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Her fiancé makes me cringe!

Q.   No idea if this is the right place to vent but here we go… I’m not at all keen on my friends fiancé. They’ve been together for 8 years and have 2 kids together- he is in his late 30’s but half the time behaves like a child himself- he does...

A.   12 July 2024: Yeah, he is cringe and corny for sure. BUT! And this is a BIG BUT.... Your friend loves him. Or she drank his "cool-aid" and has gotten so used to having a goofy partner. If she can NOT meet up without him and the kids, then maybe you nee... (read in full...)

Do I lend him the money for her engagement ring?

Q.   My friend has been with her boyfriend for 5 years. He is a really nice guy - I would not say I know him really well but we have hung out on a fair few occasions and he’s easy to talk too and I know he treats my friend well. He contacted me the...

A.   9 July 2024: I forgot to add... They can afford a vacation... but he can't save up another 300?... (read in full...)

Was she being truthful with her goals or was it just some elaborate line?

Q.   I matched with a woman on a dating app and after a couple pleasant exchanges we met for drinks at a bar. We shared some chicken tenders as well and I had an incredibly nice time with her. She was very lively, passionate about a variety of things ...

A.   8 July 2024: Sounds like she is playing games. She wants to "test" her own attractiveness and YOUR obedience. I would just move on. Date other people, you can find someone who is on the dating site to MEET a long-term partner not play stupid mind-game... (read in full...)

Do I lend him the money for her engagement ring?

Q.   My friend has been with her boyfriend for 5 years. He is a really nice guy - I would not say I know him really well but we have hung out on a fair few occasions and he’s easy to talk too and I know he treats my friend well. He contacted me the...

A.   8 July 2024: No, don't lend him the money. The fact that he got MAD that you wouldn't lend an "almost stranger" money (the amount is irrelevant). You don't know if he actually will pay back the money, that would be AWKWARD too. If he can't afford th... (read in full...)

Did I handle things wrong? Need some encouraging words

Q.   Back in December I attended a Christmas work party. They had hired some hostesses to go around the party and offer different food and drinks. I spoke to one of them and she seemed more receptive to conversation than the others. I spoke to her a few ...

A.   7 July 2024: Good for you! Glad you met someone who wanted to be with you as much as you wanted to be with her. Best of luck to you both!... (read in full...)

I'm devastated but feel I have no choice but to leave

Q.   Hi guys, I could do with some guidance. My partner and I have been together for 5 years, we have a son and a dog. I moved in just before the first lockdown, away from where I work, my life and my friends to be with him. We always agreed we would ...

A.   4 July 2024: It doesn't sound like you two can find a compromise that works for both of you. DO NOT get pregnant again. A baby can't fix your issues. Do you have support closer to home? Can you get help from family and friend? Get your job back? If you ... (read in full...)

Why do they say they are bi

Q.   What is it with women saying they're bi when they're not? I mean, why tell your boyfriend and everyone that if you're not experienced in dating or at least having sex with a woman? Why say that if you get mad your boyfriend wants to check out look ...

A.   4 July 2024: I think a lot of people who says they are bi - are probably bi. They are attracted to BOTH men and women - doesn't mean they want to date a woman (long term) or even have sex with a woman. Or they are very young and not sure WHAT they want. ... (read in full...)

Am I being a fool?

Q.   Hello, So I've been seeing someone from a different country. We've been seeing each other for about 3 years. He does not have a steady income. He sells clothes. Jobs are scarce where he is. He always asks for money and it never seems lik...

A.   4 July 2024: "Am I being a fool?" Yes, you are being scammed. Even if you visit him, he has probably other people he is ALSO asking for money. YOU are not financially responsible for him OR his brother. How do you really see this relationship EVER m... (read in full...)

Why doesn't he take the time and place to have sex with me?

Q.   So I'm trying to see how to go about this I don't know if I'm in the wrong. My fiance likes to please himself with his toy which I don't have a problem with. I notice he uses it once a week. My issue is that when I want to be intimate since that ...

