New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login239826 questions, 1060602 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap
*ougbcoll agony aunt

*ougbcoll

United States  (Male   XML/RSS

Like what he writes?
... Add *ougbcoll to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *ougbcoll a private message

*ougbcoll's Ratings
Excellent76%
Average9%
Poor15%
1234567891011Next > [12 pages, 431 answers]

I want a prettier girlfriend who cares about being fit and healthy. What do I need to do?

Q.   I want a prettier girlfriend. I've been with mine for a few years now and it seems wrong to leave. I love her but the lack of effort (exercise counts) is making me less attracted to her. Bringing it up makes me the bad guy. What should I do?...

A.   30 January 2017:  You really don't love her or you would be more caring, and giving. You are more in love with yourself and the ideas that you have of yourself. You care more how the person next to you makes you look in public, puffing up your ego more... (read in full...)

My husband wants me to date other men for sex!

Q.   I have been married for 17 years my husband for the past 5 year asks med to have sex with other men while we are having sex it gets him harder, should I? I have explained to him sex is more then sex to me, he says for me to go out and date then. I ...

A.   10 January 2017:  He is not protecting you in your marriage by offering you to other men. allowing you to by chance get emotionally attached to another man, giving you away to another man for their pleasure. he is wanting to taking a huge chance of damaging ... (read in full...)

Why do men insist on commenting about other women's looks?

Q.   I was wondering if anyone could shed some light in this for me . A guy was seeing went out of his was to make a point to me how beautiful his ex wife was. I have also noticed before that men seem to do this when on dates sometimes . They seem to ...

A.   5 January 2017:  men are very visual, but i consider it a bit rude to be bringing up other women on a date. sounds like he may be stroking his EGO a bit.not so much to make you feel bad , but to make himself seem better. kind of rude and inconsid... (read in full...)

I find myself attracted to another person. I would never cheat. But what does this feeling say about my current relationship?

Q.   I have been in a relationship for nine years. I love him. But recently I have found myself somewhat attracted to someone else. I would never cheat, ever. But is this something that is normal? It's just a crush but does that mean I don't fee...

A.   2 January 2017:  feelings come and go. we can be attracted to many different people.the chemistry we may feel may draw us to another, that in part why people cheat, commit adultry (affairs) ect... what do you have once the new has worn off? usually end up with... (read in full...)

Crippling retroactive jealousy - does it get better?

Q.   My battle with retroactive jealousy: - It's been almost 2.5 years. Improvements: - It is getting better. I can function normally in last one year. - Hearth shattering instant images no longer pops up. - It is getting less visual. - I kinda g...

A.   23 December 2016:  you cant help the way you feel. people telling you to get a grip, get over it does not help. you feel this way because you love her, because you care. i know how it feels, i have been married for three decades and still feel the hurt. ... (read in full...)

I'm comparing myself to his beautiful ex and feel like I don't measure up!

Q.   I have been married to a wonderful man for the last 4 years and I have yet to find any flaws in his looks or personality. In being up front, this is a question based out of my own insecurities and not from something he has done or said. He w...

A.   17 December 2016:  you should have nothing to fear. she was under handed , played the adulterer on him, saying that she did not think much of him to go out and cheat on him. she may seem flawless on the outside, but she is lacking in character. she is more... (read in full...)

Boyfriend is turning 22 and it worries me

Q.   I'm 17 and my boyfriend is 21. He is turning 22 in march and for some reason that scares me. We've been dating over a year and are very committed to eachother however I feel nervous and I don't understand why. I've never dated somebody this old ...

A.   7 December 2016:  your ages are about what my wife and my age are when we met and dated. she was 16 and i was 20. we have been married almost 34 years so don,t let age be in your way. you either love each other or you don't. you either like each other ,or ... (read in full...)

How do I take back a stupid lie I told to my boyfriend?

Q.   Hi, Let me start with saying I have been extremely stupid. I started dating my current boyfriend 1.5 years back, and wanted very badly to impress him. Unfortunately I had told him sometime back (before we started dating) that I had 2 boyfrien...

