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... Send *ddie a private message | | | *ddie's profile:Hi there. I go by Eddie. I'm from Canada. I have a great wife and two great kids, both teenagers. I've been with my wife for 21 years and we dated for two years before that.
I enjoy travel and learning new things. Different cultures interest me and what makes them tick. I think there is always a reason for the way certain cultures do things and many times we are too quick to judge things that we find odd.
The more places I go and the more people I meet, the more I see that we are so similar. Everybody is trying to enjoy life but we are all influenced along the way by the stuff that "happens". The trick is to learn from the lessons and carry on. I have a short fuse for infedility and take marriage very seriously. It's not from personal experiences either. I just don't understand why people don't seem to fix the problems in their marriages before they create more. I see lots of questions on this site pertaining to this topic, that's why I added this part. |
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| Latest articles: Why do people think the unattached person in a love triangle is a victim?
This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 September 2007: Why is it that people get involved in love triangles and feel rejected when they don't work out? Why do so many agony aunts treat the third member of the triangle as a victim? I'm tired of hearing people reccommend.... "distance yourself from hi...
Fidelity and marriage
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 May 2007: Many times, we see questions asking for advice about marriage, monotony and fidelity. I tend to be cut and dry on this topic and often without compassion for the person struggling in this area. What bothers me most, is the ability of people to ...
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Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 21 May 2008: good then... (read in full...)
Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 19 May 2008: You say she is angry that you snooped. What did she say about the information you found while snooping? Is she hurt because you didn't trust her or angry because she got caught?... (read in full...)
36 year-old woman sleeping in the same bed as her uncle?
Q. what do you think of a 36yo woman sleeping in the same bed with her uncle? yes she lied to me, she said she's living with her uncle in separate bedroom, but when i went to their apartment it was just a studio and they're sleeping together in one ...
A. 11 May 2008: It's odd....plain and simple. It would seem to me there must be another choice. I find it strange.... (read in full...)
Unbearable truth....do I move on or wait for a cheater to reform?
Q. I am 38 and my ex gf is 23 going on 24. We had been together for over a year and a half. Chance meeting at a bar and I wasn't looking for someone this young. Firstly, she's geniunely naive, stupid and weak. I slept with her the first night. I had ...
A. 11 May 2008: If she is a whore for a first night sexual encounter....what does that make you? She's wrong for cheating on you, that's for sure, but the other sexual stuff is just something you can either live with or not. You don't have to like the idea she's ... (read in full...)
Love is not something to base a relationship on?
Q. In my experience "love" is not something to base a relationship on. It makes you ignore what the relationship will realistically be like down the road. When you act on "love" and create a relationship, you still need to get over the "honeymoon" ...
A. 11 May 2008: The spark you mention is a great feeling. It does also go away. That is why all the other ties that bind us together are so important. They just aren't as easy to sell in Hollywood. Sex. on the other hand is.
For instance the movie "Away fr... (read in full...)
Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 11 May 2008: Ask her what she meant by " she knows she screwed up" Then you'll know what she meant.
... (read in full...)
Penis Length Question
Q. is my penis normal it about 7"long...
A. 10 May 2008: In Canada, 16" is normal. It is a terrible burden, not to mention the fatigue it causes our backs. We struggle with this but somehow manage to carry on. It also makes it difficult to find a nice pair of shorts to wear in the summer. We either ... (read in full...)
What do I do? It hurts to let him go. I do love him.
Q. Do I stay with my husband or leave him either for my lover, or to be alone? I have been married for 4 and a half years. I stopped wanting my husband and have been having sex with him when he wants it for just over a year of that marriage. He kn...
A. 10 May 2008: The hope was that outside help could get you to see both sides of the situation. That is the benefit of outside help. If we only believe that our own opinion is correct, we're doomed. There are plenty of professionals in Britain that help people. ... (read in full...)
I was happy with his friendship - I never stopped loving him and gave him another chance, now this??
