Like what
he writes?
... Add *ddie to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *ddie a private message | | | *ddie's profile:Hi there. I go by Eddie. I'm from Canada. I have a great wife and two great kids, both teenagers. I've been with my wife for 21 years and we dated for two years before that.
I enjoy travel and learning new things. Different cultures interest me and what makes them tick. I think there is always a reason for the way certain cultures do things and many times we are too quick to judge things that we find odd.
The more places I go and the more people I meet, the more I see that we are so similar. Everybody is trying to enjoy life but we are all influenced along the way by the stuff that "happens". The trick is to learn from the lessons and carry on. I have a short fuse for infedility and take marriage very seriously. It's not from personal experiences either. I just don't understand why people don't seem to fix the problems in their marriages before they create more. I see lots of questions on this site pertaining to this topic, that's why I added this part. |
|
| Latest articles: Why do people think the unattached person in a love triangle is a victim?
This question has 9 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 September 2007: Why is it that people get involved in love triangles and feel rejected when they don't work out? Why do so many agony aunts treat the third member of the triangle as a victim? I'm tired of hearing people reccommend.... "distance yourself from hi...
Fidelity and marriage
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 May 2007: Many times, we see questions asking for advice about marriage, monotony and fidelity. I tend to be cut and dry on this topic and often without compassion for the person struggling in this area. What bothers me most, is the ability of people to ...
|
He's even ignoring our kids to spend time upstairs ranting in his room, about everything. This is his constant behaviour. How do I deal?
Q. I've been married to my husband for a month now, and things have been great so far... until now. We've got a three-year-old daughter and a four-year-old son. However, recently my husband's changed. He's began ranting about everything and a...
A. 8 November 2007: This sounds strange. There might be something really bothering your husband or perhaps he has some sort of mental problem. It sounds like you might need some third party help. ... (read in full...)
We played truth or dare, what did my wife get up to?
Q. Hi. A bunch of us (about 12-14 people) were playing Truth or Dare a week ago at our house. My wife and I are happily married for a few years, and this is not the first time we have had 'semi-wild' parties (read, not swinger parties, just 'fun' ...
A. 5 November 2007: Well..........the game ain't so fun now. You're playing the what if game now and you can't win. It's the risk you take and the truth hurts. It's quite possible they did any number of things and it's also possible she enjoyed it. It's also ... (read in full...)
I get worried but I don't want to stop her from doing things.
Q. I have been goin out with my girlfriend for 11 months now. We have both made it clear what we want from this relationship and how much we love one another, But everytime she says shes goin out drinking with her friends i get paranoid and it leads to ...
A. 5 November 2007: You can not control people based on your demands,expectations or fears. If she is not acting out of line you have no reason to stop her form enjoying life. You will scare her away. You do need to set boundaries though so she knows where to put ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend said he needs to sample the single life before we marry, now he's sleeping around, I love him but should I wait?
Q. Ok I am in an odd situation... I've been with my boyfriend since high school and we have a great relationship we don't have many big fights. We are both second year university students now and he and I have been talking about the possibility of ...
A. 4 November 2007: He is not walking all over you because he's been honest. If you wait for him, that would be a mistake. As painful as it may be, go about your life and carry on. It won't thrill him but that is not his business. He has a right to do as he pleases ... (read in full...)
Why didn't they hit on me when I was single?
Q. Hello, things seem to be every confusing and betrayed... Lately I have Cute guys after me and i thought about it, how come they didnt hit on me when i was single? ...
A. 4 November 2007: What difference does it make if you're already with another guy? That means you must be happy. There is nothing anyone can say to answer taht question. Be happy that you have found someone.... (read in full...)
I feel stupid like I've acted like a teenager.
Q. please give some advice i am currently going through a seperation after 14 years together because weve become friends not lovers. we have 3 young children together. during this seperation ive become attached to a guy 7 years younger than me hes ...
A. 4 November 2007: You're trying to build one relationship before the other is officially dead. You've built this up in your head to the point that you're already getting angry at this guy who you've never even met with yet. Did I get that part correct? He's in his ... (read in full...)
Married but enamoured. What to do?