A.   7 December 2016:  well a relationship is built upon trust, honesty, respect, love. you have decisions to make ! to come clean or keep living a lie. if you choose to be real and open up to him you need to do it with an open heart and not cover any thin... (read in full...)

Boyfriend wants me to give another man oral sex.I am not happy with this!

Q.   My boyfriend has been pressuring me into blowing another guy and I feel completely uncomfortable with the idea, I have told him this everytime he's asked and now he brings it up in the middle of sex or while he's dirty talking, I told him I'd ...

A.   26 November 2016:  anything of value a guy does not want it used much, touched by other people, and keeps in a safe place- maybe on a high shelf. when a guy has a girl that is valued, loved and cherished to him he wants to protect, not be touc... (read in full...)

If a man's intentions are sex, will holding off make him like you more?

Q.   I had read an article on the Evan Marc Katz website and it mentioned that holding off on sex weeds out the guys who are only interested in getting into your pants and not really wanting to get to know you/don't like you. I also heard from a dif...

A.   7 November 2016:  the female anno.... that wrote.if you hold out on sex the right guy will wait. if you are giving out a guy will take it, and not respect you as much. he may even think if she gives out this quick , and easy she will give out to any guy ... (read in full...)

Three boys to choose from!

Q.   Hello im a freshman in high school and I am having some problems with 3 guys... I know it seems like a lot but I really need help because it is taking over my head every single day. (Ill use Boy A, B, and C for their names). Boy A is a sophomore...

A.   3 November 2016:  don,t chase after the boys ,or treat it like door no.1 , door no.2, or door no.3 game of choice. let the right guy win your heart. present your self with value, self respect. give it time , he will be the one you will want to be with all the ... (read in full...)

The man I'm dating keeps asking for sex

Q.   Hello. Looking for some advice. I have been single for 17 years and dating the last eight years. Have had a few relationships that lasted six months. I have had a lot of bad luck in relationships. Seems like men don't want a serious relationship. ...

A.   3 November 2016:  keep your self respect , don't give in would be my advice. he may be nice but you really need to get to know who he is. you know a few of his good qualities , but you really need to know who he is. you give him what he wants how do you know... (read in full...)

I think he's selfish for taking viagra!

Q.   I just found out my husband has been taking Viagra. He's 63 I'm 57. What makes me upset is that he should have talked to me about it, and I have not wanted sex for years. Been together 32 years and we've been having sex twice a week for last few ...

A.   1 November 2016:  it has not hurt your relationship any, has it ? yes he could have told you, but look at it from his side maybe just maybe he wanted to not let you down in the romance area. he is taking it for you, not just for his selfish needs. i... (read in full...)

I'm on vacation with girlfriend but found out she wants to break up with me. What do I do now?

Q.   Ok so I'm on holiday in Tenerife with my girlfriend of 4 months and I have just found out she wants to end it with me either during or after the holiday. I've read messages between her and her mum who is encouraging her to "get shot as I'm not good ...

A.   30 October 2016:  well if it was me, i would feel walked on if i read a message from her knowing she was thinking of dumping me. let me ask how can you trust her if she is texting an f##k buddy? that she wants to sleep with him again. how can you build a ... (read in full...)

How do I respond to my wife now I know about the affair she had with my (then) best friend behind my back?

Q.   I just found out that my wife had a sexual relationship with my best friend and the best man at my wedding. This happened 26 years ago! We had been dating exclusively for 4 months at the time. Even though it was so long ago, I feel like it could've...

A.   7 October 2016:  she was dating you, but betrayed you behind your back and kept it secret. so did your some what of a best friend buddy X. It may have happened along time ago like she said, but it does matter. it matters to you , and should matter to her.... (read in full...)

How do I respond to my wife now I know about the affair she had with my (then) best friend behind my back?

Q.   I just found out that my wife had a sexual relationship with my best friend and the best man at my wedding. This happened 26 years ago! We had been dating exclusively for 4 months at the time. Even though it was so long ago, I feel like it could've...

A.   2 October 2016:  you are feeling hurt, loss, and maybe seeing them in your mind. this is understandable. i have been married for 30 plus years, knowing her 36 years, and still feel hurt from my wife before we was married. we dated she was a virgin. we brok... (read in full...)

