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*rtian

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Hello

I have interests in culture and psychology.

If there is a question that I feel I know something about through my experience and or research I will answer it as honesty and accurately as possible. All answers / comments are meant without prejudice and are simply an opinion and I endeavour it to be countable and of true value.

"What is wisdom but seeking to know the truth and when we find it we know another truth waiting to be reached on the horizon"

"Life is not all a merriment but is all entertainment, Enjoy as much as possible"

Latest articles:

Morals

This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

9 March 2009: A bird with inadequate wings that uses another bird's wings to fly is taking a great risk. A bird that decides that anothers wings are unsuitable and ditches them whilst in flight is a dangerous bird! A bird that uses anothers wings and takes ...

12Next > [2 pages, 43 answers]

Serious all consuming jealousy!

Q.   There is this girl that always wrote on my bf's friendster wall..i asked him bout it bfore and he said he never met her before,she is just sumone he knew from friendster..i think he knew her before he met me..anyway,what really really annoys me is ...

A.   16 March 2009: Its normal to get a little jealous but I would try not to let it get out of hand. Try simply just talking to him about it and tell him what you are feeling. You don't have to look cool just be relaxed about it and honest but try to avoid verbal... (read in full...)

Moral Dilemma - should I have an affair with a married man?

Q.   I've been thinking about having an affair with a 50 year old married man. He has made it very clear to me that he is married, has children and is not going to leave his family. I honestly do not care because I'm not looking for a relationship with ...

A.   16 March 2009: I would seriously consider the fact that he is so much older than you. Not that the age gap is a problem as such but the fact that he has so much more life experience than you and in a committed marriage. It is much easier for someone to paint... (read in full...)

I love to have sex all day and all night

Q.   Hi, I'm 19 years old and i have a problem. I love to have sex...all day and night. I tend to scare many girls off...... at first they tend to like it and then get annoyed by it and they just end up leaving me. what different can i do to keep the...

A.   16 March 2009: Imagine having sex with a girl/woman you really didn't want too! Would it be good sex? Ask yourself is that what your doing to them? If your trying to make love with someone that does not want too you might as well have sex with a card boar... (read in full...)

Moral Dilemma - should I have an affair with a married man?

Q.   I've been thinking about having an affair with a 50 year old married man. He has made it very clear to me that he is married, has children and is not going to leave his family. I honestly do not care because I'm not looking for a relationship with ...

A.   16 March 2009: If you do it you might have a good time, good sex, gifts, all the stuff you like to get what he wants to have SOME of him. Bottom line is he is a cheat... and you'll be to. He probably is not being honest with you either and that is probably self ... (read in full...)

What he's done has just shattered my soul!!!

Q.   I broke up with my boyfriend at the end of january. It was sort of getting distant in the end there and I realized he'd been sort of confused about things. I kinda was trying to end it because of how he was treating me.. our relationship didn't last ...

A.   15 March 2009: Your Soul has been around for thousands of years, it will not shatter that easily! What has shattered is your concept if the relationship. It's just a concept! It's just the way you were thinking and that will most definitely change. The pain ... (read in full...)

I love to have sex all day and all night

Q.   Hi, I'm 19 years old and i have a problem. I love to have sex...all day and night. I tend to scare many girls off...... at first they tend to like it and then get annoyed by it and they just end up leaving me. what different can i do to keep the...

A.   15 March 2009: a loving reAlationship needs: Intimacy, Passion, Commitment. That is to each other not just the sex organs! If you put that last she would probably appreciate it a lot more. Have fun.... (read in full...)

No confidence! Don't know how to meet people?

Q.   Hi folks, I am stuck in a bit of a rut. My belief in my ability to find a relationship. I used to believe the main issue was being overweight. But I realise whilst it might be a factor, it isn't the single thing that prevents me from finding so...

A.   14 March 2009: confidence? what is that? 1. full trust; belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing: We have every confidence in their ability to succeed. 2. belief in oneself and one's powers or abilities; self-confiden... (read in full...)

How can I become more than just friends?

Q.   what do you do when you really like your friend but he not atrracted to you in a sexully way...

A.   12 March 2009: Its always best to be friends first rather than rush into a sexual relation If anthying more develops, great, but do not rush. If nothing develops its probably a good thing a good relationship should be mutual otherwise its just infatua... (read in full...)

I wish I knew what he was thinking. Have I blown it?

