Like what
he writes?
... Add *irtball to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *irtball a private message | | | *irtball's profile:Hello DC. Some of you may be wondering where I were I went. My life has taken a turn that has taken me away from here for the time being. I'm not really answering many questions at this time. If you PM me, I will respond, but it may be delayed a week or two. I had many problems dumped on me of my own, so I don't have much energy for the problems of others. I'll be back, but it just may be a while.
Wow, been away longer than anticipated. To sum it up, life sort of sucks for me at the moment. Not looking for pity, just letting you know why I haven't been around. I still hope things will get better soon, but who knows.
ALERT: If you're sending me a PM in regard to advice I've given you, please reference the thread or specifics so I can be on the same page. Lately I've been receiving lots of PM's with an answer to some question I asked, but since the question was from an Anon poster, I have no idea which answer it was in regard to. I give a lot of advice here, so I'm very sorry if I don't immediately recognize you. The question title or a link would be most appreciated. Thank you!
_____________________________________________
Hi, I'm the bad bad charming sweetheart dirtball. Although recently I seem to have picked up the moniker "Dirty Balls" despite making sure to clean them thoroughly each day. Anyway, I love this site. I have a BA in Psychology which is part of the reason I think I like this site so much. I posted anon for quite some time before creating my profile. I took to the brutally honest approach which has gotten me in trouble a few times, but for the most part has gone quite well. I enjoy helping people and at times challenging them when I think it is appropriate.
_____________________________________________
I've been getting lots of great feedback on my advice and I appreciate it, even if you didn't like it. With that said, I'd like to add a segment here I'll call (drum roll please)
DIRTBALL'S RULES ABOUT PEOPLE AND DATING (in no particular order)
Men don't befriend women who they are not interested in sexually. What do I mean by this? I mean that men will not actively seek out friends of the opposite sex unless they would like to make the friendship progress further at some point. Plain and simple, that's how we operate. Are there circumstances where they are actually just friends? Yes, those would be times when you are forced together in some way. Examples could be; fellow employees at work, a regular customer at work, shared friend circle. The key to watch for is if he looks to spend time with her alone. That's usually the sign that he has a romantic interest in the relationship.
Long Distance Relationships don't work. Go ahead and tell me your success stories, I don't care. Most of the time it is just way too hard for the parties involved. Too much doubt creeps into the relationship. Plus, can you really call it a relationship if you only get to be together rarely? I think not.
Once broken up, you should stay that way. Make up/break up relationships don't work. Why do you always feel the need to break up? It's because things aren't working. Then you miss each other and get back together, only to have the very thing that drove you apart last time do it again. It is a cycle that doesn't get better. All you're doing is preventing yourself from finding someone who will actually make you happy.
People only change if they really (and I mean REALLY) want to for themselves. Changes for the benefit of others are temporary. True change is very hard to make. It requires diligence, effort, and support.
Communication is the most important part of your relationship. So many times we have people here asking about how they should handle a situation when the solution is simply to talk to your partner about it. We forget how important this is. It affects everything. If you are feeling upset about something, it is best that you discuss it with your partner instead of burying it and letting it brew. Later it will explode when it could have just been a calm discussion if addressed right away. Communicate with your partner. If you never talk, why are you even together?
People can love each other and not be right for a relationship. This kind of goes back to the make up/break up rule from earlier but it extends to present partners or exes as well. When someone is part of your life, especially for long periods of time, it is natural that part of the love you carry for them will always be there. Just because you love someone though, that doesn't mean you should be together. That's the case with most of my ex GF's as I'm sure it is with many other people. Sometimes you need to consider if love is making you do foolish things.
You should set ground rules in your relationships. Let your partner know about deal breakers. Deal breakers being defined as things they would do that would cause you to end the relationship. It is good to get these out of the way when you are getting serious. That way, you can refer back to them if your partner does something against said ground rules. An example that I tell all my girlfriends (including friends who I'm not romantically involved with) is that I will never answer the question "Am I fat" or any variation of it (does this make me look fat, does my butt look big, etc). I explain why too. It's a trap question. Answer yes, and that's obvious. Answer no, and "you're just saying that." So I won't entertain that question. I know, silly, but this works for the bigger picture too. Figure out what's important enough to you that you'd be willing to end a relationship. Tell your partner what these things are. If they want to be with you, they should know.
