Like what
she writes?
... Add *asteofIndia to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *asteofIndia a private message | | | *asteofIndia's profile:TasteofIndia here. I'm 33 years old, with my BA in Theater & Psychology. I suppose you could say that I have studied people and how to get into their heads. I've been here on Dear Cupid for well over a decade. I love Dear Abby, Ann Landers, all those advice giving goddesses... when I found this website how could I resist?? (Couldn't.) I love Dear Cupid, love being a moderator and love giving advice when I can!!
A lot of people ask if I'm from India... just to clear things up, I'm not. I'm not Indian, I just really liked that song by Aerosmith when I first made this account. I've never been to India. I'm not even an Aerosmith fan, really, but I really liked that song at the time.
I've been with my fella for 14 years, married for 10. We have two cool daughters and a pretty cool life that involves lots of adventure, art and laughter.
I adore: positivity, theater, llamas, fromage, sweatpants, earrings, and sitcoms. That just about sums it up... |
|
Am I doing the right thing by cutting him off?
Q. I'll just jump right into it. I dated this guy. I completely fell head-over-heels for him. In a few short weeks I was infatuated with him. We dated for about a month and a half before breaking up for complicated reasons. He said he wanted m...
A. 1 July 2011: I have to remind myself every now and again that the right thing to do is usually not the easiest thing to do. And it sounds like you did the right thing. You are empowering yourself and making the healthy choice. He'll fuss for awhile to try and ... (read in full...)
Should I try to fix this or just move on? We both have trouble compromising.
Q. My bf and I have been in this situation for few months and we are still fixing it. Well the problem is neither of us wants to give way and compromise. He has been rude to me lately and out of my anger in return I'm being stubborn and don't list...
A. 26 June 2011: I think you need to give it up and just move on. You shouldn't need some guy to "survive". I would never tell my husband I need him to survive, because I don't! I love him, and he's fantastic, but I have not given myself over to him, body, mind, ... (read in full...)
I really want to get pregnant -- should I?
Q. I want to get pregnant but I know I'm young... I'll be 17 in two months and I've been in this relationship for almost three years. My boyfriend is in the Navy and I love him very very much. We've had a miscariage and it hurt both of us very badly...
A. 25 June 2011: Throwing this in - my husband is a Marine and he says that you absolutely shouldn't get pregnant because your boyfriend will be royally screwed by the military. If he impregnates a girl under the age of 18 according to the Uniform Code of Military ... (read in full...)
I have found out my step-daughter is a lesbian, what do I do now?
Q. Ijust found out my stepdaughter is a lesbian shes 16 and has a GF and apparently has had sexual relations with her. I have been married to my wife her mother for five years and im the legal father we all agreed to that her biological fathe...
A. 22 June 2011: My Mom is a Christian minister in a welcoming and affirming church, so I guess I kind of straddle both sides here. I come from a church where there is (our interpretation) of Gods love available and radiant to everybody. The GLBT community are ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's co-worker offered to help us move. I don't want this convicted felon co-worker near me. Am I being unreasonable?
Q. My Boyfriend is moving out of his apartment next week and told me today that a coworker has offered to help us move. The coworker is a convicted child molester. He molested and abused a 5 year old child. I sincerely do not want to be around thi...
A. 19 June 2011: I think we have a What Would Jesus Do question here... I can completely understand your reservations about this guy. I'd feel icky too.
However, I agree - I think this is a challenge for you. There are people out there who have made huge mistakes... (read in full...)
Is he gay or just freaky?
Q. I have a friend that is ashamed to get on here and ask a question. I told her that no one would know her. LOL Anyway she has been dating this guy for about 6 months with no sex involved until last night. They were fooling around first and then ...
A. 11 June 2011: He doesn't sound necessarily gay. A lot of guys are into backdoor action - the make G-spot is back there and can be a surprisingly awesome sensation for guys. So maybe she just blew his mind in a new way. I'd tell your friend to stick with him for a ... (read in full...)
I asked a girl out and now she has told everyone at school I'm a lesbian!
Q. yesterday , i asked this girl out, im a girl too and im lesbian shes bi or something, i asked her in private and she was like maybe, no then now its maybe. im not openly gay yet and only my frends know. but today everyone found out,because the girl...
