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*oubleM agony aunt


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DoubleM currently resides in Fort Worth Texas, but has lived in southern California (Hollywood), Hawaii, Europe and North Africa as well as Texas. Attended the University of Texas. Now single (possibly forever) after three marriages, one of 20 years. Mainly tries to help with sexual issues. Views and opinions are very permissive and suggestions are often brief and to the point.

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Is oral sex harmful?

Q.   My girlfriend gives me blowjobs. Does it is harmful or bad for her???...

A.   8 November 2014: Not at all... (read in full...)

Do guys go to bars and clubs only to get laid?

Q.   Is it true that guys go to bars and clubs only to get laid? I just talked to a guy, a friend, and he said that the only reason he goes out is to get laid that night. He said, it's the cheapest way to have sex when he wants it and the fastest,...

A.   2 November 2014: Some are like that and will pay dearly.... (read in full...)

If he cheats to be with you, does that mean he will 100 per cent cheat ON YOU?

Q.   Hi everyone. I have been dating a married man for almost a year and a half. He does have genuine feelings for me and we have great sex and chemistry and a good friendship. He is comfortable with his wife and not leaving. I am not totally okay w...

A.   25 October 2014: Very likely... (read in full...)

My friends tell me I should give my boyfriend a BJ

Q.   A lot of my friends are wanting me to give my boyfriend a blowjob, and he agreed to wanting me too when i asked. But i feel like we are kind of young for this to be happening. My friends said it was okay because we have been dating for 6 months, but ...

A.   2 May 2014: You are too young for that.... (read in full...)

Oral sex with no protection..should I worry about disease?

Q.   I'm in the habit of frequenting sex workers on a weekly basis. Now, I typically use condoms where penetrative sex is concerned but there have been occasions where I've received unprotected oral sex. I've done some research and apparently, it's ...

A.   1 May 2014: I'll agree with others. It is definitely possible to contract STDs via oral sex.... (read in full...)

Do women care about premature ejaculation from a bj?

Q.   I tend to have a problem with coming too quickly and so I expend a lot of effort trying to make sure I don't. Obviously this is an issue with vaginal sex, but what about with oral sex? I try not to orgasm too quickly when receiving oral, but...

A.   29 April 2014: Seems most of the ladies here prefer a fairly quick shot of cum. I've had many, many bjs in my 60+ years and usually cum within about five minutes if I know the woman likes the load and swallows. Dozens of women in my life have enjoyed the ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend never initiates sex!

Q.   Dear agony aunts and uncles I am having a slight problem with my bf he never initiates sex. We have been together for almost a year and I can remember only about five times when he has and we have sex at least four times a month I asked him why ...

A.   28 January 2014: Your celibate plan might work, but everyone is different and who knows? The libido of some people differs and change from time to time.... (read in full...)

How do I tell them in bed ..... "dont do that"?

Q.   So I've been with a few partners so far, I use birth control and condoms and all that and get tested regularly and make sure my partners do the same. Almost every guy I've been with does a few things that I do not like, things that are almost a ...

A.   5 January 2014: Say "No !!" , , , Or "Stop it !!" And then, if necessary, get up and leave. You are, and must always be, in charge of what you will or will not do! Or what anyone may do with you. Remember this always . . .... (read in full...)

Losing most couples go through that?

Q.   Hi everyone, first want to say happy new year to you all. I know people on here give really great advice so I need some help. When you first get into a relationship everything is amazing at first, you spend all of your time together, hang out ...

A.   4 January 2014: Yes, that happens, but we wouldn't know whether your boyfriend loves you or not.... (read in full...)

How do I know if he wants me for anything more than sex?

Q.   I met this guy at a nightclub when all my friends were busy dancing etc. He approached me as he saw that I was on my own and I liked him so agreed to dance. I try to be subtle and genuine with people. He is currently working in the auto industry...

A.   22 December 2013: Easy. He will do much more for you than mainly just want sex.... (read in full...)

Sex doesn't feel good for me, why?

Q.   I have recently lost my virginity... We have had sex 3 other times since then. It does not fee; good for me whatsoever, its not really painful unless he goes deep inside but I'm curious if its normal that Im not enjoying it yet. I just feel Im too ...

A.   22 December 2013: I'll agree with some others that your boyfriend is inexperienced and knows little about sex. Perhaps you should back-off for awhile, but yes, you will eventually enjoy making love to someone who cares about you.... (read in full...)

