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... Send *endyg a private message | | | *endyg's profile:I'm a 33 year old Business Analyst, in Hertfordshire.
I live in herts along with my Lovely Staffordshire bull terrier Archie and two lully cats! Rosie and Umbro!
Anyway, I stumbled across this site a couple of years back now and became addicted straight away! Anyway my friends used to always tell me that I gave good advice and I am a good listener.
I guess I try to put myself in other peoples situations and its easier looking in when your not directly involved. So anyway I gave this a shot, and here I am, I have had lots of positive feedback from people who have posted questions and I have done my best to advise, so I must be doing something right!
If I only make one person's life better with the advice I give then its worth it!
I like to make people happy and help if I can. I will go that extra mile if it will make someone smile!
x x
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Why is the sex bad?
Q. I just can't have good sex. I have had two partners in my lifetime and with both, the penis can't stay inside of me. I don't know if this is normal. If someone can tell me what's going on, it would be great....
A. 2 June 2006: You need to relax and take your time. None of us are automatically good at sex, and none us now straight away what works for us. it takes time and experimentation and a caring partner. You probably without knowing it tense it when the time occurs ... (read in full...)
She started out as a hot lover, now shes not interested at all, is it too late to get it back ?
Q. I wrote earlier today about the not so steady decline of sex in my relationship. The advice was sound in most cases, but not mine. I am very romantic and very patient, I have tried to speak with her first before seeking outside help. I have tried so ...
A. 1 June 2006: Well the question remains why ? There really does seem to be someone deep and hidden that you cant bring herself to tell you. Its hard cos you dont want to be pushing her but at the same time its frustrating. Now this is a stab in the dark, but ... (read in full...)
We've been married for 3 years, living together for 13, hes cheated since we got married, and is still in contact, how can I make him give her up ?
Q. my husband of 3 years, living together for 13 years has had an affair since we got married. Now he says that he wants me and loves me but can't get his lover out of his head and don't know what to do. he promises me every week that he won't text her ...
A. 1 June 2006: I do wish you all the best of luck, and If I can offer any help at any time dont hesitate to ask. I really hope things work out well for you. You deserve to be happy.
Take care x ... (read in full...)
I found pictures of ladies on my husbands phone!
Q. What should i do? I found pictures of other women on my husbands phone, when i confronted him he said that his work mates had sent them to him. He promised not to receive any more of them.I now know that he has a seperate phone that he hides aw...
A. 1 June 2006: Well he is clearly hiding something from you. Why else would he have a seperate phone that you know nothing about. I presume these pictures where of a naked nature, maybe they were from other work mates and are just a bit of fun, but why the other ... (read in full...)
Why does he talk for ages at night with me, but during the day cuts me short! Is there another girl ?
Q. My boyfriend is always cutting me short on the phone during the day, but we talk for hours at night. What does this mean? Is there another girl?...
A. 1 June 2006: Well at least you were honest lost and alone... but hope you dont make a habit of it!
Just because hes cutting you short during the day doesn have to mean that hes cheating. He could just be busy during the day, and wants to wait until he has more... (read in full...)
This guy at my girlfriends work is trying it on with her...
Q. Ok, my girlfriend brought up this guy thats been visiting her at work recently. I guess he comes by every once in a while, and it seems like every time he stays for longer. Like until after the store closes, which got her in trouble with a manager. ...
A. 1 June 2006: Okay, he either is very lonely and feels that he can chat openly with your girl as shes great to talk to or hes a really wierd creepy guy! Perhaps both. He seems to be stalking her in anycase! Whichever he is, I wouldnt really want to be around him ... (read in full...)
We've been married for 3 years, living together for 13, hes cheated since we got married, and is still in contact, how can I make him give her up ?
Q. my husband of 3 years, living together for 13 years has had an affair since we got married. Now he says that he wants me and loves me but can't get his lover out of his head and don't know what to do. he promises me every week that he won't text her ...
A. 1 June 2006: Crikey, to think that you are letting this guy get away with cheating on you for all that time, and you are even now being very very reasonable... I apperciate that you love him, but in your heart do you really think that you will feel the same way ... (read in full...)
I got frisky with my friend, how do I get him to talk about it?
Q. I've been friends with a guy for about a year and 8 months now. We don't get to see each other too often anymore, what with university and everything. But 10 months ago, we were at picnic/party thing with some other friends we don't really see that...