Q.   Hey so i met this boy months ago in a bar, we started talking (as you do) he added me on facebbok and that. Anyway we started texting eachother for a while but then i kinda got bored, had a lot on so i kinda faded away from texting him. I bump...

A.   12 March 2009: I think he is now playing 'hard to get' because he thought thats what you were doing. There could be a possibility he has someone else but it does not sound that way by what you are saying. maybe you feel you want him now because it looks... (read in full...)

Can a man tell if a woman has orgasmed?

Q.   I'm not talking about the physical stuff that women do when they orgasm (like shaking, moaning, etc.); more like the internal. If they're having intercourse, can a man tell that a woman has orgasmed by the change in her vagina (it contracts)?...

A.   12 March 2009: Yes, Eyes dilate Irregular breathing Swollen vagina Clitorus retracts Tightening vagina Crazy heart rate Floppy body Ejaculation Extra red lips Big smile Give her a kiss! ... (read in full...)

What does sex feel like?

Q.   I'm not trying to be a smart aleck or anything like that; just naturally curious. I am a 25-year old female virgin (call me old fashioned but I plan to wait until marriage to have sex). I cannot wait to have sex and was wondering what it fe...

A.   12 March 2009: Hey I'm a little confused with your answer there jess?? 'The feeling of sex can largely be determined by the shape of the vagina' is that from the male or female point of view? My guess its from the male because how would one woman know wha... (read in full...)

What does sex feel like?

Q.   I'm not trying to be a smart aleck or anything like that; just naturally curious. I am a 25-year old female virgin (call me old fashioned but I plan to wait until marriage to have sex). I cannot wait to have sex and was wondering what it fe...

A.   12 March 2009: Sorry, Don't mean to be a smarty pants either. But, If you cant wait to have sex why plan to wait! and why make it harder for yourself with the curiosity questions that might make you be unable to wait and ruin your plans but if you cant wait th... (read in full...)

Is this normal jealousy?

Q.   I've been with my girlfriend for a long time now, about five years. We've had an awesome relationship which has been happy and intimate and very promising. She's affectionate and tender with me. We spent a lot of time together and had a lot of fun ...

A.   11 March 2009: well, I think it normal to be jealous of a partner from time to time. If, However, it becomes an obsession it becomes very difficult. Firstly I would ask myself: Do I really love her and am I showing that commitment, passion, and intimacy... (read in full...)

I feel like my life is longer my own. What should I do?

Q.   I’ve been with my g/f about 5 months now and I really like and care for her but she keeps saying that she loves me and gets upset when I can’t reciprocate. I want to be able to say it but just know it isn’t true yet. Will this change for me? The tr...

A.   11 March 2009: well, sounds like you got someone who likes you a lot and is infatuated with you. Love is mutual in my book and it has to be a two way thing or its not love. She might feel she loves you and is willing to put the commitment in. If you are there ... (read in full...)

I think I'm in love with her, I don't know what to do

Q.   Hi I have been seen this girl for almost two years now, she has two children an no one to father them, well he is there but once in a blue moon. They are separated an never getting along. Know for the past six or seven months we have been hanging ...

A.   11 March 2009: I would tell her that you value the friendship very much and don't want to ruin that and you have strong feelings for her. It would be great to be an item and be with her and assist her as her boyfriend but will understand if she wants to keep it ... (read in full...)

B/f smells so bad "down there" I almost gag!

Q.   Hello all, My problem is simple. My boyfriend smells horrendously bad "down there" and I can barely give him a blow job without gagging. I usually just breath through my mouth but I would prefer my nose (its just easier that way). Anywho, it s...

A.   11 March 2009: It could be something simple like Balantitis. That is a hygiene problem that can arise from taking antibiotics or simply not washing down there everyday. I am not a Doctor so I agree he should go and see one and get it ruled out and put both you... (read in full...)

What is meant by this?

Q.   What is meant by 'mind and heart tease eachother'? I have been trying to work it out but with no avail. Any insight to this would be great. ...

A.   11 March 2009: This is a metaphorical question. Mind = logic and reason Heart = feelings and passion Sometimes you can think things are wrong or right but you feel the contrary. Ie, you could meet girl you never thought you would fancy but you feel spe... (read in full...)

How does an age gap affect a relationship??

Q.   How does an age gap affect a relationship? Explain whats good and bad when you have a 20years gap boyfriend?...

A.   11 March 2009: The main effects are the social pressures and comments from others regarding your status. Others opinions and prejudices can have an effect and cause troubling times. Regards to good and bad, that all depends on what you experience in th... (read in full...)

