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*lower girl agony aunt

*lower girl

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Hi everyone,

Oh my god over a year on since i first joined this site (where has the time gone) and i'm still loving it.

I got alot of help from all of the fantastic aunts and uncles when i needed it most, it was great getting everyone else's views on my situation at the time and it's great to see that those same people are still here doing the same fantastic job.

Due to what i have been through and the advise i have recieved off of here i am a much stronger person now and have so much more confidence in myself.

I am turning thirty this year i have a wonderful husband, yeah we have had our problems but thats life, and two fantastic children and i really believe my life is starting now and i cant wait for the rest of it.

Take care.xx.

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Do people who are in love have things in common?

Q.   Do people who are in love with each other have anything in common. Some people have told me that opposites attract but I have seen that it is not the true in some cases. The same could be refered to couples who have a lot in common. Can someone ...

A.   6 October 2007: I have met people that when i have spoken to them we could be peas in a pod, but there is absolutly nothing there romantically, me and my husband have some things in common but we are own people and we just gel and that is all it boils down to at ... (read in full...)

I've been attacked by my partner. Please help me.

Q.   I'm not sure that I can cope any more. I was attacked 3 weeks ago by my partner and substained some serious injuries. I had six stitches to my eye and lost my front tooth which I've had to have replaced by a false one. I thought that it was goin...

A.   6 October 2007: I'm afraid i can not offer you any advice because as i don't know what country you are from i have no idea on the legal proceedings, but you should discuss any worries you have with the officer leading this. What i would like to say though is Well... (read in full...)

Is it ok to take sleeping tablets with the contraceptive pill?

Q.   Hello, I was just wandering, is it ok to take sleeping tablets with the contraceptive pill? i dont want to go to my doctor and ask because its a waste of time (they told me that i waste their time everytime i go back for repeat prescriptions - ...

A.   6 October 2007: No problem babe if you have the names to give to me, i have quite a few different medical books i can always have a look and see what they say in them. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

How do I know if a date is going to be a future relationship?

Q.   I went on a date last night. It was OK but the conversation stopped frequently. It might have been a combination of reservedness and the loud music in the club. Another factor could be that we just didn't find each other interesting. I'm thinking...

A.   6 October 2007: If you are that concerned that the second date will end up like the first, you could just try asking her out for a cup of cofffee or something, it does not have to be a long date just an hour and see how things go, first dates can be awkward so it ... (read in full...)

Is it ok to take sleeping tablets with the contraceptive pill?

Q.   Hello, I was just wandering, is it ok to take sleeping tablets with the contraceptive pill? i dont want to go to my doctor and ask because its a waste of time (they told me that i waste their time everytime i go back for repeat prescriptions - ...

A.   6 October 2007: If you still have the advice labels for your contraceptive pill check on that, or you could try tapping the name into a search engine on the net it should give you the answers you are looking for, and if your doctors think you are wasting time by ... (read in full...)

My wife climaxes fast and I'd like your advise on how to extend it.

Q.   hi, i am 35 years old healthy male. Married for 9 years. Me and my wife have sex for 5-6 days in a week. My wife climaxes almost every time and she throughly enjoys the occasion. My concern is she climaxes fast and i want your advise on how to ...

A.   6 October 2007: Can you ask your wife to tell you when she is about to climax and then maybe you could slow it down a bit, i have found the more times you are brought to the verge, when you finally get there it is a million times better as well. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Why did my ex-girlfriend lie?

Q.   hello there, 3 months ago my ex broke up with me just as we rented out a place together, she never really given me a satisfying answer she just kept on saying it's her and not me. I thought maybe my temper brought it on. Also, she just joined a...

A.   5 October 2007: Hey it's usually the way, you want something you can't have and don't realise what you had until it's gone, thought the grass was greener, get the drift? Maybe she has realised that she wants you and if thats the case and you would consider taki... (read in full...)

My boyfriend isn't motivated.

