As much as it hurts badly do I need to cut guy 1 off to give myaelf time to get over him? And focus on guy 2?
Q. Dear Cupids! I am torn between two men in my life. Guy 1 and I dated for 7 months then he had to go back to Greece as his contract for work ended. Now we still chat long distantly it was hard and I broke it off with him. We still talk via Skype a...
A. 5 March 2018: It is okay to feel panic. It is difficult accepting that a relationship is over. Most of us have went through break ups in life, and no it is not easy. But the only way to begin to get over it is to accept that it is over. If you still cling on to ... (read in full...)
Toxic relationship with my mother and my family have decided to completely ignore me since I don´t live with them anymore!
Q. I need advice on a problem that is making me miserable, and it´s that my family are completely ignoring me and my mother was all that I had left but she is neglecting our relationship. This is not a new event, this has been going on since I was a ...
A. 28 February 2018: OP I didn't find you rude, if you are not getting anywhere with therapy after two years it might be worth looking in to another therapist?... (read in full...)
Do men catch feelings from having sex?
Q. Do men catch feelings from having sex? I ask because I was talking to my best friend the other day and she said that she and the guy she is seeing, wants t stop having sex with her because he doesn't want to get too attached. she didn't understan...
A. 16 February 2018: I have heard of a man stopping sex with a woman before because he loved her and it was not returned. Not all men put sex first. Plenty of men don't have sex until they are in love. ... (read in full...)
As much as it hurts badly do I need to cut guy 1 off to give myaelf time to get over him? And focus on guy 2?
Q. Dear Cupids! I am torn between two men in my life. Guy 1 and I dated for 7 months then he had to go back to Greece as his contract for work ended. Now we still chat long distantly it was hard and I broke it off with him. We still talk via Skype a...
A. 16 February 2018: Best way is not to reply. If he keeps texting you then block him from your phone and tell him you need space and goodbye.... (read in full...)
Does she want to marry me or not?
Q. I'm trying to seek advice on what to do next here, and what will be the best way to proceed. I asked my girlfriend to marry me about two months ago. She said yes, but not yet. The reasons she gave to wanting to wait, was that she felt she was so ...
A. 15 February 2018: You sound like an amazing man! I really hope you both have a happy future. She is a lucky woman. ... (read in full...)
I treated her good but she ghosted me, I still want her back.
Q. Asking for advice,over a year ago, my ex girlfriend ghost me, no contact since, she didn't even say goodbye,I didn't do anything wrong, but treat her special,what I am asking is ,would it be stupid, in my part to try to contact her,I know every one ...
A. 15 February 2018: I can never understand how someone can just be in a relationship one day and then just ignore there partner for a year and not have the deceny to finish with them. If I was you I would be angry that someone I cared about didn't even have the guts to ... (read in full...)
I don't have a partner, it makes me sad. What am I doing wrong?
Q. I am 32 and single for nearly nine years. At this time of the year my loneliness feels suffocating and I’m finding it extremely difficult to cope with the fact that there is no telling whether I will spend the next nine years or more alone.Given my ...
A. 15 February 2018: You are 32 not 82. It is time to realize you are still young with your whole life ahead of you. So get out there and make the most of it. You are never going to find happiness stuck at home with a romantic novel or film feeling sorry for yourself. ... (read in full...)
He treats me like a friend, but gets catty when I talk to other guys
Q. I've been talking to this guy and he shows interest but then he acts like we're just friends and gets jealous when I talk to other guys, I like him too but I want to know why hes being catty? If that what it even is, ...
A. 15 February 2018: Talk to him? Do you like this guy? If you do then be open and honest with him and ask him if he would like to catch a drink sometime. If you are not sure about him or just want to be friends, then tell him where he stands with you. It really is as ... (read in full...)
We text and fight, then meet, make up then make out! Now he wants to be just friends?
Q. My boyfriend and I am in relationship from 4 months,we fight alot on texts.Almost every week we decide to break up.But when we meet, we just kiss amd make out ,there is no fight at all.Now again after fight he wants to be only friends.Will we be ...