How does an age gap affect a relationship??

Q.   How does an age gap affect a relationship? Explain whats good and bad when you have a 20years gap boyfriend?...

A.   10 March 2009: Age gaps are fine because there are all sorts of reasons why different ages are attracted to each other. Girls mature more quickly than boys. Thus, older guy younger woman. However, When a womans age approaches 45-50 thing become different... (read in full...)

He thinks my body BELONGS to him!!!!

Q.   My boyfriend of 4 months says I'm his... therefore so is my body, supposedly we love each other. He says he does, his hands are always all over me, alone or not! Once we are in a private place and he wouldn't stop! I don't mind that but I do mind ...

A.   10 March 2009: He sounds a little to excited and eager to me!!!!!!! Totally unacceptable!!! He needs educating rapidly!!!!! Tell him straight; You are smothering me! You do not own me! I do what I want when I want! Not when you say! I ha... (read in full...)

Online in the last 30 days..what does that mean?

Q.   I know this might sound dumb..but what does it mean when a profile dating site says, 'online last 30 days' Does that mean he hasn't logged on just recently, but yes in the last 30 days?...

A.   10 March 2009: It means not logged on visibly for about that time.... (read in full...)

Why Anal sex

Q.   Why does a man want to have anal sex with his wife? Why that kind of sex? ...

A.   10 March 2009: Anal sex can seem a dirty act but is fine if your personal hygiene is up to scratch and you have a clean before and after just like vaginal sex. Why some people like it so much (women) is because the nerve endings in the anus are directly connecte... (read in full...)

How do we know when enough is enough?

Q.   if two people are in love but cant seem to get they're shit together how do they know enough is enough?...

A.   10 March 2009: If you love each other and mutually do not want to split why not go and see a relationship counselor? By doing that you can both get your feelings out in a controlled environment with a trained professional and get to the bottom of the situatio... (read in full...)

How do we know when enough is enough?

Q.   if two people are in love but cant seem to get they're shit together how do they know enough is enough?...

A.   10 March 2009: If you love each other and don't want to spit as long as that is mutual why not go see a relationship counselor? get your feelings out properly in an environment that you cant really have a full blown argument and get to the bottom of it. g... (read in full...)

What do the words "I love you" mean and why would you say it?

Q.   What do the words "I love you" mean and why would you say it?...

A.   10 March 2009: If I say 'I love you' it means that I know that person cares about me enjoys my company and wants the best for me and I feel the same about them. ie friend child parent girlfriend / boyfriend wife / husband However, this term is also... (read in full...)

Boyfriend looks at other women when hes with me

Q.   Is it normal for my boyfriend to look at another woman while with me? It really makes me feel awful and I've told him this many times but he doesn't seem to stop. Please help! ...

A.   10 March 2009: We all look what is around us. If I am in a relationship I still notice and look at other women. However, this does NOT mean I would choose to be with them. Obviously, when you met your partner he was looking at women to have noticed you and yo... (read in full...)

What do the words "I love you" mean and why would you say it?

Q.   What do the words "I love you" mean and why would you say it?...

A.   10 March 2009: I think it should mean Intimate about passionate about and committed too. or, It could mean someone is trying to make you feel those things for a gain of 'something'. This could include; sex, money, etc etc. Some use love tactic... (read in full...)

Why Anal sex

Q.   Why does a man want to have anal sex with his wife? Why that kind of sex? ...

A.   10 March 2009: Sex is about exploring is it not? This should be about pleasure and not goal orientated. Perhaps he wants to find out if he likes it or he knows he likes it but has not done it with that person. So, perhaps he wants to find out if his wife ... (read in full...)

Life is too short for...

Q.   I've realised something which has taken me around 18 years to figure out...I'm writing this article as theremay be some people out there who still haven't figured this out! 'Life is too short' is the best expression ever, it can help you to make des...

A.   10 March 2009: Life is to short to worry! If you worry it wont fix it If you don't worry it wont fix it So, whats the best to do?... (read in full...)

How can you make a woman feel special and sexy and during foreplay?

Q.   How can you make a woman feel really special and make her feel really sexy during foreplay?...

A.   10 March 2009: Yes, I agree. Less is more. Touch every where but the vagina and nipples then she will be waiting for you to do so and feeling will build. she'll probably ask you to do so when she cant wait no more. ... (read in full...)