Why do I keep running into cheap dudes?

Q.   Why do I keep running into men that are cheap,they always want something for nothing? I've ran into plenty of guys who want to use me for sex but then if I need something they won't have my back. Like why should I give u what u want but you can't ...

A.   5 August 2016:  because they are out to get SEX. if you give it up freely, cheaply, and quick to please they are going to take it and run. why should they give you what you want, when you gave them what they were after, SEX. some guys will take sex and run.... (read in full...)

Should I date a girl who sleeps with many men?

Q.   Hi, So there's this girl I've had a crush on for ages... she's been depressed and so she's been hard to really get in with I guess. But now recently after getting pills she seems to be happier, and she also seems to be really into me. I was really...

A.   25 May 2016:  i think you know what you can handle and what you cant. you are not being a jerk if you don't agree with her giving it out to every guy that comes along. if you do decide to date her you will wonder who has she been with while you was ... (read in full...)

Is it wrong to screen out women as potential partners due to their past sexual history and how many partners they have had?

Q.   I spent a lot of my teens having low self-esteem and have very little dating experience. I had a girlfriend in high school. Still a virgin even though I have done everything else. I used a lot of that time to make sure I have an amazing future and ...

A.   2 May 2016: nothing wrong with screening out your future mate. you don't want to get to a place in life and start wondering about her past and what if she might be hiding things from you. take your time choosing the girl that you want to make a future with. ... (read in full...)

If you've already had sex, then which do you think is better - Affection or Sex?

Q.   I don't think I want to have sex. I thought I did and I was getting ready to lose my v card soon. But every time I think about sex...I'd say ninety percent of the reason I'd have it is because the guy wants it. I know it sounds stereotypical bu...

A.   2 May 2016: sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders. the problem is boys will give love to get sex, and girls will give sex to get love. most of the time the girl comes out on the loosing end after the boy gets what he wants. he will be off on his ... (read in full...)

How do I know I don't love him anymore? What is love?

Q.   I need to talk to my boyfriend about our relationship as I have recently been thinking about ending it. Things haven't been the same and I don't feel the same anymore. I care about him but I don't know whether the love is still there? We don't see ...

A.   5 April 2016:  "things haven't been the same and i don't feel the same anymore. i care about him but i don't know if the love is still there?" feelings come and go, that is an emotion. so i take it you did love him? right. time apart does not help. how ... (read in full...)

Unfinished business? Should I leave my current GF for an ex?

Q.   Dear Cupid, I have been going out with my current girlfriend for roughly 5 months now, and everything was going fine, until my ex recently came back on the scene. I had a strong connection with my ex and we were each others best friends. I do n...

A.   31 March 2016:  get back with EX. like other poster said current girl deserves someone who truly loves her. your current girl does not need to play second place in your life, she deserves to be first place in someone's life. you get back wit... (read in full...)

My ex-girlfriend is pregnant by another man and has asked for my help!

Q.   How should I feel? My ex-girlfriend is pregnant by another man and wants me to take her to get a abortion? ...

A.   25 March 2016:  so basic was with another guy, and wants you get rid of the unborn baby. she is putting you through a lot emotionally if you ask me. i think you should wash your hands of her and not be drawn into this with her.she is basi... (read in full...)

Boyfriend is angry because I'm not ready for sex

Q.   my boyfriend and me are in a relation since last three years. he says he wants sex but i am not ready. he got angry when i said so. I really love him and i dont want to lose him. but i am really not ready for sex. he is really angry with me when i ...

A.   23 March 2016:  if he loves you he will try to understand , value and respect your wishes. he needs to look at you with love, not self centered wants. you need to tell him that he is the one in your life and not anyone else. that you love him, and do n... (read in full...)

Things ended without any explanation, now I want him in my life as a friend. Or should I leave him be?

Q.   Long story short last year me and my ultimate crush were on the borderline of a relationship and I could tell he felt the same. We're both sort of shy I guess and never admitted but always spent time together and people thought we were in a ...

A.   16 March 2016:  you cant force yourself on him, he will feel smothered. you can show him you care, and are there for him with words of love, acts of kindness. you can get deeper to his heart by penning a card. writing your thoughts from your hea... (read in full...)