A. 15 February 2018: If you are deciding to break up almost every week, then something is not working in this relationship. You are both going around in circles and fighting over the phone and breaking up sounds immature. Honestly it might be that you are both not ready ... (read in full...)
Should I message him again? Is this a technical issue?
Q. Can someone please help me with a technical issue to do with text messaging? A man who is now an ex work colleague and who I am certain really likes me, but who knows I've recently had a very difficult time, let me know that he would like to se...
A. 15 February 2018: Best thing to do is text message his other phone say hi not sure if you got my last message on your other number but am wondering would you like to go for coffee or lunch?... (read in full...)
I need tips on getting a boyfriend!
Q. How do I get a boyfriend? I'm lonely on Valentine's Day and I want to have someone to talk to and be in a relationship with. I want some pone who is like me and enjoys my hobbies. Do you have any tips or tricks to seem more open and approachable to ...
A. 15 February 2018: You get a boyfriend from meeting people, getting to know them and seeing if you both have anything in common. Now you are still quite young so don't worry about being in a relationship, but it is okay to meet boys and enjoy dating. Just remember to ... (read in full...)
Toxic relationship with my mother and my family have decided to completely ignore me since I don´t live with them anymore!
Q. I need advice on a problem that is making me miserable, and it´s that my family are completely ignoring me and my mother was all that I had left but she is neglecting our relationship. This is not a new event, this has been going on since I was a ...
A. 15 February 2018: The only advice I can give you is to get out of this toxidity and look at your children, boyfriend and family as your new family. It may also benefit you to seek out therapy for the way you have been treated, you may have a lot of built up issues ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is insecure. What do I need to do from here?
Q. I told my gf that we should catch up with an old friend of mine and she got jealous and upset. Ive known this friend for 15 years or so but havent seen them for 6-8 years, havent spoke to her for 3 years! Shes getting married and I tried to t...
A. 15 February 2018: So you told her that you and her should catch up with an old friend of yours and she got jealous and upset for no reason? Was there history with you and this friend? Have you done something to make your girlfriend this insecure?
Your in a six year... (read in full...)
If he was keen on me wouldn’t he want to start a relationship? Even if long distance?
Q. I met a guy back in December in London. We matched online initially and then ended up meeting in person and became pretty much inseparable from the day we met. We spoke to each other every day and spend quite a lot of time together back end of ...
A. 15 February 2018: In my opinion I think he is right to not want a relationship long distance. It is hard work, even married couples stuggle with it and well you only knew him a couple of weeks so I do think a long distance relationship would end up being extremely ... (read in full...)
As much as it hurts badly do I need to cut guy 1 off to give myaelf time to get over him? And focus on guy 2?
Q. Dear Cupids! I am torn between two men in my life. Guy 1 and I dated for 7 months then he had to go back to Greece as his contract for work ended. Now we still chat long distantly it was hard and I broke it off with him. We still talk via Skype a...
A. 15 February 2018: I think you need to let guy one go, you don't have a future and you are holding on to hope that is not there. Now normally I would also tell you to let guy two go and take some time for yourself and focus on you and getting over guy 1. However in ... (read in full...)
Do men catch feelings from having sex?
Q. Do men catch feelings from having sex? I ask because I was talking to my best friend the other day and she said that she and the guy she is seeing, wants t stop having sex with her because he doesn't want to get too attached. she didn't understan...
A. 15 February 2018: Some people catch feelings from sex and others can seperate the two. It depends on lots of different factors that is happening in a persons life. Age has a lot to do with it as well. I say person because it happens with both sexes, both men and ... (read in full...)
Why does my partner bring up my ex?
Q. Why does my partner bring up my ex? This will happen if she wishes to upset me in an arguement or even from right out of nowhere; which can be particularly problematic. I have told my partner that I really dont want to talk about her. I have reas...
