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Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal.
I heard this quote recently: ""The truth is like castor oil. It’s difficult to take and hard to swallow, so we get them to laugh and while their mouths are open, we pour a little in." -Harold Clurman
If you have an urgent question, please post it on the main page. Real life keeps me busy and has enough going on to keep me from being on here 24/7.... I hope yours does too! ;)
Current book recommendation: Untethered Soul, by Michael Singer. A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. The Power of Now, also by Eckhart Tolle. Really powerful stuff in there about not letting your runaway thoughts take over your life. Be present in the Now. You have what you need, right there, right inside yourself. Do yourself a HUGE favor and read these books. They may lead to an important and fundamental shift in your well-being. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." --Eckhart Tolle
All time fave relationship figure out book: A Fine Romance, Judith Sills, PhD. Buy if you are stuck and can't figure out why he won't commit, or why you keep picking guys who can't commit.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck." -The Dalai Lama
"Most people are doing the best they can, given what they know and understand. Including you. If they knew more and were aware of more, they would do things differently." -- Louise Hay
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain
I like these links right now: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4593/A-Simple-Way-to-Let-Go-of-Our-Negative-Patterns.html
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/04/04/25-life-lessons/
So here's the thing. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Weakness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Actually, according to Albert Einstein, that's the definition of insanity but I think that's a bit of a strong word choice.
“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” -The Dalai Lama.
The choices you make may affect others. Think about the consequences, intended or unintended, before you do something that you may have to explain later. Imagine you are standing in front of a group of people and have to defend what you chose to do.... if you can't manage to do it well, that's a fairly plain indicator it's a bad idea.
If everyone who loves you hates your partner, there might be a problem. If you only have your partner, there IS a problem.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8202/12-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship.html
If he’s mean to you now, he’s only going to get worse. Some people are energy vampires; they feed on the pain they inflict on others. They are broken. They will break you. Get out. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can fix him. You can’t.
You have my permission to say “no.”
If you are depressed, think of it like an illness. You have to treat it. Medicine can help. Talk to your doctor. If you’re drinking a lot, you’re already self-medicating. You might as well get some prescription-grade pharmaceuticals to help you get to a point where you can figure out why you’re self-medicating.
There’s a reason it’s called ‘junk food.’
Yoga is good for the body and the mind as well as soothing the spirit. Try it. Brisk walks are great too.
Don't eat crap. Canned sugary beverages or canned diet beverages are NOT good for you, they have no nutritional value and set you up for a lot of bad stuff. Don't drink them. Water is good. Decide if you can tolerate coffee or tea (I love them both) and then drink those in moderation.
Life is nasty, cold, brutal, unfair, and crappy. It’s also amazing, beautiful, uplifting, awe-inspiring and fun. You choose how you’re going to approach it every day.
I have a few soapboxes that I tend to haul out: I don't like to see people put their health or future at risk and I REALLY don't like to see them put other's health or future at risk. I feel strongly that not providing good sex education or keeping sex education from children is a form of child abuse. It's like sending them out into the world not knowing how to buckle a seatbelt.
I love this video from plannedparenthood.org (How Pregnancy Happens): http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
More good information from plannedparenthood.org on the various methods of birth control:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
I don't have any expertise in abusive relationships, but I do think there are some common sense basics that people who are in one might be missing. Find out more here: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal. |
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| Latest articles: Questions to ask before getting married!
No replies yet... 24 March 2016: I just read a great article in the New York Times online. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married” It was written by Eleanor Stanford and posted March 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com...
Need Christmas or other holiday gift ideas? Look here!
No replies yet... 3 December 2013: Every year, DearCupid sees an influx of questions asking "What should I get for my boyfriend/girlfriend/significant person? Help!" This question has been asked so many times, we suggest our posters use the search feature of the site here: ...
A little primer on women and sex...
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Newest answer was posted
11 November 2011: A Primer on Women and Sex Look, we girls are funny. We don't sexually mature all overnight, our first sexual experiences are often painful, crappy and frankly unfulfilling on many levels. We don't know how to give blowjobs, most of us don't grow up ...
Valentine's Day Gift Ideas
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Newest answer was posted
26 January 2011: Each year, we here at DearCupid see many submissions asking, "What should I get my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/lover/partner for Valentine's Day?" I think it would be great to consolidate these questions and some ideas into one place, so I've ...
