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*enimandLace44

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*enimandLace44's profile:

Single and made a lot of mistakes and bad choices. I believe in second chances. I believe that today is a fresh start. I believe that people change. I believe everyone deserves to be loved for who they are not what someone else wants them to be. I believe that sometimes things can be fixed and sometimes they cant. Either way we have the strength within us to do what we have to do.

I'm a mother of 7...and I'm a full time EMT. That means I give emergency medical care and drive an ambulance. I am an adrenalin junkie and I love helping people. :)

Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got.--Janis Joplin

Don't listen to those who say, "It's not done that way." Maybe it's not, but maybe you will. Don't listen to those who say, "You're taking too big a chance." Michelangelo would have painted the Sistine floor, and it would surely be rubbed out by today. Most importantly, don't listen when the little voice of fear inside of you rears its ugly head and says, "They're all smarter than you out there. They're more talented, they're taller, blonder, prettier, luckier and have connections…" I firmly believe that if you follow a path that interests you, not to the exclusion of love, sensitivity, and cooperation with others, but with the strength of conviction that you can move others by your own efforts, and do not make success or failure the criteria by which you live, the chances are you'll be a person worthy of your own respect.--Neil Simon

1234567Next > [7 pages, 253 answers]

Suggestions for a short driving vacation from New Mexico?

Q.   Our one year anniversary is fast approaching and we don't have a lot of money but want to go somewhere for a romantic 4 days. We live in southern New Mexico so we're not close to California or Florida. Any cool romantic places we go drive to ...

A.   18 September 2011: San Antonio is good. The riverwalk and the Alamo...and seaworld. OKC has bricktown... ... (read in full...)

Can Nair damage your private area?

Q.   dear cupid, what are the risks associated with using nair on your bikini area (and i don't mean just the line...i mean everywhere)??? i've heard that it's pretty painful, but is there anything beyond that??? like, could it actually damage ...

A.   16 September 2011: the voice of experience here...DONT DO IT. :) I needed vodka, ibuprophen, etc afterwards. The chemicals blistered my skin and it was majorly uncomfortable for days afterward. Never again! Plus it didn't do a good job! It's waxing for me these days! ... (read in full...)

My husband is very particular about how he likes oral, is this normal?

Q.   Hello, I have written in before and gotten excellent advice. My last posting was about a week ago about my mom objecting to the way my husband and I treat each other. We have three kids (biological), 8, 5, and 2, and have the adoption of an 1...

A.   14 September 2011: conforming with or constituting an accepted standard, model, or pattern; esp., corresponding to the median or average of a large group in type, appearance, achievement, function, development, etc.; natural; usual; standard; regular Normal is a pre... (read in full...)

Can you be married and fall in love with another person?

Q.   Is it possible to fall in love with someone else when you are married?...

A.   13 September 2011: Yes it's possibly. But it almost always ends with your heart being broken. And a mess that can never be fixed. Don't act on it...... (read in full...)

I bought a new motorcycle and my best friend was really hurtful about it!

Q.   My best friend's comment has me baffled. I emailed my best friend and told her I bought a new motorcycle. Her response to me was: "OMG!!! I am shocked that you bought a bike. DO YOU WANT TO BE KILLED???? ARE YOU NUTS????? YES!!!!! HELMETS...

A.   17 July 2011: I hear this all the time when people find out I have a bike. I'm also an EMT and over the 4th of July weekend I worked 4 motorcycle wrecks. It didn't make me not want to ride, but it does make me want to be very careful. Take it in the spirit it was ... (read in full...)

Is he lying? Am I over reacting? Or how could this problem happen with the phone?

Q.   Hey Everyone, I have a serious problem ....Ok myself and my fiance are in love and we live together hes a great man I never once had him cheat on me or anything. but today I found something that really upset me and he says he didn't do it, what ...

A.   25 June 2011: I would give him the benefit of doubt. He sounds like a keeper. Odd things happen sometimes to innocent people! If this is the only time then drop it and move on. ... (read in full...)