Q. i am in a troubled marriage, and there's this ex-supervisor of mine whom i really have a great sexual desire (lust) and so as he on me. we've been communicating thru text messaging, internet chat for the past 2 months now (on and off), and we see ...
A. 3 November 2007: You're behaving like a horny teenager. You need to take a look at yourself and make some better choices. You have already cheated on your husband....morally that is. If you've been communicating with another man about desires toward him, that's ... (read in full...)
Fear and Jealousy of losing my girlfriend during "open" stage of our relationship.
Q. Hey everyone! Im 23 male..I appreciate all you people who answer questions on this site...its soo great to be able to collaborate on this crazy game of love and life!! I am in an open relationship right now with a girl I absolutely adore...
A. 3 November 2007: People with a free spirit live for feelings. You can't control these people with jealousy or strict rules. If you don't want her to sleep around, then tell her. If sex with strangers is more important to her than committing to you, you have your ... (read in full...)
My ex is getting engaged and I don't know what to do?
Q. I dated my first love off and on for five years. After finding out that he had been lying to me and hanging out with this girl I flipped out and we broke up. He told me that he wasn't ready to settle down yet and that he needed five years to do ...
A. 3 November 2007: If you don't want to stay with your boyfriend, move on. Don't confuse this with your old BF though. People say stupid things when they break up to help cushion the blow to the person they're leaving...."he needed five years to do whatever he ... (read in full...)
Is it unfair to think my husband should stand up for me?
Q. My husband has a new business partner, who I sense does not like me. We are in each other's company a lot. Last night the partner made a very negative comment to me and about me, in front of my husband. My husband obviously knew I would be upset, ...
A. 3 November 2007: It would be very helpful to know what the comments were. This would help to answer the question and give us a clear picture of your state of mind and what was said. In a forum like this, we only get your slant on things.... (read in full...)
I want to feel loved and appreciated and at the moment I don't!
Q. Hi I'm a 28 year old male living with my partner for 1 year. I have a few problems I guess, I feel she doesn't care about my needs. Firstly she is very fatalistic/depressed: I hate myself, I'm ugly, fat etc... all the time even though I have ...
A. 2 November 2007: This is a tricky situation. You are a doer because that is how you are wired. I am too. I once became resentful toward my wife because I felt like she never did the extras for me. I let this resentment build until it exploded on day. The fall ... (read in full...)
Guys... If you don't want sex, but you are looking elsewhere, is it because you are bored of your own girl?
Q. My boyfriend and I have a business together and spend almost 24 hours together. We are like best friends, we have a good laugh together, we travel the world together, share the same goals in life, and enjoy each other's company. We've known each ...
A. 2 November 2007: You need to establish if he loves you. He will always have some amount of sex on his mind and it might not always involve you. Guys can think about sex in a very general way. It's just fantasy. You need to talk to him about this.
What happens ... (read in full...)
Was I a fool?
Q. i went to visit my long distant boyfriend for almost two months, whilst in that country and a few days after i had arrived i realized he was seeing another lady. i confronted the lady when she called the house and told my boyfriend to put a stop to ...
A. 2 November 2007: You can not control what people do or think. You thought that you could force him to care. He didn't have the integrity to care in the first place. People like him do not understand what love means. They will only understand the damage they ... (read in full...)
I'm afraid I may make a mistake.
Q. Hi, I'm currently engaged to my fiance' of 2 months and girlfriend of 2 years. Through out the entire relationship I've had feelings for different people, and most of these feelings come and go. Is this normal and healthy? does this mean i'm not ...
A. 1 November 2007: Well one thing is for sure, whatever you do in the future won't be a "mistake" because you're already aware of the potential. It will be a "choice" and that's a different thing altogether. Mistakes are acts made out of ignorance. Choices area ... (read in full...)
I had sex with my husband's best friend - it was his idea - will I find a need for more men?
Q. A family friend, who was widowed about ten months ago, visits us about once a month when he comes to the city on business. After dinner last month, he expressed to my husband how difficult it was to meet a woman and how frustrating it was to have ...
A. 1 November 2007: I'm having a difficult time believing this is a real question. It just sounds too "out there".
If it's true, you don't have permission to do it again. This is what we refer to as a can of worms, genie out of the bottle type thing. It can get ... (read in full...)
A have a serious crush on a guy at work but I'm married!
