Like what
she writes?
... Add *isha-1 to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *isha-1 a private message | | | *isha-1's profile:Hi there!
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal.
I heard this quote recently: ""The truth is like castor oil. It’s difficult to take and hard to swallow, so we get them to laugh and while their mouths are open, we pour a little in." -Harold Clurman
If you have an urgent question, please post it on the main page. Real life keeps me busy and has enough going on to keep me from being on here 24/7.... I hope yours does too! ;)
Current book recommendation: Untethered Soul, by Michael Singer. A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. The Power of Now, also by Eckhart Tolle. Really powerful stuff in there about not letting your runaway thoughts take over your life. Be present in the Now. You have what you need, right there, right inside yourself. Do yourself a HUGE favor and read these books. They may lead to an important and fundamental shift in your well-being. "Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are cause by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence." --Eckhart Tolle
All time fave relationship figure out book: A Fine Romance, Judith Sills, PhD. Buy if you are stuck and can't figure out why he won't commit, or why you keep picking guys who can't commit.
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck." -The Dalai Lama
"Most people are doing the best they can, given what they know and understand. Including you. If they knew more and were aware of more, they would do things differently." -- Louise Hay
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything." -Mark Twain
I like these links right now: http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-4593/A-Simple-Way-to-Let-Go-of-Our-Negative-Patterns.html
http://www.positivelypositive.com/2012/04/04/25-life-lessons/
So here's the thing. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not a sign of weakness. Weakness is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different outcome. Actually, according to Albert Einstein, that's the definition of insanity but I think that's a bit of a strong word choice.
“Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.” -The Dalai Lama.
The choices you make may affect others. Think about the consequences, intended or unintended, before you do something that you may have to explain later. Imagine you are standing in front of a group of people and have to defend what you chose to do.... if you can't manage to do it well, that's a fairly plain indicator it's a bad idea.
If everyone who loves you hates your partner, there might be a problem. If you only have your partner, there IS a problem.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-8202/12-signs-youre-in-a-toxic-relationship.html
If he’s mean to you now, he’s only going to get worse. Some people are energy vampires; they feed on the pain they inflict on others. They are broken. They will break you. Get out. Don’t fool yourself into thinking you can fix him. You can’t.
You have my permission to say “no.”
If you are depressed, think of it like an illness. You have to treat it. Medicine can help. Talk to your doctor. If you’re drinking a lot, you’re already self-medicating. You might as well get some prescription-grade pharmaceuticals to help you get to a point where you can figure out why you’re self-medicating.
There’s a reason it’s called ‘junk food.’
Yoga is good for the body and the mind as well as soothing the spirit. Try it. Brisk walks are great too.
Don't eat crap. Canned sugary beverages or canned diet beverages are NOT good for you, they have no nutritional value and set you up for a lot of bad stuff. Don't drink them. Water is good. Decide if you can tolerate coffee or tea (I love them both) and then drink those in moderation.
Life is nasty, cold, brutal, unfair, and crappy. It’s also amazing, beautiful, uplifting, awe-inspiring and fun. You choose how you’re going to approach it every day.
I have a few soapboxes that I tend to haul out: I don't like to see people put their health or future at risk and I REALLY don't like to see them put other's health or future at risk. I feel strongly that not providing good sex education or keeping sex education from children is a form of child abuse. It's like sending them out into the world not knowing how to buckle a seatbelt.
I love this video from plannedparenthood.org (How Pregnancy Happens): http://websrvr40nj.audiovideoweb.com/avwebdsnjwebsrvr4501/portal/media/media-050516-pregnancy.html
More good information from plannedparenthood.org on the various methods of birth control:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control//birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
I don't have any expertise in abusive relationships, but I do think there are some common sense basics that people who are in one might be missing. Find out more here: http://www.mental-health-matters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=171
Be brave, Tell the truth. Be kind. If you can do that all in the same sentence, you will be an amazing agony aunt. Sign up. I'm still trying to reach that ideal. |
|
| Latest articles: Questions to ask before getting married!
No replies yet... 24 March 2016: I just read a great article in the New York Times online. "13 Questions to Ask Before Getting Married” It was written by Eleanor Stanford and posted March 24, 2016. http://www.nytimes.com...