Should I wait to have sex with my long distance boyfriend?

Q.   Dear Cupid, For the past 3 1/2 months, I've been involved in a LDR with a man I met at a speed dating event. The type of relationship we've had, has been one of intense passion, adoration, respect and honesty. It definitely wasn't something...

A.   22 December 2013: In my opinion, it's always a good idea for a young woman to refrain for a reasonable time, but I'm grateful that many of the girls I met in all my years were very adventurous. Times are a bit different today, perhaps. ... (read in full...)

How difficult is it supposed to be for a man to orgasm from receiving oral sex?

Q.   Not sure if any of the same people are around or have even read my previous posts, but to update, I've long gotten over my anxiety and have been having a "healthy" sex life. I'd love to ramble about how much better I am at having sex, but let's g...

A.   11 December 2013: Well, I'm uncertain because I never had such a problem (in decades), but suspect that a receiver must have an issue with doing something they consider a bit too naughty. ... (read in full...)

I'm 70 years old struggling with erectile dysfunction and I feel terrible that I cannot satisfy my girlfriend sexually

Q.   Hello. I am 70 years old and active,however I have recently developed the old man's problem Erectile Dysfunction. I have been living with an East European lady whom I adore very much,for over a year now. Anyway with my problem,proper sex is no...

A.   5 December 2013: As a 66-year-old man I went through a period of that a few years ago, which I'm fairly certain was at least partly caused by blood pressure medication. Some do that. I think it was Atenolol. I also have a heart condition, quite serious, but my doct... (read in full...)

I want to watch my wife give oral...

Q.   Let me start by saying my relationship with my wife is AWESOME. Sure we have had some ups and downs, but overall it has been AWESOME. When we dated we were active like rabbits and it didn't really matter where we were, we would find a place to ...

A.   26 November 2013: Well, I'm obviously of an older generation, but I never had any such thoughts with a wife or a girlfriend. Sounds like a real marriage killer to me, but you could send her to Texas and I may oblige. ... (read in full...)

I think my boyfriend is still using porn, and it's affecting our sex life. How should I behave?

Q.   Hello 2 Everyone! Two days ago I discovered my fiancee still uses porn. It was so disgusting and frustrating for me, still he lies. The problem is that is impossible for him to ejaculate when we have sex, even though is always horny. He says h...

A.   23 November 2013: During my youth and much of my married life, porn was mostly unavailable - or difficult to find. Didn't need it. While married, it gradually became more available, and was occasionally, but rarely viewed. I think that it depends on frequency now ... (read in full...)

What can a single guy with a high sex drive do?

Q.   I really don't like masturbating that much, but because I've got such a high sex drive i have to do it for relief. I can masturbate up to 3/4 times a day, and i get horny very quickly - for example i was sitting at the back of the bus behind a girl ...

A.   23 November 2013: You should have talked with the girl, and any other female that catches your eye (if at all possible). Don't be so shy, but don't think in terms of what you do 'to' them - rather be 'with' them. Be pleasant and personable. Some will turn you away, ... (read in full...)

All I want is someone to love me! I need some advice!

Q.   Here we go, I am going to try and do this without breaking down into tears . I have only been divorced since May of 2012 however my husband left in 2008 I met this man and started seeing him and at the time i didnt know he was married because he ...

A.   11 November 2013: Well, I don't think you are ever going to be happy with the guy you described. He is just using you. But goodness, there are a lot of descent men out there.... (read in full...)

Controlling gag reflex during oral sex with a bigger man

Q.   I love giving oral sex, taste or smell are not a deterrent. My current boyfriend has a larger penis, and I would like to know how to stop from gagging. I know I can use my hand to control penetration, but I would like to know how to handle, ...

A.   10 November 2013: I must agree with some others that deep penetration is unnecessary for an enjoyable blow job, and fortunately I've enjoyed too many to mention. Some of the very best were really just concentrated on the tip. The only time I've really preferred a ... (read in full...)

Missionary out, every other position works?

Q.   Okay, so this isn't really an issue, more of a "what the heck is going on" type of situation. quite plainly, when i would have sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position, it would hurt. the odd thing is, it would hurt only around the botto...

A.   10 November 2013: During my most active years, some girlfriends complained of pain or discomfort in some positions, so we would simply experiment until a different position eliminated the problem. I'm a bit larger down there than most men, perhaps, but really not ... (read in full...)