When one person in a relationship has a problem, it's a problem for the relationship. You're not alone in your relationship, and dismissing your partner's problem doesn't solve anything. It makes them feel devalued and unimportant. Why don't you care enough to address something they think is a problem? It's because you know it's a problem but want to hide. Don't hide from it. If you do, it won't go away.
When a relationship ends, you need to give yourself proper time to grieve it. Like dealing with death, you go through the same stages. Denial, anger, depression, bargaining, and finally acceptance. This is part of the problem with rebound relationships. Take the time you need. Don't be afraid to wait.
Let the past be the past. It's over, it's done, and there is nothing that can be done to change it. There is no use dwelling on it because there is nothing that can be done about it. Don't worry about things that cannot be changed. You can't drive a car by only looking in the rear view mirror.
I'm sure there will be more to come, but these are the few I've seen myself repeat a lot in my rather short time here.
____________________________________________
This is, hands down, the best conversation I've seen about porn yet on this site: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/why-is-there-no-middle-ground-when-it.html
____________________________________________
Dirtball Rants:
1) What the hell happened to punctuation and grammar? I blame text messaging for the trash I see people write. It's not the content but the way it's expressed that makes me wonder what's happening to society. I realize that we're a multinational forum here, and I give a complete pass to someone who is doing their best despite the fact that English isn't their first language. But the crap I see from Americans, the British, Canadians, and Australians often makes me sick. If any of you read this, your posts would be much easier to read if you used paragraphs, sentences with punctuation, and whole words instead of abreviations like U, cuz, or wut! Quit being so fucking lazy if you want help.
2) There is a difference between the words your and you're. "Your" denotes ownership. "You're" is the contraction of "you are." Saying something like "your lame" is wrong wrong wrong! The same goes for there, their, and they're. "There" is used for things like places (look over there). "Their" denotes ownership (they wanted their cookies back). "They're" is the contraction of "they are." An example, "they're going to the service station over there to pick up their car which was just repaired." I bet that just blew your mind.
____________________________________________
Abreviations.
I use a lot of abreviations when I type advice so I'm going to start a list of the most common ones I see for use as a reference tool.
OP - Original Poster, the person asking for advice.
BF - Boyfriend
GF - Girlfriend
SO - Significant Other, your BF, GF, Fiance, or spouse in other words.
BTW - By the way
FWIW - For what it's worth
TBH - To be honest
IDC - I Don't Care
IDK - I Don't Know
IMHO - In My Humble Opinion
IMO - In My Opinion
IOW - In Other Words
THO - Titty Hard On (erect nipples) |
|
| Latest articles: The Curse of Over Thought
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
24 March 2011: The curse of over thought. I think many of us suffer from this curse. Some people may call it a blessing, but I tend to consider it a mixed bag. On one hand it can help lead people to some tremendous insights, on the other it can lead them do...
How Personal Bias and Gender Stereotypes can Influence Advice
This question has 40 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 February 2011: I write this article knowing full well it will not be received very well by some. I can only hope that this article will still be allowed due to the merits of the argument I am presenting. I have noticed on multiple occasions a prevalent double...
Why did you even ask?
This question has 22 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
25 January 2011: What brought you to Dear Cupid? Most likely it's because of some problem in your life or relationship. That's how most of us stumbled upon this place. You came here hoping that these anon people on the internet could offer you some insight into ...
Tis the season...
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 December 2010: Hello Everyone. Here at Dear Cupid we receive many requests for help. Some are serious relationship problems, others aren't quite so serious. One such question is "What should I get my significant other for Christmas?" I intend to give you some ...
What ever happened to communication?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
17 November 2010: Having been here for a while now, I see consistancy in many of the problems people who come here face. One major problem, although it isn't usually the one that brought them here, is communication. Communication is usually the underlying problem ...