Q. I have been married almost three years, I have a two year old and my relationship with my husband is great. I have a crush on a guy at work. A serious crush. I'm talkin' when I unexpectedly see him, I get flustered and I can't concentrate. When I a...
A. 30 October 2007: If you think he knows it's because you're giving him hints. There will always be men who you're attracted to....so what. LOVE is much bigger than sex. You said your relationship with your husband is great. Then don't mess it up by screwing some ... (read in full...)
She cheated and I'm scared of making the wrong decision.
Q. My wife of 5 years has had an affair. I'm devestated, but prepared to forgive (I think). Just one thing I can't get over, I don't want every gorey detail, but when I ask her to explain why she did it, she says. 'I don't know, It just happened...
A. 30 October 2007: Lets' make one thing clear. If you are a reasonable, decent husband, she OWES you an explanation. She is no place to be bargaining or letting her self off the hook with an ..."I don't know why it happened"
She did not just walk out the door and... (read in full...)
I'm in love with a married friend.
Q. I have been close friends and work colleague with a woman for many years but my love for her has now become a problem because I think of little else these days. We spend time at work together and meet socially as friends. To make matters more...
A. 30 October 2007: Don't be confused. This is not what you want to hear but I'll be honest. Take your nose out of her business. She is obviously a cheater and a rotten wife. Why would you want a woman who does this to her husband and kids? Her integrity is ... (read in full...)
My bf is going to see his ex at a wedding, should I be worried?
Q. I'm not sure if I'm looking for people who have been through the same thing, or if I'm looking for advice. Any kind of reply would be appreciated. My b/f of 3 years is very close with his ex girlfriend's cousin. This cousin is getting married ...
A. 30 October 2007: You shot yourself in the foot by turning down the invitation to the wedding. Your boyfriend has done nothing wrong but you're really over reacting and only looking at the worst case scenario. They will talk and socialize, why shouldn't they? Why ... (read in full...)
I hid my son from him, and when he found out he treated me badly and was uncompassionate towards me. How could he??
Q. Hi I was seeing this guy for over 2 a months.He was saying how I was the girl for him and how much he realy liked me.There was something I kept from him and that was that I had a son. I was quiet lonely before I met him and I wanted the feeling ...
A. 29 October 2007: There was a reason you didn't tell him. What was it? Maybe you can answer your own question.... (read in full...)
Is he kidding or is he serious?
Q. Hi There's this guy at work, (just a friend) who say he would like to ask me out, but that i'm too good looking and would make him work like a mule to keep me. So it wouldn't be worth it, because I would eventually end up with some handsome gu...
A. 29 October 2007: AskEve is right on. He's sounding you out or almost issuing a challenge, daring you to date him. If you like him, date him.... (read in full...)
Husband acting strange about escourt wife's activities.
Q. i am working in an in-call escort service and i am married. i love my hubbie and we have a pretty good sex life, but he is getting older and wants sex less frequently. but that is no problem for me, since as an escort i am getting all the sex i ...
A. 28 October 2007: This has to be a joke....You're worried about your husbands fantasies??? I'd be more concerned about HIV or whatever else you might get. If this true and I doubt it is, have you made your life better or worse. Somehow I don't think you'd know. ... (read in full...)
Why do our cultures teach boys that women who are sexually active are "damaged goods”?
Q. I have seen so many postings by men of all ages who are having problems dealing with the sexual past of their girlfriends or wives. As many of you know from reading my posts, I have been one of them. These teachings were figuratively beat into my ...
A. 28 October 2007: Men like to walk about town like a peacock when it comes to their woman. As soon as the peacock comes across another peacock who slept with his wife previously, let's just say some feathers fall out. It's hard to feel secure/proud etc when you ... (read in full...)
I want to orgasm without having to do the work myself, advice on positions please?
Q. When i want to have an orgasm I need to rub my clitoris with my fingers or use a vibrator at the same time while having sex. My boyfriend says he has never experienced this before. What position can I try that will rub my clitoris without having to ...
A. 26 October 2007: Most women don't have orgasms by straight intercourse. Stimulation is most often need to the clitoris. This is normal. If you're trying to buy in to what you see in movies or where ever, don't. If you think it's difficult for you, imagine how ... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a guy to say that to his true lover during oral? Makes me feel uncomfortable.
