on a trip, not responding to any of my messages and he didn't even ...
A. 11 October 2015: It's better than admitting he has no patience waiting for you for 3 weeks. Do you know how bad it sounds if he told you he wasn't interested after hearing you were going on a trip? So he pretended it was an issue of miscommunication. There wasn't ... (read in full...)
My trust is wavering with my girlfriend. I see her standing way too close to another man
Q. Dear Cupid, Long story short, I met this amazing woman at the hospital I work at (a nurse), and we have been talking since the beginning of the year. She says she loves me, and her son looks up to me like a father. I honestly felt we had a solid f...
A. 8 October 2015: I think her reaction of almost breaking up with you was extreme. Maybe she didn't like it when you talked to your friend about it. It made her feel exposed and embarrassed. If she's not the kind to cheat, she's a natural flirt. Did you say she sat ... (read in full...)
I'm frustrated, hopeful and yearning for more! Help? Advice?
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm a 46 year old gay male. I've developed a relationship with a 20 year old straight male (friends only) that lives across the street,that seems to be heading into a more than friends relationship. I've had a huge crush on him from the...
A. 6 October 2015: I don't think Andy is straight. He's at least bi. A lot of straight guys I know have a bit of homophobia in them and there's no way one of them would say love you and wants to have sex with you. I think you should end it with your partner but not ... (read in full...)
He feels there is no spark and he just wants to be alone to find himself. How should I act towards him? Has he moved on?
Q. Hey everyone! I hope you could put some light into my situation. I started dating my coworker at work, in the beginning it was all perfect, i felt pursued he was so charming and really swept me off my feet. We went on many dates together and spen...
A. 6 October 2015: You were his rebound and he's not over his ex. His intention to date you was to gain confidence and to know that someone wants him. Also to distract himself from the pain of break up. Once he got what he wants there's no love to keep it together. ... (read in full...)
Why will my boyfriend not say anything bad about this one particular ex?
Q. I have recently gained some weight and it's making me feel quite uncomfortable. My boyfriend always compliments me even when I look like a walking dead extra or my hairs a mess. Well he basically compliments me every time I see him. I asked him ...
A. 4 October 2015: If you are implying he still has feelings for her, you are probably right. People in love would stop being shallow. He sounds disrespectful to women, with his choice of words regarding women's often imperfect bellies. In a relationship I would ... (read in full...)
I want us to return to being just friends. I've apologized. Yet despite that why is she distancing herself from me?
Q. I have a very close friend (a girl) who I have known for almost 6 years now. During the time that I have known her I watched her grow and mature into the young adult she is now. I find her to be attractive and I am especially attracted to her body...
A. 4 October 2015: It's not as casual as you think, like you are pulling out of a business deal, then it's all cool. Women feel cheapened when they are seen as sex objects. You could try to take back what you said, but the friendship has changed. Whenever she sees you ... (read in full...)
If I conceive a child could the child be similarly afflicted with the same conditions, as detailed, and already evident amongst family members?
Q. Please help. I don't know how to make a very important decision - to have or not to have a child. My partner of many years, who I am very happy with, is happy either way. He, and myself, have done plenty of research and we're very aware of...
A. 4 October 2015: I know you've been collecting answers for a few months now. What you would be getting is a mixture of, yes have it, no don't, or this is your decision.
I myself would not have a baby. My ex husband was a wreckless, impulsive person although tale... (read in full...)
Why do guys say romantic things, just to dump you into the friend-zone?
Q. Aunts, This guy I've been dating admittedly not very long, little over a month, just told me tonight that basically I'm in the friend zone. I'm annoyed because he says things like I like you more and more everyday and he sent me a sweet card abo...
A. 3 October 2015: I am guessing you came out of a long term relationship and are new to the dating scene. things changed, people changed through the years because of how technology offers easy access to the world. Every one knows how to have a great first date. they ... (read in full...)
What the hell is my life and what the hell is love?
Q. This is more a rant than a question, but I'd love to hear all of your input: I have been with my boyfriend for a year. We live together and I thought everything was going so well. We have had our disagreements and arguments, sure. Just like every ...
A. 2 October 2015: Perfect woman is not brainless and the perfect love is not about perpetrating the masculine/feminine polarity bullshit.... (read in full...)
What the hell is my life and what the hell is love?
Q. This is more a rant than a question, but I'd love to hear all of your input: I have been with my boyfriend for a year. We live together and I thought everything was going so well. We have had our disagreements and arguments, sure. Just like every ...
A. 2 October 2015: I am not sure if he posted the Facebook page to imply he wished someone else was his girlfriend. What if he was drunk and loves to argue? What if he's implying that "perfect girlfriend" was you? Maybe that post was what he found in his email ... (read in full...)
I'm questioning our moral compatability
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm torn, confused, and seeking your comments. I have been dating Mike for 10 months. I moved in with him a month ago and recently found out (two weeks ago) that he is into threesomes. He was invited (8 months ago) to participate with...
