Was this a missed financial opportunity and should I have consulted with my boyfriend?
Q. I'd like opinions from everyone about communication and responsibility within a relationship. To briefly summarize, my boyfriend and I live in my childhood home. We get by w/ our jobs and friends/tenants helping out on the monthly expenses. B/c my ...
A. 2 September 2017: Are you SURE you're common law? Check your state, because common law is all but absent in the US now as far as a legal marital status is concerned, and don't let him tell you any different when he comes pressuring you about that money.... (read in full...)
Was this a missed financial opportunity and should I have consulted with my boyfriend?
Q. I'd like opinions from everyone about communication and responsibility within a relationship. To briefly summarize, my boyfriend and I live in my childhood home. We get by w/ our jobs and friends/tenants helping out on the monthly expenses. B/c my ...
A. 1 September 2017: Your boyfriend is WAY out of line. If he wants *that* kind of input into your finances, then he should marry you, plain and simple. Your boyfriend is an emotional status, not a legal financial one.
You live together, so your expenses are like... (read in full...)
If I was doing something really annoying or inappropriate, would she have made it more obvious?
Q. I apologise if I have posted this one already as I tried a couple of forums to get a little advice as I'm a bit shy to ask my friends. So me and a female friend have started having sex. We talked about it long and hard before trying it for the firs...
A. 1 September 2017: I think she was just making an observation. She may or may not have liked it, or she doesn't know if she likes it or not, as you didn't mention whether or not you do that a lot during a session.
The best thing for you to do is to ask her, may... (read in full...)
Why does my married lover not admit how he feels about me? And keeps changing his words?
Q. Can anyone here help me to make sense of my married lover's words? Why did he tell me he loves me? Then the next time he says he likes me. Then he says he likes me a lot. Then the next time he says he adores me. And the next time after that, it's...
A. 31 August 2017: Every word that comes out of a cheater's mouth is worthless and not even worth the oxygen it took to breathe in to say it with.
He is saying whatever it takes to:
1. Keep you giving him sex
and
2. Keep you off his back.
You are the "ot... (read in full...)
Is it ever ok for your boyfriend to insinuate that you're fat? Feeling hurt and ashamed, how do I react?
Q. Hey guys :-) I was just hoping for some advice. I've been with my boyfriend for 7 years and I think of myself as a really good girlfriend to him. When we first got together we were both in very good shape. However over the years we've both put w...
A. 27 August 2017: The way I see it, you have two separate issues here:
1. Your current weight and your emotions surrounding it
and
2. Your partner's weight loss and subsequent crusade.
Let's hit the first one first:
1. Your weight. You know how it ha... (read in full...)
My ex is contacting me again, what should I do?
Q. My ex and I had a messy break up. I got drunk, was upset and got into some trouble and ended up in hospital. I called my ex and left a message to say I was in hospital. She never came and I never heard from her. I ended up needing surgery. Year...
A. 26 August 2017: Listen, I need to be direct with you:
You are deflecting.
You are using this to avoid some serious problems in your life, and rather than address these issues, which are hard, you're focusing on your ex and whether or not she should be in you... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's friend comes over when I'm not there, now they slept in the same bed. What is going on?
Q. when I first met my bf he had this girl that was his friend but they also hooked up a lot. And she wanted to have a relationship with him. But he didn't want to be in a relationship. She found a bf. And after a few months me and my bf started ...
A. 23 August 2017: No, you shouldn't believe him. He's a liar, a cheat, and he thinks you are a stupid, gullible, useless woman who deserves no respect beyond the effort he needed to concoct a sad, pathetic lie. He thought so little of you that he figures you're ... (read in full...)
A co-worker made an unkind remark that really hurt me. How do I cope?
Q. I'm feeling very hurt today. At my previous job (as well as life in general) you could say that I'M not the most organized person (not filthy, but more of an issue of putting things back where they belong, avoiding clutter and procrastination,etc. ...
A. 23 August 2017: Heh, I would have just smiled at the co-worker and say "Switch to decaf already!" and then go about my day.
People are going to say unkind things to you. Life is not fair, and some people are just douchebags. But *YOU* give permission for thos... (read in full...)
