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Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal.
I heard this quote recently: ""The truth is like castor oil. It’s difficult to take and hard to swallow, so we get them to laugh and while their mouths are open, we pour a little in." -Harold Clurman
If you have an urgent question, please post it on the main page. Real life keeps me busy and has enough going on to keep me from being on here 24/7.... I hope yours does too! ;)
Current book recommendation: Untethered Soul, by Michael Singer. A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. The Power of Now, also by Eckhart Tolle. Really powerful stuff in there about not letting your runaway thoughts take over your life. Be present in the Now. You have what you need, right there, right inside yourself. Do yourself a HUGE favor and read these books. They may lead to an important and fundamental shift in your well-being. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." --Eckhart Tolle
All time fave relationship figure out book: A Fine Romance, Judith Sills, PhD. Buy if you are stuck and can't figure out why he won't commit, or why you keep picking guys who can't commit.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck." -The Dalai Lama
"Most people are doing the best they can, given what they know and understand. Including you. If they knew more and were aware of more, they would do things differently." -- Louise Hay
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain
I like these links right now: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4593/A-Simple-Way-to-Let-Go-of-Our-Negative-Patterns.html
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/04/04/25-life-lessons/
So here's the thing. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Weakness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Actually, according to Albert Einstein, that's the definition of insanity but I think that's a bit of a strong word choice.
“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” -The Dalai Lama.
The choices you make may affect others. Think about the consequences, intended or unintended, before you do something that you may have to explain later. Imagine you are standing in front of a group of people and have to defend what you chose to do.... if you can't manage to do it well, that's a fairly plain indicator it's a bad idea.
If everyone who loves you hates your partner, there might be a problem. If you only have your partner, there IS a problem.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8202/12-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship.html
If he’s mean to you now, he’s only going to get worse. Some people are energy vampires; they feed on the pain they inflict on others. They are broken. They will break you. Get out. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can fix him. You can’t.
You have my permission to say “no.”
If you are depressed, think of it like an illness. You have to treat it. Medicine can help. Talk to your doctor. If you’re drinking a lot, you’re already self-medicating. You might as well get some prescription-grade pharmaceuticals to help you get to a point where you can figure out why you’re self-medicating.
There’s a reason it’s called ‘junk food.’
Yoga is good for the body and the mind as well as soothing the spirit. Try it. Brisk walks are great too.
Don't eat crap. Canned sugary beverages or canned diet beverages are NOT good for you, they have no nutritional value and set you up for a lot of bad stuff. Don't drink them. Water is good. Decide if you can tolerate coffee or tea (I love them both) and then drink those in moderation.
Life is nasty, cold, brutal, unfair, and crappy. It’s also amazing, beautiful, uplifting, awe-inspiring and fun. You choose how you’re going to approach it every day.
I have a few soapboxes that I tend to haul out: I don't like to see people put their health or future at risk and I REALLY don't like to see them put other's health or future at risk. I feel strongly that not providing good sex education or keeping sex education from children is a form of child abuse. It's like sending them out into the world not knowing how to buckle a seatbelt.
I love this video from plannedparenthood.org (How Pregnancy Happens): http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
More good information from plannedparenthood.org on the various methods of birth control:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
I don't have any expertise in abusive relationships, but I do think there are some common sense basics that people who are in one might be missing. Find out more here: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal. |
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| Latest articles: Questions to ask before getting married!
No replies yet... 24 March 2016: I just read a great article in the New York Times online. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married” It was written by Eleanor Stanford and posted March 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com...
Need Christmas or other holiday gift ideas? Look here!
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26 January 2011: Each year, we here at DearCupid see many submissions asking, "What should I get my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/lover/partner for Valentine's Day?" I think it would be great to consolidate these questions and some ideas into one place, so I've ...
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1 May 2008: I posted this as an answer to a young man, a virgin, who wanted to know about his young girlfriend, also a virgin... First, I know it's hard to believe but a girl her age may not know her body very well. She may not know what is sexually stimula...
More than one way to get up the Duff!!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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14 March 2008: Some us ‘Aunts’ have been entertaining ourselves with fundamental questions about various ways pregnancy occurs…. I remembered that there were strange stories surrounding the births of some of the gods and goddesses of ancient myth, and I had a ...
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How do I please my family but still have a life?
Q. well i need some advice but where do i start.? i live at home with my mum step dad and brother and sister. sometimes i only just get on with my family, but the majority of the time we're always arguing. my stepdads and alcoholic, he doesnt dri...