A. 15 February 2018: It is really tough when you love someone and they won't help themselves. If she has depression it should be treated not used as an excuse to bring you down when you are already down enough. I could never imagine living that kind of life. Of course ... (read in full...)
Can a relationship that started out purely for sexual hookups actually amount to more.
Q. A year ago I started a purely sexual relationship with a friend of my ex bfs. We had both just gotten out of relationship so we were only looking for a hookup. It was suppose to be a one time thing but turned into regular hookups. They were amazing ...
A. 14 February 2018: The important question here is do you feel the same for him? Loosing a baby together often brings people closer together, it is hard not to get feelings involved once something that intense happens to you both in life. It sounds like he is a good ... (read in full...)
Why if my FWB partner angry now that I told him I am involved with someone else? He is!
Q. Been fwb with this guy for three years. He is the only guy I been intimate with the last three years. Recently I meet this new guy I been spending a lot of time with. We became intimate and I informed my fwb. He became distant after he found out. He ...
A. 14 February 2018: He doesn't want to share you, but he wants to be with lots of different women. He is a hypocrite. Honestly if things have not progressed in three years he sees you as nothing more than a sex toy. Best thing to do is end this friendship. It is not ... (read in full...)
Does she want to marry me or not?
Q. I'm trying to seek advice on what to do next here, and what will be the best way to proceed. I asked my girlfriend to marry me about two months ago. She said yes, but not yet. The reasons she gave to wanting to wait, was that she felt she was so ...
A. 14 February 2018: Her reasons that she gave you does sound to me like excuses, things done around the house and work, you are right there is always something to do and something to repair. So yes those excuses do sound like she was trying to delay everything.
... (read in full...)
Should I go out with her again? She didn't trust me the first time
Q. I have recently got back together with girlfriend after a couple of months apart. We were together for 5 months before we broke up just after Christmas. I broke up with her because I felt she didn't trust me but we spoke recently and she told me she ...
A. 14 February 2018: Has she admitted to these trust issues previously? If she says she trusts you and you want to give it another shot then by all means go for it. But if she had trust issues she must have had her issues and you need to find out if those issues have ... (read in full...)
I cheated and I stay because I think I owe him
Q. (Mod note: based on your follow ups you are in an abusive relationship and require assistance beyond the scope of this site. Please contact the organization provided by the last post. This question is being closed now.) This is going to be a long one...
A. 9 February 2018: I find it amazing that everyone comments on the violence he has showing you but has not commented on the fact that you are violent back. Between you both you are not setting a good example for your children. Cheating and everything else shouldn't ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant with my first cousin's baby
Q. I'm pregnant with my first cousin's baby and i'm going to birth the baby but i'm worried. Doctor says my baby is fine but i'm still worried. My cousin is scared and we both can't tell our families because they're really strict but now they know tha...
A. 9 February 2018: Hi, I do understand why you are worried. It is always such a taboo subject cousins being together. Try and not worry because worrying is not good for you or your baby. Although there is a slight more risk of birth defects when both parents are first ... (read in full...)
I'm happy talking to this guy even though I'm married
Q. Hello all, I am 32 years old and been married since I was 23, I have 3 daughters now, my husband is a really good person and i loved him so much but he has cheated on me three years ago. i forgave him and this year while i was pregnant he was in a...
A. 9 February 2018: You say that you loved your husband so does that mean you no longer are in love with him? Are you able to trust and forgive your husband? If not then this marriage is not going to work.
I am sorry that you had such a tough time with your pregnanc... (read in full...)
Would you date a man you weren't physically attracted to?
Q. Would you date a guy who you aren’t physically attracted to? I met a guy online about 2 wks ago from Tinder. It was like a blind date as he’d only the one picture. We shared a mutual friend so I decided to meet him for a drink. He was nice in pe...
A. 8 February 2018: Would I date a guy I was not physically attracted to? Well it depends on the situation. I remember years ago meeting a guy who I wasn't attracted to but looking back it was mainly due to the fact I was not over my first love. It took a while but the ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants a break, what chance is there for us?