Q. This is long so please bare with me. When I was younger - I had the biggest crush on one of my sisters male friends. I never thought that I would ever stand a chance because he was older (6 years) but when you are young that's a big age gap. ...
A. 10 May 2008: "Yes, it was wrong to keep it from our spouses, but we were not doing anything wrong - we shared a past and we enjoyed talking about the old times, both together and with the huge circle of friends we shared."..............What in the world does ... (read in full...)
What do I do? It hurts to let him go. I do love him.
Q. Do I stay with my husband or leave him either for my lover, or to be alone? I have been married for 4 and a half years. I stopped wanting my husband and have been having sex with him when he wants it for just over a year of that marriage. He kn...
A. 10 May 2008: It sounds like you gave up long ago and forgot to try and fix it. Cheating before you actually broke up was the icing on the cake. Pain is a result of something bad. You can't suck and blow. There will be pain, it will end. Set the guy free if ... (read in full...)
Am I bi-sexual? Why was my girlfriend so understanding? Should I confront my friend?
Q. Recently whilst sleeping around my friends, after a night of drinking, I awoke to discover him fondling me. I didn't say anything and just pretended to be asleep. The fondling progressed into him giving me oral sex whilst rubbing himself up against ...
A. 10 May 2008: I'm no expert but if this bothers you and you're still considering doing it again, maybe you are bi. The opposite would indicate you're not bi. You need to do some more research. ... (read in full...)
Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 10 May 2008: You do weave a complicated web. I hope your discussions with your girlfriend are more direct. You also tell a story in a Hollywood kind of dramatic manner.
You know that ignoring her calls was not a great idea but ultimately, I ask yo this. D... (read in full...)
Suggestions about new positions?
Q. okay i love being on top and missonary just as much as everyone else... but could someone please give me new postions that will keep me on my toes?!??!??!...
A. 8 May 2008: Well considering you're in the missionary, I think you should be thinking about your mission. You say you're on top, in the missionary I mean, that is a good position to hold. Did it take long to work your way up to the top. Are you sure you want ... (read in full...)
How do I stop thinking about this married man?
Q. i need to stop thinking about the married man i have been seeing for the past 3 months. I'm going out of my mind ...
A. 8 May 2008: Reevaluate your lack of integrity, look in the mirror, realize you're trying to ruin another person's life, think about how lousy your choices have been and finally....try to live by a higher moral standard.... (read in full...)
We are having an affair, could he be really looking for love while being married...?
Q. I am a married woman, having a affair with a married man. We just kind of fell into it and were clear that we both wanted more than what a affair offers but willing to see where this goes. Neither of us I suppose are ready to call it quits in our ...
A. 8 May 2008: You're not ready to call your marriages quits. Why not? You're bumping uglies with another guy !! You'd better be ready to call it quits because you've got everything on the line. Where is your integrity? Where is your concern for STD's and ... (read in full...)
My lover says he wants his wife to know about us but is too afraid to tell her, should I tell her?
Q. My lover has said he would like for his wife to find out about our affair. He is too afraid to tell her, he's afraid of losing his kids. Should I tell her? ...
A. 6 May 2008: You are in a rotten mess that you are 50% responsible for. What you re involved in is really quite evil. Instead of telling his wife, why don't you find a lover who you are entitled to. By telling his wife you're fulfilling your evil plan of ... (read in full...)
What's the definition of adultery?
Q. Technical question - Are you committing adultery if you aren't the married person in the affair? If you are the girlfriend of a married man, are you still considered to be an adulteress? And would you only be his mistress if he supported you in ...
A. 6 May 2008: Whatever you cal lit, it contributes to the problems in our society. You either do good or bad. What do you imagine it is?... (read in full...)
Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 5 May 2008: One thing, based on what you say, seems to be possible. She has been communicating with this guy a little too much, in an inappropriate manner, in a way that is misleading to him. She is leaving the door open a crack for this guy to continue ... (read in full...)
Is eating cheating? As in having a sexual encounter with a another female.
