I'm pregnant and work part time. My husband wants me to get another job to pay his parents debts.
Q. My husband's parents owe a large amount of money to a family member which they can't pay. They have asked my husband to pay the money on their behalf, we are talking £500 per month for the next 10ish years. My husband works 9 to 5 and I work part ...
A. 1 March 2019: Listen, not only do I not recommend you do this like the others have said, but you need to protect yourself! Your husband wants to harm YOUR family to subsidize his parents, and that is unacceptable.
If he will not see reason and tell his pare... (read in full...)
Is she shy or just not into me?
Q. Hi There is a girl I really like, I see her every day. I know I should just ask her out but i am very shy and as much as people tell me to do it i find it hard, but i think I will have the confidence if i see some signs that she is interested. ...
A. 1 March 2019: How do you encourage conversation?? All too often, people make the mistake of stimulating conversation either by talking about a subject and waiting for someone to "jump in" OR they ask closed-ended questions that give a yes or a no answer.
... (read in full...)
My ex still has our couples pictures on his facebook. I want them deleted.
Q. why is my ex keeping my pictures (our pictures together) on his facebook account and says in relationship with me? He broke up with me 6 months ago. I do not want him to keep my pictures on his profile, I blocked him but can still see his ac...
A. 27 February 2019: You could un-tag all of his pictures so that your name and profile don't come up with the pictures he's saved. But the others are correct -- if you had truly blocked him, he wouldn't be coming up in your searches!
Unfortunately, there really i... (read in full...)
Somebody keeps hacking my boyfriend or is he cheating?
Q. I keep finding my boyfriend on multiple dating/cheating sites and find his search history is filled with things like: Women near me to have with tonight? I have asked him about it and he says he didn't do it. Tat someone is hacking him. Is that ...
A. 27 February 2019: He's a liar. No hacker would care about dating sites. They'd be stealing his info and opening credit cards or breaking into his bank account or some such. But entering him onto dating and random sex sites? COME ON.
You can NOT be so gullible... (read in full...)
My husband of one month is sleeping in the living room because he likes playing video games! It’s stressing me out!
Q. Dear cupid I married my husband a month back and we were dating for past 4 years. My husband started sleeping in living room starting a week ago, when I ask he says it's easier since he plays video games till past midnight and he want to keep com...
A. 15 February 2019: I think he will outgrow it. I have been a gamer all of my life, and when I was younger, I could easily play Final Fantasy or some other RPG/strategy game until 3am. However, I had to grow up, work long hours, and balance my time with my ... (read in full...)
My ex was hiding something, am I right?
Q. My ex broke with me and block me from fb, after 10 days he told me he missed me, but cant be with me, but he also did not wanted to tell me where he was living etc . He kept texting trying to be friends, which I tried. He told me when we met that ...
A. 15 February 2019: Oh, absolutely. You were either a mistress and the "other woman" in his cheating on his CURRENT marriage, *OR* he found someone new and is ghosting you.
I mean, come on. SIX months you were dating someone without even KNOWING where he lives?? ... (read in full...)
I waited 2 years for him and now he has a girlfriend and is snubbing and ignoring me!
Q. hi cupid i saw a guy i felled in love with him i revealed to him that i loved him he asked me to give him time to feel the same way for me that we can still be friends i patiently waited for him for two years but only to find out now that he has a ...
A. 15 February 2019: Unfortunately, he doesn't feel for you what you do for him, but rather than outright tell you, he wussed out and didn't want to hurt your feelings, so he gave you an answer that unfortunately led you on, hoping that you'd "take a hint" rather than ... (read in full...)
Were my comments racist?
Q. Hi everyone, I had an interesting and slightly upsetting conversation with a friend tonight. We got on to many inane topics that a few drinks brought to the surface and he asked me about my ‘type’. I explained that I am not someone to gener...
A. 15 February 2019: Code Warrior absolutely NAILED it when he said this:
"IMO, your friend was trying to exercise control through faux moral authority and virtue signalling. If he can get you into a defensive posture then he can control you by essentially demandin... (read in full...)
My Nigerian husband keeps asking for money and gets upset when I question him!