A. 27 August 2008: How could he find out if you call Childline? It's a freephone call and will not show up on any bills. You could ring it from any phone and it's a free call. He needn't find out anything.
I'm sorry to hear that things are not going well for you. You ... (read in full...)
Do you guys know when there is sperm about to come out or not?
Q. Ok heres my problem me and my boyfriend have been in a 7 month relationship and i think he the one..so i gave it up to him, but here the thing he did the poke-meaning he went in and then out in and then out we didnt have a condom so iam worryed.But ...
A. 21 August 2008: I am happy for you. I hope that you've become wiser now about protecting yourself and understanding the importance of sex education. You can always stop having sex too, until you're older, you don't need to do it to stay cool or keep the guy. Okay? ... (read in full...)
I want to stay for the kids but she has other things on her mind....
Q. Hi everyone! I don’t have a lot of close friends, and that is why I’m hoping to get an advice that might help me sort through this! I have been married for over 10 years, and have two beautiful kids. My wife and I have been in a great relationsh...
A. 18 August 2008: Hi, thanks for the follow up, I'm glad you took the words I wrote in the spirit with which they were intended.
Let us know what you decide to do and how things go for you. We aunts sometimes get a little bit attached to hearing the outcomes, and ... (read in full...)
What does a orgasm feel like?
Q. Hi this is a question for girls only cuz i don't think guys can answer this question. Anyways i'm 13 and i have a boyfriend who's 15. And yesterday he was finger banging me but it wasn't the first time. But yesterday was different he got me ...
A. 18 August 2008: Um, guys, read the original date on this post. June 2007. Over a year ago. So calm down everyone and try to stay rational, okay?
... (read in full...)
How do I get my life back when these men stole it from me?
Q. Im struggling. Im 18 and a sxual assult victum. Was raped at 6 and touched up by mumz ex at 13 i have been a mess since. I just want my life back. These men stole it from me and they dont get jail time or nufin how is that justice? How can i look a ...
A. 17 August 2008: Hi, one of the aunts compiled a whole list of crisis numbers in Australia, and I've put together this list for you, as I don't know where in Australia you are. I hope that one of them will work for you and you'll be referred to a center that can ... (read in full...)
Am I a stalker?
Q. I had a 5 yr relationship with an unavailable guy which recently ended. I called him several times in 1 week,went by his work to talk to him and went over to his house but i did not threaten him. am I a stalker? After these 3 incidences in the last ...
A. 16 August 2008: By unavailable, do you mean he's married or in long-term relationship?
As far as being labeled a stalker, have you stopped trying to make contact with him now? I'm guessing that the reason you wrote in is because either he or his wife is accu... (read in full...)
Our relationship has changed, she flirts with other guys, and does not talk to me as much as we used to, should I be worried that she doe not care anymore or what?
Q. my girlfriend and i have been together for 4 months, we had been though alot and even an unplanned pregnancy (she got an abortion which was a mutural decision and i went through the process with her but i favored having the abortion more and put it ...
A. 16 August 2008: Hi, from what you've written, I don't hold out much hope for this relationship lasting for you. It sounds like she's mentally moving on, especially if she has tried to break up with you several times, and has said that the break up is inevitable.
I... (read in full...)
Should I give him the space to work things out in his head or should I do something else?
Q. I have this male friend who I have recently been getting closer and closer to. We spend nights in together just having wine and chatting, we go out places together and we’ve both admitted we really like each other. I don’t know what it is, but ...
A. 16 August 2008: Hi, I just wanted to add a note. The reason you got only one answer is that Irish has covered it all and has given you some awesome advice. Anything else would be redundant; you got the top agony aunt here!... (read in full...)
I am so angry at my husband about the way he is with MONEY!
Q. What do I do when my husband has money in his pocket from his paycheck but uses the money from my paycheck to by things or to eat out from our joint account. This Iritates me to no end. I have already told him that it bothers me but still he does it ...
A. 16 August 2008: Hi Chloe, I understand why you're angry with him. I guess it's time to have THE MONEY TALK with him. Why aren't both of your paychecks going into the joint account? Or at least an agreed-on portion of each one? You can generally get direct deposit ... (read in full...)
How do I please my family but still have a life?