Paralyzed by not knowing
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
20 October 2010: After reading a string of questions today I started really thinking about the topic of: "do they like me back?" It happens a lot. We develop a crush on someone. We think about them a lot. We read into every little thing they do or say. We ...
Thoughts on technology and long distance relationships
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 September 2010: It never fails to amaze me how many questions I see on here about long distance relationships (LDR's). I will admit, I understand the temptation. I've been there. I've tried it. I've concluded that they don't work. Still, what is it about these ...
|
I cant stop thinking about my family friend
Q. ok there is this guy i can't stop thinking about. He is a family friend. We were out at a bar friday night with my family and ended up at a mutual friends house after, someone we didn't know asked if i was his wife and i said no, as he was saying ...
A. 28 April 2011: That's something at least. I'd keep it casual, "Hi, how have you been?" Not much else. If the conversation starts to flow, then suggest getting together sometime and see how he reacts.... (read in full...)
I discovered my husband watches porn...I am threatening divorce
Q. Hi, I have been reading various questions and answers recently and have a question of my own to ask you all: About 5 years ago I discovered husband had been watching porn, I came across this quite innocently while looking through our music librar...
A. 27 April 2011: So, what are we learning here? A successful marriage needs respect, compromise, fidelity, honesty, and similar views on core issues (i.e. dealbreakers).
Porn is the trigger, not the problem. We can debate porn all day, but the true problem ... (read in full...)
I cant stop thinking about my family friend
Q. ok there is this guy i can't stop thinking about. He is a family friend. We were out at a bar friday night with my family and ended up at a mutual friends house after, someone we didn't know asked if i was his wife and i said no, as he was saying ...
A. 25 April 2011: He didn't know how to respond, because something like that does NOT belong in a text. It's hard to say if you ruined your chances or not, but if he likes you, then you didn't. Things will likely be a bit awkward the next time you see him though.... (read in full...)
I discovered my husband watches porn...I am threatening divorce
Q. Hi, I have been reading various questions and answers recently and have a question of my own to ask you all: About 5 years ago I discovered husband had been watching porn, I came across this quite innocently while looking through our music librar...
A. 25 April 2011: "If I never trust anyone again I will protect myself from any hurt they may inflict on me"
True, however you will also not be open to the happiness that can come from it either.
When we are hurt, the natural instinct is to shut down and close o... (read in full...)
I cant stop thinking about my family friend
Q. ok there is this guy i can't stop thinking about. He is a family friend. We were out at a bar friday night with my family and ended up at a mutual friends house after, someone we didn't know asked if i was his wife and i said no, as he was saying ...
A. 23 April 2011: *sigh*
That's not something you text the first time you tell someone. You TELL them...... (read in full...)
I cant stop thinking about my family friend
Q. ok there is this guy i can't stop thinking about. He is a family friend. We were out at a bar friday night with my family and ended up at a mutual friends house after, someone we didn't know asked if i was his wife and i said no, as he was saying ...
A. 21 April 2011: That implies he wants you to meet her, which is a good sign.... (read in full...)
I cant stop thinking about my family friend
Q. ok there is this guy i can't stop thinking about. He is a family friend. We were out at a bar friday night with my family and ended up at a mutual friends house after, someone we didn't know asked if i was his wife and i said no, as he was saying ...
A. 21 April 2011: I was referring to the suggestions I gave for asking him about his feelings for you. One was an indirect method: dropping hints and making a joke about the wife comment. The other was direct: asking him out on a date.
Since you say you're s... (read in full...)
Why does she want to marry me when she doesn't want to be with my physically?
Q. hi guys and galls. I was just hoping for some views on my situation. I an due to be married next year after 5 years in this relationship. Over the part 8 months me and my future wife have had sex 5 times. This is not normal for any relationship ...
A. 20 April 2011: From once a week to less than once a month. Has it slowly been decreasing or was there a drastic change at some point?... (read in full...)
I think he will come back eventually if he wants me, but on the same note, I can't wait forever....What do I do??
