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*adedpearl agony aunt


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I am a 21 year old female living in the southern part of the United States. I am by no means qualified to help people. I do more asking than answering on here anyways...

Are girls okay with a guy experimenting a lot with his looks?

Q.   I moved to Ireland 4 months back to be with my wife . I'm 33, she is 30. I'm still holding Pakistani nationality and soon will be Ireland citizen thanks to my wife. I always like experimenting with my look: One month I will have French Cut beard and ...

A.   24 July 2013: I think you should stick with the same look generally and change it up every now in then just don't change it every day! Women like consistency but also variety, so if you want to try something new go ahead but always stay the same you inside. Ask ... (read in full...)

How old were you when you kissed someone?

Q.   just asking, how old where you when you kissed somebody or anybody?????...

A.   9 July 2013: 16... (read in full...)

Think the best thing I can do at this point is to just stay silent for "a couple weeks" like she originally said, and then maybe try to call her and see what's up... what do you guys think?

Q.   I've been with my girlfriend for two years recently she's been being a bit distant, she tells me she's spending time with family/working on career/etc. which is all totally fine, because everyone needs time for themselves, but she's been seein...

A.   26 June 2013: I think the relationships is pretty much done with. i have been in the exact same situation where I acted just like your girlfriend. I avoided him as much as possible, made up excuses not to see him. She just does not want to flat out say that she ... (read in full...)

Are there some women that just do not like receiving oral sex?

Q.   Hi there, I have a question about oral sex on a woman friend (or lack of). Several months ago when we first became intimate, she performed oral on me (with condom)and i politely asked if i could return the favour. The answer to my question was 'No, ...

A.   25 May 2013: I don't like it. Unless I've had a shower beforehand and am neatly groomed down there and the man really wants to perform on me, then I will let him but the act itself is not very pleasurable. Maybe I've just been with men who weren't any good at ... (read in full...)

I love him, but I am unhappy in the relationship, what should I do?

Q.   Dear cupids, I'm hoping someone can help me out here and maybe give some opinions on what I should do. I've been with my boyfriend for a little over a year and a half now. He has been my only serious relationship and I really care about this guy a...

A.   8 April 2013: I think you should break up with him. Why stay with him if you aren't happy? You cannot continue like this if you are truly miserable. It sounds like your boyfriend has a lot of growing up to do. Reality will hit him hard when he is 30 years old and ... (read in full...)

What do I do about this ring intended for my ex?

Q.   Hey all, I have what I think is an unusual question. For Christmas 2012 I bought my then girlfriend a ring. Not an engagement ring, but a little bit of an expensive ring that has a heart made out of rubies filled in with diamonds. Well her and I ...

A.   27 March 2013: Give it to her.... (read in full...)

How do I ignore the constant diet chatter I face every day?

Q.   I need some advice on how to ignore the constant diet chat I seem to be faced with every day as it is not helping with my own issues surrounding food. Basically, until I was about 22 I had a healthy relationship with food and didn't really focus ...

A.   11 March 2013:  When you live with female room mates, not just one, or two, but three like I did, food is going to be the topic of a lot of conversations. You will hear a lot of insulting, snide, remarks about food you prepare for yourself, like "Are you real... (read in full...)

Have you ever regretted your first time?

Q.   Dear aunts and uncles. Have you ever regretted your 'first time'? I'm a 17, soon to be 18, year old dude that is thinking about losing his virginity. When I hit puberty i never virginity or sex in particular was ever going to be a concern...

A.   5 March 2013: Let it happen naturally, why rush into it?? I did not regret my first time but I do wish I waited for a real SOLID relationship one with an emotional connection not just physical. You are sweating the small stuff. Relax, and if it happens it happens ... (read in full...)

Everybody knew about my boyfriend's pregnant girlfriend but me!

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years and I just recently found out that not only has he been cheating on me for years but the girl is now pregnant. The reason I found out was because a friend of the family told me. When I asked him ...

A.   3 March 2013: You need to end this with him. He's caused you pain, heartbrake, and embaressement. He's betrayed you, lied to you, and cheated you out of a future you two had together. The damage has been done, it can never be repaired. Do not let him suck you ... (read in full...)

My crazy ex claimed she was pregnant the day after we broke up!

Q.   Hello, I feel like I'm falling apart and desperately need some help and advice from others to help me piece everything together in my own head. So about 2 months ago I was introduced to a girl through a mutual friend who thought we might be good...

A.   3 March 2013: Let me rephrase my answer so no one lashes out at me. Any type of birth control is not completely 100% effective. What I was just saying is that the Implanon is one of the most strongest birth controls out there compared to the pill or a shot. Her ... (read in full...)

My crazy ex claimed she was pregnant the day after we broke up!

Q.   Hello, I feel like I'm falling apart and desperately need some help and advice from others to help me piece everything together in my own head. So about 2 months ago I was introduced to a girl through a mutual friend who thought we might be good...