Q. is it normal that my guy says "f_cker" while we were doing oral sex? i feel very uncomfortable to hear that. its sounds like im a prostitute..so i wonder is it normal to a guy say that to his true lover?? thanks for help!!...
A. 25 October 2007: It probably just turns him on to talk a little dirty. There's nothing wrong with it except....his partner, you, don't like it. So if he's trying to make the event more sexy and he's actually doing the opposite, talk to him. I'm sure he'd rather ... (read in full...)
She says she'd never cheat on me.
Q. Hi i am a 28yo Male who has been in a live in relationship for 1 year. I was cheated on in my last relationship and I found out early on that my current girlfriend had cheated on her last boyfriend and one when she was in her teens. My proble...
A. 24 October 2007: Much of this depends on the age when was when these things happened. Cheating is cheating but the severity changes when you're not married. When we're young we're supposed to date and explore. It's best to be honest though and finish one ... (read in full...)
Should I read too much into this?
Q. I was eating in a restaurant with my guy who can't say he loves me (A question from last week. He tells me to drive carefully - out of the blue - or something similar all the time.) the other night and we were discussing our daughters whose ...
A. 24 October 2007: Nobody really knows. Just be happy that you're on the same page as far as your desires for a future wedding. If you want to be with him, that's a good thing. If the romance is going fine, just enjoy his company be thankful you've got a nice ... (read in full...)
I've decided to divorce my husband. Any advice to make it easier?
Q. I've decided to divorce my husband. It's definately not an easy decision to come to, but I know that it will never work between him and me. I was just wondering if anyone who has gone through a divorce has any advice to give about the whole thing. ...
A. 24 October 2007: That is the problem with a vague question, it leaves out important details making it difficult to give specific answers. What is the reason for the divorce and the history of the marriage. I'm assuming by your age you were not married long.... (read in full...)
He joked about race and women, so I ended it due to cultural differences and miscommunication. No we're back together, am I being too sensitive?
Q. I'm in a confused state and feel like I'm in a no win situation with my boyfriend. We had an intense relationship for three months then, due to huge cultural differences and miscommunication, I ended it. It was just too hard being with him. He'd ...
A. 24 October 2007: It would be nice to have a couple examples of what his remarks about nationality or race are. Being English is not a race. I'm white Canadian and my wife is a Latin woman from the Caribbean, a typical mixture of North American Indian/Spanish/B... (read in full...)
We kissed, I told him how I felt but we agreed things couldn't go further because he's getting married. How can I see him as just a friend?
Q. I spoke to a collegue of mine (who I'd liked for ages) for the first time at the very beginning of the year and we immediately clicked. We get on so well and have become quite good friends. I go for lunch with him and a few others quite regularly ...
A. 23 October 2007: The first thing you should do is STOP letting yourself off the hook and calling him a friend. He is no friend and neither are you. You're two people playing a secretive game behind his fiancées back. IS that nice?
You may have started out inno... (read in full...)
He feels he didn't do anything wrong because he didn't have sex.
Q. I luv and am stil inlove with my husband.But he hurt me and i feel betrayed. About 2mths ago i caught him having inappropriate conversations with women in chatrooms downloaded on his cellphone.I went thru his cell while he was sleeping cos he didnt ...
A. 23 October 2007: I agree with Irish49 100 per cent. Let me add one thing though. If you have an already non existent sex life, focus on that. There is a good possibility that's where the problems begin. Where did things go off track and why? Is there anything ... (read in full...)
I don't like my boyfriend looking at other women!
Q. I don't like it when my boyfriend looks at other girls in public, I find it humiliating. If I initiate sex or give him a blow job before we go out, is there less chance that he will look at other girls because he's just had an orgasm? Or would it ...
A. 23 October 2007: What would you consider to be more degrading, being reduced to a position of "having" to give him a blow job so he doesn't glance at other women or just letting him have the occasional glance? It is probably more insulting that you'd resort to ... (read in full...)
Strange question.
Q. I have weird question. Is it true that if you kiss a girl that did oral sex in the past, you will be kissing back her partner's private part?...