A. 1 June 2006: Just tell him straight, its likely hes thinking the same thing and doesnt know how to approach you about it!! Thats Generally the way! Arrange a time when the two of you can have a chat, maybe go out for a drink, just the one though hey!! tee hee ... (read in full...)
Is this a good reason to want sex?
Q. hey, i ask my boyfriend, (who wants sex) why do you want it, whats the main reason, he replys, because its the next step in a relationship. is this a good enough reason?...
A. 1 June 2006: Sorry shoulda read... You "shouldnt" need a reason for sex. slight typo! x... (read in full...)
We broke up but I don't understand why!
Q. My girlfriend and I recently broke up. I really don't know why. i think it's cuz she is afraid of getting hurt, but i love her(havent told her that yet though) and i wont ever hurt her. but i dont think she believes me. right now i'm giving her a ...
A. 1 June 2006: I think you need to sit down and talk to her. She may well be afraid. Perhaps she has fallen in love with you and is scared that you dont feel the same way. So to avoid getting in deeper she bolted. Let her know how you feel, at least you will ... (read in full...)
Will my relationship with my girlfriend work out?
Q. On and off again, 5 times in 5 months. Is she going to change her mind again this time? To make this as short as possible, i'll leave out the insignificant details...I moved to where I'm at now, 2100 miles from home, last year and met a girl at the ...
A. 1 June 2006: Well looking at the evidence I think you do actually know the answer. Its not likely. 5 times in 5 months, your in a vicious circle, and the more you take her back the more it continues. The trouble is now she thinks that no matter what she does ... (read in full...)
Is this a good reason to want sex?
Q. hey, i ask my boyfriend, (who wants sex) why do you want it, whats the main reason, he replys, because its the next step in a relationship. is this a good enough reason?...
A. 1 June 2006: I agree with Dr Pete. You should need a reason to have sex, you should both be ready enough to have sex. Just because one says "well it is the next step" doesnt mean it means anything. You should be at a comfortable stage of your relationship, ... (read in full...)
I'm shy and not sure about going to a wedding with my boyfriend. He's distracted and won't say whether he cares!
Q. Hi, My boyf and I have been together for 18 months, and are currently living together. We argue a lot, usually when I'm upset about something and he tries to tell me that I need to grow up and stop being pathetic!! This really hurts as I don't...
A. 31 May 2006: Personally I would tell him to get the hell outta my space! And no I wouldnt go to the wedding. Why is he so mean ? Perhaps he cant deal with people that have issues or indeed just his girlfriend. Some men dont cope with problems to well and ... (read in full...)
Met on the net and never met in person, but he wants to marry me, within the next 2 months! What should I do?
Q. I met my boyfriend on the internet. He lives in India, and I live in the U.S. We have never met, but have communicated for 15 months, and we fell in love. He has been pressuring me relentlessly to marry him, almost from the beginning. It is NOT that ...
A. 31 May 2006: Well distance is always a hard thing where any relationship is concerned. Just because his culture have arranged marriages meaning in some cases not meeting the person until the day, doesnt mean that you have to carry on this way. Why is he being ... (read in full...)
She doesn't want to talk about this, but I feel alone.....
Q. I am a 26 year old male who has been in a relationship with my girlfriend for just over four years. When we entered this relationship she was physical and sexual, but shortly after the official commitment, the sexual activity dropped. I love her, I ...
A. 31 May 2006: I know how hard this can be I had issues like that myself previously, I was more keen than my partner surprisingly, but somehow we just found a way by being intimate in other ways that eventually led to us getting back on the right track. its ... (read in full...)
Can we move on from our past or no? What should I do?
Q. After a bad end to a bad relationship which resulted in our son being born - he's nearly three. My ex and I have begun getting on really well. We spent two lovely weekends together and inevitably slept together. We have so much history not all good, ...
A. 31 May 2006: Well first off find out if hes thinking the same. See if he wants to have another go. Maybe the time apart is what you both needed and now you have started again. Have a chat and see if you both have at least some of the same goals, and see where ... (read in full...)
My ex of 3 years ago still loves me and wants me back, I dont know what to do as I dont want to let my current BF down!
Q. I need some advice.... I was in a relationship for nearly 5 years, from the age of 16. My ex decided to break up as he believed he didn't see a future for us. Although this was over 3 years ago it still left me in bits. Looking back we were only ...