Q.   My boyfriend and I have been together for two and a half years. We met when I was 16 and he was 17. At first things were great, and somethings still are. However, he isn;t motivated to do anything with his life. It's been like this for almost a ...

A.   5 October 2007: Unfortunately some people do need to be told, because if they are not they are happy to just plod along especially if no one around them are telling them anything different. Tell him that you can not and are not willing to support him and he need... (read in full...)

Holding out until marriage, but the plans haven't begun.

Q.   I have been with my fiance for 6 years and engaged for 2 and a half of them. We have never had sex. She says she wants to wait until marriage and I agreed to that. So I proposed with the intention of getting married soon after. Now its 2-1/2 ye...

A.   5 October 2007: Relationships can't be one sided so you really do need to sit her down and tell her exactly how you are feeling, you need to know where you stand, because if it carries on like this for much longer you are just going to end up resenting her and if ... (read in full...)

I love my boyfriend so why do I have a crush?

Q.   Ive been going out with my boyfriend for a few years now and everything in great, we're stronger than ever and Im sure he's "the one", my problem is this: A couple of months ago a new guy joined my firm and Ive developed a stupid crush on him...we...

A.   5 October 2007: Hey it's perfectly natural to have a crush, even when you are in love with someone it will pass and like you have said you would not cheat and you are going out of your way to stay clear of him so there is no problem. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Big trust issues over my girlfriend's past relationships...advice?

Q.   Alright, I haven't been with my "girlfriend" for long, but it is most definitely serious and have already made plans.. The topic for discussion here is not that I'm jumping into it to quick or anything. She is 9 Years older than me, and maybe that ...

A.   4 October 2007: Ok when you start seeing someone, you really do need to forget about their past if you want your relationship to work, unfortunatley too many people worry about the past, it's called the past for a reason and why should what she done before you two ... (read in full...)

Am I dumb to believe that my husband had a condom in his wallet because he uses them "to masturbate" with??

Q.   My husband and I have been married for 5 years. We have a two dear old daughter and I am six months pregnant. We have defiently had some rough patches and I am some infedielty fears from a previous relationship. I have accused him of cheating ...

A.   4 October 2007: My husband was having an affair for ages before it actually came out, he never used to keep his phone on him he was always at work or at home, i had my suspicions but always dismissed them because i thought he does not have time, then i found out it ... (read in full...)

I keep straying to other men.

Q.   i am married for the second time and have four children i love my husband he is 1 in a million, but i cant stop straying to different men, i dont no what to do i think about it all the time, what can i do?...

A.   4 October 2007: I totally agree with uncle phil, phone or text sex is definatly cheating just because it is not pysical does not make it any better, if you are honest with yourself how would you view it if it was your husband that was doing it, would you just turn ... (read in full...)

I'm in love with someone who makes me so happy... yet, so miserable as well. What do you think?

Q.   I need serious advice on how to handle this. I am in love with someone who makes me so happy yet so miserable at the same time. I lovemy girlfriend. Infact she is everything I could ever want right now. Problem is she fucked things up at the...

A.   30 September 2007: Right i'm going to tell you what i think and you might think it's aload of crap, but here goes anyway.... You are both still young and when you got together maybe she did not want to open up about her past relationships because she was worried abou... (read in full...)

Ideas to look older? (make up, clothes, hairstyles)

Q.   i am 14 years old i look a bit younger i want to look 14 or older but i still have a bit of a baby face i am about 5'2 so i am a bit small but i am still growing and i am thin too.my hair is longish but i want it longer.please can someone give me ...

A.   29 September 2007: I think personally that long hair can make you look quite young, would you not consider having a shorter style that is maybe shaped to your face abit, that would probably make you look older. I do agree with Ms. sweet dreams about the make up ther... (read in full...)

They broke up a year ago, he's still not over her, should I give up or stick with him?

Q.   I have been seeing a wonderfull good man for 5 months now. He is not over his ex. He spent 15 years with her, she was his only other girlfriend other than myself. They have been apart over a year. They have no contact with each other. The ...