Q. Hello and thanks My husband and I have been married for two years. I love in Canada and he is from Nigeria. For the most part he treats me well he is very charismatic. Tells me he loves me many times predates. I’m working on his permanent vi...
A. 14 February 2019: You *are* being scammed. These guys have many "wives", the good ones having stables of 10, 20, and even 30+ women whom they always never seem to get to move to live with, always seem to need "additional paperwork" or bribes to pay officials to get ... (read in full...)
Any advice on premarital counseling?
Q. My fiance and I are recently engaged and want to try premarital counseling. We have a good relationship but I think counseling will give us a chance to discover/discuss topics we may not have thought about. We also both agree that we need to work on ...
A. 6 February 2019: I did 12 weeks of it, and I'd say that it was the best thing we could have done! It saved so much friction and miscommunication in our marriage to learn and talk about things before we married.
I wholeheartedly recommend that you do it. The best... (read in full...)
I love dogs but my boyfriend doesn't. How can I make him change his mind?
Q. My bf and me got into an argument tonight because we were talking about dogs and I said they are better than people. He asked why I think that. I said because dogs are so selfless and pure. They are always happy and love unconditionally. Unlike ...
A. 6 February 2019: I can fully empathize with Code Warrior. I grew up with way too many pets - they nicknamed our house "Noah's Ark" because we had 2 dogs, 2 cats, 2 canaries, 2 gerbils, 2 fish, 2 horses, 2 foxes, a guinea pig, 2 MORE cats (outdoor barn cats), and ... (read in full...)
My mother-in-law is suddenly causing friction and problems in our marital life!
Q. My husband and I have been getting into a lot of disagreements/fights lately - mainly about petty things (money, household chores etc) but most have just built up over time. His mother has started to insert herself into this - and even when everyt...
A. 5 February 2019: The answer is as plain as day. All marriages have their share of petty disagreements, and sometimes arguments. However, the worst thing any couple can do is for one or both spouses to go and vent those petty grievances and arguments with THEIR ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend wants his Playstation
Q. Hellooo Everyone, I'm going to try and keep this simple. My boyfriend and I were meant to be going to visit his family for the weekend. On Saturday, I will be home alone for about 7 hours while everyone goes and watches a football game ...
A. 3 February 2019: You wrote this:
"I think he's being immature. It's his playstation and I happen to want it this weekend, it should have just been packed. "
You say that he's being immature, but it's YOU who is throwing the tantrum, arguing loudly and causi... (read in full...)
I feel forced to have sex to maintain the relationship
Q. I'm a bit confused I'm in a relationship and I like the relationship the romance kissing and cuddles but I don't really like having sex I've never really liked it. I feel forced to do it as part of the relationship everyday several times a day and I ...
A. 2 February 2019: Thank you for the follow-up!
I can tell by your posts and especially by your follow-ups that he's extracting sex from you by being emotionally abusive. He is holding your relationship hostage to getting what he wants. A real man would never do... (read in full...)
I feel forced to have sex to maintain the relationship
Q. I'm a bit confused I'm in a relationship and I like the relationship the romance kissing and cuddles but I don't really like having sex I've never really liked it. I feel forced to do it as part of the relationship everyday several times a day and I ...
A. 24 January 2019: SEVERAL TIMES a day?? He's got an addiction if he's demanding sex from you that often. He's using you for a get-off machine, and that's not fair to you. You don't like sex because he isn't doing anything for you, and he's not respecting YOUR sex ... (read in full...)
He's coming on too strong, talks about sex a lot, has a child with an ex. Should I ignore these red flags?
Q. So about 6 months ago I met this attractive guy.. we met in a cute way as I got him lost accidentally by trying to help with directions, and he later gave me his number and name, which I hadn't asked for. I added him on Facebook and he messaged me, ...
A. 24 January 2019: Man, I hate being contrary, and while I completely agree with the thoughts of the other aunts who mentioned his having a one-year old kid being a point of concern when it comes to choosing a partner, I have to ask this question of the other aunts as ... (read in full...)
I’m not sure how to interpret ‘hey chick’ in his text!
