How to get over dissapointment of being so close to finding The One?
Q. I fell in love with a guy who has so many characteristics I am looking for. He is so much of what I’ve hoped to have as a husband but never thought would exist out there. Long story short, he has three big deal breakers to him. These things are...
A. 2 November 2022: In the end, you need to shake this off and not think - I was SOOO close" but OH I really dodged a bullet here!!!
3 big red flags are huge.
You also need to realize that you are NOT stuck in love with him, you are STUCK in love with the POTENTI... (read in full...)
Partner invited friend over to stay while I am away
Q. It being less than month since I moved in with my boyfriend and I’m thinking I’ve done the wrong thing. Last week, he blurted out in an argument that he had invited his friend over to stay for the night whilst I’m away working. I have never met h...
A. 2 November 2022: Oh, it WAS a mistake to move in with him!!
Time to move right back out. And end this.
He has sleepovers with another woman while you are at work?
Why would SHE come to have a sleepover at a friend's house? She is a GROWN aSS woman! Unless ... (read in full...)
My mom found my boyfriend and i's naughty texts
Q. Hi! I just found out my boyfriends mom went through my boyfriend and I's text (they were not very PG), she found out yesterday and she acted completely normal and even let my boyfriend come to the house but today my Dad asked me if my Mom had ta...
A. 2 November 2022: Absolutely agree with FA,
While you SAY you are "all talk" FOR NOW - talk leads to actions. Maybe not now, maybe not yet, but more likely than not.
And even if it doesn't you know ANYONE who reads those can not tell that you two are "just ha... (read in full...)
Need advice on how to proceed in my relationshi
Q. My partner and I have been together 7 years. We have been engaged since 6 months in. I cannot bring myself to take the next step and get married because I’m so terrified of marriage being surrounded by family members in unhappy marriages. Plus ...
A. 28 October 2022: OP,
You already were given answers last time you posted this question.
He is not a good fit for you because YOU have kids and he doesn't LIKe kids (or at least not yours).
How do you think that will affect YOUR children growing up?
... (read in full...)
Too much
Q. Ok, so I have a issue , uhh I may or may not masturbate, and I might have gotten addicted it just feels so good! But I kinda gross myself out, does anybody know how to stop? ...
A. 27 October 2022: Self-control, honey.
While I get that masturbation is not necessarily a bad thing to do, I think moderation and self-control are good lessons to learn. It is a normal function of your body. Part of puberty is sexual drive and the bodily changes ... (read in full...)
How do I come out to my female partner
Q. How do I come out to my female partner? Hey people, any help will be appreciated, I'm looking for advice on how I can get out of a situation I've stupidly got myself in. So, I'm gay but have a girlfriend and I really don't want to hurt hurt, but the ...
A. 27 October 2022: You say you don't want to hurt her but then you flirt with men online and go out and have sex with an almost stranger?!
Just rip off the band-aid! Tell her, I'm sorry I have come to realize that I'm gay. I can't string you along, it's not fai... (read in full...)
What if you are turned on by your physical therapist?
Q. Hi. My first name is Tanner. I injured my right shoulder in a fall trying to do parkour on some concrete structures. I am obviously not as good as I thought. I had other injuries but the shoulder is the big deal. So right now I am doing physical...
A. 26 October 2022: "Should I text her at all other than my therapy?"
Nope, not at all.
Her calling you stud might be to also make light of the situation, to show you it doesn't bother her that your body reacted.
You MIGHT want to wear a pair of compression sh... (read in full...)
My boyfriend sabotages me looking good.
Q. My boyfriend ignores what it takes for me to feel like a woman and to feel confident. We are in a serious relationship for a very long time now, we share finances and it's gotten to the point where he just doesn't think it's necessary for me to get ...
A. 24 October 2022: WHY are you sharing finances?!! you are NOT married.
Why are you letting a BF control you with money like this?
WHY are you with this guy at all?
He sounds like a self-absorbed controlling asshat!!
" He says I make a big deal out of no... (read in full...)