Need Christmas or other holiday gift ideas? Look here!
No replies yet... 3 December 2013: Every year, DearCupid sees an influx of questions asking "What should I get for my boyfriend/girlfriend/significant person? Help!" This question has been asked so many times, we suggest our posters use the search feature of the site here: ...
A little primer on women and sex...
This question has 29 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 November 2011: A Primer on Women and Sex Look, we girls are funny. We don't sexually mature all overnight, our first sexual experiences are often painful, crappy and frankly unfulfilling on many levels. We don't know how to give blowjobs, most of us don't grow up ...
Valentine's Day Gift Ideas
This question has 6 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
26 January 2011: Each year, we here at DearCupid see many submissions asking, "What should I get my boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband/lover/partner for Valentine's Day?" I think it would be great to consolidate these questions and some ideas into one place, so I've ...
Retrograde jealousy
This question has 102 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
25 July 2010: DearCupid sees many stories about men and women who find out after they are married that their partners have more sexual experience or partners than was initially understood. It is a very real problem for the one who is devastated to discover the ...
Advice to young men about young women
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
1 May 2008: I posted this as an answer to a young man, a virgin, who wanted to know about his young girlfriend, also a virgin... First, I know it's hard to believe but a girl her age may not know her body very well. She may not know what is sexually stimula...
More than one way to get up the Duff!!
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 March 2008: Some us ‘Aunts’ have been entertaining ourselves with fundamental questions about various ways pregnancy occurs…. I remembered that there were strange stories surrounding the births of some of the gods and goddesses of ancient myth, and I had a ...
|
Shall I initiate another 'where is this going conversation' and if he is not budging then accept that the relationship has no future and split with him or do I wait until he brings it up?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm 28 and in an intercultural, inter-racial relationship with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. He is Egyptian muslim (33 years old) and I am white British liberal muslim. We're both doctors. I've not met his siblings (2 sisters) except ...
A. 16 February 2012: YOU decide where you go from here, and that to me seems to be right out the door and on to a new chapter in your life. You've put yourself on the shelf for a guy who can never be what you want in a partner. You are suffering because you choose to ... (read in full...)
Shall I initiate another 'where is this going conversation' and if he is not budging then accept that the relationship has no future and split with him or do I wait until he brings it up?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm 28 and in an intercultural, inter-racial relationship with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. He is Egyptian muslim (33 years old) and I am white British liberal muslim. We're both doctors. I've not met his siblings (2 sisters) except ...
A. 23 December 2011: I was just wondering how things went for you! Thanks for the follow up!
... (read in full...)
I've been hoping we'd lead to marriage but haven't seen him since 2008!
Q. I am in a Long distance relationship. I met someone back in 2007 he was here on contract from the states and we worked in the same department for a yr, anyways cut short we started dating and he went back and i promised him i would come to th...
A. 26 October 2011: I'm not surprised the date wasn't a romantic success, you're just figuring out how to navigate a world without the "relationship" you'd tended over the past few years. You've invested a lot of energy, wishful thinking and built hopes on a flimsy ... (read in full...)
Why are so many people homophobic? Is it fair to hate someone for something which they have no control?
Q. I was at work today and two male coworkers came in to install new lights. I was alone. I'm a lesbian and i haven't disclosed that to anyone at my job. And I look very feminine. These guys also think I have a boyfriend, I guess bc an attractive smart ...
A. 5 October 2011: As far as shutting off their comments, which is also important, just say, as part of establishing the boundaries: "I'm sorry, I don't like to engage in bashing people for their race, sex, creed or sexual orientation. Please do not make comments of ... (read in full...)
Why are so many people homophobic? Is it fair to hate someone for something which they have no control?
Q. I was at work today and two male coworkers came in to install new lights. I was alone. I'm a lesbian and i haven't disclosed that to anyone at my job. And I look very feminine. These guys also think I have a boyfriend, I guess bc an attractive smart ...
A. 5 October 2011: I think you need to establish some clear boundaries with these guys. You may need to get Human Resources involved to help with this.
First of all, they should not be hugging or caressing you at all if it has a sexual context, which it sounds it does... (read in full...)
I'm 13, and I want to kiss my teacher!