Q. So my girlfriend said she needs space to work out what she wants. Now I know that this isn’t a good thing but is it necessarily a bad thing? Obviously I have agreed to give her space for one week. Two points though do I text her at all to make sure ...
A. 8 February 2018: Okay well she needs space as she is not sure if she wants this relationship or not, therefore it sounds like she is simply not happy at the moment, maybe you should spend some time figuring out if there is anything wrong in the relationship that you ... (read in full...)
I thought he loved me but he cheated and she's pregnant!
Q. Hello this may be a lil not lengthy but I need advice. I was in a long distance relationship with someone I met on a job two years ago, we met when I moved to Virginia for a short period of time but because we were both in a relationship at the time ...
A. 8 February 2018: The thing with long distance OP is that both people need to put a lot of effort in to making it work. Long distance is difficult and you need to make sure it is what you both want and that you are both going to make the sacrafice. It can be hard ... (read in full...)
Is it ok if I want to be on my own? The relationship feels like 80/20 I'm just not getting enough out of it
Q. Hi guys and gals, Just here to seek some advice. i am in a relationship of three years, with a man who i love and care for deeply. we had been friends for a while before we decided to hook up. I'm tired and just not sure where to begin. i hardl...
A. 7 February 2018:
You mention you love him deeply but do you feel that he loves you back? Or he is just in a habit now? Have you spoke to him about how you have been feeling?
It seems this relationship has never developed. One night a week is not great if you... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is a great guy and good looking but I'm not sure that I fancy him
Q. Hi, I have a problem with my boyfriend and I don't know what to do about it. We've been together for 3 months and I absolutely love him - he's kind, attentive, loyal and loving and we get on really well. He's become my best friend. The pr...
A. 7 February 2018: It sounds to me like you love him as a friend but not as a partner. If you have no sexual chemistry with him then maybe this relationship is simply not for you.
Not wanting to have sex could be for a number of reasons, but reading what you have... (read in full...)
I guess she want to play hide and seek to me, what should I do?
Q. hi friends, please advice me on what to do. I met this girl in my working place. she work as a waitress and I work as a bartender in the same hotel. she always stare at me starting from the day I got employed and the way she talk to me. our ...
A. 7 February 2018: Talk to her, communication is the key here. It sounds like she is keeping you around for the attention and the back up plan. That is totally not fair on you and you deserve to know where you stand with her. If she feels you are not giving her enough ... (read in full...)
He thinks I am sick and twisted when I ask about hi past, we have no interesting conversation, its just boring.
Q. Hi ,I have been dating this guy for 4 wks seeing him 2-3 times a wk .. meals out , walks in park etc but I feel bored already because he has told me not to ask about the past and he never asks me anything so our conversation is pretty standard ...
A. 7 February 2018: Honestly if he is this hostile towards you already after four weeks then I would honestly just stop dating him. I can understand not wanting to talk about his past in regards to personal matters, but biting your head off for asking about places he ... (read in full...)
We went a month without sex and now I realize I don't want it anymore. How do I tell my boyfriend?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and everything has been going well, until last month. We've been discussing a lot of changes in our relationship, where we want to live, what the plan is for the next few months etc. Anyway, we had a ...
A. 7 February 2018: Is it just the sex that you don't want now or is it the relationship? You need to take some time yourself to figure out what it is that you DO want. Are you in love with him? Are you wanting a future together? It is okay not to be in the mood for ... (read in full...)
Could my FWB's partner's ego have kept him from admitting that he cares about me?
Q. I've been on and off friends with benefits with a guy for 4 years. I've fallen in love with him and I told him in person. he said he likes me but can't commit to me because of his family situation as his family are not speaking to him. During this ...
A. 7 February 2018: This is the thing with having casual sex, you need to be mentally prepared for it and not allow your emotions to get in the way. It is difficult and well having casual sex for four years is madness. Think of all them years wasted on this guy. One ... (read in full...)
Shouldn't she be washing her hands after using the toilet? Do I ask her about this?