Q. well i need some advice but where do i start.? i live at home with my mum step dad and brother and sister. sometimes i only just get on with my family, but the majority of the time we're always arguing. my stepdads and alcoholic, he doesnt dri...
A. 16 August 2008: Wow, you are really in a very difficult situation. I'm very concerned about the physical abuse from your step-father. I expect your mother doesn't know about it, or is unable to help you? I think this is too difficult for an amateur agony aunt to ... (read in full...)
Is sex with a comdon safe if I'm not on the pill as well?
Q. My boyfriend and i slept together last night, we used a condom but i am not on the pill, can i feel ok about not being pregnant?...
A. 16 August 2008: Sorry, I just need to correct Jen's numbers, which are inaccurate.
According to the plannedparenthood.org website,
"Birth control pills are very effective. Combination pills work best when taken every day. Progestin-only pills must be taken at... (read in full...)
My penis skin is stuck to my penis head... what is wrong?
Q. hi I am 12 years old and their was little white things on the head of my penis. Since i masturbate, it came off after a while. But then i noticed that my penis skin is stuck to the head of my penis. when i pull on it, it bends and hurts alot. I kn...
A. 16 August 2008: Hi, I expect Uncle Phil is correct. You apparently should be retracting your foreskin, gently cleaning and then drying the glans, the pulling the foreskin back into position. If you cannot retract your foreskin, then you definitely need to see your ... (read in full...)
Do my parents have a right to dictate what are healthy/unhealthy boundaries between myself and someone I'm dating?
Q. About 10 weeks ago I met a woman through a mutual friend. We've officially been dating for about 8 weeks now. Averaging around 1.7 dates per week. We talk on the phone quite regularly. I'm 25 years old, responsible, and feel fortunate t...
A. 16 August 2008: I'm not sure what your family obligations are, but I guess they are important enough to keep you living at home.
Based on your rather clinical assessment of the health of your relationship (you sounded like a doctor reviewing a case, lol), seem... (read in full...)
Do you guys know when there is sperm about to come out or not?
Q. Ok heres my problem me and my boyfriend have been in a 7 month relationship and i think he the one..so i gave it up to him, but here the thing he did the poke-meaning he went in and then out in and then out we didnt have a condom so iam worryed.But ...
A. 16 August 2008: To answer your most recent question, no, your body will not change nor should it feel different. However, being stressed and worrying a lot may create the idea that it has.
If you're really worried about being pregnant, go buy a test and read and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and I just had a massive fight. He thinks I'm accusing him of being a theif. How can I fix this?
Q. please help! my boyfriend and I just had a big fight. All because he thought I was accusing him of taking something of mine which I wasnt. Ok so basically 2 weeks ago I came home and I took my class ring off that my mom gave me and I put it on the ...
A. 16 August 2008: I think you owe your boyfriend a huge apology. You may have to grovel a bit to get across how sorry you are. You need to acknowledge that you thought the worst of him. You did suspect him of doing what you asked, and now you can't take those words ... (read in full...)
My GF hits me constantly, she told me I'm the only one that makes her mad and her ex's were better!...
Q. Ok.. Me and my girlfriend have been going out for 3 months,i love her to death she knows it,BUT She thinks all i want is sex and she tells all her friends... she always hits me approximately she has hit me 7-9 times in the face (closed fist) a...
A. 16 August 2008: You do need to end this relationship, as it is very bad for your own mental health. What country do you live in? We might be able to point you at some good local resources that will help you cope with this.
It might be a good idea to have a chat... (read in full...)
My fiancee is making me sick with anxiety!
Q. I feel like i want to die, i can't sleep, i can't eat. I regret my abortion now because i only did because i loved my boyfriend and he wasn't ready to be a dad, but it wanted it so much. Now he says he wants time apart, or to stop living together, ...
A. 16 August 2008: Wow, you've had great advice from Diovan, Smiles and Emivia. I'm sorry about what you've been through with the abortion and how you've been treated by him.
I have to say that I think you're feeling sick because your body and your mind know what your... (read in full...)
Will he come back to me so we can spend the rest of our lives as a team?
Q. ok- so it's kind of a long story- but here it goes... I met my bf almost three years ago when I was visiting another state- looking at moving there. We were both dating other people (neither one exlusive)- but met through a mutual friend and hit ...
A. 15 August 2008: I have to agree with Smiles excellent advice. I hate to tell you this, but I don't think that devoting anymore time and energy and affection to this man will ever get him to say 'I love you.' If he doesn't love you after 3 years, he's never going ... (read in full...)