Q. I have a huge crush on my form teacher and no one knows but every day when I come in to form I get more and more desperate to kiss him. I dont know how to do it though, or to do it at all. Also i really want to tell my friend but i am also worried ...
A. 5 October 2011: I found a post for you to read: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/a-student-is-in-love-with-me-how.html
Any behaviour like this from you is going to be taken by him as seriously out-of-bounds, over-the-top, ridiculous teen girl fantasies. He coul... (read in full...)
Burning and cutting down below. allergic to semen? help!
Q. i am absolutely fed up. i always get a burning, splintering, cutting sensation during sex and after my boyfriend has ejaculated. it is worse after ejaculation and so unbearable i cry. my whole vagina swells and goes red and puffy. ive been to ...
A. 4 October 2011: The doctor said you were allergic to trauma? And so what treatment or drug or anti-allergy approach did he tell you to try? If all he said is, 'you're allergic to trauma, NEXT patient, please' you have to get back in there and ask for proper help.
W... (read in full...)
I knew my teacher liked me...now he's at another school should I email him?
Q. So last year I was a junior and there was a certain English teacher/coach I has a crush on. I didnt have him as a teacher because he taught freshman english.He's a very young teacher not much of an age difference. Well last year He had overheard my ...
A. 3 October 2011: He may have been threatened with losing his job. Do not send an email to his school email address, that is not private and he may suffer some serious career consequences if your email is read by someone else.
If you have a personal email addr... (read in full...)
I'm 13 weeks pregnant but still have signs of blood when I use the bathrrom
Q. im 13 weeks pregnent and when i go to toilet ( number 2) i always have blood when i wipe myself or in the toilet sumtimes its lots other times its not but never strong enought to go onto my underwear Whats wrong with me ??????...
A. 29 September 2011: Please consult your doctor right away. Medical advice from strangers with no training is just not a good idea. ... (read in full...)
I've been waiting for 2 and a half years for my boyfriend to talk to me! Is he worth it?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been going out for 5 years and a month. (Since I was 12, and now I'm 17.) After 2 and a half years together, he moved across the US from me. Before he left, everything in our relationship was GREAT! He was the perfect ...
A. 29 September 2011: I sincerely hope you haven't put your life on hold for him. He's not your boyfriend. He is your EX-boyfriend and it's time you absorb this fact, okay?
It doesn't get much more weird than this story, really, he is not worth waiting one day long... (read in full...)
She saved herself for marriage, but we went too far! She's been crying for days!
Q. I was an arse. I've been with this woman for a year and she has been saving herself for marriage. Last week, she asked me to let her experience only a bit of myself and I impulsively took her. She hasn't stopped crying for days. She says she lov...
A. 29 September 2011: Ask her to marry you, if you planned to do it anyway. She now thinks you are a user, so prove to her that you are not.
Grovel. Apologize. Grovel some more. ... (read in full...)
I used her laptop to watch porn, and now she's mad at me. I don't understand the fuss!
Q. Hey there, I got in somewhat of a shocking fight today with my girlfriend, let me explain. First of all she found out that Ive watched porn on her laptop in her house when she was in class. That day I woke up and she was already at class, I ...
A. 28 September 2011: She felt it was disrespectful because she's at class, working hard and you're using HER laptop to 'relieve stress'. You lack empathy, I see, if you cannot see this from her perspective.
Let's say you were at work, working hard with no break. She ... (read in full...)
My paramour told my husband that he used me for sex. I am now trying to rebuild my marriage but how can I get over the pain of this affair?
Q. My affair ended 7 weeks ago when my husband caught me out. I have been married for 25 years,my marraige had been going through a very bad patch for about 3 years and i decided to attend an evening class where this guy was the teacher. At first we...
A. 28 September 2011: Did you ever have counseling? It sounds as though you did not. Perhaps it would have been money well spent back then. As you did not, and seem to be stuck in a negative thought pattern, perhaps it's a sign you should spend the money and time now.... (read in full...)
Can I delete him off facebook? I don't want to know what he's up to!
Q. My ex dumped me a week and a half ago. We had a 1 year relationship. Its been very hard for me, but he is completely fine. He feels nothing about the break up and has moved on. I have to see my ex every day as we go to uni together and are in the ...
A. 28 September 2011: You have our permission to dump him from facebook. It may be very hard for him, but you will be fine.