Q. I recently noticed that a relative of mine has stopped washing her hands after she poops. (Thin bathroom door and I can hear her flush after being in there for a long time and then she immediately comes out.) I know she hates hand sanitizer so I'm...
A. 7 February 2018: Honestly I don't think you should talk to her about it, more than likely it will offend her and yes she is an adult so I am sure she knows how to look after herself. If you share a house with her then bring up the flu and all the germs and say that ... (read in full...)
My Mum is saying we shouldn't go to my brother's wedding due to a misunderstanding over outfits.
Q. Hi Agony people. Need a bit of help here. My brother is due to get married during the summer. The bride's mum bought her outfit a few weeks ago. The groom's mum bought her last week in the same shop. Both outfits are completely different. The groom ...
A. 7 February 2018: Was it the groom and bride that had the issue or was it the mother in law? Either way I am sure they could have handled it better. Some people go a bit crazy over weddings and let the small things get to them. Your brother had no right to ask your ... (read in full...)
Why am I always the last to know at work?
Q. Why am I always nearly the last one to find things out at work? everyone knows but me? This younger colleague (who works nights and I see in shift changeover) I have been working with for 3 years is leaving soon and everyone seems to know ...
A. 7 February 2018: Is it in every case people don't tell you things, or are you just talking about this one time. If it is a case that people never tell you things at work then that is a whole different issue that you need to address.
Okay so this colleague is leavi... (read in full...)
How do I work with a Type A personality at work?
Q. Asked this yesterday and no one understood my question. Please help me today. Thankyou. What’s the best way to work with a type A, younger,super confident and outgoing person? , when you are quieter, older, and type B? In a work situation.. a...
A. 7 February 2018: The best way to be is believe in yourself and what you have to offer. If you need to work together with this person then don't be afraid to tell them your ideas but also to listen to what they have to say. Be friendly yet professional. If they try ... (read in full...)
I have first date jitters, due to my acne! I
Q. I'm in my mid/late 20s and met a woman off a dating website who seems incredible (she's in her late 20s/early 30s) - we started chatting briefly using the site and found we had a lot in common. We then exchanged numbers and started chatting ...
A. 7 February 2018: Send her some more photos if you are this worried about it. Personally if it was me I wouldn't be shocked with acne and neither would it put me off! I am not shallow in the slightest. Maybe some other girls are different though, so if you want to ... (read in full...)
He doesn’t plan dates and snaps at me!
Q. What is it called when your husband doesnt plan a date, not even have inisiative to take you out, always snapped at me whenever he feels uncomfortable talking with me, seldom initiate sex and i think he masturbated when he takes a bath? I dont wa...
A. 7 February 2018: You can't. Nothing seems to ever change, you have been giving so much good advice on here from lots of people. Yet nothing changes. It is probably best that you end this marriage and move back home if you are not happy. Nothing in married life makes ... (read in full...)
I don’t really want to go on this vacation with my dad and his girlfriend!
Q. Dear Cupid. I am 24 and need some advice... I’m due to go on a trip in june, with my dad and his girlfriend...tickets have been paid for and now I’m not really wanting to go...I’ll be stuck on a yacht for 10 days, their friends are going bu...
A. 7 February 2018: You say you are due to go on the trip so am guessing that you did agree and now you have changed your mind. Well at 24 you are an adult so nobody can force you on this trip. However if your Dad paid for your ticket the very least that you can do is ... (read in full...)
Did I upset her?
Q. A girl and me met at a friends place and crashing at thiers, we were getting along and she decided to go to bed after they had been out all night. They had to wake up one of the children for her to sleep in a seperate room. There were 2 couches ...
A. 6 February 2018: No it is quite normal, you had only just met each other that evening and I would imagine she did not feel comfortable sleeping in the same room as you. Don't take it personally because I would imagine most women would feel the same. ... (read in full...)
After 2 years together I sense that something isn't right
Q. I'm in a two year relationship and although my boyfriend cheated on me, one night stand, at the very start of our relationship, we managed to work through it and we are still together now. We had been together for 4 months, and he confesse...