Should I continue to justify my resentment, or should I just move on?

Q.   I know I have a huge anger problem. I have had this problem since I was little. I know the cause of the problem; I just don’t know how to plan for a positive outcome. I know that a lot of my problem comes from early childhood when my mother and I ...

A.   10 March 2009: hey, sounds like a pretty messy time you have had. I would simply ask myself do I need to put up with this stuff? Does he love you? Or just fixated to you? For me, Love = Intimacy, Passion, and commitment. Is it mutual? I think by p... (read in full...)

How do we deal with racial insults?

Q.   I'm 23, my girlfriend's 25 and from Germany originally, and we've been together for 2 years since we met at university together. We live together, and are doing well in our respective employment. Our relationship is great, however, ...

A.   10 March 2009: Report every incident to the police. You don't have to call out the police for all incidents just ask for a log number and take a diary of all yourself. Also report it to the local council or housing association. They should give assistance. When ... (read in full...)

Morals

Q.   A bird with inadequate wings that uses another bird's wings to fly is taking a great risk. A bird that decides that anothers wings are unsuitable and ditches them whilst in flight is a dangerous bird! A bird that uses anothers wings and takes ...

A.   10 March 2009: The rest is something that I have recently discovered and think is a bold reality.... (read in full...)

How can you make a woman feel special and sexy and during foreplay?

Q.   How can you make a woman feel really special and make her feel really sexy during foreplay?...

A.   9 March 2009: That depends on how far you are into the relationship? If its early 'less is more' you don't want to seem to eager. If your both getting serious tell her the truth about what you feel and how you appreciate her. ... (read in full...)

Morals

Q.   A bird with inadequate wings that uses another bird's wings to fly is taking a great risk. A bird that decides that anothers wings are unsuitable and ditches them whilst in flight is a dangerous bird! A bird that uses anothers wings and takes ...

A.   9 March 2009: The last line I read many years ago. (",)... (read in full...)

Have you ever been there? Losing the love of you life and there's nothing you can do?

Q.   Hi, i tried to talk with my friends and family but i dont think they quite understand what i am feeling. so heres the story i started to date my ex boyfriend when we were 15 at first i thought it was a relationship like any other but i was wrong our ...

A.   9 March 2009: Unfortunately, love is as much pain as joy. But, if you do not experience love then you do not experience the depths of your heart. So, embrace the feeling and discover new bounds. The storm WILL pass. The sun will rise again. O... (read in full...)

Life is too short for...

Q.   I've realised something which has taken me around 18 years to figure out...I'm writing this article as theremay be some people out there who still haven't figured this out! 'Life is too short' is the best expression ever, it can help you to make des...

A.   9 March 2009: Good stuff, (",) Life is to short to sacrifice love for money! ... (read in full...)

Are all guys like this? "geez, its just a game!"

Q.   Are all men like my boyfriend? Impatient?!? Or is it a guy thing where they think they are always right, no matter what?!? Ok, so my boyfriend will never, I mean never admit that he's wrong! If I'm wrong, I'll admit it. But if he's wrong, he'l...

A.   9 March 2009: Hi, Sounds like the alpha male play to me. Acting the big man with games? I would take this with a pinch of salt. Its probably quite amusing yeah! as you know he's just a bad loser and playing it off. If he is always saying your wrong then a... (read in full...)

My fiancee wants an abortion, but the thought of it makes me sick. What should I do?

Q.   Hi everyone. My fiancee was scared to death of becoming pregnant and now she is. We use contraception but nothing is 100% as you all know. She has always been adamant that she will get an abortion regardless of whether I want it or not and she says ...

A.   9 March 2009: Simple, think If when you had sex did you ask her to have your baby! If she didn't want sex with you would you demand it! was sex for enjoyment? was sex for a baby? was sex for enjoyment and a baby? If she said and you knew she ... (read in full...)

My fiancee wants an abortion, but the thought of it makes me sick. What should I do?

Q.   Hi everyone. My fiancee was scared to death of becoming pregnant and now she is. We use contraception but nothing is 100% as you all know. She has always been adamant that she will get an abortion regardless of whether I want it or not and she says ...

A.   9 March 2009: Abortion, Without prejudice Avery difficult situation to make a correct turn in? A common thing and therefore this situation happens to many people. Is it goo is it bad? It happens for reasons! I don't think anybody really likes it ... (read in full...)

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