Is it possible to live happily ever after knowing that my husband occasionally sleeps with other women on side?

Q.   Is it possible to live happily ever after knowing that husband sleeps with other women on side occasionally(paid sex with high end escort/companions)? He always use protection and is very hygienic. I've got him n myself tested few yrs ago when I i...

A.   7 March 2016:  "i want to know how to stop worrying and enjoy life." he is basically cheating on you, and you know it. as long as you put up with it it will continue. sure he loves you, but he is getting his cake on the side also. ... (read in full...)

Boyfriend wants to continue being friends with her but it upsets me

Q.   I'm looking for pretty open minded advice here so bare with me lol. My boyfriend and I were together for about 4 years. We had a great relationship but towards the end we had some difficulties outside of our relationship that we couldn't really ...

A.   1 March 2016:  "big issue : he wants to continue being friends with the woman he cheated with !" why would he want to just be friends with someone he cheated with, if he is in a relationship with you. he will be tempted or going back to her o... (read in full...)

Have I rushed into dumping him ? How can I ask him for another chance?

Q.   I dont know if ive made a mistake , I dumped my boyfriend yesterday because i came last in his life. I know work and family come first. I wouldnt expect to come before them, but he couldnt give me the time i wanted. I'm not demanding. I'd be ha...

A.   29 February 2016:  How long have you been with him? You should tell him how you feel, but tell him in the right way to not offend him. You should not have to settle for last place. Let him know you feel neglected and that you need more. He may be a ... (read in full...)

My Gf says I'm boring. So what nice things can I do for her, other than buying her things?

Q.   She's my first girlfriend and we've been together almost a year. It seems she has always wanted me to be more of a boyfriend and do more things for her, though she's told me I'm getting better at it and then she'll just tell me again later she still ...

A.   3 February 2016:  if you are giving your heart to her ,there is very little else you can give to her that has value. things you can give her, time, conversation, caring, listening. these should have great value to her. how about walks in a park. bein... (read in full...)

Having an affair with my friend's husband

Q.   I m 22 years old n i love a guy he is 23 and married to my friend.we have known each other since 1 year ago before evwrything was ok but since 4-5months we are regularly talking with each other and meeting secretly.we both have feelings for each ...

A.   26 January 2016:  basically you are cheating with a married man,and he is cheating on his wife. i would say your friend (his wife) your friendship is over. people do not need friends that will still their husband or wife. his wife is the one that will feel the ... (read in full...)

Should I even bother with a man who still has his ex's photo on the wall 10 years after she has passed away?

Q.   I went met this guy online. We talked for 9 months before making plans to meet in person. He was a very nice guy, but has an annoying side to him. He liked to win when we had our little spats. Anyway, we went on a couple of dates finally, and they...

A.   24 January 2016:  he may fall in love with you, but you can't expect him to stop loving his wife that has died. he can have a place in his heart for you, but is it right for you to take away the place he has for his love that has died no matter how ... (read in full...)

Do you believe in destiny? That you were meant to meet a certain person?

Q.   I am curious about what everybody thinks. Was I meant to meet my BF of three years? Was it fate? Destined? We could have crossed paths twice before finally meeting the third time. The first time about 20 years ago at my work place where he...

A.   23 January 2016:  a lot of people may not believe in destiny , but i do. because i believe things in life happen not just by pot luck but for a cause. we all have choices to make, things in life happen for better or worse. when i was 14 riding down... (read in full...)

How do I get my guy to be less of a gentleman?

Q.   Hi. I have met this great guy. As soon as I dated him, I could see that he was as good as he looks. I look at the way he is with his son and my family and could really love him.He's so sweet, but sort of shy with me. He kisses me and calls me baby. ...

A.   19 January 2016:  you could be with some of the deadbeats that are out there. if he is treating you like a lady , you better be thankful. he has found a treasure (you) and knows it. not enough guys in this day and time that treat a woman like... (read in full...)

Confused after discovering her sexting: is she going to rekindle an old flame? Do I leave her or make it work for the kids?

Q.   I caught my wife of 13 years sexting an old "friend" from her old neighborhood. I accidently received a pm from a social site (she used the site to sign into a music app on my phone and didn't sign off) and it contained explicit details of her ...