Q. I'm so confused about how I feel about someone. I was dating him a while ago, and it was going so well. Felt such a connection and he payed me so much attention I felt on top of the world :o) . We started to get really close... Then, things got ...
A. 20 April 2011: Decide what you really want. If you really want this guy, then tell him that and do your best to give it another go. If you're unsure, that's a good sign that maybe this isn't the relationship for you. That doesn't mean you're ready to date other ... (read in full...)
I'm engaged, he's married, but we've both confessed feelings for each other. How can we deal with this without it affecting our friendship?
Q. My coworker and I have feelings for each other. The problems are he's married and I'm engaged. He admitted to me that he's attracted to me. I admitted that I like him, too. We had a talk. It was a talk about not crossing the line and we are not ...
A. 20 April 2011: Having been through something similar in the past, cutting contact is about the only way, or at least a drastic reduction. Still, whenever you see each other, those feelings come back.... (read in full...)
How can I get over this girl?
Q. after 3 years of a virtual life with my long distance girlfriend that i have never met, she leaves me !! i cant believe this is happening, im crazy in love with her and so was she, but lately she was acting so weird, she always uses the excuse ...
A. 20 April 2011: "its drivin me crazy knowin that someone else would get to kiss and touch her while i havent done that !!!"
And that's why long distance relationships DON'T work! It's just a constant tease that never gets better until you're actually together... (read in full...)
In a relationship, but fell in love with someone else.
Q. Ok, so here goes..i cant handle this thing alone anymore and i need some advice. I'm in a relationship with this guy for 3 years and we live together. I love him and everything is great apart from the usual arguments couples have. Recently i got in ...
A. 20 April 2011: I'm confused, have you ever actually been together with this other guy? You say you had to see him again, so you've seen him in person in the past? Have you ever kissed him?
Sometimes we fall in love with an idea rather than a person. How do y... (read in full...)
Guys: Do you all want a younger woman?
Q. Guys, tell the truth, do you REALLY want a younger woman than the one you are with now? I am in a relationship with a man 15 years my senior. The other day I asked him if he woud date a woman in her 40s he said no, in her 30s he said no (even...
A. 20 April 2011: Just to add another "NO" to the pile. I've dated girls both younger and older. Until very recently the strongest connection I had was with a girl slightly older than myself. ... (read in full...)
Should I just ask him where I stand?
Q. Alright ive known my bestfriend for 5yrs. he joined the army last june and im really proud of him. we've always been straight forward and honest with each other. about two months before he told me he was going to join i had confessed to him that i ...
A. 20 April 2011: If he's cut communication, I'm not sure what reaching out will really do for you. Is he deployed, in basic?
Honestly, if someone has feelings for you, I would expect them to be more communicative, or at a minimum let you know why they aren't c... (read in full...)
Why does she want to marry me when she doesn't want to be with my physically?
Q. hi guys and galls. I was just hoping for some views on my situation. I an due to be married next year after 5 years in this relationship. Over the part 8 months me and my future wife have had sex 5 times. This is not normal for any relationship ...
A. 20 April 2011: I'm less concerned about the sex and more concerned about the lack of communication. Not a good sign. Has she always been this way with sex, or did her drive drop off more recently?... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants my blessing to have sex with another guy!
Q. my girlfriend wants to have sex with another guy at a convention and wants my blessing. shes says its cool cause i will be allowwed a free pass too. why won't she understand that i only want to be with and should i see at her wanting to end things....
A. 20 April 2011: What aunt honesty said.
Open relationships aren't for everyone, and it's good that you know they aren't for you. Don't cave on your morals. What she's proposing is ridiculous to many people, but perfectly acceptable to many others. Perhaps ... (read in full...)
In a relationship, but fell in love with someone else.
Q. Ok, so here goes..i cant handle this thing alone anymore and i need some advice. I'm in a relationship with this guy for 3 years and we live together. I love him and everything is great apart from the usual arguments couples have. Recently i got in ...