A.   3 July 2024: If you can get engaged to this man and have sex with him, you CAN sit him down and talk to him. He isn't meeting your needs. Only his own. So your needs are NOT a priority to him, or at least that is how it can feel. TALK to him. Get this... (read in full...)

Anxious over a guy I met once. How do I manage these seemingly ridiculous feelings?

Q.   I met a guy at an event that I really hit it off with, from my impression anyway. We're both 29. Over the next few days, I felt quite happy. I've been happily single for a while and the lovely interaction felt like encouragement, as if the universe ...

A.   27 June 2024: OP, This happens. We meet someone and we think WOW, what a connection! and then... nothing. As someone who is also OCD I know how easy it is to hyperfocus on ONE thing) or in your case person) and then almost making yourself sick with s... (read in full...)

Does it sound like I’m sending mixed signals

Q.   I have been thinking and if I am being honest I feel I have given someone mixed feelings. So I think he has a crush on me. I've said things like well I would date you if...I wouldn't date you if and I don't know why I gave him a list of why. I'v...

A.   26 June 2024: " Do you agree, I send mixed signals?" Yes. Poor guy needs to cut you lose. Or ... you need to cut him loose. YOU don't really want to date him; you just want attention from him. Let him be.... (read in full...)

Work has turned awkward since manager reported me for sexual harrassment

Q.   I thought I was friends with another female cowoker ans things seemed fine and like we enjoyed each others company. She even said she was glad we met and worked together and that she considers me as a good friend and that we would continue working ...

A.   26 June 2024: "A part of me wants to talk with her to explain things and possibly still be friends but I also don’t want to lose my job!" Don't try and talk to her about it. That can only go sideways. She reported you to HR for being friendly and nic... (read in full...)

Cousin shouted at me on my wedding day, then lied about it & now isn’t talking to me!

Q.   My cousin who I was really close too, 3 years ago moved away to America and we haven’t seen each other in person since. We talk on the phone and Skype. A few months ago I got married- I gave everyone over a years notice but she was unab...

A.   26 June 2024: She is jealous and mad that she couldn't make it. And I guess she CHOSE to take it out on you. Leave her be. Remove her from YOUR Facebook. YOUR wedding day wasn't about her. She WANTED to make it about her. Not wanting to postpone for ... (read in full...)

Parents repeat 1

Q.   Hi, I’m American and we have an upcoming holiday in July that my MIL will be coming into town. I don't have any issues with my MIL but I do miss my own parents and would love to see them over the holiday weekend. My partner is normally out of ...

A.   18 June 2024: I think this is something you should talk over with your husband. I don't see the issue if you go visit YOUR family while HE gets to spend time with his mom by himself. His mom might be a little disappointed that you didn't choose to stay a... (read in full...)

How did this online person know me in real life?

Q.   This is going to sound bizzare but I honestly don't know how? Okay so I met someone online and spoke and chatted almost everyday. Then I just left it and went on with my real life family and friends ect. So fast forward a few years and I met this p...

A.   16 June 2024: Do any of your family and/or friends have newer pics of you online (even if you don't) it's not hard to find someone's profile and then look through their friends-list and photos. Or he/she could have stalked you. In person. If he/she knew whe... (read in full...)

Is it wrong that I don't want the same relationship with this child who isn't even related to me?

Q.   I have a brother (Rob), a sister-in-law (Tiffany), a niece and a nephew. I am close to my nieces and nephew who are now teenagers (I spend less time with them now since they spend more time with their friends which is a good thing but I still ...

A.   11 June 2024: No, he is your SIL's nephew, not yours. Of course you do not OWE ANYONE to babysit their kid. No, is a complete sentence, OP If you don't WANT to babysit, say no. It's OK. If they (the SIL and her brother don't like it - tough cookies) ... (read in full...)

Two co workers pursing me its become uncomfortable

Q.   I’m 30 and I ended up sleeping with co worker who is 39. She has been extremely eager to please. For some reason she told her friend at work about it. Now her friend is pursuing me, borderline stalking and won’t miss any opportunity to talk to me. ...

A.   11 June 2024: If you can record the next interaction, then tell her you are NOT interested (stop playing nice and stop being coy). If she doesn't respect your "not interested" go to HR. Also, stop sleeping with married people. It causes more drama than it's ... (read in full...)

