My ex is poisoning my children against me and interfering in my visitation with them!
Q. Just a quick question about my ex and my children. I had to take my ex to court in order to see my children. I have a good arrangement now and I love having my children. However I always set up really good weekends when I have them, prope...
A. 12 July 2018: I do honestly feel awful for you, it sounds like she is bitter you have moved on and unfortunately she is using the children against you. Totally unfair and every mother (or father) should put there children before there own feelings and ... (read in full...)
I feel stuck because of his lodger! What do I do?
Q. My boyfriend and I in early 60s, have been together 5 years, but nothing is moving on because he has a female lodger in her 40s been there 25 years! Pays little rent, no household bills and keeps dogs. She wont move out, we gave her 6 months notice, ...
A. 11 July 2018: No you are not going mad, he is the one that doesn't seem to appreciate you or your relationship, I really hope you can find your happy ending.... (read in full...)
I feel stuck because of his lodger! What do I do?
Q. My boyfriend and I in early 60s, have been together 5 years, but nothing is moving on because he has a female lodger in her 40s been there 25 years! Pays little rent, no household bills and keeps dogs. She wont move out, we gave her 6 months notice, ...
A. 10 July 2018: OP I don't mean to be rude, so please do not take this the wrong way, but after five years together if you feel you have self respect then you should have this addressed much sooner. Five years is not rushing anything. I honestly would be ... (read in full...)
I have had an extremely stifled upbringing but I want to break free by going to a college of my choice. How do I convince my authoritarian parents?
Q. In our family, it has always just been assumed that we'd all go to college. I've never been the best student, but I've basically been average. I liked "electives" the best and I got the best grades in music and Spanish. Actually, I won the John ...
A. 10 July 2018: I can totally see that how your parents are treating you is wrong, they are being over protective and controlling and it is not going to change any time soon. However they cannot stop you from working, you are an adult! There was a time where I ... (read in full...)
My ex is poisoning my children against me and interfering in my visitation with them!
Q. Just a quick question about my ex and my children. I had to take my ex to court in order to see my children. I have a good arrangement now and I love having my children. However I always set up really good weekends when I have them, prope...
A. 10 July 2018: Oh I really hate it when parents use there children as weapons. She is a selfish human who is putting her own feelings ahead of the children's! I also agree that you should revisit the court order and have some mediation this cannot go on.
I can ... (read in full...)
She only wants to be friends but acts like we are more?
Q. This is a complicated issue that has really affected me mentally. I've been friends with this girl since secondary school and we have always been pretty close, we got closer as we moved up to college and since becoming close friends and spen...
A. 10 July 2018: None of it sounds stupid in the slightest! However what she is doing is simply not fair to you. She knows you have feelings for her she shot them down yet she is enjoying the attention she is getting from you. She is being affectionate towards you ... (read in full...)
How to save this marriage?
Q. Im currently 6 months pregnant and feel so lonely and depressed. I have a very weird relationship with my husband. We rarely spent time together because of our different schedule. I went to parents home in the morning while he still asleep and went ...
A. 10 July 2018: OP you ask the same thing over and over again and you never listen to the advice that you have already been giving. How much longer are you going to keep living this way? His family doesn't like you, well mainly his mother and sister, his father ... (read in full...)
I'm 8 weeks pregnant and questioning my relationship with my partner because I just found out that he's slept with numerous prostitutes before we met.
Q. Hello. I am 8 weeks pregnant , was so happy with everything and looking forward to the future but now I’m seriously re thinking the whole thing. I have been with my partner a while and we were just discussing the blood tests I am getting for...
A. 10 July 2018: I don't think prostitution is black and white. Personally I don't like the idea of it at all. Now this was before he met you and it sounds like he has his issues. Men and women look at sex differently. Also it is not as rare as you may think. There ... (read in full...)
Should I move away and start a new life close to my daughter?
Q. I split up with a long term ex (17 years) because he treated me so badly that it ruined my self esteem and this impacted on my career and relationship with my daughter. I realise now I put up with his behaviour because I grew up in a dysfunctional ...
A. 10 July 2018: Op I think you should go and move to where your daughter is. From the sound of things a fresh start is just what you need. This friendship you have with your ex is simply not healthy and it will prevent you from moving on and finding someone else. ... (read in full...)
My ex has I have slept together too many times!
Q. My ex and I go to the same college. We see each other a lot considering we have many of the same friends. We broke up two months ago because I was stressed out a lot, and he was too about school and things happening with his family. But rece...
