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... Send *oubleM a private message | | | *oubleM's profile:DoubleM currently resides in Fort Worth Texas, but has lived in southern California (Hollywood), Hawaii, Europe and North Africa as well as Texas. Attended the University of Texas. Now single (possibly forever) after three marriages, one of 20 years. Mainly tries to help with sexual issues. Views and opinions are very permissive and suggestions are often brief and to the point. |
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The Laws of Attraction
Q. The Universal Law of Attraction states that like attracts like; what we think about and feel about the most, at the deepest level of our being, is what we will attract into our lives. This is true, even when we don’t like what the Universe is ...
A. 18 May 2010: Well, I'll just submit that this proposed "Universal Law of Attraction" is flawed. Anything goes. ... (read in full...)
A question for the players....
Q. This question is for someone who has been a player or is currently a player.If a player doesn't get sex from a girl or knows that he won't get sex from a girl,would he stay in contact with her.Should the girl be paranoid if he wants to stay in touch ...
A. 12 May 2010: Well, I just always moved on but rarely had to make that decision until recently. lol... (read in full...)
The Laws of Attraction
Q. The Universal Law of Attraction states that like attracts like; what we think about and feel about the most, at the deepest level of our being, is what we will attract into our lives. This is true, even when we don’t like what the Universe is ...
A. 12 May 2010: Okay, but you stated "The Universal Law of Attraction (an apparent absolute?) states that 'like attracts like' (a generalization?)."... (read in full...)
Do any guys not fantasize?
Q. So a guy (not a boyfriend who would have any reason to lie about this to me) told me he honestly doesn't fantasize when he masturbates, that it's like mind-clearing meditation. He doesn't feel like it's sexual at all to masturbate and very rarely ...
A. 10 May 2010: Who knows? Everyone each to their own thing . . . right? Or as we used to say back in the 60s-70s, whatever turns-you-on! ... (read in full...)
Oral Sex Questions
Q. Did you give oral sex to your first girlfriend/boyfriend? Were you their first girlfriend/boyfriend? Did they return the favor? How old were the both of you?...
A. 8 May 2010: No. No. No. 14 (abt 1961)... (read in full...)
Somethng has changed between us -- something is lacking
Q. I really want to work on my sexual relationship with my partner of 2 years. I love him deeply but I feel a lot is lacking in the sexual side of our relationship. After the initial 'honeymoon' phase, he began rejecting my advances and then I became...
A. 6 May 2010: Well, it's very hard to find the "perfect match," and many men are very selfish about intimacy. Giving - is a difficult concept for some men.... (read in full...)
Where do you find nice teenage girls?
Q. Where do you find nice teenage girls?...
A. 5 May 2010: Wherever there are nice teenage girls! Like, most anywhere, dude. But you could start at Sunday gatherings, town events or artistic classes - as a beginning. ... (read in full...)
What does a wet vagina mean?
Q. when my girlfriend and i have intercourse without a condom(dont worry were adults and shes on the pill, were careful) she gets wet before we have intercourse, she gets wet while we kiss and make out but when i'm in her and penetrate her nice and ...
A. 3 May 2010: It's good . . . it's just her natural vagina lubrication as a result of sexual stimulation and anticipation. The lubrication is produced by glands and released to facilitate comfortable penetration. Just enjoy that she is naturally excited by your ... (read in full...)
Any pointers on performing oral sex?
Q. i need some pointers on how to please her through oral sex. She is a virgin and she doesnt want to have intercourse yet and i want to make her feel the same way i feel when she gives me oral sex. she has also expressed an interest in me going down ...
A. 2 May 2010: This may help get you started:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/what-advice-do-you-have-about-giving-and.html... (read in full...)
I don't want to just hit on girls until one of them says yes, ..but is it reasonable to think a connection could happen naturally?
Q. It seems like everyone I know that's my age has had sex numerous times. I'm feeling really left behind, last time I had a girl friend was in 9th grade...I'm almost 20 years old now. First the girl this girl that I liked lost her virginity, then ...
A. 2 May 2010: Okay, well I'm not much different than you - albeit much older - yet my sexual experiences have been many over the pst 45 years or more. But I'm possibly as shy and reserved as you seem to be - or at least I was back in the 1960s, and the trait has ... (read in full...)
He asked for a bj and I want to make him happy but should I do it?
Q. i have a really great guy friend. we work together, at times hang out. i was in a 2 year relationship but that ended a year ago, and since then i've met a few guys and dated, but nothing serious; my friend is a virgin and lives with his mom, he is a ...
A. 30 April 2010: Certainly seems a bold request at the indicated stage of this new relationship, but I'm of an older generation. Things like oral sex was more often between interested parties in the earlier generations, That stated, I'm compelled to admit having ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend won't let me have it and it hurts!