Retrograde jealousy
This question has 102 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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25 July 2010: DearCupid sees many stories about men and women who find out after they are married that their partners have more sexual experience or partners than was initially understood. It is a very real problem for the one who is devastated to discover the ...
Advice to young men about young women
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Newest answer was posted
1 May 2008: I posted this as an answer to a young man, a virgin, who wanted to know about his young girlfriend, also a virgin... First, I know it's hard to believe but a girl her age may not know her body very well. She may not know what is sexually stimula...
More than one way to get up the Duff!!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 March 2008: Some us ‘Aunts’ have been entertaining ourselves with fundamental questions about various ways pregnancy occurs…. I remembered that there were strange stories surrounding the births of some of the gods and goddesses of ancient myth, and I had a ...
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FWB who has moved to another state, wants to take our relationship to the next level. Now he wants nude pics of mine. Thoughts?
Q. So here's my dilemma, I a 20yr old woman and last year I left a 4yr relationship and I knew I wanted to be single for a while but as we all know not everything goes as planned. A few months after my break up I met a 23yr old guy in November...
A. 2 July 2011: "I did like him a little but not enough to want to be in a committed serious relationship with him."
"he did want to attempt to take what we have to another level make up more like an unlabeled couple then sex buddys and we decided that we coul... (read in full...)
My married lover now wants a threesome!
Q. I have been in a "relationship" with a married man for 7 years. We see each other every now and again and really enjoy each other physically, emotionally and psychologically. He was always honest with regards to his status and that was fine with me. ...
A. 2 July 2011: You've made it clear you are not into women. You've said no. He either thinks you are a closet bisexual or this little scenario is for HIM, all about HIS psyche. Pretty basic.... (read in full...)
We both got totally drunk and my wife was lying naked next to another guy!
Q. I went with my wife to a party this past weekend and we got completely wasted, neither of us remember the later parts of the night. But all I know is that when I woke up my wife was nowhere near me. When I looked around the house for her, I found ...
A. 1 July 2011: Oh, and I nearly forgot. As you both got so wasted and so drunk, and assuming it wasn't a deliberate drugging on someone else's part, a good place for you two to go is to an AA meeting.
Alcohol can make people do some really stupid things, dang... (read in full...)
We hardly spend anytime together and when we do we jump straight to sex..what can I do?
Q. I started messing around with a guy in April, we started dating in May. It's been almost 2 months goin out with him. But when it all started everything was PERFECT and it was amazing. 3 weeks after we started goin out things started changing...
A. 1 July 2011: You can't fix this, he's the one who has engineered things the way he likes it. He knows you like him and that's why he can get away with it.
I'd ditch him, personally, he's a user and a loser. Sorry!... (read in full...)
We both got totally drunk and my wife was lying naked next to another guy!
Q. I went with my wife to a party this past weekend and we got completely wasted, neither of us remember the later parts of the night. But all I know is that when I woke up my wife was nowhere near me. When I looked around the house for her, I found ...
A. 1 July 2011: Oh, never mind, the test for rohypnol is only useful 72 hours after the drug is administered. Sorry. You may indeed have reason to be angry with her but there is the chance that this was a planned attack on her. I don't know how you go about finding ... (read in full...)
We both got totally drunk and my wife was lying naked next to another guy!
Q. I went with my wife to a party this past weekend and we got completely wasted, neither of us remember the later parts of the night. But all I know is that when I woke up my wife was nowhere near me. When I looked around the house for her, I found ...
A. 1 July 2011: Get her and yourself to a doctor and have her tested to see if she was given 'rufies' or rohypnol, the so-called 'date rape' drug. Just on the off-chance this was a set up. It would be a great shame for you to flip out only to find out later she'd ... (read in full...)
No pregnancy options?
Q. I haven't had sex, and I don't plan on it anytime soon, but I am curious. If I were to be on the pill, have the guy have a condom on, make him pull out properly, and take the morning after pill...what are the chances I would become pregnant? Is it ...
A. 1 July 2011: I found these links for you to read. They will help you understand more about birth control. Later on, when you become sexually active, you can discuss what would work best for you with your gynecologist. http:/... (read in full...)
My married lover now wants a threesome!
Q. I have been in a "relationship" with a married man for 7 years. We see each other every now and again and really enjoy each other physically, emotionally and psychologically. He was always honest with regards to his status and that was fine with me. ...