I want to stay for the kids but she has other things on her mind....
Q. Hi everyone! I don’t have a lot of close friends, and that is why I’m hoping to get an advice that might help me sort through this! I have been married for over 10 years, and have two beautiful kids. My wife and I have been in a great relationsh...
A. 15 August 2008: Your wife has't become an online agony aunt, has she? That might account for the computer use. The rest of it is either as you suspect, an affair, or possibly she's going through her mid-life crisis? I know I've started working out more and am ... (read in full...)
Why won't he tell anyone about me even though we are having sex?
Q. hey, well this is slightly embarressing i'm 16 years old, and am sleeping with a guy who's 21. he treats me so well and well yeah, you get the jist. we started getting together when i was 15, and he didnt want me to tell anyone because of the a...
A. 15 August 2008: I'd probably listen to my friends, and cut off the sex for a bit, to see how he reacts. If he drops you right away, yes, he was just into you for the sex. If he starts treating you as a proper boyfriend would, then you'll know. If he spends hours ... (read in full...)
I love him and I want to trust him, but he's making it extremely difficult?!...
Q. I trust my husband and I don't doubt him normally, but over the past few weeks he's been making it really hard. He's a truck driver and drives a lot at night so he sees hookers and they approach him. That doesn't bother me, but when I ask him what ...
A. 15 August 2008: I think he may be tired of the same old question. I mean, really, as he is a truck driver, what else would he be doing except driving? Maybe he's chosen an idiotic way of dealing with it.
As for the porn, I personally wouldn't put one and one toge... (read in full...)
Why the black out? (Truncated)
Q. Hello I'm another bloke who not so good at understanding women. Met up with group of fiends about 3 weeks ago who had not seen in over 4 years,as I had moved away. One of them I had softspot for before but she was only 18 - could not say or d...
A. 15 August 2008: Your big clue was the 'best ignore the last text'; she just didn't want to talk about it. At all. And by texting and leaving messages to try to explain, you weren't ignoring it. So maybe it's a bit cold of her not to want to discuss it, but women ... (read in full...)
She dries up completely in a matter of seconds. What's wrong?
Q. hey , well, me and my girlfriend have been dating for about 6 months, and having sex reguarly for about 4. but over the last week or two , she gets moist just before sex, but literally just as i am about to go in, she dries up complelty, in a matter ...
A. 15 August 2008: Lucky girl. Have fun!... (read in full...)
Very nervous about meeting my girlfriend's mum! Any advice?
Q. why am i so nervous to meet my gf's mother!! need answers asap its tonight!!!!...
A. 15 August 2008: Shave shortly before you meet her. Trim and clean your fingernails. Wear clean, non-wrinkled clothes. If it's appropriate, try not to wear old or torn jeans. Polish your shoes and wear a good pair. If it's casual and you'll be wearing flipflops and ... (read in full...)
Can lupus be passed on during pregnancy?
Q. I m still not sure if I have lupus because I haven t been tested yet, but I m in the process of renewing my insurance. When I was 7 months pregnant I started to get this funny skin rash or something, it didn t itch but it would come and ...
A. 15 August 2008: It's not clear to me if you are still pregnant from the question. It seems to me that you need to get whatever you have diagnosed and treated sooner rather than later.
Are you delaying this because you don't want to have a pre-existing cond... (read in full...)
She dries up completely in a matter of seconds. What's wrong?
Q. hey , well, me and my girlfriend have been dating for about 6 months, and having sex reguarly for about 4. but over the last week or two , she gets moist just before sex, but literally just as i am about to go in, she dries up complelty, in a matter ...
A. 15 August 2008: This must be very frustrating for you both. Now she's probably worried about it, and that little narrative soundtrack that runs in women's heads is probably working on a loop like this. 'Oh I hope I don't dry up again. I don't want to disappoint him ... (read in full...)
Do you guys know when there is sperm about to come out or not?
Q. Ok heres my problem me and my boyfriend have been in a 7 month relationship and i think he the one..so i gave it up to him, but here the thing he did the poke-meaning he went in and then out in and then out we didnt have a condom so iam worryed.But ...
A. 15 August 2008: Whoops! Here's the link to the video.
http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
I learned a lot watching this and before I did I thought I was well-educated in contraception and sexual h... (read in full...)
Do you guys know when there is sperm about to come out or not?