My close friend is dating my boss, who is cheating on her!
Q. I've got a very complicated situation that I'm not sure what to do about. One of my close friends is dating my boss. She used to be pretty unstable before they got together three years ago but recently she's been really happy. I've found out that...
A. 22 August 2017: With this one, seeing that it's your livelihood, your career, and your permanent record on the line, you BACK AWAY and stay the hell out of it! You see nothing. You hear nothing. You know nothing.
How would you explain seeing things not mean... (read in full...)
I can't get over my ex of 4 years ago. I treated her badly and have regrets
Q. Hi 4 years ago I was with a woman I fell completely in love with I admit now I didn't treat her how I should of done I called her a couple of nasty names and generally treated her like rubbish now every morning I wake up with her on my mind I see ...
A. 22 August 2017: That's for damn sure, Honeypie!... (read in full...)
Didnt cheat but feel guilty ?
Q. Me and my gf have dated for about a year and a half. A few months ago. I've never flirted or talked to or tried to cheat on her (never even thought about it. Me and her were going through an extremely rough patch, constantly arguing, and bei...
A. 22 August 2017: Actually, you did the right thing in the end. All of us in relationships or even marriage has that one moment of temptation, followed by guilt and a fear that we've just exposed a weakness in ourselves. Those who don't care will be led by that ... (read in full...)
Is it too much to ask to want a virgin partner?
Q. I am 25 and a virgin guy. Is it too much to ask for a virgin partner? I mean i have no disrespect for those who aint and i believe that every person has a choice. PLEASE HELP! ...
A. 21 August 2017: You, I respect. I usually get irritated when some people come on here, having about 20 women under their belt, and then demanding to be with a virgin. But you put your money where your mouth is, so that's understandable that you want someone with ... (read in full...)
She didn't like my solo comment to a girl online and now she won't speak to me
Q. Been seeing this girl a month , I like her she is the good girl sweet type.. It took her forever to have sex with me.. she hasent had sex in 4 years had an abusive ex .. long story short I was on Facebook chatting up another girl I wasn't hiding it ...
A. 21 August 2017: You sound like a 12-year old! And I apologize to all of the 12-year olds out there!
First of all, "it took forever" to have sex with her? You were with her for a MONTH, genius! That tells me everything I needed to know about you.
Second ... (read in full...)
I can't get over my ex of 4 years ago. I treated her badly and have regrets
Q. Hi 4 years ago I was with a woman I fell completely in love with I admit now I didn't treat her how I should of done I called her a couple of nasty names and generally treated her like rubbish now every morning I wake up with her on my mind I see ...
A. 21 August 2017: After seeing your age, and knowing that you weren't some immature young teenager when you were with her (indeed - you were in your 30's when you broke up!), if you were so in love with her as you say, WHY did you mistreat her??
That is very imp... (read in full...)
She's boring and bland and I need to cut her loose but how do I let her down without hurting her feelings?
Q. Hello everyone, I've recently been speaking to a girl that I got speaking to through social media. I just randomly messaged her one day and things took off and we've now been speaking for roughly two months. We went on a date after about 10 d...
A. 21 August 2017: Tell her that she's attractive, but you don't see this going anywhere because there isn't a lot you two have in common. Just tell her that it's best to go in different directions.
Do it face to face. You slept with her in person, so you owe her ... (read in full...)
Am I too sensitive or he just rude?
Q. Would you be upset at your BF for ignoring a "Thinking of you" text you sent to him? I can see he opened it but he didn't respond. About an hour later, I saw he was on Facebook for 45 min til 11 p.m. While he was on FB I sent him a heart on ...
A. 18 August 2017: PS. STOP SURVEILLING him! Facebook for 45 Minutes?!? Don't start clocking his actions with an egg timer! That shouts "clingy" to me!... (read in full...)
Am I too sensitive or he just rude?
Q. Would you be upset at your BF for ignoring a "Thinking of you" text you sent to him? I can see he opened it but he didn't respond. About an hour later, I saw he was on Facebook for 45 min til 11 p.m. While he was on FB I sent him a heart on ...