A. 1 July 2011: He's obsessed with it because he's having a major fantasy about it and isn't too concerned with your feelings. I guess he's pushing on you to do it because he feels he can convince you to do things you don't like?
Maybe it's a midlife crisis, mayb... (read in full...)
She has let me back into her life a little, how do I get her back from here?
Q. advice required. ive previously asked for help with the situation with my x the woman i loved. basically over the course of last 6/7 years ive constantly flirted, emailed, texted other women and messed around, never once have i done anything...
A. 1 July 2011: I see you've posted a LOT on this breakup and how hard it has been on your feelings. I'd say you're not making any headway with her for a couple of reasons.
One, you basically lied to her for 6/7 years. That's pretty hard to forgive. At the leas... (read in full...)
FWB who has moved to another state, wants to take our relationship to the next level. Now he wants nude pics of mine. Thoughts?
Q. So here's my dilemma, I a 20yr old woman and last year I left a 4yr relationship and I knew I wanted to be single for a while but as we all know not everything goes as planned. A few months after my break up I met a 23yr old guy in November...
A. 1 July 2011: "well now a days that's considered normal let's be real." Just because a lot of people do it doesn't make it a smart thing to do. Lots of people drink too much and drive too. Or smoke and think they won't have health consequences.
"I've never sent... (read in full...)
How do I boost my self confidence? Please help!
Q. Hi. Am female, 21, about 4 ft 11 and am not physicaly developed and because of this, i really lack self confidence. How do i boost my self confidence and how can i dress in a way that will flatter me. Also i have stomach fat, folds and love handles, ...
A. 29 June 2011: You are the same height as a good friend of mine. She is a bundle of energy and great fun to know! I would recommend you follow her path to mental strength and confidence. First, educate your mind. Complete your studies, follow the news, do some ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is becoming more and more distant, does she still love me? Does she not want to be with me because of my illness?
Q. Hello everyone Thank you for takeing the time to read this. A lot has happend these last few months, i got diognosed with skitophenia (sorry still cant spell it) lost my viginity with my girlfreind. Been hospitalised three times for epi...
A. 29 June 2011: Ah. My guess is that your girlfriend is scared and confused by the entire situation and is trying to be there (as she physically just was) but doesn't have the maturity and coping skills to handle it. I expect, at your age and with your diagnosis, ... (read in full...)
Does anyone have any advice for me until my doctor clears me?
Q. I was raped two years ago, and the guy gave me HPV. I have been cleared of the virus, but I still have cancer cells that my doctor is trying to remove. He just performed a procedure where the cells were frozen. He has instructed me not to have sex ...
A. 29 June 2011: If you are blaming yourself for your assault or the aftermath of the assault, that would indicate to me that you might need some additional counseling and support. Please call the center that helped you cope with the aftermath of the rape for some ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is becoming more and more distant, does she still love me? Does she not want to be with me because of my illness?
Q. Hello everyone Thank you for takeing the time to read this. A lot has happend these last few months, i got diognosed with skitophenia (sorry still cant spell it) lost my viginity with my girlfreind. Been hospitalised three times for epi...
A. 29 June 2011: So you are hospitalized with schizophrenia, you were sexually assaulted last week, and the hospital allows a girlfriend to come in and have sex with you?... (read in full...)
Do you think that my teacher had deep feelings for me? Or some form of emotional connection?
Q. Hi there, Good God do I know you have all been asked this question millions of times. I know I should take my own advice and read the answers you have all written to similar questions to mine, but I guess it feels more personal when you reply t...
A. 29 June 2011: My guess is that he saw you as a lovely young woman with a lot of promise and supported your successes and smiled when you were shining (getting an award or dancing). He liked you as that, a student in his care. But then you were staring at him a lo... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is becoming more and more distant, does she still love me? Does she not want to be with me because of my illness?
Q. Hello everyone Thank you for takeing the time to read this. A lot has happend these last few months, i got diognosed with skitophenia (sorry still cant spell it) lost my viginity with my girlfreind. Been hospitalised three times for epi...
A. 29 June 2011: What did you talk about with your girlfriend when she came to visit? What did she say and what did you say?... (read in full...)
What's the deal with guys and big boobs?
Q. What is it about big boobs that guys like so much? I have small breasts, small waist and a big, round butt! My friends tell me I have a great body and that I should be proud, but there's something I don't get. I don't seem to receive that much ...