Q. If a male acquitance or a friend sent you a text starting 'hey chick' and you had not one like that before from them, is it something as a female you would find endearing, condescending or the sender being flirty with her. Had one recently and ...
A. 22 January 2019: Oh! And PS..I would probably respond "Umm, I have a name!"... (read in full...)
I’m not sure how to interpret ‘hey chick’ in his text!
Q. If a male acquitance or a friend sent you a text starting 'hey chick' and you had not one like that before from them, is it something as a female you would find endearing, condescending or the sender being flirty with her. Had one recently and ...
A. 22 January 2019: What is the context? What was the text about?? "Hey Chick", and then what did he say?? What has he said before? Has he been flirty with you in the past? Does he get flirty with a lot of people? Is he outgoing or gregarious? All of those ... (read in full...)
Should a man break up with a woman over not getting enough sex?
Q. Been in a relationship for two years, am 63, she is 58, I work one job she has one full time job an a part time job. I pretty much live with her, own my own house to.what's up is maybe sex once every two months, she always got an excuse.she just ...
A. 21 January 2019: I'm sorry, but I've never heard of a guy making the distinction that since a woman can swallow food "a lot fuller", that she should take an entire penis and not just the tip of it.
You *do* realize you really REALLY don't want to make that kin... (read in full...)
I lied to my boyfriend about the time frame last time I had sex before him. He STILL doesn't know the actual truth. What should I do?
Q. Hey all! I have been with my boyfriend for about 3 months now. We are both 26 years old and in very transitional phases of our lives. We also recently (within the last year) ended long term (3-6year) relationships. Both relationships we...
A. 21 January 2019: Yeah. I have a suggestion. How about "Shut the hell up about previous relationships and sexual history?"
It has nothing to do with him, and he deals with retroactive jealousy anyways. Stop bringing past sexual activity or past men into this pre... (read in full...)
I'm tired of being the bigger person every time we argue
Q. Dear cupid, I've been wirth my boyfriend for about 2 yrs now, we live together and are very committed to each other and growing our life together. 2 nights ago we were watching a movie and there were preganant women and kids it. I'm in my early 30s ...
A. 12 January 2019: I'm with Janniepeg on this one. You have crossed the 30 year old threshold, and in this issue, your age difference (the fact that you're older than he is) is working against you. The older you get, the more difficult it will be for you to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's 12 year old doesn't like me and boyfriend will not step in and do anything
Q. Hi I’m in a bit of a dilemma and seriously need some advice. I’ve been with my bf now for 7 months. We both love each other And have spoken frequently about marriage and living together. However here is my problem. I have met and get on ver...
A. 12 January 2019: In truth, it's prudent to take things very slowly when it comes to introducing a new boyfriend/girlfriend to a child. Most experts and manuals actually suggest waiting an actual YEAR before introducing a new lover into an existing household. Seven ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend tries to have anal sex without my permission. Does he not respect me?
Q. I am 64 female,boyfriend is 60,seeing each other for 6 weeks now and have had amazing sex,he is much more sexually experienced and into porn very much. He tried to enter me analy without asking me and I jumped back because it really hurt,told him ...
A. 11 January 2019: Don't let him touch you again.
At his age, if he's THAT "clumsy", then he's mentally challenged and shouldn't be having sex in the first place.
However, at age 60 and not 13, he knows full well what he is doing. It's on purpose, and as ... (read in full...)
My FWB hookup told me he had decided to date me until he found out I had sex with someone else
Q. Since December 21 I've been intimate with someone. He knew I liked someone else but me being conflicted didn't know if I'd act on it or not. After our second sexual encounter I asked him if he wanted to date me he declined saying he just wanted to ...
A. 11 January 2019: I agree with the others. He is full of crap. You didn't hurt his feelings, or he would STILL act on his feelings to date you. You have nothing to apologize for, and like the others have said, who else you sleep with, or the fact that you were ... (read in full...)
I thought he liked me but then he went ahead and completely ghosted me!
Q. To make a long story short: Started talking to this guy online..We hit it off. Met in person about a week later. Had great first date. He texted me when he got home to tell me he had a great time and wants to see me again and said he is inter...