Q. Okay one quick question. If you are a married woman, and you have sexual relations with another woman is it cheating?...
A. 4 May 2008: If your husband is being sexually satisfied, in a hands on physical sense, you don't know about it, don't expect it etc...it's cheating. It's not being honest.... (read in full...)
Is eating cheating? As in having a sexual encounter with a another female.
Q. Okay one quick question. If you are a married woman, and you have sexual relations with another woman is it cheating?...
A. 4 May 2008: Well hmmmmm...........it ain't walking the dog............... (read in full...)
We are married and neglected by our spouses so we fell in love! What do we do?
Q. Hi Everyone, Please help. I have been married for over 10 yrs. My best friend has been married for 19 yrs. We have just discovered that we are in love with each other. We both have children and spouses who neglect us. We have not slept together...
A. 4 May 2008: You have crossed a line. There is a lot of space to cover between being friends and finding out you love each other. That does not just happen. You have to cultivate the situation for some amount of time before you come to that conclusion. This ... (read in full...)
My husband likes porn and I cant help but notice that the women in the porn he masturbates over always look very different to me?
Q. I have read a lot of the questions and answers on here about porn and there is some interesting reading for sure but I have a question...my husband likes porn and I cant help but notice that the women in the porn he masturbates over always look very ...
A. 4 May 2008: It doesn't sound like he has an issue with your body. It sounds like you do. Let's be honest. There is a stereo typical image of what is sold to us as the ideal body. It's on TV. movies, magazines,models etc. Let's also he honest enough to say ... (read in full...)
I can't read my coworker's signals. We flirted, but is there more?
Q. Recently a coworker and I have become very close. We are both in marriages that are very rocky and we are of the opposite sex. I am posting just hear what other people think might be going on here. Before I begin, I realize I am still married ...
A. 4 May 2008: You've done your best to disguise this by calling it a friendship. It is not a friendship. Friends are buddies,pals etc. You want more. By the way, you said you don't want to start or end anything with bad kharma....I think the train has already ... (read in full...)
I love my husband, but I've got my self involved with another man...a little too deep, what shall I do?
Q. I feel completely trapped. I am 32, my husband is 38 and I have been married for 10 years now, and although my marriage is good and solid, it has survived many rough patches and there´s always been love and affection between me and my husband. I fell...
A. 3 May 2008: First of all you sound wise enough to know that your marriage is NOT good and solid. How on earth can you make that statement. Tell your husband what you've been up to and then see how good and solid things are. I'm not trying to be harsh but ... (read in full...)
I'm a massage therapist and my married client wants to have sex with me. I don't want to lose my career!
Q. I am a female massage therapist working with a male professional sports team. Players are always flirting with me and recently a married player made sexual advances toward me on a road trip, and I am afraid he will want to have sex next time we are ...
A. 3 May 2008: Do not cave in to this guy. Document his advances and let someone know about it. Why should you pay a price for not giving in to him. Once you give in to him your reputation will be ruined and you will not be known for your massages anymore.... (read in full...)
Is my wife just friends with this guy or is there something more going on?
Q. I spent some time abroad because of some family issues, nothing to do with my wife. She was very understanding. Whilst I was there, she told me she started talking to somebody on the internet and he was just a friend, so I did not think much of it. ...
A. 3 May 2008: How did she tell you she had started talking to someone on the internet? Was it out of the blue or was it part of a conversation.
If she just offered that information for no reason, I'd see it as kind of an admission, in order to gage your rea... (read in full...)
I'm married, but my true love is back in my life. What should I do?
Q. i have this problem i have been married for nine years now,which were not always happy times. 20 years ago i dated this guy in the 9th grade. i knew then he would be the one for me, but we some how loss contact with each other,bot never broke up. ...
A. 2 May 2008: He moved to your home town looking for you???????? Does that really sound believable? Work on your marriage.... (read in full...)
Is my grirlfriend planning to cheat on me in this vacation since she does not want me to accompany her?