A. 29 June 2011: And just one more thought. The guys in clubs who are buying drinks and hitting on the girls often are hoping for a nice quick sexual encounter; they probably aren't likely to spend money and energy on someone who isn't going to oblige with sexual ... (read in full...)
What's the deal with guys and big boobs?
Q. What is it about big boobs that guys like so much? I have small breasts, small waist and a big, round butt! My friends tell me I have a great body and that I should be proud, but there's something I don't get. I don't seem to receive that much ...
A. 29 June 2011: Why don't you test your theory by putting on a pair of fake boobs in a bra and see what happens the next time you go out?
But the first thing that came to my mind is, who cares what a bunch of drunken guys in a club think is hot? They're not the ... (read in full...)
Are men responsible or women for the fact that women don't look inside themselves for true integrity anymore?
Q. I want some female feedback. I see a lot of women freaking out about their guys interest in porn. I like porn. And if i had a partner I'm sure she would hate it as I would if she liked porn. I tend to like soft porn and i don't get an erection. I ...
A. 28 June 2011: What you're saying is that you wouldn't date the female equivalent of yourself. Ah.
So this is less about 'female integrity' (which still hasn't been defined by you) and more about your own insecurity/discomfort/conflict with the thought that a woma... (read in full...)
What would be your interpretation of this man and the possible motivations behind this behavior?
Q. I have a good one that I found flipping through the various internet pages. In fact it is a context to a story I had read but yet poses some interesting fodder for all of you aunts if you would kindly oblige. What would be your intereptetation ...
A. 27 June 2011: He sounds like a guy who likes to nurture, who may like to find people who are vulnerable in some way, then supply the missing tenderness in those lives.... (read in full...)
Do I deserve the same second chance I gave her?
Q. I have been dating a girl for 21 months. Back in November, I found out by looking in her laptop that she had been talking inappropriately to other guys. That hurt me a lot and I forgave and forgot so we could move on after she apologized. Now, ...
A. 27 June 2011: Tell us how you reacted to her online flirting. How did you confront her about it? What did you say? How did you say it? Did you promise that you would never in a million years do that to her?
I'd say not enough information but I think it's not soun... (read in full...)
I really want to get pregnant -- should I?
Q. I want to get pregnant but I know I'm young... I'll be 17 in two months and I've been in this relationship for almost three years. My boyfriend is in the Navy and I love him very very much. We've had a miscariage and it hurt both of us very badly...
A. 27 June 2011: Ah, you are worried for his safety. Believe me, I know how that can feel. Several family members were deployed, in harm's way, and it is absolutely gut-wrenching to worry. They too, had to put their life-plans on hold. No babies born then! But now ... (read in full...)
Are men responsible or women for the fact that women don't look inside themselves for true integrity anymore?
Q. I want some female feedback. I see a lot of women freaking out about their guys interest in porn. I like porn. And if i had a partner I'm sure she would hate it as I would if she liked porn. I tend to like soft porn and i don't get an erection. I ...
A. 27 June 2011: I missed the memo that said all women everywhere no longer were able to live lives of integrity without outside help. Hm.
Well, I guess if that old saw is true, that behind every great man is a great woman, then alas, all men are screwed. All hete... (read in full...)
I want to lose weight but not become too thin. Any advice?
Q. Sooo this isn't really a relationship question, but I just need some advice. I'm 5'3, I use to weigh 5 stone. I went to hospital and put on 4 stone, the medication I was on had a side affect of weight gain. Since then I've lost 1 stone; so I now ...
A. 25 June 2011: I agree with CindyCares that you are proposing to go to a dangerously low weight. Please seek help from your physician and do not risk your health and well-being for some magical number on a scale. What size you wear matters so much less than if ... (read in full...)
Genital warts and sex
Q. if you have gential warts and you have sex with your partner with a condom. will he catch the std to even if the warts are gone ?...
A. 25 June 2011: Apparently, there is still a risk of transmission even with a condom. http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/stds-hiv-safer-sex/hpv-4272.htm
You should nevertheless continue to use condoms for intercourse or oral sex on him or dental dams... (read in full...)
Somebody is 'planting' panties
Q. My wife recently discovered a pair of panties which were obviously planted by (we suspect) during a recent visit by an envious/jealous guests (younger adult neice). Luckily, my wife knows I had nothing to do with the matter. Any suggestions on how ...