A.   29 September 2007: Only you can decide that babe, how long are you prepared to wait? Tell him how you feel again, and let him know that if he can not commit to you 100% and leave the past in the past then you have no future, you could suggest having a break while he s... (read in full...)

Will it hurt my boys not to have a male influence in their lives?

Q.   Curiosity question here. I am currently separated from my husband and seriously considering divorce. Of course at this time in my life I feel like I don't ever want another man in for life for as long as I live. Every experience I've EVER had ...

A.   29 September 2007: I totally agree with everything rcn has said to you, it's much better for your boys to just have a happy single mummy, rather then a male figure around that you are not totally happy with just because you feel they need that. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

13 years of marriage, she tells me now about a one night stand before we got together.

Q.   I'm totally freaked out. My wife of 13 years just admitted that a few days prior to our getting together she had a one night stand(drunk) with a high school friend of ours who she barely knew. She has NEVER told me this even though we dated for 4 ...

A.   29 September 2007: I can understand why she did not tell you, 13 years later and you are livid about it, she probably thought if she had told you at the time she would lose you for good. Have you never been drunk and done something you regret that you do not want anyo... (read in full...)

Will his girlfriends think I'm immature?

Q.   Hi everyone, I'm in an age gap relationship. I am 18, and my boyfriend is in his 20s. Everything is wonderful so far, we've been dating for about 7 months. I've met his family, he's met mine, he's met my friends, everyone gets along, wo...

A.   29 September 2007: I was i the same situation when i met my husband, i was 16 he was 20 and i was nervous as hell about meeting his friends and most of them were in their twenties some pushing on thirty. They were all however fantastic, i was just myself with the atti... (read in full...)

I keep straying to other men.

Q.   i am married for the second time and have four children i love my husband he is 1 in a million, but i cant stop straying to different men, i dont no what to do i think about it all the time, what can i do?...

A.   29 September 2007: You love your husband and he is one in a million, but there must be something lacking for you to feel this way, so you need to try and indentify what it is and go from there babe. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

For his 16th he wants to eat at every fast food place in the area.

Q.   In three weeks time my 15-year-old son will become 16. I've asked him what he wants to do for his birthday, and he said he wants to eat out at every McDonald's, Burger King and Pizza Hut in the area. I've said to him he can go to one of those r...

A.   29 September 2007: Tough love, if he wont chose just one, tell him that you will not do anything for his birthday, i know thats harsh but hey sometimes our little angels need that to make them realise. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Will she ever leave her husband for me?

Q.   I met a beautiful married woman 5 years ago in a restaurant on a Saturday. She was from a neighboring state. We talked and clicked. She was perfect - we fell in love. She has an a**hole for a husband. We stayed in touch and she visits when she...

A.   29 September 2007: Hmm, 'she has an arsehole for a husband'. Let me ask you have you ever met him, or is this just what she tells you. Do you really think if she turned round to you and said my husband is a wonderful man and treats me so well, you would be so willi... (read in full...)

It was a week after her period, could she still get pregnant?

Q.   My girlfriend and I had unprotected sex last night. Is it possible that she could get pregnant even though it was almost a week after her period?...

A.   29 September 2007: Absolutely any time of the month it is possible for her to get pregnant, go and see your gp together and get some advice and a test. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

SITE NEWS: Wanted, your ideas for features and improvements!

Q.   Hi I'm looking to get some input from everyone on what you'd like to see on the site. How can I make it easier to use? What new features would you like to see? Any annoyances or bugs you'd like to fix? Can I make the moderati...

A.   29 September 2007: Don't know if it's already there, but for the mods is there a quick route back to home page without having to back arrow. Sorry if i'm being blonde and it's already there. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Why do people think the unattached person in a love triangle is a victim?

Q.   Why is it that people get involved in love triangles and feel rejected when they don't work out? Why do so many agony aunts treat the third member of the triangle as a victim? I'm tired of hearing people reccommend.... "distance yourself from hi...