Q. Ok heres my problem me and my boyfriend have been in a 7 month relationship and i think he the one..so i gave it up to him, but here the thing he did the poke-meaning he went in and then out in and then out we didnt have a condom so iam worryed.But ...
A. 15 August 2008: He's either lying or he's ignorant of the facts of life. Either way, you're the one who's going to get pregnant if you keep having unprotected sex. He doesn't have to go through 9 months of pregnancy for 6 minutes of unprotected fun. The trade off ... (read in full...)
She wants us to have a baby and settle down but I'm not sure-help!
Q. i dont know what to do with my girlfriend, i do love her, but i enjoy spending time alone, i do have attractions for other woman, but i dont go looking for them. my girlfriend wants to have a family with me, but i dont want to, she knows i d...
A. 15 August 2008: You know that you need to do what is right for her. I think you have to make it very clear that you do not want children and do not want to move in with her. She has to understand that you do love her but are not the right match for her, as you two ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of two years had a bad attitude, and though I moved with him to Boston, I could no longer take the way he behaved, we broke up, now he and I talk on the phone, and he appears to want to continue this odd relationship, should I participa
Q. Thank you for reading this. I was in a relationship for 2 years that just ended almost 2 weeks ago. When moved to boston (2 hrs away) his stress lvl was high and bickered with me about everything. Visiting him with his bad attitude made me feel lik...
A. 15 August 2008: What kind of closure were you looking for? Are there issues still out there bothering you about the relationship?
I don't much like the sound of him relying on you to make him happy. If he's relied on you to experience happiness in life, then he n... (read in full...)
I'm never in the mood for sex. I feel like I'm insulting my girlfriend.
Q. Hey, I’ll cut straight to the point. I have two problems. I’ll start with the low libido soon. I feel like I’m never in the mood for sex or anything else. It frustrates me as my girlfriend looks amazing and I feel as if I’m insulting her by not ...
A. 15 August 2008: I agree with PaSpa that you are putting too much pressure on yourself, both worrying about the 'low' libido and also getting an erection. Sex should be an expression of love between two people, as well as all the other stuff that comes with it. It ... (read in full...)
If a guy had cum on his fingers and he fingers a girl, could she become pregnant?
Q. hi i just wondernding if you could help me when a boy fingeres a girl and he had cum on his fingers would the girl feel this? im so worried im pregnant even tho i aint due till next week please help x...
A. 15 August 2008: For some accurate information about how pregnancy occurs, watch this video.
http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
As far as sperm dying within 6 seconds of contacting the air, um, well... (read in full...)
I am trying to find out if this guy only wants sex, and that's it, how do I determine this?
Q. This bloke at work arranged to go chum me to a night out, however he blew me out at the last minute with no explination, we didn't speak for a few months, he sent me a text saying we wanted different things and recently he has started to show an ...
A. 14 August 2008: Why not suggest a normal, run-of-the-mill date and see what he says? Go have a meal together, or go listen to some music or see a play. If he balks at this, then likely he's only interested in a one-off.
What did he mean that you two wanted diff... (read in full...)
I have irregular periods, and my period came very early, after I had sex three days after my last period, could I be pregnant?
Q. I had unprotected sex 3 days after my period and its only been two weeks since I've had sex and I already have my period. I shouldn't get it for atleast a week. is this normal and do I still have a posibility that I could be pregnant? I'm only 15 ...
A. 14 August 2008: It's probably time to buy a pregnancy test and check for certain. Follow the instructions on the box for accurate results.
I have an educational video for you to watch that will help explain a lot of things. I learned a lot watching it.
http:... (read in full...)
I have multiple bumps around and on my penis, I thougth they were razor bumps, as I shave that area, but topical creams will not take them away, could it be herpes, how do I get rid of them, if it is not herpes?
Q. Dear Cupid, For the past year, or so, I have had small bumbs around my pubic area and base of my penis. I shave though, and I shave the base of my penis. I thought these were razor bumps, because of my shaving. However, some of them have been t...
A. 14 August 2008: The best thing for you to do is to see your doctor for a diagnosis. It may be genital warts (one of many human papilloma viruses) or a benign skin condition. Either way, wouldn't you want to have the clean bill of health on the STDs like your ... (read in full...)
The guy I'm seeing tells me that hes not happy with his wife and the marriage is only on paper to him and she is just a roommate?