A. 25 June 2011: Are you certain it was an intentional action, designed to cause you some embarrassment, or a rift in your marriage? I'd just put them in an ordinary envelope, mail them back to her with a little note signed by both of you. "Thanks for visiting us!... (read in full...)
I just found out the guy my wife lost her viginity to had a bigger penis
Q. hi just found out the guy my wife lost her virginty to was my 2nd cousin after 22 years of married life when she blurted out his name by mistake i asked her his name and found out he had a bigger penis and said she was sorry had i known this i would ...
A. 24 June 2011: What is it that troubles you here? Is it she wasn't a virgin when she married you? Is it that he had a larger penis that you? Or is it that it was a 'cousin'?
Thanks for clarifying.... (read in full...)
I really want to get pregnant -- should I?
Q. I want to get pregnant but I know I'm young... I'll be 17 in two months and I've been in this relationship for almost three years. My boyfriend is in the Navy and I love him very very much. We've had a miscariage and it hurt both of us very badly...
A. 24 June 2011: Isn't this more about you missing him and less about you being ready to parent?
You are 16 years old. I don't know that many teen mothers, but the ones I have met don't really have an easy time of it. I know that many children born to teens moth... (read in full...)
Is it safe to have anal without a condom?
Q. Hey, me and my girlfriend are planning to have anal, without condom, first time for us, both virgins, still any chance in getting disease?...
A. 24 June 2011: One risk would be that you get a urinary tract infection from the fecal bacteria in her anus. The bacteria could potentially make their way up your urethra to your bladder.
http://www.webmd.com/sex/anal-sex-health-concerns
http:... (read in full...)
How do I get over knowing he doesn't care that the relationship is over?
Q. Hellllo, Yesterday i decided to break up with my boyfriend of 4 years,because he was lying and cheating and i finally got fed up and i was to hurt this time to try anymore. So i dont really know what to do anymore,im really confused and my ...
A. 24 June 2011: You will feel better when you realize that your value is not determined by HIM, it is determined by YOU. If you think that the highest value you can reach is to be cherished and loved by HIM, then you have a very low opinion of yourself.
Right now,... (read in full...)
How can I forget my ex?
Q. how can i forget my past relationship?...even if i love him so much?..can you give me some ways?...
A. 24 June 2011: I like this one too: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-to-get-over-your-ex.html
Research the grief process, you'll see what you are experiencing is normal. If you are having trouble coping, get support from friends and family; they can be a sour... (read in full...)
How should I handle my boyfriend's issues with sex and intimacy?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 17 months. We are perfect together - we dont argue, we laugh together, enjoy the same things etc. we live in our own places but plan to move in together at the start of next year. There is just ...
A. 24 June 2011: Ah, how do you get past this? The short answer is that you don't.
What you have now is pretty much what you can expect for the next 5, 10, 20 years. If you want more than this in terms of sexual intimacy, then you need to consider changing boyf... (read in full...)
How do I get over a 4 year love affair?
Q. I am so glad I came across this site. I need some suggestions on how to get over my lover. I am a married woman with no children and I have been having an affair with a married man for 4 years. His wife has just found out due to some old emails a...
A. 23 June 2011: Quickly! Who is your primary guy?
Who do you want to grow old with?
EEEHHHHGGGGNNNKKKKK.
That's all the time you have.
Him or him.
Pick!
Quickly!... (read in full...)
Not in love with wife, but lover says she wants to have child with her boyfriend, and no longer wants sex!
Q. I am in quite a complicated relationship, let me explain: 1. I am a married man, no kids 2. In a relationship with a woman 7 years older to me who is living with another man. 3. We work toghether, earlier in the same team now in different teams...
A. 23 June 2011: I am in quite a complicated relationship, let me explain:
1. I am a married man, no kids
[So you said vows to your wife?]
2. In a relationship with a woman 7 years older to me who is living with another man.
[So you are alas, man number 2, ... (read in full...)
Not in love with wife, but lover says she wants to have child with her boyfriend, and no longer wants sex!
Q. I am in quite a complicated relationship, let me explain: 1. I am a married man, no kids 2. In a relationship with a woman 7 years older to me who is living with another man. 3. We work toghether, earlier in the same team now in different teams...
A. 22 June 2011: "I once told her I am willing to leave my wife for her, but she said it does not make sense (we are from different nationalities), and she feels that this is better for both of us."
You're just sitting on the fence. If you want to be with her, then... (read in full...)