Partner picked much older guy for our threesome

Q.   Me and my partner of 10 years have been talking about threesome for while. I was under the impression she would pick someone if similar age but she I asked her mentioned a guy from the pub who is 51! She is 27 and in 32. I don’t mind but I’m just ...

A.   11 June 2024: Maybe she thinks that a guy that "old" can't keep it up for long so it will be over faster... ... (read in full...)

Friend will not accept I am unable to visit her this year.

Q.   One of my best friends lives in Italy and I tend to fly out once a year for around 10-14 days to see her and her daughter who is my goddaughter - she is 6 years old. I’ve been going over every year (covid aside) for the past 11 years - ...

A.   11 June 2024: Tell the friend that she needs to stop using her kiddo to guilt trip you. SPELL it out to her. That the one HURTING your goddaughter is HER, her mother - by filling the kiddo with nonsense. Stop listening to the voice mail. This is emotion... (read in full...)

We were friends and now he wants a break from me?

Q.   Does he seem bitter and we will eventually be able to reconnect? We were coworkers and started to be friends. We would text but not hang out outside of work. He seemed reserved because he was one of the leads at the company-but I did at times get...

A.   9 June 2024: Seems like he wanted more from you than you were willing to give. He didn't want to be friends. You (in his eyes) rejected him. That is why he decided with the "no contact" - it's a punishment of sorts. To have you chase after him. And you didn... (read in full...)

Husband refuses to get rid of items that causing storage shortage

Q.   Hi, 2 years ago my husband and I bought a house and my MIL took it upon herself to bring all of his childhood stuff, approx 20 boxes and store them in the garage of our newly bought house. My husband has never understood why this upset me and sti...

A.   5 June 2024: I absolutely agree with this: "Well, it's your husbands stuff, so why should your MIL be storing it for him?" It's ABOUT time she got rid of HIS clutter! Sit him down, tell him to minimize his stuff in the garage to (let's say) 10 boxes. If he... (read in full...)

Friend really wasn't a friend

Q.   Found out my friend was never really my friend and just interested in me romantically. I feel it’s all been a huge lie and wonder if I should end communication with them! I feel betrayed and even foolish ...

A.   4 June 2024: Shit happens OP. Now you know and you can cut said "friend" out of your life. YOU have to remember that you cannot control other people, their actions, feeling or choices. All you can control is HOW you react to it. Yes, it sucks to real... (read in full...)

We work together decided we could not be together but he's flaunting dating someone in front of me

Q.   We had a crush on each other , but then we realized we can't be together , we work in the same place ...we talked about it and it came to an end ..then he started hanging out with a co worker ..I did not mind but the di worker tried to put it in my ...

A.   4 June 2024: If he was willing to date the other coworker but not you... that should tell you that his feelings for you weren't "That" deep. While I think dating coworkers is a "dumb" thing to do (especially when it doesn't work out), this guy obviousl... (read in full...)

New boyfriend won’t tell his old girlfriend about me

Q.   Hi there. I’ve got a question. I have been seeing this guy for a few weeks. He’s been out of an 11 year relationship. I have been dating him only three days after his break up. He hasn’t told his ex girlfriend about me. She has called while w...

A.   2 June 2024: "Would this be concerning to you?" yes and no. I think starting to days a mere 3 days after a breakup is WAY too soon. He still is VERY intertwined in her life. They still have plans with each other in the future. I'd be worried that you ... (read in full...)

Why does my friend acts this way?

Q.   Hi lovely cupids, I have a question about a friends behaviour. Me and my best friend are so close and we do so much together. We’re both in relationships, for context. However, I have noticed that when we go out, she seems to flirt with guy...

A.   1 June 2024: 1. She is jealous OR she is just very competitive. You can choose to either sit back and watch the show or excuse yourself and leave - up to you. She sounds exhausting. ... (read in full...)

Me, My Friend, Her Daughter & the awkward Theatre issue!

