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*AINORFIRE

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found this site after breaking both legs and an arm

Latest articles:

HAPPY HOLIDAYS, DEARCUPID FAMILY!

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

23 December 2009: Hey all RAINORFIRE here just want to say HAPPY HOLIDAYS Wishing everyone the best in the up coming new year, Spend some quality time with the ones that are important in your life live to the fullest and make the best of life. This is t...

Women who need to take control

This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

21 December 2009: Hello all RAINORFIRE here, OK Thanks to the Blizzard of "09" i had time to write this. The topic is Women who need to take control. There are many post on here where Females are telling the tail of the jerk boyfriend or husband whose ...

Failure and weak men

This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

21 December 2009: Well hello all Its RAINORFIRE, I felt it is about time I jump into the mix. I have something to talk about, Men who are weak Cheating seems to be a huge issue it always has in relationships then there's the porn, post after post wives ...

1234567891011Next > [24 pages, 930 answers]

At 15 why is it so wrong to flirt with guys if I only want it to stay at the friend level? And why is it difficult to make friends with guys?

Q.   I've seen a few posts in here about people who were taken the wrong way or who accidentally led guys on. It seems like most of you aunts and uncles think that flirting/hanging out one-on-one is leading a guy on (this happens to me ALL the time!) ...

A.   11 March 2014: These are great answers starting to make me think that i flirt to much. i dont do it on purpose but maybe thats why some women dont like me.i agree with the responses for guys and girls to be friends it has to be a brother sister relationship.And ... (read in full...)

How do I overcome my desire to have a baby?

Q.   Hi Okay so I am nearly 21 years old. I really want a baby- I know yes this is not the right time or nevermind timing I have no boyfriend either! I only work 20 hours a week so not enough income either and I live with my parents. I just d...

A.   11 March 2014: You dont have to ovr come the desire to have a baby just put your self in a position where you can afford one.And dont act on your desire till you hav th mans to support yourself and a child.Its natural for a woman to want a baby so the desire is ... (read in full...)

How can I help him feel comfortable with physical contact?

Q.   I'm in love with a guy who is around 4 years older than me, which (considering my own age), is a difference blatantly big enough to make some people care about my 'safety', and just the general 'its wrong' that I get from some 'friends'. Okay, maybe ...

A.   23 November 2013: dont force him if you care about him wait untill he is ready plus you could get him into trouble... (read in full...)

Why do I attract more attention from guys when I am travelling, but not when I am in my own country?

Q.   My questions is why do attract more attention from guys when I am travelling, but not when I am in my country? I travel a lot:3 months out of the year. Sometimes it's for work but also for pleasure. I am always looking forward to my trips because...

A.   26 August 2013: i would be curious to know your ethnicity and what countries youve been to. i think it could be because the guys think because your a foreigner your more open to a date and not taken. actually i have experience with this lots of foreigners co... (read in full...)

Disrespectful daughter is on the streets now she wants to come home should I let her come back?

Q.   Dear Cupid,I am a very blessed single parent of two girls and one boy my son is the baby .All of my children are grown .But my second oldest daughter we have been at each other throats everyday since she got her period we have been in to it every ...

A.   26 August 2013: i dont think you should risk it if you get put out then you cant help her or your other kids. She has to show shes willing to change with action.. 1 i would have her submit to a drug test 2 leave the dead beat shes with 3 do something to better ... (read in full...)

My remarks were intended to build her up but she's told me they were inappropriate

Q.   I'll try to make this fairly quick. I've always been the kind of guy who's really tactful and good with words. I've always prided myself on knowing what to say and having good social skills. But lately, my girlfriend has been making me feel pretty ...

A.   31 May 2013: Also people with mental disorders start to make the the people around them feel like the crazy one you need to get out while you can.... (read in full...)

My remarks were intended to build her up but she's told me they were inappropriate

Q.   I'll try to make this fairly quick. I've always been the kind of guy who's really tactful and good with words. I've always prided myself on knowing what to say and having good social skills. But lately, my girlfriend has been making me feel pretty ...