A. 18 August 2017: I call these little things "Loyalty tests".
You spent all day with the guy, and after you got home, you're texting and Facebook messaging him. You are insecure of his time away from you, as you have stated. Your talking to him were tests to... (read in full...)
I feel guilty for having feelings for my wife's sister!
Q. I am very happily married but I think I love my wife's sister. She is married to my friend who has changed over the years and treats her terrible. We were always close but now she confides in me all the time. She is always hugging me and rubbing my ...
A. 18 August 2017: Sorry, I deleted some of my message -- tell your wife's sister that you need to set the boundaries and that she needs to talk to her husband, not you, or you will.... (read in full...)
I feel guilty for having feelings for my wife's sister!
Q. I am very happily married but I think I love my wife's sister. She is married to my friend who has changed over the years and treats her terrible. We were always close but now she confides in me all the time. She is always hugging me and rubbing my ...
A. 18 August 2017: Uhh, any person on here with an opposite-sex sibling has just laughed out loud at this post!
This isn't Game of Thrones! No brothers and sisters are touchy-feely all over each other like you describe! And you need to draw a boundary and start AV... (read in full...)
Have I done the right thing in leaving this relationship?
Q. I've been in a relationship for 7 years. The relationship transpired from my girlfriend having an affair. She promised when separated that we would spend more time together. 7 yeas on and she hasn't told her children about me and her ex is around ...
A. 17 August 2017: Yes, I'd say that you *have* done the right thing.
She was never available for you in the first place, because separated is still married. My grandparents stayed married for 15 years, yet lived apart. You were the boy toy on the side for a ma... (read in full...)
Is my husband pretending?
Q. Sorry in advance if too much information! My husband and myself were having sex last night, usually he closes his eyes during sex, which used to bother me but he said it was just concentration on the pleasurable sensations, so it doesnt bother me...
A. 16 August 2017: I'm not a guy, but I close my eyes because I'm concentrating on the sensations! I'm not repulsed by what my husband looks like, nor do I need to think about others. Usually, good sex isn't about having rational thoughts in the first place, and to ... (read in full...)
He's a sweet person except when he's turned on!
Q. Dear Cupid(s), I am very confused. At the beginning of the year I met a guy and things seemed to be going really well. Both of us were virgins, and when we finally had sex it felt like that became all our entire relationship was about. I started...
A. 16 August 2017: There are a few things you said here that caught my eye, and I believe that they contain some of the heart of the issue here:
1. "Both of us were virgins, and when we finally had sex it felt like that became all our entire relationship was abou... (read in full...)
Each time I nearly had sex I pulled back .... now we have split up!
Q. Hi, Me and my now ex boyfriend broke up and it was a very hard decision for us to make because we love each other very much...We met about four months ago at work and we've been together for a month and a half before our break up. Everythi...
A. 13 August 2017: He was pressuring you for sex alright, both in talking about it and then in trying to get hot and heavy to get you to "lose control". He decided you weren't worth his time, and the truth is, he wasn't worth your virginity in the first place.
... (read in full...)
I'm still friends with an ex and my new girlfriend gets jealous!
Q. I've been with my new girlfriend for six month's, my ex am still friends with,she babysits my granddaughter, if she needs help I help her like today, I have a pickup, she bought a big snowblower, so I pick it up for her, I help other friends too, my ...
A. 13 August 2017: How would you feel if your current girlfriend needed a delivery of something, or something to fix around the house, or tired changed on her car, and instead of calling YOU, she called an ex-boyfriend? He'd come over, do the chore, and then he would ... (read in full...)
He said he's not going anywhere. What does he mean?
Q. My male friend and I have recently shared our inner most feelings to each other, and as it happens we feel the same way. This was accompanied by him interlocking our fingers, many hugs (him saying "I just want to hug/hold you"), holding me while ...
A. 12 August 2017: It means that he's in love with you and is willing to wait for the time it takes you to recover emotionally from the divorce. You offered him an out because you know how long and drawn-out the divorce can be, but he wants you.
The best thing yo... (read in full...)
I'm still friends with an ex and my new girlfriend gets jealous!