Seriously, go ahead and unfriend him. He'll live, so will you. Good luck!... (read in full...)
What should I do to fix this!!! please help me...seriously
Q. I met this guy and we dated for 2 months. It was going great. He introduce me to his friends and family whihc he has not done with a girl for 4 years. we got along very well and he was really good with my son. We ended up having a lil spat which put ...
A. 28 September 2011: What was the 'lil' spat that put you on break? You were only together 2 months, so it much have been bigger than a 'lil' spat?
And when he said you 'freaked him out,' what did he mean by that?
Thanks!... (read in full...)
Is it a good idea to get pregnant, aged 16?
Q. im 16 and me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 months we've been sexually active for 2 months straight and well he has told me he wants to have a baby. i dont really want to have a baby right now because im going through some legal problems ...
A. 28 September 2011: Can you explain, precisely, what makes it a good idea? Because what you have presented is rather the opposite of a great start for a healthy happy baby.... (read in full...)
I've been hoping we'd lead to marriage but haven't seen him since 2008!
Q. I am in a Long distance relationship. I met someone back in 2007 he was here on contract from the states and we worked in the same department for a yr, anyways cut short we started dating and he went back and i promised him i would come to th...
A. 27 September 2011: I think you wanting it to work out is perfectly natural and normal--it's wonderful to find a guy you click with and want to be with. I think that this kind of thing can creep up on us, I mean, you didn't go into this thinking that you wouldn't see ... (read in full...)
Am I being irrational?
Q. Do good guys get what they deserve? I don't really understand why girls at my age do not appreciate the things that good guys done for them and in my case she thinks I am obsessed with her. I love her but not obsessed with her. Sometimes is rea...
A. 27 September 2011: "She never blame herself for betraying the trust I have put in her." She didn't ask you to put your trust in her, you decided to do that yourself.
Based on your past posts, you ARE obsessed with her. You've made all sorts of life decisions base... (read in full...)
Is it normal to feel bad after a threesome?
Q. Hey guys, quick question, is it normal that a person feels disgusted with themselves after a three way? Lately it's like I feel like I'm close to tears and I can't stop thinking about it. ...
A. 27 September 2011: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/does-him-getting-in-a-huff-about-me.html
So who did you have a threesome with, exactly? Your ex, your FWB or a new guy altogether?
I think your plan is a little silly, really. If you don't have trust and communic... (read in full...)
Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all... But if I never loved I would have never lost. and would not feel the this way..
Q. My ex girlfriend and i love each other alot. Im not putting words in her mouth she has told me that she loves me even tho we are broken up. Its my fault why we broke up. I was drunk and went online and sexted another girl. I honestly didnt know what ...
A. 27 September 2011: "First, My girlfriend past is, well ****ed up. I am her third boyfriend and every boyfriend before me cheated on her. Her Dad also cheated on her Mom for 5 years with her moms best friend! Cheating is not something that's okay and not something that ... (read in full...)
Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all... But if I never loved I would have never lost. and would not feel the this way..
Q. My ex girlfriend and i love each other alot. Im not putting words in her mouth she has told me that she loves me even tho we are broken up. Its my fault why we broke up. I was drunk and went online and sexted another girl. I honestly didnt know what ...
A. 27 September 2011: You're being self-centered, and perhaps it's a typical immaturity due to age or perhaps it's going to be a life-long thing.
You're posted about this before, you admit to the sexting, your ex has issues with previous bfs cheating on her, you want... (read in full...)
Why would he suddenly make his facebook photos public?
Q. A guy removed me as a friend from his facebook list because he wanted no regrets and didn't want me to know about his actions. I got a really amazing makeover in the upcoming year. I know I shouldn't be searching him but ... I did. Anyway, he has e...
A. 27 September 2011: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/so-are-his-little-postings-on-facebook-about.html
Now that I've read this, I think he's thumbing his nose at you and saying "nyah nyah nyah good riddance bye bye don't call me I'll call you but don't hold your brea... (read in full...)
Why is it that when I have a chance to lose my virginity, I can't perform!
Q. um so heres my problem. i am 16 years old, and a virgin. that isnt exactly the issue, but what is is that on a number of occasions in the past few years i have had the chance to have sex, and it just hasnt worked out. with the first girl we both ...