A.   31 May 2013: your GF has issues she needs a professional.. you cant help her i would not date a girl with those types of problems its just going to wear you out having to walk on eggshells all the time.. eating disorders are a mental problem. ... (read in full...)

How do I get the courage to ask a coworker out (on a date)?

Q.   I'm attracted to a girl I work with and have seen her out of work socially a few times and we get along great, have a lot of fun and seem to genuinely enjoy each other's company. Anyway I've decided after a lot of deliberation that I'd like to at ...

A.   31 May 2013: work and pleasure dont mix find another girl one that wont end up being your boss... (read in full...)

Are most young guys in relationships really committed to their girlfriends nowadays?

Q.   Quite a few close male friends I know in relationships don't actually seem to care about their girlfriends all that much. Or they do, but they see her as a temporary thing, and merely a girl of convenience for sex and companionship rather than ...

A.   31 May 2013: You ask an interesting question op. To me women are like cars it doesn't matter how nice your Ferrari is an how much you like it a Lamborghini will still grab your attention. Men like variety and are always on the look out for the next new thi... (read in full...)

How to cope with moving in with a SO.

Q.   Dear aunts and uncles, I made the grave mistake of moving in with my boyfriend. In my defence, he seemed like a solid, responsible guy, and he is! He currently carries most of our financial burden. Since he is working, and I am looking for a job so...

A.   31 May 2013: He's A manipulative controlling jerk its sad that its guys like that that always get the women. You need to start doing for you, get a job any job so you can be financially independent its easy for women to get jobs so just get out there and lo... (read in full...)

Distressing personal comments from my Gf :( I have told her that these comments, or jokes, are making me insecure. How do I respond when she says it's just a joke?

Q.   I have been dating my lovely girlfriend for 2 year now. We recently began having sex, both our first times. I am just above average in penis length according to many quoted sites. However she has made a few comments that have seriously den...

A.   22 May 2013: She's testing you...and she doesnt respect your mandood.she just sees you as the boy she's been dating for like forever. and shes not joking she means what she says... you need another GF... (read in full...)

What do you think? Why does he choose to talk to me about girls he thinks are hot? It makes me uncomfortable.What to do?

Q.   My boyfriend seems to be really comfortable talking about how some girls are hot. It makes me feel really uncomfortable and puts the thought in my head that he might go after another girl. Am I overreacting? Also yesterday, he mentioned ...

A.   22 May 2013: he doesnt love you,your just something to occupy his time..hes probably not planning a future with you. or because hes just a guy a dumb insensitive one.. solution none... (read in full...)

What should I do? But I have never felt so lonely in my entire life

Q.   In Janurary I moved interstate to try something new, and to live with my mum for awhile. I left a few extremely close friends, a boyfriend, and a part-time promotions/modelling job to come up here and give it a try. I've found a full-time job, w...

A.   22 May 2013: sometimes you have to do whats in your best interest,,not what makes you happy.besides how long does happiness last...a week a month. what are your plans and goals for life? focus on that... (read in full...)

Am I thinking right for a guy my age? Have I wasted my youth? Am I missing opportunities to meet girls?

Q.   This may be daft a question but well I've had like 4 sexual partners from about 16-21 I'm now 25.. So that's 4 sexual partners in 9 years one relationship lasted 4 years and I got hurt in the end (a lot was my fault). I've been single for these...

A.   22 May 2013: WOW! I think you should be more concerned with your overall future, Career,Finances,Education etc. In my experience you will never have enough and all things will be a disappointment. But if you have an education and some money saved up all... (read in full...)

How can I get the confidence to do more things without feeling guilty? And any suggestions on how to end my relationship and not feel like I'm dropping in a hole of being alone forever?!

Q.   Hi Aunts and Uncles :) This may be a little long but I could really do with some help. I am a single 24 year old female, would describe myself as being attractive,easy going,hardworking and loyal amongst many other things. Not meaning to sou...