A.   29 September 2007: Oh i so aggree with everything you have said eddie, i certainly do not treat the women that came into my marriage and very nearly distroyed it as a victim, she new my husbabnd was married so she got what she deserved. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

I don't know what to do. My guy keeps dumping me because he doesn't like my mates?

Q.   ok here goes its really weired but i think i still love this guy, i have already been out with him twice and both times he has dumped me for the most stupidest reason e.g. he had a argument with my bestfriend then dumped me for it. i really don` t ...

A.   29 September 2007: He keeps dumping you, your friends fancy him, and you are not sure you want to go through it again, so my suggestion to you would be find someone that will treat you with a little respect and not just get rid of you for silly reasons babe. Take care... (read in full...)

Should I run a mile, or give him another chance?

Q.   Hello everyone, need a little advice here as I'm not sure what to do. Split up from my ex about ten months ago and friends suggested going on a dating site.. Anyway I've had a lot of fun chatting to men, but some are just downright disrespectful and ...

A.   29 September 2007: If the picture made you feel uncomfortable i would suggest having nothing more to do with him, i find it a little strange that someone would send a picture like that to someone they have only met once, and i think it would freak me out. At the end ... (read in full...)

What's the difference?, someone please explain.

Q.   ok this is probably one of the most stupid questions you will have ever read but could you please try to answer it! What is actually the different between making love and just sex? I know it all involves the same thing but alot of people say its ...

A.   29 September 2007: I aggree with Jamer 70, that is exactly what i would have said. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

Is he trying to get out of the relationship?

Q.   I think my relationship has run its course, though I'm scared to say it. We're nothing at all like we were when we first started seeing each other- we were spontaneous, amorous, happy- everything lovers should be. We are each other's first ...

A.   29 September 2007: Hi babe I don't think you are over dramatising at all, we have all been there in relationships that are not working out and it makes us feel like crap. You say you have a text from last year saying you will always be together as that's the way it's... (read in full...)

Is it weird I don't want a guys night out? My buddies are upset when my wife comes out with me!

Q.   Is it weird i don't want a guys night out? I'm 24 and married. I'm a very social guy and prefer group dates and parties and just generally any situation that involves a lot of people. My friends that I have from before meeting my wife will som...

A.   19 September 2007: It's not wrong that you do not want to do the guys night out thing if thats what you chose, but i do feel if your unmarried friends want to go out and invite you, just the lads then you should respect that and not take your wife or don't go out. V... (read in full...)

I feel like a reject everytime he's not in a good mood cause he doesn't want to be near me! What should I do?

Q.   A major problem I had with my last bf was that when ever he was upset he wouldnt want to be around me or anyone. He would just want to be alone. I always took this really personally. And if he was around you when he wasnt happy, he would be really ...

A.   19 September 2007: Sometimes men feel it is a weakness if they are upset so they chose to be on their own so they can deal with it, and i think all of us need time out on our own sometimes, so i would not take it too personally to be honest. If he wants to be on his ... (read in full...)

When will the pill take effect? I started it on the 2nd day of my period.

Q.   Hey! I have just gone on the pill this week and i started it on the 2nd day of my period, i was just wondering when it will be effective? As i've heard within 7 days and i've also heard after the first pack......

A.   18 September 2007: If you put the name of your pill into a google search it should give you the answers you are looking for babe, most pills are about seven days but it is always best to check, if you still have the box look at the information leaflet inside that will ... (read in full...)

I'm with someone but my ex from 4 yrs ago is back in my life and is 'the one' but I worry that my weight is an issue?

Q.   About 4 years ago I had a boyfriend, long story short we were perfect for each other. Matters beyond eithers control we couldn't be together for a minute but before we could get back toegther I had to move and we lost contact. Flash forward 4 years ...

A.   18 September 2007: You should not feel like a disappointment to him because of your weight which like you say is due to a medical problem, if he says he loves you then he should love you warts and all and not make you feel this way as that is not true love. When i... (read in full...)

Sometimes during sex I stay quite dry. Advice?