I think he's cheating
Q. Been seeing a guy on and off for almost 2 years met through online dating. My friend is also on the site I was on. She told me a guy matches everything that my boyfriend is its certain things only he does its very rare things. The profile matched ...
A. 24 October 2022: You are seeing this guy on and off - so maybe he sees you as a CASUAL partner?
Do you know his full name? - is it his REAL name? Do you know where he works? Do you know where he lives?
Have you BEEN to his place?
And why haven't you met any ... (read in full...)
Why won't he block her
Q. So I’m in a new relationship and things are amazing he’s the most amazing man I’ve met. We have such a laugh together and he says he hasn’t felt like this in a long time and we had a mini break together which was fantastic and we message all day ...
A. 24 October 2022: Two things OP
1. It's not up to you to "demand" who he can talk to and who he can not. The same goes for blocking. Just as HE can not demand you stop talking to anyone or that YOU block anyone.
2. If he can treat HER this way, don't you think ... (read in full...)
My sister inlaws mom wants my friends phone numbers
Q. My sister-in-law's mother is a control freak. She has all of my sister-in-law's friends numbers, all of my brother's friends phone number, and their neighbor's phone number. She claims that she needs it just in case there is something wrong,...
A. 24 October 2022: WiseOwlE,
it's not OP's mom. It's his brother's wife's mom who wants the phone numbers... which makes it even more nuts.
... (read in full...)
How do I tell my family I don't want them in the room whenI give birth?
Q. I am the youngest of 4. I have 3 older sisters and they have 3 or children each. Anyway it is my first time being pregnant. I remember going to my sisters doctors appointments and seeing them give birth. My parents made me watch my sisters give ...
A. 23 October 2022: Talk to your doctor, and set your BIRTHING PLAN now.
Include in the birthing plan that you ONLY want hubby in the room NO ONE else. TELL the OB/GYN as well - HAVE IT in your records. And they won't let them in.
"My sisters and mom were already... (read in full...)
My sister inlaws mom wants my friends phone numbers
Q. My sister-in-law's mother is a control freak. She has all of my sister-in-law's friends numbers, all of my brother's friends phone number, and their neighbor's phone number. She claims that she needs it just in case there is something wrong,...
A. 23 October 2022: Jeeez!
NO, absolutely NO you do not OWE that crazy lady, your number, or those of your friends! I mean WHAT THE ACTUAL F!!
Stand your ground. Tell your brother that it's ridiculous and they can stop asking. They need to set some boundaries ... (read in full...)
Too far behind in life
Q. This is terrible because I know I should be happy for my health but my mental health suffers. So Nearly 35 haven't had sex in 12 years had bad experiences with girls when younger I tried just flings but felt bad if they started to like me more so ...
A. 23 October 2022: I think you are presuming that IF you had done X,Y,Z 15 years ago you would now be at point D, and you feel you are still at point B - however, it's impossible to really know if you would have made it to point D if things had gone differently.
... (read in full...)
Should I marry him? Wait or leave?
Q. My fiancé and I have been together for 7 years and I’m still afraid to get married. He purposed at 6 months and I said yes because at the time things were going good but as time progressed it seems to have gotten worse. We are so different. He’s ...
A. 20 October 2022: I think you are unsure for a reason.
That reason is that you KNOW deep down that this isn't working out.
He doesn't like your children?!! That should be a total deal breaker! At least to me. I get that he might not feel super connected to the... (read in full...)
Low libido?
Q. I've been married for 30 years. Recently we had some friends/relatives over for a day at the lake. My wife's cousin, more like a sister to her, has a new boyfriend (we'll call him Dave). He was there. Earlier in the day a fish bit his nipple and we ...
A. 20 October 2022: I don't think you are being overly sensitive, but menopause is a BITCH.
I think she was a little jealous of her cousin and the BF - she is seen this "new love" and wanted some attention too.
Her behavior WAS odd. OK a fish bit his nipple but w... (read in full...)