Is there something wrong that I'm so fixated on oral?

Q.   I don't know what to think about my sexual desires, am I a pervert for loving to give oral sex to women? At times it's to the point where i don't even care if they do anything in bed with me as long as I can make them orgasm giving them oral sex. I ...

A.   10 November 2013: Well, I don't think it's so perverted. You say that you also have intercourse, and enjoy receiving oral from a swallowing girlfriend. Sounds pretty good to me. Perhaps I have been extremely lucky to have had so many girlfriends, and a wife, who ... (read in full...)

Do you think he noticed what I am not getting in bed?

Q.   I've been dating this guys since a little while and we have had sex in 2 occasions. The first time i reached climax through some running with his penis since he didn't lick/finger me. I can't cum purely with penetration. Yesterday he licked me for a ...

A.   8 October 2013: As all previous responders indicated, talk about it honestly. A good man will at least try to please his woman. ... (read in full...)

What are some new ways to seduce my wife and spice things up?

Q.   I've been married to my wife for six years. We have two children, the first was born about a year after we started dating, so we really haven't had a lot of time for ourselves. In her culture (Central American) it's more common for babies to stay in ...

A.   6 October 2013: The use of a well-educated tongue can usually solve any such problem.... (read in full...)

Why can't he cum during oral sex?

Q.   During oral sex my boyfriend gets himself close to cumming and his breathing changes and all these normal things but he can't!! I'm pretty sure it's not me because he has no problem with handjobs and when he's in the shower he can't. In pretty sure ...

A.   30 September 2013: In my opinion, "olderthandirt" has it right. Some guys either don't really enjoy oral, or they think that cumming into a girlfriend's mouth is somehow nasty. I was fortunate to have a number of girlfriends and a wife who all enjoyed it, even craved ... (read in full...)

Really want to do oral but can't

Q.   Hi aunts and uncles! Thank you in advance for all the help. I'm 19 years old and i'm in a very serious relationship with a guy 6 years my senior. We've been together for just over a year now. My problem is i'm afraid of letting him go own on me ...

A.   29 September 2013: Labia appearance does not matter at all. Perhaps you think of oral sexual activity as "dirty." If between healthy people without sexual disease, then oral is safe and should not be considered dirty or nasty. Just maintain reasonable cleanliness.... (read in full...)

How can I not be tight after having sex just once?

Q.   Hi guys! I wanna ask some advice from u. I have a first boyfriend now at my 28yrs of age. He's been my bf for a week. Then he was assigned to my area and s0mething happened to us. It is my first time to have sex in my entire life. I wanna ask why is ...

A.   29 September 2013: It is not possible that you have become "loose" after once, or even many years, of sexual penetration. The body adapts. Your guy may be rather small, but in any case, don't worry about this! ... (read in full...)

What's the difference between "real sex" and soft, vanilla-porn?

Q.   I have yet to be in a relationship or, as pathetic as it is to admit, have sex (mostly because - and it's not a low self-esteem thing - I'm unattractive; women aren't interested in me, never have and it seems like never will; I get it, and I'm okay ...

A.   29 September 2013: Your main question: "What's the difference?" Answer: Reality. And in regard to not being all that attractive: There are a lot of fairly unattractive young women as well. They need love too.... (read in full...)

My boyfriend can't come through intercourse!

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend for about nine months and for the most part I couldn't be happier - he's kind, caring, trustworthy, funny and smart, and I think he's gorgeous. But there's something missing: vaginal Iintercourse is rare and brief. ...

A.   17 August 2013: In my opinion, that's rather unusual for a man (presumably) in his age range. It may be due to excessive masturbation either currently or in the past. The aforementioned possibility of medication is also something to investigate, if applicable. ... (read in full...)

Went against advice and lost my virginity to a FWB and I loved it. Has anyone else done this and not regretted their actions?

Q.   Hi. I have a question concerning my first time. I lost my virginity about a month ago to my fwb. Many people advised me against it seeing as there is no emotional attachment or significance. However i loved it so much. It was such a thrilling and ...

A.   1 August 2013: Well, you can be absolutely certain that you are hardly the first young woman to enjoy a first evening of sex that way. Duh! I'm a "child" of the 1960s-70s. Back then, it seemed that a majority of young folks were screwing like rabbits. It was ... (read in full...)

At what age did you really start to enjoy life?