A. 9 July 2018: There is absolutely nothing wrong with you, it is a path a lot of couples go down once the have broken up, it isn’t familiar and it’s what you are used to and yes he is your first love so it’s comfortable. Saying all that it really is not healthy ... (read in full...)
I need help in letting him go!
Q. We met online, he is kind, sweet, committed and just a good soul. I wasnt awfully attracted to him physically but he is the kindest man on this planet so I decided to meet him anyway. I was still not attracted to him but felt because he is such a ...
A. 7 July 2018: While I don’t think you are a bad person to want to be with someone who is healthier and fitter like yourself I don’t agree with the fact that behind doors you are okay with him but you are ashamed in public. Mainly that is because I hate when ... (read in full...)
I feel stuck because of his lodger! What do I do?
Q. My boyfriend and I in early 60s, have been together 5 years, but nothing is moving on because he has a female lodger in her 40s been there 25 years! Pays little rent, no household bills and keeps dogs. She wont move out, we gave her 6 months notice, ...
A. 7 July 2018: Op he doesn’t love you, if he did then he would understand your point of view and he would ask her to leave. It sounds like he wants her there. What do you get from this relationship other than nice trips and him pushing your wheelchair? Does he ... (read in full...)
I don’t have to get married but I still want a ring!
Q. I am hurt, Insulted and don't know what to do. My bf and i are together already for 3 years. Everything smooth and find. But there's one thing im asking him to do for me. A partnership ring. Yes ' not wedding ring but a partnership ring. He ...
A. 6 July 2018: You need to ask yourself what is more important to you in life, him wearing a ring or you being single? If the ring is a deal breaker for you then yes you should end the relationship because he has made his feelings clear and you cannot force him to ... (read in full...)
Everything was perfect... until he lost his nan!
Q. Hello everyone. My boyfriend and I had been together almost five months but have been friends for about a year. We had the most amazing relationship. We both had said that we had a stronger bond than we'd ever had with anyone else. We tackled any ...
A. 6 July 2018: From reading your reply it sounds like you are still clutching at straws in hope that he will change his mind but all you are doing is prolonging your own pain. Yes he is grieving but that doesn’t mean he should take it out on you, he is still an ... (read in full...)
Something's not right with my mother and I'm very worried about her mental health
Q. I think my mother has ADHD,I'm no professional so I may be wrong in diagnosing her but something is definitely not right..she's a wonderful mum but I'm starting to feel very frustrated with our relationship, I apologise in advance if this is long ...
A. 6 July 2018: I can totally understand why you are worried and nobody is here to judge you. I honestly think the best thing you can do for both you and your mum is talk to your dad and tell him your worries. ... (read in full...)
How could my girlfriend move on from a 4 year relationship so quickly and already be with another man?
Q. Two Weeks ago, my relationship of 4 years ended with my girlfriend. i have been devastated, things have not been good for a while, but i was willing to do whatever it took as i never saw myself being with anyone else. we have not been intimate in ...
A. 6 July 2018: Off course it is going to be difficult you are mourning the end of a four year relationship, you need to allow yourself to grieve and process it. It is difficult I have been there but the biggest healer of all is time. Surround yourself with love ... (read in full...)
There's a weird movie-like scenario playing in my head where I imagine my boyfriend and his ex pining for each other and wanting to get back together!
Q. My boyfriend (26) and I (22) have been together for ~9 months. This is my first ever relationship and, at this point, we're going pretty strong and live together. I feel more confident in my relationship that I ever have. Except for one thing. ...
A. 6 July 2018: First thing you need to do is block the ex from all social media so that you cannot see her anymore. That is the first step of breaking this circle and getting better.
It is your first relationship and this is all new to you, I get that you feel... (read in full...)
I fear that he has grown controlling, though he says that I am too sensitive.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years. We are both 23 and met in our first year of university. I did not take uni seriously initially and ended up failing and being suspended for 2 years for it. I was struggling financially and relied on ...
A. 4 July 2018: Honestly nobody here can tell you what to do you should go with tour guy feelings. You know deep down you won’t be happy with him, he has proven that he thinks he is better than you. In a relationship the other person should raise your self esteem ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's close friend from his highschool group is obsessed with him and he's slept with her... And while she hates me, he won't stop hanging out with her
Q. So my boyfriend has a really close friend group from highschool. 3 other guys and 3 girls and they have a groupchat they always text in and are always planning hangouts together. This one girl in his group has always been obsessed with him (i've ...