Q.   I'm in my 20's and am in a serious realationship. We have been together 2 years and I love him very much. My problem is sex. I do enjoy it but sometimes when we try to have sex I stay quite dry (therefore its not very easy to do anything) and ...

A.   16 September 2007: The best thing to use on those occasions is lube. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

My belly-button peircing is painful and red. Any advice?

Q.   In June (2007) I got my belly-button pierced. It is now September and it's still red around the piercing and is still sore if I bump it accidentally (which I do all too often). It's not bleeding, or oozing, but every couple of days there's a little ...

A.   12 September 2007: It might well be your body rejecting the piercing, i remember when i had mine done it was the same and i carried on with the cleaning of it and then one night about five months after i took it out to give it a good clean, and i swear to god it ... (read in full...)

I had an abortion but we are trying for a baby. Is it possible to get pregnant so soon?

Q.   I HAD RECENTLY HAD AN ABORTION LATE AUGUST. I REALLY FEEL DEVESTATED ABOUT WHAT IVE DONE BECAUSE OF MY PARENTS OPINIONS. BUT ME AND MY BOYFRIEND IS TRYING TO CONCEIVE AGAIN THIS MONTH IS IT POSSIBLE TO GET PREGNANT SO SOON? Can you not use caps nex...

A.   10 September 2007: Why are you so suddenly wanting to get pregnant after just having an abortion? I think you need to consider why you had the abortion in the first place and why you really want a baby now. Don't rush into anything as this is a life you are talking ... (read in full...)

I had a stupid one night stand when I was drunk! Will I get over feeling guilt and shame?

Q.   I feel so guilty. I got totally drunk (never ever been that drunk before) that I can hardly remember anything of my night. But what I do know is that I have stupidly had a drunken one night stand! I cant believe I was so stupid- it is so out of ...

A.   10 September 2007: Hey babe, try not to worry about it, it's all part of growing up and we have all been there and done it before. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and just put it down to experience and don't feel guilty about it. Take care.xx.... (read in full...)

I think I messed up on the second date. Tell me what you think?

Q.   Just wondering here... If I were to really screw up our second date so she no longer talks to me (not sure what I did exactly, but I know I did something wrong) do you think there is anything I could say to get a fresh start? Our last date was 3 ...

A.   10 September 2007: Oh dear, if you really like her then give it a shot, send her some flowers with a note attached to it explaining yourself and tell her you are sorry and if she is willing to give you a second chance to call you, if you here nothing then i'm affraid ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend might be moving away. Should I go with him? We have been together a year.

Q.   Im 21 and moved to kent 2 yrs ago i have a 2 yr old son and his father has no contact with him. when i moved here i never thought i would meet anyone but i did and i love him to bits. he has three children two of which live with their mum who now ...

A.   10 September 2007: It is a big step to take, and only you can make that decision, if you feel it is right for you and it is what you both want, then you should go for it. Sometimes we have to take a chance in life, if we don't we will kick ourselves later on in life... (read in full...)

I lost my virginity and now have bloating. Anyone got any advice please?

Q.   Hey, I lost my virginity nearly 2 weeks ago... it was protected sex, but i am now suffering from severe bloating. I also suffer from irrital bowel syndrome so do you think this is the problem? The condom did not break or slip off so should i be w...

A.   10 September 2007: You are not the first and will not be the last women to be worried about pregnancy after losing your virginity. The bloating you are having could be due to an imminent period and it is also a symptom of IBS and you worrying about pregnancy will not ... (read in full...)

He's a great dad and a great guy but I don't think I love him anymore! Help!

Q.   I have been married 6 years now. We met when I was barely 20 and were married 2 years after. We have two children (one from his previous marriage)and I'm trying to act like I'm happy in my marriage for them. I just don't know how long I can do ...

A.   10 September 2007: Yeah you can stay because you think that it will make everyone else happy, but what about you do you not think that you deserve to be happy also??? You will not do any of you any favours in staying in a marriage that you are no longer happy in, and ... (read in full...)

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