A.   14 January 2016:  "help I'm in the fog" she sent you a text stating she missed you to ease her conscience while she was sexting the other guy. " my question is should i be worried of her trying to rekindle it with this guy?" yes you should be worried ... (read in full...)

Should I go with the good guy or do I stay where I'm comfortable?

Q.   About a month ago, my life got a little messy. I have been in a faithful, committed relationship for four years. My boyfriend and I have an apartment together, we own three cats and a dog. We've had a long history. We've been through everything ...

A.   13 January 2016:  so you need to know if you need to stay with the long term lazy , controlling , never worked boy friend that sex is great with. or go with the new guy that works,is a gentlemen, that is loving immature, and the sex is not great. ... (read in full...)

I can't imagine trusting someone enough to have sex.

Q.   I'm 17, a virgin, and I believe myself to be somewhere on the asexual spectrum. I have what I believe is a low sex drive compared to what I've heard from my friends. I think at some point I'd like to have sex but honestly it really doesn't matter to ...

A.   20 December 2015:  look you are young you do not need to give yourself heart ache, regrets , or feel pressured to have sex. your friends that already have cant undo what they have done. if they were honest with you they more than likely would tell... (read in full...)

How can I meet more suitable men?

Q.   I think I am struggling to meet a suitable guy because maybe I have too much. I have worked hard all my life and have my own house and car and have two grown up children. I was a young single parent but I studied and worked really hard. The guys I ...

A.   17 December 2015:  there are plenty of dead beats , and low life's that will take a woman for everything if they can. so i understand your concern. example after my dad died my mother remarried. she met him at a church social for single p... (read in full...)

My husband said I'm not as tight down there as the other girls he's been with

Q.   I recently got married and it's my first time losing my virginity to my guy , we have had sex a couple of times and his complaining about that I'm loose down there and he doesn't enjoy sex with me he said his been with other girls before me and it ...

A.   8 December 2015:  " please someone give advice on what to do is it me or just him" your guy is comparing you with other girls he has been with , not very nice, caring , or loving doing that to say the least. you gave your virginity to him... (read in full...)

While hiking during rough weather my boyfriend would go ahead and just leave me. Are men like that?

Q.   My boyfriend and I had a week end planned which involved a 3hr hike. The weather ended up being really bad with a storm that hit the country. It wasn't so bad where we had planned to go hiking. It was however very windy and wet. We decided to go ...

A.   7 December 2015:  "are guys generally like that?" no that behavior is self centered, not being a gentleman, that kind of behavior is more of that of a jerk. to me a guy should be watching out and protecting the woman he is with, not leaving her to fend... (read in full...)

Is he too young for me? What do you think?

Q.   im 31 and there is this guy who is 26, everytime i go into the store, he keeps flirting with me to the point that my bro thinks he will ask me out soon and a customer asked me was I his girlfriend…..the guy is a store manager at a grocery store…...

A.   4 December 2015:  that is only 5 years difference . i knew a guy i work with his wife was 20 years older than him. he is in his 40's , she in her 60's. that could cause a problem with age gap. but 31 to 26 not that big of a gap. you will have to grow together ... (read in full...)

*ougbcoll's friends

These are mutual friends, so *ougbcoll has added them and they have added *ougbcoll!

AbigailBradbury agony auntAbigailBradbury
angelDlite agony auntangelDlite
Annonymous.. agony auntAnnonymous..
blondie1961 agony auntblondie1961
BondGirl72 agony auntBondGirl72
Candycane1234 agony auntCandycane1234
cary12 agony auntcary12
dougbcoll agony auntdougbcoll
foreveralone456 agony auntforeveralone456
Gokullove agony auntGokullove
hot4shoes agony aunthot4shoes
KittieS agony auntKittieS
Mariab agony auntMariab
me7654321 agony auntme7654321
Miamine agony auntMiamine
no nonsense Aidan agony auntno nonsense Aidan
Roxypuss agony auntRoxypuss
Sweet-thing agony auntSweet-thing
YouWish agony auntYouWish

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft

0.140624799998477!