Q. Hello. I really need some help with my situation because it is upsetting me so much. I am 20-years-old and my boyfriend just turned 22. We've been together for 2 1/2 years. In the beginning of our relationship we were intimate a lot of the time and ...
A. 29 April 2010: He is just not that "into" you anymore, but he's now soaking you for all he can, including support, because you're so in love with him and he's so attractive to you. ... (read in full...)
She likes it better without a cover!
Q. when my girlfriend and i have intercrouse, with no condom she likes it more cuz she can feel the head more and during it, my penis feels like its getting squeezed, like her vagina is getting tighter and such and her eyes are closed and looks like ...
A. 29 April 2010: Well, as others have said, parenthood may be in the near future unless, perhaps, your girlfriend is properly on birth control or you have ventured a vasectomy. But of course, sexual activity is most sensitive and best enjoyed sans condoms. Everyone ... (read in full...)
The Laws of Attraction
Q. The Universal Law of Attraction states that like attracts like; what we think about and feel about the most, at the deepest level of our being, is what we will attract into our lives. This is true, even when we don’t like what the Universe is ...
A. 26 April 2010: With all due respect, I must disagree with some of your postulates if you infer that they are "always" or even predominate. Opposites also attract, and sometimes with great intensity. But I certainly concur with your advice to self-analyze and live ... (read in full...)
We want to have sex but my poor body image is getting in the way
Q. I just started dating this guy I've liked for over a year and he's very sexy and wants to go further than I feel comfortable. Well it's not that Im uncomfortable, I'm more self consious. Half because I'm afraid he won't like the way i look or feel ...
A. 25 April 2010: He already knows how you look and feel (except in the nude, perhaps), and he's apparently happy with it. So don't worry about rather minor stuff like this. ... (read in full...)
Would you consider me a slut?
Q. i've slept with 13 people, i'm 17, does this make me a slut?...
A. 24 April 2010: Well, technically and legally (in UK, USA and the Western World) it is thankfully permissible to be very promiscuous. Whether being promiscuous is being a slut is your decision. ... (read in full...)
I really need help with my boyfriend and his addiction
Q. Hello, I hear all the time it's normal for men to watch porn. My boyfriend won't stop watching it. He use to be very honest about it. So with him being honest I went to be honest on how it really effected me. It hurts me to know that I can not plea...
A. 22 April 2010: Well, at least consider your interest in sexual activity to be normal. However, his obsession with pornography is abnormal, at least when a woman is available. Just my opinion, and admittedly from the older generation. So . . . although you want the ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend simply will not satisfy me in bed.
Q. Hi, I have been dating my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years. We have been reasonably happy except for in one regard: sex. He always wants a blowjob, but he never wants to go down on me or even manually stimulate me. He has only gone down on me 3-4 times ...
A. 20 April 2010: Well, imagine a lifetime of the same guy if the relationship proceeds.... (read in full...)
Masturbation without penetration
Q. Hello. I and my girlfriend are both 21 and have been together for 3 years.We are both vergins but we do oral sometimes. She often masturbates me. I want to masturbate her. How can I do it witout penetration? I have heard of clitorial stimulation. ...
A. 19 April 2010: Well forget about the squirting. Few women actually do that, but check out the following:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/what-advice-do-you-have-about-giving-and.html... (read in full...)
Will she know that I've had sex with someone else?
Q. dear cupid, i had girlfriend that i broke up with. meanwhile i had anal sex with this other woman. i want to get back with my girlfriend, but if she wants me to get tested to know if i had sex or anal sex with other women, will she be able to know ...
A. 18 April 2010: An STD or a false response on a lie detector would be a fairly hefty clue. And then I think those detectors are somewhat questionable. Other than that, no, unless you were doing your anal screwing this afternoon. Partners can often detect scents, ... (read in full...)
All About Multiples (And I Don’t Mean Births)
Q. I’ve had multiple orgasms on my mind lately. Just thinking about what a wonderful thing they are. If you’re like other guys I know, you just may love the idea of teaching or helping your woman to have multiple orgasms. My personal story a...
A. 18 April 2010: Well as a man, I can concur not as someone to personally experience multiples, but as someone who has provided. But I'm a little surprised that you did not place most emphasis on the application of oral stimulation to facilitate the result. In my ... (read in full...)
I just can't seem to orgasm...
Q. Lately, I've been thinking more and more about orgasms. I've had three serious boyfriends, and three sex partners and I've never had an orgasm once, not during sex or any other sexual activity, besides rubbing and I wonder if I'll ever have one. ...
A. 17 April 2010: Yes, you will, when your boyfriend learns how to please a woman, or when you are with a man who knows how. The best I can offer is available in the Web site's archives. Enter: Double M on female orgasms - in the above search field.... (read in full...)