A. 27 September 2011: I think your body is telling you it's not ready. I think it's probably a good idea to respect that. I think also that you're confusing viewing images and achieving an erection with being emotionally ready for sex. In other words, just because you ... (read in full...)
How can I control my obsessive actions?
Q. Hi I'm 22 years old and ever since I was 15 I have had sevral unhealthy obsessions with individuals one of them got so out of control I was threatend that the police would be involved. I'm now recently obsessed with my ex boss during his leaving ...
A. 27 September 2011: Get rid of your phone and lose his number. If you have uncontrollable urges and obsessive thoughts you need professional help. Talk to your doctor about how to control these behaviors and actions.
If you've been having this problem for 7 years with... (read in full...)
So are his little postings on facebook about me?
Q. Hi, So I just wanted to ask if these are all coincidences or not. A guy and I got into a misunderstanding and based on 1)he thought I was into his friend at the same time and 2)he was really a party boy all his life and I don't think he had mu...
A. 27 September 2011: So the key points are that
-he blocked you
-you stalked him with a fake account
-he knows that you stalked him with a fake account
-he continues to block you
So his feelings toward you are that he has blocked you from his life. You are stalki... (read in full...)
Shall I initiate another 'where is this going conversation' and if he is not budging then accept that the relationship has no future and split with him or do I wait until he brings it up?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm 28 and in an intercultural, inter-racial relationship with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. He is Egyptian muslim (33 years old) and I am white British liberal muslim. We're both doctors. I've not met his siblings (2 sisters) except ...
A. 27 September 2011: This strategy that I've laid out will address this comment he made: He told me that men do not like to discuss things, they just decide and move on whereas girls like to discuss every last detail.
So stop discussing (he's not listening, he hear... (read in full...)
Shall I initiate another 'where is this going conversation' and if he is not budging then accept that the relationship has no future and split with him or do I wait until he brings it up?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm 28 and in an intercultural, inter-racial relationship with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. He is Egyptian muslim (33 years old) and I am white British liberal muslim. We're both doctors. I've not met his siblings (2 sisters) except ...
A. 27 September 2011: Re-reading the post, I'd tell him that you expect to meet his mother by the end of October. If this doesn't happen, then break up with him. Make it clear this is IT, then sit back and wait to see if he makes it happen. If he does nothing and you ... (read in full...)
Shall I initiate another 'where is this going conversation' and if he is not budging then accept that the relationship has no future and split with him or do I wait until he brings it up?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm 28 and in an intercultural, inter-racial relationship with my boyfriend of 2.5 years. He is Egyptian muslim (33 years old) and I am white British liberal muslim. We're both doctors. I've not met his siblings (2 sisters) except ...
A. 27 September 2011: Hi there, I read your followup and had to chime in (late) to the discussion. First of all, I have met many international couples, they do work, IF there's a willingness and openness on both sides.
I think after 2 1/2 years together, he knows if h... (read in full...)
Husband has cancer but cheated on me when I was asleep nxt door with his kids
Q. well hello everyone i dont know were to start and i have never postd before i just dont know what to do, im a mother of 5 ages 11 ,7,3,2 and 8month old baby me and my husband have been togeather 16 years and we have had our problems alot actually ...
A. 26 September 2011: I'm sorry that you are in this situation. It sounds as though there are services available to you, if you are willing to go. If you have no money and nowhere to stay and 5 children to feed, but he has a place to stay and money, then clearly you ARE ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend had a drunken fling and now the guy won't leave us alone
Q. Long story short my gf has broken up with me and had drunken sex with a guy she barely knew She says sex with him was amazing and he was way "bigger" than me I hate that fact but she says I shouldn't worry that he meant nothing and it only happened...
A. 26 September 2011: She's your ex, with some very deep and creative insults for you. A fairly clear signal that you are not the guy for her. I think at this point it would be a good idea to let her deal with this 'problem' person. She can block the phone, tell her ... (read in full...)
Will she ever want or like sex?
Q. Mainly want female answers. How normal is it for a girl to just not like any sexual things at all? My girlfriend says she hates the feeling of sex and anything to do with it, she is not a virgin (I am) but she just simply hates it, she has never ...