A. 11 June 2011: Hey sweet,
Welcome to high school - gossip is rampant and people love to talk. The best thing you can do, as everyone else said, is face this as the strongest YOU you can be. You may secretly be a role model for someone else and not even know it.... (read in full...)
How can I make my parents see I am more responsible now I have a baby?
Q. If your 16 and have a baby, that makes you somewhat more mature right? My parents still treat me like a kid although I am one I had to grow up fast. They don't think me and the babies father can make doctors appointments and do other things for our ...
A. 11 June 2011: This is just their way of loving you and the baby, by trying to take extra good care of you both. Yes, you may be annoyed, but use that maturity to see that your parents are simply trying to do what is best for you both. You have a lot of growing up ... (read in full...)
Can a girl get pregnant from this?
Q. Can a girl get pregnant just by inserting tip of the penis without a condom and cumming outside the vagina?...
A. 3 June 2011: Yes indeedy!! Time to get to the doctor...... (read in full...)
I really want this to work and need some dating advice
Q. hi ive got my first date tomorrow with a girl who i really like and she really likes me too. i thought about buying her some flowers for when we meet up. were going to the cinema to see a movie and maybe get something to eat before. i've pla...
A. 3 June 2011: Don't turn this date into a scientific project! The key to a good date is to be attentive to the vibes and natural progression of things. Let what happens, happen. At the beginning of the date, you'll feel whether the moment calls for a hug or a ... (read in full...)
My best friend is stealing my ideas...including the one about the tattoo that I've always wanted!!
Q. Basically the question is, am I making a bigger deal of this than I should. Here's the situation: So, I've always wanted at least one or two small tattoos. That's it. But I'm not going to get them until I'm older. So what I did was I took ...
A. 23 May 2011: I think you are. But, I also understand why you're completely annoyed. She sounds kind of annoying.
I would think of yourself as a tattoo designer. She loves your design and wants to put it on her body. To her it will have an entirely separate... (read in full...)
He keeps saying he wants to be with me but then he gives an impression that he wishes he had never met me!
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been going out a little while and he seemed happy enough, a few days ago he suddenly said he was not longer happy, so we decided to meet up and talk about it, we then decided it was in our best interest to take it slowly, ...
A. 16 May 2011: He wants space? Fine. That will be best for you, anyways. Just take a break from him until this part of university is over. Redirect all that emotional energy into your school work and do ridiculously well. You will prove something to yourself, you ... (read in full...)
We are having huge issues lately, could this be because he is cheating on me with a girl?
Q. Dear Cupid, My boyfriend and i have been having HUGE issues lately, I really don't know why they started, the things he does are kinda making me mad though. He gets mad over every little thing i do wrong, he is always angry, he has been ignoring...
A. 16 May 2011: It sounds like there's a big issue between the two of you or going on with him, and to make yourself feel better, you're deciding that if things aren't good - he must be gay or cheating. That's not very fair. Don't jump to conclusions!
It seems li... (read in full...)
What is an unexpected or creative hobby to have?
Q. I know this is for relationships, but I have tried asking people and researching but not really had much help. I'm wanting to take up a sport but i don't know what one i could start? Like what is an interesting or fun sport to do? As well a...
A. 10 May 2011: Theater!! The great thing about theater is that there are so many different things to do. If you enjoy drawing, maybe you'd be a great scene or lighting designer. You could try your hand at acting, directing or playwriting. You could get into ... (read in full...)
How can I bring us back to life?
Q. Hi, I'm 15 and I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. He is pretty much perfect for me, he's lovely, caring, understanding, witty, funny etc etc etc. But recently things have been getting a bit monotonous, nothing is spontaneous or ...
A. 10 May 2011: This is normal in any relationship. This is when the honeymoon period ends, and you start getting a little bored, maybe a little testy with each other. So know that what you're going through is perfectly normal! Usually it happens right around now, ... (read in full...)
My friend never listen to what I have to say!
Q. Your Open Question: Why would my friend behave like this? am sick of her attitude.? I went away for 4days with my mum it was my cousins wedding.. Anyway, it was one of my friends birthday but I couldn't wish her a happy birthday because the...