Paranoid about a "psychic's" prediction....

Q.   To make a long story short, A psychic told me some things. It was just for fun I wasn't trying to find out real life answers... Then she tells me that my bf already has or will meet some girl. She described a petite blonde and said she is personab...

A.   11 June 2011: Years ago my mother in law and her best friend went to a psychic for kicks. The woman told my MIL that she was soon to meet the "love of her life." he was tall, dark and handsome...and she would meet him at work. Well, my MIL worked at a truck stop, ... (read in full...)

Something from my past has come back to bite me in the butt!

Q.   i am dating this guy since 2 years.. i had a very ugly past which i didnt share completely with my husband.. 6 months bak we gt married against his family's wish.. i mean since the start they were against me .. he is younger than me.. now the ...

A.   5 June 2011: What are the "purity" rules in your culture? Is a kiss crossing some kind of line? Was it the staying over? Can you explain exactly why he feels so devastated? ... (read in full...)

Why don't my parents want me to grow up?

Q.   I'm 23 and still living at home. I envy my cousins who are in their twenties and have children with their partners out of wedlock. My parents are really conservative and I'm not. They think that you have to be married just to leave home! I ...

A.   5 June 2011: I understand because I was brought up the same way. And I've seen this played out over and over and over. Someone has to break the mold. I don't say you are backwards...just that marriage is not the best way out IF you aren't sure about it. If you ... (read in full...)

Did my daughter have sex while she was visiting a friend? Or am I over-exaggerating things?

Q.   I am a father to a 17 year old girl. A little over a month ago i gave her permission to stay at her friend's house during Easter recess. She DID go, because i called one day and spoke to her mom who then passed the phone. Fine. I was proud of her. ...

A.   2 June 2011: Well I'm certainly not a teenaged girl. And I'm not at all sure why you are so angry. However I think you received some good advice here. What you choose to do with it is up to you. Frankly, after your last post... I'm hearing alarm bells... ... (read in full...)

Did my daughter have sex while she was visiting a friend? Or am I over-exaggerating things?

Q.   I am a father to a 17 year old girl. A little over a month ago i gave her permission to stay at her friend's house during Easter recess. She DID go, because i called one day and spoke to her mom who then passed the phone. Fine. I was proud of her. ...

A.   2 June 2011: It's normal for 17 year old girls to fantasize about musicians. It's normal to share and laugh about weird dreams. I don't think she had sex. As the mother of 7, I understand your concern, but I think you need to relax just a little bit. Keep comm... (read in full...)

What are women's views on foreplay?

Q.   OK well. It is really a fun thing befor the real thing. And I know guys get pleasure out of foreplay. They like that kind of secret between him and his girlfriend no one else. It keeps him alot interested. What bothers me is how do women feel ...

A.   6 May 2011: I believe I once slept with Mr Churchhill...only once.... (read in full...)

My wife was not a virgin

Q.   Hello, my wife and i have being married for 4 years, i just found out she had a hymen reconstruction, i though we where both virgins now am stuck between a rock and a hard place.. I feel like cheating on her for what she did to me.what do you think ...

A.   23 April 2011: Ok, I'm sorry that we made you feel like the bad guy here. That wasn't the intent. She was wrong, and she should have given you this information BEFORE the wedding. I am not condoning her behavior. I do think she did what she did to try to be what ... (read in full...)

Trapped in a loveless marriage..........

Q.   Hi-i need advice, please help!I have been with the same girl for 10 years, married for 2. It was a mistake, we are friends nothing more. 18 months ago I tried to leave, she was devistated. We had 'goodbye' sex and she fell pregnant. I agreed to ...

A.   23 April 2011: "..I told her I would leave my wife for her." James, you told her one thing and did another. Now she is doing the same thing....sometimes circumstances change our decisions...and you of all people should realize this. I'm very sorry for your pain ... (read in full...)

