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... Send *endyg a private message | | | *endyg's profile:I'm a 33 year old Business Analyst, in Hertfordshire.
I live in herts along with my Lovely Staffordshire bull terrier Archie and two lully cats! Rosie and Umbro!
Anyway, I stumbled across this site a couple of years back now and became addicted straight away! Anyway my friends used to always tell me that I gave good advice and I am a good listener.
I guess I try to put myself in other peoples situations and its easier looking in when your not directly involved. So anyway I gave this a shot, and here I am, I have had lots of positive feedback from people who have posted questions and I have done my best to advise, so I must be doing something right!
If I only make one person's life better with the advice I give then its worth it!
I like to make people happy and help if I can. I will go that extra mile if it will make someone smile!
x x
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I want to be a part of his life, but he scolded me for calling him...
Q. I love a guy who is 1 year older than me for 5 years. We were students at that time. Now I am still studying and he is working. Recently he faced a very big financial problem. He does not want to communicate with me. He said no meeting or love til...
A. 7 July 2005: I think you need to keep your distance for a while. Maybe contact him in a little while and see how things are going. Perhaps he feels pressured, but that isnt fair to you. Let him be for a while and then contact him telling him that you are still ... (read in full...)
My husband leave me unsatisfied and I don't want to let him know!
Q. I am 37 and have a very high sex drive that I am afraid to let my husband see because he takes advantage of me when it comes down to sex. Many time I'm left unsatisfied while he rolls over and falls asleep. I'm faced with a dilemma, don't get me ...
A. 4 July 2005: I really think the best thing to do is talk to him about it subtly. If you dont hes not to know there is a problem.. if this is the way it always been and you havent said anything then why would he suddenly change ? Let him know that you love him ... (read in full...)
When my friend has a crisis, I'm there for her, but now she seems to go out of her way to make me feel bad!
Q. My friends don't make me happy any more. Well not all of them, just one in particular, but most of them follow her. Her mum died 8 months ago and I was there for and supported her and recently I had an abortion and the day after I returned from hos...
A. 26 June 2005: It appears that she is jealous of what you have. I had a friend that was similar to this. At one point I would be there for her all the while and then when it came to me needing her she didnt want to know, purely and simply because it didnt make ... (read in full...)
Past girlfriends have cheated on me, so I can't believe this girl won't too!
Q. Hi everyone,I'm 20 and male. I have been with relationships since 15yrs of age and had not very much, this may sound shocking,but I find it hard to love again, since my first love, I was cheated. I'm not a guy to cheat, at all. But because of all t...
A. 24 June 2005: The thing you need to do is treat every new relationship as a blank canvas... this also should be done with freindships. How are you possibly going to move on happily if you are busy comparing what you have with the past. go into every new ... (read in full...)
Why am I jealous of my husband's time with his adult daughter?
Q. I have recently got married for the second time. We both have children, but my husband's are grown up. Except for his 18yr old daughter whom he is still very close with. I find it difficult to accept their close relationship as sometimes it has infr...
A. 22 June 2005: I think you should find the time to get to know her. Your husband had a grown up daughter and its only natural that he will want to spend time with her. He married you because he loves you. He lives with you... the least you can do is accept that ... (read in full...)
Involved with a married guy who says he sees himself divorced in the next 5 to 10 years...
Q. I'm having a affair with a married man for 2 months now. I'm in love with him, I'm also in a long term relationship but not married. I'm not sure if it will go anywhere. He's unhappy at home and tells me he's only staying there for his child. H...
A. 22 June 2005: you have only been seeing him for 2 months, and thats generally the time when all relationships are flowers and all things rosy in the garden... Lets see, do you really think it will stay like this for 5 to 10 years!? hardly.. he gave you that ... (read in full...)
Can a gay guy decide to be straight?
Q. I kissed a gay guy the other night while I was at a big rave. We were quite 'out of it' but hung out for hours and were kissing all night. He has a boyfried, but is in an open relationship and he told me that he has not been with a girl in three ...
A. 22 June 2005: Maybe he likes both sexes... Some people are like that, they can fancy someone and it doesnt matter to them what sex they are, if they fancy them they fancy them simple as that. Maybe he likes the attention from females from time to time.... ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting to my 47-year-old bf having cybersex with 18-year-old girls?