A. 31 May 2006: Okay, are you really prepared to throw away what you have now for someone that has already once said to you that he doesnt think there is a future for the two of you ? I know you said you have grown up since then, but what else has changed ? Whats ... (read in full...)
I believe someone lying to me.....how can I get over this?
Q. ok my current bf (17)(and i am 16) thought i was going to dump him so he went to my best friend and told her he had feelings for her then when she told him she had feelings for him too he said he was staying with me. but that is only the beginning ...
A. 31 May 2006: Well I think the only way you can move on is to found out which one of them is lying! Unless you do its always going to be there, the wondering and the disappointment and indeed some doubt. In any relationship you need trust, and you obviously ... (read in full...)
What does beauty is in the eye of the beholder mean?
Q. what does 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder' mean?...
A. 31 May 2006: Yeah Bonym thats the way I use it, just sometimes helps to brighten someones day. It was my mum that used to say it to me when I lived at home when I complained of a bad hair day or something like that tee hee!
x ... (read in full...)
What does beauty is in the eye of the beholder mean?
Q. what does 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder' mean?...
A. 31 May 2006: Hey Bonym your description was excellent! Dont think I can add much, except that I use this phrase alot! ... (read in full...)
Trousers: better tight or loose?
Q. Do teenage boys prefer girls in tight trousers or not tight trousers? I don't wear tight trousers. Will boys still think I am 'fit' even if I don't wear tight trousers?...
A. 31 May 2006: If somebody likes you and is attacted to you, then I dont think what you wear is an issue. What you wear is up to you and is part of making you individual. You are the person that you are and have a personality of your own regardless of what you ... (read in full...)
There's more than meets the eye with my guy's female friend!
Q. I wrote before about this girl moving next door that works w/my guy. Well, I did what he asked and tried to talk to her to get to know her but she was very short: yes or no! She answered my questions with no responding question. It was a one side...
A. 31 May 2006: Why are you so adamant that shes after your man ? She is probably very shy as your man says and needs all the friends she can get. What is it she has done to you exactly ? Has your man ever given you any reason to doubt him ? its not about this ... (read in full...)
He has a gf but he and I are going out on a date. Will we end up together as an item or will I be disappointed?.
Q. Hi,I met a guy a few weeks ago-there was some flirting and instant chemistry but was spoiled by the fact he has a girlfriend-but we are going to go out next week. I am coming to the end of my studies and so is he so in a few weeks time we shall be ...
A. 31 May 2006: Sorry but you know he has a gf so why is that you are going on a date with him ? You are both on the end of your studies and wont see each other again, so you thought you would go on a date for what reason ? Just to chill and have a laugh ? Maybe ... (read in full...)
Will he lose respect for me if we go to a f***-buddy type relationship from just friends?
Q. hi im curious if there are any guys to give me some perspective. im contemplating a strictly sex/friend relationship with a friend of mine who has wanted to for some time now. i have no worries about it, i know about the attachement problems and i ...
A. 31 May 2006: From past experience of this myself, I would recommend sticking as friends. Its cool when you think you are friends with that added extra... But when one of you feels more than the other it causes complications. I started to fall for my f*** ... (read in full...)
His ex's bits and pieces are still round his flat!
Q. Dear cupid I have started seeing a new man. He seems really nice but there is one problem. I went round his flat and he still has her shampoo and other bits in his bathroom and Her exercise and weight chart on the fridge. Is it something to wor...
A. 30 May 2006: I guess it depends on how they broke up ? Did she collect all her other stuff or did he just forward it on ? Its not that bigger deal I wouldnt say hes just not thrown it out yet. Things like that dont mean much to men, it doesnt occur to them to ... (read in full...)
I'm confused... we're friends, we go out, we sleep together... but when things start getting "hotter" she says "stop!". Why?
Q. Can someone please try and explain whats going on for me? I'm 25 year old male and have a 17 year old female friend that i've 'kinda been seeing'...we talk on msn nearly every night and meet up every week or two (she lives about 15miles from me)...
A. 30 May 2006: She enjoys your company, she enjoys all the things you do together. Cuddling and holding each other is very intimate for a couple to do. She's not ready yet to take it further, there shouldnt be any pressure on her, she likes you alot, and knows ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend lives far away, will he get fed up?