Uninvited from friend’s wedding
Q. I've known my friend "Lisa" since high school and we are both 30 now. We weren't each other's best friends but were still close. We started hanging out more often in 2019. That was the year my ex-fiance and I broke up. She invited me to several ...
A. 20 October 2022: How do you deal with it?
By being realistic.
You know the friendship was dead in the water for a long time and you still tried to throw it a life raft, she just didn't make time to pick it up. Because SHE also knew it was over.
It can ... (read in full...)
Son not going to college or working, does not help around house
Q. Hi and thanks So my son is 21 years old. After he graduated at 17, he's had no motivation to get a job or attend college. I have tried countless times to talk to him about it. I believe he suffers from anxiety. He's always over think...
A. 18 October 2022: I'd sit him down.
Give him a choice. Chores or get a job. OR move out and be homeless.
Give him a set of rules - such as, He cooks for himself, cleaning up after himself, do his own laundry.
I have a kiddo (22) who works 30 hours a week AN... (read in full...)
Did I answer her question wrong?
Q. Hi, I have been seeing someone for around 3 months everything is going great and im starting to really like her, however the other day she asked my if ive ever had a one night stand and immediately got up and left afterwards, I answered honestly and ...
A. 14 October 2022: Also, I forgot to add this earlier.
IF you were HONEST with her, you didn't answer her question "wrong".
She might not have WANTED to hear that you had casual sex and one-night stands but the reality is that you HAVE done this, like so many oth... (read in full...)
Did I answer her question wrong?
Q. Hi, I have been seeing someone for around 3 months everything is going great and im starting to really like her, however the other day she asked my if ive ever had a one night stand and immediately got up and left afterwards, I answered honestly and ...
A. 13 October 2022: I agree with Kenny,
I don't see an issue with asking that question, but I also think you should have asked HER about the same.
Also, it might be something to consider to talk about whether you two want to dig around in each other's past or ... (read in full...)
My husband wants to attend our high school reunion. I am worried about how we will be treated
Q. My husband. Zach, and I graduated from a all boy Catholic school in 2003. We didn't know each other was gay in high school since we both didn't come out of the closet until after we graduated. I always love spending time with Zach, even in hi...
A. 13 October 2022: Have you guys been in contact with anyone since graduation?
If so, don't they know already?
Accept that there are some people who think they have to judge others (I'm sure you have met some already in your life)
And if you want to go, then ... (read in full...)
Tired of being hurt give my love to animals instead
Q. I'm an introvert. I live with my partner who likes his space as well. As a true introvert, I'm happy and completely content in my own company. I'm self employed and happy plodding on with what I need to achieve each day. I walk my dog and always p...
A. 13 October 2022: "Anyone else feel like this?"
Not really. But I can relate.
The thing YOU haven't learned is setting some boundaries.
1. you CAN tell your mom to PLEASE call or text before popping in.
2. You can decide how LONG you want to sit and lis... (read in full...)
He is asking me for ideas on how to propose?
Q. I have a new partner (all started long distance) who I have been with on and off for 8 months - started in Feb - broke up on Mar 24 then he went home - came back in June - lived with me till mid Sept - then went home to get space and is back to me ...
A. 11 October 2022: The LEAST of your worries right now is HOW he should propose!!
Deal with your ex and the court case FIRST.
Secondly, a relationship that is OFF/ON is PROBABLY not going to work out long term, someone who "needs" breaks in a relationship is ... (read in full...)
He is asking me for ideas on how to propose?
Q. I have a new partner (all started long distance) who I have been with on and off for 8 months - started in Feb - broke up on Mar 24 then he went home - came back in June - lived with me till mid Sept - then went home to get space and is back to me ...
A. 11 October 2022: test
... (read in full...)
In a long distance relationship and I just found out that my gf is pregnant by another man!
Q. Hello I'm in a long distance relationship (like across the country) and today I learned from a friend of my girlfriend that she is pregnant by another man. I confronted my girlfriend and she admitted that she screwed up a few months ago and w...
A. 9 October 2022: So here is the million-dollar question.
Is cheating a DEAL-BREAKER or not?