A. 9 January 2019: Yeah, I'd give him one more week before blocking him. If he got his car towed, it might actually BE hectic for him. However, in the meantime, you should have your profile back up and still be open to dating someone else.
Go silent and give him... (read in full...)
Boyfriend says he doesn't have time to be with me when I am sad or upset
Q. My boyfriend of 10 months has been staying away from me for a few weeks now after we had this fight. It was over the matter regarding my promotion and i was talking to him about it and got carried away talking about the promotion related other stuff ...
A. 9 January 2019: Your boyfriend is the textbook definition of EMOTIONAL ABUSE.
You worked hard to get a promotion!! You didn't get "carried away" by telling him! You were excited about it! He is trying to break you down both by belittling your accompli... (read in full...)
A stranger offered herself to me to help me lose my virginity. Do I accept?
Q. I will be 20 very soon and am still a virgin. I have tried to date probably more than a hundred women and have always been rejected. I have contemplated visiting an escort but don't want to lose my dignity doing so. Out of a whim I posted an ad o...
A. 3 January 2019: OP, why are you hesitating?? She sounds like any other person out there with a harmless fetish, and you DID post in public for a random sexual encounter!
I agree -- pay for a hotel room for the deed, even though I think given that she didn't c... (read in full...)
Sex has changed with my partner ever since my dad died. How can I fix this problem?
Q. Hi. Since my dad died 4 months ago, I have been having a hard time going back to the sexual self I used to be. I used to be more aggressive in bed and liked more animalistic sex, but since my dad died, it seems I am unable to go back to that. The ...
A. 2 January 2019: First off, I'm really sorry about your father. I was just like you when my father died as well, along with the change in intimacy needs that happened.
You are still dealing with grief as it's only been 4 months. You will return to the way you ... (read in full...)
I love him but since his massive weight gain don't find him attractive enough for sex
Q. Hi, okay so I really hope I don’t come across as been an absolute bitch here but I could really use some help!! So. My partner has put on a lot of weight. A good 4/5 stone! He was around 12 stone when we met. He’s 6ft3 so was really slim, I’ve alw...
A. 23 December 2018: I plugged his weight into a BMI calculator, and as you didn't put in your height, if you are 5'6" or shorter, you have the same OR HIGHER BMI he does!
He's not that overweight! He is knocking on the obese door but hasn't yet walked through ... (read in full...)
He wants to spend the rest of his life with me but without marriage.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year. We have a child together. We are both divorced. We both have children from the marriages. We are in a serous relationship. He has talked about us getting a home together. He has said more than ...
A. 23 December 2018: Honeypie has it perfectly.
The question for you is - is that a dealbreaker??
You can't assume that he will change his mind. You must take him at his word that he really doesn't want to marry again. Can you live with that?
Also, you live ... (read in full...)
Is collateral damage a side effect of online dating?
Q. I’ve been trying online dating for a little while with the goal of eventually finding a committed relationship. I haven’t actually met anyone in person (yet) but I have chatted with a fair number of people. Most of those conversations fissled out ...
A. 23 December 2018: The short answer is - eventually, you will have to choose one.
The key to not burning bridges is to be honest. Eventually, you're going to want to take a few of these people offline for a face-to-face real-world date. Even then, for FIRST da... (read in full...)
Is the whole world incapable of keeping a date? Am I doing something wrong? Am I just unlucky?
Q. I’ve been trying online dating for the past month or so. I’ve been using Tinder, Bumble, and OkCupid because apparently they are the 3 most popular dating apps. I figure the more people I talk to, the better my odds of success are. I’ve talked with ...
A. 21 December 2018: I concur with everyone else around here, but would like to add a little bit of advice designed to cut through the flakiness of those sites:
The reason why Tinder, Bumble, and OkCupid are popular in terms of profiles and such is because they are... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't want children, my mother is heartbroken.
Q. I met my boyfriend 1 year ago. He is 40 and I am 30. He told me about 3 months into the relationship that he does not want to have any children. I am confused because I am not sure if I want to have any. I know that my current circumstances will not ...
A. 8 November 2018: The real issue is whether YOU want children in your life. Forget about your mom for a moment, and think about what you want your future to be. If you have even the slightest desire for children, then you should leave your boyfriend, who is NOT ... (read in full...)