Q. My 47 year old boyfriend (I'm 48) is having cyber sex with 18 year olds. He and I recently just began living together about 6 weeks ago. He says it means nothing to him but could give no plausible answer as to why he's doing it. I told him someone ...
A. 22 June 2005: Engaging in chat with a girl of any age on the computer that amounts to cybersex, is a NO! why is he doing it ? He cant even tell you! Porn is one thing, but to actually engage in a conversation where sexual references are exchanged is a form of ... (read in full...)
I'm willing to go down on her, but she doesn't return the favour!
Q. My girlfriend and I have been going out for a few years now. I am more than willing to, and do, go down on her pretty often. The problem is that she refuses to give me head. I've tried talking to her about it, but she hasn't ever really given me an ...
A. 20 June 2005: Not all woman like giving head! Some find it a turn on others find it a turn off. Maybe suggest thigns like covering it in choclate or cream or something like that and get her to lick it off... tell her what would turn you on... when your together ... (read in full...)
My man loses his erection every time we try to have full sex!
Q. Question: involved an in love w wonderful man who is leaving his wife-everything between us perfect except sex...kissing, cuddling, etc all perfect-but he loses his erection each time we try to have full sex. He says it is emotional and I believe it ...
A. 20 June 2005: Im assuming his wifr doesnt know about you. this sounds as though he is feeling guilty and it comes out in this way. Hes been having sex with the same person for 25 years, and all of a sudden there is someone new. Perhaps he isnt ready to really ... (read in full...)
Freckles on my penis? What is it?
Q. I am a teenager, and lately i have started to develop freckles on my penis, and a smell has occured from it. I keep it clean enough and wash every day. I asked a mate and he said that it was because i wasnt masturbating enough, so i did it more ...
A. 17 June 2005: Now when you say freckles.. do you mean the type that are like moles ? if so it may just be normal or some kind of rash the best thing to do is to go along to the doctor and get it checked out. It could be something simple.. but without knowing ... (read in full...)
He won't give me up and he sleeps with someone else., too. Neither of us can say NO.
Q. Long love triangle. Was with ex for 18 yrs on/off. Split 3 yes ago drinking & cheating. Can't get over him. He now lives with g/f, not the one he cheated with. She's with one of his mates now as we (him & I) couldn't stay away from each other & ...
A. 17 June 2005: For all of your sakes one of you has to be strong enough to end it. The longer this goes on for the worse it will get. Why should this man have his cake and eat it... stay with you then with her when he picks and chooses... sounds like a real nice ... (read in full...)
Does Mum need to know I'm sleeping with my boyfriend?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 7 months and we've just recently started sleeping together. I am on the pill but haven't told my mum. I keep feeling guilty that i haven't told her, should I tell her?...
A. 16 June 2005: There isnt a rule that you should have to tell your mum that you are sleeping with someone unless you really want to. I hope that you are above the age of consent otherwise this could be a slightly more difficult. If you are serious with this guy ... (read in full...)
Why are my boyfriend's mates allowed to bring their girlfriend's, but I'm not invited?
Q. My boyfriend's birthday is Friday and I am going to eat with him and his parents and we are hanging out together that night. Saturday we are also hanging out, but that night, he is going to hang out with his friends for his birthday. OK, so that's ...
A. 15 June 2005: If he is prepared to single you out and let this go ahead without you, then he really isnt worth it. Perhaps find out why his friends dont like you ? but at the same time tell him that your not just being jealous, your his girfriend its his party ... (read in full...)
We're comfortable with each other in every way... except when it comes to sex!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a year now, and have been living together for a very long time. We are completely comfortable with each other in every way except sexually. I enjoy trying new things, and watching porns, and even ...
A. 15 June 2005: Maybe whilst the two of you are together, sexually you can gradually introduce some toys, something like a love egg at first and start to play with yourself with it and see his reaction, he may very well like the sight of you playing and that could ... (read in full...)
My folks found out that my boyfriend is 19, now they won't let me see him...