A. 20 April 2011: What made you decide to reach out to this guy again? Why wasn't he left in your past where you put him before?... (read in full...)
I discovered my husband watches porn...I am threatening divorce
Q. Hi, I have been reading various questions and answers recently and have a question of my own to ask you all: About 5 years ago I discovered husband had been watching porn, I came across this quite innocently while looking through our music librar...
A. 20 April 2011: To add a male perspective, pretty much all of us lie about it unless you convince us you're ok with porn. It's not right, but it's a learned behavior. Even a guy who swears up and down he doesn't watch it likely does. Just a warning about what ... (read in full...)
Questions about sex and virginity......
Q. is it possible to become a virgin again after losing it? my vargina gets too wet when I am romancing with my man, is it normal?...
A. 20 April 2011: sexlessintheuk is right on both accounts.... (read in full...)
I still have his jacket...should I give it back?
Q. Hey, My ex broke up with me about 6 months ago- but we've had this back and forth thing where he'll call me every 2-3 months (drunk and sober) saying that he misses me, that i scare the shit out of him. There's an age difference between us I'm 2...
A. 20 April 2011: Because I am a dirtball, just the sweet and caring kind... Get me on the right topic and it shines through gloriously! lol
Thanks for saying you respect me. I appreciate it. By the way, lots of people here call me DB instead (if that helps at... (read in full...)
Should I go see a prostitute?
Q. Recently while i was overseas I had sex (twice) with a prostitute, in an adult venue. She had the looks, body and personality of a porn star. It as the best sex I ever had (and the most expensive!) As I am single and having to 'pay for sex' is...
A. 19 April 2011: No. But it's up to you how you live your life.... (read in full...)
I had melanoma on my penis and had to have it amputated. Ladies how would you deal with this if it happened to your partner?
Q. Last year I was diagnosed with melanoma on my penis. To save my life, I had to have my penis amputated. So far I've recovered well. I've seen tons of trolls on sites claiming to be 18 and having penile cancer (virtually unheard of in young men) but ...
A. 19 April 2011: You have my sincere condolences as well. I hope that you never have anymore bouts with cancer. I think you both may want to go through some therapy. I have a feeling there will be some residual issues that come about over time. Right now you ar... (read in full...)
I have feelings for him, he doesn't feel the same. How can I get over him?
Q. How can I get over someone who doesn't love me like I love them?...
A. 19 April 2011: The only things I've found are time and space.... (read in full...)
I'm 13 and dating a 20 year old, my friends are telling me to be cautious. Please help!
Q. Hey everybody.. I want some advice I am dating a 20 year old and I am 13... He is very sweet but I'm still scared because all my friends are telling me to be careful. He said " no matter how long u want to wait to loose ur virginity I will wai...
A. 19 April 2011: He's what's known as a pedophile. Typical 20 year olds are not interested in 13 year olds because they are still children. Honestly, you cannot have as much in common as you think, or he leads you to believe. What he is doing is manipulating you, ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend thinks something that isn't true and is really upset about it!
Q. hi I went with my girlfriend to a falentine ball in february. while we were there a friend asked me to dance. So I asked her is this ok. and she said yes. when i came back se was really upset at me. she said she saw me kiss the girl . and so in ...
A. 19 April 2011: HAHAHAHAHA! If you don't want an opinion, don't ask for help on the internet.
I'm glad you have worked this out. I hope she can address her issues that led her to not only falsly accuse you of something, but not let it go either. It all come... (read in full...)
My wife had a promiscuous past before we married...and now she is frigid, and it's driving me crazy!! What to do??
Q. This is my problem...my wife has a "colorful" past. I never asked or pretended to be interested in knowing. But she came up to me and told me. I felt somewhat "let down" but never I repeat never held it against her or treated her differently. I ...
A. 19 April 2011: Yeah, that comment sucks, and is difficult to overcome. I don't blame you for feeling hurt by it. It gives you the feeling of: "why am I, your husband and the man you chose to spend the rest of your life with, not worthy of even considering trying ... (read in full...)