Q. I've been with my new girlfriend for six month's, my ex am still friends with,she babysits my granddaughter, if she needs help I help her like today, I have a pickup, she bought a big snowblower, so I pick it up for her, I help other friends too, my ...
A. 12 August 2017: I think that you won't find too many women who would accept that you are a "white knight" to an ex-girlfriend, and this ex-girlfriend should have a new guy who does things for her and not you.
You *say* that you'd be fine with your girlfrie... (read in full...)
Wife won't share "our" car. Is she being unfair?
Q. My wife doesn't work and hasn't for years despite us not having any kids. She quit her last job with my blessings. It was worth it to me just to not have to listen to her complain about it and I make a decent income such that she doesn't have to ...
A. 12 August 2017: PS, if you need an alternative solution to simply saying "I'm using the new car", since I know how marital politics gets, and you seem like a nice person, here's what to say as an alternative:
"Throughout our entire marriage, whenever we have got... (read in full...)
What will my boyfriend think of me that I don't have many friends?
Q. I am in a relationship and we have been together about three months. I feel a little bit insecure about the fact that i don't really have close female friends in the area (i work on my own, self employed) and where i live, i simply go to work, come ...
A. 12 August 2017: My son's a senior in high school too, or he will be once school starts in less than a month!
You'd be surprised at how easy it can be to get a social life, if you choose one. And don't discount your cleaning business! That *IS* high powered!... (read in full...)
What will my boyfriend think of me that I don't have many friends?
Q. I am in a relationship and we have been together about three months. I feel a little bit insecure about the fact that i don't really have close female friends in the area (i work on my own, self employed) and where i live, i simply go to work, come ...
A. 12 August 2017: On the contrary! It's widely noted that that is usually one of the biggest signs of extreme intelligence - to not have many friends. And if you work on your own and are self-employed (I too am a fellow business owner and would never trade working ... (read in full...)
I bought a house with my boyfriend, am falling out of love and have fallen for a man on the other side of the world
Q. Hi aunts and uncles, First off please no judgement I didn't expect any of this to happen Need some help here. So I'm 38 no married no kids but have just in the last three months purchased a house in my hometown with my partner of four...
A. 12 August 2017: This is what a mid-life crisis looks like. Women can have them just like men can, and it short-circuits our reason, intellect, and anything resembling logic or sound judgment.
First of all, let's just get the obvious out the way:
YOU ARE... (read in full...)
Wife won't share "our" car. Is she being unfair?
Q. My wife doesn't work and hasn't for years despite us not having any kids. She quit her last job with my blessings. It was worth it to me just to not have to listen to her complain about it and I make a decent income such that she doesn't have to ...
A. 12 August 2017: If the car belongs to both of you, and your name is on the title, then why are you ASKING her if you can take the car?? You've been unselfish in giving her the good car to drive, and I applaud that. I have a husband like yours, and you are truly a ... (read in full...)
Having sex all the time is really putting me off having sex
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together about seven months now. Things are kosher for the most part with a few small arguments here and there. One of the few things about the relationship that bother me is his sex drive. When we started dating I ...
A. 12 August 2017: The major problem I see here is -- you confused being the "best GF ever" with being the "best animated disposable sex toy ever". He does not respect you, especially if he's calling what you do with him physically "Putting out" and even joking about ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has his exes as friends on facebook.
Q. Is it okay for your partner to have exes on Facebook? I have an issue with my boyfriend having a woman he and his wife had a threesome with a few years ago (they are no longer together) being on his friend list. He also has an ex who had an abortion ...
A. 11 August 2017: Well, the question is - is it a dealbreaker for you if he has them on his Facebook??
You can't dictate what he does with his stuff, and you're not married to him, so there's no legal binding document that governs community property and so on th... (read in full...)
Is it strange to be 'vetted' by your partners family?
Q. Does anyone else think this is a little odd, basically I am in a new relationship with a lovely woman and she has told me that a certain person that she knows (I don't know if it is a family member or friend) has 'vetted' me to make sure I am who I ...