A.   3 March 2013: Listen, I have the same implant in my arm. If it's the Implanon, it lasts 3 years and the likelihood of getting pregnant with one of those things is almost impossible. Her story sounds really odd to me. I think this girl is lying just to get back... (read in full...)

My girl friend prefers to sit on the couch and eat. Will not clean unless I am beside her cleaning too. She's lazy and not a team player. What can I do?

Q.   Hi, so I am 21 years old. I've been with my girlfriend for about a year now. Let me first say that she is a great girl. She sweet, funny, loyal, worships the ground I walk on and would follow me anywhere. And so would I. But the problem I'm ha...

A.   25 February 2013: I can totally relate to this situation. I moved into my boyfriend's home quickly and it ended on bad terms. I will be the first to admit I can be a bit messy at times and the guy I lived with was an OCD neat freak. Needless to say we clashed ... (read in full...)

He's kicked me and threatened to hit me. Will he improve? Is this relationship worth saving?

Q.   I am in a committed relationship since 3 years and 7 months. The first 3 years we were in a LDR. Now we both stay in the same city. My bf sometimes behaves very badly with me because he feels that I control his life. I said its nothing like tha...

A.   25 February 2013: No, he will not improve. He will only get worse. Trust me, you came on this website for solid advice and it is usually from people who have experienced the same things and have been through these types of situations, me being one of them. I have ... (read in full...)

How do others cope with similar? My family gatherings bother me. There is just small talk. And my grandfather's eating habits appall me.

Q.   hey all,I love my family but when we all join each other around the dinner table i literally feel as depressed and hateful as ever (i know this may sound stupid) but my grandad (who i have no real relationship with due to family circumst...

A.   9 February 2013: Oh my goodness! Yes! You are NOT alone. I totally feel so hateful towards my family when we all get together. At Thanksgiving my brother was late and my mother who adores him made us all wait and our food got cold I was so annoyed. Whenever we get ... (read in full...)

Was it out of line for my therapist to tell me that I'm beautiful?

Q.   Dear Cupid, I recently started seeing a therapist because I have issues with my parents at home. I've been verbally abused my whole life and that is why I've decided to seek out a therapist. Last night I had my fist session with my therapist and...

A.   5 February 2013: I think he was just try to make you feel better. I wouldn't say hitting on you or acting innappropriate towards you.... (read in full...)

Why does my brother think I owe him something when he is living with me for free?

Q.   Hello Cupid , I have a question for you my mom fell really sick like seven months or so ago my brother moved back from X to come back and help me with my mom. But when he get in good his help begin to slow down.My mom is late for doctors ...

A.   4 February 2013: No, you are not being heartless. He is a grown man, if he does not want to share the responsibility of taking care of your mother then KICK HIM OUT. He is free loading off of you big time and you have let him get away with it for far too long! S... (read in full...)

My husband is constantly making jabs at me

Q.   I have been with my husband for 9 years, married for almost 5. I'm so tired of our relationship as it seems things are never changing or they will get better for a little bit and go right back to the way they were. My husband grew up in a family w...

A.   4 February 2013: You perfectly described my ex, he would watch me while we were in the kitchen to make sure I was cooking the "right" way or cleaning the "right" way. He would criticize EVERY little thing I did from how I folded the towels to which directio... (read in full...)

If I'm pregnant how do I tell my boyfriend its not his?

Q.   Hey Cupids, got my self in a little bit of trouble and need some Help and advice. I had a one night stand January 26th early morning January 27th. The guy i had the one night stand was without a condom. We were both having a few social drink...

A.   4 February 2013: I think you should take a deep breathe and calm yourself. It is possible for a woman to hype herself up so much into believing she might be pregnant that she starts displaying some of the symptoms of pregnancy that you mentioned in your post. The ... (read in full...)

Are relationships that exist with absolutely NO violence towards one another?

Q.   Aunts and Uncles... Have any of you (honest answers please) had a physical fight with your current spouse? I just want to know if there are relationships that exist with absolutely NO violence towards one another. Again, please be honest. Th...

A.   3 February 2013: Thanks to everyone who replied, My stepdad was violent towards my mother at least two times when he was drunk, that was many years ago and has since stopped. The first serious boyfriend I had, we were living together. We got into an argument and... (read in full...)

What are the attributes and conditions for a successful relationship that works? And what hinders the development of a successful relationship?

Q.   I would be intersted to hear from others on what attributes and qualities represent essentials in a successful relationship. And what are deal breakers that can ruin a relationship? By a successful relationship I mean one where both parties a...

A.   2 February 2013: It's nice reading articles written by those who have had or currently have successful relationships. It gives me hope that one day I will find one. I like the separate bank account ideas. It is nice to have independence in a marriage and this is ... (read in full...)

I feel as if I go out of my way for everyone and no-one can be bothered when it comes to me.