Should I remain friends with an ex who cheated on me while we were dating?!
Q. My Open Question: Why would he do all of that and want to be friends afterwards? During our relationship, my ex boyfriend had a one night stand at a party cos he was having problems getting it up and he thought he'd try elsewhere. he w...
A. 19 April 2011: Why was he so nice and sweet? To keep you on board and to keep you from looking into his side "activities." Why would he still want to be friends? To keep you on the line as a backup. Because he's selfish. Because your feelings don't reall... (read in full...)
My wife had a promiscuous past before we married...and now she is frigid, and it's driving me crazy!! What to do??
Q. This is my problem...my wife has a "colorful" past. I never asked or pretended to be interested in knowing. But she came up to me and told me. I felt somewhat "let down" but never I repeat never held it against her or treated her differently. I ...
A. 19 April 2011: Well, when you put it the way you did it's a miracle you get any at all. It's good that you're trying to discuss sex with your wife, but the way you do it is just as important as what you're talking about. The way you presented your argument ma... (read in full...)
I still have his jacket...should I give it back?
Q. Hey, My ex broke up with me about 6 months ago- but we've had this back and forth thing where he'll call me every 2-3 months (drunk and sober) saying that he misses me, that i scare the shit out of him. There's an age difference between us I'm 2...
A. 19 April 2011: LMAO! If you think my actual screen name is offensive, you should see how some people have twisted it over my time here...... (read in full...)
How do I get this girl's attention?
Q. Ok so i really like this girl (hs freshmen) and im a (junior hs). We talked for a couple of weeks but nothing serious really happened. and i realize that im older than her but idk if thats really a problem. But after i asked her on a double date and ...
A. 19 April 2011: Don't play games. Ask her on another date. Manipulation works, but it's not the right way to go about this.... (read in full...)
I cant stop thinking about my family friend
Q. ok there is this guy i can't stop thinking about. He is a family friend. We were out at a bar friday night with my family and ended up at a mutual friends house after, someone we didn't know asked if i was his wife and i said no, as he was saying ...
A. 19 April 2011: You know how when you want something, you read into every little thing about it instead of doing what you should? You're there. If you really like him, it seems like he's interested too. Drop him a hint about wanting to get together in a pr... (read in full...)
Is it bad to play with myself?
Q. is it bad to "play with myself"?...
A. 19 April 2011: Completely normal and healthy.... (read in full...)
I've hurt her and regret it now!
Q. Is it right for me to say goodbye to her? About two weeks ago, I have sent out a goodbye letter to a girl whom I love because I was mentally exhausted after everything occurred between her and me. Btw here is the link for the goodbye letter: ...
A. 19 April 2011: You may, it sounds like clinical depression to me, however I'm not a professional. Exercising such emotions can be healthy, but it's usually best if you DON'T send that kind of thing. :) On the bright side, you've realized that things with... (read in full...)
She is very quiet when she has an orgasm, is this because I am not very good?
Q. hi i was just wondering. I have been with my partner 7 years. And well she is so quiet when she cums. Is this normal or am i just not giving her good enough ones? I always please her before penertration as she says she cant cum through this method ...
A. 19 April 2011: After 7 years, don't you think you can ask her this?
Honestly, everyone is different. Not everyone screams like a porn star, but that doesn't mean they aren't satisfied.
Ask her. "I've noticed you're always really quiet when you orgasm. I j... (read in full...)
I still have his jacket...should I give it back?
Q. Hey, My ex broke up with me about 6 months ago- but we've had this back and forth thing where he'll call me every 2-3 months (drunk and sober) saying that he misses me, that i scare the shit out of him. There's an age difference between us I'm 2...
A. 19 April 2011: You seriously need to let this guy go. He's showing a pattern that isn't about to change. Next time he calls, ignore it. You don't have to answer if YOU don't want to.
Why perpetuate this failed relationship further? ... (read in full...)
I've hurt her and regret it now!
Q. Is it right for me to say goodbye to her? About two weeks ago, I have sent out a goodbye letter to a girl whom I love because I was mentally exhausted after everything occurred between her and me. Btw here is the link for the goodbye letter: ...