Q.   For my friends birthday I decided to treat her to watch a musical. She loves the theatre but rarely gets to go due to cash being tight. The other issue she has is she suffers from vertigo so cannot be sat up anywhere remotely high (she’s had a cou...

A.   1 June 2024: Go with someone else. Don't give her your ticket and stop talking to her, what a RUDE "friend". You gave her an inch (the ticket) and she took a mile (wanting YOUR ticket too). What in the World?! This is not a friend, OP This is a ... (read in full...)

I got involved with engaged co worker and made her choose

Q.   Hi everyone! Here's my situation: two and a half years ago a new coworker arrived into the company I've been working with for the last 7 years. A couple of weeks after she arrived, she started to flirt with me in a real intense way, I mean, she...

A.   29 May 2024: " I also would like to ask her if HE knew about our flirt in order to put the whole story to an end." Don't. By asking you are making it seem like you still have the hots for her (which you might but you need to rein that in) - instead STOP giv... (read in full...)

The guy I'm dating doesn't make any effort

Q.   i have feelings for this guy but he always lets me down because he has to work or his been sick he says he has feelings for me and knows he should make more of an effort should i give him the benefit of the doubt or should i just move on because ...

A.   28 May 2024: How long have you known him? And if you are the one making all the effort, is it really worth it your time to keep trying? Of course, he can be present and make an effort when you DO see each other, because HE gets something out of it. I'... (read in full...)

Was what I did that bad?

Q.   I was joking around and maybe gossiping but not in a mean way about one of the managers sexuality and I asked a couple coworkers I thought were friendly if they thought she was gay or not. Part of me was being nosey and the other was curious because ...

A.   20 May 2024: "Was what I did that bad?!" What are you? 5? Yes, it's COMMON sense that you don't run your mouth about your manager and her sexuality. It's also borderline creepy. "The sad thing is the manager and I used to be good friends or talk quite... (read in full...)

Hes asking for space because his wife is upset about their split

Q.   I’ve been seeing a man for a few months who was honest from the onset that he was very recently separated from his wife. We’d been seeing one another for about 3 months when he said he wanted to tell his ex wife that he’d met someone else and knew ...

A.   17 May 2024: OP, you need to wish him well and walk away from this guy. He is still WAY too invested in his "soon-to-be-ex-wife". He is not OVER the "looming" end of his marriage. He NEEEDS to deal with the end of his marriage and break up, move ON and be s... (read in full...)

Cut ties with my controlling family only to have to deal with fiancés controlling family

Q.   I feel like im reliving my past and cannot go through it all again. I have a very toxic family- I’m not going to go in to details however they had zero boundaries and never took accountability for anything. They mentally wore me down. I en...

A.   13 May 2024: OK you have a fiancé problem not an in-law problem. "he is un phased saying it’s how his family are, and he doesn’t mind. " So he is OK with it. He is also OK with YOU not being OK with it. I'd hold off on the wedding. This is not goi... (read in full...)

Girls preference on guys pubic hair

Q.   Hey girls, I was curious of your personal preference when it comes to a guys grooming down below? Also, what are your thoughts on chest hair?...

A.   13 May 2024: Keep it neat, clean and trimmed. All shaved looks weird on an adult IMHO. Chest hairs are nice, just don't like it when they grow up over the collarbones and continue down the back. Back hair is a no-no for me. But generally, DO you.... (read in full...)

Guy at work flirted with me but dropped me for another. Do I confront him?

Q.   There is a guy at work who I thought likes me, but now he behaves as though he hates me. He would always come and try to talk to me and flirt with me, but I realized he liked another girl as well,and because he was talking to me, the girl became ...

A.   10 May 2024: Should I confront him? Nah, you should THANK your lucky star that the slimy office Don Juan has moved on from you. He didn't like YOU - he liked the attention you gave him, and he LIKED that it makes another woman jealous. If you are look... (read in full...)

I am done and he won't grow up

Q.   I recently broke up with my partner of 6 yrs. We started dating and after a whirlwind I found out I was pregnant after my contraception failed. This was a huge shock to me as I had a child already with my precious husband and wasn't planning on ...