Q. i have been seeing my boyfriend for about a month, i really like him but he lives quite far and cant see me every day, i understand this but i just feel as though he will get fed up and meet someone who lives closer to him. what do you think?...
A. 30 May 2006: Hey give the relationship a chance. Its not nearly got off the ground yet. Just because you cant see each other all the time doesnt mean you will like each other any less. Let him know how you feel, not full on, but mention that the distance is a ... (read in full...)
He lasted under two minutes, was lazy at oral and had a pointyh shaped "thing"... But I was good to him so why did our relationship cool off?!
Q. I recently dated someone who was a good bit younger than I. We're both professionals in our 30s. I'm 38. At the beginning of this short relationship, he did say he was reserved and devoted to work. When it came to sex, he always climaxed in under ...
A. 30 May 2006: Would it be strange to say that he was embarrased ? Whilst he wanted the relationship, he was getting what he wanted out of it so maybe didnt think he needed to make the effort as he was okay. Unless he was very inexperienced as regards to sex and ... (read in full...)
I'm concerned about how I'm feeling, any advice please!
Q. hi there, im feeling sick, my heatbeat has increased in speed and my underarms are sweating so badly! Whats wrong with me??? Im concerned! Thank you! ...
A. 30 May 2006: Er.... Depends on which part of the world you are... Could you simply be hot by chance ? You havent really given that much information for anybody to be able to advise you.
I suggest if you are feeling that unwell that you seek medical advice s... (read in full...)
My friend went through the 'Mummy Test' and I might have overreacted
Q. Fellow agony aunts, I have a friend who has been seeing a guy for about a month. Her guy wants a wife and kids - he is at the stage of life where these things should have happened by now. My friend is a few months away from starting her doctorate ...
A. 30 May 2006: I dont think a month is too early at all! When my relationship started it only took a couple of weeks before I have met the parents. I would think it odd if it didnt kinda happen that way. It shows that your guy is into you and cant wait for ... (read in full...)
I want to talk on the phone, and my BF doesn't!
Q. My boyfriend and I are having terrible disputes over being on the phone. Ikay I've been with my bf for 2, going on 3, years and he knows I love talking on the phone and particularly with him. So he always gets on the phone and don't say anything and ...
A. 30 May 2006: I agree with Phoebe, as soon as I read your question I thought hes not a phone person. Lots of men are like this. I live with my man, but I know before we did in the begining we would be on the phone for ages, mainly me harping on and him ... (read in full...)
Lose weight or my boyfriend?
Q. I have a problem...I have been with my boyfriend for 6 and a half years we have a child together. We were young when we got together and my child came along quickly and unplanned. I have always loved him but the past year or so I have been havi...
A. 30 May 2006: Well Martini, If you look I did suggest that Happylife use the forum if he was so adamant on making a debate. Instead of that he proceeded to actually attack me and turned this all into an argument. Of course this didnt help the girl that asked ... (read in full...)
He can't forgive me for a long ago affair...I am so unhappy. Do we divorce or keep trying?
Q. Dear Cupid, I was married for 7-8 years now. First two years when we had sex it was all about him. He had it for 30 min and I was enjoyed it too but not as I could. He never asks me about how I feel after his love except traditional: 'I love you...
A. 29 May 2006: Oh dear, sounds as though you are feeling that you are stuffed if you stay stuffed if you go. Okay, obviously you will be wanting to put your daughter first, but its no use getting her all well again and then having the same situation arise. You ... (read in full...)
Unprotected sex... could I be pregnant?
Q. hi i had unprotected sex a day after my period had finished and was just wandering if i could still have gotten pregnant. ...
A. 29 May 2006: It doesnt matter what time of the month you think you are safe, unprotected sex can always lead to pregancy. Everybodys cycle is different and its not unheard of womens cycles to suddenly change from one month to the next for no reason. We tend to ... (read in full...)
Could I be pregnant even if the tests show a negative?
Q. Me and my partner have been trying for a baby for over 12 months. July last year I had a miscarriage, but since then I haven't managed to get caught pregnant. My period is now over 1 week late. I have done 3 pregnancy tests where they're all ...
A. 29 May 2006: My sister with both her pregnancies, had the result come out as negative on both the tests she did. Whilst the home pregnancy tests are pretty accurate Sometimes the hormone that is normally present in the urine to show a positive result isnt always ... (read in full...)