My wife was not a virgin

Q.   Hello, my wife and i have being married for 4 years, i just found out she had a hymen reconstruction, i though we where both virgins now am stuck between a rock and a hard place.. I feel like cheating on her for what she did to me.what do you think ...

A.   22 April 2011: Excellent answers YouWish. This woman wanted to be what you wanted so bad she went thru a painful surgery...and the pain of a a broken hymen just for you...and you want to cheat on her now? Come on Poster, this woman regrets her past and love... (read in full...)

Trapped in a loveless marriage..........

Q.   Hi-i need advice, please help!I have been with the same girl for 10 years, married for 2. It was a mistake, we are friends nothing more. 18 months ago I tried to leave, she was devistated. We had 'goodbye' sex and she fell pregnant. I agreed to ...

A.   18 April 2011: A lot of good advice on this thread. Abella hit the nail on the head. This marriage is over whether you leave now or not, You will eventually. Do things the right way, so there will be less regrets later. Some areas have laws aginst the cust... (read in full...)

Advice on buying sex toys.

Q.   I am seeing someone and I want to buy some toys for me to use when we video call between our visits to each other. Thing is I have never bought and used sex toys before, and I really don't know where to start or what to think about getting, can ...

A.   15 April 2011: AnneSummers.com is a good place. They also have stores in the UK. They ship and the packaging is discreet. I'm sure there are a lot of other places online as well. :)... (read in full...)

Have you noticed any behavior problems with your child after he/she has begun dating?

Q.   hi i am back again. I have a new question about whether or not others have noticed any behavior problems with their kids when they began dating someone steady?...

A.   15 April 2011: :) my bad! Yes children have a hard time when parents begin to seem serious about someone. Their whole world as they know it feels threatened. Make sure you spend one on one time with them and try to keep communication open. They have had you to ... (read in full...)

Reason guys visit toilet so often?

Q.   Hi all. I have a question. Is there any particular reason why guys would go to the toilet a lot whilst on a date, apart from the obvious reason of course....

A.   15 April 2011: Some people need to urinate more when they are nervous. And like someone said maybe checking the mirror. If his other actions were odd then maybe drugs or something but not just because he visited the men's room. ... (read in full...)

Does depression make people fall out of love?

Q.   does depression make people fall out of love? my bf(ex) used to love me he couldnt explain it but he just did. Then he got lost in life and got depressed, next thing I know he wants to be friends. He wants to be alone and have no girls in his ...

A.   15 April 2011: Very well said. Depression makes it too hard to maintain relationships. You just don't have the energy to cope with it. You don't want to be around people. I don't think it's personal. I hope he is getting help of some kind.... (read in full...)

Have you noticed any behavior problems with your child after he/she has begun dating?

Q.   hi i am back again. I have a new question about whether or not others have noticed any behavior problems with their kids when they began dating someone steady?...

A.   15 April 2011: Oh yes! It happens with every one of them. I have 7 kiddos and the 5th is now "dating" and "in love." my advice is too stay very involved and don't be one of those parents who believes everything they say. The best of kids will make life changing ... (read in full...)

All I want to do after work is sleep or watch TV! How can I change this?

Q.   Hi, I am tired all the time. I get home and all I feel like is eat, watch TV and sleep. My new job is extremely demanding and tiresome. I don't want to leave the house or do anything. I don't enjoy going out much as I used to. My BF has al...

A.   15 April 2011: See a doctor. At your age you are probably experiencing mild depression. The brain needs a chemical called seratonin to produce "joy." there are meds that can help that are not long term. Good luck.... (read in full...)

Hubby and I fantasizing about affection with other people. Good idea or no?

Q.   My husband and I have been together for 10 years and married for a total of 5 years.We are both very open minded people and honest with each other.Marriage is great and since we almost grew up together we are totally bonded and secure in our ...