A. 4 July 2018: You cannot control who he sees or what he does but he should be thinking about you in this situation and he should want to stop hanging out with her because he knows it is making you feel uncomfortable. He sounds like he is to immature for this ... (read in full...)
Why do men want to show off?
Q. I am back in the dating game after two years of not looking. For the first time in my life I am looking to actually pay attention to the red flags(previously when the signs read “wrong way”) I just kept going. I would say I am an attractive women...
A. 2 July 2018: I think it is the type of men you are dating. it sounds like they try to impress you with how much they make. Maybe they feel you are high maintenance and that is what you look for in a man. You might give off the impression that You want a ... (read in full...)
Should I give my husband an ultimatum for moving out?
Q. Hi.. im coming here again for advice.. i get new perspective of what happened in my life. Im married for almost a year and being pregnant right now. My relationship with husband is bad and we kinda lose connection and bonds we used to have. We...
A. 28 June 2018: I remember all off your other posts. You never seem to take the advice offered and now things are not improving they are only getting worse. I think if you give him an ultimatum he may very well leave you. But you cannot force him to stay with you. ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to feel apathetic towards guys after a while?
Q. Have you ever felt indifferent towards men for a long time after a bad relationship and constantly being looked over, and I say looked over because you don't even get close to being rejected. Is this even normal? My whole life I have been looked...
A. 28 June 2018: You shouldn't blame growing up without a father as an excuse to allow men to use and abuse you. You need to have more self esteem around yourself and realize your potential in a relationship. Don't settle for any man who gives you a look. You need ... (read in full...)
I have had an extremely stifled upbringing but I want to break free by going to a college of my choice. How do I convince my authoritarian parents?
Q. In our family, it has always just been assumed that we'd all go to college. I've never been the best student, but I've basically been average. I liked "electives" the best and I got the best grades in music and Spanish. Actually, I won the John ...
A. 28 June 2018: I went to college and made my own decisions from the age of 17. Now I did not have strict parents and I had my own privacy but the difference with me is I funded myself to go to college. If you want your parents to fund your education then you ... (read in full...)
I suffer from OCD and crippling jealousy and my husband's occasional comments about other women's looks drive me over the edge
Q. Hi, I hope you guys can give me some wise advice, because i can't deal with and handle my OCD and my jealousy. I do suffer from OCD and now my OCD appears to have crossed into the realm of the physical too, whereby i get obsessed by a part...
A. 22 June 2018: Have you been diagnosed with OCD and are you on any medication for it? If not then I think your first step is to visit your doctor and talk about all off your options. But I would think from reading your post that you would benefit from CBT. So ... (read in full...)
My bf drunk texted his ex FWB and now I feel like I have a right to go through his phone
Q. My boyfriend of a year and 8 months drunkenly text a girl whom he used to see sexually before we started dating. I feel like I have a right to go through his phone now but at the same time I don’t. He feels terribly about the situation and has since ...
A. 22 June 2018: You don't have any right to invade his privacy I'm afraid. You need to work out if you want this relationship to work or not. Trust is a hard thing to get back once it is broken. I would love to know what exactly he sent in the message and did he ... (read in full...)
He blocked me on Instagram then lied about why!
Q. He blocked me on Instagram and lied to me about it saying his app had a problem. Yes I believed it. I have another account on Instagram for makeup and fashion posts. He commented on another girl’s picture saying “Dayyyuuumm”. He has all his exes and ...
A. 22 June 2018: You are his girlfriend and he blocked you? Honestly that has shady written all over it. If he was trustworthy and had nothing to hide he would not block you, he obviously doesn't want you to see his posts and well he probably doesn't want other ... (read in full...)
Was I wrong not to thank the ex who agreed we would go “no contact” for the flowers?
Q. So, my ex fiancé sent me flowers Monday, about a year ago he left me for his ex that he was stuck on. I knew something was wrong but he never admitted it. When she rejected him when he went back home he tired to get back with me. I flat out ignor...
A. 22 June 2018: You are completely right to ignore him. It doesn't mean you are an ungrateful person, its just he is boarder line stalking you and if you say thank you it will just entice him to keep on doing so. The best thing to do is to keep him blocked and ... (read in full...)