A. 10 May 2011: If this is normal discord for her, then why in the world are you bending over backwards to be her friend? You've tried to apologize and talk like adults, and she wants to stay mad. Okay, let her. You have tried and the ball is in her court now.
... (read in full...)
How can feel safe about falling in love again, and how do I get a girlfriend?
Q. I have been having love trouble forever. I used to like people a lot, but after heartbreak, I haven't had the guts to fall in love again. I do want to fall in love, but I am a bit afraid of what can happen along with it, as well as what other people ...
A. 5 May 2011: All of those places. Get creative, start asking around, write to the head of your department on your online school, look for fliers, looking in your local paper for the stuff going on around town. Look on Craigslist, see what classes and volunteer ... (read in full...)
How can feel safe about falling in love again, and how do I get a girlfriend?
Q. I have been having love trouble forever. I used to like people a lot, but after heartbreak, I haven't had the guts to fall in love again. I do want to fall in love, but I am a bit afraid of what can happen along with it, as well as what other people ...
A. 5 May 2011: Get out and do stuff that's beyond school. There's community theater. Habitat For Humanity. Book Clubs. Sailing class. Martial Arts. Bowling leagues. Community College classes. Kickball teams. Gamer groups. Yoga class. Catch my drift? Plenty of... (read in full...)
How can feel safe about falling in love again, and how do I get a girlfriend?
Q. I have been having love trouble forever. I used to like people a lot, but after heartbreak, I haven't had the guts to fall in love again. I do want to fall in love, but I am a bit afraid of what can happen along with it, as well as what other people ...
A. 4 May 2011: Don't label yourself and don't think you'll scare people away.
My advice is to get involved with more stuff. Why not join your school theater or a community theater and do crew (or acting if you're gutsy)? They can always use people - and there's ... (read in full...)
How can feel safe about falling in love again, and how do I get a girlfriend?
Q. I have been having love trouble forever. I used to like people a lot, but after heartbreak, I haven't had the guts to fall in love again. I do want to fall in love, but I am a bit afraid of what can happen along with it, as well as what other people ...
A. 3 May 2011: Heartbreak happens. Happens to the best of us, happens to the worst of us. Heartbreak is just life. So don't let heartbreak take you down so far that you're out for the count. It's like falling off the horse - you just have to get back on. It'... (read in full...)
What is it that boyfriend wants to ask but doesn't ask!
Q. okay so thee past month or longer my boyfriend always says he loves me more. and i ask him why and he said that he would tell me on my birthday as a birthday present. so my birthday was saturday he said he would tell me. so saturday comes h...
A. 3 May 2011: No clue!! My first guess is that you asked "why", he didn't have an answer, so he put it off by saying he'd tell you later and he still hasn't come up with someone. Or, could be that he's just not ready to say it, or doesn't quite no how to say it... (read in full...)
What can I do? Really I don't know which boy to choose and I'm feeling so confused by it all.
Q. So last year this new guy came in our grade. (let's call him guy #1) I got to know him a little better and then he asked me out. I said no because I thought I'd be better if we stayed friends. Well, he just kept liking me for a while. Even this year...
A. 28 April 2011: Both of them are no good, sister! You are choosing between two completely lame choices. Guy #1 has a wandering eye - though you can't completely believe an ex-girlfriend, she might not be lying if he's already getting all flirty and whatnot with ... (read in full...)
What is wrong with incest?
Q. This is an unusual question, but I'm curious to see what your answers will be. I was watching the HBO show Game of Thrones the other day, in which it is hinted at that one of the characters is having sex with his sister. On IMDB, this brought up ...
A. 24 April 2011: I think that you are thinking like the rest of us. At first it's like "EWWWW", but is that due to a social stigma of modern society? Certainly back in the day in some historical periods incest wasn't terribly unusual. Honestly, I guess if two ... (read in full...)
I feel useless!
Q. Everytime my boyfriend is sad or depressed like....I feel bad or even useless when I ask him if he wants to tlk about it and he says no or i ask if i can help and he says "no". Of course i respect him,i dont try to pry into his buisness nor do i ...
A. 19 April 2011: Girls like to do this thing called "co-rumination", which means talking about things over and over and over and over. Guys are not as apt to do this. You are doing the right thing by not pushing it out of him. You ask if you can help, you make ... (read in full...)