A.   15 April 2011: It works for some people but as a rule it doesn't. Fantasy tends to become reality, and one or the other will become jealous and it ruins a relationship. ... (read in full...)

How do you get over a FWB relationship?

Q.   How to get over FWB? I have fallen for him, but I really don't want to. Not just because it's torturing me, but because there's no way I'd ever want a serious commitment with him. How do I go back to being friends and be ok with it when I...

A.   15 April 2011: Time helps more than anything. Seeing them in casual group settings and working thru the feelings helps too. Basically you have to just fake it until you get there. The more casual "friend" interactions you have the easier it gets.... (read in full...)

Women: Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Q.   Warning:(The following contains broad generalizations to illustrate a point, there are no rules nor concrete all encompassing truths in what I write, there are always exceptions. This applies to men too) I've been on this site for a while now and ...

A.   15 April 2011: Great article and responses. ... (read in full...)

He got an erection from just cuddling?

Q.   me and my boyfriend were snuggling on the sofa together, and he got an erection.. Whats with that?, We were just watching a film, not even kissing.. I don't understand why it happened.. ...

A.   9 March 2011: We know because we dated boys...married boys...and gave birth to boys. Having raised/raising four sons Ive learned more than I ever wanted to know about the male anatomy. :)... (read in full...)

He got an erection from just cuddling?

Q.   me and my boyfriend were snuggling on the sofa together, and he got an erection.. Whats with that?, We were just watching a film, not even kissing.. I don't understand why it happened.. ...

A.   9 March 2011: Boys that age can get an erection at any time for a huge variety of reasons. He really cant control what that part of his body does and how it reacts. In time he will be able to control it more. UncleBob...LOL ... (read in full...)

Do girls masturbate without thinking of boys?

Q.   i have a girlfriend. i am in a relationship for the past 1 year. we started speaking of sex and all for quite some time now. initially she would tell me that she loved someone else and had slept on the arm of her classmate in d school while in ...

A.   9 March 2011: Yes it is. Tisha is right on this one. (as usual):)... (read in full...)

Met with an ex from 15 years ago and he was totally rude?

Q.   my ex left me for another woman 15 years ago. years later i was thinking of him and looked for him on fb and found him, we started chatting and we were talking about our passed and much we liked it and what could have been and what not. At one point ...

A.   21 February 2011: Fool me once, shame on you...fool me twice, shame on me...honey, he is playing games with you and your emotions. Dont lose what is for what might have been. Its a fantasy that you have. We all have what ifs, and we all wonder about how things could ... (read in full...)

I'm 13 and I think I might be gay. Help!

Q.   Im 13 and i have a girlfriend but i feel attracted to boys as well. Iv watched normal porn but i watch gay porn as well because i feel like i get more horney over gay porn. I love my girlfriend a lot. But does this make me gay?...

A.   21 February 2011: No, it doesnt make you gay. A lot of straight males watch gay porn. I do not know whether you are gay or not, I'm just saying watching gay porn doesnt indicate that you are. If you are attracted to females...then you are at either straight or bi, in ... (read in full...)

I have no feelings for him but he seems to think we're going out!

Q.   He really likes me, but I'm just not that into him.... what do I do?!? In brief, lovely guy, goes to my college and we share some classes, he's funny, charming, really sweet guy, and he recently told me he really really likes me and asked me out...

A.   21 February 2011: You've been on a date, and have another one planned...so I agree with him, you ARE sort of going out. Thats not to say you are committed to a exclusive relationship. You need to be up front with him about that. ... (read in full...)

Can I still have children?

Q.   hi is it possible to have children if you have been treated for candidas?...

A.   21 February 2011: Candida, commonly known as a yeast infection, does not affect your fertility. Most women have it at some point in their childbearing years. You should see a doctor tho, for a cure. ... (read in full...)

Question on etiquette and American culture

Q.   Hello all, This is a question regarding etiquette and American culture. I am a student studying in the US but I am not an American (I am from South Korea). My student life in US has been, for most part, a very alienating experience with absol...