A.   22 May 2013: Stick to your plan, save your money. Look into investment accounts your money will add up faster and its harder to spend.make your self a budget. and if you work hard and earn dont be afraid to spend on your self some It sounds to me like you need... (read in full...)

Grass isn't green on any side it seems... 

Q.   So here is my Story, I am in school for Police Foundation and I would one day like to become a cop. I met this girl in my college that seems to also be going for the same thing i am in seeming we are in the same classes. So we start to talk and it ...

A.   19 May 2013: she will always love the drugs more then you... (read in full...)

I feel depressed and lonely because I don't have a girlfriend to cuddle with!

Q.   Every day i try to look for some good girls to date and that im interested in,but every body is taken. Some girls just not attracted to me at all. All my friends have GFs but me. Last week i went to my friend house and his GF came over and they was ...

A.   26 September 2012: yeah i know how you feel i got no love in HS everyone had sombody except me luckily i realised HS was the last place to start a relation ship between raging hormones homework and bullies it just wasnt a good time. really how many HS relation ships ... (read in full...)

Why does he get an iPad? It's not fair!

Q.   Today I came home from school and found my little brother with a brand-new iPad. I am so freakin jealous of him! My parents said its only "because he needs a certain app for social skills." (he has aspergers so he needs help) I still don't ...

A.   26 September 2012: "Honey, not to be rude.. but you sound like a spoiled brat." to quote honeypie. Your brother has a disability he has special needs to help him develop to his full potential..the ipad app may be able to help him in that struggle...what do you need... (read in full...)

Should I get mad at my husband if he doesn't loan my parents money?

Q.   My husband and i have a savings account but he puts in the money but its for our future home, my parents need to barrow money and will give it back in 3 months and i know we have the amount they are looking for, my dad asked my husband and my ...

A.   26 September 2012: never loan money neverrr... (read in full...)

If he doesn't want me to express my feelings to him on Facebook, is that a bad sign?

Q.   I broke up with my ex fiance because he has anger problem,he cuss on mevery much when we dispute and he get overly jealous over stupid things. We back together few days ago and he start going to a therapist because he know he has a problem. Last ...

A.   17 August 2012: hmmmm interesting... i dont think this guy is all that into you.. i hate when my GF says she loves me blah blah blah because guess what i dont love her.... (read in full...)

Is she being selfish and inconsiderate, or am I the jerk for feeling this way?

Q.   My Gf of about 6 months is starting to get on my nerves..im so tired the relationship is like a full time job with no day off... i do whatever she ask from babysiting her young child to taking her to work and other places she needs to go.Movi...

A.   17 August 2012: if you want to be with her try and get her on board if she cant then you gotta move shes dead weight. ... (read in full...)

Why would he secretly hide his condoms from me?

Q.   My boyfriend and I haven't used condoms for several months. When I initially switched birth control methods we used a condom and he told me where he keeps them (hidden from his 10-year old son). Yesterday I noticed he rearranged his room and was ...

A.   17 August 2012: get solid evidence before confronting him.. you should consider professional help...its important to kno what your partners doing for your own health.... (read in full...)

Is he playing the sympathy card with me so he doesn't have to pay up?

Q.   ok venting time i hope they allow this because this is the only site there is to get answers and vent. so my husband you all know him the 48 year old that left me for a 24 year old, tells me today (i had to go get alimony, he wants to pay cash all ...

A.   17 August 2012: Hmmm... i agree with Bondgrl you should have a record of the money... and secondly i dont think you should play into his games...he runs off with a younger woman and now he has all these problems and your supposed to feel sorry for him thats BS... ... (read in full...)

How do I tell people these things? Without feeling embarrassed or stupid about it?

Q.   I was talking with my friend the other day and she asked me "what's the thing you've done in life that you're ashamed of and wish you had never done?" I said i don't know because i hate telling people the real answer. The truth is, the thing i'...