Q. I have been seeing this guy for about 2 months now. He is married and i knew that the day i met him. Ive known him longer than ive been seeing him. I am in love with him and i know for sure he is my future. He was the one to say I love you first and ...
A. 14 August 2008: The other aunts have given you very good words of advice; they may not be what you want to hear, but do pay attention to the collective wisdom of people with years of life experience.
I'd tell him that you can't be with him until he is no long... (read in full...)
My BF who is Buddhist will be living in a hermitage in the middle of nowhere - should I join him??
Q. I just wondered if anybody had any words of 'wisdom' for me. My boyfriend of a year has just gone into retreat - he is a Buddhist. He will be living at a hermitage in the middle of nowhere for an indefinite period - a year minimum. We are still '...
A. 14 August 2008: It seems to me that you aren't as interested in this year of retreat as a learning experience for you, but more as a way to stay close to your boyfriend. I understand that you must feel very hurt and abandoned by him; like you said, his 'path' seems ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is in a mess after he took someone's car.
Q. what must i do my boyfriend is in a big mess,he took someone's car just to please a fling woman to take her home,i found out about this after it happened and he told me the whole truth and i did forgave him but after punishing him. my problem is ...
A. 14 August 2008: You're not being selfish by letting him pay for the consequences of his own actions. He did the deed, he can pay for it himself. There's absolutely no reason for you to pay your own hard-earned money to bail him out of this situation. Perhaps this ... (read in full...)
I'm scared of leaving this controlling guy because of his threats
Q. I have been in this realtionship for 10 years. We have had alot of problems. When I first met him we dated for like 2 years and seem to be the sweetwst guy on earth. When we got married it all seem to change slowly a little at a time. When he was ...
A. 14 August 2008: Hi, you sound like you're in a horrible situation. I'm sorry, I don't know the answer to your question about if you can get him for rape. The best people to ask would be the police.
But I know how scary that can be, so I have a hotline/website for ... (read in full...)
I'm taking a blood test soon, but I'm terribly afraid of needles. Help me!
Q. Ok, I know this isn't a romantic question, but I really need some help about this. First, I'm terribly afraid of needles. I can stand the sight of one but once I see one I start thinking on how it will go into my arm and then many horror images wo...
A. 14 August 2008: Hi, I'm a fainter when blood is drawn too. I tend to go woozy and have to recover for a bit before I can get up and move.
First off, make sure you tell the person who is drawing your blood that you are very very nervous and may feel faint. They will... (read in full...)
How do I get my boyfriend to pick up after himself? It is seriously driving me crazy.
Q. My boyfriend and I have a 1yr old that I clean up after all day. Well my boyfriend has gotten a lot better with helping me with our son but other then that, the only other thing I don t have to ask him to do is cook because thats onething he loves. ...
A. 14 August 2008: Hi, the last thing you want is another person to pick up after, right? You must be exhausted!
Well, the laundry one is easy. If it's not in the hamper, it doesn't get washed. You're going to have to develop a case of house-blindness for a bit unti... (read in full...)
My husband continues to abuse me, emotionally and physically!
Q. Dear Cupid I am in a situation that I seem to not be able to get out. My husband continues to abuse me emotionally and physically. I have no trade or money to get out of this situation. No matter what, he continues to cheat, and when he gets cau...
A. 14 August 2008: There are organizations that can help you get out of this abusive relationship and provide support for you to move ahead with your life. I suggest contacting this crisis number/website for a referral to a local women's shelter and advice as to how ... (read in full...)
I really don't want her to date others as well as me, and I don't know what to do next.
Q. Me and my girlfriend have been together for 3 years. I'm the first serious boy friend she has had. She now says she wants to see other people (just on dates) but still go out with me. She said something she needs to get out her system to make sur...
A. 14 August 2008: Ooooh, this is a tough situation to be in. You don't want to lose her, but she's not fully committed to the relationship if she wants to date other people. You didn't tell us how you and she are. If she's very young, she may have a point, hard as it ... (read in full...)
I'm Confused and Unhappy
Q. I met John online 5yrs ago, we kept up a long distance relationship and travelled together every year and had wonderful times together. Three years ago our daughter was born and we were just overjoyed. I have now relocated to his country at his ...
A. 7 August 2008: You've had a major upheaval in both your lives. You've moved to be with him after a long distance relationship and he's suddenly found himself with a ready-made family. A family of his own making, of course, but there it is. He might be missing his ... (read in full...)
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