Q.   I turned 21 over the summer. I am single with no kids. I am a full-time college student and I will be graduating next year with a degree in accounting. I live at my parent's house, and I work part-time. I have never really felt so low and depressed ...

A.   26 July 2013: I think that happiness periods during your life do tend to depend on your health. But briefly, a few things stand out to me now that I'm now considered a "senior" and some things I've done are now affecting my health. Best advice: don't smoke! F... (read in full...)

Why do men make such a big deal about my orgasming with them? Is it my issue or his?

Q.   Every man I have been with has always made such a big deal out of me not having orgasms with them. It's like they are personally insulted by it or something? why? what's the big deal? I have only orgasmed with someone once through penetrat...

A.   10 July 2013: It's more him than you, in my opinion. While it is true that many women, possibly most, rarely if ever orgasm via penetration alone, it is up to the man to discover what pleases you. ... (read in full...)

Difficulty with intercourse

Q.   My Vagina is too small and penis not getting in to this. When try to push it feeling burning sensation. Kindly suggest what should I do now.. ...

A.   20 April 2013: Unless there is some very unusual physical abnormality, a vagina too small or tight for intercourse is extremely unlikely. As previously suggested, adequate foreplay, perhaps with the aid of lubricant, should allow intercourse. Patience on the part ... (read in full...)

Are there guys out there who actually don't like strip clubs?

Q.   Are there guys out there who actually DON'T like strip clubs? I live in a mining town and strip clubs are starting to pop up everywhere, and since mining is a very male dominated field, guys go there after work to bond, and blah blah. I've been ...

A.   4 September 2012: In my case, no. Been a couple of times over the last 40 years and it doesn't do anything for me.... (read in full...)

Do I leave my wife over breast implants?

Q.   my wife lies to me she had a breast implants done without my permission i dont like it what will i do. leave her?...

A.   4 September 2012: Would have been nice to consult you, but I would not leave her for that,... (read in full...)

I have questions about male performance

Q.   I have a question about male performance. I was married for 16 years, and my husband never really satisfied me. His age was 24-39 and mine 33-48 at the time. He could easily become erect, but then as we had sex, he could only keep thrustin...

A.   3 September 2012: Well i don't think that is normal for a man. Most of us do fairly well, and thrust for 15-20 minutes or so. ... (read in full...)

Is it possible to salvage a marriage with all these problems?

Q.   I have been married for a year and our marriage has tons of problems. I don’t even know what exactly needs sorting out now. He was emotionally abusive before we got married. I cheated on him before we got married and have a child from the guy I ch...

A.   3 September 2012: That sounds like a lot of issues. Would seem to be a lot to resolve.... (read in full...)

Boyfriend's family disapproves of our relationship and is forcing him to marry someone else

Q.   This probably an unusual question. I am an English girl living in Spain, For the past 18 months I have been in a relationship with a Hindu man from Delhi. We had planned to marry in November, obviously completely against the wishes of his family. ...

A.   3 September 2012: I'm not Indian, but I suppose you need to let go. ... (read in full...)

How to ask for sex lessions?

Q.   I date an older, more experienced guy, whom I recently lost my virginity to. I'm not sure if this happens to everyone, but having sex made me realize it's pretty awesome and made me well.. want way more. Nevertheless, I'm really shy and have qui...

A.   2 September 2012: Well first of all, blow jobs are not too difficult - you just suck until he cums. What you do with the cum is arbitrary - some swallow and some spit it out. If he is healthy, there is no harm. The other sex moves will come. ... (read in full...)

This guy I met a week ago won't leave me alone!

Q.   I met a guy a week ago, yes that's just a week ago, we talked and generally got on. I told him from the offset that I wasn't looking for anything more than friendship and he seemed cool with that, but now he won't stop calling me. Apparently we are ...

A.   2 September 2012: I agree, don;t take the calls and ignore him. If needed, change your phone number.... (read in full...)

No to a tubal ligation. But I never want to be pregnant. Terrified of it. What can I do?

Q.   I’m a woman aged 28 years old and I’ve very big trouble. I’m dreadfully afraid of pregnancy and it affects my sex life more and more. I’ve a boyfriend, we’re together for two years, but sex has always been a stress for me. I want him and I want s...

A.   2 September 2012: The solution is simple :Get your fallopian tubes tied. I cannot provide the medical information but it's called tubal ligation, I think. It prevents any possibility of pregnancy, usually. ... (read in full...)

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