A.   17 August 2012: it wasnt that dumb you where young and exploring.. With all this new technology its easy to get caught up nowadays...You shouldnt be ashamed at all. What happened happened and hopefully you learned from it, you should be a wiser and more ... (read in full...)

Does education matter in relationships?

Q.   Does education matter in relationships? The guy I like is a successful store manager but he only went to community college. I'm completing the last year of my business BA. I like him for who he and I'm proud of who he is. But I'm worried that if I ...

A.   3 August 2012: There are some very successful highschool drop outs... like Sean Carter also known as Jay-Z who has a very successful wife who never went to college. you might have heard of her.. also being a HS dropout doesnt mean the person didnt go on to get a ... (read in full...)

I'm open to going further but he won't take the lead

Q.   I just started dating my dream guy and every thing is going amazing! But we have been going about for about a month now and i would like to go a little further with him. But every time we get into this conversation i would always maybe ask him what ...

A.   22 May 2012: The age of consent varies by state and country. its not 18 everywhere. for the op judging by your age it sounds like your bf probably doesn't know what to do. and hes probably a little scared to take it any further. i suggest being more direc... (read in full...)

Why has he not offered to take me out? He's my ex. He'll spend time with me but that's it.

Q.   I am starting to develop feelings for my ex-boyfriend AND I don't really know If he's attracted or if he still has feeling for me. We dated years back AND I hadn't seen him in quite some time, like 11 years ago. He is not married, but he is dati...

A.   28 April 2012: who knows i think you should leave things as they are women tend to overthink everything and plan everything out ten years into the future. if hes interested hell let you know when hes ready dont force his hand dont pressure him. ... (read in full...)

I want to do things differently and ask her out with a letter. Any ideas on what to say please?

Q.   Can someone please give me a sample of a letter to send the girl I wish to ask to be my girlfriend? I do believe she is ready for the next step, as I know I am. She's 17, I'm 19. We've been talking for almost a year, and we both know we like each ...

A.   28 April 2012: Dude just ask her stop being a punk your 19 not 12 be a man... you dont need a sappy oh my bad touching letter. Tell her face to face you like her and you want her to be your girl. its really too easy.... (read in full...)

Girls would you be OK with this? Guys how do you feel about men having strippers at a bachelor's party?

Q.   I am just asking this question out of curiousity. It is for both men and women. How do you feel about men having strippers at a bachelor's party? Maybe it is because I have low self-esteem but if my fiance was enjoying that kind of show, I woul...

A.   28 April 2012: why do you need to stare at strippers if you have a beutiful soon to be wife at home... personally i dont like being tempted or teased, i dont like having women or things that i cant have or arent mine thrown in my face. whats the point.... (read in full...)

Is it normal to talk constantly to someone you're not interested in?

Q.   I posted on here some time last week but didn't get any responses, so I'm going to try one more time. Maybe my question was too vague. I met this girl off a dating web site about a month and a half ago. She lives a good bit from me. A handful of...

A.   28 April 2012: i think you should wean yourself off of this relationship.find someone closer who doesnt play games... (read in full...)

We can't help our feelings for each other, but we're cousins

Q.   hi am female and having sexual affair with my cousin when it all started i was in his home for vacation and we got a couple of drinks and he kissed me first, i was very shocked. we usually ended up in his bed. my mind tell me not to do it but my ...

A.   25 April 2012: i dont think its a big deal your a grownup do what you. just know every choice has consequences. humans have been going with relatives since our dawn theres no scientific conclusion that offspring produced in this way would be any diffrent, but ... (read in full...)

My parents want me to be married at age 18. How can I if I'm a lesbian?

Q.   i live with my family and i m only 16,my parents want me to get married wen i will be 18 but i do not want to get married! i have no choice,no where to go! if i leave the house i will have no hope to lead my life but if i get married to a boy i ca...

A.   25 April 2012: maybe you could give a guy a chance it might not be so bad,if you have to marry a guy maybe you could explain the situation to him he might be understanding. sometimes we have to do things you dont like but its in our best intrest. i think you ... (read in full...)

Do guys find black hair attractive in girls?