Q. I'm 14. I have a 19 year old boyfriend but I look like I'm 17 or 18. He knows I'm 14. I've known him for a year. My parents found out, now we can never see each other. Do you think I should let him go or try to make it work? ...
A. 15 June 2005: 5 years isnt that big an age difference, but thinking ahead he is 19 so he is probably looking for a more adult relationship... you are 2 years off the age for consent to sexual intercourse, so this needs to be beared in mind. Your parents are ... (read in full...)
Why are we arguing so much lately?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for 4 months now and its been great but just these last week or so we have been fighting about absolutely anything and everything! I love her and dont want our relationship to end just because of silly little things. ...
A. 15 June 2005: Maybe sit down together and be open and honest and discuss this with her. Let her know that you are having trouble dealing with the rows and you wondered if there was a bigger problem behind it and would like to help iron out the creases. Tell her ... (read in full...)
My friend has what seems like a great life, but he's making terrible desicions! Can I help him?
Q. This is more of a situation problem than a relationship. I'm a teen and there is this guy that I'm best friends with that I love...not in love, I just love who he is. He has amazing friends and a great life, from my point of view. But now he feels...
A. 15 June 2005: If you are that good a freinds then talking to him about it shouldnt be a problem. I think what you need to find out first though is there a reason for why he suddenly wants to start drinking and doing other things ? try and talk to him and let ... (read in full...)
My ex-husband just uses me and the kids as a "back up" while he waits for the next relationship!
Q. I have been divorced for for 11 months, and my ex got married to this woman and he did everything for her and bought her the world. We have two kids together and she finally got to know the girls around 4 months age. My oldest daughter was gett...
A. 15 June 2005: It sounds as though he really wants this other woman and is just using you as a base should it all go wrong. he has realised that he cant have you the kids and her, and hes got obssesed by her. The only thing you can do for the sake of the kids is ... (read in full...)
I feel rejected because my partner "just doesn't like" having sex during my periods...
Q. I'm wondering whether I'm making a fuss over nothing, as it's hard to get men's honest opinions on this: should I be bothered that my partner "just doesn't like" making love during my periods. For the record, he is not squeamish about anything else ...
A. 15 June 2005: Hey, some men really dont like it, some men view that its the womans time of the month and lets you have your privacy. You should respect that he doesnt want to have sex with at this time as he just doesnt feel right. There isnt anything wrong in ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's behaviour changed after he found out that I'm pregnant...
Q. I found out I was pregnant five weeks ago and I only told my boyfriend three weeks ago. He was fine about it until his mum and dad found out. Now he will not answer my calls and when he rings he is drunk. Is this his way of saying that he doesn't ...
A. 15 June 2005: Hes obviously feeling under pressure, and at the moment his way of dealing with it is to pretend that it doesnt exist.. i.e not speak to you or be with you then the problem will disappear. Now, I dont know how old you guys are but im guessing that ... (read in full...)
There's a big age gap, but can it work between us?
Q. Will a 35 year old female marrying a 60 year old male make a successful marriage?...
A. 15 June 2005: Age is merely a number as they say. Its up to you if it will work and how the two of you are together. There is nothing to say that you cant be together and that it wont work. there are countless marriages where the couples are the same age or ... (read in full...)
All my bf/s friends and family seem to hate me and it's a terrible strain!
Q. Hiya, I am 21years old, an Indian girl from the UK. I love my boyfriend and have been together for almost 2years. I am not the conventional Indian girl and enjoy going out and have had previous boyfriends etc. His famiy and friends put me t...
A. 14 June 2005: You need to get your boyfriend to tell his friends and family that no matter what they say he is with you and they have to accept it. Tell him that its really hard for you and let him know just how desperate you are and how bad you are feeling. He ... (read in full...)
Why does he change from nice to mean so suddenly?
Q. My partner is nice one minute and putting me down the next why is this?...
A. 14 June 2005: Theres not really much to go on here ?? Perhaps you need to sit down and ask him why ? Without to much info here its hard to say why he would do this, maybe its because he feels insecure at times and isnt sure how the two of you are panning out. ... (read in full...)
I don't want to stop my boyfriend from having friends, but he treats her better than he treats me...