A.   19 January 2011: The gift card is way too much. If the meal is to be casual, and I'm guessing it will be, a couple of 2 Ltrs of soft drink would be fine. Just ask him if you can bring something... If he says no then don't. For casual friendships it's not expected. ... (read in full...)

I want to celebrate our 9 month anniversary, but I have a family obligation that same day!

Q.   Hey! Me and my boyfriend are goin out 9 months next week and i want it to be really special, we've organized a few things aswell. Its just my mam wants me to go to my cousins confirmation on the same day!:( . How can i tell her that i cant go?...

A.   19 January 2011: I'm with the others... You can't skip family functions for these monthly things. Heck, I would go if it were my anniversary and I've been married 28 years... Special events with family are huge and anniversaries only involve two people which is much ... (read in full...)

Affair: I wish I could back in time and just walk out the minute I seen him

Q.   I recently ended an affair that I've been in for seven months. If I could go back in time I would NEVER have done it. I was bored with my husband who I have been married to for 20 years. I actually thought that I could flirt around and that ...

A.   19 January 2011: Forgiving yourself may be one of, it not THE hardest thing. There is no easy way, just time and hard work. Face each new day and work thru it. There will finally come anday when it doesn't consue your every thought.. When everything you do isn't a ... (read in full...)

I have fantasies of my wife's best friends

Q.   I have fantasies of wife with best friends, I tell her and she says you wish. But I do is that bad?...

A.   14 January 2011: You have fantasies of your wife having sex with her friends or you having sex with her friends?... (read in full...)

I don't know how this works...do couples tend to buy more expensive gifts for their partner through the years and discuss the price range??

Q.   I just received the Christmas gift box my bf who I'm in an open relationship with sent from the US, I'm in the UK and he moved from the UK to Asia for a job. I'm from a culture in which we don't celebrate Christmas so this is the first Christmas ...

A.   31 December 2010: No, it's not about price at all but about what he/you both share an interest in or something that you know he wants or has some special meaning....something that he would enjoy. If the cost is important you are with the wrong guy. :)... (read in full...)

Webcam Incident - scared,afraid,paranoid. help?

Q.   Hello people, i was faced with two seperate incidents that happen over a year ago, close to two. Basically, i webcam-ed in msn with strangers from a chatroom. And you guessed it, i "over-exposed" myself during the short webcam session. Worst of all, ...

A.   31 December 2010: It sounds as if you have learned your lesson. There is no way to know if they did or didnt record your activities but I doubt that you would be recognized from a year old recording anyway... So many people have similar features and webcams aren't ... (read in full...)

I made a horrible mistake and lost her. Should I tell her I love her?

Q.   Am I the only one down in the dumps for playing the hard to get game and lost because I took it to far? She's with him now. I regret never telling her I love her. Should I tell her or is it to late? She got engaged to him Christmas Day....

A.   27 December 2010: Don't tell her. She has moved on and is apparently happy. This happened to my brother 19 years ago. A girl he previously dated called him the night before the wedding and told him how much she loved him and that he was making a mistake. That she ... (read in full...)

What can I do to keep a girlfriend happy?

Q.   i have a girlfriend and am scared that she may not want to go ahead in this relationship, so i want to keep her happy what can i do to keep my girlfriend happy? ...

A.   27 December 2010: You cannot be "someone" or something that you are not to keep her. Be yourself. Has she insinuated or said she doesn't like you as you are? ... (read in full...)

Why don't my parents want me to grow up?

Q.   I'm 23 and still living at home. I envy my cousins who are in their twenties and have children with their partners out of wedlock. My parents are really conservative and I'm not. They think that you have to be married just to leave home! I ...

A.   18 November 2010: They treat you like a child because you still act like their baby. You want to be respected and treated mature...but you are willing to let them support you in every way. Independence comes with a price. To be independent you must be exactly that. ... (read in full...)

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