A. 26 September 2011: She hates sex, hates the thought of it, doesn't masturbate nor has ever had an orgasm. Lost her virginity to a guy who made her afraid of not having sex with him.
These are not good signs, they really aren't normal nor do they point to good pros... (read in full...)
I've been hoping we'd lead to marriage but haven't seen him since 2008!
Q. I am in a Long distance relationship. I met someone back in 2007 he was here on contract from the states and we worked in the same department for a yr, anyways cut short we started dating and he went back and i promised him i would come to th...
A. 26 September 2011: I mean is it really difficult for Americans to visit the UK?
It's expensive but....
"I did not ask you to wait for me all those years and i didn't make any promises"! i was shocked and hurt and i feel horrible what was all this then?. I feel if ... (read in full...)
Can you lose your virginity from too much porn?
Q. if u watch too much porn and have a little blood coming out from downtheir what does it mean? can you loose your virginity by seeing too much porn???...
A. 26 September 2011: Could it be that you simply started menstruating?... (read in full...)
I'm 13 and I have feelings for a 20 year old man
Q. So im 13 going to be 14 and there is this guy that i like but hes 20 and he knows that i like him and he says im not supposed to but i seriously like him i can't stop thinking about him. He always listens to my problems and try's to protect me. He ...
A. 26 September 2011: Your mom sounds like she has a good idea. Patience will show if he's the guy for you. Wait a few years and all will be clear.... (read in full...)
I'm 13, he's 18. Would it be ok to date him?
Q. i always feel a lot older than i am. me and this guy like each other and flirt a lot, and it might lead to a relationship but we're just seeing how things go as hes 18, im 13 and we don't want to rush into anything. i know it would be illegal to ...
A. 26 September 2011: I'd say spend time with him on family outings and when you are doing things with your parents, so he can demonstrate what kind of guy he is to your parents. At age 13, you have to be looked after by your parents, so if he's a genuine guy with no ... (read in full...)
Is my husband just joking when he says he wants threesomes?
Q. so i(23) been married to my husband(31) for 7 months now, when we went to a club and partied with friends, my husband (drunk) jokingly said "did you find someone to have a threesome with yet?" im like "haha no" ( im drunk ).. as he said that, i ...
A. 26 September 2011: "so tell me, does he realy want threesomes? is he stating that im a bore in bed, or just horrible? or am i missing somthing?"
Sounds like he's fantasizing about them. But you're making a leap if you think that means you are a bore in bed or horr... (read in full...)
She wants me to visit her in USA. She does not know I had a criminal record in the past which may prevent me getting a visa
Q. A month ago I got a letter from a female I met in Florida back in 2003. Truth be told,I have always wondered what could have been. I have been invited over. Her family are bending over backwards for me. My problem being,I have a criminal record. It ...
A. 26 September 2011: You haven't been in contact with her for 8 years and now they want you to stay for a long time? That sounds a bit, um, ambitious? Unrealistic also comes to mind. Don't you have commitments and limitations on your time?
Why not simply go visit for ... (read in full...)
Is it realistic for me to want to date a guy of a certain build when I know I'll never be that slender myself?
Q. so am so attracted to really tall thin lanky guys... not stick thin but like a naturally thin guy. Like an "Adam Levine", "John Mayer", "Jared Followill" type of thin looking guy. Thing is I am nowhere near thin. I have never been thin...wont ever ...
A. 25 September 2011: He can't help not being attracted to you, if you are not his physical type, just as you can't help not being attracted to bigger guys, who may like you but are not your physical type. You like what you like and if you aren't someone's physical ... (read in full...)
An employee is sending me texts asking me out to dinner, and this started on my second day!
Q. Alright... so this week I started my new job and I was just trying to get used to everyone and get to know the employees since I am the new supervisor. This one employee passed me a note that said "dinner?" while I was sitting at my desk and it ...
A. 25 September 2011: This guy is setting you up. I'd document the stalking, including his getting your number and take it to HR, right away. You're about to lose your "supervisor" credibility and with that, your job. Better document, document, and report, like, now.... (read in full...)
Husband has cancer but cheated on me when I was asleep nxt door with his kids
Q. well hello everyone i dont know were to start and i have never postd before i just dont know what to do, im a mother of 5 ages 11 ,7,3,2 and 8month old baby me and my husband have been togeather 16 years and we have had our problems alot actually ...