Q. I need desperate help. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half. Things have been a little down lately due to my side of the family issues accepting her. She plans on going on a business trip abroad, conveniently over memo...
A. 1 May 2008: You're injecting words like... "conveniently over Labor Day weekend"... into the story to bolster your angle. The particular weekend is of nor issue.
If the co worker was the one who said..."you look really hot in those pictures", that was inap... (read in full...)
Went to a foreign country and slept with 3 male prostitutes. Should I tell my husband?
Q. I had sex with 3 male prostitutes last week while visiting a foreign country with my female friend. I feel so guilty now, and I want to tell my husband. I know he will most likely leave me though and we have two children, one is just 6 weeks old and ...
A. 30 April 2008: I don't think this is a true story. Sorry but it sounds a little strange. Where is there a place where women go to pick up male prostitutes. Male prostitution is notorious in the gay community. I think this is a fabrication.
If it's not, lea... (read in full...)
What do I do about husbands sexy texts to a work collegue?
Q. I have been happily married for 16 years with no cheating thet i know of. My husbadns phone beeped the other day and i lokked at it ( i know bad move!). Was message from a friend of ours all good. I looked in his out box and saw a message sent to ...
A. 30 April 2008: Don't forget, he is the one who sent the message. She may be a rotten player in this too but you can't expect anything from her. He owes you, big time.
There is nothing he can do to fully put your mind at rest. Nothing. In order to move on,... (read in full...)
Was he cheating in the photo?
Q. Just seen a photo on bebo of my boyfriend on a nite out with his friends. In the photo he has a girl (his friends friend - to him a stranger) wrapped around his neck - both her arms locked around the back of his neck and his arm around the back of ...
A. 29 April 2008: It all depends on what happened before and after the picture. Pictures do say a thousand words but they are not always what they appear to be. It might be a boundary that you're not comfortable with but it doesn't mean he cheated or disrespected ... (read in full...)
What do I do about husbands sexy texts to a work collegue?
Q. I have been happily married for 16 years with no cheating thet i know of. My husbadns phone beeped the other day and i lokked at it ( i know bad move!). Was message from a friend of ours all good. I looked in his out box and saw a message sent to ...
A. 27 April 2008: Well, this is a tough one. He has made a big mistake and you're left to decide how far it went. It's such a blatant text that it almost sounds like it must be a joke although you'll never really know for sure.
Unfortunately you are left to decid... (read in full...)
Please someone help. Because I'm out of ideas on how to get her to do the sex stuff I want!
Q. Big time marriage problems I'm sort of in a bind. I'm 27 now, and shes 26. I married a nice girl after dating for about 15 months. Before that she had no sexual experience at all. We have been married a year and nothing has improved. We ...
A. 27 April 2008: I think the posters point is exactly that.... sex with her is not good enough. It would be good to have some more information about what she actually enjoys in bed, does she orgasm, does she initiate. It doesn't make him an Alpha male either. It ... (read in full...)
My husband's porn watching has put me in a deep depression, someone help me understand why?
Q. I have been married for 5 1/2 years when I discovered my husband was watching a lot of porn. It started when I woke up one night and saw my husband walking to the bathroom with our lap top. He said he had to go to the bathroom but then put the ...
A. 27 April 2008: If he is actually sneaking off to see porn as much as you say, and your opinion could be slightly jaded, then he may have some sort of addiction. If he is not giving you sex, the it may be an issue. Did you say in your original post he was leaving ... (read in full...)
My husband's porn watching has put me in a deep depression, someone help me understand why?
Q. I have been married for 5 1/2 years when I discovered my husband was watching a lot of porn. It started when I woke up one night and saw my husband walking to the bathroom with our lap top. He said he had to go to the bathroom but then put the ...
A. 27 April 2008: You're trying to relate this to you. If your sex life is great and you're enjoying each other, this should really be such a big deal. You even watch porn yourself. As for masturbation, that is none of your business. You can not and must not try ... (read in full...)