Keep having to come up for air during cunnilingus
Q. When going down on my partner (cunnilingus), I keep running out of breath. Is there any suggestions on trying to do this more easily without having to keep coming up for air. Also, is it normal for the male to have to thrust harder during fu...
A. 16 April 2010: The usual times I've had problems breathing while going down are with girls (women) who are overweight. But whether this is the situation or not, another way to add breathing space is to place a firm pillow or two underneath her behind. This tends ... (read in full...)
Is there something wrong with me if I think about sex all the time despite being a virgin?
Q. Is there something wrong with me,I think about sex all the time,and when I like guys I generally think about shagging them rather than being in a relationship,as I don't really like the exclusiveness.but the thing is I'm a virgin,I masterbate but ...
A. 16 April 2010: You're perfectly normal, but although apparently legally of age in the UK, you're also still very young. Your hormones are causing you to think and probably dream about having sex, but it's best to save it for someone special who really cares about ... (read in full...)
Burning sensation during sex.
Q. hey i had a yeast infection 5 weeks ago and got treatment for it but it still burns badly when i have sex with my bf and i find it hard to sit down because of the pain. it is not because of lubrication problems because i am always wet its lik...
A. 15 April 2010: You still have the infection.... (read in full...)
Is there any way to get over the pain of a break up?
Q. I met that guy, he was so sweet and nice I likes him alot, then he was never there, we go out he dances with every girl but me, I used to get mad everytime, and he calls me and be sorry and promise he's gonna change, but he never did.. I had to ...
A. 15 April 2010: How well I know the process described:
"I still help him and be there for him everytime he needs me, is that wrong?"
It only prolongs the pain. Not wrong, but you'll understand someday that some things must end. ... (read in full...)
Is there any way to get over the pain of a break up?
Q. I met that guy, he was so sweet and nice I likes him alot, then he was never there, we go out he dances with every girl but me, I used to get mad everytime, and he calls me and be sorry and promise he's gonna change, but he never did.. I had to ...
A. 15 April 2010: How well I know the process described:
"I still help him and be there for him everytime he needs me, is that wrong?"
It only prolongs the pain.... (read in full...)
Is there any way to get over the pain of a break up?
Q. I met that guy, he was so sweet and nice I likes him alot, then he was never there, we go out he dances with every girl but me, I used to get mad everytime, and he calls me and be sorry and promise he's gonna change, but he never did.. I had to ...
A. 14 April 2010: Just the wrong guy. Move on and forget him. The pain will go away when you find a better guy. It will happen.... (read in full...)
Mouth of magic or just something tragic? (Bf quick to ejaculate)
Q. Alright, I'm having a slight problem with my boyfriend. We've been dating for a few weeks now and we've yet to have sex...which is perfectly fine considering I'm a virgin. Anyway, to make a long story a little bit longer, he can't last long at all ...
A. 13 April 2010: Well I must agree with the anonymous female that the boyfriend is very turned-on by you, particular when you begin giving him head. Heck, I probably would release quickly as well, although I've had thousands of blow jobs.
But you could try doin... (read in full...)
I know size shouldn't matter, and yet...I just can't do it
Q. Background: I'm a 20 year old college student, female, only slept with two guys who I was in relationships with. Haven't had sex in almost a year after breaking up with my ex. My problem is that both of the guys I've slept with were larger than...
A. 12 April 2010: You said it all - give it a chance. It may prove to be better than you think. Try to remember that sexual satisfaction is more mental than physical, especially for women, and what he can and will do before intercourse can make a big impact. I'm ... (read in full...)
I'm 21 and to be blunt I'm a virgin. Heck I've never even kissed a girl.
Q. They say everyone meets their true love one day, but the way things are going I'll never find mine. I'm 21 and to be blunt I'm a virgin. Heck I've never even kissed a girl. The thing is I really dont understand why. Its not like I'm a bad person, I ...
A. 12 April 2010: First of all, you're not an "old man" at age 21 - you have plenty of time. But why not start out being "nice" to one of the lonely-looking girls. You should be able to find one or more most anywhere, I do. Looks aren't everything, in fact, the ... (read in full...)
Giving him head makes me puke!
Q. I have been with this guy for almost a year and i still cant give him head like i have to my other bf i dont know why, i start fine and when i start to go deeper i puke. Someone help me plz. P.S. he is the biggest guy i been with but i could ta...
A. 8 April 2010: Why do you have to go so deep? I've been receiving great oral satisfaction for more than four decades and only a few women could really deepthroat me. While I do love a few nice and deep (as comfortable for her) thrusts just before cumming, it ... (read in full...)
Tips on controlling ejaculation?
Q. Hi, I'm 17 years old and I'm a senior in high school. My girlfriend and I have just recently started pleasuring each other. I'm a virgin and I've never gotten further than feeling a girl's breasts until now. She says I'm good at fingering her and ...