A. 21 October 2007: No, you're kissing her mouth that has kissed/sucked a penis etc. What do you think about when you eat from a fork in a restaurant? Are you eating from a utensil that has been in the mouth of someone who has ........whatever? When you shake a ... (read in full...)
I need help with an inter-racial decision.
Q. I need opinions on Inter-racial dating. I am a mexican/white girl. I have been goin out with man of black skin for the past month. I really think he is cool. However, the people in town do not always apporove. Also my mexican friend revolts and ...
A. 21 October 2007: My wife is hispanic, I'm white. Where she comes from, the people are of Indian/African/Spanish blood. Nobody really cares about color, hair, eyes etc. People who worry about the ethnic background of someone else's partner are bigots. Don't buy ... (read in full...)
We're not intimate and it's driving me nuts.
Q. I have been married 18 years and have 2 kids 13 and 11. the past 3 years my wife has become more distant, like when i arrive home after work, i would have given her a kiss and cuddle,she would shrug me off with an excuse.we have not had a sex life ...
A. 21 October 2007: First of all, women need to know they have the sexual power on this planet. Usually, in a relationship, they carry the torch and decide the frequency of sex.(Like it or not. Be thankful too, could you imagine the opposite !!) This can be ... (read in full...)
Is it abuse when I have no voice?
Q. Was he abusive? I need reassurance that he was abusive, that it wasn't my fault. I am no longer with my fiance (thank God), but moving on and sorting out all that has happened is still hard. The weekend before I broke up with him we went with his ...
A. 19 October 2007: Nobody can tell you if there was any abuse. Did he escort you by the arm? Did he take both hands and ram then in to your back as you were going out the door. The truth is hard to get at in these scenarios. The men usually lose too, not always ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to let him know I'm attracted even though he's unavailable?
Q. Is it wrong that I always stare at this guy I have a huge crush on when he has a girlfriend? I'm not 'talk-flirting' with him or anything I just always stare at him when I see him and he usually looks back. Is it wrong that I do this when he is ...
A. 19 October 2007: It's not wrong to like him or be attracted to him. Of course it's wrong to try and destruct their relationship. The high road says you're supposed to keep your nose out of their relationship. The dark side of our society and what's become almost ... (read in full...)
I keep masturbating, and that means I keep sinning. How BAD of a sin is Masturbation?
Q. Hi im ak, im 13 years old and last year i started masturbating...Its something i started to do 1 day its a long story...I LOVE God with all my heart and Masturbation is normal but its also a sin when not married..I keep repeating this sin, i ask ...
A. 19 October 2007: The bible is great, so are the books and teachings of other religions. I think they need to be seen as guides on how to live well and treat others. People argue religious points from all angles. Nobody really knows. People believe, imagine or ... (read in full...)
I want to know thats its better than fine, why is he not vocal?
Q. I used to love giving my partner oral but recently even the thought of it makes me feel sick, but, I am fine when I think of doing it to a guy I was seeing on and off not that long ago (I was still with my partner at that time) what can I do because ...
A. 19 October 2007: I guess you're looking for validation or recognition for your efforts. I can understand that. I wonder though why you're not more concerned about the fact you were giving oral sex to another man while still with your partner. Is there a bigger ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is always intruding into who I see and why. What should I do?
Q. I'm been with my boyfriend for almost 3 yrs. and I hate it when he tells me a story and leave out (the important parts) but when his friends are over he tells them the real thing. Also I don't like it when he gets to stop and talk to females he use ...
A. 19 October 2007: You do need to talk to your boyfriend. The longer you let him think he can get away with this behavior, the worse it will get. He will become accustomed to the concept he has the right to check up you, based on the fact you let him do it. Set new ... (read in full...)
I'm sick and tired of rejection in every aspect of my life.
Q. I'm sick and tired of rejection in every aspect of my life. I went last week to a federal government career fair in my country wich is not USA and one recruiter got very interested in hiring me. I was very happy because I've been unemployed for a ...
A. 18 October 2007: Cojelo suave nena, estas triste y debaria hablar con algien......
You sound very sad, angry, bitter etc. That could make people try to avoid you and that's not what you want. Try to grab a hold of things before you break down. I've just fin... (read in full...)
| *ddie's friends
These are mutual friends, so *ddie has
added them and they have added *ddie!
|