A. 25 September 2011: Call the hotline, please. They'll be able to refer you to local help, and posdibly an attorney who can protect your children's rights. Call, please.
Sorry to hear he's been so awful. Get practical, start planning, that might help you feel less help... (read in full...)
How do you change your entire personality?
Q. Hello, I myself am a really lonely individual, I don't have any girls that are friends guys that are friends, don't have any girlfriends. I think the problem is my personality. Here's what my personality is. I like doing dorky loser things like, ...
A. 25 September 2011: People who are interested in other people generally have more friends. My guess is that you are an introvert who finds it difficult to talk to people in a natural comfortable way.
Don't give up the passions that make you happy and keep you inte... (read in full...)
Why don't I feel butterflies anymore?
Q. What does it mean when you used to be lovesick about a guy all the time and got butterflies too,but then you start dating and it goes away? 3 I still like him but i just don't understand why that doesn't happen anymore. ...
A. 23 September 2011: The uncertainty and novelty are part of it as well. That goes away with intimacy and familiarity. I think it's atypical for a couple to experience butterflies whenever they see each other for the rest of their lives. So, for what it's worth, you are ... (read in full...)
Am I taking this too personally?
Q. My boyfriend and I are pretty solitary. We go out and do things, but generally just the two of us. One of our mutual friends was talking about Halloween parties and he really wanted to go, but he did not seem to even think of taking me with him ...
A. 23 September 2011: With my guy, I occasionally have to make it very clear that something is important to me. He usually gets it and will then remember, especially if the discussion is particularly memorable or I can get him to understand it from my side.
That bein... (read in full...)
Ex is stalking me and making me very uncomfortable!
Q. Okay, I confront her with proof about her stalking and she completely denied it. She went off on me about how she got better things to do with her time when she clearly did to it. She admitted it to someone as well a while back. All i asked ...
A. 23 September 2011: Who cares why a disturbed person does weird things? The basic thing is to block her stalking and if you have to, report her to someone. Okay?
Take some basic security and privacy precautions, maybe spend the hours you might be thinking about her ... (read in full...)
Why would he suddenly make his facebook photos public?
Q. A guy removed me as a friend from his facebook list because he wanted no regrets and didn't want me to know about his actions. I got a really amazing makeover in the upcoming year. I know I shouldn't be searching him but ... I did. Anyway, he has e...
A. 23 September 2011: I think person12345 probably hit on the reason: he wants to keep his employability and doesn't need party pictures out there for current or future employers to see.
Glad to hear you got a makeover, now use it to move on from him! Good luck!... (read in full...)
Ex is stalking me and making me very uncomfortable!
Q. Okay, I confront her with proof about her stalking and she completely denied it. She went off on me about how she got better things to do with her time when she clearly did to it. She admitted it to someone as well a while back. All i asked ...
A. 23 September 2011: Change all your passwords. Block her on all social network sites you may use. Reset your privacy to 'friends only' and make yourself invisible on searches on these networks so she cannot stalk you.
Check your computer to ensure she didn't inst... (read in full...)
Am I taking this too personally?
Q. My boyfriend and I are pretty solitary. We go out and do things, but generally just the two of us. One of our mutual friends was talking about Halloween parties and he really wanted to go, but he did not seem to even think of taking me with him ...
A. 23 September 2011: Why wouldn't you feel comfortable bringing this up with him?
"Babe, I know we are kind of loners, but I'd like to go to a party with your friends with you. I'm feeling a bit concerned and hurt that you didn't think to include me in your frie... (read in full...)
Husband has cancer but cheated on me when I was asleep nxt door with his kids
Q. well hello everyone i dont know were to start and i have never postd before i just dont know what to do, im a mother of 5 ages 11 ,7,3,2 and 8month old baby me and my husband have been togeather 16 years and we have had our problems alot actually ...
A. 23 September 2011: It sounds like you are in an abusive relationship with a guy who happens to have cancer. You've been 'thrown out' of the house you lived in with him? And are now struggling on your own to raise 5 children and try to help him?
Not to say this is the ... (read in full...)
| *isha-1's friends
These are mutual friends, so *isha-1 has
added them and they have added *isha-1!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