And then ask yourself this:
Do you want to raise another man's child?
Do you want a partner who is unfaithful?
Do you want a partner who has unprotected s... (read in full...)
Can anyone please help me figure out what's going on with this guy?
Q. I'm 33 and single. I've known guy for the last 10 years from way back when we were studying. Although we were never friends, we knew people who were common to us. He was always very polite and civil and might I add, a good 10 years older. He added ...
A. 9 October 2022: You already KNEW he had acted creepy before and you thought, WHAT a great idea to reach out to his guy!! And then what? You realized he is still a creep.
SO what that he is still single?! There is probably a GOOD reason he is single.
You mad... (read in full...)
Friendship Woes
Q. Hello all, this isn’t necessarily a love/dating question, but a friendship dilemma in need of advice. I don’t know who to ask because I’ve only got a handful of people in my life and they’re mostly guys and don’t really have any solid advice. A...
A. 4 October 2022: It sucks to lose a good friend to distance or to a move. My best friend is 1,100 miles away and I DO miss her. We talk, we text, we send letters. I still miss her, but sometimes life throws you a curveball that can include a move across the ... (read in full...)
My husband has a crush on a younger woman
Q. Husband crushing on a younger female friend of ours. A few months ago I thought my husband was making inappropriate comments when under the influence of alcohol to our friend,also when her relationship was braking up my husband appeared way to ...
A. 4 October 2022: Maybe you and your husband need to take a wee break from this "circle of friends" a little?
And maybe you need to pull HER aside and tell her she is being inappropriate, that just because her marriage didn't work out it's not OK to hit on someone ... (read in full...)
An old friend who has a crush on me has resurfaced
Q. Hi, I recently turned 40 years old. I dated a guy (not a relationship) way back when I was a teen. We ultimately did not work, but while we were seeing each other we were kind of close. We would fall asleep on the phone together etc. ty...
A. 4 October 2022: Stalking you to "catch" you at your mom's house is kind of scary. Don't you think?
He isn't willing to accept the rejection. It's been DECADES!!
Yes you can keep blocking his accounts, yes you can tell him to stop showing up at your mom's house... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is unmotivated
Q. I am 32, I have been with my boyfriend for coming up to 3 years, he is 36. I have my own house/mortgage, he lives with his parents but had previously been living in NZ (Came back coz his mum is ill). Although we'd not been dating long he moved in...
A. 1 October 2022: Why are you still with him when the two of you are SO NOT compatible?
You are JUST a convenient place for him to crash. you "mommy" him by accepting that he doesn't contribute much to the household, he doesn't seem to want to DO anything with, ou... (read in full...)
My online African boyfriend keeps asking me for money
Q. Hello I met a man online. We talked for several months then he began asking me for money. He's from Africa, he said he's poor. I felt bad and sent him 20.00 for some food. Now there is always some issue. He needs for food, for transportation, ...
A. 1 October 2022: OP, have you been living under a rock?
This is an OBVIOUS "romance scam" He is MILKING you for money by making you feel BAD for him and thinking you are helping him out. You are, but not in the way you think.
BLOCK the dude. Stop sending mon... (read in full...)
Friendship Woes
Q. Hello all, this isn’t necessarily a love/dating question, but a friendship dilemma in need of advice. I don’t know who to ask because I’ve only got a handful of people in my life and they’re mostly guys and don’t really have any solid advice. A...
A. 1 October 2022: Opinions? Advice?
Just go change your number and give it to people YOU want to stay in contact with - ghost the rest - also make sure that the people you DO give the new number to, don't give it out without asking you first.
I would send her o... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is disgusted by my arousal
Q. My girlfriend of one year who is fifteen year old feel disgusted when i have a boner. I get boner when i am around her and when she touch me even though she said she is not ready for sex. Is it wrong to have boner as she always tell me and that i am ...
A. 1 October 2022: Sounds like your GF is VERY much still a CHILD who doesn't understand how the body works.
Date someone your own age..