Q. Me and my boyfriend are having a baby soon and have been together for three years. I love him very much. Recently he has become really close to another girl. They text each other all the time and she's the one that he mostly spends with at the ...
A. 14 June 2005: YOu need to sit and tell him your fears as soon as possible for the sake of you and the baby. Let him know that you are feeling neglected and that you are unsure as to why he would rather spend time with her, let him know how much you care about ... (read in full...)
I said that I'd marry my boyfriend, but now I realise that it's too soon!
Q. Please I'm a teenager in desperate need for help. I recently accepted my boyfriend's proposal to marriage. But,now I'm confused because I think I am too young and afraid people may not approve of our relationship because he is working class. But I ...
A. 14 June 2005: Hey where is the rush... just because he has asked you to marry him doesnt mean you have to do it straight away. Why not have a long engagement ? he is expressing how much he loves you and wants to be with you, but there is nothing to say you have ... (read in full...)
Even though we live together, we have no physical contact, and now I've fallen for someone at work...
Q. I've been with my partner for 6 and a half years now. We live together and have a son together. We have had no physical contact for about 3 years now and I've recently started work and have fell for someone there. I can't get him out of my head. I ...
A. 14 June 2005: You really need to find out why there is not intimacy with you and your current partner, and decide whether there is a future for you, it sounds as though you have gotten in to a routine and you are together for the sake of your son. Sit and talk ... (read in full...)
We tried to have sex, but it hurt so much I had to ask my boyfriend to stop!
Q. I'm really worried! Me and my boyfriend of 6 months tried to have sex and it hurt so much that I had to tell him to stop! I am a virgin and I wanna know how I can make it any easier because I really am worried that that isn't normal! Help!...
A. 14 June 2005: Maybe you need to ensure that you are properly lubricated before you try again,.. all woman are different, and whilst you may feel that you were turned on enough it could just be you that were not quite wet enough for your first time. Maybe try ... (read in full...)
I like a co-worker, but it's hard to gauge his feelings because he's so shy!
Q. I really like this guy from work. We hardly get to talk to each other as we are from different departments. I tried to get him to talk to me by sending him a couple of work-related emails. He did talk to me those couple of times and also mailed me ...
A. 14 June 2005: Maybe continue the emails, with a nature of how are you type things, what did you get up to at the weekend that type thing and see if you can get some nice chatting going along, leave it a couple of weeks of maybe nice flirting my email see how ... (read in full...)
My bf doesn't know I slept with someone else and I don't know if I should tell him, 'cause I suspect he cheated too!
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. He is really good to me. He has never pressured me into doing anything i dont want to do.I did something terrible to him i would think. The story begans like this when i first started talking to my boyfrien...
A. 14 June 2005: I think that if you really think he has cheated and so have you that you should let this ride and say nothing. it appears that the trust element has now gone and you need to rebuild this before you can move on. You either come clean and hope he ... (read in full...)
My parents have forbidden me to see or even talk to my boyfriend!
Q. My parents do not like my boyfriend. Im not allowed to see him or even speak to him. Ok, He went to jail for hitting his mom. He is out now, i love him more than ever. People keep telling me that I should break up with him bcuz he may end up hurting ...
A. 14 June 2005: I think that you will just have to be paitent for a while. Your parents are only looking out for thier little girl, and they dont want you to get hurt, and with the past record of your boyfriend they are scared that hes going to hurt you too. They ... (read in full...)
I secretly crave a big, busty woman, but my fiancee has the body of a model!
Q. "My fiance's body doesn't sexually interest me, but i truly love her." Ok, I've got a very interesting question for everyone. I'm 26 years old, and I'm engaged to a woman that I've been with for near 10 years. We're not legally married yet. She...
A. 14 June 2005: RIght from where im standing you seem to have 3 options.. 1, Carry on as you are let things deterioate, and you both end up hating each other and wasting both of your times... 2, Bite the bullet and leave her, as if you cant be 100% honest to h... (read in full...)
My b/f says she's an old family friend, but when he sees her, it's like I don't exist...
Q. My boyfriend has an old family friend that he totally gets lost in when he is with her. He ignores my calls when he is at her house. When we see her, he acts like he has never seen me before will not hold my hand or be lovey dovey, as he usually is. ...