Internet guy Im dating is in a relationship with someone else with a daughter, any advice please!
Q. i need some advice.i am in a long distance relationship with this guy who i met over the internet.we have been together for six months now and have known each other as friends for a year all together.but just a few days ago he tells me that he has ...
A. 29 May 2006: The thing you need to be sure off, was his relationship bad before he met you ? He could be in a turmoil and is telling you what you want to hear. Yes hes fallen for you, and the way he can tell you hes in a relationship already is to tell you ... (read in full...)
Sex hurts and i just don't know what to do!
Q. At the beginning sex was very wonderful and passionate and i was very turned on. But i still feel those ways but it somewhat hurts. I feel myself being streched or he hits something and it hurts. What should i do. I stil think its wonderful, ...
A. 29 May 2006: Maybe try and relax and bit more and as bev suggests, maybe do a little more foreplay. You are probably a bit apprenshive each time now and maybe you clam up a bit just in case! I know ive had where all of suddenly it feels like someone has kicked ... (read in full...)
Worried about private parts.. Any advice appreciated
Q. would a female be detered by my penis? it is just under 6 inches erect but i cannot pull the foreskin back. i am afraid that i wont be able to have sex properly but i can still have good orgasms....
A. 29 May 2006: Hi there I agree with what Andy20 has to say, although he is male and I may self wouldnt expereince it.. in any case, it could be that you have a short ferenulum, and some cases no amount of streching will fix it, as the skin that attaches the ... (read in full...)
Husbands holiday is really getting to me... What should I do??
Q. My hubby and I haven't been married a year yet... The opportunity came up for him to go to Myrtle beach with his friends and he of course with no hesitation, agreed to go with them without discussing it with his wife first. When he asked me if he ...
A. 29 May 2006: Whilst I agree that he should have at least asked you or made sure you were cool with it before he went in accepting, its his life too and you shouldnt really stop him from doing what he wants. I appreciate you had your reasons for not wanting him ... (read in full...)
I think I have feelings for my one night stand, should I tell him ?
Q. I am 22 and single, and very recently had a 1 night stand with a guy from work, only now I have to see him everyday and I think I might have feelings for him. Should I talk to him???...
A. 28 May 2006: Well, I was in a situation like this a few years back. I sat like 3 desks away from the guy and found it really hard to make eye contact and all that! So anyway I dropped him an email, just a quick note to say hi, think we hit off pretty well the ... (read in full...)
Checking out the checkout manager
Q. Hi... I'm 29 (just as a matter of interest...) and I feel 16! I really fancy this guy who's a manager in a shop attached to a gas station locally. I go in to buy stuff I don't even need! Just to see him. I chat to him... he knows my name and I know ...
A. 28 May 2006: Well as far as does he have a girlfriend, without coming out and directly asking him Im not sure your going to find out. Try and bite the bullet and get chatting, and maybe something will evolve. Maybe leave a slip of paper with your number on, ... (read in full...)
Checking out the checkout manager
Q. Hi... I'm 29 (just as a matter of interest...) and I feel 16! I really fancy this guy who's a manager in a shop attached to a gas station locally. I go in to buy stuff I don't even need! Just to see him. I chat to him... he knows my name and I know ...
A. 28 May 2006: The thing is he could be feeling exactly like you... too scared to ask! If you dont bite the bullet you may never know! See if you cant get into a conversation about stuff, things that you may have recently done and see if you cant find a commmon ... (read in full...)
Lose weight or my boyfriend?
Q. I have a problem...I have been with my boyfriend for 6 and a half years we have a child together. We were young when we got together and my child came along quickly and unplanned. I have always loved him but the past year or so I have been havi...
A. 27 May 2006: To be quite honest happylife I aint getting into no debate with you, I havent got a clue whats in the book, all I know is that from what YOU wrote it sounded that woman are there to service man, You dont need to debate here if you really want to do ... (read in full...)
Lose weight or my boyfriend?
Q. I have a problem...I have been with my boyfriend for 6 and a half years we have a child together. We were young when we got together and my child came along quickly and unplanned. I have always loved him but the past year or so I have been havi...
A. 26 May 2006: Sorry, but I got to number 1 on this his needs her needs thing on the men section and really wanted to punch the screen... Happy life.... Life is not what we read in books, we are all different and we all feel different about so many things... that ... (read in full...)
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