A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i have only been going out with my boyfriend for a couple of weeks and yesterday we had sex for the first time together.it was ordinary sex apart from the fact that he didnt (or maybe couldn't?) come.afterwards he apologised for this and said that he doesnt usually come... i've been with a few guys before and never had this problem. is it more common than i think or should he be able to come?i'm wondering wether it was it was our first time together and maybe he wasnt fully relaxed and perhaps a bit nervous?anyones input would be greatly appreciated!thanks x Reply to this Question
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male
reader, cheated  +, writes (6 April 2010):
don't worry he will. nerves are probably the main problem. well me, its been the opposite problem. if only i could find a way to last longer. any suggestions ladies?????
A
male
reader, Red Green 0289  +, writes (6 April 2010):
YES it happens, especially when the man is worried about the feelings of his partner. Sounds like he was suffering from a little anxiety, which will diminish with time. When I was young the first time I made love to a new girl I had a serious case of "stage fright"... the second time was always great! So after the first few times I could share this with them and the next day, problem solved!
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A
male
reader, A Man +, writes (6 April 2010):
I wouldn't worry about it, and certainly don't make it an issue.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2010): I never thought I would hear about someone else with this issue. My boyfriend and I were together and having sex for several months before he could finally cum. I thought it was me, but he swore that it was the way he was. He also revealed to me that he had never had an orgasm with another girl before.
After he was able to cum with me he told me that he thinks his issue was that he had never felt so comfortable with another girl before. His longest relationship had been 4 months! Now a few years later he still takes forever (painfully so) to orgasm, but he does!
Give it some time and don't make a big deal about it. My boyfriend used to get frustrated when I would ask about it because he felt pressured. Just let him spend his time on you and vise versa, without making it a big race for the "O". Its his issue, not yours, so don't worry about it. He'll relax.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (6 April 2010):
 Yes, it happens. It's way too soon to worry about, and especially troubling for him if either of you make an issue of it.
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A
female
reader, advice angel +, writes (6 April 2010):
 deffinatly nerves,next time try and make him more relaxed,then he should be able too :)
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (6 April 2010):
He was probably just nervous. Don't worry about it and don't take it personally either.
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