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is unnecessarily blunt
Q. My boyfriend is so blunt to speak that he talk whatever he wants without thinking. It's so hurtful some time . No doubt he is loyalbut he has controlling behaviour like I want to do jobs he said ok u can do but at the same time he said there will be ...
A. 29 September 2022: So you hold yourself back from doing something you want to do because HE is insecure?
Don't.
He can either TRUST you or go fly a kite off a cliff~
If he can not or will not trust you, is he really someone you want to be with longterm?
... (read in full...)
My brother refuses to have anything to do with my former mistress
Q. My brother doesn’t like my life partner. We started out as an affair. We’ve put it behind us and are moving forward with our lives. It took us awhile and a lot of therapy to get to this place. But my brother is holding a grudge against my partner ...
A. 27 September 2022: "How do I handle this?"
By ACCEPTING that your brother can decide WHO he wants to be around, talk to, and socialize with. That is not up to you OR your partner to dictate that.
Actions - such as cheating, have consequences.
It seems like y... (read in full...)
I developed a crush on him but he wants to remain friends
Q. around 5 months ago i got talking to someone who i recognised, as he is a school friend of my siblings. i had never spoke to him before but just recognised him and started speaking to him, just outside a nightclub where we had both been I thought...
A. 27 September 2022: I think you should keep your "feelings for him" to yourself and just stop talking to him.
For whatever reason, he isn't into you as much as you are into him. He has figured out you are maybe crushing on him and he has pulled away.
Let this one ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong that I am barely on speaking terms with my parents but I am on good terms with my cousin?
Q. When my 1st cousin and I were 15 years old, she became pregnant and gave birth to a little girl. She claimed that I was the father but I was a virgin. Come to find out, her dad's best friend was molesting her since she was 12 years old. Due to fear ...
A. 24 September 2022: "Is it wrong that I am barely on speaking terms with my parents but I am on good terms with my cousin?"
No.
She was 15!! She was molested and raped. Got pregnant and had a child when SHE was still a child. Sure it was wrong to accuse you. Agai... (read in full...)
I'm a bored, married woman and I'm attracted to someone
Q. There is no justification for what I'm about to say so feel free to give me a piece of your mind . I'm a bored 38 year old married woman, mother to a 6 year old . I have an amazing husband and no problems in my marital life. The only problem is ...
A. 24 September 2022: " I know that nothing good can come off this!"
So you understand reality but you want to live some fantasy out because it would make YOU feel good, temporarily.
FIND a job, your kiddo is old enough for a school so you CAN do a part-time job if... (read in full...)
When is enough enough in regards to cheating
Q. A man I met once last summer got in touch with me a week ago. He wanted to meet for sex again, we are both married. He had got in touch earlier this summer and said about meeting up and I agreed then didn’t hear from him until now. He said it ...
A. 23 September 2022: This all sounds like a dysfunctional cluster fuck.
Why are you not single so you can fuck around as you please?
The "cheat partner" of yours does not OWE you exclusivity or fidelity.
If you are SO unhappy in your marriage and you think t... (read in full...)
How do I make my boyfriend calm down?
Q. This is about my boyfriend Cameron who is a good person but keeps annoying me. He said he understands I do not want to have sex and he said he will be a virgin with me and not put any pressure on me to have sex. He says the right things but his ...
A. 23 September 2022: " He says he understands but cannot control getting hard and wanting sex but that sounds questionable to me. I told him a boy only gets an erection if he is planning to have sex and hoping the girl will give in."
No, you are wrong.
YOU are... (read in full...)
Big question how to get over someone
Q. How do you get over someone? So I’m not even allowed to be sad as we were never official but for past 4yrs I’ve been sleeping with this guy (yes judge me) I was lonely and it became a regular thing dinner and drinks staying over one or two times...
A. 23 September 2022: Only 3 things will help you here.
Time & distance & reflection.
It wasn't a casual thing TO YOU. It lasted 4 years, that isn't CASUAL! So yeah it's not that strange you caught feelings, OP Nor was it wrong to WANT more from him.
However,... (read in full...)
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