First time sex stories...?
Q. What was your first time having sex like, and how old were you when you did it? Did it hurt? How long did he last? (I'm asking because I just had my first time and want to see what others were like :) ) ...
A. 18 April 2011: I was 19, the first time it didn't work because he couldn't get it in! I was too tense, and I'm a bit of a wimp when it comes to pain... but, one month later after dutiful attempts, it finally happened! I guess you could say that it lasted a ... (read in full...)
Just hitting my sexual peak now, I think. Should I go with younger women because of this?
Q. My body has always been late in everything to deal with the subject of sex. I lost my virginity when I was 17. The first time I ever masturbated was when I was 19. I didn't even hit puberty until I was 16. Whereas men typically hit their peak sexual ...
A. 17 April 2011: I'm familiar with that book. That book was published in 1996 and is regarded as "fringe psychology" - that means it is not supported by actual scientific evidence. I would be careful as to the books and sources you take as truth. Many claims from ... (read in full...)
Just hitting my sexual peak now, I think. Should I go with younger women because of this?
Q. My body has always been late in everything to deal with the subject of sex. I lost my virginity when I was 17. The first time I ever masturbated was when I was 19. I didn't even hit puberty until I was 16. Whereas men typically hit their peak sexual ...
A. 17 April 2011: Where in the WORLD did you hear that by 25 most women have had 35 partners?!?
http://abcnews.go.com/Primetime/PollVault/story?id=156921&page=1
This was pretty interesting. Among all the stats, one of them said that the female total sex partne... (read in full...)
Question about dating and sex in the later years.
Q. I'm a woman of 78 who has been alone a number of years. I joined a Senior Dating site recently. Now, this guy who's 68 contacted me. He is looking for a friend and a lover and asked me if I was interested. His first question to me was I still ...
A. 16 April 2011: Hello!
YES a condom is necessary. I've been reading that STI's are a growing issue for folks in your age bracket! Be sure you are being 100% careful and protecting yourself. Here's some more info:
http://std.ab... (read in full...)
My husband and I are Jewish, how do we go for a traditional Catholic wedding without feeling uncomfortable??
Q. My husband and I are Jewish. A very good friend of ours is getting married - and having a traditional Catholic with a full mass and communion. The problem is that we are not comfortable being in a Catholic church / mass. There is nothing in our ...
A. 16 April 2011: In nearly all weddings, it is expected that not everybody attending comes from the same faith. I am positive you will be welcome to attend and share in their happy day of love and marriage without having to participate in anything you're ... (read in full...)
The more sexy the woman the more likely she filters for sucessful men?
Q. For women. The more attractive the woman, the more likely she filters for successful men? Or does it just turn out that those men just happen to be more (or become more) successful than average?...
A. 14 April 2011: I don't know, I suspect there are all kinds of variables involved here. I would guess that some successful men feel entitled to an attractive women. Some attractive women look for men like that, because they feel they are worth an successful ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend called me a bad person
Q. My boyfriend recently called me a "bad person" and pointed out the many wrong things I do. I admitted the wrong but I felt the use of the word "bad person" was very harsh. I asked him to leave if he wished to, but he said he wanted to be with me and ...
A. 13 April 2011: That's demeaning and offensive. He thinks you can become a good person with his help? He's trying to manipulate and change you and make you feel crappy about yourself so that you're stuck with him. He's trying to make you feel like without him, ... (read in full...)
Suspicions were correct, boyfriend married,and I don't want to fall in depression because of it
Q. Hello, I have just found out that my so-called boyfriend that loves me (or says he does) was lying to me the whole time. I have asked him several times, was he married and he replied that he was not and that he was very happy with me. I have to ...
A. 13 April 2011: Ride with this feeling.
Address any sad feelings you have, don't bottle them up - because then they could grow and suddenly take over. But, it sounds like you're doing the right thing. You're a little sad, sure... but mostly you're relieved... (read in full...)
My 'straight' friend fingers me in her sleep
Q. Okay well, I think my 'straight' friend is a lesbian. I'm absolutely okay with homosexuality as I have many bi/lesbian friends. But this is different. I don't want to confront her or anything as it's kind of a touchy topic, I can't really go up to ...
