A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend recently called me a "bad person" and pointed out the many wrong things I do. I admitted the wrong but I felt the use of the word "bad person" was very harsh. I asked him to leave if he wished to, but he said he wanted to be with me and nobody else. I do feel very insecure about him as he has many other women friends who are very close to him. How do I deal with this?
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male
reader, Capri2  +, writes (14 April 2011):
At least he's accusing you of something you really did. I guess you don't share his point of view about how bas is what you did.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (13 April 2011):
 That's demeaning and offensive. He thinks you can become a good person with his help? He's trying to manipulate and change you and make you feel crappy about yourself so that you're stuck with him. He's trying to make you feel like without him, you're a bad person and there's no hope. Don't let him blackmail you into thinking this way.
I'd think long and hard about this guy. If he thinks you're a "bad person" and wants to change you into someone else, he shouldn't be dating you. And you shouldn't be dating someone who has such a crappy opinion of you. I think you need to spend some time independent of him and thinking about who you are and what you want in a partner. Good luck, sweet!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell, yes he still stands by what he said and he says that he wants me to become a good person with his help, but is quite rude and harsh while correcting me.
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A
male
reader, Capri2 +, writes (13 April 2011):
How do you deal with the insecurity issue or being called a bad person?
With the later, everybody can say something harsh out of anger in the middle of an argument. Does he stands for what he said? Does he know you were too hurt by that?
The insecurity issue is something you have to solve. Unless you have a good reason for not trusting your boyfriend.
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