A. 6 February 2018: You say you worked through it but are you sure that you trust him? Because going through his phone tells me that you don't!
He confessed which was great, and you forgave him and took him back so that is in the past now. I wouldn't blame you for havi... (read in full...)
How do I establish healthy boundaries with my sister without risking another estrangement
Q. Hi I need some advice on a tough situation. I will start from the beginning. I am 30 and my sister is 36. She didn't speak to me for 12 years which I thought was because of a really silly argument. in actual fact i found out it was because my mothe...
A. 6 February 2018: It is so sad to hear that you both went ten years not talking over a lie. It really is a bad situation but it is good that you are both back on good terms again. If you are still angry then you need to try and let go of that anger as it will only ... (read in full...)
He’s blocked me on everything, do I wait to see if he comes back or do I move on?
Q. Hi guys I need your advise. Me and my ex have broken up. A few months ago Due to arguing. But we are still meeting up nearly every week. He kept accusing me of cheating which I would never. He never likes me going out because guys would approach me ...
A. 5 February 2018: Obviously this relationship was not working when you both decided to end it. If you where arguing all the time then that is not a healthy relationship. I want to know why are you still meeting up? You say meeting up but you don't mention what you ... (read in full...)
I’m falling for him badly, what do I do?
Q. I'm a straight lad who has only ever had hetrosexual relationships. I've recently started chatting to another guy who is in a homosexual long term relationship. Over a while we become close and have since ended up meeting up on numerous occasions ...
A. 5 February 2018: You say you are straight but am guessing you are bisexual. It is okay to explore with different people and different genders, but honestly why would you do that with someone elses partner? Do you not care that he is with someone else and he is a ... (read in full...)
Is he using me as a means to come to Canada?
Q. Hello I married a man from Africa and I am Canadian. We have been together for 11 months and I am trying to get him to Canada. He has been good to me but very dominant and expects I be submissive and do whatever he says to me. If I don’t he ge...
A. 2 February 2018: I am sorry that you have fallen for his charm. But I hope you learn from this. Online dating is very risky because off this. Unfortunately not everyone in the world is lovely and honest, so you need to have your guard up online. It is just sad that ... (read in full...)
Why does my partner bring up my ex?
Q. Why does my partner bring up my ex? This will happen if she wishes to upset me in an arguement or even from right out of nowhere; which can be particularly problematic. I have told my partner that I really dont want to talk about her. I have reas...
A. 30 January 2018: It sounds like she lives off the drama. If you don't want that life then walk away now as she is never going to change. ... (read in full...)
Why does my partner bring up my ex?
Q. Why does my partner bring up my ex? This will happen if she wishes to upset me in an arguement or even from right out of nowhere; which can be particularly problematic. I have told my partner that I really dont want to talk about her. I have reas...
A. 24 January 2018: OP I think you are right. I know it is hard having to end a relationship, but you should not need to suffer this all the time, and well she is obviously not happy either if she keeps needing to talk about your past. I wish you all the luck in the ... (read in full...)
Is he using me as a means to come to Canada?
Q. Hello I married a man from Africa and I am Canadian. We have been together for 11 months and I am trying to get him to Canada. He has been good to me but very dominant and expects I be submissive and do whatever he says to me. If I don’t he ge...
A. 23 January 2018: I would love to know why you felt the need to marry him? My guess is so that he can get a visa for Canada? Did that not raise suspicion that he could be using you? Either way I think you need to contact a lawyer and hopefully learn from this ... (read in full...)
Why does my partner bring up my ex?
Q. Why does my partner bring up my ex? This will happen if she wishes to upset me in an arguement or even from right out of nowhere; which can be particularly problematic. I have told my partner that I really dont want to talk about her. I have reas...
A. 22 January 2018: OP I am so sorry for the loss that you have had in your life, nobody should ever have to bury there child. As for your partner surely she knows what you have been through and yet she still treats you like this. She is insecure over a dead woman and ... (read in full...)
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