Q.   i know this is a random question but i just want to see what everyones opinion was, mostly from a guys perspective. Of course a lot of guys like or "love" blondes then theres the burnettes and red heads. what about the girls with black hair? in my ...

A.   28 December 2011: Jet Black is difficult to find naturally most hair is like eyes at most a very dark brown. sunlight reveals the truth. I tend to find girls with very dark hair to be exeptionally attractive because they have this exocticness them I think some eas... (read in full...)

How do you french kiss without biting someone's tongue?

Q.   Hi... I have problem... I cant french kiss to save my life... I jus cnt i end up biting mens toungue. Ths has been a c0nstant problem in all of my rlti0nships. Plz help...

A.   28 December 2011: maybe your just not comfortable with these guys. I dont like kissing but i thnk im good at it also it mite not be your fault could be the other person heres a tip sit back and let them do it all just hold your mouth open.. ughh so gross. I once ... (read in full...)

How do you handle everyone around you in a relationship?

Q.   I go to post-secondary school with people who are all older than me and at different stages of their life. They all seem to be in a relationship. I feel sad that I'm alone or that I have so many people around me there that live with their loved one ...

A.   22 December 2011: There are people in all diffrent phases of life that are single. Im sure your not the only single person at your university that is single. if you dont want to be single attempt to meet someone.... (read in full...)

I ran away, now I'm pregnant and don't know how to tell my Mom!

Q.   i need help please! my mom and i got in a huge fight about a year and a half ago about her and her boyfriend getting married i couldn't and i still can't stand him..time being she hated my boyfriend to, he probably wasn't and probably still isn't ...

A.   22 December 2011: I cant understand how she let you walk out and you've been gone this long and she hasn't even bothered to contact you since. Im not sure you have the rite to call social services on her you walked out she didnt throw you out. "your mother ... (read in full...)

Have you ever gotten to the end of your teenaged years and realized you didn't do anything?

Q.   I'm actually quite annoyed at myself, i'm 19 and i don't feel like i've lived my teenage life to the fullest! I haven't slept with anyone.. STILL. I haven't experimented or at least tried one drug, something even small such as weed. I haven't had a ...

A.   22 December 2011: Yeah I got to the end of my teenage years and realized im still alive I dont have a criminal record I dont have any STDs I dont have any babies i dont have any emotional baggage and I dont have any regrets. I spent my teenage years indulging ... (read in full...)

I turned down my ex because I have feelings for my best friend, but I don't plan on telling my best friend, so I'm wondering if I made the right decision.

Q.   I've been talking to my ex recently, and he asked me if I want to get back together. I told him that I like someone else and that we shouldn't be together if I can't have feelings only for him. I'm in love with my best friend, but I don't plan on ...

A.   22 December 2011: You seem very mature not for your age specifically but for a person in general. Atleast your not stringing your ex along an you laid it out how you feel etc. I think you should get back with him if you dont plan to tell your friend how you feel... (read in full...)

Boyfriend needs a rather large loan. What to do? Help!

Q.   My 24 year old boyfriend took out a loan to get some repairs done on his car, without realizing that he would have to change his insurance to be eligible for the loan. Now he's paying double what he would pay for car insurance AND an extra $50 per ...

A.   22 December 2011: WOW your making him pay interest im curious to know what your majoring in wall street banking? Well i think you will make an excellent Banker. I dont see anything wrong with your plan you seem far more mature and financially savvy at 19 then your ... (read in full...)

Has anyone ever spent New Year's Eve alone?

Q.   Hey aunts! So, I'm going through a pretty rocky phase in my life (my mom passed away last spring, I recently broke up with my 5year bf and I'm very heartbroken). Looks like I'm gonna be spending New Years Eve alone. I know it's a super loser thing ...

A.   22 December 2011: I have slept rite through new years woke up writing the wrong date on everything the next day. I think your putting the holidays on to high a pedestal. For me every day is just another day bills get run up expenses have to be paid trades are made ... (read in full...)

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