How do I get over a 4 year love affair?
Q. I am so glad I came across this site. I need some suggestions on how to get over my lover. I am a married woman with no children and I have been having an affair with a married man for 4 years. His wife has just found out due to some old emails a...
A. 22 June 2011: I would think that staying in a marriage that is so unfulfilling and unhappy is worse for you than the break up of the affair.
I have friends who are struggling in their marriages but the infidelity generally seems to be be the point of no retu... (read in full...)
I want to keep the baby but he wants an abortion!
Q. Hello readers... I've recently found out that I am pregnant. I'm thrilled but really hurt at the same time. The father on the other hand is upset and want me to have an abortion. BIG PROBLEM, because I don't want to. I just don't understand how he ...
A. 22 June 2011: Just to add, for the future of the child, you may wish to consult an attorney to ensure the child is financially supported by the father. Someone who doesn't wear a condom is pretty much planning (through omission, or is it emission?) to be a ... (read in full...)
Should I try and resolve this, try and save our relationship?
Q. Right, I'm asking this out of desperation. My relationship is falling apart. I'm sixteen and I've been with my boyfriend for a year and 3 months, and suddenly things are crumbling and changing so fast. I don't know what to do. Things are really ...
A. 22 June 2011: One more thought, line up all your best girlfriends to support you if things go pear-shaped! Tell them what you are planning to do and ask that they be there for you! That will help you feel better and you'll know you aren't completely alone.
W... (read in full...)
On our second date, I almost had an accident while driving her home. Did that scare her off or am I overreacting?
Q. I started talking to this girl online and after a couple of weeks she gave me her number and wanted me to add her on facebook. For a little while after that we texted just about everyday and started talking about making plans to hang out. We finally ...
A. 22 June 2011: Just to add, one of my friends threw up in her date's car on their first date. They got married a few years later. You can have a disaster and it can be something funny to talk about later!
Ask her out, like on a real date!... (read in full...)
Should I try and resolve this, try and save our relationship?
Q. Right, I'm asking this out of desperation. My relationship is falling apart. I'm sixteen and I've been with my boyfriend for a year and 3 months, and suddenly things are crumbling and changing so fast. I don't know what to do. Things are really ...
A. 22 June 2011: At a certain point, you will find that being brave and doing what seems to be the difficult thing is actually what is best for yourself and for the relationship, however that turns out.
In other words, tell him that you feel things are falling apar... (read in full...)
On our second date, I almost had an accident while driving her home. Did that scare her off or am I overreacting?
Q. I started talking to this girl online and after a couple of weeks she gave me her number and wanted me to add her on facebook. For a little while after that we texted just about everyday and started talking about making plans to hang out. We finally ...
A. 22 June 2011: Ask her out. If you like her, ask her out on a date. The rest, you are overthinking.
Right now, she's probably wondering why you haven't asked her out. Some rather lame text from you and that was it. She can't be feeling good about how you have... (read in full...)
How do I get over a 4 year love affair?
Q. I am so glad I came across this site. I need some suggestions on how to get over my lover. I am a married woman with no children and I have been having an affair with a married man for 4 years. His wife has just found out due to some old emails a...
A. 22 June 2011: Part of the problem, of course, is that you can't tell anyone what your sorrow is. Ah, well, you must have known that this day would come eventually. Now you face that reality.
Recognize that you are going through the typical stages of grief foll... (read in full...)
He expects me to wait until he is back from the pub to cook his dinner!
Q. My boyfriend has recently started to go to the pub every Friday after work with his new work colleagues. I wait until he gets home from work all week before I start cooking dinner. He can get home after 6pm and he likes to chill out for a bit before ...
A. 22 June 2011: Men have a rich fantasy life. Besides the obvious sexual fantasies, they also dream about what their ideal home situation looks like. I would guess his fantasy is that he comes home and you squeal in joy and then wait on him. Home-cooked meals carry ... (read in full...)
Confusing crush....is he interested?
Q. Hey guys , I need some help understanding my crush . I haven't known him very long but I'm very keen on him and feel there is some sort of connection .. Thing is I didn't know he had a girlfriend because he never spoke about being taken so I fell ...
A. 22 June 2011: He's definitely not as interested in you as you are in him. He's not jumping in to ask you out, so maybe now would be a good time to back off and give him a chance to miss you a bit.
If he likes you, he'll try to close that gap. If it was a roug... (read in full...)
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