Q.   Its' my birthday today. A milestone. A special one. I've had a tear in my eye most of the day – not because I have reached 40 but because I feel so let down and now I'm feeling that maybe I'm being unreasonable, selfish and ungrateful. Situat...

A.   1 February 2013:  I do not think you are being unreasonable at all. I am 20 years old and try to give my mom a few things she has mentioned she wanted in the months prior to her birthday. We usually go out to dinner too. If I am away I send her a card and a gift ... (read in full...)

I think my girlfriend is on the verge of breaking up with me. Help! What can I do?

Q.   help!!!!! My girlfriend and I are on the edge of a breakup... We’ve been dating a little over 2 years I think something happened in her life because her entire personality seems to have changed in the past month She went home for h...

A.   26 January 2013: To the male "anonymous" responder---She COULD have cheated but that does not mean she "probably" cheated..."she has fucked someone else, it's simple.." YEAH RIGHT. Let me tell you this. I am a female age 20, the same thing happened to me. I went ... (read in full...)

I feel embarassed that I'm still a virgin

Q.   I'm a senior in college and still a virgin. It's not for religious reasons so much (although I am a faithful person), but I've always felt you should lose your virginity to someone you really love and have a future with. I've had several serious ...

A.   23 January 2013: Good for you. I am 21 lost my virginity at 17 and trust really is not everything it is cracked up to be! i don't even enjoy it honestly!! i think women in their 30s and beyond is when sex actually starts "feeling" good. i don't know...m... (read in full...)

Has he a soft spot for me?

Q.   Hye! There is a guy I really like. We met at the editorial meeting (o/t university magazine). We are both a member of the student council. My point is: we do not see each other that much now (as we both have exams), but I really like him. We '...

A.   17 January 2013: That is so cute, "I even have two beans for you: a French bean and a coffee bean." I wish I spoke Dutch so I could tell that joke. He is definitely flirting with you. My guess is he likes you especially if you guys talk or at least stay in touch ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend is too clingy. What can I do?

Q.   What would you do if your significant other always clings on to you and wants to always touch you when you're in public places? It's slightly annoying but if I say anything he'd get upset. ...

A.   17 January 2013: Tell him you appreciate his affection but that it makes you uncomfortable in public. I would just not touch him back and stay perfectly still. He will get the memo.... (read in full...)

What does he want from me?

Q.   i really need advice and any help is greatly appreciated. i had a "friends with benefits" situation that lasted 8months with a guy but we both had feelings for each other. lets call him "Bulk." Bulk told me he was planning to make me his girlfriend ...

A.   17 January 2013:  It sounds to me like he still wants those benefits and does not want you to move on to someone else. I would just continue to cut ties with him. Like you mentioned, he had his chance and he blew it. It is time to move on. He will eventually get ... (read in full...)

I'm pregnant and want to keep the baby but I have some doubts and my BF wants me to have an abortion. Any advise?

Q.   I am 8 Weeks pregnant but I am only 20 years old. I have no clue whether or not I am going to keep this baby. I know that there are plenty of younger mothers these days, but I never intended in being one of them. When I was younger I always ...

A.   15 January 2013: I am 20 as well. There are a lot girls that I graduated high school with who already have a baby and are pregnant with their second. I honestly do seem a little disappointed that they did not finish school, or get married first, but a lot of things ... (read in full...)

Am I Just Going Through Baby Fever? Any thoughts ?

Q.   Hey everyone! I didn't know where else to get advice and you all always help me through everytime so I'm going to give it a whirl again. I am 20 years old going to be 21 in 3 months and I think I am going through baby fever! Everyone is havin...

A.   13 January 2013: I was on the same boat as you.... I am 20 also, will be 21 in 6 months. A lot of the kids I graduated high school with are having children. I mean it is crazy. Some already have two babies. I would advise you to wait. Women can give birth to hea... (read in full...)

He's older, but his financial issues make it difficult. Is this a fair enough reason to finish this relationship with him?

Q.   I dated a man much older for almost two years. I was a student going to school full-time. He paid for many things and I pitched in when I could. I gave him my education checks that came in monthly to buy food, rent, etc. During the last few mon...

A.   13 January 2013: Danielepew, I know. I met him when I was 18 and at the end of my first year in college I moved in with him right before I turned 19. I still have two more years of school left before I graduate. This relationship was a mistake from the beginnin... (read in full...)

He's older, but his financial issues make it difficult. Is this a fair enough reason to finish this relationship with him?

Q.   I dated a man much older for almost two years. I was a student going to school full-time. He paid for many things and I pitched in when I could. I gave him my education checks that came in monthly to buy food, rent, etc. During the last few mon...

A.   12 January 2013: I applied to jobs and even got two interviews. One job offered me $10 an hour, the other was $12, both receptionist positions. He said they weren't good enough and that I need to make at least $15-$17 per hour. He is 45, he's not a young guy. He is ... (read in full...)

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