A.   8 May 2024: " but has told me that if I decide not to take him back then he will not be friends atal and he will not have any contact with me unless it's over our child. " GOOD! You do not NEED to be "friends with this guy, you DO NOT need to TALK to this... (read in full...)

Am I weird for wanting this lifestyle?

Q.   My whole life I’ve never wanted the traditional family life - ie getting married and having children of my own. I’ve always wanted to marry an older man with grown up children and be part of their life, I guess I’ve always wanted a ready ma...

A.   8 May 2024: Op, you say you are in your late 30's, so why are you still taking the critiques of family and friend about who you should date? I could see a parent being concerned if you were in your early 20's and wanting to date men in their 50 or 60 because ... (read in full...)

He just wants casual sex

Q.   i have been sleeping with a guy a few times and he said he does not want a relationship however recently his been kissing me really sensually touching my hair stroking me cuddling staying the night and telling me we have more of a connection than ...

A.   4 May 2024: I think you should LISTEN to what he is saying. He knows FULL well that in order to get SEX (casually) he has to make you WANT to have sex with him. As SOON as you mention relationship or commitment, he will tell you, that he clarified that h... (read in full...)

Why did my neighbour lie to me about her experience at the restaurant where I work?

Q.   I work part time at a small family run restaurant. As well as working there I often go there for dinner too. The food is amazing and service is wonderful. My neighbor a while back was asking about the restaurant as she and her sister wante...

A.   3 May 2024: Well, now you know what kind of COW your neighbor is. She is someone who will lie to gain attention and probably to make YOU feel bad. I'd stay away from this woman. I'd still wave/say hi, but socialize with her? Absolutely not. ... (read in full...)

Her kids monopolize all of her time!!

Q.   Not exactly a huge issue compared to some things on here but annoying none-the less…. I don’t have children so I’m probably going to be told this is normal and im in the wrong…. One of my best friends lives 40 minutes away from me. Neither of...

A.   2 May 2024:  OP find a better friend. Her kids are ALL old enough to understand that mom is on the phone, give her some privacy and space. Except, SHE never taught them? Her kids are probably her whole World. But also, they ARE more important to her... (read in full...)

Where and how did things deteriorate to this extent with my brother and his wife?

Q.   I got married 8 years ago. My wife is stunning, intelligent and everything that I (or anyone) could ever ask for. My parents were very happy when I introduced her to them, as was my brother. My brother is a couple of years younger to me and was ...

A.   2 May 2024: Oh, your poor brother and those poor kids! Sounds like YOUR wife did nothing wrong, the SIL is just a sad and envious person. My guess is your brother stepped on his own dick and at some point, called your wife pretty or gorgeous in SIL'... (read in full...)

Is it time to leave the marriage?

Q.   My husband doesn't value me and doesn't believe me, I feel like I have to "prove" things to him. I've been married for 9 years, my husband and I get along well and are good friends. If we could afford to live separately, our marriage would p...

A.   2 May 2024: What is your goal? To be financially secure or to have a happy marriage? It seems you can't "quite" have both with this guy. At least not the latter. The thing is OP, your partner doesn't KNOW how to fulfill your needs. He was probably N... (read in full...)

I got involved with engaged co worker and made her choose

Q.   Hi everyone! Here's my situation: two and a half years ago a new coworker arrived into the company I've been working with for the last 7 years. A couple of weeks after she arrived, she started to flirt with me in a real intense way, I mean, she...

A.   31 March 2024: What is it that you like about her? Her lack of respect for her fiancé? For you? For really any man? Her lack of morals and decorum? The fact that she NEVER really cared about you? Because she didn't. ALL she seems to care about is getting... (read in full...)

Did I handle things wrong? Need some encouraging words

Q.   Back in December I attended a Christmas work party. They had hired some hostesses to go around the party and offer different food and drinks. I spoke to one of them and she seemed more receptive to conversation than the others. I spoke to her a few ...

A.   27 March 2024: I know that you meant well, it's kind of clear to see. However, you seem a bit oblivious that the woman was WORKING an event, SHE wasn't there for men to hit on her. At the first even, she turned you down in the NICEST way she could think of, and ... (read in full...)

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