A. 19 April 2011: Let this go! My honest opinion of that letter is that it was horrible. I wish I would have seen that post when you made it because I would have screamed not to send it. It's you griping about being the only guest at your pity party and blaming ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend states he's single without consulting me!
Q. My boyfriend said he was single without consulting me the other day after we had a small bicker on Facebook because I'm on vacation for 3 weeks. He's been depressed lately and someone was obviously flirting with him but he scolded me for suggesting ...
A. 19 April 2011: Honestly, if he is telling people he's single, it's already over. I think you should make it official. Wanting daily contact isn't asking too much. If he needs some space, he can request it without being a douche. Especially after 2.5 years.
... (read in full...)
Girlfriend thinks something that isn't true and is really upset about it!
Q. hi I went with my girlfriend to a falentine ball in february. while we were there a friend asked me to dance. So I asked her is this ok. and she said yes. when i came back se was really upset at me. she said she saw me kiss the girl . and so in ...
A. 19 April 2011: She doesn't trust you. This is definitely a bad sign of things to come. There is nothing you can do to make her trust you. If she believes a story that isn't true, and won't let it go, then it's probably best if you walk away. Tell her you won't ... (read in full...)
Pieces of skin growing underneath clitoris!
Q. Hi. For the past couple of months starting around December time I have noticed that underneath my clitoris/near the uthereal there are these 3 pieces of skin growing. And at the end of them they are white but the rest of it is skin colour. I have ...
A. 19 April 2011: I think it's time to go to the doctor. It may be nothing, but I'd rather let a professional decide rather than random people on the internet... Don't you think?... (read in full...)
Signs of a Rebound Relationship?!?
Q. I was just wondering if my ex gf in a rebound relationship. We were together a year and 3 weeks after she was in another relationship... Here r some weird signs I've noticed... 1. She never talks about her new bf to her friends, but tal...
A. 19 April 2011: Possibly. She doesn't sound that into him. The thing is, it doesn't matter. Let her live her life and don't seek meaning in her actions. If you know you need to move on, why are you obsessing over her new relationship?... (read in full...)
Why doesn't my friend talk about her new boyfriend? She doesn't seem happy and I want to help.....
Q. I want to help my best friend (a real friend, not just me pretending). Basically she's got this new boyfriend, but she never speaks about him. I've asked our other mates about this and they have all said the same...I find it a bit weird!! She got ...
A. 19 April 2011: It takes time to build up the trust to talk to people about such things. The new BF just isn't there yet. She may not be in a place where she's emotionally able to let him in just yet either. Just be there for her when she needs a friend and let ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my BF, because although he's a great guy, the sex is awful. Is it my fault?
Q. I've cheated on my boyfriend and i feel really guilty. he is a great guy. he knows what i like, he treaats me to things all of the time, and he loves me and i love him. but when we have sex, he is awful. he just cant please me. he always comes no...
A. 19 April 2011: Great answer from So_Very_Confused.
Rather than talk to your "great" boyfriend, you cheat on him. Great decision making there!
He deserves to know what you did so he can make his own decision about what he wants to do. Learn from this. In t... (read in full...)
He wants me to do a strip tease for him. I feel so self conscious about it. How can I please him and deal with my feelings about my body issues?
Q. My boyfriend and I are going away for a weekend, and he wants me to dress up, and give him a strip tease. I've dressed up for him before, but it makes me feel self conscious, but not overly so, because I pick outfits that cover up the bits I'm ...
A. 19 April 2011: Sometimes it's ok to say you're not comfortable with something. Really, you just dance around a little while taking off your cloths, then you tease the heck out of him while he isn't allowed to touch you. YOU control this kind of situation, and it ... (read in full...)
Is he just trying to get back at me by trying to sleep with my little sister?
Q. so i was here some weeks ago about having problems with my bf because i cheated on him with a girl we used to have threesomes with..i know cheating is bad in every sense of the word and i deeply regret what i did and i apologized so many times but ...