My ex girlfriend wants to be reimbursed for gifts she gave me.
Q. I have recently broke up with my girlfriend after nine months together, a couple of weeks before we separated she bought me a present but now we're not together she's asking me to give her back the money she spent on that present, I don't think ...
A. 8 November 2018: The present a couple of weeks before you broke up with her? If *YOU* did the breaking up, yeah, return the gift. Don't give her the money itself. If you have the gift, give it to her and let her deal with returning it. Items depreciate when they ... (read in full...)
Why does my husband look up the category of ex girlfriend in porn?
Q. My husband occasionally uses my laptop. And sometimes watches porn on it, which is fine as long as our sex life is ok. I always delete the porn off my browser history as i sometimes need to bring my laptop into work. Anyway, apart from looking up ...
A. 8 November 2018: Ex-girlfriend porn is either simulated or ACTUAL revenge porn. The difference between ex porn and conventional porn is twofold:
1. It features amateurs. The women in these videos don't know they're shooting porn, so the sex is authentic rather t... (read in full...)
Is what this 15 year old girl wears okay around a father who drinks?
Q. Is it ok for a 15 year old girl to walk around the house in her bra around her father...and he drinks heavy so his judgement could be possible inpaired .what should I do? how should I handle this while staying with them....?...
A. 8 November 2018: If anyone around here has read Genesis 19 from the bible, it's a story that definitely DOESN'T get featured in all the spiritually corny statements and platitudes, trust me! Genesis 19 tells the story about two daughters who had lost their husbands ... (read in full...)
We have fun and the sex is amazing but then why doesn't he fall for me?
Q. Hey all. I feel like a spoilt brat here, like Verruca Salt when she can't get what she wants. I've completely fallen for a co worker. He works in another office and lives 80 miles away. He lives alone (divorced with a son) as I live with parents ...
A. 6 November 2018: He has separated emotions from sex. We women tend to bond emotionally with our sexual partners, which is why FWB (friends with benefits) much more often hurt women who develop feelings for their partners than they hurt men.
He loves sex with you... (read in full...)
I don't understand why she did this to me
Q. I know part of the answer. She's selfish. Has some severe mental health issues but so do I, so I'm trying not to hold it against her. Been scouring all over the internet to understand. Narcissist? Bipolar? Just trying to make sense of all this. ...
A. 4 November 2018: You were only WITH her for a couple of months! You can't KNOW a person in that timeframe, and the first real red flag that should have been tossed up your way is how fast it took her to pull out the "L" word. It takes TIME to fall in love. The ... (read in full...)
I am devastated that my ex has cut me out of her life. I thought we were still friends
Q. My ex girlfriend doesn't speak to me anymore and it still haunts me. Her and I were the best of friends before we ever got together. We did everything together and were in a relationship for roughly three years when we split up. We are both women, ...
A. 3 November 2018: Holy crap! You're with someone new! I wonder how she would feel if she knew that your thoughts have coalesced around an ex? That's not fair to your current relationship.
Once a relationship has a sexual/romantic element to it, it simply C... (read in full...)
Boyfriends drunken night may be the end of us but I want to make things work. How?
Q. Dear cupid Me and my bf of three years had a bad fight tonight and he is not talking to me, i stay in his house. He is terribly druck after fight , fell in the bathroom, refused to take my help asked me to get out. I did leave him there, didn't kn...
A. 1 November 2018: This is a couple of days later, and I hope things have been able to be talked out.
You wrote in the night of the fight, while your boyfriend was still wasted and stumbling drunk. It was probably the best thing to stop talking that night and slee... (read in full...)
Engagement called off due to past relationship how do I fix things?
Q. I was engaged to a wonderful guy.He is a virgin and have very high Morales and values.However, i lied to him about my past relationship and virginity. Engagement called off due to videos and pictures of sexual activity and intimate ones,ta...
A. 13 October 2018: Convince them of WHAT???
You have just paid a horrible price for both your lies, and your lack of intelligence by allowing your sexuality to get anywhere near a camera. When it comes to taking pictures, you never take anything that you wouldn't... (read in full...)
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