A. 2 October 2015: There are people who are open to swinging but would still respect their partners' wishes if they are opposed to it and have morals like yours. Mike is unaware of your dislike in threesomes. I think the problem is worse when you heard that he would ... (read in full...)
Am being impatient? Does he want to reconcile or not? I don't know what to do!
Q. After being separated for a few years my husband decided he wants to fix things. He decided this after I told him I don't want him coming up to my home anymore to see the kids. That he can take them to his. At first he agreed, but then the next day ...
A. 1 October 2015: It could be because he dated someone else and she's not happy with the fact that he's still not married and dumped him. So your husband wants to try your luck with you again. I understand taking it slow but for this to work, the love has to be ... (read in full...)
How doI stop myself from kissing my ex?
Q. I find myself kissing my ex whenever we are alone together. I'm not happy with this and really wish to stop it. though I often hesitate to kiss him, but after sometime I feel like kissing him too. We broke up about 4months ago. Pease what can I do...
A. 1 October 2015: Maybe your ex did not want a full on relationship but would be happy to have some occasional sex while you want to get back with him. You both have to be honest about what you want. It would be hard to stay friends if you still have feelings for ... (read in full...)
He felt me pulling away so he lied to me about where he was!
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm newly divorced and have been dating a man for 9'months. He has been separated from his wife for 6 years, filed for divorce 4 years ago and the lawyers still have not reached an agreement. I was initially worried dating him since hi...
A. 28 September 2015: You should walk away and not look back. I think that 4 year divorce is bullshit and something's wrong with his story. There are always advice on this site about not believing a man who is still married. That includes ditching all man who's still not ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend just told me he would not be able to resist really good looking women ....
Q. My boyfriend of 2 years and I were discussing our plans to go travelling overseas, where he told me we would need to stay away from certain countries where there are "extremely good looking women" because he wouldn't be able to control himself. He ...
A. 28 September 2015: He more likely said it to tease you and bring out insecurity in you. Real cheaters do not announce what they are going to do. If you are travelling together and staying in the same hotel room, he would not be able to cheat. He's an idiot although ... (read in full...)
If I don't hear from her, do you think it's ok to message her again tomorrow?
Q. Hi I met a girl on a language exchange site, usually it's for meeting people in other countries but a girl who had moved to study near to me from another country, saw my profile and sent me a message. She asked for my number and we've been chatt...
A. 27 September 2015: Just remind her one more time that you are still up for the date and if she doesn't respond, then you have your answer. If you had messaged each other morning till night then I am sure you are on her mind and she has time for you. Don't let past ... (read in full...)
Dating, for me, is so difficult emotionally, but I so badly want a relationship.
Q. I am a pretty quite person, so when someone makes an effort to get to know me, I become flattered that they would even bother. When a guy approaches me, talks to me, texts me, flirts, I go head over heels. I feel special, I want to make him feel...
A. 27 September 2015: You are letting your identity defined by relationship success. It's like you are seeking yourself through men. You will not like everyone, and not everyone will like you. Dating is about finding a good match. In our society, being single is to be ... (read in full...)
Confused by one night stand. Was I too harsh on him?
Q. Dear all. Please can you throw some light on this. Thanks. I have recently come out of a long abusive relationship and feel happier than ever. I've been out partying and dating and having a great time. Anyway, last weekend I met a guy I was stro...
A. 27 September 2015: You are obviously a kind hearted woman and you are projecting your sensitivities onto him, which in reality he has none. He's probably not giving much thought and moving on with life. I don' think all one night stands are trashy but with this one, ... (read in full...)
What can I do? I'm bored with the lifestyle my boyfriend wants to live
Q. Hi there :) So I've been with my boyfriend for over five years, half of which time he was in the military and we had a long distanced relationship. We both worked hard on our relationship, spending time together when he was home, and our plan was ...
A. 26 September 2015: I would be more bothered that he said FU than the boredom issue. He also doesn't care about your happiness. He's a prime example of how people change after they get what they want. Maybe he's doing you a favour by not proposing. You would be ... (read in full...)
Should I cut contact with my ex? I'm worried about my new boyfriend
Q. I've met and am in a new relationship with the most amazing, incredible man I have ever known. We both make each other very happy indeed and already have very strong feelings for one another. I feel very relaxed and comfortable around him and he is ...
A. 26 September 2015: Are you sure your other 2 exes didn't mind you staying friends with you ex. They might have approved of your friendship but it could be just lip service to avoid sounding controlling . In secret they might think to themselves "whassup with this ... (read in full...)
Confused by one night stand. Was I too harsh on him?
Q. Dear all. Please can you throw some light on this. Thanks. I have recently come out of a long abusive relationship and feel happier than ever. I've been out partying and dating and having a great time. Anyway, last weekend I met a guy I was stro...
A. 26 September 2015: All you did was look tense, and said you could go home by yourself. How was that harsh? He was rude by joking with his friends while you were there. No I don't think he can like you and do that. Sex does not have to be meaningful all the time, but I ... (read in full...)
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