A. 13 April 2011: Well, it sure sounds like she's at least bi. She's definitely making the moves on you, and using "sleep" as her cover up. Kind of like when people drink a lot, make a move and if it's not reciprocated, they can blame the booze. Well, she's chosen ... (read in full...)
At what age is a woman no longer attractive?
Q. When does a woman lose her "hotness"? What age is considered no longer attractive? I would love to hear all opinions from women, men, all ages. Thanks!...
A. 13 April 2011: I think it depends on the person looking at you! It's in the eye of the beholder, right?
For instance, when I was in 2nd grade, I thought all those 2nd grade boys were soooo hot. Then 5th grade, I thought that the 5th graders were soooo hot. The... (read in full...)
What is college life in America like?
Q. hi everyone my question is aimed at people who have been to what they call college in America. is the experience like what the films and t.v programs make it out to be like drinking and sex as well as the education side of it. I was thinking ...
A. 12 April 2011: Hi sweet,
I've done both community and university here in the US. Community college is definitely not like that. It's a good way to get used to the college classroom and workload, to build up your grades and to meet lots of new people. The clas... (read in full...)
I am being forced to pierce my nose?
Q. I am a 28 year male. For a long time i had a dream of learning and performing Kuchipudi and Bharatnatyam in front of a huge gathering. After long discussions and suggestions i joined a dance institute in Vittakarun, Karnataka. I paid 22,000 a...
A. 10 April 2011: No instructor should force you to pierce yourself and threaten to not give you a certificate. Your test should be on your dancing skills, not the jewelry you're wearing. She certainly can not make you pierce yourself for a grade!! Maybe get a little ... (read in full...)
How do I convince a guy who's been with a ton of girls that i'd be Good sexually?
Q. How do I convince this guy, who has been with a ton of girls, think that i'm good sexually? ...
A. 10 April 2011: Amen to Abella. Wait for awhile before making your way into bed. Then your confidence will not be an act. What until you know he really loves you and you have a solid relationship and you'll be comfortable enough to just let it happen. There wo... (read in full...)
Is it possible to fall in love in just 2 meetings including sex?
Q. Is it fair to tell her I am in love? Our first meeting - We had sex for 2 hours and it was extremely passionate. How we ended up having sex in the first meeting is something which I rather not discuss here. Our 2nd meeting - We ended up chatt...
A. 9 April 2011: Ahhh, now I see why you want to propose so badly. You want to ensure that this wonderful connection will still be available to you when you get back!
In those 4 months, I'd go for the classic romance. Write her fun postcards or a few handwrit... (read in full...)
Does he like me or just my body? How can I tell?
Q. I'm in high school by the way =] So there's this guy or better yet, player I like but hes been on and off with his girlfriend for a while now ( Me and her are between acquaintances and friends), anyways I've been capable of " lightly" liking ...
A. 9 April 2011: I think that he wants to have sex with you. He might like you as well, but he probably liked all of those other girls he's had sex with - since he's such a player. I think you should definitely watch out, because he seems to be doing his routine on ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to fall in love in just 2 meetings including sex?
Q. Is it fair to tell her I am in love? Our first meeting - We had sex for 2 hours and it was extremely passionate. How we ended up having sex in the first meeting is something which I rather not discuss here. Our 2nd meeting - We ended up chatt...
A. 9 April 2011: I second Hugh. Yes. I'd laugh. Maybe get a little freaked/creeped out. Or maybe say yes because I'm in this lust-crazed fog too, and make the worst decision of my life. I'm not saying you guys wouldn't ever be married successfully one day, but it ... (read in full...)
How do I convince a guy who's been with a ton of girls that i'd be Good sexually?
Q. How do I convince this guy, who has been with a ton of girls, think that i'm good sexually? ...
A. 9 April 2011: I have the exact same question. He's a player, why do you need to prove how good you are sexually? Do you think that's all he sees you as (a bedmate) and if he thinks you're great in the sack, then he'll like you or spend time with you?
You s... (read in full...)
| *asteofIndia's friends
These are mutual friends, so *asteofIndia has
added them and they have added *asteofIndia!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