A. 8 April 2010: Don't be so concerned about this; and your "friends" who claim longtime stamina are probably either better experienced or exaggerating. Just be sure to always please the girl first, and then it doesn't matter how long it takes you to enjoy. The ... (read in full...)
I don't think I've ever had a full orgasm!
Q. I have three questions in one... Well first off I never really thought of this being bad until I ran across a doctor video and someone came in with a problem I have...and after spending time with my boyfriend it does seem to be bothersome. I...
A. 8 April 2010: Well, your clitoris is at the top of your vulva, only slightly shielded by your clitoral "hood" - and all of that is located north of your labia, which are the lips astride your urethra, just below the clitoris, and the vaginal opening down lower. ... (read in full...)
Husband does not want to have sex with me and would do anything but that!
Q. What should I think when my husband hasn't made love to me for months. He has had a back problem for a while yet has done nothing to get better. He goes to work, he even works around the yard but when it comes to bed NOTHING! I don't know what to ...
A. 8 April 2010: Well, I also have had back problems for some 20 years, and although everyone is unique, I've long known that the "woman-on-top" intercourse position solves the problem for me and my partners whenever the back is troubling. However, I don't "just lay ... (read in full...)
How can I enjoy oral sex when he is pulling faces?
Q. I can't trust my boyfriend with oral sex anymore. He went down on me a few times in the beginning of our relationship, and I enjoyed it. However, some of the first times he did it, he made a face like he really hated the taste. Another time, he...
A. 8 April 2010: Well, in my opinion, his reaction was probably just due to his inexperience. You are correct that women have a scent, and taste, that is a little unusual to a young man the first few experiences. It's a bit hard to describe, but can range from musty ... (read in full...)
Guilt about masturbation!
Q. When I was 12, I didn't know anything about sex. Not a single thing about it. After I hit 13, I hit the point where my eyes finally awoke. It was around that time that two guys, two grades higher then me, asked me if I had ever masturbated before. ...
A. 7 April 2010: Okay, I understand your dilemma. But I'm like your granddad, maybe even great-grandaddy, okay? Basically, it's okay to whack-off once in awhile, and following is why.
First of all, it's nothing new. There is plenty of evidence that both men and wome... (read in full...)
Is this sex addiction?
Q. So I think im addicted to sex! Here's the story: For a while I had a dry spell without any sex at all. And THEN I joined a website which is dedicated to the "no strings attached" hook up. My intention was to find one guy or girl, have a little ...
A. 7 April 2010: Well I think the idea from "strontiumdog" about finding a "friend with benefits" is a good suggestion for the time being, until your hormones settle a bit. And I don't think you are abnormal in any way. At your age, your body is striving to ... (read in full...)
Casual sex with a stranger.
Q. Lately I have been having fantasies about random sexual encounters, and it is something I really want to try. But I have no idea how to go about this. I have been in relationships for so long and I find all these men that just want to fall in love ...
A. 7 April 2010: Most any local bar or nightspot should do. Pick out a guy you fancy and flirt with him. It happens every night all across America and throughout the Western world.... (read in full...)
We had sex and now he's acting strange toward me. Is it him? Or me?
Q. I'm not exactly sure what to do here... i've been so into this guy and our little "fling" has been going on for 3 months now. Just the other week we ended up hooking up and we finally had sex. Everything was fine the day after and we talked like ...
A. 6 April 2010: Well, similar to earlier responses, I think that he possibly made the "conquest" he was seeking and now he wants to work on the next one. Understand that some guys are like that, and actually, so are some girls (women).
Personally, throughout more... (read in full...)
First time sex and he couldn't cum, is this common?
Q. i have only been going out with my boyfriend for a couple of weeks and yesterday we had sex for the first time together. it was ordinary sex apart from the fact that he didnt (or maybe couldn't?) come. afterwards he apologised for this and ...
A. 6 April 2010: Yes, it happens. It's way too soon to worry about, and especially troubling for him if either of you make an issue of it.... (read in full...)
Will guys judge me because of my lack of sexual experience?
Q. This might sound very crazy but I desperately need some wider opinions on this. I dated my boyfriend for two years and despite being together for so long, we never had sex. It wasn't that I didnt want to sleep with him or that I had specific ...
A. 5 April 2010: Yes, better men are out there. Maybe two-in-ten, depending on age range and nation. I may be wrong, but I think that young men in England are probably fairly equivalent to Americans, and there are, at least, still respectful young ones in Texas. ... (read in full...)
Will guys judge me because of my lack of sexual experience?
Q. This might sound very crazy but I desperately need some wider opinions on this. I dated my boyfriend for two years and despite being together for so long, we never had sex. It wasn't that I didnt want to sleep with him or that I had specific ...
A. 4 April 2010: You do not have to explain anything to anyone, and should consider your virginity a virtue. Most any man worth your interest would cherish that you are a virgin willing to give it up to him. ... (read in full...)
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