A. 10 August 2017: Ahh, I feel your pain and uncomfortability!
Vetting a partner has been done by family since the dawn of time, when the cavegirl's father interrogated the first caveman to make sure he wasn't some psycho, and that he could take care of his cave-dau... (read in full...)
I am trying to get over her betrayal so why is she driving past my house?
Q. Hi aunties, My long term partner left me 18 months ago for another man who she is still with. As far as I was concerned the relationship is over and there is no need to stay in touch. Every few months though she makes an effort to get in contact w...
A. 10 August 2017: It's her ego mixed with "buyer's remorse". That's happened to me before, and the guy would walk past my place of business trying to get a look at me working (even thinking about it sets my teeth on edge). She is daydreaming about "Unscrambling the ... (read in full...)
I blurted out I LOVE YOU to my married boyfriend. Why does he still want to be with me?
Q. I told my married boyfriend of 3.5 years that I LOVE HIM yesterday. It just came out. I did not mean to say it but I did. He was asking me why do I stay with a guy like him? He called himself average, boring, not so attractive yet said I am ...
A. 10 August 2017: My existence on this earth is because my dad cheated on his first wife with my mother. She didn't know it at the time, because he never told her he was married. He'd been married for 3 years because he got her pregnant, and in the 60's, you "made ... (read in full...)
My brother is about to be taken for a ride by an online Romanian stripper!
Q. My older brother is marrying a 21 year old stripper from Romania to bring her to the US. He met her on a webcam girl site. It is likely a romance/green card scam. He is really in a mid life crisis (48) and this is totally out of character for him. ...
A. 10 August 2017: Yeah, it sounds like he's into MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) if he's onto Red Pill sites on Reddit, and his backstory contains the baggage that usually follows men who turn to this philosophy, where having a relationship with women or marrying ... (read in full...)
I blurted out I LOVE YOU to my married boyfriend. Why does he still want to be with me?
Q. I told my married boyfriend of 3.5 years that I LOVE HIM yesterday. It just came out. I did not mean to say it but I did. He was asking me why do I stay with a guy like him? He called himself average, boring, not so attractive yet said I am ...
A. 9 August 2017: I'm really going to get a lot of backlash from fellow aunts about what I'm about to say, but in your case, the fact that you're so incredibly focused on being in love with him and worrying about how he'll react makes it incumbent upon me to shock ... (read in full...)
Trying to make me jealous?
Q. We can discuss virtually anything. We get along well, and just seem to "click" in a way that's unmistakable. We've been pretty open in discussion lately and it came out that we have feelings. However we are maintaining a friendship regardless. Whist ...
A. 6 August 2017: I think that the two of you are both trying to play a bit "hard to get", which is why you have feelings for him, yet are playing it off as a "friendship" and are so worried about whether or not he just wants sex from you. In the meantime, he has ... (read in full...)
Husband's new job takes him away from home.
Q. my husband of two and a half years has accepted a job as a cell phone tower climber and will be starting in two weeks. the job includes full benefits (which is a boost to my salary since we'll be dropping the benefits we have through my employer), ...
A. 5 August 2017: My father traveled a lot as well for my entire childhood, and while oftentimes he would leave on Monday and return on Friday, there were times when he'd leave for a month, or 3 weeks, or whatever, and would be gone out of state (or sometimes out of ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my husband's flirting?
Q. My next door neighbour's daughter, who is in her forties, constantly flirts with my husband. He flirts back but then denies he's done anything wrong. I have approached her and asked what she thinks she's playing at. She just laughed. It upsets me...
A. 4 August 2017: Your issue is between you and your husband, as he is the one you are married to. The fact that the other woman laughed when you confronted her instead of said either "I was not flirting with him, and I have no interest in him" or something to that ... (read in full...)
I have a fear that if we have sex it will be the end of our relationship
Q. I have just started seeing this guy and things are going well. We have met a few times now and the dates have been going out for dinner, a walk along the beach and the last one was he made me dinner at his. Physically, things have happened but...
A. 1 August 2017: Don't have sex until you're ready! AND -- don't have dates in compromising places, meaning don't go over to his house or have him over to yours. Keep the lights on wherever you go, and keep the talking subjects AWAY from sexuality!
You just sta... (read in full...)
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