I miss my abusive ex who cheated on me
Q. Now that I broke up with my verbally abusive ex ( it’s has been a few days)who also cheated on me, I miss him. All I can think about is the good times. I’m trying so hard not to contact him. It seems impossible. What do I do?...
A. 22 June 2018: It is typical for the person that is being abused to be made feel like it is there fault. Would you consider seeing a therapist about this? I think it would do you good. How are you being to needy? What exactly where you wanting from him that he ... (read in full...)
Newly back on the dating scene, can I booty call a guy or is that creepy?
Q. Hi Cupid, I have a weird question. So, I am newly back on the dating scene after almost 13 years. I am 31. So, I’ve been going on some dates, and a few weeks ago I had two with a lovely guy. We had a great time, connected well and had great che...
A. 21 June 2018: I don't think it is a good idea either. I understand that you are single now and that you still have needs but having no strings attached sex mostly ends up with one or both parties getting hurt.
The thing is you might think you are up for a bit ... (read in full...)
I miss my abusive ex who cheated on me
Q. Now that I broke up with my verbally abusive ex ( it’s has been a few days)who also cheated on me, I miss him. All I can think about is the good times. I’m trying so hard not to contact him. It seems impossible. What do I do?...
A. 21 June 2018: It is okay to miss someone. It would be strange if you didn't. It has only been a few days, but as cliche as it sounds time will make it easier. It might seem impossible at the moment to stay away from him but you need to remember why you finished ... (read in full...)
I hate my boyfriend’s best friend and don’t want him at my wedding!
Q. I got engaged to my boyfriend and we are currently planning the wedding, making guest lists etc. My partner wishes to invite his best friend to the wedding. The thing is i can’t stand being in the same room as my fiancées best friend as he severely ...
A. 20 June 2018: You need to talk to your boyfriend and tell him how it would make you feel if his friend was part of the wedding. If he is a bully then your husband to be should 100% take your side. If he doesn't then I would postpone the marriage until you are ... (read in full...)
All the staring, sexual tension and then ignoring me... What's going on here?
Q. I met a guy at my university last year. We had instant attraction and started liking each other. Though the school year had ended, he was coming to uni as he was involved in a protest/occupation against the school. He would keep staring at me an...
A. 15 June 2018: What would make you think he wanted to have sex with you last year? Honestly I think you are over thinking this. He doesn't even remember you from last year. From what you have wrote he is being friendly with you but nothing is screaming out that he ... (read in full...)
Is my long-distance husband using me?
Q. Hi and thanks I have wrote on here before but I wasnt able to find my question. I have married a man from Africa, I'm Canadian. We met on Facebook and we have been married for 16 months. Doing a long distance relationship isnt easy ...
A. 14 June 2018: Money cannot buy love. If you genuinely feel that he loves you then stop the payments and see how long it will be until he gets bored with you. As his wife he should be equally looking after you and sending you money. He should not expect you to ... (read in full...)
Me and my dad's friend want to take it to the next level
Q. Me and my dad's friend have been texting for a while and we've talked about taking things to another level... Im not sure what to do about it, i mean i'm 21 an he's about 30, I have always like older guys and we are into each other but you know he's ...
A. 14 June 2018: By another level do you meal getting physical or actually going on a date? I think if you are going to take anything further you both need to be honest with your Dad. If you are not able to do that then I don't think you should cross this line. Not ... (read in full...)
I asked for help and he lied about why he couldn't.
Q. I am not sure if what I am feeling right now is normal or I am being unjust? I asked for help from my boyfriend of 4 years. what I need is a room/place to stay for 1 year while I am doing the last part of my studies. We do not live together...
A. 14 June 2018: I think after four years if he is still not ready for you both to live together then you really need to be asking yourself is this relationship going anywhere? I mean your age bracket says late thirties so I am sure at this stage you both should ... (read in full...)
How do I stop being so insecure about my boyfriend’s last relationship?
Q. Hello all.. So I’ll get right to it. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 months now, officially 3 months. I actually met him a year ago at my job. I sold cars and he was a customer of mine but he ended up buying a car from a competitor. But ...
A. 14 June 2018: There is no magic wand that you can wave and that fear will go away. Off course it is weird for him his friend going on a date with his ex. It would be strange if he didn't find it weird. He has history with his ex and that is never going to change. ... (read in full...)
The relationship started off terribly and it’s still rocky, but we really love each other! Do I leave or stay?
Q. I’m in this relationship with a guy for a year and a half now. The relationship started off terribly because he started ghosting me after a month. We hardly met and he never replied to me. He used to ignore me for most of the time. I made a fake ...