Is this 10 year relationship an affair in disguise or just a friendship? Any thoughts?
Q. ten yrs ago i fell deeply in love with "m". m broke the relationship off after six months for reasons i didn't understand. i all but stalked "m" to try and get him back with no such luck. after about 6 months, i met a great guy who was wonderful to ...
A. 26 April 2008: So your husband's not innocent? He met you 6 months after you broke up and has been a great companion and step father. You say he took advantage of you and your broken heart? What were his motives and what did he get as a reward? What has he ... (read in full...)
Is this 10 year relationship an affair in disguise or just a friendship? Any thoughts?
Q. ten yrs ago i fell deeply in love with "m". m broke the relationship off after six months for reasons i didn't understand. i all but stalked "m" to try and get him back with no such luck. after about 6 months, i met a great guy who was wonderful to ...
A. 26 April 2008: You are cheating. That is something to realize. Your husband doesn't really have a chance and he's being robbed of meeting his potential as a mate. He can never truly have his efforts fully appreciated as long as you're emotionally focused on ... (read in full...)
How do I turn down a guy I've been having an affair with? I don't want to hurt his feelings.
Q. I had an affair with this guy and have managed to get over him. I haven't told him about this and he's still expecting some intimacy. How do I turn him down without hurting his feelings?...
A. 23 April 2008: Don't worry about hurt feelings so much. Concentrate on the fact that what you were involved in was wrong and be thankful you've stopped. You really didn't give much information.... (read in full...)
I know I need to walk away but I'm In love with a married man
Q. I have been seeing this man.. who if truth be told is married. I have been seeing him for almost two months now. When I first started seeing him it was just for sex. I told him prior to us being together that there were rules so that I didn't become ...
A. 21 April 2008: You think you've fallen for this guy? Well, I think when you fell yo must have bumped your head. The rules of life over ride your "fling". What you feel is way down the list of what is important in this particular ordeal. When you assume the ... (read in full...)
Sex and Love Do Mix?
Q. Please tell me. How many of you men out there think it is OK for F1 boss Max Mosley to have sex with five prostitutes whilst pretending to be a Nazi? I am getting seriously depressed. So many comments from men about it in the press have been ...
A. 20 April 2008: There are many degrees of what is normal. I believe that when I entered into a relationship my desires were now not solely up to me. I decided by getting married that I was buying into the "we" concept. That is generally more good than bad. The ... (read in full...)
Is all completely fair in love and war?
Q. Hello there! Why did someone came up with the words its all fair in love and war? I told my friend my ex-colleague and friend was coming over for supper last Saturday night she said oh really I am so looking forward to meeting him is he married? I...
A. 20 April 2008: Often people only think about themselves. That is part of the problem that we find our world in today. It's the "me" syndrome. It sounds corny but the world would be such a better place if we thought a little more about others.
Reach... (read in full...)
He suggested that my passiveness in intimacy makes him feel as though he forces me, I feel so stupid every time he brings this up!
Q. Hi, i have been seeing my boyfriend for about 6 months but i have always been quite shy about initiating sex and initiating kisses etc. i don't know why it makes me nervous, but it does. Recently my bf says he doesnt like having to initiate ...
A. 19 April 2008: I'd like to add one more thing. Another poster said "you are who you are and he should love and respect that" That is kind of like lollipops and rainbow talk. Yes, we are who we are....so what. Sometimes we need to adjust who we are and how we ... (read in full...)
He suggested that my passiveness in intimacy makes him feel as though he forces me, I feel so stupid every time he brings this up!
Q. Hi, i have been seeing my boyfriend for about 6 months but i have always been quite shy about initiating sex and initiating kisses etc. i don't know why it makes me nervous, but it does. Recently my bf says he doesnt like having to initiate ...
A. 19 April 2008: It's really off base to say your boyfriend is looking for a "slut element". What he has told yo is simple. He needs to know that your are actually craving sex with him as opposed to only tolerating it.
He'd like to know that once in a while yo... (read in full...)
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