A. 14 June 2005: Tell him how you feel... let him know that you are uncomfortable about this and cant understand why you get ignored when you are all together. Maybe she was an old flame and he still hasnt got her out of his system. You do need to chat to him and ... (read in full...)
Think I might have feelings for my wife's gay friend!
Q. My wife's best friend is gay - and I think I'm falling for him. I don't think I'm gay but I have had feelings for men in the past. This guy is really nice though - we get along really well, play fight and flirt all the time. He's recently broken u...
A. 14 June 2005: Maybe you actually need to come clean to your wife and tell her exactly how you are feeling. either that or completely walk away from this guy. If you cant do either then you really are in trouble.. it must be hard being married and then suddenly ... (read in full...)
Cheated on Guy No. 1 with Guy No.2... I'm still with Guy No. 2, but falling for Guy No. 3!
Q. I was with this guy for over a year and a half. Things weren't working out so I ended up cheating on him. The guy I cheated on him is the guy I am still with. The problem is I have this guy friend who I am really close to and I have liked for a lo...
A. 13 June 2005: YOu need to be careful on this one or you will end up on your own. It sounds as though you alwasy think that the grass is greener in the other side! Be warry, if your not happy with the guy you are with then you should finsih things before moving ... (read in full...)
I mentioned "commitment" to him and he's dropped out of sight!
Q. I haven't heard from the man I love in over a week. I mentioned a commitment to him because he said he loved me and wanted me to move to another state where he lives. I haven't heard from him in over a week he doesn't return my calls. Will I hear ...
A. 13 June 2005: He may have decided to think things through... its a big step for men to decide to be with one girl.. he says he loves you and suddenly went cold, hes probably scared of what will happen if you guys move together, call him up see how he is... chat ... (read in full...)
I can't understand why my g/f would want to hang out with her exes!
Q. I have been in a serious relationship for about 8 months now and I still have a problem with my girlfriends past. Although she was never sexually intimate with anyone besides me to my knowledge, she kissed many boys and more disturbingly is still...
A. 13 June 2005: Hey, we all have exes! thats part of life... the thing you need to remeber is that they are just that exes! She is with you now... as we go through life, we all end up with a past and we cant change that, we all experience various things with ... (read in full...)
My baby's father isn't who I thought it was. Should I let my ex think it's his?
Q. I wrote to you earlier on, about a week ago about my ex-boyfriend who I thought got me pregnant and left me. I did an ultrasound yesterday, and it proves the result that I am indeed pregnant from a friend that I got drunk with one night after I had ...
A. 13 June 2005: For the sake of the child you need to be honest from the start. If you start to lie you will only make this a whole lot worse. By decieving some in this way, it will only back fire. the truth always finds a way of coming out. Do what is best for ... (read in full...)
Should I wait until after exams to ask her out?
Q. I'm really good friends with the girl i fancy and i told her not so long ago that i fancied her and she said she was busy at the moment. I know she was being serious because we're doing our exams at the moment and we're friends so she wouldn't just ...
A. 13 June 2005: Leave it until after the exams and see how the land lies. You probably is busy at the moment and wants to do well and the less stress we have around such times the better. leave a week or so after the exams and build from there and see how things ... (read in full...)
I think he lacks intelligence and I don't know if we have a future... Do I end it?
Q. Dear Cupid, i have been dating my boyfriend for two years now and for the most part it's been a great relationship. Lately, however, I have started noticing how much smarter I am than him. I know that sounds awful but I have always been very goo...
A. 13 June 2005: Hey we are all different, if we we were all the same then life would be ultra boring! There must be a reason that you two are together still after two years.. you cant think is that less intelligent than you or you wouldnt be together! Who cares ... (read in full...)
Is our strange relationship going to be harmful to our kids?
Q. Need some opinions...trying to decide if I should move on or hang on... My ex-husband and I got married about 10 years ago when I found out I was pregnant. We were not in love, but felt a strong commitment to our child. We did fall in love and he ...
A. 13 June 2005: I dont see that it will harm the children, they will need to have input from both parents as they grow up. If you live apart, that not strange this day and age. If you can keep thigns positive when the children are around then there shouldnt be a ... (read in full...)
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