A. 12 June 2018: Honestly do you think he loves you? I am guessing you have low self esteem and that is why you are not wanting to leave him and I understand that really I do, but do you not feel like you deserve better? Surely you deserve a man who is going to ... (read in full...)
Where is the panty liner, will he think me disgusting if he finds it?
Q. Before me and this guy had sex I went to use the bathroom and I removed my pantyliner. The pantyliner was clean as I recently put it on but his trash was overflowing so I decided to just wrap it up and put it in my pocket and throw it away when i ...
A. 12 June 2018: It was clean so no big deal. If you are comfortable enough to have sex with each other then these things shouldn't bother you either! It is all normal and nothing to be embarrassed about. ... (read in full...)
What’s the difference?
Q. Whats the difference between making love and just having sex? Like what are some things that would take place if you’re making love rather than just having regular sex?...
A. 12 June 2018: Personally I think the difference is having sex with someone for fun it can be intimate and passionate but well there are no feelings involved.
Making love is between two people who are connected and who have deep feelings for each other. ... (read in full...)
Should our relationship be more connected than this?
Q. My partner and I have been together for three years and I feel like our lives aren't as "connected" as they should be. We lived together and spend a lot of time together in the flat, but outside we don't do anything. I have a few close friends, b...
A. 12 June 2018: Am guessing this is the third post you have sent regarding your relationship? You add a little bit more each time.
If you are not feeling connected then it might be because you are both leading separate lives. Why not try and learn his native lang... (read in full...)
How do you know if you're meant to be together forever?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3.5 years, lived together for almost 3 years of that. He's my best friend and we've spoken openly about marriage and kids. Anyway, my question is, how do you know if you're really meant to be together fore...
A. 12 June 2018: How do you know? Well nobody knows. Nobody can tell you if you are going to be together forever or not, life just doesn't work that way. If you love him and you want to be with him, then you both need to work at the relationship and become a team. ... (read in full...)
After seven years I find myself becoming detached.
Q. I'm in a 7-year relationship. We're both divorced, both have children, but mine are older (hers are 11 and 14). It seems to me that we used to be "closer" and talked about future dreams, things we liked about each other, flirted with each other, ...
A. 12 June 2018: Honestly you need to stop talking to other women until you figure out what it is that you want. I mean you might not be physically cheating but I don't think it will help you talking to other women.
You say you feel like you are being taken for ... (read in full...)
How do I end this pathetic relationship without him turning it all around on me?
Q. Hi I’ve been in a relationship for 6 years we have a 3 year old daughter together the relationship is pathetic between us there’s no affection he sleeps on the sofa does everything to avoid spending time with us it’s always me doing everything for ...
A. 11 June 2018: I hope that you are okay and you will feel much better in time, I am happy to hear that you are putting yourself first. ... (read in full...)
Is my long-distance husband using me?
Q. Hi and thanks I have wrote on here before but I wasnt able to find my question. I have married a man from Africa, I'm Canadian. We met on Facebook and we have been married for 16 months. Doing a long distance relationship isnt easy ...
A. 11 June 2018: I remember you posting about your African husband before and I will say the same now as I did then, it is obvious he is scamming you and I think you no that deep down but you are lonely and you want to believe that this man loves you. You need to ... (read in full...)
How do I stop being so insecure about my boyfriend’s last relationship?
Q. Hello all.. So I’ll get right to it. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 months now, officially 3 months. I actually met him a year ago at my job. I sold cars and he was a customer of mine but he ended up buying a car from a competitor. But ...
A. 11 June 2018: I've had boyfriends who have lied and cheated on me in the past, but guess what that doesn't mean everyone will! I trust my husband and it wouldn't be fair to judge him on other peoples mistakes.
They always say a person who is insecure will end ... (read in full...)
How do I end this pathetic relationship without him turning it all around on me?
Q. Hi I’ve been in a relationship for 6 years we have a 3 year old daughter together the relationship is pathetic between us there’s no affection he sleeps on the sofa does everything to avoid spending time with us it’s always me doing everything for ...
A. 7 June 2018: Off course he will try and turn it around on you, and he will probably believe it as well. If we asked him his side it would be very different. But none of that matters. What matters here is you are not happy with him any more. So the best thing to ... (read in full...)
| *unt honesty's friends
These are mutual friends, so *unt honesty has
added them and they have added *unt honesty!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