A. 19 April 2011: You don't want to get back with him. He doesn't sound like a good catch to me. Of course you cheating doesn't make you much better.
How is him sleeping with sisters revenge if they don't know about it?
It is to him, and that's what matt... (read in full...)
It has been seven years and I still think about him
Q. I keep dreaming of a certain guy I used to see at church 7 years ago. We never dated but we used to act when we saw one another. I left church because always I was dreaming of him but he never came to me by then. Its been 7 years and I'm now married ...
A. 19 April 2011: Yet you avoided my question about loving your husband...... (read in full...)
How can I break up and afford to live on my own? he wants a threesome. He's over protective.
Q. Recently my partner and I broke up, but we still live together, he goes through my phone and expects me to have a threesome with him and one of my friends (who's a girl) He has been treating me a little child lately...xo. Here's more info I ...
A. 19 April 2011: So he has you trapped and it's starting to get abusive.
You need to figure out what you need to do to get out of this mortgage and do it, then leave this guy as far behind you as possible. If he lays a hand on you, you need to call the police. ... (read in full...)
Do you think girls who go with guys to a strip club are trashy?
Q. Guys, do you think it's trashy for a girl to accompany a group of guys to the strip club? I think it's a certain type of girl who is willing to go along on this "adventure," and I dont't think she's the type you wanna bring home to mom/MAKE the ...
A. 19 April 2011: I've had some great girls take me to the strip club. In fact my rule is only to go if a girl takes me, or in a large group. I've gladly introduced those girls to my mom, because it's possible to be a lady and enjoy something like a strip club.
... (read in full...)
My dad is having an affair, how should I handle this?
Q. Hi all, Sorry 4 the length. I had to explain in detail. I am so confused. I got an anonymous call with a hidden i.d a woman informed me that my father has a mistress and is willing to marry her. He is 58 years n has been married to my mum for 3...
A. 19 April 2011: That depends on who you ask. She would probably say yes, but she will resent you for telling her either way. Then because that's not news anyone wants to receive. And now for the same reason and that you didn't tell her earlier. Not to mention ... (read in full...)
How can I break up and afford to live on my own? he wants a threesome. He's over protective.
Q. Recently my partner and I broke up, but we still live together, he goes through my phone and expects me to have a threesome with him and one of my friends (who's a girl) He has been treating me a little child lately...xo. Here's more info I ...
A. 18 April 2011: I think you need out of this relationship. He's way over the top if he's coming to your work to check your phone. If you can't afford your own place look for a friend, or adds for people looking for roommates. You have options if you look. This ... (read in full...)
It has been seven years and I still think about him
Q. I keep dreaming of a certain guy I used to see at church 7 years ago. We never dated but we used to act when we saw one another. I left church because always I was dreaming of him but he never came to me by then. Its been 7 years and I'm now married ...
A. 18 April 2011: You don't even know this man. You have some fantasy ideal of him in your head.
Honestly, what sort of religious person says "leave your husband for the church?" Sounds more like a cult to me.
Are you happy with your husband? Do you love him?... (read in full...)
My dad is having an affair, how should I handle this?
Q. Hi all, Sorry 4 the length. I had to explain in detail. I am so confused. I got an anonymous call with a hidden i.d a woman informed me that my father has a mistress and is willing to marry her. He is 58 years n has been married to my mum for 3...
A. 18 April 2011: This is NOT something you want to be in the middle of. It sucks that you were put in the middle of this. Really, this is between your parents. As much as it sucks, I think you need to stay out of this for now.... (read in full...)
I still have his jacket...should I give it back?
Q. Hey, My ex broke up with me about 6 months ago- but we've had this back and forth thing where he'll call me every 2-3 months (drunk and sober) saying that he misses me, that i scare the shit out of him. There's an age difference between us I'm 2...
A. 18 April 2011: Yeah, I'd return it. It might help you let go of the relationship as well. It will be for the best.... (read in full...)
| *irtball's friends
These are mutual friends, so *irtball has
added them and they have added *irtball!
|
